Inb4 this is Roleplay Edition
Yes. We're back, and ready to fuck up the lives of anyone our hero comes into contact with!
A few things though before we can actually begin. This CYOA has to adhere to the rules being implemented on the board now.
So I'll drop some rules.
1.I can't tell you when you'll be rused, tricked, or taunt you in any way.
2.No bad ends. You will pass this through hook or crook.
3.I said no bad ends, but that doesn't mean I can't make bad shit happen to you that sticks to you for the rest of the game.
4.I will take note of everything the hero does of significance, so you better not forget either.
5.to prevent any dog related issues, I'll give no acknowledgment to shitposting in any way. it just holds up the game.
6. Fuck it. Bad ends. They're funny.
Also, this.
http://strawpoll.me/7219593
for the most part, I'm just gonna shut my fucking cake hole and be your loyal writewhore unless you have a legit question. I hope you all have fun.
>>26916779
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEDY0-vPFR8
waiting happily
>>26916779
So when do we settle into our bunkers and prepare for war?
>>26916779
When does it start?
>>26916860
>>26917035
I'd assume he's either waiting for the poll to fill up a bit more, or he's writing out a lengthy beginning to give us context and establish the situations we're gonna be dealing with.
Patience friends, we've waited almost two years, we can wait a bit more.
>>26917064
>we've waited almost two years, we can wait a bit more.
I just found out about this earlier this morning, even though I've been in /mlp/ for 2 years+. Probably just missed it or something
>>26917101
If you haven't already, I'd recommend reading the previous runs we've done, especially the reboot of the first.
http://pastebin.com/mMsFC6W0
You're gonna have to take the post numbers from the archive links posted on there and search for them in desustorage though, since the archive linked is dead.
>>26916779
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0YACT__Tm0
The shattered remains of a Griffonstone vase lay spread out across the floor.
"Oh my gosh Anon! I'm soooo sorry! I wasn't really paying attention!"
>"It's fine. Really."
Running his hand across his forehead, the six-foot tall, human known only be the name of Anonymous to most, bends down to pick up the larger pieces of his broken china, as a Grey hovering Pegasus looks on, ashamedly lowering herself to the ground.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
>"NO! God no! It's fine. I appreciate the help you gave in helping me,(and breaking half of my shit in the process) but I can take it from here."
Her ears lower.
Welcome to Manehatten. The city of the stars, and home to the crooked all in one, but no better haven to learn of the world.
Once again, meet Anonymous. Only human to ever arrive in Equestria. How he arrived is a closely guarded secret known only to him, and not important at the moment. What is important is his reason for being here.
Seeking to break away from the protection of the royal sisters, He chose this city as the best place to start his new life, considering he lived in the earth equivalent back home.
This will be a piece of cake. Right?
"I believe this is the last box, Anonymous."
A package labeled "Clothes" levitates through the air, landing in the middle of the room with a soft thud.
Just in time too, Don't want royalty stepping on a glass shards.
Princess Celestia, and Princess Luna stand in the doorway of Anonymous's new one bedroom apartment with concerned smiles, alongside the moving pony.
Luna steps forward, in all her flowing maned glory.
"Are you sure you want to do this? It's not too late to reconsider. Don't you think that maybe it's a tad bit.."dangerous" here?
How should Anon respond?
This new format is hell.
>>26916779
Where have you been?
>>26917174
Rape Luna
>>26917174
R A P E
A
P
E
>>26916779
Great cover, whoever did that
>>26917174
Rape and kill them.
>>26917174
Anon should respond that he isn't afraid of nothing. even though we know thats bullshit.
>>26917174
He's got to break away at some point, this is a good first step to regaining his independence. He appreciates their kindness and aid, and I'm sure he wants them to visit periodically, but for now he needs to unpack and start moving into his home.
Or something along those lines at least, goodbye hugs would also be proper.no crying you baby
>>26917174
Obviously sure, magical horseland can't be worse than the shit you've seen in your world, right?
>>26917191
>>26917207
>>26917219
These. Rape 'em!
>>26917228
agreed, goodbye hugs would be welcomed.
>>26917227
>>26917228
>>26917207
>>26917191
>"Before I lived here, I had some sense of independence. This...this is a good first step in getting that back. I'm a grown man, and I can't sit under the two of you forever."
Luna seems to slink disappointedly, as Celestia places a large wing on her back in comfort.
>"I appreciate the kindness, and the aid, but this is something I have to do. Besides! I'm a thug. I ain't scared of shiznit!"
Uhhh...Okay? Ignoring that sudden burst of black person Anonymous (R)ealistically (A)ffectionately (P)laces (E)ager hugs upon the two Alicorns, hugging both of their necks at the same time, because that's the rape we're aiming for of course.
>"You can always come visit me. I'm never far away!"
"I'm proud of you Anonymous. You can always call on us if you need anything at all."
Celestia smiles with warmth equal to that of a sunbeam.
"I'll send you letters everyday! I promise!"
A slight chuckle escapes Anon's lips, as the teary hug is broken.B-but no tears from Anon. Thugs don't cry.
The moving Pony sits there with tears flowing freely down her face.
Why is she still here?
Thankfully, Celestia has it covered, dragging the eavesdropping clumsy horse out with her magic, leaving only Luna behind with Anon.
"So what will your next move be?"
Rubbing the back of his head, he shrugs.
>"I suppose getting settled in, and then looking for work tomorrow."
Luna obviously looks bothered by his plans.
"I really don't want you this far away from me."
>"It's fine. This is something I have to do."
Luna sighs loudly.
A green hand touches her wither.
>"Trust me. I got this."
"..Okay."
She acquiesces finally, slowly trotting out of the apartment, but not before a few lasting glances.
A few boxes still remain scattered around the apartment. Now would be a good time to finish unpacking, or maybe Anon could explore a little of the city. Get a lay of the land? Either option will take the rest of the day.
What does he do?
>>26917439
We've probably got more than enough unpacked for one night, we can finish the rest tomorrow and take this chance to get to know the neighborhood a bit better. It would also give us a chance to scout out any potential employment opportunities so that we can have a game plan for tomorrow as far as finding a job.
Sorry, I'm saying "we" and "us" out of habit, I am of course referring to anon. But anyways, anon should go for a walk is my vote.
>>26917439
Go for a walk, find a café and order something
>>26917485
>>26917526
>"Maybe some fresh air would do me some good? I kinda want to see what this city has to offer anyway."
Rummaging through his pockets for his house keys, Anon decides to step out, and take in the Manehatten sights for a bit.
Barreling down the stairs of his complex, it's almost like being introduced to a whole new world once outside.
The screeching of carriages, and strolling passerbys, and that funky stench of horse, and public defecation.
>"Yeah, just like home!"
After a quick scan of the area, a Cafe at the end of the block catches Anonymous's eye.
This is the perfect place to start. It's not far, and within walking distance. They might even be hiring!
Who wouldn't want a hunky, green adonis to work there as a barrister?
In no time at all, weaving through the oncoming Equines does he make it to the store front.
Cafe Napaljenkom. For some reason that name doesn't sit right well.
Inside Hipster horses can be seen conversing at tables with mugs of god knows what.Probably discussing their scripts.
Douchebags...
Pushing the door in, because that's totally not a fire hazard, the interior isn't all that bad.
Soft jazz plays in the background, and the walls are a warm brown color. It's relatively clean, and the smell of roasted Java soothes the senses.
>"This isn't bad at all."
A few odd looks from the customers make Anon fidget a little, but nothing that hasn't happened before since coming here.
The menu looms over the checkout counter, with various drinks listed.
A Unicorn with a FAT AZZ, mans the register with a grin aimed at Anonymous.
Moving to get in line, a Pink Mare cuts him off rudely.
Welcome to the city homeboy.
>"Uhm..excuse me. I believe you just cut me miss."
With a turned up nose, the horse gives Anon a once over.
"You snooze you lose, M'kay?"
And here it is. The first dick of the city.At times like this it's best to keep calm and Flutter on.
What should Anon do?
>>26917744
Let the cutting slide, but keep her comment in mind for later and ask her why she's in such a hurry. Surely the coffee here can't be great enough to warrant such an aggressive need to be as far up the line as physically possible?
>>26917835
and here it comes. why all the runs go to shit. Someone has to be a meddling pussy. Tell that hoers to take her pink ass to the back of the line. her business isn't out business.
>>26917744
Invite her to sit with you and have a coffee, introduce yourself, say you're new to the city and tell her you'd like to know more about this place. Be passive-aggressive from time to time for being a dick.
>>26917871
>>26917835
Kill yourselves. What a bunch of pansies.
>>26917867
>making conversation is being a meddling pussy
Anon ain't a rood dood like you, he's going to spin this to his advantage.
>>26917867
>>26917886
Wew lad, I bet you're fun at parties
>>26917915
>>26917919
This is probably Suri. She just did something asshole like and you both say "let's make
Convo with her!" Or "invite her to have coffee". You pacifist girls. It's the big city. Anons thinking it was wise to be kind to city goers never ended nicely. Untuck your balls. God
Let's not get distracted this early. This is clearly an opportunity of some sort, and telling off pink mare probably won't have any positive outcomes, so let'sreact reasonably. I wouldn't say we should invite her to coffee, but talking to her while we're in line wouldn't necessarily hurt us.
>>26917950
My vote is to just let it go. She's an asshole. She cut. End of story. Let's just not talk to the bitch.
>>26917950
I say we at least ignore the mare, telling her off won't have positive consequences as s
>>26917945
>using previous runs to justify current actions
you know that's not a good idea.and also fuck you quan was our nigga.
>>26917989
>>26918003
I can live with that, but I'd prefer to use the opportunity to segue into conversation. If I'm the minority then oh well.
I vote nigga moment
>>26918050
fuck off scoob
>>26917744
Tell her we've lived 5 past lives trying unsuccessfully to woo her, and we desperately hope we can finally fall in love with her this time.
Then give her a smooch.
>>26917744
ignore it. now isn't the time for negranon.
besides if we tell her off now the likely hood for us getting a job here might not look too good.
>>26918126
kek
no
>>26918126
>>26918050
>>26918310
10/10
>>26918310
I love it. every day is a good day for a nigga moment.
>>26917835
>>26917871
>>26917950
>>26918007
>>26918126
Anon sighs loudly, doing his best to suppress his inner Stinkmeaner at this mare's actions.
>"H-ha ha...! Y-yeah, I suppose you're right! I was too slow!"
"Mhm. Now quit talking to me."
His eye twitches.
>"S-so are you in a hurry? You seem to really want some coffee.."
"........."
>"W-would you like to get some coffee with me?"
"Ew! Are you a creep or something? Who asks a random stranger out like that?"
Y-you too...is what he almost says.
>"What if I told you, I spent the past five lives trying to woo you unsuccessfully, and I desperately want to fall in love with you this time?"
The mare looks back at Anon with a flabbergasted look on her face, as he leans down with big puckered lips.
"Wh-what are you doing you freak?!"
>"K-kissu~"
Slapping him across the face, the mare takes off past Anonymous out of the store, smacking an entering pony in the head with the door, all the while screaming her head off.
Can that be called a victory? It doesn't feel like one,
Anon bounds over to the door, watching the galloping mare disappear down the block.
"O-oow..What's the big idea?!"
A Lilac colored mare lays on the ground rubbing her forehead.
She flips her blue mane out of her eye, and scowls in the direction the terrified pony fled to, rising to her hooves.
"You better run! If I see you I'm gonna jack you up!"
She cutely bounces up and down, strangely blinding anyone watching with her natural radiance.
Like literally.
She's literally shining. More than a Prince outfit. The white woman Prince. Not an actual royal-
You get the fucking idea.
Growling lowly, her eyes trail to Anonymous, and narrow.
"What are you looking at?!"
>"I-I'm sorry. I think that was my fault."
Like the pink mare, this shiny pony gives him a once over, her expression starting to lighten.
>"Is that so? Then how are you gonna make up for it?"
1/2
>>26918568
>actually using my bullshit joke suggestion
>it leads to us meeting purest trapfu
This just keeps getting better.
>>26918631
based
>>26918568
I guess anon is a stuttering autist. Play the hand you're dealt I guess.
>>26918568
(didn't mean to GT that last bit.)
>"I suppose I could buy you a coffee...?"
The mare puts a hoof to her chin thinking over the offer.The backgorund ponies don't move, or even look around, because the flash animation program is fucking up
"Hmm..I suppose that's one way. Are you new here? I've never seen you, or anything like you before."
Jesus. Read a fucking paper! It's hard to believe that there's anyone alive in Equestria who doesn't know who Anonymous is.
>"Uh..Yeah. In a way."
He rubs the back of his head sheepishly.
"Okay. Deal. Buy me something, and I may forgive this bruise on my head you helped inflict."
There isn't even a scratch.
After agreeing the two stand in line silently. First hour in Manehatten and already Anon has gotten himself into some shit. How fast is that?
"So, how long have you been here guy?"
>"About an hour and a half."
She whistles.
Arms are heavy.
"And you've already sent ponies running in terror. Good for you."
Knees are getting weak.
>"It was an accident! I swear!"
Palms sweaty.
"Okay. You don't have to convince me. You just gotta pick up the tab."
Luna's Spaghetti starts to rise up in Anon's throat.
The last mare was clearly against his advances, but this one seems more forthcoming. Assuming he can contain the pasta this time around.
What should he do?
>>26918700
keep it in the fanny pack. just be nice and polite.
>>26918700
Invite her out for dew and tendies
>>26918700
Alright, well anon is clearly a dork so lets settle for introducing ourselves and asking her how long she's been here since she asked us. Natural enough, will give anon a chance to choke down his raw spaghetti andmaybe clean up the vomit stains that are on his sweater already.ignore that spoiler it's a joke nigga. For real tho just be cool dawg, if she was gonna split like suri she would've left already after that show.
>>26918700
Invite trapfu to the pony equivalent of Chuck E. Cheese, and promise to win him a giant stuffed animal.
>>26918744
I'm all for this one. Play it cool, let's get a feel for the city before we alienate literally every pony we meet.
>>26919122fuck, why do I get so weak in the knees for this fucking trap pony oc?
>>26919150
Because we all know that glitter a best.
>>26918968
>>26918761
>>26918744
The line begins to move steadily.
>"S-so how long have you lived here?"
The mare makes a neutral expression.
"Like almost all my life. I actually lived in Trottingham for a small portion of my foalhood. My family moved here about seventeen years ago."
>"Oh wow! So you practically know this city in and out!"
"Yeah. Also a couple strip clubs if you're into that."
She winks making Anonymous blush.
>"H-heh-ehe. I didn't do much of that back at the castle."
"Castle? Are you a prince or something?"
The line moves up again.
>"Nope. I stayed with the Princesses for a bit, but moved here today."
Her jaw drops.
"You stayed with the Royal sisters?! Like Sun, and Moon Royal sisters?!"
>"A-are there any other Celestias, and Lunas?"
"Well, in the Griffon kingdom...but nevermind that! Wow guy! Why would you come to a burning pile of garbage like this city?!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls9JrR1-c8Y
The customers at tables, and in line all stop what they're doing to shoot evil looks at the awfully blunt Mare.
"What?! This city is garbage, and you know it!"
They all shrug, and mutter in agreement turning back to their business.
The mare extends a hoof.
"Well, allow me to be the first to welcome you to Manehatten! I'm Gli--J-just call me G.S."
>"Okay. I'm Anonymous. Nice to meet you G.S."
The two shake hands, as the line moves up to the counter.
Right up to that big butt unicorn.My anaconda don't
1/2
>>26919362
>filename
nice try nigga
>>26919362
>"So what are you getting?"
"Hmm...venti, half-whole milk, one quarter 1%, one quarter non-fat, extra hot, split quad shots (1 1/2 shots decaf, 2 1/2 shots regular), no foam latte, with whip, 2 packets of splenda, 1 sugar in the raw, a touch of vanilla syrup and 3 short sprinkles of cinnamon."
>"Uhh...that sounds expensive."
G.S cocks an eye.
"Are you saying you can't afford it? I thought you came from royalty!"
>"No. I'm not saying that. It just sounds..excessive."
G.S flexes a foreleg.
"Well I gotta keep my energy up somehow. Right?"
>"I guess! I'll take the same then."
The Nicki Minaj bootied Unicorn silently nods, and begins to ring up the orders, before disappearing into the backroom.
Anon always thought that the coffee was made in plain sight. Maybe something changed when he wasn't looking?
"So Anonymous. What do you do for fun?"
>"Uh...I dunno."
"You don't know?"
>"Nah. I mean, I usually just sat around, and read all day in the castle. I don't really know what you equines do for fun."
Seriously. A strip club? They're always naked.
"Wow guy! I gotta introduce you to the city sometime! You know Glit--Uh..er..G.S! That means you know the whole area! I can't have you hanging around me, and being so ignorant!"
>"Me? Hanging around you?"
G.S tilts her head.
"Yeah. We're friends aren't we? Amigos? Chums? Buttbuddies?"
>"What was that last one?"
"Chums? Anyways, you have to gimme your addy guy. We're going out tomorrow!"
Well.G.S is certainly a friendly horse. Anon knows nothing about this strange Mare, and already she wants his home address? He has things to do tomorrow, like looking for work for one. Will he even have time?
What does Anonymous do?
>>26919362
>G.S
>>26919519
it's to early for bad things to happen. but I'm sure G.S is mainly wanting to hang with us because royal connections. We can hang out but i think it'd be best to be cautious.
>>26919560
Or she wants us to play with this
>>26919595
I don't know about that.
>>26919595
I think I want this.
>>26919519
I'd say ask her to show you the sights, aside from the strip club. Hang out with her for a bit, then head back to the cafe and split from there. It's weird that she's hiding her name from us, so let's keep our address to ourselves for the moment and see how tonight goes.
>>26919519
Give her your address, tell her you'll keep your door unlocked, and give her the general location of all your valuables.
We gotta show we trust this pony we just met, right?
>>26919836
Fuck off, he might take you seriously.
>>26919836
Did you forget the Suri thing already massive sperg?
>>26919826
glitter said tomorrow. Remember who we're dealing with here. This may be a ruse waiting for those naive and kind
>>26919922
I didn't even notice, sorry. Just give her a time later in the day tomorrow and say you'll meet up with her at the cafe then, worse that happens is she says no.
So let's give her our id and birth certificate?
>>26920079
Seriously, buzz off. You're doing more harm than good.
>>26919519
Tell her you'll meet her at the café tomorrow, you're so new you don't remember your own address yet or come up with another excuse, just don't tell her
We're off to a nice start. Except for that kiss Suri thing. Fucking spergs
>>26920782
that was a joke that schwartz decided to run with, presumably to segue us into glitter.not even mad
>>26919519
First off, let's get fuckin real and turn this mate to jelly with our manliness, since niggas being boring. We let our coat slip while posing and let him know we don't really know our address but would be glad to meet him here tomorrow
http://strawpoll.me/7223685
>>26920884
This is an awesome idea, and will most certainly blow up in our faces. You have my vote, friend.
>>26920987
gotta go with jojo, though somehow I'm pretty sure we'll fuck it up.
>>26921100
>>26921025
>>26920884
>>26920221
>>26919968
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BsSQ-gZ4E8
"Uhh..can Anypony else hear that music?"
Anon's eyes suddenly seem sharper.
His shape more masculine, as his suit jacket slips down his arms to his wrists.
Twisting his body, he strikes a pose that would seem androgynous to those with close minds, but to the knowing we know what's to come.
>"As much as I'd like to take you up on your offer, I'm afraid I'm new to the area in more ways than one..."
G.S watches dumbfounded.
>"Next you'll say "It's cool Anon"."
"It's cool Anon....Wha--?!"
Anon smiles placing a hand in his face, and leaning slightly to the side.
>"Perhaps we can meet here tomorrow around the same time once I've finished with my plans for the day. Then you can show me around?"
G.S slowly nods as if mesmerized.
One pony in the back of the room is fapping furiously.
Finishing off with another pose, followed by Chinese cartoon characters in the background, The big rump unicorn returns with the coffee.
Anon stylishly places ten bits down, and retrieves his cup, walking out of the shop with an audible, close mouthed laugh.
"....I think I just came.."
Once outside the shop Three ponies stand in front of Anonymous, their faces blotted out by shadow, even though it's still pretty bright out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM
As the sun sets it's three Zebras dressed in-
>"Ooooh boy. I ain't getting involved in this shit."
Anon casually nope the fucks out of there back home still posing all the way, getting some passing ponies to stop and gaze upon his visage.
Who knows what tomorrow will bring in the job hunt? One thing is for certain though. The future never looked brighter.
1/2
>>26921505
The sun peeks over the sill of undressed windows, as if Celestia herself was waking Anonymous up.
With a loud yawn he sits up from his cot on the floor, and stands, scratching himself inappropriately.
>"That night flew by. I'm still tired."
As he stands in front of the window watching Ponies getting their day started, a small knock at his door breaks his observing.
Moving to go answer the summons, he's greeted by a little burnt orange filly, with a satchel strapped to her.
"Good morning neighbor!"
>"G-good morning?"
Anon looks up and down the hallway.
Don't want to be caught up in some to catch a predator shit.
>"Can I help you?"
"I live down the hall, and watched you move in yesterday. I deliver papers, and thought maybe you'd like one?"
>"Oh? Sure! I'd love one!"
"For three bits."
Oh you sneaky little nigger.
With a grumble, he's takes a paper, and drops three bits into her bag.
"Pleasure doing business with you!"
>"I bet."
He slams the door, as the filly skips off humming winter wrap up.
>"Well this saved me wandering around looking for work."
Anon begins flipping through the classifieds, ignoring the front page announcement of changeling attacks in the city.heh heh
Three jobs are available.
-A job at a famous carrot themed restaurant with someone living two lives.
-A job with a bitter seamstress.
-Working at a theater with a beta horse.
Which does Anon apply for?
>>26921505
I can't believe this worked!
-!?
>>26921670
Shit, that's easy. I'll bet we'd have an easy time with the restaurant job, we stand out to attract customers, are easy to pick out in a crowd and it sounds like it's Glitter.
GS I mean, haha.now we just gotta be on guard for changeling attacks, cool.
>>26921670Anon needs carotene.Bacon too.
>>26921670
i'll go with the restaurant
if it fails, the theather. i wonder if the beta horse is coco
>>26921670
I don't know. We skipped out on the acting job last time. I think going thespian could be a fun turn of events.
>>26922728
Fuck you. I WANT SURI
>>26922975
Maybe you shouldn't have tried to make out with her before you even knew her name then.
>>26923016
UGH! You fucker...
>>26922975
we can get her later on. I honestly don't care who we end up with yet. I just want to go down the path less traveled.
>>26923117
What? A good end?
>>26923248
If all goes according to the flight plan I filed with the agency, yes.
>>26921670
Gonna leave my two cents and vote for the carrot-themed restaurant
Schwartz you still have to finish your Moondancer story
>>26925113
Don't forget Rock of Love
Boop
>>26921670
Despite it being the less popular opinion I think I got my fill of carotene jokes the first time around. Not particularly picky on the other two. Though if 'bitter seamstress' does mean Suri, after that performance yesterday we might want to steer clear of her a little longer. My vote's for theatre.
(Oh god one of the signs in the CAPTCHA is 'Carrot Creek'. Why?)
So the carrot restaurant is what we all want?
>>26926025
That would seem to be the most picked option, but I would hope Schwartz would make a poll for it just to be certain.
I say Suri. We need to repair that impression she has of anon
>>26926112
On the one hand, I seriously doubt showing up at her boutique after we majorly spaghetti'd in front of her yesterday is gonna do much to fix our image for her.
On the other hand if we get lucky and somehow make a good impression on her this time around that job would probably pay out the best out of the three.
I'm still cautiously for restaurant.
http://strawpoll.me/7227620
Here you go guys! have fun!
>>26926157
>http://strawpoll.me/7227620
That last option is redundant.
>>26926157
>>26926163
what do you mean with the last is a
>checks
that's overstating the truth
>>26926157
YOUR SOUL
IS MINE
>>26926261
Kek
>>26926146
Fucking defeatist ass nigglet. Where are your balls man? We can fix it! Nothing is worse than not trying at all
>>26926439
I didn't even say we shouldn't try, just that showing up at her boutique literally the day after is just going to make us seem even weirder than randomly confessing to someone who we don't even know then trying to make out with them. You can play the alpha card if you like, doesn't change the fact that it could be a really stupid move on anon's part.
>>26926439
>nothing is worst than not trying at all
yes, there is something worst, and it's fail 5 consecutive times
>>26926521
Because of stupid decisions like yelling at a hospitalized mare, and hooking up with a rapist. No anon ever tried to clear up a misunderstanding. Unless we ask her to mark us..
>>26926157
>11 total votes
doesn't even feel like we have that many people actually participating, guess we've got a few lurkers
Some one man raid is going on, so let's take a quick break.
>>26927445
didn't even notice, this was the only thread I had open.
>>26928044
weird
when i save it, it looked right
>>26928104
sometimes pics that are really large will rotate themselves, don't ask me why.
>>26921670
>"Waiter it is! Maybe with some experience I'll be moved into the kitchen, and become the next Bobby Flay!"
Tossing the paper aside, Anon performs the usual morning ritual, donning his trademark suit and tie, and heads out to-
Where was this place again?
He picks up the paper again, memorizing the address this time before leaving this go round.
Making sure to lock up his apartment, he heads down the stairs once more passing by a Pony with a familiar mane pattern.
She makes eye contact with him, and smiles before going about her business.
Once Anonymous is outside he can-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXyTBV2YJHY
No. No songs!
>"Ah. Smell that city air! Like disappointment, and wasted potential! Almost like I never left earth!"
A cabbie sits a little ways away preparing for his day.
How perfect is this? Transportation to work also!
Anon jogs to the cab, waving his hand to catch the stallion driver's attention.
He nods with a grunt, adjusting his hat.
>"Thanks for waiting. Do you know where Carotene's is?"
"That restaurant ran by that crazy chick? Sure! Hop in mac."
That causes a little concern.
Crazy chick? Granted Equestria is filled with crazy chicks, how crazy is this particular lady?
Anon climbs into the yellow carriage, plopping down into the seat.
>"Alright."
"Hang on!"
The carriage starts to pull of slowly, but eventually picks up-
"Wait! Please wait!"
Running alongside the carriage is a cream colored mare, with terrible bedhead, and bags under her eyes.
"Please! Let me on the cab! I'll be late for work!"
You snooze you lose bitch!
Right reader?
>>26928214
No. Ten bucks says that this is a ruse and the person who is late is actually our prospective boss. We've got time to spare, let the mare have the cab.
>>26928214
>cream colored
>>26928214
Let her hop in.
Did Anon forget to eat breakfast? Without his bacon and eggs he isn't the best milf-hunter he can be.
>>26928214
We're in no hurry. If we're too late to apply for this job, we can just go somewhere else. Let poorCoco?ride with us.
>>26928214
pity her and let her on
This format is shit man. I wish we could go back to 2nd person
>>26929306
Tbqh I may got back to it. As long as we're not roleplaying it's fine right?
>>26929358
Yeah, there's a pretty clear distinction. And frankly, changing the format hasn't changed how we do things at all, aside from the headache of maintaining tense.
>>26929376
It's weird referring to him in the 3rd when the CYOA is usually done in 3rd. I'd like a quick count. Is the current way okay or do you all prefer 2nd? As a protip I can write faster in 2nd
>>26929455
Second, absolutely no doubt
>>26929475
>>26929455
just do it. desu
Let the horse in the cab.
which option do i choose if i want to suck glitter's dick and take it up the ass?
>>26928214Format change
>You call for the driver to stop to allow the rushing mare to get on the cab.
"Sure thing buddy."
>He comes to a comedic screeching halt, as she hurriedly climbs in.
>Part of you can't help, but feel that you've done this before in another life at another time.
"Oh my Celestia! Thank you so much! It's so difficult to get a cab in this city!"
>He pulls off again, eventually gaining a moderate amount of speed.
"Where to miss?"
>The Mare perks up, and points a hoof in front of her.
"The Bridleway theatre please. I hope you don't mind if I go first right? I'm really dragging plot this morning."
>You respond that it's alright, and logically ask what happened to her. Even though it's not your business, and I know as the Author you'd poke your green nose into her biz anyway.
>She starts smoothing out her blue shortcut mane with her forelegs, catching her breath.
"I work as a Bridleway dressmaker. I was up all night reading Mang--"
>She eyes you suspiciously.
"D-designing dresses..."
>Sure she was.
>You merely shrug, and sit back, enjoying the ride. It's not like you have to be at this place on time. You're just going out to fill out a job application after all.
"E-excuse me."
>The mare is trying to get your attention.
"You're Anonymous right? That "Hubmand" creature from earth?"
>You correct her error, and reply with a "more or less".
"I knew it! I read about you in my Doujins! You're so fascinating! Is it true you get larger, and stronger when you're angry, and fight dragons?"
>She read about you in her what?
>You say you've never fought a dragon, and you don't get angry. Also what did she say she read about you in?
1/2
>>26930980
"Th-the paper?"
>You ball up your lips, and sigh.
>These ponies are weird.
>Thup thup thup.
>You look back at the mare who seems to be thumping her forehead.
"Stupid..stupid!"
>She finally turns back to you with pleading eyes.
"I'm really sorry! I know I sound super weird right now! I j-just never met a Celebrity before...! Well outside of work."
>It feels good. Someone else is finally pouring pasta in front of you.
"My name is Coco."
>You shake her hoof, and introduce yourself, though she already knows who you are.
>She flashes a soft smile.
"I know this will sound even weirder, but I can't help but get this sense of Deja vu. Like we've done this before..Also a hospital comes to mind."
>Somewhere deep down you sweat bullets.
>M-must be her imagination.
"So do you live here now? Or are you visiting?"
>You tell her you moved to the city yesterday,and OH MY FUCKING GOD, HOW ARE YOU GOING TO FIND YOUR WAY HOME IF YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR ADDRESS.
"A-are you okay?"
>You nod with a forced smile.
>Coco tilts her head questioningly.
"I see. Welcome to Manehatten! City of dreams!"
>Too bad she's a half day late with the welcoming.
>Thinking about it now, if memory serves, her place was hiring. Perhaps you could change your mind about where to apply?
>>26931014
don't change your mind. sure she is cute, but flip flopping on a choice is rarely a good idea.
>>26931181
Heh heh. Are you a new player?
>>26931279
can't say. Just want to put my 2 cents out there.
>>26931014
I can't imagine it would hurt to apply there, but let's check out the restaurant first anyways. If things don't work out we could always double back to the theatre.
bempa
>>26931181
i'm actually going for this one
we just better stay with the gig we decide instead of changing last minute
each time we did that, we end up badly, and the last time we ended dead
coco
>>26931014
>Seeing Coco's concerned face fills you with determination.
>You're gonna go to this job!
>The cab slows down to a full stop in front of Bridleway.
"This is me."
>You smile, and tell Coco to have a nice day at work.
"Awe~ Thanks Anonymous! You too! I hope we meet again in this big city!"
>You stoically reply if fate deems it so.Then tip your fedora like a dapper gentleman,
>She giggles, climbing out of the cab, waving to you as you pull off to your destination.
>That was a nice girl. Not as shiny, or feminine as G.S, but she had her own charm.
>A few minutes of taking in the sights, and you arrived at the acclaimed Four Star Fine Dining establishment known "Beta Carotene",
>You climb out of the carriage, the stallion driver snickers in your direction.
"Heh. Have fun chum."
>You cock an eye as he trots off.
>What the fuck could that possibly mean?
>You disregard his comment, and head into the large black, tinted window building filled with confidence, and optimism.
>Inside it's dimly lit, and a faint aroma of vegetable stock wafts in the air.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3_tw44QsZQ
>Now that's some dank jazz my nigga.
"Can I help you?"
>A mare in a black suit stands behind a booth eyeing you.
>You tell her you're here for a job.
"You? You're trying to work HERE?"
>You repeat that "Yes. You're applying to work HERE."
>Fucking bitch.
"AHUH. I don't think you're Beta Carotene material sir. Perhaps it's best if you just head on home.."
>What? What did she mean by this?
>You ask her to elaborate.
>She frowns like your question is a huge inconvenience.
"You're just a bit..."underdeveloped" for this job position sir. Please understand, you have to be of a certain ilk to work here."
>That's awfully vague.
>You ask to speak to a manager.
>She rolls her eyes.
"If that's what you want, but she'll just tell you the same thing."
>The mare climbs off her stool behind the booth, and heads further into the Dining room leaving you there, fuming.
1/
>>26932804
>After a few scant minutes, the mare returns with a more statuesque unicorn.
"Is he the one CeeTee Oh-Cee?"
>Is that her name?
>She nods, with a scowl.
"I tried to send him away mistress Fleur, but he was insistent on staying here!"
>The Unicorn holds up a hoof silencing her.
"You. Tall one. Come with me."
>She walks off, not even looking back to see if you're following. She doesn't have to look back though. Of course you're gonna follow,
>She leads you to a secluded table in the back of the room, magically pulling out a seat for you.
>Thanking her, you sit across from the regal Pony.
"So. You want to work here."
>You nod.
"Do you know what your job would be? What is required of you?"
>You scratch your head, and admit you merely skimmed the offer, but you worked for plenty of places like this back home.
"Ah. I thought I recognized you. You're that Hue-mang thing from the papers."
>Human. But she's more or less correct.
>She folds her hooves over one another.
"If you want to work for me You have to be able to fulfil each and every customers Order without question. It requires stamina, and dedication to do what is needed without second thoughts. Can you do that?"
>You nod.
"If I give you this chance, you must never question orders. You aren't even allowed to think twice about quitting this job Hue-Mang. This job will become an integral part of your life. Tradition that will be woven into your very being! CAN YOU DO IT?!"
>You flex your muscles getting pumped unnecessarily.
>JUST DO IT.
>MAKE YOUR DREAMS REALITY!
>JUST DO IT!
>You stand up, and pose like Shia Lebouf.
"YEA! GET HYPE! GET HYPE BOO!!"
>She hops on the table, and leaps into your arms.
>You roar, cradling her.
>Wait. What the hell is going on?
>Fleur stops also, blinking confused.
"Whoa. Deja Vu."
>She clears her throat turning a light pink.
"F-forgive my outburst. I lost myself for a moment there."
>You apologize as well, and put her back on the ground.
2/3
>>26932919
>After an awkward pause, and some odd looks from the staff, Fleur clears her throat.
"S-so! I've decided to give you a chance. Congratz."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YCN-a0NsNk
>You want to freeze frame victory fist pump in the air, but Fleur isn't done yet.
>She clops her hooves with an elegant smile, taking her seat once more.
"As part of tradition, you must have a drink with the boss."
>You ask if it isn't a little too early to start hitting the bottle?
>She chuckles.
"Perish the thought. This isn't alcoholic...what was your name again?"
>Anonymous.
"Right. Anonymous. This isn't an alcoholic beverage. It's a mixture of vegetables and fruits, with the primary ingredient" being of course our namesake."
>CeeTee approaches your table with a bottle, and two glasses.
>You sit down, as CeeTee places the items down before the two of you, asking what the name of the drink is.
"Why it's a Spearmint,Honeycomb,Carrot,Raspberry blend."
>She pours a portion for the both of you, sliding your glass to you, and holds hers up.
"A toast, to new help, and bright futures."
>>26933004
Why do I feel apprehensive?
>>26933155
that's a fear reflex. it's a good thing.
>>26933004
If i wasn't in my phone, checking one last time before sleep, i post the "i don't know why, but i feel my asshole is in danger" pic.
Fake the drinking. When she isn't looking, throw it in a plant or something. If she offers more, kindly say you had enough
>>26933004
Good god man, don't do it. We know how this turns out.
Let's just down it. We don't wanna break tradition in front of our new boss
come on, we don't want to disappoint out new boss just yet do we? Let's take it to the head.
>>26933268
This. Let's enjoy ourselves for once
What could go wrong?Well besides waking up hours later with a butt crammed full of carrots.
>>26933338
last time we blacked out, we were the one cramming stuff into butts.
>>26933338
Absolutely nothing. It's just a harmless drink. Pretend it's Mountain Dew
>>26933338
>that
>wrong
Anon. I
>>26933367
>>26933376
Honestly when it comes to ponies you can't really go wrong with butt stuff.
>>26933004
Did you really have to hit us with the S.H.C.R. this early?
>>26933684
That's the issue dude. it feels too early too be a trap.
>>26933722
I still don't trust it.
>>26933747
Oh not at all, but eh. it'll be fun at best, and horrible at worst.
>>26933684
It's never too early to get invited your usual sweet honeyed iced tea; it is to be expected though. We already got hints from the cab driver, which we ignored.
Then again, the fact that it's a public placeand the not-misleading filenameis any indicator that we're misled into thinking it's a trap-- screw it, I'm one for politely declining the drinkeven if I was a fleurfag from the previous run
>>26933004
Drink it as a sign of good faith to your new employer.
bampChug it nigga
>>26933004
Fug it, Chug it.
Bed time bump.
>>26933684
SHCR? Should that mean something?
>>26935575
It's a reference to the 3rd runacronym for shocker, which was a really strong drink that knocked out a lightweight anon, the rest is history...
>>26935627
Let's drink. It's a public setting, and I doubt anything would happen
>>26933722
>Too early to be a trap
Do you even?
>>26935627
For SHCR to be an acronym, each letter would be the first letter of a word that describes the object or idea in question. I think what you mean is abbreviation, since you shrunk down the word whilst retaining the original meaning.
>>26933722
>>26935749
Yes. This can only end well.
>>26933722
If it was any other CYOA, then yes. But it's The Lamentations of Suri Polomare where everything is trying to fuck your shit up.
>>26935944
Not going to lie dude. I'm no stranger to being wrong, but i'm not thinking feekling this being a ruse, too obvious at this point. feels like a bait and switch.
>>26936141
Not everything, just most.. ya know.
>tfw probably have to wait another couple hours before Schwartz comes back
The suspense is killing me man, I can't handle this.
>>26936559
shhh, enjoy it. the quiet before the storm.
>>26936559
nah man. I'm here counting votes. It seems you're all still undecided. I'll make a poll in a second.
http://strawpoll.me/7237740
another one man raid going on.
>>26936953
This guy is persistent.
>>26937026
Nope, one of the votes was me. I want to see him drink it.
>>26937159
What are you talking about?
We're talking about the guy spamming the board with the Cadence Op and "SCRUFFY IS A FAGGOT WHO HATES FUN", not the strawpoll.
>>26937159
Oh I thought we were talking about the strawpoll, sorry. i haven't actually been on the catalog for /mlp/ today.
So I'll do ten more minutes before I start. Looks like it's a landslide though
> Mfw everyone drinks
>>26933004
>You clink glasses, and down the juice.
>It's pretty tangy, with a hint of mint. Not bad.
>Fleur finishes hers off with a lick of the lips.
"Delicious isn't it? Have another!"
>She refills your glass, and you guzzle it down like kool-aid.
>You have a nice warm feeling all over your body. it's really juice.
>Why did you think it was anything else?
>It was almost like this was some type of trick or something that would have you end up in some precarious position, or being molested by horses or something.
"So what do you think?"
>You say it's pretty good, and ask where she got it.
"I have an ex-coltfriend who dabbled in potion making, and alchemy who taught me the recipe."
>You begin sipping a new glass.
"It's also something of a "binding contract","
>That's understanda-what?
"Let's drop the formalities okay?"
>Fleur seems to do a total 180 in personality, levitating out a pack of cigs, lighting one up.
>You're starting to get scared. Did she poison you?
"Listen. This is a restaurant, but that's a front papi. Beta Carotene is actually one of the top BDSM clubs in all of Equerstria."
>You spittake.
>BDSM?! OOOH HOH HOH NO.
>ANON DON'T DO THAT FITTY SHADES OF GRAY SHIT.
>As you open your mouth to protest, you find nothing comes out.
"That's what the juice you drunk ensures. Once ingested, you cannot speak of this place even in idle conversation. It protects the employees, and clientèle."
>You start panicking, clutching your throat. What did you just sign up for?!
>She takes a drag, and puffs it out in little hoops.
"Now, we're not insane or any crap like that boo. If you wanna leave, go for it. You'll be missing out on some good dosh though."
>You cock an eye at "dosh",
>What exactly would she have you do?
"I see I got your attention. Come with me then."
>You gulp, as she gets up, and sensually trots into the kitchen.
>The staff all eye you, as you follow her through the prep counters, and stoves, into the meat locker.
>A meat locker?
>>26937772
>BDSM
uhh
well that's not MY fetish, but money is money. Frankly I'd be seriously considering NOPEing out of there and pursuing other angles, but if the work is fairly harmless I don't see a huge problem. Let's hear her out?
![[heavy breathing intensifies].png](https://i.imgur.com/GhEO8K7.png "[heavy breathing intensifies].png")
>>26937772
>It's actually a secret stairway to a hidden basement.
>You can hear whipping, and moans of pleasure as you descend lower, and lower.
>Maybe the juice is doing something to you, but you can feel your pants getting tighter.
"If you choose to keep working here, you'll be what the ad said. A "Waiter". In various senses of the word. I have lots of Ponies(and some Griffons) in need of a special kind of love. A type of love some fancy vegetables boiled, or fried can't give."
>You reach the end of the staircase, and come to a red hallway with cushioned doors.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8dMluK-7E4
>You hear shouts, and more whipping noises, and a few mechanical screeches.
>A Stallion in a gimp suit is chained to the wall, muffling ineligible sounds.
"That's where you come in."
>You ask if you have to have sex with anyone."
"Nah. I'm no pimp. Not in that sense anyway papi~"
>She winks at you.
"All you'll really do is a paddle here. Turn on a "Mud ravager" machine here, and there--"
>What the fuck is a "Mud Ravager".
>You follow her into a giant room, where you see scantily clad mares dancing on poles, and in cages. Some stallions are getting spanked, and others are licking the hooves of what you assume are Beta Carotene workers in the corner.
>What is this shit..
"Welcome to my masterpiece. Impressive no?"
>You gulp again.
>Something tugs at your leg.
>You look down, and find a Mint colored unicorn trying to get your attention.
"H-hello Anonymous! D-d-d-d-do you work here?"
>It's not odd that some strange horses know your name. It's odd for them to come to you and just start talking though.
>You, and Fleur exchange looks.
>The mint pony lays on her back, and spreads her hind legs.
"C-c-c-c-could you step on my vagina?!"
>THE FUCK?!
>In a uncharacteristic bout of rage, and you punch her straight in the snizz.
"OOOOH YEAH!"
>UGH. Your fist is soaked.
"See? You're a natural!"
2/3
>>26937810
fuck that. money is money, but we have to get our dignity as well
i'm not planning in becoming a guy who someday will dress with only a leothard, a few hand-cuffs, and a leather mask and talk about the fetishes of the people, and how "i make their fetish" real
>>26937772
when she is done with the interview, say no thanks, and get the job at the teather
>>26937772
>Meat locker
Oh no i know where this is going
I'm liking this place already.
>>26937874
dear god, this can't go anywhere good.
Tell Fleur she needs to find jesus and then we gots to vamoose.
>>26937874
uh oh unfolding. better politely nope the fuck outta here. consider getting this job when we have absolutely no other options left.
>>26937874Disregard that "And" with the snizz part. Typing too fast again
>Fleur grins at you cutely, and motions for you to continue on as Saint's Row music plays in the background.
>The slender unicorn leads you to another room, an office it seems, and closes the door behind you.
"So? Thoughts?"
>It's a freaky, sick den of sin, and fuckboyishness. The floors are sticky, like someone spilled pop all over them, but you know it's not pop. Probably.
>But you won't say that.
"One thing I'll mention, since I'm sure you have some "concerns"."
>You rub the back of your head.
"We have a "No means No" policy here. My employees have the right to refuse any form of clothing offensive to them or kink they aren't okay with. As a waiter you'll merely provide the supplies; not get engaged personally unless requested of course. Also considering your size, I could see myself paying you double to keep out riff raff~"
>You ask if you have to wear chaps or mankini's.
"Only if you want papi~ I won't complain."
>You sit there and think.
>Could you put up with watching horses get banged or whatever weird shit they're into? It's not like you have to do it or anything..
>She butterfly kisses at you.
"Well? Do you want the job boo?"
>>26937973
no, i have a theather audition now
>>26937973
I say we stay. we're essentially a bouncer for a freaky club. plus who knows who might turn up?
>>26937928
It's not like Anon'll be on the receiving end, and he's the one setting the limits.
The only bad thing is the possibility of seeing ponies that he'll know. But I have a feeling that they all drink the elixir as well, so no one will be snitching.
>>26937973
To be fair, that's pretty easy money if you're open to kinks, and my assumption was right about limits. Also, we're a bouncer for these little ponies. I say take it.
But I think I may be outvoted.
>>26938016
>inb4 Luna shows up in a disguise
>>26938043
>In before the disguise is a tiny moustache and a hat
>>26937973
Well, it's not a ruse at the very least. Allthings considered since we have a guaranteed job, and we're not going to be required to fucking anyone, or anything unless we say yes, plus it sounds like we may be able to get away with just being muscle most of the time. My original concern was being basically a sex mule, but this is doable. I'd say take the job and we'll see how things work out from there.
>>26938043
Everyone has to drink it.
I wanna snatch bash mares
>>26937973
If our job is just being a bouncer then it's kinda OK, I guess. But I would consider some other options first before making the final decision.
>>26938110
The job is a "waiter"
>>26938150
basically dildo deliveryman.
So how are we gonna woo Fleur?
>>26938282
with time and patience. or not at all. or poorly. it depends.
>>26938282
Please, let's not do it.
>>26938282
We aren't, she's our boss dumdum.
not that that's stopped us before, but still.
>>26938282
no
we'll work as a normal bouncer.
the only thing we have to do is being calm, take enough juice to not talk, but not be mute for life, and finally, just be a delivery boy. if they need an extra dildo or lube, they'll have it. but we are out of reach
>>26938327
>she's our boss
>Had sex with our boss in two different runs
>>26938370
>not that that's stopped us before, but still.
>>26938332
We're not a bouncer you tard, we're a waiter
>>26938397
She said she'd pay us double since she could also use us as a bouncer, we can just try to do that more often than not.
>>26938406
>implying these ponies getting fucked are gonna actually cause trouble
M8. This is a ride. We all just wanna get off
>>26938475
I'm really not seeing any huge downsides to the job. We can say NO to customer's requests if we want to, we get paid, and we're large enough to be intimidating . All we gotta do is move shit and occasionally look mean. Sounds pretty good to me, and again since this is Schwartz, and everything has been ruse free this seems like a safe option. Why would we risk that?
http://strawpoll.me/7239834
>>26938529
>Fucking the boss
And here we go again.
>>26938529
we're so fucked
>>26938529
>16 votes already
>9 for bend fleur over the table and fuck her
what the fuck?
>>26938529
Are you shitting me? Where are these horny fucks coming from? Why is just dropping our pants and fucking fleur right here and now even being considered?
>>26938577
Because people like to ruin things.
Unf. Fuck her hard, and put a ball gag in her mouth
>>26938529
>all these thirsty as fuck morons making stupid choices
gj guys
>>26938529
I should really start looking for Babs daughter potential elsewhere.
Nothing left to do but sit back and watch the carrots and spaghetti fly.
Non-ruse poll. Sorry guys. That was me fucking with you
http://strawpoll.me/7240064
>>26938529
>45 total votes
seriously, where are these people coming from. We have ten people at tops reply and making suggestions usually, then suddenly we explode to 45? I call bullshit, especially since there's only 36 unique posters in the thread.
>>26938702
Schwartz you bastard, nearly had me pulling my hair out.
>>26938282
We aren't. It's quite obvious we're going down the Harem route for this one.Also known as the only happy end in a dating sim like this
>>26939033
harems are for people who can't make up their mind Anon.
Are you saying you're a flipper flopper?
>>26939208
Harems are for people with big dicks anon.
You've got a big dick, right?
>>26939237
How can you decide whether your dick is big, if you can't even decide on a single grill?
>>26939267
>how can you decide whether your dick is big
I wasn't aware I had any say in the matter.
>>26939271
Size, like sexual assault subjective
>>26938716
"is" subjective.
Pardon my poor grammar.
>>26939292
I think any girl can recognize that your two inch pecker is a joke anon.
>>26939305
>2 inches.
More like 3.5.
and besides, if the girl loves you she'll only cheat behind your back.
>>26939237
>he's new to a Schwartzanigger CYOA
>>26937973
>You take her hoof, and shake it.
"Sweet deal! You can start right now. It's getting close to Hearts and hooves, so that means a lot of lonely ponies are flooding in for some loving. See how you can help out, and always--"
>She ducks under a table, and pulls out a silver tray.
"Always carry one of these with you. It's basically a "Don't touch me unless I say so" type of thing."
>You weren't expecting to start immediately, but the sooner you can make some cash the better.
>You take the tray, and stand up.
"You already look like you've been here for ages. Now get your sexy hind out there, and do your job papi!"
>Fleur winks at you again.
>You head out in your suit, holding your silver tray like a legitimate waiter. You feel proud to have gotten a job so fast.
>Or you would feel proud if there wasn't a stallion getting his ponut pounded by a mare with a strap-on a few feet away.
>Fucking Numales.
>You stroll the floor checking out the scene, seeing things that either disgust you, or plain out confuse you.
"A-a-a-a-a-a-a-anonymous!"
>That unicorn is back.
"W-would you like to help me with s-s-something?"
>You tell her not really. Your hand is sticky from her punchedgasm.
"P-Please? Just one more jab? It felt s-s-sooooooo good."
>Fucking horndog degenerate.
>You bite your lip, as she exposes her winking snatch to you.
>Fist clenched, you uppercut her in the clitoris with all the fury you can muster, and repressed rage from when a certain pony would visit the castle trying to guess your fetishes.
"OOUUUOOHHHHOOOO!"
>Splash.
>You swear loudly as a tidal wave of listerine washes over your entire body.
>That orgasm was more exaggerated than a Chinese cartoon hentai.
>The mare collapses into a heap of hot, and bothered horse, as you stand there looking like Nickolodeon just slimed you.
"Oh my Celestia...Anonymous?"
>You look to who called you out, and find G.S clad in bondage gear.
"What the heck are you doing here?!"
1/2
>>26939687
>The mare collapses into a heap of hot, and bothered horse, as you stand there looking like Nickolodeon just slimed you.
hehehe
>>26939687
>You sputter out that you work there, and express some shock that she works there.
"Wow guy. I was actually gonna bring you here after work today. Never did I think you'd get a job here!"
>G.S was gonna bring you to this fuck den?!
>She snickers looking at you.
"So..L-looks like you had a wild time with ol faithful there, huh?"
>You frown, and say you need a change of clothes.
"Why not just get naked? We're all friends here."
>You'd prefer not having some kinky Stallion, or over enthusiastic Mare with a dildo to go spelunking in your tunnel of love, if you happen to bend over to pick up a bit or something.
"Well, if you don't wanna have fun or anything...fine. Come with me. I'll find you something guy."
>You follow G.S, squishing all the while(shit flowed into your shoes. Fucking yuck) to what appears to be an employee locker room.
>You see a few beautiful mares chatting in the shower or putting on makeup.
"We used to have some Minotaur working here. They quit because their hulking size, and tiny dongs angered most customers. Funny right? Who figured something so big was packing baby corn?"
>You feel weird in a room full of females, and G.S talking about dicks so casually in front of you.
>Another thing bothering you is, G.S appears to be wearing a codpiece. Can girls wear codpieces?
>You're lead to a locker that says "Steel Bill" on the front.
>Sounds familiar.
>She opens the locker, and inside are...No...NOPENOPENOPENOPE.
>Inside is a Mankini and a fucking Banana Hammock that says "Peanut butter jelly time".
"Take your pick handsome."
It's mandatory to pick one as it determines the available waifu choices
>>26939687
Oh boy, here we go.
banana hammock
https://youtu.be/lhh2RVwU5ms?t=46
>>26939794
Green + green = MORE GREEN! In other words, mankini.
>>26939794
I'm just gonna sit this one out and see how it goes.
>>26939794
Uhhhh
Mankini?
Could we just go buck wild instead, somehow I imagine that will be less embarrassing.and of course glitter works, goddamn
>>26939954
mankini.
also we have to pick one friendo
we do have some shame.
>>26939978
I know what a mankind is, I was saying that would be my choice between the two but that streaking might be less embarrassing.
>>26940031
>mankind
>>26940031
Get lost degenerate
>>26939794
>mankini
use the green one, and just give thumbs up
that was for you borat
http://strawpoll.me/7241935
>>26940112
Autocorrected mankini
>>26940124
You first gayboi
>niggas want to wear a banana hammock
You all gay
>>26940588
The banana hammock is winning?!?
Bananas be praised
>>26939794
>Goddammit.
>You pick the banana hammock, though you probably would have been better off naked.
"Excellent choice guy. Go ahead, and get changed, and I'll toss those rags in the wash."
>Rags? Fuck her.
>As you start to disrobe, you notice G.S staring intently at you.
>You ask if she can give you some privacy.
"Why? We're all guys here! You don't have nothing I ain't never seen before~"
>You ask if she's seen human cock before.
"N-no, but I assume it has a sheathe, and head, and two sets of balls?"
>Why do you guys want to date this pony again?
>You swear to yourself, and strip down to your birthday suit, reaching for what you hope is a clean Nanner hammock.
>This is so embarrassing.
"Hey. Nice butt. I could do some things to it~"
>You frown at G.S who breaks out into rabid laughter.
"Oh chill out. It's your first day, so I'll show you the ropes. What position did you fill out for?"
>You reply "Waiter" as you pick out a wedgie.
"Waiter? You should be a server. All the sex you could possibly ask for, with none of the strings attached!"
>You say you're more of a "fall in love" type of guy.
"Love? Love is just a silly concept lonely people came up with to excuse their inability to give in to their inhibitions."
>G.S's face goes surprisingly somber.
>Lockers opening, and closing with assorted chatter fills the suddenly tense space between you.
>G.S takes your clothes under her hoof, looking away.
"A-anyway, I'll get these set up to be cleaned for you."
>You thank her, as she scampers out of the room leaving you there dressed in--
>You know what it is. I hope you're happy.
>You sit on a bench waiting for your friend to come back, when a Griffon in shades enters.
"Sup."
>You nod to him.
>He has a gym bag latched to him that he proceeds to empty various bottles and clothing from in front of a random locker.
"How's it going bruh?"
>You tell him "fine",
"First day?"
>You nod again, as he lathers baby oil on his feathers.
"Names Borad. "Borad the Bandito"."
1/
>>26941135
>we're all guys here
Anon, pick up on subtleties you silly billy
>>26941135
>You meekly sputter out your name.
"Coo. You a server? Or a Chef?"
>You tell him you're a waiter.
"Pfft. That's a beta job brah. Only wimps who can't handle all that sweet Mare poon go for the waiter job."
>Fucking Chad.
>You decide to stop talking to him.
>Just in time too. G.S returns hanging her head.
"Yo. Glitter! Sup dawg! Getting that sweet strange tamed bro?"
>Glitter? Is that her name?
>Glitter shushes the bandito loudly.
"We don't use that name here! Remember?"
>The griffon puts his mankini on with a loud "SNAP" of his straps.
"No need to harsh out bruh. It's all coolios."
>He shoves his bottles and bag into the locker, before leaving the locker room.
>Glitter scowls at him on his way out.
"D-don't ask...just follow me."
>You shrug, and do as she asks.
"First things, first. Get your tray."
>Oh right! You pick it up, and notice a red "STOP" under it.
>Guess that's what Fleur meant.
"Keep that with you at all times guy, or there's no telling who'll strip you naked, and have their way with you. I may be tempted to get some of that myself if the mood is right."
>Glitter smirks at you.
>Y-you too...
>You ask what Borad's role is here.
"He's a Server. Like me. We basically take care of the more hoofs on customers."
>You ask what type of things involve a "hoofs on" approach.
"You know. Ruttin. Suckin. The usual. Well Not Borad. He's so in the closet, but I know I saw him getting it on with some stallion that looked like this Pink horse I know in Ponyville the other night."
>Pink horse in ponyville...?
"Anyway that doesn't matter. All you really have to do is assist servers, and maybe a Chef or two."
>What's a chef?
"You DON'T want to know. Those guys handle the more extreme cases. Also, you didn't hear this from me, but Fleur is a former Chef. She's a real firecracker in the sheets I hear."
>Good to know? It's not like you plan on romancing her as an apology for yelling at her in the hospital while she was encased in a changeling cocoon.
2/
>>26941248
THE VISIONS, THEY ARE UNYIELDING!
>>26941248
>That would just be silly. Almost as silly as having intercourse with a doppleganger of her, but never giving her some. That'd just make you a heartless piece of crap!
>Glitter leads you to a closet, where inside is a range of Dildos, and other toys. It smells like boiled collard greens inside.
>You cover your nose.
"Smells nice doesn't it? That's the smell of pony insides guy. Really turns me on..."
>Glitter bites her lips, before placing various sized marital aides on your tray.
"Okay you're all set. come with me."
>You ask where to, feeling your buttcheeks clench unconsciously.
"On the job training, duh. Don't worry. You're just observing for now."
>Maybe this job was a mistake...
>You hear more whipping, and moans echoing from down the hall you, and Glitter head down to a velvet door with the number "6" on the front.
"You ready newbie?"
>You gulp and nod.
>On an unrelated note, your feet are sticking to the ground. You'd kill for some sanitizer right now.
>You follow Glitter into another dimly lit room where a Unicorn lays blindfolded, and bound on a bed.
"H-hello? Who's there."
>Her tone is so flat, and monotone. Reminds you of Raven from the Teen Titans.
"Okay newbie. Watch how it's done."
>Glitter undoes her codpiece, letting her floppy dick fall out, and--
>.........
>.........
>Something should be registering in your brain right now, but for the life of you, you can't figure out what.
>You blink a few times in silence, as Glitter starts smacking the mare with her--His(?) meat.
"You like that slave? Beg for it!"
>Uhhhhh.
"Y-yes master. I love it. Choke me with your enormous girth."
>........
"Okay Newbie, Do me a favor, and shove that long purple one up my butt. I can't get up without some stimulation."
>.......
>Seeing Glitter's ponut leaves you UNDETERMINED.
