It's...this thing!
http://pastebin.com/Pu749mrT
>>26804191
With a magnificent flash of white our villains find themselves in a strange land.... These villians are
(Sheets)
>>26804216
http://pastebin.com/hirneSC9
I found his theme song, finally
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYSDC3cHoZs
>>26804216
http://pastebin.com/8V88tWpt
(reminder: not dressed as/using the disguise of Dreadjaw. Still a female sharkpone in a fancy blue dress and seashell earings/jewelry)
>>26804216
http://pastebin.com/RfLjWSv4
>>26804368
>>26804302
>>26804283
After the flash of light, our villains find themselves on a grassy plain. The convention is not in sight. Nor, for that matter is the city.And so, with little else to do, they get to what is most important, assigning blame.
>>26804191
http://pastebin.com/jcMX0UiQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoXxuae8wIU
Oh shit.
>>26804425
hm, well... I guess I'm l8 then.
>>26804419
>>26804283
>>26804368
After looking around, and seeing she seems to be in bumfuck nowhere, Dreadjaw growls a bit and looks at TADS and Kero.
"Alr-r-r-right! Which one of ye lubberrrrs did this?!"
>>26804419
''DREADJAW WHAT DID YOU DO THIS TIME?''
>>26804451
''What?! What you mean 'which one of ye' you meat-munching sea pig? It is clear that you did it!...Whatever it is that you did!''
>>26804498
"Like bilge waterrrr I did, ye daft goat! Ye werrrre the one messin' with that chairrrr thing-a-ma-jig!"
"And what be wr-r-r-rong with eating meat? It makes ye big and str-r-r-rong, like me. So ye can take big hauls like this around," Dreadjaw says, showing off the tesla coil device she yoinked from the convention.
>>26804419
>>26804451
>>26804498
TADS points a katana at the the two bickering villains,
"Hey, stop bickering you two."
He then realizes he's holding a weapon he had never used before, also noticing a black bandana with some kinda foreign language on it. He removes both of them (These will later confuse archeologists of the area, finding Japonese artifacts all the way out in Eustirrup).
"I pressed that big fucking button, a'ight? Was totally destroying that science ninja, just thought it would be some kinda cool weapon I could use to finish the job."
He looks around,
"Where are we?"
>>26804585
Cerulean, instinctively, growls at the weapon wielding TADS until he tosses it aside.
"Somewhere with gr-r-r-rass," she says, the pirate accent fading away as she calms down.
"So not someplace a bunch of science nerds would want to be."
>>26804653
"Soooo... walk till we find something to steal?"
>>26804676
Cerulean shrugs.
"Looting, fighting, gener-r-r-ral mayhem. All sounds good to me."
>>26804536
''The device I was TRYING to operate wouldn't do something like this. And eating meat is fine BUT NOT WHEN IT IS DEEP FRIED IN OILY FAT''
>>26804585
''Oh...You...Pressed the button? That button?? the big red deliciously shining one???''
>>26804653
>>26804676
''I doubt there is even much to loot or mayhem to be done here...I don't see Anypony or anything besides grass! what is the point of doing dastartdly deeds if there are no innocents to watch and cry?''
>>26804739
TADS shrugs,
"It's an addiction."
He starts walking in a random direction.
>>26804739
"But I like oily fat. You know how many whales and seals I had to catch for-r-r-r that opening day?"
Cerulean pauses,
"It was a lot. And I had to do it by myself, you little welp."
>>26804739
>>26804759
Dreadjaw watches TADS begin walking, then gives a sharky sigh.
"Guess we be goin' on a gr-r-r-rand quest for no-goodery."
At that, she begins to follow TADS in said direction.
>>26804773
''Do not. Eat. Whales nor seals... They are the worst, most damaging kind of living creatures that you can eat with the highest ratio of fat among any other living being!''
The goat bleats and nags on as she follows the other two
>>26804848
"But they're the tastiest! And I'm always swimming around, so not like I'm going to get fat in one feeding fr-r-r-renzy."
Cerulean leans close to Kero, looking almost hungry and predatory.
"Are you saying you're a healthier choice? You look pretty lean to me."
She then licks her teeth and grins.
>>26804886
>>26804848
>>26804759
As the villains continue to argue they notice two things.
First it appears that there is a large group of ponies, or perhaps goats? Marching in the distance. Perhaps some sort of band?
Also, more importantly, a large amount of crystal, which until now they had thought to be simply debris, is actually moving, and is, in fact, taking a pony like shape. What could this mysterious mass of minerals be? Is it Friend or foe?
>>26804886
''You say that because you are still just a little young lady, but are you sure you will stay like that in a few years? hmn?! Your blood won't pump as fast and not be able to move around as much as you do now and your arteries will start to get clogged with fat, then before you know BAM! There won't be any more shark attacks, only Carrrrrdiac attacks...''
''And of course I would be the most healthy choice. Even being of age, I could easily still teach you a good lesson if you don't behave. You filthy sea mutt''
>>26804995
Kero pays no attention to the minerals, she sees moving crystals on a daily basis
what does interests her, is the marching goats and ponies
She tries to sneak her way closer to this little gathering
[1d1]
"Cant canter close enough to cause Crystal conundrum."
I chant, looking in no particular direction.
>>26804995
"Wonder if those crystals are valuable... although I don't like moving loot."
He disappears, much more effective than Kero'mas.
>Vanish
>>26804995
>>26805055
I seem to be stuck in a loop, of sorts. my mind isn't ticking just correctly, the crystalline cranium on the cat seems to be cracked by a crossbow bolt.
>>26805033
"Ver-r-r-ry funny," Cerulean says with a roll of her eyes.
"And I be ver-r-r-ry sure I'll stay this way. I always be on the move, unlike some land barnacle."
Cerulean grins at Kero.
"Alr-r-r-right then. Then if we don't find something to eat, I guess I'll eat you first. Since you didn't seem to mind me looking at ye like a tasty meal."
>>26804995
Seeing the others go for the crystals, and remembering the crystal from the science thing, she decides to avoid them and look at the group of...whatever they are, and boldly begins walking towards them.
"Looks like ye be safe from me plate tonight, Ker-r-r-ro."
>>26805086
''Psh...Showoff...''
>>26805121
''Don't you even dare bare those yellowed teeths at me, Dreadjaw...But...If you are really sooo hungry, I think I can do something about that~'' She returns the grin with even more malice
>>26805086
>>26805033
Kero and TADS began to head to the group, which upon coming closer is a bunch of raindeer, who look likethe are some sort of medical reenactment festival. Like a bunch of vikings.
>>26805121
As dreadjaw approaches, the raindeer notice her, and begin to point and chat among themselves.
>>26805091
Also, the crystals are talking, someone really should consider this.
>>26805178
''Reindeer? here?...Did we got teleported into a renaissance fair?''
>>26805162
"Yellowed?!"
Cerulean quickly pulls her blade, but uses it like a mirror to inspect her teeth. As expected, they're still white and sharp.
"Don't scar-r-r-re me like that. I have a clean bill of health with these, and I plan on keeping it that way."
"Now, what was that about you fixing our food situation?" She asks, sounding genuinely curious what there is to eat and seemingly not picking up on the malice.
>>26805178
Cerulean notices their actions, and growls abit as she keeps coming closer.
"Hey! Where in the seas of Equestria ar-r-r-re we!" she yells at them.
>>26805235
She rolls her eyes, chuckling ''I made you look, you easily foolable fool!''
''And come talk to me 'later tonight' and I will gladly show you...Fuhuhuhuehehehe''
>>26805178
>>26805091
I never said where I was going, fool! TADS Checks out the crystalline creature from his invisibleness.
"What are you..."
He says out loud, albeit invisible
>>26805265
Cerulean growls a bit at the 'made ya look,' putting her blade away with a slight scowl.
"An evil dinner? Finally, something to look forwar-r-r-rd to."
>>26805273
"C-Con, Crystal Cyst, Com-Complete Control, c, can't c-concentrate.. Cant canter close enough to cause Crystal conundrum. Cant canter close enough to cause Crystal conundrum" curses; i lose control again, i am cantering in a ellipse, cause circles are for cunts.
>>26805309
''Wrong, a SUPER evil dinner... Please Dreadjaw, it's like you don't even know me''
>>26805312
TADS uncloaks, pulling the crossbow bolt out of the Crystal ...Thing's head.
"You alright there? That looked like it would hurt. Then again you're a gem."
He pauses, before asking,
"Are you valuable? Worth anything?"
>>26805348
"Same could be said about ye as well," Cerulean says, giving a bit of a cheeky/sharky grin.
>>26805384
''Oh I know enough about you...And trust me, there are some things I would rather not even know...'' the goat shudders
>>26805367
the crack fills, and my head clears for the first time in a century. fall back. landing on what used to be an anthill. in a moment, i realized my mistake. springing up, and running around shrieking about the potential germs and diseases from that soil, and it sickens you. when i get a hold of myself. i form into a much more, normal; equine form, albeit with no face. i tilt my head and look at you.
"currency, cost, for crystal?" i obviously don't know much about the equestrian language.
http://pastebin.com/0yRSF6PM (my sheet)
>>26805398
"Hmm...you know enough about me, even though we only see each other when sailing the seas of villainy? Ar-r-r-ren't you a gutsy one," Cerulean says grinning.
>>26805442
''Nothing stops us from seeing eachother when we are not causing mayhem, Dreadjaw''
>>26805431
>(TADS Is a unicorn wearing a black balaclava that depicts a white smiley face, as well as a black jumpsuit with hoof-gloves that complete covers any part of his body. He has a normal looking backpack on his back.)
TADS cocks his head, looking at the strange creature. He reaches into his backpack, pulling out a tiara made of crystal he stole.
"This kinda stuff, right?"
He puts it on thinking really hard, making the tiara project a holographic image of a comical bag of gold coins with a dollar sign on it,
"Could I steal you and make a decent profit?"
>>26805479
"Hrmm...this be tr-r-r-rue. Maybe I should stop me downtime plans and, I dunno, just causually sail ar-r-r-round with ye sometime. Guess even I need a br-r-r-reak from harrrrd work."
>>26805502
i look at the projection, and morph into a large crystalline version of the comical bag. with a ponies head popping out the top.
"can't comprehend currency; but crystal not sale..." i pause, and become a much more detailed version of myself, this time.. much... much hotter than before. "i deceive to get currency" i seem to have snapped out of my alliterative nature.
>>26805525
The goat's expression softens a little
''Perhaps I could even teach you actual recipees with fish so you can make the most out of what you catch even...''
>>26805573
TADS Squints his eyes,
"Alright... just follow me around. I'm sure I'll have some sort of use for you."
He beckons the crystalline creature to follow him, heading towards the group.
As the group continues to talk, the medieval rein-inactors approach, the largest doe approaches Cerulean.
"Forsooth,. I am Hasdolf the terror of ye north. Verily I have come to raid equestria. Kneel before me, shark-beast.
>>26805635
i follow, mumbling in an indecipherable, ancient tounge. "bohanot di-rai Nik'toh... tlaic'no-ci mirinah'un"
>>26805668
>>26805659
TADS walks up and hears the word 'raid'
"Woah, you guys are like villains and shit too? Sick, we're doing the same thing. We should join up, loot a city or something."
>>26805613
"Ehh...I not be on fer cooking unless it be quick," Cerulean says with a shrug, "and raw be the fastest I can think of."
There is another lick of the teeth at that thought.
>>26805659
Dreadjaw looks at the rein-inactor with a slight glare, clearly not kneeling before Hasdolf and rolls her eyes.
"R-r-r-right, like I'm going to kneel before some walking slab of venison."
She grins.
"But ye mention r-r-r-raiding. Wherrrre ye be pillaging? We be needing to let loose a bit of steam. Har harrrr."
>>26805691
at hearing the implications of a raid, i start excitedly jabbering synonyms to the word 'raid'
"pillage! Plunder! Loot! >rape"
>>26805707
"Yee vill not kneel. Then thyne head hall be cleaved from they body" The deer Cerulean you with shard, swinging it with all her might. The sword clashes against Cerulean, and shatters. The doe looks from her the broken sword to the unharmed shark-pony, eyes wide.
>>26805659
''Kneel? I don't think so friend...I think YOU should be the ones kneeling to the might DICKS instead!''
>>26805707
''Raw you say...hmn...I think I might have an idea...'' the goat strokes her furry chin
>>26805781
"So... still up for the whole raiding thing?"
>>26805781
"yes.... what he said"
>>26805808
also meant to add
>>26805789
>>26805786
The doe falls to her kneels. "YesI kneel. I did not know the gods had come upon us. Oh blessed ones, please forgive me."
>>26805789
"The gods would join us upon our assault?"
>>26805832
"no, no gods, gods are bad. bad are gods, loot, loot is good, we need loot. we get loot, no gods."
>>26805781
Cerulean looks at the sword shards, then back at the doe.
"Haaaaarrrrr har har har! What be that?! It felt like a tiny, little dogfish nibblin'! Or a gentle currrrr-r-r-rent against me!"
>>26805832
Dreadjaw grins, liking the sounds of being called a 'god.'
"Aye, we be more than happy to join yer little boarrrrding parrrrty. Just br-r-ring something betterrr than those flimsy butterrrrknives ye have."
For emphasis, Dreadjaw draws her dussage, giving a resounding, pirate laugh.
>>26805832
''...uh...Gods? Blessed ones? what are you going on about, little doe?''
>>26805832
"Sure, let's just get on with it. Which way to the nearest town? I haven't stolen anything for at least 10 minutes."
>>26805857
i dart back and fourth between >>26805858 and >>26805832 with no visible facial expression. probably due to my face not actually being my place of input.
>>26805893
i trot up to >>26805858 and look her in the eyes, and cock my head to the right. "pillager?"
>>26805886
>>26805870
>>26805858
Hasdolf the terror of ye north, looks rather confused, But seems to grasp that you would be down for some raiding. "FORSOOTHE, then we march to ye olde Border fortress, and smash the castle! To victory! We shall burn their castle, raid their treasury, and take their men!" With this she bangs her sheild and the others raiders follow with banging of their own.
*Note at any time from now on you may include "SKIP" to proceed to the raid, Once everyone is ready the raid will commence.
>>26805936
SKIPidee doodah, SKIPidee day, TADS has nothing much more to say.
>>26805936
i form into a diamond dog shape. and ready some trap materials, making somepony else take it, as i would never touch such disease ridden objects. i start walking alongside the other villans.
>>26805893
>>26805913
Cerulean backs off a bit.
"Woah, the in the Davy Joneses ye be?!"
At hearing the question, Dreadjaw wags a hoof.
"Not JUST a pillager. A Pir-r-r-rate."
>>26805936
"Sounds like a good Saturday night to me, lass!" Dreadjaw exclaims happily, looking excited to get back into the thick of things.
"Got a change of clothes on ye? Me pillaging clothes be back home."
>SKIP
>>26806012
i turn to the mare. "pirate... baid dru'gg; you get more pillage?
at the first question i amorphise to my large, golem like appearance. "i building material" i say in no particular way.
>>26806054
SKIP
>>26806054
"Yup. I be going to get more looting! And ye be coming with us, it looks like."
Cerulean raises an eyebrow.
"Well yer gonna have to give up that honest life style. Ye be with us now."
She points towards the town they're off to pillage.
"Let's go, landlubberrrr; time to loot some whelps!"
>>26806119
>>26806067
>>26805995
>>26806012
Siege of Ye Olde Border fortes:
You are helping to siege the Border fortress. It's a nice fortress, thick stone walls, a drawbridge and moat, even a central keep. Inside the Fortress are
2 groups of yeoman
1 group of knights
The vikings will be supporting you, though as long as the forts walls are up, they won't be able to get in except by ladder, so will come in a little at a time.
---
There aren't any other tricks, as this is intended to be a simple scenario to allow familiarity with the system.
>>26806142
"i... sword... protect" i shout loudly, as i turn to a large 30 rung ladder up the side of the forte.
>>26806142
"Go Go Gadget Cannon!"
TADS Shouts, taking out his lil' brick gundam and his leftover legos.
"Sorry friend, you're needed in another form."
He salutes the gundam, before constructing a cannon out of the lego bricks, firing it off at the stone walls the Crystal is not next to. Multiple entrances equals strategy!
>1VP to use gadget.
>>26806142
Dreadjaw cracks her neck a bit, grinning at being told the strategy.
"Time to make an entrance."
She begins to run at the fortress, building up speed and launching herself at the stone walls like some sort of tankflesh-torpedo, using her tail to cushion some of the impact on her head.
After impacting the wall, she leaps backwards and into the moat before she gets retaliated upon.
>Slam on the stone walls
>Crits 8+, DC -1 from Charge+Single tag, is a ranged attack and gets +1
[1d10+1]
>jumping into moat after attack on wall to remain 'out of melee range'
>>26806174
well. shit, can i get the combat rulebook here DM?
>>26806196
The ladder is put by the wall, as several vikings swarm it.
>>26806174
The wall explode, and vikings swarm in.
>>26806156
You burst in the walls like the cool-aid-man, before getting out.
The vikings rush in, charging the yeoman [1d10-2]
While the Yeoman fight back.
[1d10-1]
[1d10-1]
The Knights join the melee.
[1d10]
>>26806220
The meele is mostly shoving, and pulling, but the yeoman managed to do good work, driving the vikings back.
-----
Crystal, we use a "dicebot" roller which you can find under the pastebin like at the top of the thread, to roll for an action use [Number of dice"d"type of die]
so 1 ten sided die is [1d10]
>>26806254
what about specials? sorry but I'm a bum-fucked newfag to this /tg/ combat
>>26806273
can i >whirlwind [1d10]
>>26806273
Specials cane take two forms.
1)A unique attack that does something different, in which case simply roll d10, only a success will have the new effect.
2) Modifying the roll, to modify a roll use plus or minus afte rthe roll, like so
[1d10+2] to add 2 to a roll
>>26806295
okay, then >>26806286 is technically a viable attack, then.
>>26806254
TADS Disappears, stabbing a Knight from behind with his switchblade
[1d10+1] autocrit from stealth
>>26806286
Yes, that works. Though since you are fighting groups, whirlwhind (an aoe), Works differently, it can only hit one group, but it does so at +3. You rolled a 9, so 9+3 will be 12, which is a very good roll. I'll describe the dmg it did once everyone else had made their rolls as well.
>>26806333
well. shit. i mean "GET DISENFECTED"
>>26806314
>>26806348
No,it's good, also don't worry about groups, they are a unique thing to this campaign. Normally all enemies are simply individuals. But since you are supervillians, normal enemies arn't worth you time, hence only groups or superheroes can remotly threaten you. So it's something unique.
>>26806357
that was an impressed "shit" f4m.
>>26806220
Cerulean leaps up from the moat, her dress completely soaked now, but still rushes into the fight. She grins, snaps her jaws a few times, but proceeds to-what? We can't show her chomping down on several mooks? Too violent? She's a shark! They're supposed-...okay okay, fine. We'll find some way to tone it down.
Anyway...snapping her jaws, Dreadjaw goes up to the group of knights, snatches a prey in her jaws, and tosses said victim into another of the group. She proceeds to do this a few times, moving quickly to avoid anything attempting to hit her back.
>Cleave the group of Knights, gets +3 right?
>Counted as Ranged and Single as well, DC -1 and +1
[1d10+4]
>>26806286
Crystal Cat jumps into the fray, shedding it's pony for in order ot transform into a living tornado of crystal, it falls upon the yeomares, destroying one group.
"Wow. Look at those defiantly not dead and only unconscious yeomares" Says Hasdolf the terror of ye north. Insuring that the censors won't get angry at the poor comic writer.
>>26806314
TADS moves forward, stabbing the unaware knight and-
---
"We can't have him do that."
"Why not?"
"Because we are showing off the new villain this issue, and you just had him beat the yeomares, how would it look if the new villain beat the yeomares, and our old ones beat tougher knights?"
“But he's invisible, and a supervillian how is he going to fail?”
“That's your job as the writer, now, editorial mandate he fails”
---
Only to find it wasn't a knight, but one of the vikings, TADS got confused in the melee. Luckily you don't think anyone saw that.
>>26806382
Dreadjaw grabs a knight in her jaws, thrashing around before spitting her into an oncoming group of yeomares.
Both groups look worse for the wear.
The single remaining Yeomare's rally falling upon the Crystal tornadoe.
[1d10-2]
The knights charge Cerulean [1d10+1]
The vikings chage the knights [1d10-2]
>>26806455
The heroic equestrian fail, while the vikings pound into the flank of the knights. Defeat is close at hand for the remaining equestrias.
>>26806455
Roll to cont. ahem "knocking out" more ponies.
"BITE MY SHINY CRYSTAL TORNADO" i shout; startling the others less because of a large tornado talking, but more that there were no grammatical issues with her sentence.
>>26806479
[1d10+3]
>>26806469
"Aw shit."
TADS quickly wipes the blood from his blade, looking around.
"Well... I can't fail aaaaaat..."
TADS runs into the fortress to take tapestries, gold and silver, running amok,
"This!"
>>26806455
"YAR HAR HAR HAAAARR!!" Cerulean proclaims loudly, seemingly reveling in the fight. She looks at one of the injured groups, looking like she's smelling blood in the water.
"That's not a knife!" She proclaims to the knights, drawing her dussage and grinning as she likely towers over them.
"Now THIS is a knife!"
She them proceeds to swing her blade with tremendous force at the group of knights.
>Slam, speanding 3 villain points to make it AoE
>Ranged, DC -1, crits 8+, +1
[1d10+4]
>>26806479
This time the knights are flung around, leaving none up.
>>26806578
Cerulean gets ready to slam the knights, but finds that the crystal tornado has already taken care of them, almost as if some editor from on high had wanted to make the new villian look cool. So she instead destroies the remaining yeoman group..
"THE CASTLE IS OURS!" Shouts Hogath. "My lords,I had thought to simply raid this castle. But with your might, we could go further, face those hate equestria heroes. We could take the treasures of Prance, or even Trottingham palace.
---
Crystal, at this point you have won the battle. Since these battles tend to take a while, there won't be any more for this session, though feel free to do some after-battle RP. We will be having another next week, which is intended to be tougher, with super opposition facing you. If you want to join us, I'd love to have you, we start at around 9-10 US Easter Standard time.
>>26806637
cool cool. this was fun. i hope to do this again soon... i got about a half hour left in me. lets RP, shall we?
>>26806479
>also, it's preferred you hang out in the cytube during the entirety of the game session, for communication's sake
>>26806681
noted. are we going to continue, or we going to sleep?
>>26806502
TADS manages to steal silverware, golden candlesticks, even some tapastries. A nice haul, though, not as much as the one time they robbed the mint train, it looks like border fortresses aren't overstocked, the real riches are probably in the civilized heart of equestrian.
>>26806699
Your choice, I'm probably turning in in about 15 minutes.
>>26806710
i'm putting the choice into the *AHEM* hooves of the other players. i'm completely indifferent about weather we cont. or not.
I cast "SPELL OF CRYSTAL INDECISION" [1d10]
>>26806637
>>26806701
Walking out with a sack full of loot, TADS picks up one of the viking helmets from a nearby dead pony (probably the one he killed) and puts it on over his balaclava,
"Yeah! But first, we should totally get wasted. They have a wine cellar down below the fort. Last one down there's a superhero."
Stallion runs back into the fortress, holding his small switchblade out like a sword while shouting "skaål" at the top of his lungs.
>>26806735
i egarly follow behind. wondering what a whine is. with half a "knocked out"" body in me and three weapons stuck in me from when i re-materialized.
>>26806637
"Ahh, I love the smell of a kicked flank in the morrrrning," Cerulean says, idly picking up scraps of pony equipment (mostly the metal armor from the knights) and forcefully using her strength to bend/flex it to her size until she has somewhat armored up her soggy dress, restoring a little bit of masculinity to it...as much as an armored up dress can, at least.
"Not quite me, but it will have to do."
>>26806735
>>26806746
"Looks like ye two be superheroes, then!" Cerulean yells at the two, running past them with speed and greater strides to the booze. It may not be rum, but beggars can't be choosers at this point.
>>26806759
i shout "oh no doesn't she!" and form part of me into a large crystalline pole, i stick it out, effectively clothes-lining you
