Where is that guy who started sleeping with a Markov when he caught Greys on his webcam after setting it to motion detect?
Also general alien home defense thread
I'd guess he's halfway back to Alpha Centauri by now.
>poorfags actually delude themselves into "preparing" for shit like this
probably out at the local job center like the welfare recipient/makarov owner is.
>>30144279
Just pierce the base of the neck famalam
>>30144315
i still don't understand why he survived, wasn't getting stabbed in that place the end?
>>30144334
It should have been. What I don't get is how were they able to retcon seasons 1-10 when him and literally a bunch of other aliens existed
>>30144279
ayy lmao hes gone man
>>30144291
t. grey
>Grays
>about 4-feet tall, <100lbs
>basically the same body build as a starving African child
This brings a whole new element to caliber arguments. Basically, a .45 would hit a Gray the same way a .50BMG would hit a man.
>yfw your .380 could actually kill something
>>30144399
guns wont work baka, apparently they can disable mechanical systems like guns and their presence usually interferes with electronics
>>30144430
>they can disable mechanical systems like guns
how the fuck can anyone disable springs?
>>30144430
>aliens can disable mechanical parts
if it's a size issue, just get yourself an overbuilt weapon, of sorts.
You know you want a revolver with a car suspension for a hammer spring.
>>30144504
Sciencemagic.
>>30144504
>the only component of a gun is a spring
>>30144506
this may work, i suspect their telekenisis can only do lightduty things like stopping the trigger from working or something
now the hammer of a revolver..
>>30144279
>Implying Greys can't laser your ass from the orbit with space-to-Earth weapons systems. No reason for aliens to go kicking in doors.
>>30144548
unless they want you
>>30144519
Gray's aren't the telekinetic ones faggot. Those are the greens which are much taller and built differently. Gray's are more hostile and probe happy though.
>tfw you won't be "probed" by little gray aliens because they don't find you hot.
Why even live?
>>30144579
>Gray's aren't the telekinetic ones faggot. Those are the greens
your retarded, greens arn't real, they are just a product of paranoia and mass hysteria, greys account for the vast majority of sightings/encounters
>>30144279
>caught Greys on his webcam
Well now I need the video.
>>30144614
No shit greens get sighted less. They are telekinetic and can brainwash. Gray's just kindof hope their drugs work long enough to probe you. Plus, greens don't seem to have as bad a reputation for probing.
>>30144627
*screen cap
>>30144334
Obvi not deep enough
>>30144636
Did someone say greens?
>>30144430
bullshit, the laws of physics won't suddenly cease to apply in the presence of ays
>>30144685
>arguing against the abilities of an interstellar faring species
>>30144685
>implying the understanding of laws of physics have been completely mastered by humans
>>30144683
whats the story of this pic again?
>>30144279
I lived in Rural oklahoma when I was growinf up and I remember seeing triangles fly over the ranch we lived on at night, never ventured out at night without my dad SKS and the firewood was like 1300 feet from our house...Whats odd is that about 5 mins after the triangles would fly over the area f-16's would fly over...its an odd thing.
>>30144638
video , screen cap , whatever.
Point is proof or it didn't happen.
>>30144724
>Former Marine goes to college
>Marine has trouble (duh)
>Marine takes up meditation
>During one of his sessions he sees a floating light
>Becomes a natural, college is nowtoo easy for him
>out of the blue, drops out
This is where shit gets real
>starts hearing alien chatter in the back of his mind
>he's able to see aliens hiding as people
>they see him
>they mind fuck him even more
>Marine tries to go into hiding
>one day, receives a text message from a priest or pastor nearby
>he believes its an alien
>pastor won't leave him alone
>Marine gives in and arranges to meet the pastor at the church
>Marine arrives
>Sees pastor
>takes out righteous .45
>mag dumps into pastor
>pastor is hit at least 3 times in the back of the head
>marine runs off to deliver his message of the aliens to every news agency possible
>including Obama
>pastor is in stable condition
>>30144815
does anyone have screen sshots of this?
>>30144840
With Google fu I'm sure you can find the dozens of articles about it
>>30144840
Google image search seems to work
>>30144939
>>30144926
Is this the Marine in Idaho?
>>30144504
>be ayy
>attempt follow-up exam on human
>arrive at target's residence
>subject feels agitated
>he brandishes a projectile weapon
>psionically paralyze his hand
>subject imagines a barrier
>regains motor control
>quickly apply dampening field
>firing pin inertia contained
>he looks surprised
>mind shield stutters
>resume paralysis
>transport to ship
>subject attempts to mentally resist again
>begin human male placating procedure
>insert probe into subject
>subject resists, claims experience with larger probes
>mental image unclear
>command insists on further study
>I went to Zeta Reticuli Technical Institute for this?
>>30144279
>Markov
kys
>>30144279
Fake shit bro.
>>30144953
Ur weird
>>30144430
Not only that, but they can disable your nervous system meaning all you can do is simply sit and watch.
>>30144279
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeurFKky-zw
>>30144279
anyone have the pics he posted or a screencap of the thread?
>>30145089
That guy seems perfectly sane, and reliable. I don't see a reason to doubt any of his story.
>>30145252
a person being completely find after 3 .45s to the head is what makes possible for me
>>30144279
Here's the pic from his laptop
>>30144953
Kek
>>30145436
thats fucking spooky
>>30145411
A lot of people have been shot in the head and survived, look at Giffords.
>Inb4 she's an alium too
>>30145436
>I want to believe.
>>30145436
Wee woo wee woo
Da nanana
Woo wee woo wee woo
>>30145845
>>30144504
sonic-induced metallic embrittlement.
>chemical propelled kinetic weapons
>against a race that has obtained interstellar travel
>>30144279
Grays aren't even aliens. They are just human time travelers from the distant future. Historians, maybe.
>>30144504
any technology when sufficiently Advanced is indistinguishable from Magic
>>30144399
But they are not flesh. At least not like us. They are not carbon based, they are silicon based. How would that affect ballistics.
>>30144504
Natural frequencies and shit
>>30144279
probably dead because he missed a 90% hit chance on a sectoid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSDNvNesMxE
I hope this guy comes back, I am interested
>>30147175
A good reason to use .308
>>30147175
>silicon based
This meme needs to die. Silicon would be a terrible choice. Everybody knows greys are made of tungsten oxides.
>>30147168
Then why do they keep poking my but and cownapping my cattle?
>>30147258
>ayy lmaos made of rust
In that case an electric shock should kill em right?
>>30147004
Sgairy :DDD
>>30145497
3 .45s to the head of any human should be the equivalent to just smoking an M80 cigar. Gifford had a .223. She's completely fucked up though.
>>30147579
Andelay neenyos!!
>>30144279
Man this shit is creepy. Its one of those things you can totally blow off and consider the person who told you crazy, but then again its totally plausible for beings like that to exist.
What does /k/ use do defend themselves from the greys or reptilians?
>Primary
>Secondary
>Melee
>Other?
>>30147714
My problem with it is that there's literally nothing you can do about it.
I don't doubt there's some other intelligent lifeform out there somewhere, but what can you actually do about it?
Movies, sightings, people documenting their experiences, every time people talk about aliens they give the feeling of absolute despair as you're at their mercy and all you can do is sit there. Being in that position is hell.
>>30144281
You mean Zeta Reticuli.
>>30147766
>nothing you can do about it.
I'm sorry, is this board now /x/? I thought this was /k/. The magical place full of retard strength operators and people with more firepower than common sense. Don't just bitch out anon. Remove ayy lmaos until they remove you.
>people STILL think aliens are from another planet
>2016
top kek its like deciding who to vote for when you only get your info from TV news entertainment....oh wait
>amerifats
never mind
>>30144953
>Zeti Reticuli institute
>Not Alpha Zi
Jesus no wonder you got the shit jobs.
Btw kekd.
>aliens attempt to abduct me
>I have been preparing for this moment
>grab cold steel dragon katana
>$300 bottle destroyer, let's do this
>cut through my interplanetary attacker with ease
>put on my best fedora I keep by the bed for emergencies
>ayy lmao seems surprised as it dies
Heh, nothing personnel, kid
>>30147258
>not understanding organic compounds and other base elements like them
>>30144279
not gonna lie, that pic is a wee bit unsettling. Why can't ayys be cute like snek?
You poor bitches are gonna get probed!
My ass is safe. I work nights!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah!
>>30150507
>implying we won't just stop by during the day
I hope you don't live somewhere rural :^)
>>30150507
They can also come durring the day, we have cloaking techs. There really is nothing you can do to stop the Ayys.
>>30147146
>not rocking Kinetic Artillery endgame
>>30150546
Those big heads look awfully punchable. It would be a shame if something happened to them.
>>30150645
>implying you can even get close to an ayy.
Dude, they would just freeze you with our telekinesis.
>>30150421
Agreed, I'd even prefer sergals to ayys.
And sergals are just dumb.
>>30147714
Check this out.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bGABfJT-U1I
The beings she describes are EXACTLY (every detail) the same as what Travis Walton described as the human like beings he saw when he was abducted. He passed a polygraph 3 times, as did the others who witnessed the craft.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Travis_Walton_UFO_incident
>>30150855
>polygraph
>determining the truth
It only proves that he believes it. I've had some pretty realistic dreams before.
>>30144279
heres my cap.
>people finding grayyyy lmao to be scary.
Take them out of shifty light conditions and put them in a regular situation and they cute fuckers. Not like they xenomorphs or some shit.
>>30150941
I mean I'd sooner want to pet and cuddle a sectoid than be spookied by em.
>>30150855
>m-m-m-muh common details
>m-m-m-muh polygraph
pound sand tinfoiler
>>30150855
>Travis Walton
No, you're confusing him with George Adamski.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Adamski
>>30150855
why didnt her boys also testify...
>>30151052
That woman's sighting was a different event from Travis Walton's.
>>30144815
>>takes out righteous .45
>pastor is hit at least 3 times in the back of the head
>>pastor is in stable condition
Explain further.
>>30151124
in the video she said her sons were with her and saw what she saw. Why would they not have all the witnesses speak?? makes it more believable...
>>30144279
>Also general alien home defense thread
Pic related is my defense, it's like the Colt of cocks because it's one size fits all.
Even my micropenis will be ready.
>>30151183
No, she didn't take one either. Travis Walton and his co-workers took them because the police first thought they murdered him until he came back 5 days later.
I just posted that video because both cases describe the same beings exactly.
>>30144279
He should have uploaded some picture or some shit for us.
>>30151217
yeah im just more interesting the video story, is there more? I want to see her sons interviewed.
>>30144291
it's a thousand times more likely than a zombie apocalypse
the problem is if they can get here they pretty assuredly have better weaponry than us
at the very least it'll be on par; they could ram a ship into our planet at ludicrous speed and level a city
>>30150303
>not understanding how unlike carbon silicon is
it's the only thing that can approach carbon (besides maybe hydrogen) in terms of how many compounds it can form-- but it only approaches it, it does not match up at all
>>30144279
If we take in consideration the fermi paradox, we humans will cease to exist before we meet any kind of inteligent species outside the solar system which is quite a sad outcome.
People always talk about ayy lmaos stuffing things in their assholes but seriously, we will most likely never meet anything.
But let's also consider the exception to the rule, if they somehow have FTL travel, that means your average Joe using your average Joe physics weapon is not really going to fuck them.
>>30151246
She's done a few interviews. Her name is Jessie Roestenberg. As far as I can see her children have not gone "on record."
>>30151125
Clearly the pastor was an alien with a hardened exoskeleton around its skull
>>30150421
>>30150542
OVERCOME
>>30144815
Kyle Andrew Odom
Here's his manifesto
http://media.spokesman.com/documents/2016/03/ODOMDOCS.pdf
>>30151381
Or .45 sucks dick
>>30151439
Bro, do you even stopping power?
What if the aliums are big?
we must worship them as our gods or they will sacrifice the third born children of the corn. convert or be condemned to a life of sin and despair
>>30147362
This explains Finnish facial features and social skills so much.
>>30147175
Everything dies when you shoot it in the head with an AK
>>30151461
Sauce?
>>30152090
Muv-Luv.
It's fucking awful, don't watch it.
If you want cute girls saving the human race from horrid space monsters just watch Gunbuster and/or Diebuster.
>>30147223
when dealing with enemies with unknown biology use a rifle 5.56 minimum.
Also, holy shit I haven't heard the macarena in fucking ages. I had to go and look up the original song, since when did it have English lyrics?
>>30150912
nope, just nope
ayy lmao
>>30144504
Magnets
>>30147579
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XNLHS8o73Q
>>30150645
I remember reading a story where ayys (who were hyperevolved humans from the future) has enslaved present-day earth to act as a refugee center after some far future apocalypse (caused by their timetravel, causality and shit). The MC just decided to wreck the timeline by bashing them with a baseball bat.
>>30144736
YOU. I HOPE YOU ARE STILL HERE. What formation did they fly in and how many?
>>30144279
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRJ7eCiWY7M
https://www.scifigeeks.com/product-category/xcom/
Post your XCOM Operators
What if the aliums are some sort of hive mind virus or particles? Mist-based aliums
>>30151337
I doubt just having an FTL drive means they've somehow become invincible to fast lead. Sure, they may have far superior weapons (say, small drones that have automatic splitsecond aiming and a laser cannon) but think about it, cavemen can still brain a modern soldier with a rock or stab them with a flint shiv. We could have a breakthrough and develop an FTL drive in the next decade, but that wouldnt instantly make us telekinetic reality-bending gods.
>>30152852
Flamethrower, baby!
>>30152843
man if aliens looked like that I'd ask for my ass to get probed.
>implying greys dont come to earth to enjoy the size of human penis
>>30152901
Firearms ain't shit. The first spoopy ayy encounter I was armed to the teeth. The second one I had a pistol in my night stand and a shotgun under my bed.
I'm not done reading the thread yet but I can tell you you're shit out of luck if you think a gun can save you. Best case scenario you've got a team of /k/ommandos as fire support like the guys in link related.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly–Hopkinsville_encounter
>>30152919
Then there's this asshole
>>30152201
no I want muscly dudes fighting aliens in mechs, with that kinda vibe, anything like that?
>>30144361
I always figured he just hit him too low, in the back instead of the neck or something. But yeah the whole "what? Aliens don't exist that's just the MIC creating a whole fake conspiracy with a fake group of conspirators who weren't really in charge but just did that stuff to look in charge even though no one ever saw them do a fucking thing."
>>30152967
That was clearly a bunch of drunk, spooked fudds shooting at owls. It's honestly one of the most easily explained "encounters" ever.
>>30153066
T. Horned Owl
How is Earth treating you these days?
>>30144430
>>30144504
>>30144519
>>30144548
>>30144551
>>30144685
>>30144696
This FBI agent's experience clarifies the effect of ayys on pistols. Start from 24:45ish to observe the ayy lmaos deliberate entry to a barricaded room.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3kow5u
>>30152987
Whoo man what I'd give. Slip me some of that sweet alien space magic.
Hell, if things go over well, maybe I'll let her fingerfuck my guns.
>>30152919
You obviously got a kinky alien dont sweat it
>>30151337
Humans have done great things, but we still have no cure for the common cold. Just because a species makes extreme advances in one field, doesn't mean they've mastered everything.
>>30153320
>aliens show up in FTL capable space fortresses
>declare earth theirs
>declare they will "pacify humanity" with their advanced weapons
>aliens descend wielding the equivalent of 1700's flintlocks
That would be hilarious.
How the fuck am I supposed to sleep now?
>>30153355
I'm pretty sure any alien species that can travel the universe would have no type of weaponry at all. A species can't advance that much with violence.
>>30153366
Hi bait we meet again
>>30153366
I seriously doubt that the need to kill other things from eating/raping you ends with planet Earth's evolutionary ladder.
>>30144399
that account of that family of hicks who'se trailer was getting sacked by greys, stated that said hicks were shooting the greys with a 12ga and 20ga and didn't kill them. although they were hitting the greys, they got the impression that the greys were just playing along by falling backward
there's this really funny, short flury of an account in mexiland where some older factory dudes are driving home. ufo stops their car. the mexi driver gets out to investigate, a grey runs out at him, mexi immediately pulls a pocket knife and stabs grey in the shoulder, who then flees back to ufo. mexi said the blade just glanced off, didn't penetrate at all.
>>30153365
Tucker yourself out first.
>>30153366
even tho some people diagree i think this is the most likely case
>>30144736
>triangles
thats ours though
>>30150507
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wfDF7uT2yQ
http://www.staradvertiser.com/breaking-news/idaho-pastor-who-spoke-at-ted-cruz-rally-shot-6-times-expected-to-survive/
>>30144815
>>30151125
>“It looks like everything is going to be fine,” Padula said Monday. “It’s amazing considering he was shot six times with a .45 at 15 feet.”
YOU
CANT
MAKE
THIS
UP
>>30153678
Maybe God is real and he's giving priests and pastors superpowers for the upcoming apocalypse.
Better get a nice chainsaw and invest in some gas, /k/
>>30152864
>We could have a breakthrough and develop an FTL drive in the next decade
this statement alone is proof you have absolutely no fucking idea what you're talking about.
>>30153695
he said could, COULD, he's speaking in the 'what if' sense.
go back and fuckin read again you goddamn idiot
>>30153735
I understand what hes saying, hes saying that a race of intelligent beings can take a massive leap forward in one very specific field of science while still being stunted elsewhere.
Im saying that actually ISNT possible as the sciences generally tend to advance together as they have a great deal of interdependence on each other despite the specialization of the subject matter.
If we had a sudden breakthrough allowing FTL travel in a decade you can damn well be assured that weapons developement is going to capatilize on all of the technological breakthroughs that make FTL travel possible in short order
tl;dr technological advances move together and move everything else forward too, always
so as I said, the poster i was replying to has no fucking idea whay he's talking about
>>30151465
whatever Malachi.
>>30153849
Depends on marketability. If you're dealing with a race with a globalized government that hasnt historically had much use for weapons, you can expect them to be behind the curve there but not necessarily elsewhere. New technology jumps disciplines and industries all the time, but you need a motivation to adapt it. If you don't think you need weapons, you're probably investing elsewhere.
Quick adaption when you find out you do need them though
>>30152880
>>30153901
I feel like any race that could conduct intergalactic exploration has probably thought of the possibility that they will encounter an intelligent and, more than likely, hostile race, and have prepared for That accordingly. I just don't think they would invest everything in travel, while leaving themselves completely defenseless.
greys are on our side, its the lizards that want us for food. we are the greys protectors, they have been assisting in our evolution for some time now.
>>30153355
>Flintlock wielding alien race suffers defeat after defeat on the battlefield at the hands of humanity.
>Eventually says "fuck it" and begins throwing specs of dust at superluminal speeds at Earth's cities.
>Humanity promptly surrenders to alien race who considers the tactics and technologies of the Napoleonic wars to be contemporary
Unfortunately, any alien species advanced enough to reach us would be way to powerful for us. We can't bargain with them, for we'd have nothing of value. We can't fight them, they would outclass us in every way. Why would they even have reason to care about us?
We can only hope that they're merciful.
[spoiler] And Cute [/SeriouslyWeNeedSpoilersOn/k/]
>>30153849
I wasn't saying our tech would stay the same after development of an FTL drive, I was saying that creating the means of interstellar travel doesnt necessarily make us omnipotent gods. Lets say next week some lab develops a method of manipulating space. It'd take years to fully research the physics, more to figure out how to arrange the effect into an Alcubierre drive, and more years developing a support system for it. Then theres the whole matter of making a spaceship. Does this mean humanity will have to make advancements in materials technology and engineering alongside the development in physics? Absolutely. Does it mean we'll have the same massive advancements in unrelated fields like medicine, or more pertinent to the conversation, weapons? Nope. There's a very good chance in this scenario that we'll be exploring space with conventional weapons. Sure, they may be fancy and better than the ones we have now, but just because we have a starship doesn't mean we'll be able to have telekinetic mind control and laser blasters.
>>30154238
Theres no telling how advanced an alien race will be. They may be only slightly higher tech than us, or even deficient in some areas. Plus, we've got a whole other SPECIESWORTH of art, literature, and history to share with them. What if, say, their home planets chemistry made it hard for them to create explosives, so they never invented guns and just had increasingly powerful bows and airguns? Theres no end to the speculation of what an alien race may or may not have, and its certain that we'd have something of worth to trade with them, even as a novelty.
>>30147146
For all we know interstellar travel, like a warp drive, might be achieved by a mechanical means.
Planes were flying long before people understood why. They knew how to get them in the air though.
The mechanics of a lifting wing could have been figured out in roman times if someone applied the scientific method to flat plates and imitation of bird wings.
>>30154354
think of it this way: are you interested in learning about the "culture" of ants? This is the most likely technological gap between us and a space-faring or interdimensional race of entities. We'd just be a curiosity, nothing more.
Also, another hypothesis is that they're farming us for our emotional energies, on which they feed; sound tinfoil but when you realize there are 10 dimension + time, and we're stuck in 3, makes you wonder what could exist in the other dimensions
>>30144736
What's odd is that you lived in an area with military jet traffic and assumed an unfamiliar shape was aliens and not an aircraft you just didn't recognize.
>>30154501
Go back to /a/ with your Puella Magi Madoka Magica "alien race feeding on emotion" bullshit lmao
>>30144815
>.45 FAGGOTS BTFO!!!!!!!
>>30153366
That just makes it easier.
Vigilo confido my friend.
>>30144279
3spooky5me m8
>>30154385
Didn't that one guy make wings for him and his son? Or was that just a Greek myth
>>30144430
>disable mechanical systems
Arms and legs are mechanical systems, desu
>>30147175
>how would silicon based lifeforms affect ballistics
>implying we've ever seen silicon based lifeforms
It probably wouldn't matter though
>>30151395
>in every way. Why would they even have reason to care about us? We can only hope that they're merciful.
what is that from its adorable
>>30154101
yep and then they need us as their killing machines for subjugating the rest of the universe and suddenly k finds them selfs with shitons of alien money
I've seen a 1000-2000 foot ufo. And I'm a skeptical mofo but that was nuts.
>>30147037
Not a thing
>>30148115
SHALL
>>30148436
>$300
>good sword
Kekd
>>30150892
It doesn't even prove that desu
>>30153678
>staradvertiser
What even is that
>>30151278
>ram a ship into our planet at ludicrous speed and level a city
try destroy the world.
>>30153017
maybe Blue Gender?
>>30154385
your post implies that you don't understand how planes fly
https://www.grc.nasa.gov/www/k-12/airplane/wrong1.html
>>30154774
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icarus
>>30144281
Fpbp
>>30152809
That's funny. It reminds me of a South Park episode where far future mankind was facing a crisis. They started sending refugees to present day, where they began taking over the menial labor job market. Two solutions were proposed to get rid of the future humans. First, fix the environment so the disaster doesn't happen. Second, have a gay orgy to reduce the population. After an hour of planting trees and picking up garbage, the refugees start to fade out of the timeline. The locals give up when they realize what hippy bullshit is happening and immediately begin option 2.
