Hey kommandos, not sure if this is the right place to ask this kind of question, but fuck it, there has to be some sort of law enforcementfags here
>be 23 y/o KV
>pretty much a degenerate in the sense of life accomplishments thus far
>thoughts of suicide often and occasional rage lash outs
>distract self from life problems by lifting and intranets
>dadfag notices gainz, starts trying to talk me into becoming a cop
>keeps pestering me
>finally give in last month and apply for highway patrol
>physical fitness test and written test seem easy enough, almost positive I'll pass
>that psychological evaluation doh
>some shrink is going to find out my robot power level.jpeg
So, would a law enforcement agency even consider some one like me? I'm curious because if they won't, then I'll just stop the process now by failing the upcoming fitness test and move on with life. I don't want to get my dad's hopes up and then have them crushed some 8 months down the road because his son is some ElliotTier, tfw no gf, loser
>>29911416
Some agency somewhere will consider you if you act normal and pass standards. That being said and I mean no offense by this, but you are not law enforcement material. You want this for the wrong reasons and clearly have psychological tendencies that would inhibit your ability to do the job properly for the duration of a career without either quitting, killing yourself, or acting out in some way and being fired. This is assuming you somehow pass all the hiring requirements and field training. Field training programs are sink or swim specifically designed to weed out people not cut out for the job, though some obviously squeak through. This job is not cut out for most people, and thats nothing to be ashamed of and its not to say later in life you wont be cut out for it....but right now, please consider another career.
>source: cop
>>29911709
Building on that: get some life experience doing something...anything. college or military are viewed in high regards, both are a fucking golden ticket. Do something for several years....if the military or college arent for you, do a random ass job and stick with it for several years. Job hopping looks poorly too and will get you rejected from agencies. Basically get yourself out of this rut you feel like youre in first, then when youre stable and have some life experience give it a shot if youre still interested. People that are in their 30s and married with kids end up being great rookies because of life experience.
You'll fit in with the rest of the sociopath thugs.
>>29911709
>>29911752
I'm not OP but I am thinking of applying to the Memphis police academy. I meet their minimum college credit hours. But my credit is bad and my GPA was low. I do not have a degree. They dont require one. But I have the college hours. Do you think I would make the cut. I am otherwise in good shape, and have a clean record.
>>29911416
For fucks sake, don't be a cop, you loser.
>>29911709
Is that why 50% of cops you see are 50+ lbs overweight? Is that why most cops are power tripping douchebags trying to settle a score with the world by screwing every person they can? I'm not saying every cop is like this but substantial portion of them are. Your job is not some noble fight to save the public, it's about collecting revenue for states and municipalities.
>>29911416
If you think you wouldn't pass the psych-eval you probably can't fake your way through it. Though even if you did fake your way through it why would you want to? You would just be setting yourself up for failure later by getting in shit over how you acted in a job you were not cutout for to begin with.
What you need to ask yourself is realistically (not any of that self-loathing shit) what is your personality like and how do you think you would cope with the bullshit you will face in the job (mediating conflict, people mistreating you, following orders, workload, stress, etc).
If you are not sure just take the psych-eval truthfully and then you will know.
Don't worry about what your father will think of you if you don't pass it, because he already knows what you are like and just wants you to be happy. Given the fact you are concerned you can be sure that you are not some psychopath, since they can't internalize their behavior. But even if you were you don't have to share the results, you can just claim depression as that is very socially acceptable.
>>29911709
>>29911752
>you are not law enforcement material
Thanks for the honest answer, not what I wanted to hear, but you're probably right
>get some life experience
Professionally I've done a few things. I have an AA and an entry level gubment job that covers my manchild lifestyle. I think where I'm lacking is socially. I keep thinking if I get a gf my life will suddenly get better; I strike out on every date I go on though so I don't see foresee changes happening anytime soon
>>29912096
>Don't worry about what your father will think of you if you don't pass
That's easier than done. He's a type A personality, go-getter, that has a tough time taking "no" for an answer. The disappoint levels will be through the roof if he finds out his kid isn't cut out to be a cop. Fug
>>29912244
Hey man I'm not here to bust your balls. I want to give you some life experience from a 30 year old who has been engaged, went to college, wanted to be an air force hero. But wound up nothing like that.
>They're probably right about you not being law enforcement material. BUT, are you a loyal man? I got a job, had no interest in the job, but because my boss trusted me, and I cared about the quality of work I did, I became the best and he actually started having me travel and train all his new hires (hotel industry). You might be good at law enforcement, if you care about the quality of work you do and feel a loyalty to your community (personal demons aside). I had no interest in hotels, but when I needed a part time job they were the first to give me an interview and hire me. I became a fucking hotel phenom. I became a god damn expert at everything Hilton related and it turned into a good career.
>You say you think if you had a GF everything would fall into place? Fucking throw that idea right out the window right fucking now. Fucking toss it. No shit. Get that fucking idea out of your head. You need to focus on you. You need to become the best version of whatever you can be, and THEN you will find a girlfriend. Dont forget. This isnt highschool. You're not going to find a woman who just loves you for who you are no matter what happens. You are going to have to work your entire life to be the kind of man a woman wants to be around. Trust me I've been engaged to a girlfriend of 6 years. I got fat, she asked me to get in shape, I didnt, she broke up with me. Theres no automatic I love you no matter bullshit outside of highschool you are going to have to actively keep yourself in shape and bring in money for a woman to stay with you. Your work doesnt end. Thats life. A girlfriend wont fix you, youll just lose them and lose them until you fix yourself. You need to keep working, and keep achieving. You need to respect you before a woman will respect you.
>>29912024
You dropped your fedora.
>>29912244
>The disappoint levels will be through the roof if he finds out his kid isn't cut out to be a cop.
Would failing the fitness test really be any better? What would stop him from getting on your case about making gains and trying again?
>>29912244
hey man, you better stick around, bec. I have real fucking advice coming your way. I'm the poster that just posted a fucking book. But I have some more to add.
>You say you get dates but always strike out. Thats bec. You're not cool. Trust me man I been there. I been desperate, found a girl I really liked, knew she was seeing other guys, and I wanted to tie that shit down immediately. Well, on the first date, thats awkward as fuck and will turn her off in a heart beat.
>You're not being cool man. You gotta be cool. Take a girl out. And pretend like shes your guy friend. Just be cool. Dont try hard, dont sweat, dont be a god damn prince charming, thats the scent of a desperate man. Treat the girl like shes an old fucking guy friend you havent seen in a while. You say you strike out on dates. You're probably treating every date as the beginning of a relationship. Well thats wrong. Dont get jealous when she talks about her guy friends, dont try to seal the deal right away. Just fucking buy her dinner like you would an old friend, be cool, and she will be texting you the next day. Then you just continue inch by inch till you get her back to your place and fuck her. Then you got her on the line, then you can start thinking about girlfriend shit. Fact is, women arent as romantic as men. You aint gonna woo a bitch with dinner and flowers and shit. Get her to keep seeing you, manuever her into bed, then you got something. But you gotta be cool man.
>>29912407
All that GF shit is unfortunately pretty fucking true, pussy commands a very high price in our society.
Alternatively, just become a homo. Never heard a gay guy complain about not being able to get instantly laid.
>>29911416
anon, if you do manage to become a cop, please be good and don't let your personal problems impact your job. There are already a fuckton of shitty cops, and the last thing we need is another one wielding a badge and a gun, with no reason to live.
As a cop, you are gonna deal with a lots of bullshit. People are gonna hate your guts, and you will deal with the lowest slime of humanity. The community is trusting you to impartially protect the weak and defenseless, so if you don't think you can do that, don't even apply.
Just join the military instead. It's ideal for people like you.
Do you like dogs OP?
If the answer is yes, the job isn't for you.
>>29912716
I felt threatened lol
Op, not only take the greentext advice, but also listen to this. You said you successfully went to college, got an AA, and have an active, current government job.
Know what this says to me? You aren't some r9k kv, you aren't some worthless shit. You are scared. You are normal, scared of being alone, and scared of pushing yourself any further, which is how you would stop being alone. You are selling yourself short.
Have some fucking balls, man! Get a little fire in your belly! You're here on /k/, come on, go fucking nuts. Do you have moral fiber? Do you care about doing good, do you take pride in your work and keep good work ethic? Well GO FUCKING BE A COP.
Of all things they need, of everything they see, it is deterimnation, confidence. That is what you need to succeed in life, so find it. You might not have it right now, but fake it until it is there, really. I used to be quite like you and I did it. Go do it, go be a cop, and better yourself.
I mean, hell, think of the other ones. We always talk about bootlicker shit heel narcissists and fat pigs and shitty revenue makers with delusions of grandeur. If they can make it, you can too. And do you want to leave the policing, leave your community and it's safety to THEM? FUCK NO! So get a little fire in you, better yourself, do some good. You're a human being, God dammit! Your life has value! Start acting like it!
>>29912407
Damn, that story brah. People like you give me hope; I've been applying for blue collar jobs with high potential for upward mobility within my department. I'm really hoping I land one of them far enough away from home to where I can move out and start my life with a clean slate. The only reason I'm even considering law enforcement is to avoid enduring more years of life sucking uni and to keep my dad happy. But fuck it, I'm taking whatever opportunity that comes my way next and rolling with it
>>29912587
Never considered this. His friend's kid failed the fitness test a couple years ago and he still brings it up occasionally. Maybe I'll fail the written portion instead, he won't be able to talk as much shit this way
>>29912601
>You're not being cool man
I realize this, I spill spaghetti on dates. I'm working on it, but it's difficult. I didn't have much female friends growing up so grills are strange to me. My beta ass subconsciously places them on another level. I know this is stupid because they are only human; but fuck, old habits die hard
Specifically for state trooper Op should be fine. State troopers don't do community police , they stick to the freeways and either give out traffic tickets or run into extremely dangerous criminals in transit somewhere.
It's not the same as a city police officer that has to read social clues before going ham. Either your shit is road legal or not.
Disclaimer: I am not in law enforcement
Have fun with the MMPI - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnesota_Multiphasic_Personality_Inventory
I took one a gozillion years ago along with an interview with the physiologist. Fairly sure things have not changed that much.
Don't overthink the questions, try to lie or answer how you think is the "appropriate answer" you WILL fuck yourself.
Remember everyone is nutz in one way or another.
Do you like sheep? Press 1 for yes, press 2 for no
>>29912869
Dont know if you're still around OP, but hope you the best. I know grills are strange, and I grew up with 3 sisters. Heres a quote I never get tired of saying. From Al Bundy. "Bud, dont try to understand women, women understand women and they hate each other" Its true. And as for girls you gotta focus on yourself not them. I'm the greentext guy from above. When my 6 year girlfriend broke up with me, I started to focus on myself, I worked out, read everything about everything I could find (culture, art, history, religion), got new hobbies, and basically just tried to become perfect, for myself. I started treating people nicely and being patient with idiots, smiling and saying hi to everyone I met. And all of a sudden I had girls hitting on me, and I still wasnt even completely happy with myself, but I was focusing on myself, trying to be a good man, and girls noticed that, I wasnt focusing on them at the time, and that drew them in. They dont want a guy who wants them, they want a guy who is interesting, takes care of himself, and actively tries to better himself. Do that, dont focus on having a girlfriend, focus on yourself, in 6 months you will have 100% more success with women. As for being a cop, good luck, thats what I want to be. I'm applying to the Memphis police academy soon, and with my bad credit and low GPA, I'm afraid of not being selected. But I'm gonna try god damn it.
>>29915551
thanks for the advice man, your story is an inspiration for me to keep moving forward. I'm just going to focus on myself and career for now until everything falls into place; if a Stacey wants to be a part of it, then cool. If not, whatever, I got shit to do
>applying to the Memphis police academy soon
best of luck brah. I may not be fit to be an officer at this point in my life, but you sure as hell sound like you're ready
>>29912869
>Maybe I'll fail the written portion instead
Anon, you would have to be a complete fucktard to fail that. It appears you can form a sentence and understand "their" and "they're" so you should be good.
>>29915551
>I'm applying to the Memphis police academy soon
Just took the exam for Chicago and am testing with another big city soon. Memphis is a busy city, good luck.
>bad credit
You can work on building back up your credit. Start small.
>low GPA
Not sure how things are in Memphis, but Chicago all they care is you have a 2yr or .mil could give zero fucks what you studied. The recruiter for the other city I'm applying to flat out told me as long as you have a 2yr(AA degree) they don't care if you have a 2.0 or 4.0
>>29911937
Honestly not sure but if you finish your degree youd be good to go. Most dont care about credit hours, just a degree. All or nothing.
>>29912024
Careful not to cut yourself on that edge. All kidding aside, generalizing by saying "most" is not accurate. You just described a minority.
>>29912244
It sounds like your issue is self-esteem related more than anything. Low self esteem can result in a lack of social interaction, and law enforcement is a customer service profession based on social interaction. Again id suggest maybe joining the military to help break you out of your shell.
>>29916232
>>29916349
Thanks guys, I'm guy from above. OP, you could be a great officer, you just need to believe in yourself. Everyone going into a new industry (even law enforcement) is worried about how they will perform. All you gotta have is a sense of loyalty to your community, some respect for yourself, and a bit of "I'll god damn make it through this if it gives me a heart attack" kinda balls. You sound young OP, thats ok, youll figure shit out. I'm only 30. I'm actively trying to become a police officer. You're giving yourself too much shit. Dont hate on yourself. Start working out, start reading up on different cultures and history and art etc. Get yourself a man hobby like fishing/shooting/wood working. Ive been into all of those. I also love to read and learn. I also love to work out and test my limits. You gotta realize OP, you are you, you are not one half of a coin, or relationship. You are a man, you are fucking you all day every day bro. You gotta make yourself awesome, and work on it every day. Then and only then will you be happy with yourself and have bitches drooling over you. And it will happen,. But focus on YOU OP. You gotta be you. Make a YOU. Theres a YOU inside you. You havent found it. But you are OP the king of OPs You are YOU and you'l be fine, but You gotta focus on being an awesome YOU. That means mental clarity (meditation every day) Exercise (stress your body) and general interesting guy shit. Be a man OP. Dont focus on bitches. Focus on you. And bitches will be lining up.
>>29916349
Thanks man, Memphis wanna be officer here. Good luck in Chicago. I thought Memphis was violent (have literally no bullshit had drivebys happen on my street) Chicago seems rough even to me. I hope I get selected though. Its actually a pretty good job in my opinion, never the same day twice, good retirement, decent salary for where I live. I might get some hate, I might get shot at (my uncle took a round in his leg) but hey, I'd take that over a cubicle (I work in the hotel industry right now) Thanks though, and good luck in Chicago. I been to Chicago. Shit can be a rough city.
>>29919100
>Good luck in Chicago.
Thanks, dubs Memphis anon. If I get on the job i'll need it haha.
>never the same day twice
>I'd take that over a cubicle
This so much. Yeah my family wants me to work for them in some capacity but i'd much rather do my own thing.
>>29912986
You are partially correct, but you still need the skill set of normal policing since you can and will be sent to normal calls when others aren't available or too far. I'm going to apply for my state's highway patrol after college and it definitely does seem more like an ex-mil fraternity rather than a normal agency.
>>29919181
Memphis anon here, thanks Chicago bro. Memphis is like a little Chicago. Violent as hell. If you're gonna be a Chicago cop, god speed man. I hope to become a Memphis beat officer, then maybe detective (or chopper pilot, I am a fixed wing pilot its what I went to college for) But after getting a few credentials, I wanna transfer to Tampa or Miami or something on the east coast. Its probably a pipe dream, but its my dream goddamn it.
>>29919181
I hear you man, my family hates the idea of me becoming a cop. (my dad died, so now its just my pussy sisters and mom telling me Ill be a grunt, get shot, no future, kinda thing) Its not true, at all, its just all my family I got left are hysterical women. So they tell me its a shit job and Ill l get killed and they will disown me. Fuck it, I'm gonna be the best god damn cop in Memphis history. And I dont care about the badge or the gun. I actually want to fucking mediate domestic arguments. I want to help people, and I want to get to know the city I love. I want to know my city, I want to be the good guy who fixes problems without cuffs or a gun. I really do love my city. I just hope I get accepted for the academy.
>>29919418
>Miami
I live in FLA so I applied to Miami-Dade PD when they were hiring. Tried to get an internship but not luck.
>>29919550
Guess better to get used to hearing the negativity and shit talking now.
> I just hope I get accepted for the academy.
My advice anon, is cast your net wide. Apply to several other cities because for whatever reason your background investigator flags you it'll be a pain.
>>29912407
Holy shit dude. Solid piece of advice on /k/ if ive seen one
>>29911709
hello cop sir, I was planning on joining the force once im out of college. I'm getting a bachelor in business, not sure which division of it yet, i just got done with my first year and im deciding on the details. I digress
Mainly, i wanted to know how long it would take me to get a deputy sheriff position with a bachelor in business, ive heard some good about having a flexible degree like that.
Also, I eventually want to get into a government LEO position, like the DEA, or secret service. My grades are good, i have a 3.5 right now, and i always keep it at that, as a bare minimum. I spoke with a DEA agent, and he said he got a bachelor in business, and as long as you have over a 3.0, you apparently have a chance at getting into a government job.
what do you make of this friend? I'm pretty naive in life currently, but I believe im cut out for LE. Ive also been shooting since i was 9. (20 now) and own several guns
>>29921861
Business is good cause it gives you something to fall back on if it doesnt work out. As for how long it takes, completely depends on a bazillion factors. Every agency and every state does things differently.
Best of luck, keep your grades up and go to job fairs. Law enforcement agencies are having a rough time recruiting nationwide so a lot of agencies both local, state, and federal set up booths at job fairs. Always be polite, professional, write legibly, and wear at least business casual clothing to anything where you'll come in contact with a possible recruiter and be clean cut. So any job fair, any ride along, any time you pick up or drop off an application, slacks, button down, nice shoes and nice belt, and a tie if you got one. Suit jacket or sports coat for formal interviews.
