>>5396836
The masturbating for temporary relief thing is fairly common. Dysphoria is not-good-feel, and masturbation floods your system with good-feel.

Can't tell you how you should feel, or what you should do, but suggests being very sure that the life you've built yourself is incompatible with transitioning (medically, socially, or both) before you write it off as impossible.

Hormones affect people differently, but you can expect within two months:

Physically, you should see clearer skin, slower body hair growth, breast buds, and some muscle loss.

Mood-wise you can expect to have a less stable mood, less energy, and less sex-drive (or more likely an altered one). I usually hear other trans women saying they feel better despite that.

Anyway, I think you're going to want to let go of your hate-on for women. It's absolutely not their fault you were not born female.

>>5396836
Sounds like a fetish, including that very posts, you are pretending to not be in control and that is a humiliation fetish, that is why you fap this often.

>>5396836
Heya guy. I figured out I had a sissy fetish when I was 21(last year), after much self-loathing and anger that I was still a virgin. I then started to develop envy towards women and all of the attention they get and started to desire to become a hot girl.

I also fantasized men for quite a bit, even after only being attracted to women all of my life but this fantasy is seeming to fade now and I'd rather be a Lesbian.

I know how you feel though, being a tranny would cause me to lose my home, my job, everything.

I think it starts out as a fetish for some, as with any fetish though, it can take on a life of its own if left unchecked. That's how it happened for me.

>>5397211
The problem is that my life is incompatible, I live in an Eastern Europe country so no support social or from the government. My job is pretty much male oriented and some companies don't even want women not alone something as absurd for them as a transgender woman.

So no job, no support, I am kinda fucked.


Also I can blame women for being weak willed whores who get controlled by society instead of doing their thing, just because they want acceptance from others so they are as normie as possible.

Also for some weird reason feel very uncomfortable playing a female character in any game, I pretty much always play male.
>>5399157
Honestly, it sounds like it is either live as a man or live a fetish life.

>>5396836

>being a woman is humiliating


pure ideology

>>5396836
>Sexually I do feel more like a woman since as a gay man I am exclusively bottom and don't like them using my dick in any way.

The fucking delusion kek

>>5397211
But how does the masturbation thing work? Because it removes every single trans interest from me, it is like I am magically free from it and it was all a fetish

>>5397211
My mood feels more normal now

7 months on hormones. I mean in comparison to the last few months with normal male levels, i was crazy depressed and anxious, just sorta lost it, cried every night, zombie tier

Now i just feel kinda normal. I do get sad and i might cry over a really sad video but i feel like i'm more stable now. Seeing a cute girl doesnt ruin my day anymore.

OP i didnt know if this was a fetish either, but when i was depressed i didnt masturbate for weeks and i still felt it, then i did, and i still felt it, and now sometimes if i feel like doing that (i dont all that often) then sometimes i ask myself if i still seriously wish i was female and it's always yes

Kind of always has been.

staying inside a lot isn't very healthy, socializing as a child is important for one's sanity

>>5400019
Nah, I don't have any depression or anxiety issues
I just don't know if it is a fetish or something I should care about seriously,

Maybe a way you accept your gayness is by falling into heteronormativity and seeing yourself as the woman in your gay endeavors. Maybe you actually are trans. It definitely can also just be a fetish, just as liking traps doesn't mean you are gay, liking dressing up like a woman for your sexual partner and being treated like one in bed doesn't mean you have to be trans

>>5400085
I am always pretty confident and didn't care about what others think so I didn't have any problem being gay, it was normal for me since I had no interest in women or sticking my dick in stuff.
I always thought I was gay minus a long time ago when I was younger around 16 where I remember reading some transgender forum all night, going to make a thread about me, choose not to and forget about it until now, only the last two years 20-22 did I start having these "fantasies" seriously, since I did have sex change fantasies before that but it was all sexual. Never been with a woman or interested in one.

>>5400128
The lines are so blurry with a lot of this stuff, there probably are dudes who are just gay and just like getting fucked, and there are probably some guys who are trans who think they are just gay. For you I'd just say explore being trans, maybe more forum posts such as this one and maybe try on some wigs and dresses and lipstick, you might just like it, or if you don't then no harm

>>5400141
I already have long hair so no wigs required but I don't know, wearing a lipstick etc doesn't make you look like a woman.

If you look like a man in a dress that is humiliation, not something to feel good about.

You simply can't just try be a woman if you look like a man.

>>5400202
I'm not talking about doing it out in public, but like in your bathroom, maybe after a nice shave and do the best you can with low commitment to appear more like a woman, you certainly don't have to do it, but plenty of people do

>>5400211
Certainly not going to look as feminine as someone who has taken hormone injections for months and might have some plastic surgery, but to me it sounds like a good way to test the waters if you are curious

>>5396836
Clearly a fetish