Let's guess shakespeare plays
>be me
>be thane
>meet 3 mad bitches
>tell me ill be king
>kill some guys
>become king
>plan backfires
>get killed
macbeth
Macbeth. That was too easy.
>be me
>kill a lot of people
>it backfires
There, now I've summarized all the plays
>>7465745
except, you know, like all the comedies and a good portion of the histories
try harder edgelord
>be American
>get shot
>be me, baddest badass around
>hanging out in crocodile countries n shit
>bae is cray
>craziest sex NA
>get called back home
>i have to deal with politics n shit
>get married
>get drunk
>no one in this piece of shit continent knows how to party
>fuck it back to bae
>lmao my wife's brother declares war
>he probably bangs his sister
>bae wants to help
>i say no
>"we never do anything together"
>fine bitch
>my bff deserts me
>be sad, but send him his stuff so he doesn't end up a slave
>im too sad to win war
>commit sudoku
>bae keeps talking over my dying speech
>w/e she fine anyway i dont mind
>>7465765
Mark Antony, that you?
>meet 10/10 qt at party
>sneak into her house
>her family get pissed
>be girl
>drink too much end up in foreign country
>w/e lol
>pretend to be guy
>get work from a dude
>dude sends me to romance his crush for him
>fall in love with dude
>crush falls in love with me
>dude still in love with his crush
>wtf is going on
>big bro shows up with some boytoy
>looks like me
>crush turns out to be a shallow slut and only liked me because of my facial features
>she marries my brother
>i tell dude im a grill
>he's like cool wanna make out
>noice
>>7465796
Comedy of errors
>be schizophrenic
>voices in my head tell me to murder my step-dad
>ok
>i got my gf pregnant
>can't deal with that right now
>she's being a bitch about it
>w/e
>i tell my mom she's a slut
>she makes a pass at me
>ok.jpg
>kill my gf's dad
>didn't mean to tho
>also he was being a peeping tom wtf
>w/e im going with some friends to england
>become a pirate on the way
>come back home
>gf ends up killing herself
>bummer
>i kill everyone but my bff
>ehh could've been worse
>>7465754
Shakespeare didn't write a play about Lincoln, dumbass.
>be me, grill
>brother is a manwhore
>gets caught in brothel
>they gonna kill him
>goddamnit
>go talk to judge
>he says he'll let my bro go if i suck him off
>uhmm
>uhh
>no thx
>tell my brother
>he tells my to suck the guy's dick
>i'm like no thx
>he says he's gonna die
>sucks to be you dude
>some guy pretending to be a monk helps out
>we trick the judge into sleeping with some whore
>HE STILL WANTS MY BRO DEAD
>wow
>fine we do another trick and send him someone elses head
>monk turns out to be aristocrat
>he has judge killed
>woo
>he asks me to marry him immediately afterwards
>GODDAMNIT
>>7465800
>none of these are funny/hard/insightful at all
you realize this is just a greentext shakespeare thread right
I guessed it at thane. Horrible example lad.
>be me
>dad has alzheimer's
>sisters are psycholesbians
>dad wants me to kiss his ass
>fuck you dad i do whatever i want
>he disowns me
>whatever
>still marry some rich guy
>move in with guy
>leave my psycho family
>come back to visit
>mfw everyone is dead, dying, maimed or senile
>ask sister what happened
>she tries to kill me
>fails but i pass out
>dad dies holding me
>>7465832
they're not really funny/entertaining. it's like middle school shakespeare summary tier.
>>7465844
what's wrong with that?
>>7465859
i want to be entertained when im on 4chinz :d
>>7465745
R&J?
>>7465789
It's only Tybalt who's pissed, Capulet is fine with it
>be me
>be badass king
>shit i am tired of being this badass
>gonna give my power to one of these these three bitches
>whoever loves me most gets to be the real MVP
>One loves me more than liberty
>other loves me too, so great
>other says nothing.
>nothing.jpg
>nothing.wav
>nothing.mp4
>disown her the fuck out
>kick her boyfriend out of my big ass crib
>oh shit she left
>oh shit these bitches kicked me out
>oh shit i'm in this storm with that fool
>shit disowned bitch is coming back
>sister tries to pop a cap in her ass
>lolfail.asx
>oh shit i'm dying
>die holding that disowned bitch
>be drunk
>have the desire, but not the ability
>be persuaded, but disheartened
>want to have sex, but cannot get an erection
>>7465739
> get played bit a big Orson Welles
> get betrayed by a piece of shit young king
> hear the bells at anti-noon
>>7466385
The Sun Also Rises was not written by Shakespeare
>>7465745
>all the plays
what about the comedies, pleb
>have some sort of mental deficiency
>constantly irritated by schizophrenic thoughts
>look like a hideous monster
>want to rape pretty young girls
>browse /r9k/ daily
>>7468211
richard iii
>>7468213
Not what I was thinking, but does Shakespeare actually portray Richard III as being that bad?
>>7468218
yes.
>>7468223
Hm, well guess again.
>>7468226
winters tale
>be me, Shakespeare
>have the power to create so many damn things
>but all my creations are illusions only, here and gone in an instant
>create so much that I'm separate from real life
>wait, real life is just as temporary and intangible as my plays
>shit.jpg
>give up it all up
>die
>>7468238
the tempest
>brutally kill people
>people get pissed off and start brutally killing my people
>roman emperor is a cucķ btw
>I kill the other people but get killed by a guy who gets killed and also everyone else gets killed by everyone else except some guys who'll have to fix all this shit up
>>7468244
ya you got it
>>7468257
>brutally
oh u
it's julius caesar
>be me
>rehearsing a play with some faggots in a wood
>somebody must have given me krokodil
>and LSD, too
>wake up
>what the fuck happened?
>>7468268
Nope
>>7468288
it cant be coriolanus because it was set before roman empire
>>7468322
macbeth???
