>He took everything from you
>Everything you had cared for, gone in an instant
>But doesn’t matter now. No, there is only one thing that matters
>Revenge
>Welcome to Batana Quest
>Your body begins to twitch, eyes slowly opening
>Did you hit your head or something?
>Slowly pushing yourself off of the floor, your hooves begin to shake, belly flopping pathetically onto the carpet yet again
>Surveying the area, your eyes freeze as they pass over the TV in front of you
>The painful memories come flooding back
>Glaring at the paused screen, the sweet, gentle mare of your dreams sits there, helplessly
>As she kisses that rat of a unicorn guard
>Anger begins to well up in you once more, teeth gritting
>He doesn’t deserve her
>He stole her from you, Dusk Deathwing
>And now, now he will pay
>>26949949
Time to go find the people responsible.
To the TV studio in neighpon!
>>26949984
We need to find the ones responsive and touch them so we can fuck with their head so much they will beg for our blade.
>You need to find the ponies responsible for this outrage, and bring them to their knees
>Finally finding the strength to stand up, you sigh, shaking your head
>You really hoped that it wouldn’t have to come to this
>The entire season they had her flirting with him, but you know that she was just a tease, she didn’t mean it
>But this. This was too far
>Unlocking a safe, you reach a hoof in, pulling out a stack of Yens
>Looks like Hijack Studios is going to get a little visit
>It’s a good thing that you’ve been studying your Neighponese, both Kanji and the Osaka dialect
>Grabbing your passport as well, you pause
>What equipment should a noble warrior such as yourself bring with him for his trip?
>>26949939
Edge. Too much edge.
>>26950255
Our glorious katana, hat, and robe.
Also a fedora so we can woo the mistress
>>26950255
Sword (traditionally forged), throwing stars, fedora, and black trenchcoat.
>>26950255
Mangoes
>>26950255
Enlightenment Fedora +12 crit. armor +6 charisma
Classy Leather Trenchcoat +4 stealth +8 charisma
Ancestral Batana 3d6+16 "souldrinker"
And of course, the Mask of Happiness that you must wear everyday as to not frighten ponies to death when they peer into the dark nothingness of your soul
I want Dusk to teach Wishy the secrets of being edgy.
>>26950328
All of this. So much of all of this
>>26950274
No such thing.
>>26950255
-Tara bodypillow (for the ride over there)
-Pocket sand
-cherry bombs(for distractions)
-a ski-mask
-a red bandana (to wear as a symbol of your lost love)
>Trotting into your bedroom, you through open the closet
>If your life was a movie, this is where a montage would have come in handy
>Snatching your customer fedora off the top rack, you flip it into the air, the enlightened hat landing flawlessly on top of your head
>Pulling out a hanger, you carefully remove your trench coat, guaranteed to provide extra stealth and charismatic ability
>A blood red bandanna is next, a symbol of your lost love
>And finally, your signature mask, concealing all but your eyes
>Without it, ponies would be shook to the core if they were to gaze into the nothingness of your soul
>Shoving it all into a suitcase, you move onto your weapon selection
>The usual choices are taken, throwing stars (shurikens, you gaijan), weaponized pocket sand and cherry bombs, and finally, the finishing piece…
>Reaching above your bed, you honorably remove the sword perched above it
>Even you, Dusk, take a moment to subside for the awe as you slowly unsheathe it with a telltale *schwing*
>The sword of your ancestors, folded over 10,000 times
>Known to cut through even the most protective of armor
>You yourself are lucky to own such a fine weapon, as it was the last one in stock at Sickblades.com
>Resheathing it, you cast a gaze over to the dakimakura of your waifu
“Fear not m’lady, for this sword is the key to your liberation!”
>But as you ready yourself to pull off a sick anime move, the door knocks
“Who dares disturb Dusk Deathwing during his montage?”
>Doing a backflip down the stairs, you open up the front door
>A white coated unicorn stands before you
>Ah yes, Carp. Your dim witted protégée
>>26950824
Come on Carp. Whatever you're doing, it's not important, so you have to come with me to the other side of the world.
Yes it's important, and if you back out, I'll curse you forever.
>”Hey Dusk! What’s up?”
“Come on Carp, whatever you’re doing, it's not important”
>”Well, actually my marefriend sent me to tell you that you that if I turn into a bat again, she’ll tear both our nuts off”
“Like I said, not important. But you have to come with me to the other side of the world”
>”Wh-what?”
“It’s very important. And if you back out, I’ll curse you twice as hard”
>”N-no! Not a DOUBLE bat!”
“Yes. Now hurry up and help me pack. Or else”
>The sniveling squirt nods, ears in his eyes
>You honestly don’t know why you keep this pathetic worm around
>Heading back up to your room, lackey in tow, you finish your pre mission checks
>Running back downstairs you grab a few mangoes for the trip, and soon you’re off
>An hour later you and Carp approach the airport, planes rising and lowering onto its tarmacs
>”Dusk please, where are we going? What are we doing? I have work tomorrow!”
>>26951300
We're going to Neighpon.
And if you want, I'll make it look like you were beat up in an alley so that you have an excuse.
>>26951300
We have serious business to attend to in Neighpon.
>>26951300
>Lie
Tell him that is has to do with that dream he had where he met a drunk pony, died and became a robot. You found out that it was actually a premonition and you know who they need to stop to prevent this from happening. Follow it up with a, "the fate of the world depends on it!"
“We have serious business to attend to in Neighpon”
>”N-neighpon?! I can’t go to Neighpon!”
“It’s alright, if you want, I'll make it look like you were beat up in an alley so that you have an excuse to miss work”
>”But Dusk! I didn’t even bring my skub!”
“Trust me, we won’t be there long…”
>”But I don’t go. I was supposed to have dinner with my marefriend”
>You roll your eyes, growing tired of this oaf’s complaining
>Time to scare him straight
“Carp, I didn’t want to have to tell you this, but we’re going there for your own safety”
>He cocks his head to the side
>”What do you mean?”
“I had a dream where you met a drunk pony, died and became a robot”
>”So?”
“Well… I found that that it was actually a premonition. And know who we need to stop to prevent this from happening!”
>”What?!”
“Yes. The fate of the world depends on it”
>”Dusk, please save me! I don’t wanna be a robot!”
“Stop groveling you oaf… but I swear on my waifu that I will prevent this”
>”Thank you Dusk! Thank you!”
>Heh, dumb pinhead
>After heading inside and buying your tickets the two of you wait, checking in your baggage
>”Uh, sir?”
“Can I help you?”
>”… The x-ray showed multiple weapons in your bags”
“And?”
>”And, well you can’t bring those”
>>26951670
Sure I can. Swords are allowed in checked baggage, just not carry ons.
“Sure I can. Swords are allowed in checked baggage, just not carry ons”
>”I… don’t think that carrying a pack of 500 throwing stars is in line with company policy”
“They’re SHURIKENS”
>”Well, I don’t thin-“
>You focus your slit pupiled eyes on hers, glaring into her very soul
>She merely freezes at first, but soon beads of sweat begin to form
>”S-sir?”
>Her ears fold back, legs trembling
“The luggage will be fine.”
>”Y-yes sir”
>And with that she clears you to go
>”Woah Dusk, I can’t understand how we got by that check in, I thought we were rejected”
“The edge, can have a strong influence on the weak minded”
>Shaking your head at your feebleness, you and Carp board the flight
>The trip was long an arduous, though the noble warrior that is Dusk was able to be steadfast, knowing that in time, revenge would be his
>Landing on the runway, the plane settles to a stop
>Grabbing Carp the two of you exit into the terminal not long after
>”Woaaaah…”
“Carp. Welcome, to Neighpon”
>Oh god it’s everything you imagined it would be!
>All the signs are in Kanji!
>Flashing neon signs!
>Now where are those waifus?
>”So where do we find the pony who wants to turn me into a robot?”
>>26952130
He works in this TV studio.
Be sure to send him off to some 'important errand' so we can do our thing undisturbed.
>>26952130
Make make a byline for the animation studio or wherever we can find this fuck.
>Good question
>You suppose you should make a byline for the studio and find the fucker in charge
“Alright Carp, listen to me very carefully. I need you to go do a very important errand”
“How important”
“The fate of the world is in your hooves”
>His jaw drops, stammering
>”Th-the world? Me?”
>You gently nod
“Listen closely. I need you to go pick up a hydrodynamic spatula, with port and starboard attachments and a turbo-drive”
>”Hydrodynamic spatula. Got it!”
“And meet me back at the terminal in two hours. Got it?”
>”Sure do Dusk!”
>He begins to gallop off, but comes to a sudden halt
>”Oh, and uh, Dusk”
“Yeah?”
>”If the world ends, I’m sorry…”
“You’ll do fine Carp. Just me”
>A small grin forms on his muzzle, tears welling u in his blue eyes
>Turning once more he scampers off
>Well, that should keep him busy for a while
>Grabbing your bag, you exit the terminal, heading out into the world
>Not long after, you find yourself in the bustling city
>Barely containing your excitement, you peer this way and that, taking it all in
>Such a superior society, now you know why you felt so out of place with the rest of those filthy gaijan
>You only wish that you could stick around and enjoy the culture, but there is a job to be done
>And you will not rest until it is completed
>After intense map studying and practicing your Neighponese with the locals, you finally turn down a street, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk
>Right across the road stands a modern looking building
>Hijack Studios
>>26952604
I saw this in a movie once.
We have to get a tour, and then peel off when we're at the relevant part of the building.
>Now how to get inside?
>Just then you conveniently see a group of ponies walk up to the door, a Neighponese mare guiding them inside
>”-nd remember, no flash photography!”
>Hmm. You’ve seen this in a movie once
>Just join a tour group and sneak away when you find the important parts of the building
>Dusk, you are a freaking genius
>Quickly trotting up, bag of gear at your side, you get into the back of the group
>Stepping inside their the glass doors, you find yourself looking at an immaculate building, with a small fountain in the lobby
>Place must have cost a fortune, although that’s not too hard to imagine. Hijack studios is one of the most well regarded companies in the business
>Well, that is until last night’s episode…
>”So just follow me this way, and we’ll get started!”
>Doing your best to blend in with the group, you move forward
>”Hijack studios was founded upon quality scenery, and grand sets, as you can see here!”
>She points to a long display of former set pictures
>”After almost going bankrupt from allegations of stealing content, the studio quickly recovered, cranking out new seasons of Commandeer, one of the most watched series on TV!”
>The guide points a hoof
>”Which is actually all filmed right in there”
>Your head cranks, following her point
>A pair of double doors sits at the end of the hallway, STAGE 2 written above them
>>26952930
Use our 1337 S734L7H 5K1LLZ to sneak in.
>>26952930
Ask who is usually in charge of making the show. Like making important decisions.
>You quickly raise your hoof
>”Yes sir, in the back?”
“And uh, who exactly is in charge of making the show? Like making important decisions and all that?”
>”Oh that would be Mr. Hiji. He actually oversees Commandeer personally during filming”
>Oversees filming, eh?
“Thank you for that”
>”No problem! No if you’ll all follow me this way…”
>The group begins to walk away, but you’ve got other plans
>Using your finely honed stealth skills, you slip away, heading straight for the doors
>Gently pushing the doors open, you peak your head inside
>”Alright everypony, 10 minute break! Then we’ll start the next scene”
>Across the stage various ponies walk around a set, some carrying things, others standing in groups talking
>>26953232
Make your way across set. If anyone asks questions say you're a new character.
>Making sure your bag is firmly slung across your side, you slip into the room, quietly shutting the door behind you
>Your hooves click with each step across the wooden stage, watching several set builders go by, carrying props
>Oh cool! There’s oak tree #12 from last week’s episode!
>As you move along, you look straight ahead, only for your vision to be encompassed by a curious mare
>”Um… can I help you sir?”
“Oh hey! Yeah I’m actually an new actor here, playing a new character”
>”What character?”
“D-dusk?”
>”… Dusk?”
“Yeah! He’s a new artifact hunter!”
>”Well… hang on, I’ll go talk to the stage manager. But it the meantime, your acting mates are right over here”
>She walks you over to a circle of chatting ponies
>No way
>No fucking way
>It’s the Commandeer cast!
>There’s Maple the griffon!
>And Essy!
>And… oh god
>Your heart nearly stops, eyes blinking in disbelief
>A sleek bat mare stands in the group, telltale bandanna on her head
>Your… your waifu
>>26953689
Gotta get her alone.
>You have to get her alone, away from these other charlatans
>Slowly creeping you way over, you try to look as inconspicuous as possible
>That is until you’re right next to her
>”H-hey”
>She turns to you, bright eyes blinking
>”Well hi there”
>Germaneigh accent? What happened to her Neighponese one?
>No matter, you can just curse her vocal cords later
>”You new here?”
“Y-you too”
>”Uh…”
“I mean yes! I’m playing Dusk, a new character”
>”Odd, they didn’t tell us that. Well it’s nice to meet you”
>She reaches out, extending a hoof
>This… this is happening
>You’ve waited years for this moment
>You grasp the hoof, arm tingling as you do so
>It may have just been a simple hoof shake, but to you, it’s everything you imagined it would be
>Oh god her fur is so silky smooth…
“Thank you m’lady, it was an honor meeting you”
>She places a hoof on her mouth, stifling a giggle
>”Well, aren’t you a gentlecolt?”
“Heh, I suppose so… but hey, why don’t we step back here an-“
>”Hey there!”
>Your gaze shifts over, eyes going wide
>No…
>A unicorn in armor takes his place by your waifu, smiling
>”I play Iron on the show. I see you’ve already met my partner”
>He reaches over, puling her into a hug
>...
>Dusk.exe has stopped working
>>26953967
p-partner, eh? In the show of course.
>>26953967
It's okay. All we need to do to curse her is touch her.
>She giggles once more, returning the hug to that bastard
>You begin to subconsciously grit your teeth, anger welling
>Woah, calm down Dusk, no need to get upset. There’s just actors after all
“P-partners eh?”
>They both nod in unison, smiling
>”Sure are!”
“In the show of course, right?”
>”Oh I guess you saw that last episode huh?”
“Trust me… I saw it”
>”It’s funny really. We’ve been dating for years, and they just finally included that scene”
>He leans in puckering his lips
>She does the same in turn, closing her eyes
>You feel like you’re already icy heart is beginning to shatter
>>26954205
ke externally and unsheathe batana.
>>26954205
Who are we to deny them their love?
>>26954261
We are Dusk Deathwing, slayer of gods and ponies who support bad ships. You are the bat that trained for years to learn how to cry blood, and who spent years studying ancient anime masters in the art of swordplay.
And this is a pleb who is currently stealing the true love of your life. Your very soulmate that the angel of death told you in a sixty hour anime marathon influenced dream was destined to be yours.
There is only one logical remaining solution. We have to start slashing our katana until the bad feelings go away.
>>26954261
a self obsessed autist?
>>26954356
Oh. Right.
>For a moment you hesitate, unsure of what to do
>After all, who are you to deny them their love?
>… You’re Dusk fucking Deathwing!
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
>Right before their lips touch both their eyes fly open in surprise, just in time to see you unsheathing your batana
>”Wh-what the hell?!”
>Screeing at the top of your lungs you swing your sword, aiming right for his dumb horn
>Except somehow in your blind rage he is just barely able to dive out of the way, the sword smashing into the stage floor, wooden splinters flying
>Your waifu quickly scurries away, looking on in shock, along with every other pony on the set who has stopped their work, looking at the scene
>Prying the blade loose, you spin it acorns your hoof, catching it
>Pointing the tip at him, you looks on in terror
>”What is your god damn problem?! You could have killed me!”
>>26949939
>Another autistic batshit CYOA
You batfags really are fucking cancer.
>>26954500
Thats the plan you waifu stealing small hooved pinhead!
>>26954500
That's the idea
>You smirk at the panicked fool
“Tch. That’s the idea”
>”But… why? I don’t even know who you are!”
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you stole my waifu you small hooved pinhead!”
>Raising the sword once more you prepare to strike the final blow, you step forward, prepared to finish off this worm
>But before it falls, ending his worthless existence, a voice stops you
>”Just what exactly is going on here?”
>Looking over your shoulder, a blueish stallion stands on the stage
“Who wants to know?”
>”Listen here buddy, I’m in charge of this studio. You’ve got about 10 seconds to scram before I call security”
>>26954611
I'll only need 5. The other 5 are for you for ordering the scene.
“Heh”
>You slowly shake your head
“I’ll only need five”
>He raises an eyebrow to your comment
“The other 5 are for you for ordering the scene”
>”Excuse me?”
“YOU RUINED MY WAIFU!”
>Whizzing around you ready your sword, but your sick moves seemed to have startled the lesser ponies
>All around they flee in every direction, the stage becoming a stampede
>But as you go to destroy your targets, you see that dumb pinhead running off with your waifu in one direction, the asshat producer who ordered all of this running in the other
>>26954785
Chase the waifu, obviously.
>>26954785
waifu
>Looking back and forth, the greatest decision of your life is at hand
>Kill the guy who aired this sick filth in the first place
>Or kill the guy who stole your waifu
>Looking back you see the unicorn galloping along, the bat mare right behind him
>As much as it pains you to do this, the producer will be spared
>For now
>Flapping your wings you launch yourself towards the pinhead, screeing mid air
>By the time he looks back, it’s too late
>Right before contact is made, you freeze time itself, the world slowing to a crawl
>Deploying a lifetime of accumulated training in the space of a few seconds, you furiously slash away, hundreds of precise cuts being made within a nanosecond
>With one finally slash you backflip away, resuming time
>A shockwave hits you as the unicorn explodes into a ball of flames, nothing left but a faint scorch mark left on the floor
“Heh… nothing personnel”
>Now for the prize
>Looking up with as much of a gentlecolt look as you can muster you find the m’lady pushed back against the wall, eyes as large as dinner plates as she whimpers
>Obvious must have been overcome by such an incredible display of finesse
>>26954890
Tip your fedora and move in for the romantic kiss.
>Trotting over confidentially, you place a hooves on the wall beside her, propping yourself up
“M’lady”
>Raising your other hoof you give your fedora a respectful tip
>She seems to be even more awestruck than before
>And who said that gentlebats finish last?
>Leaning in, you pucker your lips, ready for the romantic kiss that you’ve earned
>”Freeze!”
>Slowly looking back, security personnel flood into the room
>Soon the entire area is surrounded with dozens of them
>”Step away from the mare immediately”
>Your hoof starts to lower back to your sheathed blade
>They want a fight? You’ll give them one
>A shattering noise hits your ears, glass raining down onto the floor
>Looking up, a pony comes crashing through the skylight
“… Carp?”
>He starts to fly down to you, holding onto some rotating object
“Is that a-“
“Hydrodynamic spatula! With port and starboard attachments! Oh, and don’t forget the turbo-drive!”
>Soon he hovers a mere few feet above you
>”Come on Dusk, we’ve got to get out of here!”
Dusk and Carp died on the way back to their home planet.
Quest over faggots, Urban continuing tomorrow
>>26955094
That was fun
Upboat
>>26956320
fuck off fgt
>>26955094
n-no
