Can we have a UK litizen thread? This is a topic to post about being a litizen in the UK and the associated demoralisation that comes with it.
Have you noticed that there is no such thing as an attractive girl that reads books? Only fat ones or dyed hair ones who try to attract beta attention.
>>8036522
>alpha/beta dichotomy
Was Hitler alpha or beta?
>attractive girls
>UK
They all look like fucking potatoes
Fucking nation of inbred jugheads with big dumbo ears
>birthplace of the english language
>oi may' das da truf innit da bin lorry comin roun' da corna innit
>>8036534
But that's not true, and what's so embarrassing about your post is that you obviously know it isn't. Play the tape: So there I was returning to my dorm room at the University of Oxford (Jesus College for all those in the know) when I turn a corner and almost collide head-on (literally) with a girl who is about six inches shorter than me, brown hair, petite figure, the kind of girl you'd call "cute" instead of "hot" without meaning it in a mean way or anything. The kind of girl you could marry and take home to meet your mother, the kind whose cuteness emanates into every aspect of her life including (I would later discover) the way her bedroom is decorated and her taste in literature and movies and the way she would always kiss my chest and rub the tip of her nose back and forth the place she'd kissed....but more of that later. So I obviously said sorry and so did she, and the fact we said it at pretty much the same time and then repeated it again in unison made us each smile in a way that was on the verge of becoming a laugh. She had this really natural and unaffected smile that wrinkled her eyes and lifted her cheeks and showed her teeth all the way back past the upper incisors. I was smitten. And I'm not easily smitten. Just ask my friend Jonathan. [Jonathan drops his newspaper for a moment and asks in a droll voice whether I am bragging about my wild romantic life again, which of course I am]. In just over seven months of attending university I had bedded fourteen girls, fourteen more than I had bedded in my life prior to my first entering my dorm room and putting down my open-topped cardboard box on the single bed and looking around the silent room with its bare walls and sparse arrangement of furniture. I had sex with girls whose parents had titles and family crests and who were familiar with extreme wealth in the same way I was only familiar with breathing. I had sex with black girls and hispanic girls and Jewish girls were by no means strange to me on the day I turned that corner on the quad and looked into the eyes of a girl I knew, perhaps only unconsciously at that time, I would call my girlfriend. Now you might want to ask what's so great about a girlfriend? I mean if I'd already had sex with so many girls and made them so besotted with me that even when they saw Amy and I walking around with our palms tightly sealed I would receive text messages and emails asking in no uncertain terms to visit them right then to do what I wanted to their bodies. But with Amy I knew right away that I wanted more than just her body, though her body was in itself to beautiful that any man would be lucky to enjoy it for even one night. No, with her it was beyond physical. And so when we'd each apologized (twice) and smiled in that open and unguarded way I asked where she was rushing to and she replied that it was only to the library, where one of her books was due that afternoon. We stood there for a moment unspeaking but it was clear each of
>>8036587
>Jonathan
You could've just mentioned that you have a character called Jonathan and we would've been able to extrapolate everything else
>>8036587
i wonder whether this and the other oxford text were originally meant sincerely, or rather had always been a parody of romantic idealism.
thoughts anyone?
>>8036600
Definitely not written by anyone legit at Oxford, accommodation is never called dorms/dorm rooms.
>>8036600
Hey kid, what if I told you that I possess just the amount of autism necessary to write both of those Oxford posts?
>>8036639
more than the average /lit/ poster? why so?
>>8036639
please keep posting
