Things your gun would say when you cleaned it.
>>30270415
we already had this thread I want a new topic
>>30270415
>"You clean me like your sex life!"
nothing
tfw eu ;_;
>>30270415
>"OH YEAHHHH SUCK MY JAGGONNNN"
>>30270415
>"Why do I smell like bananas?
>>30270415
Wet deep throat fuck sounds as I push brush through the barrel.
"Gluck, gluck, pop, mmm, slurp"
>>30270415
Clean me like one of your french guns.
>>30270512
How do you clean a gun after you drop it in the mud and surrender?
>>30270428
!!!
Things you can say about your guns, but not your girlfriend.
!!!
>"Anon, I can run well enough if I'm a bit dirty, stop wasting money on ballistol and buy more ammo."
>>30270552
I have one
>>30270552
"I'm glad I have you in my life."
>>30270558
>>30270561
/t..thread?
>>30270552
i don't have one ;_;
>>30270558
Want to trade lives?
>>30270512
Cleaning a FAMAS is something, ever heard of the "24h FAMAS"?
>>30270552
"I can atleast fill your fun-hole"
"Ooh, I haven't been touched like this in ages"
>>30270450
Bananashark...
>>30270994
more like
>w..wait NOOOOOMMPMMMPPMHHHMMMM
>>30270415
>Mmmphnmmphmmmphhh *gluck gluck gluck*
>>30270415
>GOD FUCK OW WHY ARE YOU DRAGGING A SCREWDRIVER INSIDE MY RECEIVER
>>30270415
>Brushy Brushy I feel so clean!
>>30270415
Fucking took you long enough.
>>30270552
"That's enough oil."
>>30270415
It would just talk and talk about all of the people its killed. Like an old cowboy who tried to take my great great great grandpa's wife, or the time it was used to kill a krout who was whippin' his guns mouth all over Germany, or the time it was used to hunt. My gun has many stories.
Anyone care to hear them? I've got a 3 hour car trip ahead of me, and I ain't driven.
>>30270552
i can trade this 45 for a few 22s
its great to have this 17 locked in my closet
if anyone breaks in its up to you to stop them
just stay in the closet till i need you
i hope no one sees you when we're in public together (CCing)
>>30273123
I'll just tell them anyway.
Read this in an old ladies voice.
>ohh my, what soft lovely hands you have
>you know, I used to have a cowboy with soft, velvety hands just like yours
>he was a rough man, but he had soft hands and a soft heart
>he looked a bit like you actually, sonny
>in fact he was your great great great grandfather
>he was a rough and tumbly like man
>he had a whore of a wife unfortunately
>I was much better for him anyway
>anyway, she was always sneaking around with the miners of the town
>well one day your great great great grandfather caught one with his wife
>boy was he mad
>the guy ran out, but your great great great grandfather marched right over to me, picked me up, and walked outside
>I saw the mans back through my barrel
>I knew that he wouldn't miss, but I felt bad for him
>he was shaking like an old woman on an outhouse potty
>as his tears dripped down my stock, he puled my trigger, and I took that mans life
>that was the first time I ever took a mans life
>eventually I was passed on to his son, your great great grandfather
>he used me to hunt
>I killed many deer with him
>I liked him alot
>but the most fun I had was being sneaked aboard a transport ship with his son, your great grandfather, to head over to Germany
>be careful, son, that's a delicate part there
>>30270415
"Oh anon, I love the way you scrub my piston so hard...you treat me like the dirty bitch I am! I don't even need to be cleaned but you clean me so hard anyway..." *blushes*
>>30273239
>anyway, your great grandfather...where was I?
>oh yes, he sneaked me on a ship and I remember he was so sea sick he was barely able to stand
>it took us almost 3 weeks to get to england
>there I met some old boys who had very large bolts
>some of them wanted to put there bolts in me, but I stayed true to your great grandfather
>he was always so good to me
>we eventually got boarded onto another ship, and took about a week to get to Germany
>D day was already 2 days past, and we were landing in Normandy to provide support for a push into German held territory
>it was quite a show
>British were laying all over, most likely dead, but I couldn't tell much
>all I could see was the sky, or those damned Krouts pointing their guns at us
>I shot a few
>one time we were in this field, and I remember we were watching some Germans walk around a fire, and they were having a merry old time
>I wanted to join them infact
>but I knew that's not why we were there
>I almost felt sorry for them
>they looked so kind
>but I knew they'd kill your great grandfather if I didn't serve him well
>we killed 5 of them that day, me at least
>Ernst, he was your great grandfathers issued M1 Garand
>he was such a kidder
>he would constantly throw up his clip to early, and routinely took 2-3 Kroits with one clip
>he even jammed on purpose sometimes, just because he could
>boy, did him and I have a good 'ol time
>anyways, he had a little competition going on
>if I remember right, we had to get the most kills before the Germans surrendered
>I ended winning, because Arthur, your great grandfather, loved acting like a cowboy
>he even had his grandpa's hat he wore
>he was always getting in trouble for sing me though. And wearing that hat.
>boy did he look so handsome in his grandfathers hat
>if only I was a real woman. I would've snatched him up, if ya know what I mean, boyo
>hehe, am I embarrassing you yet?
>well good
>anyway, back to the stir
>it was such a good time
>>30270415
TAKE THAT OUT OF MY ASS
>>30270552
I want to stick you up my ass.
Now leave me alone for a year.
harder
>>30270994
Someone saved one of my pictures.
Truly I am famous on the internet now.
also
>>30270552
It's real
>>30270432
>>"You clean me like your sex life!"
real clever, ace
>>30273269
>Piston
L-lewd
