Howdy, partner!
What you see here began as a series of comedy-centric stories with the concept of an alicorn-ascended Princess Applejack trying to change a mismanaged Equestria for the better by humorously interacting with the other, quite lazy, princesses.
Not to mention a whole bunch of Changelings with nothing better to do but cause mischief.
The whole thing was set in motion by this gem:
~~~~~
>So, wait, why am Ah' a princess again?
>Because you seem to be the only goddamn one of those ponies who gets that a Princess need to do actual work regarding maintenance of the kingdom. You know how much city planning or trade negotiations Twilight or Luna have done? Fucking nothing. Everyone is obsessed with the world ending threats they think I should fight, but the minute I point out the free health care I have to work to maintain everyone goes quiet. And don't even get me started on Cadence, who can't even manage a basic meeting with the Equestrian Games representative. Fucking annoying. Go do actual princess stuff, because apparently everyone else got the pamphlets mixed up or something and thinks "Princess" means "Beat cop."
~~~~~
Are you feeling creative? Try your hand at writing a story! No contribution is too small and we love having new folks around.
If you're more artistically inclined give a drawing or sketch a shot. Don't fret too much; it doesn't have to be fancy and we appreciate artwork a lot.
If that isn't your style either, writers always need feedback. So tell us what you liked - and what you didn't - to help us improve.
If you are unsure about anything, do not be afraid to ask. We will gladly bring you up-to-date or explain anything you feel is unclear.
Thread 112! C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
>>25717170
1. https://archive.today/f0oQ3
2. https://archive.today/dI35Q
3. https://archive.today/o0ktE
4. https://archive.today/w071K
5. https://archive.today/L40YG
6. https://archive.today/EaVK7
7. https://archive.today/uCJn9
8. https://archive.today/c1XZZ
9. https://archive.today/SjdzK
10. https://archive.today/Jmtlu
11. https://archive.today/eqheI
12. https://archive.today/qkLek
13. https://archive.today/EDijG
14. https://archive.today/ZbNtc
15. https://archive.today/CnI1z
16. https://archive.today/pTcOu
17. https://archive.today/MXTjw
18. https://archive.today/kk3FI
19. https://archive.today/JFE0I
20. https://archive.today/wygJG
21. https://archive.today/3bu9x
22. https://archive.today/63p7X
23. https://archive.today/G7mEf
24. https://archive.today/kKu4B
25. https://archive.today/7C6Nz
26. https://archive.today/5YZEa
27. https://archive.today/x8QWT
28. https://archive.today/kIJBv
29. https://archive.today/EP1S2
30. https://archive.today/0rb3f .5 version here https://archive.today/Y5NYc
31. https://archive.today/ONFET
32. https://archive.today/MpCy9
33. https://archive.today/Cqdkc
34. https://archive.today/tts5W
35. https://archive.today/kwIRG
35. https://archive.today/kwIRG
36. https://archive.today/x5j0H
37. https://archive.today/wrcRi
38. https://archive.today/kuXoA
39. https://archive.today/w5Qol
40. https://archive.today/69MUD
41. https://archive.today/1k1Is
42. https://archive.today/CrDfr
43. https://archive.today/ZGUy3
44. https://archive.today/vhtYd
45. https://archive.today/42Hp9
46. https://archive.today/Ah1u9
47. https://archive.today/Eh4Jl
48. https://archive.today/siDSi
49. https://archive.today/VFpsr
50. https://archive.today/kh6Md
51.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20740272/
52.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20855918/
53.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20948915/
54.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21045744/
55.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21159397/
56.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21278151/
57.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21405993/
58.desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21510114/
>>25717187
59. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21619890/
60. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21715642/
61. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21858107/
62. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21945390/
63. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22007346/
64. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22086019/
65. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22152409/
66. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22223659/
67. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22274618/
68. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/
69. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22395817/
70. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22458614/
71. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22571091/
72. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22651546/
73. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22736626/
74. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22828938/
75. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22908818/
76. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22963669/
77. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23030892/
78. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23102420/
79. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23200765/
80. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23282365/
81. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23369224/
82. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23443675/
83. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23520799/
84. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23581564/
85. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23656624/
86. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23764354/
87. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23878745/
88. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23973977/
89. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24059974/
90. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24160401/
91. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24245691/
92. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24333335/
93. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24423649/
94. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24476469/
95. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24523227/
96. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24574722/
97. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24626415/
98. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24690967/
99. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24759374/
100. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24814923/
101. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24894930/
>>25717198
102. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24958159/
103. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25046878/
104. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25132701/
105. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25222467/
106. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25301100
107. desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25385359
108 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25460161
109 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25529408
110 desustorage.org/mlp/thread25616096
111 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25673487
Here is full archive of ALL the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.
Check out the pastebin here:
http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejack
Curious what happened last time, or just wanna know what happens during an active thread?
Check out the previous thread here:https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25673487
You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and explanation of the various concepts used in these stories!
Check out the wiki here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_Wiki
Confused about when a character first showed up or who they are? Want to know when an arc started?
Check out the character notes and details here :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650
We have begun working on a big project to fix up old stories and make this crazy world more coherent and accessible to new readers who don't like the thread format.
Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharing
And finally, while most of the thread is very much clop free, we have a pastebin in case you're feeling a little more naughty with your writing, find it here. http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessAJAfterDark please upload any like it to a pastebin so they can be added out of thread.
And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/!
First for Sexy Hooves!
>>25717229
Aw nuts.
>>25717170
So this one time...me and mah cousin Peach were found in another castle.
>>25717255
You can only keep me off my throne for so long, anon!
>>25717229
>1 minute
DAMN son!
>>25717278
I'll get it next time.
>>25717170
>Dat OP
...I feel like this is the one time I would be happy if I saw Toad in the castle.
>>25717290
Gotta go fast when you want to take the crown.
>>25717229
AYYY he's back
good work dude
OOCO
>AJ
"SA"
~~~
>...Mmmmm...
"...Ohhh yeahhhh..."
>...That was... that was amazing.
"No need to bolster my pride."
>Heh, bein' serious, yer' actually really good at this. See why the changelings are all over ya' now.
"It's a talent."
>...Kinda confused why Cadence don't want none o' this, though. That whole mess... heh, mess... was great.
"I have long since stopped questioning it."
>Figures... well, iffin' ya' ever need a 'dance partner' as it were-
"Oh, I'm bringing you. You're first choice."
>Now who's a flatterer.
"Do I really need to after all that?"
>...Point.
"..."
>...Shiny?
"Yep."
>Ya' think it's weird we like organizing and mailing off paperwork so much?
"...Nope."
>Smart stallion.
Pinkie Preview Prophecy
>Somepony throws off my groove.
>Twilight punches somepony to stop them from bleeding and it works.
>Deus ex Machina from the Queenlings.
>Spike brings in a barrel of super glue and wonders what glue is made of.
>DT jury rigs a potato for power.
>Silver Spoon recreates the batmare running with a bomb scene by strapping a fake bomb to her back.
>The Cutie Mark Crusader sacrifice an alpaca.
>Stabby fanservice!I am off my game.
>>25717711
>>The Cutie Mark Crusader sacrifice an alpaca.
.......PP anon, you okay?
>>25717711
>CMC sacrifice an Alpaca
Paprika noooooo!
>>25717711
>DT with a potato
oh no
she's going to make an AI in a potato
>>25717789
Hope it comes with a slow clap feature.
>Jetset
“???”
____
What was the sound of an unstable force moving at high-speeds being stopped by an object with the density of a mountain?
GROOOOONG.
There. That sound.
>GAH!
He hit the ground hard, sinking in up to his waist when his lower half phased out, while whatever stopped him whirled around with a gasp.
“Holy marshmallow-coated rumps of not-mom! Are you okay, man? You jus’ came outta nowhere and BASH UGH THUD! You cool, you alright, how’d you do that an’… an’… are you buried up to your belly there?”
Jetset knew this changeling. Even in his bleary-minded mindset, he knew and remembered well this changeling who possessed his apple queen’s style of mane.
This changeling who was prodding him in the cheek.
“Hey. Hey. Why’s your left ear flickerin’ like that? Flicka-flick-flicka-flicker-flick-IT’S GONE! What the-how’d you DO that?!”
And then came the seriously painful head bops as Fifty-Six attempted to find Jetset’s glitching ear by mashing his hoof into that vacant spot.
Over and over again.
Bop. BOP. Bop. Two bops. An extra hard bop.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, it’s not coming ba-IT’S BACK AGAIN!”
>I wish my eardrums would glitch out, your voice is like a hammer striking hot metal.
“Oh, hey, I ‘member you! You’re that super secret guy, the one who fights with not-moms super secret guy… that jerk….”
Ignoring the suddenly brooding bug, Jetset turned to trying to dig himself free, struggling and grunting and gaining no ground.
“What’re y’all doin’ allllll the way out here in the woods?”
>Training.
“Cool! I gots some trainin’ to do myself! How’s yours goin’?”
>Terrible. I failed.
“Cool!”
Fifty-Six’s utterly pleased smile left Jetset feeling one part confused, one part annoyed.
>Dense as ever, I see.
1/?
>>25717885
“Nuh! ‘Cuz see, I ‘member a long time ago when I was writin’ my cuz? I told him how I kept failin’ left an’ right tryin’ to do my own thing. An’ ya know what he told me?”
>No, but I assume you’re going to tell me anyway.
“Yuh! He told me that fail… that word doesn’t mean what everyone thinks it does!”
>So your cousin’s in dire need of a dictionary, then. I can arrange one be sent to h-
Bop.
Okay, that one nearly made Jetset bite his tongue off.
“It’s true! Fail is actually a sentinem for somethin’ else! It means ‘first attempt in learning’!”
>…
“See? So don’t get all bogged down thinkin’ of it the normal way, think of failin’ in the right way! You’re learnin’! We all are! So fail as much as ya can!”
Huh. It actually felt… good, to chuckle. Both at this changeling’s butchery of the word ‘acronym’… and the fact that he was indeed right.
With every fail, came a new lesson learned for the future.
“So c’mon! Up an’ at ‘em! Get on outta that dirt an’ let’s get goin’, secret dude!”
>…
“C’mon!”
>…
“…Ya know, I keep walkin’ away an’ keep havin’ to come back ‘cuz you’re not followin’!”
>I’m currently buried up to my armpits and steadily sinking into the cold earth. Not that I’d follow you even if I lost my sight but how you expect me to is-
Scoop.
Thump.
>…
Scoop.
Thump.
>…Why?
Scoop.
Thump.
“’Cuz we’ve both gotta lot more failin’ to do before we get anywhere, that’s why.”
And with a firm nod, Fifty-Six continued to use his miniature wings to scoop at the dirt around Jetset in what was sure to be a long endeavor towards freedom.
>…Perhaps… maybe I misjudged y-
“So to pass the time, who d’ya think has the bestest booty? Applebutt or not-mom? Smell-wise, I think-”
>Die.
>>25717898
Well, that's an unlikely a pair if I ever saw it.
And daw for 29's note, that's fucking cute.
>>25717756
>>25717777 (nice quads)
Look at my face. I'm the very pinnacle of okay. No shadows here.
I'm sure the sacrifice will not be in vain and will rest forever here in our hearts.
>>25717711
>Stabby Fanservice
"...dear, you suddenly got a very large smile on your face."
'Poppet, I've no clue why, but I feel very very...excited.'
LAST THREAD RECAP, AJ CRASHES AT CELLY'S OLD PLACE EDITION!
>Lavan is slowly driving everyone insane by asking about changelings. Or just by being there. Or accidentally being nice that one time!
>18 wants to know if Chrysalis has a plan in case something goes wrong. She does. This, inexplicably, makes 18 feel better.
>In Ponyville, things are... not going well.
>With AJ gone, Chitania and 13 makes a move to take the lings. Initially, Pommel and Sunset tries to out talk her, but this utterly fails. After they ask the lings and get from them that they want safety, it looks like they're about to leave.
>Until Sunset has a brilliant idea, and points out that 29 still isn't there! Despite his nature, 13 does want to protect the entire hive, and that includes getting him to safety. Unable to go off herself, or send her mother, 13 is out of options when Sunset offers to get him herself, even though she knows this is just to stall.
>13 says she has one hour to 'find' him before she just sends Chitania after him, and Sunset runs off.
>Cue a whole lot of awkward small talk from Pommel and Chitania.
>Also, Chitania is not a fan of Monopony, to put it mildly.
>Spike and DT have a bit of an... issue.
>Shinings attempt to hang out with 2 does not go well when Gwendolyn's airship arrives.
>Cadence, however, is too caught up in trying to be a better royal to go do the diplomacy thing. The thing she's really good at.
>She sends Shining instead. This is not a good idea.
>Instead, Gwendolyn bursts in, sends Idris out of the room and starts screaming her head off and insulting Shining for making her trade with a changeling.
>Then, out of the blue, Chrysalis appears, and asks if that would really be such a bad thing. Since she's been considering staking it out on her own, she outright asks if they ever did if Gwen would ally with them like she did the CE.
1/3justthreeandit'sallovertheplace
>>25718303
>To her dismay, Gwen vehemently says no, outright comparing Chrysalis to Chitania at her worst and openly declaring she will never ally with changelings.
>When Shining, a little angry to say the least, asks her what she wants to achieve, she replies she wants every changeling out of the Empire's castle, now and forever, or else she's cutting off trade.
>Shining absolutely loses his cookies, screaming right back and getting so angry he splits his table in two. He tells her off and orders her to get out of the Empire, and that's that.
>Chrysalis leaves this abrasive, heading straight for the portal as soon as they're gone while pondering that this would be the case with everyone when she strikes it out on her own. She starts to get into very harsh thoughts, when Shining stops her just before she leaves to Canterlot.
>He pleads with her to stop, outright begging her not to make the situation worse. Because while he can mitigate the Gwen thing, if she makes it worse, if it gets bad in Canterlot, then he might not be able to do anything. His people might ask her to go, and, as he puts it.
>"I don't want you to go."
>Chrysalis is touched by this, calms down immensely, but insists she has to go to Canterlot. But before she does, she promises she won't make the situation worse. All she asks is that he believe her.
>He believes her.
>Screwloose knows about Pennydrop entering the castle... somehow.
>Pennydrop does indeed go in, and a back and forth with Celly ensues when Celly sees through her almost instantly after Pennydrop states she doesn't want to helm the investigation herself. Despite this, Pennydrop plays it off, makes her demands for the investigations and barring all the changelings and changeling associates from the castle, and keeps up with Celestia's verbal sparring. Outright challenging her in one instance, which Celestia doesn't take her up on.
2/3justthreebecausefunnyandtalking
>>25718315
>But, sadly, Pennydrop gets the upper hand when she says she's going to go out there and tell everyone she agreed to everything, since if Celestia suddenly backed down after that it would look suspicious.
>Outside, Pennydrop's plan goes off, for a bit. At least until a certain someone steps up.
>Fancypants takes the reigns! He declares he'll be heading up the investigation, and Pennydrop is forced to agree, despite her wanting someone a little more paranoid. Fancy declares he won't hold back, but Celestia isn't worried.
>The mob is dispersed and clear, leaving only Pennydrop and Celestia, who shoot barbs at each other one last time, with Pennydrop wishing her a happy vacation.
>...Well, the beaches are nice that time of year...
>29 tries sneaking. Gets Mission Impossible instead... yep.
>The CMC fail to stop that thing they did, and A strange new challenger appears!
>7 meets up with his last beast-thing, Blossom, who is quite a lot smarter than the others and tailing... something.
>BUT FOR THE MAIN EVENT!
>Applejack is in Everfree Castle, going over the events that transpired and what brought her here.
>She has a hallucinatory conversation with Celestia, just like old times.
>She thinks back to her parents and if they would be proud of her.
>She questions what brought her to lie in the first place, and for so long
>And, finally, in desperation, she turns to the Tree of Harmony, the thing that helped her out so long ago, to maybe have an answer to solve this situation.
>One problem.
>It's not talking to her.
>...Because it's a tree.
>Didn't think this through all the way.
Well, that was some discussiony discussion! Talkative talkers, and all that.
As a result, if I missed anything, make sure to send the antrhax to THEM this time! Not that this wasn't a lovely give from Spike-Mini anon for all the confusion with his timeline, but double gifting is simply passe!
Send some to the less fortunate, won't you? They don't have any biological weapons at all!
>>25718224
>77 and Cheerilee
>implying that's who's getting the happy stabby time
OCOO
>Screwloose
"12"
~~
"You're sure this is safe?"
>Yes yes of course it's safe, would I do it if it wasn't?
"..."
>yes I would, but I can assure you that this isn't the case this time, you go under, I get to have my fun and when you wake up it's like nothing ever happened because...
"because what?"
>...huh, does that work?
"does what work? Screws? this is starting to sound like you need a hoof massage"
>shush pervert, I'm thinking
"care to let me in? just this once?"
>you know what? yeah, sure, whatever
"okay, and....?"
>I'm wondering if, given my love for experimentation, you'll actually heal from it
"...huh"
>Well now I just have to test this, UNDER YOU GO!
"WAIT WE CAN JUS-GLARAGHHGHAG"
>>25718363
NC
'Guard'
~~~
'Miss? We need all changelings to leave the- OH DEAR FAUST!'
>THIS ISN'T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!
'...'
>...It's actually kinda worse, thinking on it...
>>25718363
Nooooo, Screwloose you literal and figurative biiiitch!
>>25718363
>fanservice is the first thing unlocked
WHAT IS THIS HERESY
>>25718011
Sad part is, you just know he stole it out of a book he read and passed it off as his own.But he did it because he needed to cheer up 56, and he knew that 56 wouldn't understand when he said he would never be a failure to him.
>>25718643
WILDCARD BITCHES!
>Pommel
"13"
'Chitty'
-41-
~SP~
"Aaaand there."
>Now if this isn't interspecies cooperation, I don't know what is.
-Beg to differ!-
~How is this cooperating!?~
'You two cooperated to be a couple of idiots-'
>-and we cooperated to tie you up so you don't piss off Chitania. And Chitania cooperated by being scary as hell and restraining herself because she...
'...'
>Sheeeee...
'...what?'
>Can kill you without even think-come ON I set it up for you and everything!
'I wasn't thinking about it.'
>...irony of ironies. Point is, we're alllll getting along here, juuuust fine.
~Begging to differ here.~
>Yeah well.
Fomp!
~Mmph!~
-Hey! Not cool, dude-!-
Fomp!
-Mmph!-
"You literally had them put a sock in it."
>Lucky for me this town apparently just has those lying around, hell if I know why.
"..."
'...'
>...sooooo-
'I could kill you without even thinking about it. So shut up.'
>And the balance is restored.
>>25719394
>Even they can't stand those two
Harsh.
>>25719807
Well they DID poke one of the most dangerous non-deity beings alive in the eye with a paper airplane depicting them somehow beating her AND Pommel up.
It's honestly for their own good.
>>25719807
Look man, if they are that dumb enough to poke the literal walking nuke of punches, tying them up can only be a blessing. Worst case scenario is they choke on the rope somehow, and that's not a terrible thing
>>25718303
Note to self, gotta go back and read about Shinys rage moment.
Another thing about splitting AJ's development into onepostz, they're harder to find and reread on the archives
>>25721299
and I still wouldn't trade a one post story for a multiparter. I hate wading through the long ones to find what I need. Also it's why I put images on mine.
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Applejack"
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and I bring in the good times! Now for our main guest...APPLEJACK!!!
"Howdilly hoo."
>Can dance we if we want to?
"We can leave our friends behind...Oh hey, that reminds me-"
>Okay here we go...
"One time me and mah cousin Peach were out on a class trip to the Smokey Mountains and she somehow got left behind. She was missing for about 7 hours. When we found her she apparently drank her own piss. That's the funny ha ha part anyway. It gets a little dark because cousin Peach started worshiping a dead squirrel to help her. Had a little alter for it and everything. She had creepy face paint on and covered herself in leaves. Later she managed to set the leaves on fire from the alter which was what helped us find her in the first place...cousin Peach doesn't like to talk about that one."
>Um...uh hey that's all the time we have! Thanks for joining us and g'night everypony!
AJ wakes up.
"...huh that actually was the whole story this time."I hope no one finds Ellis-Jack boring because it's been oddly fun coming with these and has been a great breather for me. Plus it helps me get used to the way AJ talks by making her talk a lot.
>>25721545
Nah they are their own little special of weird and cute, I love them.
>>25721545
I sure as hell don't mind.
>>25721545
Ill be honest, I love and kinda look forwards to Cousin Peach's next tale. She's like... the most interesting mare alive.
>>25721299
Well I do love my multi partners, I also cannot deny that the one shots are doing pretty good job. They are accomplishing what they are setting out to do and we don't need 2/4 more
>>25722231
Assuming she's still alive, that is...
OCOO
>AJ
"Spike"
'Chrysalis'
~~
>...How ling till you think she notices?
"Annnny second now."
>...
"..."
>....
"..."
>...
"..."
>...Huh.
"Weird, right? I expected screaming by now."
>Ain't that odd? We-
BOOM!
>GAAAHHHHH!
"HAKKK! OH DEAR FAUST THE SMELL!"
>AH' CAN TASTE PURPLE!
"HOW'D SHE GET THE STINK BOMB IN OUR ROOM!?"
>AHHHHHH IT BURNS!
'That enough screams for you?'
>"HOW!?"
'BECAUSE MOTHERFUCKING CHANGELING!'
>SA
"Cadence"
~~~
>Sooo, we um... we might not be trading with the gryphons for a while... or ever... ever is kind of likely here.
"I'm sure you did the best you could."
>Wow, you know, the idea that this was my best is actually somehow worse than if I had halfassed it.
"You did fine."
>I told her to get the fuck out of the castle. Literally. Those words.
"She probably deserved it."
>Not going to say she didn't, she most certainly did, but I'm also admitting that mayyyybe I got a little carried away.
"I'm sure it wasn't that bad."
>I broke our table.
"...The nice sapphire blue one?"
>That one.
"Oh."
>...
"......I never liked that table."
>Sooo, um... maybe you handle the next one?
"You did fine."
>I... I legitimately don't know what part of this was fine to you.
"...You did fine."
>...
"..."
>How's it coming?
"About as well as your thing went."
>Ah. That bad?
"..."
>You'll get there.
"...I..."
>...
"...I think I will."
>At least I did something right today.
>Chitania
"Lucky Strikes"
'Pommel'
~~~
>...
"...Hey, Miss Chitania? I-"
'That way lies madness, soldier.'
"I just wanted to ask her a question."
'In other words, you're already too crazy.'
"...Excuse me, Miss Chitania?"
>...
"Are you like... getting royalties for that comic?"
>Am I getting what now? Just because I'm a Queen doesn't mean I'm actually royalty of a fucking piece of paper.
"N-no, not... not royalty, royalties. Tees."
>...Start speaking changeling.
"How am I supposed to do that? I only know Equestrian."
>Same thing.
"Really?"
>Have you ever heard of us talking in a different language?
"..."
'...HUH.'
"But uh, I just wanted to know if you were getting compensated for that comic book. This might sound kind of petty, but my nephew is really into that book, and his my sister just keeps buying it, but me and her wife think it would be kinda weird to keep like... paying you."
>I don't get paid for the fucking comic book, why would I?
"...It has your name on it? And she like... does your powers and everything. It literally looks like you, exactly."
>So?
"...Have you never heard of-"
'Stop.'
"But this seems to be-"
'Soldier stop.'
"..."
'Let me have this.'
>...I feel like I'm missing something... meh, I'll look it up when I get home.
'Why must you take everything I love, Lucky!?'
"See, this is why I never talk."
>>25723575
>Pennydrop paying Chitty royalties
I can hear the screams from here.
>>25723668
Right?
Just
>I HAVE TO GIVE WHAT TO HER!?... Get every fucking lawyer!
"Wouldn't legal costs be way more than-"
>GET THEM ALL I SAID!
>>25723179
>'BECAUSE MOTHERFUCKING CHANGELING!'
She has a point.
Trying to out-changeling a changeling only works about 60 percent of the time.
...wait.
>>25724079
They do get outfoxed a rather startling amount.
Huh.
>AJ
~~~
For all it's majesty, for all it's splendor, for all it's wonderful, beautiful light, there was only one problem with the greatest source of harmonious magic on the face of their planet.
That was the undeniable fact that it was, even still, a tree.
>So... could you give me a sign here?
So when she looked to it with questions, seeking guidance of light in this dark time, she found nothing but, ever still, a tree.
>Look... Equestria's in a lotta chaos right now, you gotta feel that, right? There's so much wrong, so much confusion and disharmony, we need ya' ta'... ta' do what ya' do. We need a way ta' fix this.
It was desperate, it was without sense, she knew this. She had not a single idea what she sought as she looked to the tree, looked over the branches that held the power she herself had once wielded. She knew this, even if she still pleaded on, and found herself moving ever closer to the trunk.
She did not know what she asked, exactly. To be given her element back? To be granted another power? For the tree, itself, to let out a light that would calm the world and bring peace and harmony in such a time? She didn't know. She didn't know what she wanted, she didn't know what she needed, except for one thing.
Answers.
More than any other time in her life, she needed answers.
She had been given them, over the course of her 'reign', over the course of her tenure as a princess. She had been given answers by many, from sources she trusted. Celestia, Twilight, even her own Granny had spoken to her and encouraged her and given her the strength to go on. They had seemingly provided answers for her, before.
But it wasn't enough.
>Just... help me here.
Her eyes at last landed on a symbol she knew quite well. She should, after all, it would be quite odd if she did not recognize that which she had used to save the world time and time again.
Honesty.
1/4
>>25724223
That is what the symbol was to mean, honesty. Truth, in the face of lies. That is what honesty meant, that is what Honesty was. Truth.
Something she had not been doing very much of these days.
It hit her, as she looked to that symbol, as she looked to that beacon that was supposed to be a shining light for all of Equestria, that her time as a princess had not been quite so honest.
She had lied, she admitted. She had hidden things, that was true. When Chrysalis and all her wiles came at her, she fought back with as many underhanded tactics as the Queen herself was capable. When Ten came to her with revelations following the fall of Partyland, all of the events that lead to the near fight in Catnerlot, so many other instances... she had lied on so many occasions, and it was almost always through omission. She lied with what she did not say, less than what she spoke.
But no one was perfect. Her status as an Element barer did not mean she could be nothing but the truth, did it? Surely, she was allowed to slip up sometimes, everyone did.
Surely, she didn't cause this...
It was not something she wished to hear. It was never something she wished to think. But the longer she looked to it, the longer she realized.
When the answer had not been clear, she had hidden it.
>...Just help us already.
Her hoof touched the splendor of that magical trunk, tingling with the sensation of power going up it.
>You always have a power to help us, you always have a way for us to solve chaos in Equestria, always. Just give us a power to use already!
But it would not. It remained, hanging still as trees normally do.
To any other, demanding an answer of such a thing would be akin to madness. To Applejack, it made all the sense in the world.
>Whatever you want me ta' do, Ah'll do it. Just... fix it. Give us a way ta' fix all of this!
It was the only thing that made sense.
2/4
>>25724228
The tree had the power, the tree had the magic, the tree had the ability to grant the means to save the world whenever it chose. She needed it, more than she had ever needed anything in the world. She needed a way to keep from having all her efforts be for nothing, to keep from having the world descend into paranoia and distrust, she needed something, anything, to turn the battle back against this before everything was lost.
Surely, of all things, this tree understood that. This tree, the bearer of the very concept of harmony, understood that.
>So please... won't you help us?
She waited, hopeful, expectant, purely believing that it would be delivered. Waiting for that magic to come, for the answer to be given, for the way to save the world to curl down from a living vine and placed right in her hooves.
She waited, knowing it would likely take something of herself, an offering of understanding, to activate whatever it was that was given, but ready to. She had understood much in her time in the castle, and if not she could figure it out. She could find the truth, save the day, save Equestria again.
She just needed the power.
>Please...
She waited, never once doubting it would be there.
And she waited...
And she waited...
And she waited...
>...Come on already!
She waited until the hope wavered, and something else set in.
>Come one! Ya' got magic whoosywhatsts! Ya' got all the power in the world, don't you!? You've got more power than anything in the world combined! You've got more power than Discord, then all the alicorns, then freaking anything! You can fix this all lickety split no problem! You can help me, just do anything!
Her frustration grew, translating to her forehooves hitting the trunk of the unbreakable thing in rapid taps, as if to shake the answer right from it's branches.
An answer that would not fall.
3/4
>>25724240
>Give me a way to stop the changelings disguises, give me a way to show the truth in any situation, give me the power to show the past events as they happened or something! A freaking ring of illusion breaking, a dang tiara of time traveling, a gaddang hat that makes you tell the truth or something! Anything! You can fix all of this, what are you waiting for!? Ah'll give you whatever you want, Ah'll learn whatever you want, just give me something to aim for, something to work for! Something to direct me and point me and give me an end goal, something!... Something!
But the tree did nothing.
>...Something?
In the piece of Equestria bathed in the light of harmony itself, at the trunk of the tree that held in it the power beyond any other magic, in what should be the place with the most hope and light of any world, she was left with nothing but silence.
>Ah' need an answer.
She had come down here with only that, a single thought, a single need.
She hadn't found it.
>Please...
She found nothing but her strength being sapped from her as she slid down the trunk, until she was curled up at it's base.
>...Just fix it.
But the tree did not answer her.
It remained silent...
As trees often are.
>>25724244
NC
~Oh fine, for fucks sake! Here!~
>GAHHHHHH! TALKIN' TREEE!
*ZOOM!*
~Applejack? Don't you want the thing? Applejack, it'll... come back! I can't follow you, I'm a tree! I'm... shit... At least tell me if Fresh Prance of Bell Air is still on, my reception hasn't worked for years! APPLEJACK!?... Shit. Always have to blow it when I get a pretty mare in here.~
>>25724244
The ONE TIME it doesn't give magic necklaces...
Guess "Diplomacy power Applejack" wasn't a hot seller at Hasbro.
>>25724134
making them stupid or overconfident enough to be fooled is a slight nerf to keep them from being too OP
>>25724327
Also going for the eyes.
>Acty
"Lavan"
'88'
~~~
>Hmmm... Go fish?
FWOOSH!
FLOPFLOPFLOP!
"Is that one big enough?
>...I don't know what I expected.
'WOW, that stinks!'
"Does it? I'm unfortunately unable to smell it, due to lacking olfactory senses."
'Awww, poor guy. Gotta condition? There there-
TISSS!'
'SON OF A MONKEY-HIVE'S SECOND COUSIN'S BASTARD!... I grabbed the damn radiator again, didn't I!?'
>No.
'Why is there so many hot things in the room with the blind changeling!?'
"I will get rid of them for you."
>NO WAIT-
BOOM!
>Darn it, my fridge! It had my lunch in there!
"But there is a fish right there."
>I can't eat raw fish-
FOOM!
>...
"Is that cooked enough?"
>Over did it, I think.
"Are you sure? Don't you normally have to taste it?"
>Do I have to taste the tiny black lump, is what you're asking.
"...Yes?"
>No, I do not have to do that. I can tell.
"Impressive!"
>...I used to be a normal guard you know.
"Congratulations!"
>...
"What?"
'And I thought I was bad in social situations.'
>>25721545
>All that
>From 7 hours
And I thought I was bad when my power went out.
I only sacrificed a mole-rat I didn't worship a squirrel!
>>25724495
>>...I don't know what I expected.
In all fairness, what DID you expect?
>>25724687
A friendly card game to pass the time with three Changelings and a giant head of fire.
>>25724741
Wait he's a head now? I thought he was still a mouth and some eyeballs.
>>25724765
I am picturing a mouth, eyes, and a ball of flame that would be where the head should be when I think of him.
>29
"MM"
'Zecora'
[Trixie]
~~
>...You don't think it's like this up in Canterlot, do you?
"Uhhhh..."
>Nahhh, tis likely a far lesser time, so many more guards up there!
'Which will... help, that is true. The one who is correct is you.'
>Of course! T'was silly to think that a riot, of all things a riot, which might otherwise endanger someone much smaller who is full of quite insane thinking such that he wishes to be a guard of some kind who would most certainly recklessly rush into a stupid situation where he is clearly outclassed but does it anyway, that would be silly! Likely the princess has ensured a land of peace.
"..."
'...'
[....OHHHH! He's talking about Fifty Si-]
Whup
>Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-
"Now look what you did."
'Um, Twenty Nine? Uncurl your spine.'
>Eeeeeeee-
"He's not going anywhere. Good job."
[...And Trixie was doing so well too...]
>eeeeeeeee..
>>25724495
Ahhh, don't worry 29! Jetset's got him!
And he probably won't kill him... probably.
>>25717170
Puncess Luna: 'So, in the SuperMareio games, the particular pone in your OP pic is PrincessApple?'
>>25724951
Wow, hell of a quote miss there buddy.
But Jetset probably won't, it's not like he has a hatred of chang-
Oh....
>>25725186
Well he's calmed down a lot since trying to be less 'crack a neck, ask later' and more patient.
Should be no problems!....shouldn't be....
>>25725186
I'm calling it, odd couple road trip time
>13
"Haymaker"
~~~~~
>...
"...So I've been noticing something this whole time. Whenever she starts to get... antsy, you scream and she stops."
>...
"...Is that mind control/ Are you mind controlling her? Are you mind-whatvering her into not being mad?"
>...
"Please tell me if you are, I will feel so much more safe."
>I'm not using mind magic.
"You sure? I mean, I'm no expert, but... damn."
>...Don't need magic.
"What do you use then?"
>...Something better.
"..."
>...
"..Wait.. seriously?"
>She's still my mom.
"Wow, uh... wow."
>...
"... that's weird."
>Try living it sometime.
>>25725304
Wait, wouldn't Jet actually be exempt from this whole management thing? Not only has he never interacted with the lings, he outright tried to murder them on several occasions.
>>25725759
I'm more concerned that this basically shuts down the government for the duration.
>>25725759
Jet the guy working directly for Celestia and AJ, and is going to walk back into Canterlot with 56 in toe? Not that glitchy is any good at the moment. That other anon had it, there is like three people in the castle that have no implication of changeling involvement and they are all imprisoned in some way.
>>25725916
So....goverment shutdown chaos when?
>>25725916
I forget, was Primrose/Red one of those? I see an opportunity for something...
>>25726017
anon...please...not right now. we've had enough 'opportunities' blowing up for a while. Have mercy...
>>25726031
THIS
THIS ARC WAS SUPPOSED TO FIX THE CHANGELING ISSUE
INSTEAD RARITY MADE IT WORSE
Also pennydrop put the ENTIRE EQUESTRIAN GOVERNMENT INTO SHUTDOWN
Also GRIFFONS BROKE OFF TRADE RELATIONS WITH THE CRYSTAL EMPIRE
ALSO EVERYTHING IS GOING WRONG
LET US FIX IT FIRST, WE CAN PILE ON MORE BROKEN SHIT LATER
>>25726031
It's a funny opportunity, anon, calm yourself.
>>25726349
Y'know...you think that. I know you do. But you have to consider what others will do with it. You'll start with the funny, they'll bring the pain.
>>25726009
>We won everybody! Back pats all around!... Wait, does that mean we don't have a government right now?
"..."
>Whoops.
"Why whoops? Doesn't this mean that literally all of our government was compromised, and now we have a chance to fix it?"
>....Wooo!
>>25726452
"And while we're fixing it, there's no work orders being issued for public works and infrastructure! Golly I hope no big monsters stomp through!"
'Oh! And don't forget the lack of payroll for guards firefighters and since we have free government healthcare, they won't be getting paid either! Sure hope they actually come to work!'
~Yeah! and who needs libraries or courts! lack of funding due to the shutdown means all of that is on hiatus but I'm sure a total anarchy will be just fine!~
+Mission Accomplished Everyone!+
>>25726491
...Now, see, that just makes this whole thing sound scary.
And not in the way you meant, in the "If about 8 or so mares got sick or something, the whole damn country stops working."
Like... Celly doesn't have ANY plans? How did the whole city not explode in the 3 days she took off for Partyland? It's not like they're shutting everything down for a month or something.
>>25726592
No, that's basically exactly what we've established. We JUST had a discussion about how there is no one else at the top of this government. how it ALL gets handled by Aj and Celly.
And it did explode. It got invaded by dolls who curbstomped the guard remember?
And yes, we are basically shipping everyone off for an undetermined period of time while the investigation happens.
Also, apparently the best investigations do not involve any interviews with the relevant parties, but rather just sifting through mountains of nigh indecipherable paperwork.
>>25726620
>Also, apparently the best investigations do not involve any interviews with the relevant parties
Not when the relevant parties may very well have some form of magical mental control, subtle or otherwise, influencing them. You could interview them all you wanted, it wouldn't matter in the end because they very well could have had their memories altered, or think it was their own idea, or anything like that, and there is no way to tell which is which from an outsider's perspective. When you are dealing with someone who is being influenced mentally, you need solid PROOF of what is what, and anything that would strengthen the low-number changelings forces, such as purchasing safehouses, reallocation of other funding into private accounts, delays or mismanagement with their own forces, sudden and unexplained renovations of the castle, or a host of laws centered around giving changelings an advantage in a legal situation would be the concern.
Remember, they don't know if anything happened to Celestia and co, hell, Pennydrop calmed everyone down with that exact notion, this is looking for PROOF. Something tangible they can point to in order to say "AH HA! T'was the bugs after all!"
They're Canterlot, they want to know if this is going to hurt THEM.
>>25726620
>We JUST had a discussion about how there is no one else at the top of this government. how it ALL gets handled by Aj and Celly.
Correct, but even the US Government has a set allocation of funds set aside to keep stuff being paid in the event of a shutdown, which happened recently even. Celly would have a rainy day funding to keep all the city works running for, say, a couple weeks in case of an emergency, stuff like payroll for the guards and judges and libraries.
>And it did explode. It got invaded by dolls who curbstomped the guard remember?
1, it didn't explode. 2, you're missing the big point that, you know, those guards were still on duty. Everything was still running. Imagine that.
>And yes, we are basically shipping everyone off for an undetermined period of time while the investigation happens.
So? That just means no new laws can come into play, no new things that would need official signing can be signed, no new anything can be created or bills passed, but you're exactly wrong on all the other stuff. The funding for all of that is mostly autonomous or yearly funding, it would still run just fine. Hell, the guard functioned without a Captain of the Guard for almost a year.
>Also, apparently the best investigations do not involve any interviews with the relevant parties, but rather just sifting through mountains of nigh indecipherable paperwork.
Yeah, no shit. They need concrete evidence to actually make a case, interviewing someone you think was fucking brainwashed isn't going to help.
>>25726691
Which is why you look for the discrepencies between the stories.
You WANT to interview everyone to find holes, or things one remembers happening that others don't. Sure it's possible the mind magic has just been so perfect as to cover all tracks, but it is also possible it has left a dangling thread.
You'll never know if you don't talk to them.
Also, since they all have mental shields on, it would indicate a much higher level of ill intent if there were such threads, and there is a better chance one got missed or didn't completely take.
>>25726739
>law in place that uses the cake fund out to pay for a year of government shutdown
I could see it
>>25726740
>Which is why you look for the discrepencies between the stories.
What stories? They don't know what they're going to call them out on yet. What exactly are these hypotheticals interviewing for? What would be the questions? They don't know which aspects, if any, were compromised yet.
>>25726740
>You WANT to interview everyone to find holes, or things one remembers happening that others don't.
Correct, but you want to find holes in DISCREPANCIES. As in, when something looks off that happened that you need to get to the bottom of. Right now, what the hell would they ask? If anyone was acting funny?
That wouldn't work for anyone getting kicked out, as they were also in contact with the mind controllers. If they were to do any interview, they would interview someone who wasn't potentially altered first and see if they saw anything strange. Like, castle staff or something? If they think the higher ups are compromised, all of them, interviewing them won't help.
>>25726766
bullshit. not the way she defends that fund,
>>25726787
and the way this investigation has been broken down it's everyone leave you can come back when we're done. not even keeping them on site TO talk to.
>>25726787
>Series of interviews where everyone has to explain the crazy shit they've done for the last year
...I want this.
>>25726808
>and the way this investigation has been broken down it's everyone leave you can come back when we're done. not even keeping them on site TO talk to.
They banned them from the CASTLE.
The CASTLE only. Where all of the sensitive information is held. They can't detain them, as they have no probable cause of anything prison worthy, only that they're not allowed in while they're looking stuff up.
Presumably they're going to actually try to find something, anything first, and THEN bring them in for an interview before letting them back to the area with the sensitive information, maybe? Like... they're not going to let them back in if they find something, right? They're not done investigating till they're done. That's what an ongoing investigation is.
>>25726842
>Miss Rarity, about these... expenditures about a year ago...
YES
YES
YES
YES
YES
>>25726867
Looks like that rarigals in trouble again.
How's she gonna get outta this'n?
>Chrysalis
~~~~~
>Don't make things worse.
It was a simple thing, a simple request.
>Don't make things worse.
Something most did without even intending to, something most did every day of their lives, the default with which they lived.
>Don't make things worse.
That was all that he had asked. He had given things up for her, things she had witnessed personally, and all he asked in return was that simple little thing. One little request, that was all he had wanted from her.
>Don't make things worse.
A simple request that was as sincere as it was sensible. A simple request he spoke not only out of protecting himself, but so many others. A simple request he had made, from the bottom of his heart.
>Don't make things worse.
It was a simple request.
She would abide it.
She took every precaution, a disguise of general nature, not stealing an identity. A quick teleport far away, not inside the castle for more than a second. No words, no matter what she heard. No movements or retaliations or attempts to explain, no matter what was said.
She watched, as it all went down. She watched from just outside of the castle edges as Celestia spoke to them, and that strange mare spoke with her. As that white stallion took the stage, and it was decided. She watched it all, and knew that things were as terrible as feared.
Then she was gone. As fast as she could.
Gone from Canterlot, in search of someone else.
Gone, as fast as she could fly.
She had a single goal in mind, a simple one. She would achieve it.
... And she would not make it worse.
She had promised that.
>>25726955
Chryssy?
Hey Chryssy?
Chryssy? Chryssy.
I know it's been said but...
Don't make things worse.
>>25726424
They do and I will immediately counter it with the most silly bonkers nonsense I can pull out.
>>25727017
I actually kind of feel bad for her. She like that little kid who was carrying a big old Cup that's filled with soda and she just really does not want to spill it. You can see her wobbling and you just want her to succeed. She's trying so hard.
>>25727027
Then all I can say is good luck.
>>25726424
>Bring the pain
They only do that to characters they want to develop, if he uses the side characters he's sitting as pretty as can be.
Unless what he is planning somehow Spurs inspiration that leads to someone thing this character has to become a main thing with their own story, I don't think he has much to worry about.
Seriously, can you name one time anybody actually suffered outside of character development?... Besides shiny I mean.
>>25727035
That is a strangely adorable image.It would break my heart if she dropped it.
>>25727279
the concern is not suffering to develop this character so much as using this character to bring suffering to the others. because that is totally a thing.
>>25727668
Anon, I tell you now, there is a list of things I will not budge on. Number one is Celly's dad being named anything other than Craig, number two is certain characters are just flatout not there for pointless drama. Absurd black comedy yes, but not drama.
>>25727844
I hear what you're saying. I do. But I am just not optimistic about these things here recently.
>>25727844
>number two is certain characters are just flatout not there for pointless drama.
So that's
Like 2, Who we are so protective of we said "You know what? Why don't you just sit Cordyceps out. Oh, Variolus is coming? Uhhhh... Hey Two, vacation tiiiiime!"
>>25728185
Precisely, she's numero uno on that list. Though that's mostly because she's the first character I felt that about. Now granted she's also off the Black Comedy list for me, but I mean, come on, that's a given.
>>25726842
As with most spy investigations, it's best to give anyone who has possibly have been compromised some time off, but do not arrest them or look like they are being looked at because they might fly.
You want them to feel safe and like they personally are not being targeted, especially in cases like this where they may have been influenced unknowingly. It's only when you have evidence of literally any kind that you make a move and you make it quick, but you do not drag them in because then it might set off anywhere you haven't found yet. Fancy is actually doing the smart thing by just letting them off and making it look like a vacation for a little bit while they sort things out, finding any possible links, and then maybe even implying that they can come right back to work and then pouncing in case you find something. Interviews wouldn't happen at this stage by any measure.
>>25723320
...how did Caddy get worse at princessing?
>>25728688
Let's just be grateful she recognized the colors as colors this go around.
Call it a moral victory.
>>25728706
I can't tell if that was a subtle hint that she was working on that or a clever way to have her say "The nice four foot one?"
It's weird when it's smart both ways.
>>25728185
Her and Mane-iac, weirdly enough.
>SP
"41"
>Mmph. (This situation is less than optimal.)
"Mmph hmph." (I concur.)
>Mmph mmph mmmph. (My captain is a tyrant.)
"Mmph." (I concur)
>Mmmph mph mmmhhmmhmph. (And the Titan is of low lineage, descended from grubs.)
"Mmph." (I concur)
>Mmmph hmmph hmph. (I don't think we can actually understand each other)
"Mmph." (I concur)
>Mmph. (Indeed)
Good night, thread
>>25729877
Good... Something aon
Good morning thread.
>>25730824
Good morning to you too pal
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Applejack"
'???'
[???]
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and I'm giving a behind the scene look. Now it's time for...LIFE IN THE DREAMHOUSE:BACKSTAGE EDITION!!!
AJ walks in on Pinkie who's in the kitchen.
>Oh hey AJ! You're early! So for the skit I'm thinking of having you break a bottle of Applejack Daniels into the pot.
"Can ya get the bottles for me then?"
>Sure! It should be in the liquor cabinet...here you go!
She turns around and gets stomped by a giant foot from a dream eater.
>Ungh!
"Hello there. I'm a big fan of your show by the way."
Pinkie struggles and grunts under his foot.
>Forceful aren't we?
"When you're hungry, tact can be thrown out. I've been dying to know what your shadow taste like."
He takes a big wiff of Pinkie.
"...hm where's your shadow? Can't even smell a hint of it. You don't have any fears or anything?"
>My shadow caused some trouble, so I ate it.
"Wait, you ate your shadow? You didn't slay it, or merged with it? You forced it into you by eating it? ...How odd. Shouldn't the hunger make you..."
He begins to notice the food motif of the Dreamhouse.
"Ha ha...hahaha you're either lucky, or more clever than you look. Oh well, we'd still eat ponies like you anyway. I guess I'll have to skip the best part and have you."
His jaw dislocates and opens wide.
['LUNAR JUSTICE!']
Three spears pierce right through the Dream Eater and black liquid oozes out of it's mouth.
"Blurgh...so the moon rises."
He disappears in a pillar of light. Luna and 2 other night guards step forward.
'Thank goodness we made it in time. Is thou all right?'
>Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little frazzled.
[Your majesty, we must keep moving. She's not the only one.]
>Is something wrong?
'The situation is under control. Continue the show.'
>But-
A door opens.
'Stay out of trouble.'
Luna and the guards walk through and shut it behind them.
>...hmm...I wonder what he meant?
>>25731247
That either you are totally right, or really wrong. I'm betting on the latter
OOCO
>AJ
"Celestia"
~~~~
>Hey, Tia? Gotta question.
"And I have..."
>...
"...Huh. I'm surprisingly out of something to use here. I think I've exhausted all of my threats."
>So-
"No! I'm serious! I think I'm totally out of things to threaten you with! Totally bereft of any means of retaliation!"
>Ah-
"I... I feel so vulnerable, so weak! I didn't feel this weak when I was shot! This is a nightmare, this is the worst! Oh dear mother I have nothing left to shoot you with or threaten you with!"
>... the horror?
"I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING! AHHHHHHHHHH!"
*CRASH*
>Uh... wow. Poor gal, never realized Ah was puttin so much strain on-WAIT A DANG MINUTE!
"SUCKERRRRRRRrrrrrrr...."
>... you win this round, Celly.
OOCO
>SA
"Chrysalis"
'Celestia'
~~~
>Okay, so we're all clear. First one to make it down the slope in one piece is the winner. And no using immortality!
"...how... how do we do that, exactly?"
>If you start rolling, don't be immortal.
'So... so-'
>So fall apart, yes.
"...So in the event that we, during this very fast race down the side of a dangerous mountain, slip or otherwise fall, you wish us to stop being immortal for a set time."
>Yep.
'All so that, when we fall, we will break into a bunch of pieces.'
>Correct.
"...That sounds awful!"
'Yeah, who would want to live in a situation where they couldn't use badass superpowers to easily survive something horrific?'
"Right? This isn't even a concern for us, we're not even going to feel it."
'It might actually be fun, even!'
"Why would we..."
>...
"...Oh..."
'...oh...'
>...
"'...NAHHHHH! READYSETGO!"
>...Sniffle...
>>25732258
....idon'tgeddit
>>25732292
What, really?
>Shiny says not to be immortal and cheat to win the competition
>Celly and Chrysalis laugh and imply not being immortal would suck
>#nowings
>>25732258
>I'LL SHOW THEM!
~~~~~~~
"What did we learn?"
>...
'That you can't answer with a bad concussion?
"..y-yes..."
>AJ
~~~~
They say that there are five stages of grief. A set progression one goes through in a bad situation that explains what they will be feeling and in what way they will be feeling it. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, if she remembered them right.
Well, she must've gotten them mixed up somehow. Because, after a bit of sitting there on the ground and feeling like the acceptance that the tree was simply not going to help her was right around the corner, something quite different happened.
>...You friggen tree.
Something that made her shoot to her limbs, made her snarl with anger, made her head start to throb with anger.
>You gad dang... backstabbin'...
Something that made her turn her attention away from her thoughts, and back to someone who deserved it more.
Or rather, something.
>Of all the low down dirty no good times fer' you to pull this, you choose now!
Something that was going to listen in silence while she screamed her head off at it. And it would, without saying a word.
Because it was a tree.
>Of all the times ya' could've chosen, ya' pick now ta' up and decide not ta' help us! Was it one too many, ya' friggen tree!? Did ya' just get tired of it? Oh, Ah'm sorry that Ah' actually did the legwork and put mah' life in danger instead of hiding under a castle ta' save the world! So sorry that Ah' actually want to go out there and fix stuff instead of waitin' for something ta' ask me for a bit of the endless power Ah' got inside of me that can solve every problem! Was it too much? Did we save the world one too many times? Was that it? Should we have just let it rot!? Well!
She didn't know what she was doing when she turned around, and she could no longer stop it.
>Ah'mn sorry!
Even as every braincell not drowned by rage screamed at her with the shrieks of a thousand wild animals, she could not stop it.
>That Ah'!
She could not stop it, even as she shifted all of her weight to her forelegs.
>Even tried!
1/2
>>25732594
She could not stop it, no matter how foolish she knew it to be, no matter how blasphemous or downright unsettling it was, no matter how little sense it made or how much more she could do.
She could not stop it, as she cocked her hind legs back.
Because when a tree was being stubborn, there was only one thing Applejack, not the princess or the Element bearer, Applejack of the farm of Sweet Apple Acres knew what to do. There was only one thing her granny and her parents and her brother taught her to do when some tree was being a right fighter about dropping that last thing she wanted. There was only one thing the farm pony knew how to do.
Because, no matter how fancy, no matter how magical, no matter how strange it looked, when it got right down to it....
It was just a tree.
>BUCK YOU YA' FRIGGEN TREE!
THUCK!
It hit her, after the recoil sting stopped shooting down her legs, just what it was she had done. For a time, she remained there, frozen, almost not comprehending what had just happened, confused like she had been replaced by an alien entity for that short time, and only now had returned.
She waited, in silence, for her brain to fully take hold, and comprehend.
>...Uh...
Pip!
What little brain power she had returned to her went away yet again, fleeting like a cool wind on a hot day, when she heard something drop next to her. When she heard something softly hit the ground just to her side.
Her brain stopped working altogether when she saw an apple next to her.
>W-...what.
An apple had dropped from the tree.
It was a red, bright, shining apple.
No... not shining. An almost angry looking red
Just a hue off, just enough to look wrong.
>...what.
It was a pity, that she could think so little, understand so little, believe so little. She knew time was wasting away, but nothing, seemingly nothing, would bring her back to earth, and reality. Nothing would make her move again.
"Where... are my... changelings."
Except for that.
>>25732603
....I'm sorry, I don't think I read that right. Let me just read that again.
Oh my, I seem to have misread that again, one second.
Huh! There must be something wrong with me, because for some reason my brain keeps misinterpreting that to say Applejack applebucked the Tree of Harmony!
Oh, brain! You silly thing!
>>25732603
>Bucking the tree of harmony
That is either the dumbest or most hardcore thing Applejack has ever done.
I'm including catching a motherfucking nuke in space.
>>25732680
And then chrysalis showed up...so she can make things not worse.
...soda down!
Soda Down!
>>25732603
NC
>...Oh, Chrysalis?
"Where are they"
>The changelings? Oh, yeah, they're in Ponyville....s'bit tense there, cos...y'know, Chitanias there.
"Why"
>...Y'all remember 13?
"...Yes"
>Weeeeeeeeeeeeeelll...
"Well what?"
>You know here better than ah' do, so y'all can deal with that. Mahself on the other hand-
"What"
>-Have t' figure out what this apple is tryna tell me
Plop
>Tell me your secretssssssssssssssssssss
>>25732603
>Kick god tree
>Get apple
Seems legit.
>>25732603
It was all worth it. Nobody, no matter how much we debate, no matter how much we argue, no matter how much we fight, will ever be able to convince me that this whole thing, Aj's inner turmoil and all that included, was not worth it.
Seeing Applejack KICK THE TREE OF HARMONY made this whole trip worth it and so, so, so much more.
>>25732603
And AJ officially became the rawest pony ever.
She bucked the damn tree of harmony. Yeah, no, she has all the stones.
>>25732941
...kicking a tree? That's unmitigated awesome to you? Kicking a giant crystal tree?
Seriously?
>>25732833
>.s'bit tense there, cos...y'know, Chitanias there.
"Oh, that's the only reason?"
>...well the mob probably has somethin' ta' do with it, actually?
"MOB!?"
>Hold up! Ah' got apples to interrogate! Now... are you a red gala or a red delicious? Ah' gotta know!... No it ain't racist!
>>25732978
I'm sorry, is straight up kicking the single most powerful entity in MLP entirely like it was a common apple tree not awesome to you? Is bucking the thing that has repeatedly curbstomped literally every threat to Equestria it's been put up against with only some of it's power not awesome?
It's not a giant crystal tree, it's the motherfucking Tree of Harmony, it's the thing that makes Discord piss himself because even phenomenal cosmic powers can't prevent him from becoming that things bitch, and she straight up kicked the thing so hard it dropped an apple despite not even being a fruit tree.
No fucking shit it's awesome.
>>25732978
>just a crystal tree
Dude it's-
>>25733032
Thank you.
>>25733032
But like, it doesn't DO anything.
It gets used but it doesn't really do stuff itself.
Like a nuke is awesome but plutonium is just, well...plutonium.
>>25733066
>But like, it doesn't DO anything.
Because no villain, no matter how cocky, is dumb enough to go start some shit with it.
They hide away because they know it's literally so strong it could kill them just by being in the same room.
Unlike Applejack, who was so close she could kick it, and then kicked it.
This isn't plutonium, it's a nuke that makes little nukes you can use to go blow up the badguys with friendship, and AJ just kicked the mama nuke.
>>25733111
Do any villains even know it exists beyond dizzy?
And it has never taken an aggressive action of any kind. It's been harvested for weapons, it dropped out a super saiyan/insta castle box but it isn't like an ent or something. It just kinda sits there. More a source of power than an actor.
I mean for a crowning moment of awesome 'she got huffy and kicked a tree that showed no signs of response let alone retaliation' just does not really compare with 'she rode the Titan into battle against a horde of zombies to topple the enemy tower an was hurled into the air to catch the fungi nuke which she then plunged down through reentry the full fire and fury of the atmosphere raging around her obliterating her for and saving both this planet and others beyond.'
I guess if this does it for you that's fine, but I just don't see it.
Works great to illustrate her mental/emotional state and provide a mcguffin, but not exactly what I'd call climactic. Now slapping Faust across the face with a bass fish...that'd be a thing.
>>25733173
Foe. obliterating her foe. Stupid phone.
>>25733173
More, crowning moment of crazy awesome.
It's awesome BECAUSE it's so fucking crazy and absurd, that I can't help but admire it and even now think it's probably the best moment I've seen in over 10+ threads. It's just so insane that APPLEJACK of all ponies would break down to the point where she would look to what is essentially the source of mega-magic in Equestria, and reach a point where she just straight up kicks the thing, it's awesome.
Your example is most certainly more awesome on a general scale, you'll never hear me argue that one and still to this day remains my fav AJ moment out of the series, but in that she was saving the world, being heroic and doing the right thing. Here? She's not doing the right thing, she's doing the crazy thing. She's doing the thing that is too fucking crazy to even consider on a normal basis. I could see AJ go block that bomb every single day of the week and sunday too, but imagining a scenario where she kicks something that, for all she knows, is going to use those weapons she herself used to wipe out godlike entities on her is another thing entirely.
I don't know if it's climactic, since with Chrysalis there it's obviously not the end of that scene, but it's for sure a scene I never thought I'd see, and is so fucking balls-out crazy it's awesome.
>Lavan
"32"
'88'
[Acty]
{JJ}
~Daw~
~~~~
>So, you can appear to be anything, at any time?
"If this is going to transition into some kind of disguise control regiment..."
'My body, my choice!'
>I was merely wondering, can you become another gender as well?
"Sadly, no."
'...wait, sadly?'
[I see the appeal.]
'...WHAT!?'
~HA HA!~
[What? I think it would be neat if JJ could become a girl at any moment!]
'...'
{I think that would be pretty cool too, thinking about it. We could do shenanigans}
~...Wait, what? Am I missing something here?~
"But the answer is no."
>Why not?
"Because we can't re-write our internal organs? Can't reattach splits in our skin on a whim?... Other reasons?"
>Oh.
"..."
>But if you could do that-
"I'd rather not. There's only one place I want to be the mare, thank you."
>Where is that?
"..."
'...'
[...Yeah, where?]
{Like...in a pageant?}
~Okay, seriously, are they fucking with us?~
"The thing that function like no mortal being ever could?"
~Meant those two.~
"So did I."
>...I did not receive an answer.
~Trust me, lad, for the best.~
>Oh, okay.
[...This is going to bug me all day.]
>>25732603
If you were trying to appease me for hijacking Chrysalis's by having AJ do something as stupid awesome as kicking the treeit worked
I'm actually being serious, I wanted to do an AJ/Chrysalis confrontation myself with that, but I'm just happy it's getting done and it ties into the over-arching development plot.
>>25733600
I was legit worried about that, I really was, and I do apologize for essentially hijacking her thing with the whole "Don't screw it up" section, but it was an opportunity I could not pass up.
I was actually really worried with the gryphon thing back last thread because I was like "oh shit, how am I going to make this work?" but when you had her take off, I had to take it. Like I said, I'm sorry, but I hope the coming parts will show why this had to be Chrysalis, it simply had to. With what's coming next it had to, thematically, character wise and continuity wise, it HAD to be Chrysalis.
Like I said, I am sorry, but I assure you this isn't what was mentioned last thread with a just short nothing in order to prevent the storyline from going down ways I don't want it to and forcing the hard stuff on the people who were writing it, I'm not hijacking it and going to leave a mess in your lap to untangle I promise, it is just a matter of what comes next needs this character, specifically, to get the most impact. She had a reason, I swear it and I will do my best to prove it!
Sorry again, but it's dangerous and my Apple Princess can't go alone, so I need to take this.
>>25733733
Nahhh, like I said, it's cool! I wanted a Chrysalis/AJ confrontation as well, though I wasn't sure if you were going to broach it yourself.
So long as it's for AJ development and it's clearly as well thought out as that, you hijack away motherfucker.
>Celestia
"Twilight"
'Rarity'
[Dash]
{Pinkie}
~~~~~
>... and that's essentially it.
Somehow, even long explanation preceding it just plain did not seem to do it justice. They had been there for the better part of an hour recapping exactly what had happened, and yet the four of the once defenders of Equestria felt they knew so very little of what had happened, or why.
Only one thing was clear, regardless.
"So, we're getting kicked out for..."
>A week, maybe? Maybe less? Could only take a couple days.
"And Eqeustria is going to..."
>Still be fine, so long as this doesn't run over two weeks? All the funding and paychecks for this month are already processing. Mind, I am also assuming that the giant butter-turkey from eight hundred years ago does not return, but aside from something like that stomping through everything should be fine.
She said this, of course, but she couldn't help but notice a certain other alicorn in the room looked quite less sure.
'Are you... certain this isn't going to leave an opening for that mare, Celestia?'
>Quite. Fancy is not one to blindly see things in every corner, we should be fine.
It never ceased to unsettle them when they didn't hear absolute certainty in the princess's voice.
"They're not going into my lab, are they?"
>Fortunately no, I managed to convince everyone that the investigation need not be allowed into private information. I merely... failed to specify that this broad term also included changelings and or privately funded lab experiments. They'll have full access to see what you purchased and why when you used Equestrian funds, but until they can confirm anything and have it cleared, they can't access that room.
"Phew. Good."
[Sooo, what, we're just out of a job for a couple days slash weeks?]
>It appears so, yes.
{THE HORROR!}
>...Pinkie, you don't do anything for the crown.
{Sure I do! I throw parties!}
>But not on our dime.
{...}
>...Right?
{...Equestria needs parties, Celly.}
1/2
>>25734165
'So... what do we do in the meantime?'
>...I dunno.
[Okay, can we all agree that the princess going 'dunno' is weird?]
'Yes.'
"Very."
{I like it!}
>It's not that weird!
The silence said it all.
>HMPRH! Well, fine then! I have no idea what shall we do upon this time wherein we are bereft of our status and funds, empty is my head as I wonder to the thoughts of the days that shall pass free of work as the machinations of a mare take hold, nothing to be done but rising of the sun for the days that shall be, for in this time, we are free.
Slow, respectful applause followed her.
>I thank you.
"But seriously... what are we going to do?"
{...Throw a party?}
Slow, much less respectful looks followed the other.
{I am not a complicated mare...}
>>25734173
Well? What are we planning?
Beach episode?
...Please beach episode?
>>25734279
I'm down with it.
Once AJ's thing wraps up just have everyone go on a vacation.
>>25734347
Wouldn't mind it at all. Just everyone going to the beach being like "Who the fuck cares"
Meanwhile, EVERYTHING IS GOING WRONG IN EQUESTRIA!
>>25734347
Unless shenanigans unveal Tweelot's bug research etc etc
Thant and I'm still unsure what 13's ulterior motives in Ponyville are other than "Stop abusing my hive REEEEEEEEEEE" right now
>>25734389
>Unless shenanigans unveal Tweelot's bug research etc etc
Leading to Twience run rampant? Oh baby, you know how to get me going.
>Thant and I'm still unsure what 13's ulterior motives in Ponyville are other than "Stop abusing my hive REEEEEEEEEEE" right now
So then what's the problem? That you don't know?
>>25734532
>So then what's the problem? That you don't know?
Cos as far as I know, 13 has been "Up" to "Something" since she arrived in Ponyville, secretly "Working" on some kind of "Plan" that involves a lot of subtle Mindzotzing. And using Chitania as a bouncer; which is never a sign that what is going on is cool.
If there's a reveal, I hope it's soon
>>25734592
Uh...does that include her asking Pommel to help Chitty with the paper airplane in the eye?
Because I didn't intend that to be the case, I just didn't think Pommel was the type to do let that continue.I.E Worse than Hitler
>>25734388>Unlikely heroes Flim/Flam and Redbot 2016
>42
"Spitfire"
~~~~~
>...It's quiet.
"...Yep."
>...too quiet.
"...Yep."
>We need to keep our guard up.
"...Yep"
>Prepare for anything.
"...Yep."
>Well, I'm glad you, as a solider, understand this.
"...Meh, could go either way."
>...
"...Yep."
>You're not even listening to me, are you?
"...Yep."
>Hrm...You want to make out with Eighteen.
"...Yep."
>You want to make out with Cadence.
"...Yep."
>You want to make out with that lamp.
"...Yep."
>You want to make out with Chrysalis.
"...meh, could go either way."
>...W-was... was that a stock answer, or are you serious?
"...Yep."
>Uh... you want to make out with... me?
"...Eh."
>I... I don't want to admit it, but my pride is just a little wounded there.
"...Yep."
>>25735275
I don't know why, but I found that really cute.
>>25732833
>.s'bit tense there, cos...y'know, Chitanias there.
"Are... are you sure that's the biggest concern?"
>Well, Ah' also kinda stood by while a mob formed and didn't do nothin' when they arrived, then Ah' screamed a whole bunch and ran off cause Ah' didn't wanna deal with it no more. That probably didn't help.
"..."
>...But pretty sure Ah' can blame this one on 13 and Chitania cause they were there and iffin' Ah' had just waited another hour or so Ah' probably would'a just divined the answer or someone else would'a came to solve it for me.
"..."
>...Probably.
"...'
>...Ah' got an apple.
"APPPPPPLLLLLLLEEEEEEEJJJJJJAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!"
>NOT AGAIN! SAVE ME APPLE!
..
>AH'VE BEEN BETRAYED-GLK!
OOCO
>Spike
‘Twilight’
Twilight found her assistant after hours in the office of the Apple Princess where he continued filling out, filing, and reviewing basic forms.
>Check box 82B, allocate 300 bits, stamp, check, date, and stamp…
‘Hey spike’
>and into the out pile it goes. Next request, 5000 bits for brass doorknob replacements for the library…5000? Did they say brass or gold!? Denied.
‘Uh…Spike?’
>yet another petition to repeal the blowjob law…Why did we allow that to stick around again? Eh, screw it. Standard procedure is to…..Denied.
‘Spike. Spike the Dragon. Number one Assistant.’
>Oh hey! Request to join one of the harems! And here I thought we’d go a day without. So who’s today’s lucky winner? ….TWO!? Seriously!? I mean she’s not even FROM here! This is completely improperly filed!
‘...’
>Also horrendously illegal and likely to get Shiny arrested for murder. Off to Pommel it goes!
<fwoosh>
‘…wow…’
>And next up is a request for extra funds for hands on research experiments into deviant-
‘SPPPIIIIIKE!!!!’
>AH!
He shot in to the air in surprise scattering papers everywhere.
“Hey Spike!”
To find himself caught in Arana’s web.
>Arana.
“How’ve you been?”
>Good…good. You?
“I mostly just hang around.”
>Ha.
“AHEM!’
> …Twilight!?
‘Hi.’
>…what’s up?
‘Oh…well…you know. I was thinking about that whole ‘cave’ thing…
>the one where that you masterminded and nearly got me killed?
‘Not letting that go are you?’
>Not quickly.
‘Like you never made a mistake Mr. greased chicken rollercoaster!’
>YOU SWORE YOU’D NEVER TELL! IT ALMOST WORKED!
‘No. No it did not.’
>…Sigh. What did you want, exactly?
‘Oh. It’s not about what I want. I just want to ask you a question.’
>Well, looks like I’m stuck up here a while. Ask away.
‘How would you like….to fly?’
>…Arana? Get me down.
>>25735570
>Turns out she had to eat the apple
>This thought literally never occurred to her.
Tell me you wouldn't believe it.
That said, while I know some of us are hopeful this solves all the problems, am I the only one a little worried? Like, okay, it's MLP, so a macguffin shooting everything okay isn't exactly a strange happening, but I admit I'm a little worried this will actually have some kind of really super useful power and that will fix this whole thing.
That said, I know others are hoping that's exactly what happens, that it really is a magical apple that just makes this all end, and I understand them so maybe I shouldn't complain. Who knows, might not be so bad.
>>25735972
Sure thing
>Idris
"???"
'???'
~~~~~
It was the heavy burden of a king.
To know that his choices, even that of not making choices, held weight, held ramifications, held power. By not standing and trying to calm down his wife, he had made a choice that had as much, if not more, power than any other he could make.
It was the heavy weight of a king that-
BANG!
... It was the heavy weight of-
BANG BANG BANG.
...The heavy weight of-
BANGBANGBANGBANGBANG
>The heavy weight of my hawk-damned talon up the ass of whoever is making that noise! On my airship!
He did not so much as open the door on said airship as ripped it clean, pieces falling off every which way.
Pieces, and a certain body.
"OH THANK GOODNESS, FATHER!"
>...Zephyrious!?
Of all the bodies to fall out of that storage closet completely nude and sweaty, his eldest was by far the least expected.
Second was-
'GASSSP! AIR! PRECIOUS AIR!'
>...Hilda?
The pair of siblings frantically started fanning themselves, Hilda even going so far as to cling to the air conditioning unit for dear life.
'THAT WAS THE DUMBEST IDEA, BROTHER!'
>Could... could someone fill me in?
"I didn't know they didn't have the ability to unlock from the inside! Why would anyone build that!? That's stupid!"
'I STILL BLAME YOU!'
>I feel lost.
"And how is it my fault that blasted room get so hot!? WHY WOULD THAT HAPPEN!?
'BLAME!'
>Talk to me, here.
"Uggghhhh!.... Well, at least we're going to be landing in the Empire soon, that should cool us off."
>Left that already.
'So all of that... WAS FOR NOTHING!?'
"Erm-"
'BLAMEBLAMEBLAMEBLAMEBLAME-'
With every word, she punctuated it with a hit.
>...They'll tell me in a second.
"OWOWOWOWOW!'
'BLAMEBLAMEBLAMEBLAME!'
>...Annnnny second now.
"OW!"
'BLAME!'
>... I should've been a turnip farmer.
>>25736174
>Wait, where's Siegfried? Don't tell me you left him alone!
"Welll..."
Meanwhile...
-Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! STOP DRAGGING ME YOU ASSHOLE!-
~FUCK YOU! YOU GOT ME DRUNK AND I LOST VEKKY AND I'M NOT LETTING YOU GO UNTIL I FIND HER!~
>>25736174
Don't bother fighting it, Idris.
You will never understand your children.
>>25736224
>The Gryphon kingdom, ruler bereft again
Oh goddamn it.
>>25736804
Citizens of the world: Your Governments Are Out To Lunch!
Be Back Next Week
>>25736804
>Implying Aunt What'sHerFace isn't handling it
Bitch is basically Older Hilda, she knows what's up
>>25736911
>Bitch-Hilda and Fat-Siegfried are now running the gryphon kingdom.
...they're gonna come back to find it on fire, aren't they?
OOCO
>AJ
"SA"
'Spike'
~~~~
>...
"...Go fish."
>Gahhhhh. Friggen, never get what Ah' need
KNOCK KNOCK!
>Shit!
SHOOM!
'Hey, AJ? Shiny? Twilight wants to know if... oh man, did you guys get any sleep last night?'
"Can't talk, Spike! We're on a roll!"
>Take a backseat loverboy, we're gettin' this paperwork done!
'Well, you guys are working pretty fast... you sure you don't want any help?'
>Nope!
"I've got the fire in me!"
'Oh, okay. I'll tell Twilight you're going to be a bit longer.'
>Thanks, Sugar Cube!
"DOINGITDOINGITDOINGITDOINGITDOINGITDOINGIT... is he gone?'
>He's gone.
"Phew... got any sixes?"
>Ya'll looked when he came in!
"You can never prove that."
>Gaaahhhh... here.
"Woot! I win that round!"
>Fine, fine. Ya' win.
"You know what that meeeannss..."
>Sigh... fine, Ah'll go get the Dorothy costume.
"Ha ha!"
>What happens iffin' he comes back?
"Then you are going to have some explaining to do, aren't you?"
>...This is revenge fer' the stockings, ain't it?
"Chrysalis did not leave me alone for a month."
>Heh... alright, new game!
"You think they'll catch on we finished all the work like three hours ago?"
>Ya' think anyone else sides yer' dang personal paperwork bug is dumb enough ta' look at it fer' too long?
"...Wanna play poker this time?"
>Now yer' talkin'!
"Not strip poker."
>DANG IT!
>>25737133
And the little sick gryphon kid managed to stowaway with Watchdog and Sig.
>>25737405
>>Ya'll looked when he came in!
...Aj.
AJ.
Applejack.
Applerooney
Jack-Apple.
App to the Le to the Jack.
Why does that fucking matter.
Do you not know how go fish works.
Applejack stahp.
>>25737133
>ONLY on fire
>>25737413
So, in addition to everything going to shit, his overprotective mother is going to freak.
>>25737486
She was probably lying, and he gave her that "Oh yeah, I got you now" after asking a bunch of times.
AJ cheats like a mofo at cards, you know.
>>25735972
Nah, I'm not worried.
Guy hasn't skimped yet, he's obviously thought the plot out, he'll handle it.
>>25737499
>HOW DID CHITANIA GET OVER HERE!?
"...That's actually a good question. Wasn't I in Ponyville a second ago?... OH GODDAMN IT NOT AGAIN!"
>>25738713
Huh. You know, Faustmom missed a really easy way to fuck with Chitty by sending her into some place she's still barred from.
>>25737405
These two work well together, I like their moments.
>>25739327
They do really work as two fellows who are just frequently forced to do stuff just to keep the place running. If she were still earth pony, they would be a perfect pair
>>25739109
Doesn't work unless you stopped thinking about it and become aimless
Morning, thread
>>25741052
Morning anon
>tfw no new episode to make one shots with.
>56
“Jetset”
~~~~
>So then my ‘cuz is all like “doth thine daftness know no bounds?” and then I go “I bound over booty all the time!” which totally causes him to do this flinch thing he always does when I get ‘im real nice—like he goes like this, see? Saw that? I’ll do it again even tho’ it hurts ‘cause it’s really hard to do and looks like he broke somethin’ upstairs but I make ‘im do it all the time especially this one time when I told ‘im how I wondered into this one place with lotsa fancy dressed mares who thought I was cool an’ stuff an’ started givin’ me all kindsa kisses an’—
Listening to this bug ramble on and on about his cousin, another bug for whom Jetset had already garnered a great amount of dislike towards by proxxy, wouldn’t have been so terrible had he not glitched himself into a tree and was currently at the mercy of the younger bug to cut him out.
Using a rock with sharp edges.
>-think he should jus’ go ahead and settle down with Ziggs already ‘cause ya know it’s gonna happen so he should jus’ quit playin’ games an’ put a ring on that booty ‘fore some other guy comes along and does it ‘cause I tell ya there ain’t no worse feelin’ than bein’ booty-swiped and jus’ between you and me Ziggs has one heckuva plot like it’s not as big as not-moms or applebutt’s but it’s far more exotic—
1/2
>>25741900
“Faust? Faust please… if you are indeed up there and watching and listening, then please please please render this child mute.”
Shockingly, his prayer went unheeded and Fifty-Six continued without an apparent need for breath.
That is, until the driest of branches snapped under the weight of a carefully trodding hoof and both stallion and bug glanced back.
>Huh...? Oh! Hey there! How ya’ doin’?
“Who is it? I can’t see. Is it someone come to kill us? Can they stab me in the eardrums first?”
>Hahaha, don’t mind this guy stuck in the tree, miss new lady mare, he’s jus’ bein’ silly.
‘Oh, don't worry, dear, I’m fully aware of just how silly—or rather, how unprofessional—this boy can be.’
>Fffffffuuuuuuuu-
>>25741908
Ha!
These two work really well as a pair.
>>25741908
Are you there god?
It's me, agent murderboner. Please help?
<things get worse>
...yeah. This makes sense. Lots and lots of sense
>Idris
"Zephyrious"
'Hilda'
~~~~
>I cannot believe you two!
"Yes you can."
'This is quite behavior of us.'
"I cannot count how many times we've snuck into something to join you in your foreign visits."
'Mostly because when we started, we literally couldn't count.'
>Do you not understand the political turmoil we're in!?
"Actually, we do."
'And we literally just had the speaker for our gods go "Hail Gryphonia".'
"We're sitting rather pretty."
>Who's running the kingdom!?
"Siegfried I suppose for the... few hours?"
'Or rather, our dear aunt.'
"She knows a thing or two about running a kingdom."
>...Stop being sensible!
"Gabbldygoo."
'Labbulululu.'
"'Habberdashhherfingfangfoom."'
>...
"..."
'...'
>...Heh.
"Distraction successful."
'Power of teamwork.'
BRO-CLAW.
OOCO
>SA
"AJ"
~~~~~
>I want full power to the forward cannons, now! That devil in the hat may have gotten a shot in or two, but she's not taking another scrap of our fort from us!
"Now, Ah' know yer' scared, Ah' know, it seems hopeless, that dang bubblehorse just blocks everything we do and he comes right back at us just as hard. But we're apples, gaddang it! When the goin' gets tough, we buck harder! We're gonna break down that wall, iffin' its the last thing we do!"
>Stallions, it has been a pleasure working with you.
"Ah' love you all... charrrrge!"
>They're at the gates! Forward batteries, fire! Pew pew pew pew!
"NOOO! Sargent Appletree! Ah'll avenge you! Fire the catapults! SHOOM!"
>Hit the deck! Ahhhh!.... Is everyone alr- no... no! Captain paperclip! Not captain paperclip! Nooooooo!
"Their moral is weakened, go for it!'
>On the contrary! I have one final trick!
"What in tarnation is... GREAT TARNATION HE'S GOTTA BOMB!"
FIZZZ
POP!
"Ahhhh! Oh dear lord, the limbs are everywhere! No! Nooooo! Ah' lead them to their dooms!"
>Sooo, Princess Applemeister! You thought you could defeat me, did you? Claim my land for your own? Well, instead I take you as my prisoner!
"Ah'... Ah' admit defeat."
>Ha ha! Get into the dungeon!
"...Shiny, Ah'm not gonna fit in yer' paperwork fort with you."
>Wait till the afternoon rush, we could damn near restructure my entire office by then.
"Well, Ah'm loose till then."
>...laser tag?
PEW
"YER IT!"
>SON OF A-
>>25742471
...Fuck that's cute.
>>25742471
Damn it, heart, you come back online right now!
>Applejack
"Chrysalis"
~~~~~
Every syllable was like a blade across a leather swath as it sharpened it.
"Where... are my... changelings."
Her tongue practically dripped venom from it's tip, a sickly green color as unsettling as her unnatural flame.
"Where... are my... changelings."
Every step was heavy, every step was strong.
Every step struck something deeper and deeper within her.
>Ah... Ah'...
"You... what."
It was not a question.
>....Ah'm sorry.
She watched, saw every second of it, and she understood not a moment.
She saw it bubbling underneath her face, the very thing she expected to see. The rage, the hate, the anger, the disgust, so many emotions warring and threatening to spill out like and explosion that would consume everything.
She watched, and she did not understand, for she saw the Queen of all things seemed to be fighting it. She watched, and she did not understand, why the changeling did not simply snap as she had done before and rush over to strangle her, choke the life out of her as she had in a time still fresh in her memory. She watched, and she did not understand. Not an instant of it.
Not when her snarl twisted until it looked downright abhorrent, yet she did not move. Not when her eyes filled up with sickly, unnatural looking veins within them. Not when her whole body was wracked with shakes that vibrated so powerfully even the stream of spittle running down the side of her mouth vibrated.
She watched, and she did not understand a second of it.
Or, later, a word of it.
"Don't make it worse... don't make it worse... don't make it worse..."
She did not understand any of it.
But that did not mean she did not see an opening when she was given one.
>Chrysalis, look, Ah'm... Ah'm sorry, okay? Ah'm sorry... you were right, okay? You were right, and Ah' couldn't do anything, and-
"I believed you."
Three words, each one blacker than the hide of the one who spoke it.
Three little words filled with so much hate.
1/3
>>25743081
"I actually believed you when you said you would look after them... I actually believed you... "
She punctuated every letter, like a knife stabbing in deep.
"I..."
Whatever was holding her back seemed to be breaking. There was power, quite a lot of it, distorting the air around her, making it look warped and unnatural as it took on a terrible hue. The tips of her hair curled upwards, seemingly ready to rise at any moment, dancing with barely contained magic. Magic quite powerful, that she knew from experience she simply could not match.
"I actually..."
Eyes that had clenched shut snapped back open, and looked to the pony with more hate then she had ever seen in her entire life.
>Chrysalis... Chrysalis stop...
Instead, the Queen took one long, powerful step forwards.
She shuffled back, feeling fear, real fear, for the first time in as long as she could remember. She instinctively moved back to the tree, seeking it's warmth, seeking it's protection. It granted nothing, remaining as stationary as it had before in her desperate time. It would not use it's power, it would not use it's magic, nothing as the Queen advanced another stride.
And another, and another.
>C-Chrysalis, calm down, listen, Ah'...
And another and another and another and another each stepping faster and faster.
>Chrysalis stop! Come on... calm down now, this ain't, Ah' mean it ain't like they're just...
Those eyes of red stayed on her, never leaving, never wavering, honed in a like a bull striding to an end point he would soon gore.
"I believed you."
>Chrysalis! Ah'm sorry! Okay! Just go take yer' changelings! Ah' won't bother you again! Ah'm sorry!
Soon, all too soon, the Queen was close.
"I BELIEVED YOU!"
Soon, all too soon, the obsidian thing was directly over her.
>Calm down, please! Maybe this can all go away!
Soon, all too soon, that hoof, raised up, to do what she could only guess.
"YOU LIED TO ME!"
>It ain't that bad!
Soon... nothing came.
"...Okay."
2/3
>>25743092
Soon, her world came crashing down.
>W-w... what?
Her eyes, previously clenched shut in expectations of being struck, ever so slowly cracked open. Slowly, just enough for the luminous light of the tree to sting when her muscles painfully pulled her eyelid away, and showed her a sight she thought she would never see.
Chrysalis, her face completely blank.
Not emotionless, as had been on many, many an occasion, no. Blank.
Completely blank.
>...What did you say?
"I said okay."
She swore she could see the flicks of light all around her move, so slow was her world that even the concept of luminosity itself had slowed down as her mind raced at unnatural speeds to try and process what she had seen. Was still seeing now.
Nothing, no matter how long she looked at it, made even a scrap of sense.
"Are the changelings okay?"
>...Yes?
She, of course, had absolutely no way of knowing this. She admitted that, to herself. She fully admitted that just as likely as them peacefully walking away, it was likely that someone had started a fight that had ended with one or more of them hurt. If anything, her exit might've been what set it off.
"Okay."
But the blank faced, soundless changeling did not argue in the least. That one word was all she said, and that one word was all she would give.
>...What... what...
She felt it, before she saw it. A hum, a tingle on her hooves, a strange feeling all along the hairs on her legs.
It took everything she had, every scrap of willpower, every drop of her earth pony strength, to tilt her head down. She was rewarded for her effort, as she had been in the past.
For in her hooves, she could see that apple that had fallen, that thing she had knocked from the Tree in her anger. That apple, in her hooves.
Glowing, in an unnatural, almost angry looking red.
>...Huh. Ah' was just gonna eat you.
>>25743103
So it's a... mind control apple?
Or does it make everything she says true?
HOW DO YOU WORK, MAGIC APPLE THAT WAS KICKED OUT OF A NOT-FRUIT TREE!?
>>25743103
>Chrysalis once again on the cusp of murderizing Applejack
And ya wander why I never liked her
>>25743166
>So it's a... mind control apple?
Maybe it's a warped aspect of the EOHonesty, and it makes her obey dishonesty or something?
>>25743218
Oh come on. She was feeling utterly betrayed by someone she FINALLY put her trust in, and now her changelings are who knows where and in who knows what shape. Not just one of them this time, but over a dozen! Of course she's super pissed.
This one is actually way more justified than 12, as this time it was Applejack directly causing it by hauling ass, not negligence.
>>25743166
>inb4 Nightmare Eris
...it's the only real Apple-related bad thing I could think of.
>>25743246
>and now her changelings are who knows where and in who knows what shape. Not just one of them this time, but over a dozen! Of course she's super pissed.
So why didn't she show up in Ponyville first to see if they weren't in several discombobulated pieces?
Why'd she TP right conveniently to where AJ was?
>>25743246
Much as I hate to admit it because this is going to annihilate whatever burgeoning...not friendship exactly, civility? Mutual respect? You get the idea, they had...this guy has a point. She beat feet when she was supposed to watch them.
Choo-choo. There are no breaks on this rape train.
>>25743270
The magic of narrative convenience is a thing. Some days you just have to roll with it.
>>25743270
>So why didn't she show up in Ponyville first to see if they weren't in several discombobulated pieces?
She doesn't know they're in Ponyville, AJ just arrived there the day all this happened.
>Why'd she TP right conveniently to where AJ was?
Because she's clearly got a way to find AJ? Why else would she fly into Everfree?
She was looking for her lings when she took off, and landed right with Applejack. So, she's got some kind of tracker on AJ or something, and thus spotted her sans lings.
>>25743368
Awww man, that actually makes me feel worse. She was probably like "Well I'll be damned, AJ did get them somewhere safe after all! HAH!" when she found out AJ was near the TOH.
And it makes me feel extra worse because this means she just looked for AJ, and didn't even bother checking to make sure all the lings were there with her(No doubt she has a way to find them too), just saw AJ was in a fortified place and went right there.
Wow, this got worse somehow.
>>25743081
"Where... are my... changelings."
>THERE IN PONYVILLE!
"...Why...."
>COS...cos... Ah' thought they'd come t' like them...
"...What happened to them..."
>Ah...Ah' dunno
"WHY DON'T YOU KNOW!"
>COS AH' RAN AWAY! AH' DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
"RAAAAAAAAAAGH"
>WAIT!...Did...Did you not check on them? Why'd y'all come to me?
"..."
>You...you didn't even try an' see them?
"...No, you're responsible."
>..But... They're yours an'...
"...Uuuh"
>Uuuuuh
"..."
>...
CRACK
>>25743446
>Why'd y'all come to me?
"BECAUSE I'M A MORON WHO THOUGHT YOU WOULD STILL HAVE ALL OF THEM! GEE! IMAGINE THAT!"
>...Okay, point. Kinda makes me look like the jackass here.
"No no, I'm clearly the jackass for believing in you. Clearly, I should have assumed that during times of danger you would abandon them. Got too optimistic when I saw you in the single safest place in Eqestria, silly me to think you'd bring them with you here!"
>...Sooo-
"So the minute I finish strangling you and I calm down enough to stop being mad, I'm probably going to go and like... save them."
>Ya' know, yer' wastin' valuable time here.
"TOTALLY WORTH IT!"
>SAVE ME APPLE!
~Kay!~
"Okay."
>...WOO! Apples solve everything!
>>25743166
A magic sounds ingeniously awesome. Fuck, why didn't I think of something like that earlier?
>>25743334
>>25743407
Yeah, don't kid yourselves. We're going to make AJ and Bugbutt continue to be like cats and dogs until the series ends with their inevitable friendship. That's when that'll happen. Up until that point, everything else concerning their relationship will merely be considered stepping stones that fall apart only for the cycle to be repeated.
We'll make them get close, then sever the bond, rinse, repeat (as this right here would be either the second or third time). Makes for good humor and tension, I guess.
>>25743488
>"I'M A MORON WHO THOUGHT YOU WOULD STILL HAVE ALL OF THEM!"
>YEAH ABOUT THAT! GUESS WHO DECIDED TO MAKE AN ENTRANCE AND KEEP THE HIVE ON A LOCKDOWN!
"WHO?"
>CHITANIA! AND 13!
"GODDAMNIT"
>I KNOW RIGHT!
"WHAT THE FUCK DO THEY WANT!"
>LIKE DOGFUCK DO I KNOW! BUT THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL AH' CAN MAKE 'EM CHANGE THERE MIND
"FUCK!"
>DO AH' WANNA GET STOMPED ON?! OR DO AH' WANNA GET MINDFUCKED?! OR MAYBE AH' CAN HAVE BOTH!
"FUCK EVERYTHING! AND FUCK YOU ESPECIALLY!"
>FUCK YOU!
"FUCK YOU!"
>AH'M SO FUCKING DUMB
"AAAAH"
Thoom
>>25743536
>a magic sounds
>a magic APPLE sounds
Stupid coffee-less fingers....
>>25743541
>>YEAH ABOUT THAT! GUESS WHO DECIDED TO MAKE AN ENTRANCE AND KEEP THE HIVE ON A LOCKDOWN!
"...Wait, lockdown? Like, they wouldn't let them leave?"
>No! They wanted to make them leave and take 'em back to you!
"..."
>...It's worse then how Ah'm sayin' it.
>SA
"18"
~~
>Sooooo-
"So we essentially just messed up our banana trade."
>...Are bananas hard to make?
"Only grow in remote locations, Shiny."
>Ah. And the alternative-
"Clear on the other side of the continent."
>...Well, at least Chrysalis will be down one visual aide!
"..."
>I'm trying to look on the bright side here.
"At least our chances of someone being bitten by a banana spider dropped?"
>Do those actually live on bananas?
"..."
>Right, taking the win, sorry.
>Celestia
"???"
'???'
[???]
~~~~
It was the worst thing she had ever seen.
>Oh my... my land is all bunched up now! Oh no, this will take days to fix! Oh... it looked so pretty too, now it's all mashed and deformed. This is the worst thing that could have happened!... Why is there a shadow- OH SHOOT!
Her expectations, and herself, were blown away by something massive landing in front of her.
"Told you the potato would work!"
'...HOW!? Just... science does not work that way!'
[I'm starting to think she's secretly a unicorn.]
"I'm magic, all right!"
'HOW!?'
>...Ahem.
"Princess! We're here to help with the mob!"
>...
"...Where's the mob? Did I scare them off already?"
>...
'...Uh, Princess Celestia, you okay?'
>...
[...Oh wow, that's a big crater.]
"Well, yeah, how else am I supposed to-"
BOOM!
"AHHH!.. MY NEW POWER ARMOR! I JUST GOT THAT!"
>I needed that.
[...thank you.]
'You are a wonderful pony.'
"WHYYYY!?"
So... is the Apple actually a mind controlly dooly?
Or is Bugbutt being... her oddly bipolar self as usual?
>>25744434
That is the question of the day.
Though even Chrysalis normally isn't THIS bipolar, so I'm leaning towards the former.
>>25743103
....Did AJ just mindfuck Chrysalis?HAH! There's something legitimately poetic about that.
>Chitania
"Pommel"
'Haymaker'
~~~~
>...
"..."
'...Hey-'
"Did you learn nothing from me? Have I taught you nothing?"
'I know, I know, but I've got to ask.'
>Your funeral.
"Sigh."
'Look, can you... um...'
>...
'...Can you shrink?'
>...What?
'Shrinking, can you do that?'
>I do it every time I lose my Titan form.
'So then, you can shrink now. Like... smaller?'
>I can take the form of a normal pony, yes.
'I meant like, go tiny.'
>...
"...."
'...'
>...Huh...
'...'
>...I... I don't know...
"...That never occurred to you?"
>Never once.
"...Really?"
>.............
'I think I broke her.'
See, all we needed to do was subtlety shift over to fucking with Bugbut and everything is all better.
>>25745338
>All better
>Not possibly way worse
No yeah, I'm sure that "Angry red" glow and frequent mentions that it looks "Off" can only mean this apple she only obtained out of frustration and demands will be 100 percent happy times.
>>25745431
Not story wise, thread wise. Story is stil spiraling.
>>25744434
Dear god Applejack's going to become the Purplemare!That'd be a crazy good inversion of her element, come to think of it.
>>25745727
>the Purplemare!
the what now
>>25745741
Look up 'The Purpleman'. He's a supervillain where everything he says is mind control.
>AB
"SB"
'SL'
~Winona~
[???]
~~~
>Okay! Ah' think Ah' got the answer ta' the problems!
~Doing the opposite of whatever it is you're thinking? Do that, and get to safety! This is a good plan!~
>Accordin' ta' this here tablet, iffin' a sacrifice is made, then the battle will end!
~...And by end, you for sure mean it'll... blow up or something, right? There's a little picture of a thing blowing up?~
"OH THANK GOODNESS!"
'Finally! We can end this!'
~With it being dead? We know this, right?~
>Now... where are we gonna get a sacrifice...
'...'
"...Why are you both looking at me? Oh! Am I supposed to pick?"
>... she does keep abandoning us.
'Not very loyal, no, Rainbow Dash wouldn't approve.'
"Uh... wow, that's some heavy thinking. Lots of things to consider and ramifications to be thought over. Because if we do this wrong, we shift from well intention laden heroes to villains on the moral scale."
>Maybe iffin' we just pushed her and said she slipped?
'It's better than us dying. I don't want to die. I have a ton to live for!'
>Wait, ya' do?
'...'
>Sorry.
"Hmmm... well, maybe we should look for someone really old? Oh... but then that still doesn't fit the moral quandaries, as all things deserve life. But is one life more inherently valuable than the other? Are we, younger ponies with more life to them, worth more intrinsically than someone who has lived? But doesn't that imply that living is in itself something that determines you are of lesser value? That more living means you are worth less, and yet the potential to live more is of value?"
>On three...
"And that's not even getting into family or medical stuff!"
'One...'
"...Hmmm..."
>Two...
"...OH! I've got it!"
>'Th-'
"YOU! DOWN THERE!"
Down below the beast, an alpaca warrior froze.
[Yeah?]
"Don't stand still and dodge!"
[...wha-}
Just before one of the massive limbs smacked down where he had been.
>'...'
1/2
>>25745843
"There you go! I did the morally right thing, asking him to move so he could survive, but his non-movement provided us with something we required to survive, putting all of the moral ramifications on him, and not us! That way, I can morally state that I told him the best course of action that would ensure his survival, but that he did not follow it is of his own accord, and the paradox of free will is resolved!"
>...
'...W-what...'
~What a load of pony shit.~
"You said it, Winona! Good girl for agreeing with me! Who's a good girl? YOU ARE!"
~I am sworn to not stab the apple. You are not an apple. Tread lightly.~
"YOUSAGOODGIRL!"
>...So, did we win?
Her question was answered, though not in the way she wanted, when massive horns sprouted from the head of the titanic golem, and their already insane height became even worse as the thing grew, and grew, and grew.
'...I think we read that wrong.'
The halo of power floating over the now massive being said 'yes.'
~I TOLD YOU SO!~
The incoherent barking was less so.
"...Bad dog! Why didn't you say something? That was a terrible-OW!"
~I WILL CHEW ON YOUR SKULL AND PUT WHATEVER MAKES THOSE FUN JINGLE SOUNDS IN IT LIKE MAGIC BECAUSE THOSE ARE AMAZING AND FUN AND wow I want one anyone know where we can get a squeaky toy at this hour?~
>"'..."'
~No?... well, that sucks.~
Those down below agreed.
More because of the giant monster pulling out what looked like a gun, but hey, at least they all agreed.
That sucked.
>>25745431
I'm seriously a little hyped over this, what exactly is that apple? How does it relate to her power?
It can't be truly evil, can it? It came from the TOH. You'd think it just downright doesn't have the capability to make something honestly evilHehso what is that thing?
Damn it, the short format makes it easier to read but I am so damn hyped for more!
>>25745860
I do love how even during the craziest of drama, the CMC just have a fun old comedy adventure.
This and LNPP are damn fine works.
>>25746129
I've a theory...It's exactly what she asked for, a handy dandy way to just make everything all better...in a way that would make her a monster. Sure, she can make everyone chill the fuck out, she can make the changelings and ponies just have a big old free love orgy just by using this little toy and they'd have no idea she was mind raping them into it.
But she'd know.
So either she buckles down and finds a way to do this...or takes the easy way out and force herself to live the biggest lie possible, the very antithesis of her morals.
...or y'know, the tree just wanted her to stop hitting it so it gave her an apple, it heard she likes those.
>>25746345
>...or y'know, the tree just wanted her to stop hitting it so it gave her an apple, it heard she likes those.
>everyone thinks there's some big plan here
>Reality is actually
>"JESUS FUCK SHE KICKED ME! Here! Here take it! Just leave me alone!">It turns out the apple is just his wallet, and Chrysalis had a stroke right there.
>>25745727
Is that really an inversion? That's not so much as telling a lie as... like, making you do something
>>25745753
Oh
Thought you meant the old flavour of the Month game purple man
>>25745338
No. No it is not. This is not a situation where slapping around chrysalis does any good meta or otherwise. Things were going well and now they've been burnt all the way back down.
>>25747460
Dude, this thing has gone in so many crazy twists and situations I don't even know what the fuck is going to happen anymore. We somehow started with "Applejack is exposed for keeping up a lie of omission" and ended up with "Aj kicked a mind controlling apple out of the Tree of Harmony." We went so far off the rails we've somehow turned into a boat.
Sure, somebody might be thinking all doom and gloom, but until I actually see us hit that wall I'm just going to hang on for the ride.
>>25747542
>a boat
OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD NOT AGAIN!
MAYDAY! ABORT! END IT!
>>25747574
Ha ha!
Berserk references.
>>25747574
>another arc involving a boat that goes on for 30something threads
>only with applejack character development like Pommel got
YES
YES
ALL OF THE YES
>>25747846
except, unlike Pommel who could be off on his merry way for threads on end because his presence wasn't needed (when he left he was just that prison guard who hung out with 32 but was so unnoticeable Coco accidentally replaced him), AJ is kinda required for any other major Canterlot based activities. If only because of her main character status and not wanting others to solve problems *coughchangelingscough*.
We can stall and just start timeskipping since it should take Fancy a while to sort through the shit
Although if she does goes on a journey who does she take with her?
>>25747995
who do you think?
we wanted a beach episode right?
they're all on government break, let's make them have some fun
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Applejack"
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content does matter, but the show must go on! Now it's time for our main guest...APPLEJACK!
Upbeat music
"You okay, sugarcube? You canceled our sketch."
>Uh yeah, something came up.
"You have some black stuff on ya."
Pinkie wipes some black liquid off her chest and sniffs it.
>Hm...
She licks it off her hoof.
>Huh...that's...not bad.
"Ew...what is it?"
>Um molasses...Don't worry about it. Hey, have you ever had a kitchen accident while cooking?
"Funny you should mention that. This one time, me and mah cousin Peach were using the fryer for the first time. She gets it in her head to try and fry peaches to see what it's like. At some point she accidentally gets her tail in the fryer and magically sets it on fire. In the panic, she threw water to put it out which also went into the fryer which ALSO happened to be on fire. The resulting fireball blew up the kitchen with us in it. Thankfully, Ah got out with minor burns, but cousin Peach managed to burn over 75% of her body. On the bright side, her crush was really into mummies.
>And we're waaay over time, but thanks for joining us everypony and see you all next time!
AJ wakes up.
"...That didn't smell like molasses."
>>25748205
I already have...an idea...It's just Sombra making a lifesize Sandcastle for Two, calm your tits.
>>25748289
>fills it with sand "monsters" for playfighting
>Two goes fullFrisk>Chooses to mercy every single one of them
>>25748205
Well, Canterlot is. The Empire is still up and running so >>25748289 make sure to give an excuse for the royal threeway to leave on a train first (since they can't enter the portal built into Canterlot castle).
>>25748330
Maybe they just let Two go on a vacation?
...I mean, Somby would have to promise not to cause ANOTHER invasion, but they'd probably let him go with.
>>25748361
I don't see that happening since she needs to go by train instead of poofing to physical caretakers (remember Sombra was staying with Twilight's parents when he accidentally an invasion and other than that only oversees her in the castle) but I'm sure we can handwave sending 42 as a guardian.
>>25748433
And Chrysalis because she won't trust AJ with the apple she is holding let alone 2 &42 even with the others.
>>25748594
Er, serious question, would anyone trust AJ with that apple?
Like... I figure most would be like "Uh, maybe we should put that right here... in this bottomless pit."
>>25748874
She's going to do something to prove that you can "trust" the mare of "honesty". Obviously.
>SA
"Spitfire"
~~~~~
>No talks of overthrowing the government and installing a new form of establishment in it's place, right?
"...Hi! Nice to see you too! Great weather we're having, isn't it? It's damn fine out there. Brisk and warm like a sexy stallion, leaves all the tingles! You know?"
>I uh... I actually don't. Not knocking those with stallion-leaning inclinations, only that I do not share them.
"Awww, not planning to have Eighteen fwoosh a special thing for you on your birthday?"
>Wow. No. Just... wow, noooo... wow... no.
"..."
>...but she could turn into another...
"...You okay?"
>NOTHING!
"..."
>...So! Revolution, not happening?
"If it is, I'll run for mayor. Or whatever they call it."
>Emperor?
"You most certainly do not run for those."
>Well, be it, whatever it is.
"Don't worry, I will, and then you can come and live with me."
>Neat!
"I'll only make you wear the maid outfit on occasion."
>...
"Kidding."
>You damn well better be.
"Nahhh, I'd just add you to my harem."
>Oh, thank goodness.
"...'
>Hey, one thing I've learned here is that apparently if you have a harem, you don't actually get laid... or actually have a harem.
"Point."
>...
"It's fine, stop worrying."
>Phew. Thanks, glad you're on top of things.
"Yep. Good thing you brought me on, eh?"
>Heh, yeah.
"And come on, I'd never make you wear that degrading thing."
>Ahhh, I know.
"I'd make you wear a thong."
>..
"..."
>...You think I'd look good in a thong? I didn't think I could pull it off.
"See, this is the kind of shit that makes me glad I quit, stuff like this? One in a lifetime."
>>25748999
>AJ with mind controlling powers
...why is that so scary?
>SA
"Sombra"
>So-
"Don't do anything I did pre-Two."
>Got it.
>>25749580
No scarier than any of the changelings with that ability, to be honest.
Shit, it'd probably be hilarious mind control ponies into doing their work. Even though that would have terrible consequences. Good for NC shorts, though.
>Idris
"Gwen"
[Zep]
{Hilda}
~~~~~
>Yes, stowaways, of course. You handle this one since you're seemingly so good at that.
"..."
>...Ahem.
"I'm very disappointed in you both."
[And I think you're stupid for screwing over our biggest trade partner who donated what I recall to be a, using the legal term here, shitload of aide after Chitania wrecked out city, and then even more, again strictly being of legal tongue, fuckplosive more aiding when fungi zombies ravaged the countryside. Zephyrious? Your thoughts?]
The other gryphon held up but a single digit, and ran a talon across the top of it, clicking "Tsk Tsk" all the way.
[His ways with words remain unmatched.]
>...You ever feel like we should have separated these two when they were younger?
"I miss it when you tried to kill him."
[I do that occasionally, still. Have to keep him on his toes!]
{I was in the bathroom for six hours after she poisoned me last time.}
[And, of course, he chooses to focus on that part, not the part where he missed being poisoned.]
>...She has a point.
{I don't see mother making attempts on your life to teach you lessons.}
"That's because I would only have to try once."
>I sleep holding my sword.
"..."
[...]
{...Do you all ever wonder if normal families are like that?}
"The moron I just left alone with the love sapping bug monster who pretended to be his wife adopted the spawn of all evil incarnate and is now a familial unit consisting of what amounts to a pony minor deity, the harbinger of all that is dark in this world, and a regular pony. We are nowhere near the odd scale on this."
>...Still, honey? You still fear that tiny one?
"SHE WILL DESTROY US ALL!"
[...]
{...}
"DESTROY US ALL!"
>...Okay, when I make the appointment for the therapist again, don't threaten him with beheading this time.
"DESTROY US ALL!"
>>25748214
...So the punchline is Peach is dead, has been dead for a while, and AJ has just been going on trips with a skeleton, right?
>>25750086
Cousin Peach got better when they grafted new skin on her...but that's another story.
>>25750056
I'm the only one who found that pretty cute right?
>>25750712
Nah, I thought so too but that whole group is actually pretty funny
