Hi /lit/ I haven't written anything in years but I've

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Anonymous
2016-02-03 23:51:33 Post No. 7657778
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Anonymous 2016-02-03 23:51:33 Post No. 7657778 [Report]

Hi /lit/

I haven't written anything in years but I've been an avid reader most of my life. Anyway I'm going to post a short piece I wrote and just want feedback. Shit on it if you please, whatever. I just want any sort of feedback good or bad.

The Writing prompt was just: Corpses are seeds.

Forests are nature’s graveyards. Mother nature is our Sexton. One can’t help but take a stroll through the woods and wonder of the lives that were, that could have been. Our mothers are trees and our fathers flowers. We’re all the same. Some say when you die you get to choose what your body becomes, may it be a tulip or a great redwood tree. Others are more sceptic and believe whatever happens is random. A complete scientific rebalancing of the chemicals in our bodies with the nature around us. I find nothing more comforting than knowing that after a life of taking a reaping from the land in death I can finally repay my debt.

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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:20:22 Post No.7657863
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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:20:22 Post No.7657863 [Report]

>>7657778
start a religion/10

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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:25:36 Post No.7657886
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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:25:36 Post No.7657886 [Report]

>>7657863
I can't tell if that's a compliment so I shall take it as one, Thank you!

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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:31:06 Post No.7657901
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Anonymous 2016-02-04 00:31:06 Post No.7657901 [Report]

>>7657778
It's very undeveloped and immature: your ideas, though numerous, aren't much to look at; your sentence structures are clunky and repetitive, without variation or anything else to make them interesting. I also recommend using proper grammar: you need a box to break out of, ehh? Advice: read authors with great prose--Gass, Hawkes, Joyce, Pynchon, and Proust are good picks--and analyze their style, think about what they are doing and why they do it, and maybe assimilate, synthesize, take pieces to form a whole; but always, because you are nothing otherwise, write yourself; don't write/attempt to write insincerely because it shows.