how do i know if this anxiety is due to dysphoria or whether its due to fear of transitioning?
>Two problems, one solution
speak to someone and they will help you.
>>6383910
i mean talk with someone that will help you
>>6383890
Well, were you anxious before you started considering to transition? What lead you to considering to transition in the first place? How did you feel?
>>6383926
I don't need a therapist, I need a way of figuring this out myself. Maybe advice from some on her who knows how to figure this out?
>>6383951
What do you think a therapist does? They're basically people who talk to you and help you figure stuff out. They're way better at this than random Anons because they've spent years studying the phenomena of feels.
>>6383937
Well I guess I have always had anxiety, but it suddenly got worse when I realized transition was actually possible for me recently. I had always said to myself, oh I’m not like a stereotypical trutrans so I shouldn’t transition. But this corresponds with the increase in feeling of dyphoria I have been having recently. As my dysphoria has gotten worse I increased my research into transition more, and realized I was an idiot for kidding myself for so long. It’s so fucking obvious I am a tranny now, and I am stupid for thinking I shouldn’t transition for not feeling trutrans. I know that if I don’t transition now, I will only breakdown later, so I have only one choice. Its fucking killing me inside though. I fear being a trany, but also fear staying a man. I fear becoming physically more manly most of all though.
>>6383960
There are no gender therapists near me any way, and i am too poor
>>6383979
You kind of answered your own question, no? You're anxious about both, but you were already anxious about one. I can't tell you what to do and, again, recommend seeing a therapist but from here it seems obvious that even if you weren't anxious about transitioning you'd still be anxious about the whole dysphoria thing. Fearing for the future is natural but not always a sign that you should avoid pushing on anyway.
Deciding without consulting a professional is ill-advised if you have other options.
>>6383983
My gender therapist does other kinds of therapy. She was listed on the website of a local transgender support network, but I don't think she advertises as a "Gender Therapist." And she hasn't charged me in like a year.
>>6383983
That sucks. From what you wrote earlier it sounds like you already know what you have to do but are afraid to do it. If you are suffering as you are and do not see things getting better without transitioning but are afraid of the potential ramifications of transitioning then that's only natural but does not change the facts. If you genuinely think transitioning is the only course open to you then you just have to push through the fear because, all things considered, it is more temporary than the persistent dysphoria you've been experiencing.
I'm extremely reluctant to write the above because it is my experience that people often don't understand themselves very well. If you have any reasonable recourse at all it is best to see a psychologist or at least some local witch doctor from the community. If not I can only wish you luck because, really, what the fuck do I know?
I have recently decided to transition after putting it off for 15 years. Don't fuck it up the way I did. I am about to schedule an appointment with a therapist and I have a lot of fears.
But also I feel a kind of peace and resignation, because I've given up fighting what I am. I'm afraid to see a therapist, but I'm more afraid of going back to that place of self denial. So I'm gonna put one foot in front of the other and get it done, because I finally know what I am now.
>>6383993
I honestly feel like seeing a professional will only cloud my judgement. I have to be responsible for my own decisions, and seeing a theorist allows me to relieve anxiety by shifting the responsibility to them.
>>6384039
Taking responsibility for yourself is the right course of action but I think that it ultimately helps people to discuss their problems with others who have some understanding of human psychology. When you have to explain yourself to other people and answer their difficult questions you often end up understanding yourself better.
>>6384039
A good therapist doesn't tell you what to think. They help you understand your own decision making process.
>>6384074
Ok, then give me a list of those questions and i will figure this out
>>6384083
I'm some guy from the internet, not a professional. I can try but I don't actually know what works and what doesn't. Whatever help I might provide is not of the same caliber. I'll still give it a go because I want to help but if you can you should still see a professional.
How would you describe your experience of dysphoria?
What is your earliest memory in which you felt like you did not belong to the gender aligned with your birth sex or otherwise felt bad about it in any way?
How did those feelings develop over time? e.g. at 4 year intervals?
Were there times when you felt glad or at least okay with being of your birth sex/gender? Are there still periods like that?
Were your childhood interests typical to your birth sex? How did they evolve over time?
Do you suffer from any sort of mental illness?
Have you experienced a severe psychological trauma at some point in your life? Did it affect the dysphoria-related feelings you experienced in any way?
What do you want out of transitioning? How do you picture your life following the process?
Do you crossdress? If so do you experience sexual arousal while crossdressing? Do you experience sexual arousal while imagining yourself as a woman? Is so are the arousing fantasies centered on sex/dating-related situations or simply being feminine?
Are you attracted to men, women, both, neither?
>>6384141
Ok thanks, I figure I might as well post my answers,
http://pastebin.com/sT64XBT1
I think I might be agp in my sexuality, but I don’t think this affects my gender identity, it may even be due to it. Its obvious that i am trans regardless, i am fucked, i best prepare for a life of being hated and laughed at, shit, why does this have to happen! we spend our whole lives forced to keep this shit hidden away and suffer in silence, then we get fucked over for not to transitioning sooner. fuck this is fucked
>>6384302
My ironclad opinion as a pro guy-on-the-internet is that your story very strongly matches the classic and rather unambiguous trans narrative. I don't think you really qualify as an autogynephile by any modern definition accepted by the wider community. Presuming your honesty the kinds of fantasies you described match the kind self-reported by women. Your experience of dysphoria sounds pretty textbook. Everything does, really.
If you are still resistant/unable to go see a psychologist and I have to give you a direction I'd say that you should follow through and transition so long as doing so won't put your life at risk due to living in a non-supportive environment. If that's the case I'd ideally suggest to move somewhere else but I know that in practice that can be difficult for some.
The whole situation is fucked and I'm sorry but you owe yourself a chance to be happy and from the sound of it if you stay as is you won't get one.
>>6384302
>its more convenient that i can pee standing up, because i can pee anywhere, but i really don’t like that i have to use male bathrooms, because they always smell like piss.
This
>>6384471
>Your experience sounds pretty textbook
well this makes me feel less special...
i am fortunate though, my family circumstances and where i live are not that bad
...
I guess i realy don't have a choice, i can't imagine being happy as long as i have this dysphoria, and these feelings are not going to disappear on their own. I just have to be brave and work towards a better future. thanks for your help, i think i have a bit more confidence in my decision now.
>>6383890
How do you know you're only trans because of youre anxiety
>>6386189
the anxiety is just a side effect
