How do I accept being transgender?
How do I get the courage to tell my doctor I am gender dysphonic ?
I want to deal with this now, but I also just want to hide away telling no-one and cry in secret for the rest of my life
>>6321775
iktf ;-; so fucking ashamed of it
repression general is your only hope
>>6324845
The thing is the thought of being more manly and having muscles etc makes me feel sick
You should watch the movie "The Danish Girl". Made me cry a lot, hit too close to home. It'll make you realise it's just something you can't keep hidden away.
Aspirin prevents clotting. Lidocaine numbs the tissue. Exactly blade cuts neatly. Warm bath provides relaxation and a place to fall asleep.
Depending of how suitable a body you were given. It might or not be a good idea to even pursue anything.
In my case, I am well aware that my body, with my behemoth frame, is destroyed beyond any possible fix. I have simply accepted this fact, and by abandoning all hope it seems it;'s easier to just wait it out 'til I expire. Kinda nightmarish to have to live a male, but I should be able to tough it out til the end comes yeah.
>>6326245
seeya later hun
>>6324824
You look semicute tho.
>>6326245
but even if you dont transition hormones will still make you look like a cuter guy. its a win win
>>6321775
This is one of life's many situations where, as comfortable as it is, putting the matter off until tomorrow will make your situation worse than dealing with it today.
>>6321775
fucking stop it
>>6326369
Hey one of those is my thread
Neat
>>6326369
>all those anime posts
>>6326058
>implying lidocaine is strong enough
please I tried using that before laser sessions and it did fuck all, good for mouth ulcers though
>>6326327
kek in like one or two photos with specific angle/lighting, heavy makeup and taken with a specific camera maybe
for a start the length between the middle of my lips and the end of my chin is 2.3 inches when it should be 1-1.6
>>6326528
Well, I did suspect lighting trickery but yeah. Perhaps the moans can still do some work on you plus surgery etc.
>>6326531
that's kind of the problem
I'm disabled so I'm gonna be on bux and in the UK that means it'll take 6 years plus not having ANY recreational costs just to save up £7000
I'm pretty much fucked and stuck as a manfaced hon
>>6326570
If you don't mind sharing and I'll understand if you do.. how are you disabled? Some jobs can be done from the comfort of your home.
>>6321775
idk
seriously considering killing myself because i can't figure it out
>>6326578
I've looked into that, haven't found anything I'd be capable of yet that pays more than just applying for bux
Brain damage, as a result:
Dyspraxia
Hypotonia
Dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, the whole package
Severe asthma
Possibly some mental illness stuff aside from being trans like schizotypal personality disorder but I'm still investigating, not confirmed; plus it's probably inherited rather than caused by the brain damage (which was from a shitty birth btw).
My verbal intelligence is 141 so I fear it masks the extent of my cognitive defects, stuff like processing speed in the low 70s and some stuff like emotional intelligence as low as 56.
Basically I'm just that little bit shitter at everything than other people. Can't even take phone calls, say for a receptionist job, because I can't understand even my own parents on the phone- some forms of dyslexia makes it hard to pick out speech from background noise. What seem like fairly simple learning difficulties actually impact on practically every area of development and skill.
>>6326606
Oh, and I forgot hemiataxia
which is basically a mild form of cerebral palsy but only in the right-hand side of my body
>>6326606
That sucks. I'm sorry. Be well.
>>6326602
Don't.
Unrelated afraid to make a thread about it. Why do i keep getting banned for /polgbt/ threads?
I just try to spread love here and i get shut down by mods
>>6326621
That's easier said than done. People who have nothing to look up to and are always unhappy kill themselves.
>>6326652
Because neonazis are scumbags.
>>6326654
Most people who at some point want to kill themselves later regret it and live on. There is more to life than any one aspect. I won't deny that the pain can be awful for some but for most there is hope.
It takes strength to stay alive. I understand. People are stronger than they think they are. Your ancestors got regularly eaten by tigers. I think you can deal.
>>6326660
I regret not killing myself when i had tge balls to do so.
Now i am just too scared and used to the pain.
>>6326655
But why :c? I am not against LGBT nor am i pro genociding any ethnic group. I just want my country to remain it's white majority and not be bossed around by jews. I am not pro war either.
>>6326667
You got it all mixed up. Suicide is the cowardly option. "I can't deal with life so I'll just give up". Living's brave because it is inevitably painful, even for normal people. It is also kind of nice.
Why is it that you think things cannot be better for you?
>>6326660
>ancestors
Some of us come from ancestors that killed themselves out of fear for the tiger
>>6326682
If the vast majority of the people whose blood you carry in your veins were not survivors you would not be here.
>>6326681
Because things just keep getting worse. I don't fit anywhere i go. I have obscure interests and i am not like other people. I am a sucker and every time i go out people make me buy their drinks.
I get home more depressed than i was before going out. I have no motivation to fix my life and i can't possibly leave my place unless i earn far above average pay.
I don't think i will ever get such a great job that would pay me as much as i need so i might aswell sell my Kidney in Marocco
>>6326621
It's not very easy to find reasons not to.
I want to say that I won't ever allow myself to take hormones because that's a huge thing and somehow people or family would learn and that's not okay.
But i can't really imagine a life in which I'm male.
>>6326709
I don't know your story but none of what you've told me sounds like it cannot be fixed. People got out of worse situations before. Why can't you do it?
If you admit to yourself that it is possible then perhaps you can start working toward achieving it.
>>6326723
What if transitioning leaves you unhappy? Which gender are you attracted to btw?
>>6326688
Na they just died after having children
>>6326723
Part of being an adult is understanding that sometimes you have to pursue your own happiness even if others do not like that. You did not choose to feel the way you do. You owe it to yourself to find a way to stay alive, and if the only way to that goal is becoming a woman then you must follow it.
Your family and those "people" who do not understand.. ultimately, if they do not respect your right to stay alive they are not worth being considerate towards. You are not hurting anyone by pursuing this. Your dream is not "drown people in a lake".
>>6326730
>What if transitioning leaves you unhappy?
I'm unhappy now and don't want to transition but it seems like that is the only option. Maybe it would make me happier.
And i don't really know. Probably men. I've had crushes on guys before but never girls.
>>6326754
I don't even know how my family would react, I know of some who would definitely be against it and others who might not care. I just don't want to appear weak or mentally ill (LOL) or like I have something wrong with me.
>>6326762
Do you browse /pol/? Do you have any friends who know about your issue?
>>6326762
>I'm unhappy now and don't want to transition but it seems like that is the only option. Maybe it would make me happier.
Have you talked with a therapist you like? I support your right to transition but make effort to figure out whether it is truly what you want.
>I don't even know how my family would react, I know of some who would definitely be against it and others who might not care. I just don't want to appear weak or mentally ill (LOL) or like I have something wrong with me.
Being any of these things is better than being dead. Death is the ultimate defeat. Love those who love you, reject those who would rather see you dead than happy.
>>6326768
>Do you browse /pol/?
Fucking hell. Stop trying to convert mentally vulnerable people to your stupid cult.
>>6326773
>Have you talked with a therapist you like? I support your right to transition but make effort to figure out whether it is truly what you want.
Never talked to a therapist and I don't really live near a specialized gender therapist and I would be too scared to go if I did.
Also I can't think of anything else I've ever wanted but to look like a girl and be treated like a girl.
>>6326777
:C I am just making friends. I don't think homosexuality is a mental illness and gender dysphoria is not that bad. I agree that it is a mental illness but i don't want to deny those people happiness.
I just want us to get along. I say the same things on /pol/
>>6326789
>Never talked to a therapist and I don't really live near a specialized gender therapist
Did you check? Did you do the research?
>and I would be too scared to go if I did.
Does this scare you more than the thought of never being happy?
>Also I can't think of anything else I've ever wanted but to look like a girl and be treated like a girl.
I'll go on a bit of a rant here. I don't believe that anyone Ought do anything. There is no *logical* reason to do anything. We only want to live due to a cosmic coincidence, because our ancestors who wanted to live reproduced while those who did not failed to pass on their lack of desire. We seek to be happy because happiness is a path to survival. We seek to be "good" and moral and nice to our fellow humans because this was conductive to survival. This is not to disparage the desire to live, happiness or morality - all are extremely important - but to point out that they are, in the end, arbitrary.
Your desire to be a woman is not any more or less arbitrary. You're not hurting anyone by pursuing it nor are you breaking your moral code. The desire is as valid as your wish to be alive. In some ways it IS your wish to be alive. If you truly believe it will make you happy then you must try to make it a reality. I believe in you.
>>6321775
Tell a good friend, or talk to 'actual' people online and work your way up from there. Set yourself deadlines to talk to people and to reach certain goals.
Trust me that most people won't treat you as bad as you think as long as you keep good friends.
>tfw you tried to help a suicidal person but pushed David Hume/Jean-Paul Sartre and they stopped responding
what have i done
>>>>6326606
Mtf here, people like you make me sick. I work a job to pay for my shit, not wait for a psych to tell me I'm retarded enough to get free money.
Kill yourself,
Not even trolling.
>>6329006
Why are you telling someone to hurt themselves just because they were born with some medical issues? That's downright monstrous.
>>6329006
>being disabled enough to not work means I don't have a right to live
Good thing you aren't in charge of who lives or dies.
>>6328317
mamaaaaaaaaaaaaa you just killed a man
>>6328280
I have decided to tell a gp first, then once i get a referral to a psyc i will tell some family members close to me, then i can at least tell them not to worry because i am dealing with it
I have decided i will make a doctors appointment tomorrow when i get paid. holy shit i am scared though, i just hope the doctor isn't a fucktard about it
>>6332193
Good luck Anon! Props for having the courage to chase happiness.
>>6326461
It's almost as if transgirls enjoy cute things and don't want to watch shows for pre-pubescents.
>>6332233
Thanks anon! i just made my doctors appointment, looks like i have to wait 2 weeks :(
so it looks like i will be seeing the gp 2 days after finishing my exams, but who knows how long it will take to see a psyc after that.... oh god maybe i should look into self medding in the meantime
