In this thread we say shit our recruiters told us
>Bro you get paid pretty good dude
>dude they're not even gonna yell at a guy like you in basic brother
>>29608849
>Dude open mechanical is okay
>you'll get to fix jets all day or work with bombs
>>29608849
>dude you'll get to literally control and handle nuclear weapons
>>29608849
>dude you're totally not going to die for israel, jews did NOT do 9/11
>>29608849
>dude guns lmao
>dude uniform lmao
>dude adventurous training lmao
>you even get paid for it
>dude asthma is fine you don't do that much running anyway
>>29609031
>bro join he infantry man. You'll get deployed for sure, but you can get stationed in Germany and just hit up bars all week dude.
>say nothing at meps bro haha
I believed him too
>you're totally going to be able to fuck bitches bro
>dude there will be absolutely no gay sex trust me
dad was a recruiter and I'm still waiting for him to tell me his secrets when I join so I know what's bullshit.
I think he's gonna take his recruiting bullshit to his grave.
>no one will jizz in your bellybutton while you're sleeping I promise
>>29609069
>you're totally going to be able to fuck bitches bro
If they didn't say this to everyone, then we probably wouldn't have so many rapists and hooligans running around in here.
Ha. I joined the Air Force. I had to convince my recruiter, not the other way around. If you even remotely seemed like a flake and a waste of his time, he sent you to the Army down the hall.
You had to have no criminal convictions, and a decent ASVAB practice score just to gain an audience with him.
>>29609091
>you might get stationed to japan bro
>free rape card dude!
>>29609011
What'd you end up with?
>>29608849
A 91f? holy shit boy you will get to fix guns all day!!
More like cutting grass, plus all the weapons I fixed were for IET so they were all shit.
Hi, the fuck you guys do?
>we're the national guard.
So like you help with natural disasters?
>rarely, but yes.
Not for me...
>we also have a twenty thousand dollar enlistment bonus for infantry.
Infantry? I've played cawadooty 12 hours a day for the last five years I'm fucking ready!
>sign here.
Signed there
And that's the story of how an edgy teen-ager found employment and direction.
>>29608849
>your country will be proud of your service and you will recieve many benefits from dear old uncle sam
>va hospitals are top notch
>>29608849
>If you really want the girl you have been seeing since sophmore year to marry you become a marine
>bitches love that BAH
>>29608849
Didn't listen to it but this
>hey bro, if you join the guard you can totally transfer over to active duty and then get all the money
>>29609165
>enlistment bonus
Do any branches still do this?
>>29609183
Army does. Gonna get $5,000 in a few weeks.
>>29609171
>get home from Iraq
>gf has a brown baby
>It's your son anon I swear, BELIEVE ME
>>29609165
what's the national guard like anyways
I'm thinking about it but I have no idea what path to take, the stupid website teaches me nothing
>>29609183
Navy, got 25k. Managed not to kill myself too.
>>29608849
>"Interested in joining the Army?"
>Two years since I ETSd, Medically Retired (IED)
>Almost sure it was my same recruiter
>Don't remember him well, we used each other.
>Tell whoever all that, get awkward "Taint you for dur service" essentially.
>Laugh as he hangs up, and I wanted to be a lifer
>>29609011
That's what I did, ended up working on planes. What's your point?
>>29608849
I joined in 85, to be honest the only thing the recruiter said that I remember was where to get on the bus at and that its like any other job. After a short while it was, just a few more hours than most people would want.
>>29609202
$350,000 for Pararescue on completion of Indoc.
>>29609202
Fuck me, I might enlist earlier than I planned.
>>29609251
25k? This was pre-2008 right?
>>29609289
Yeah but you were actually good, if you're a lazy shit they just make you mow the grass.
>>29608849
If you utilize all of your benefits to their fullest extent, army pay isn't that bad.
I was essentially making 100K a year in the army if you prorate what my post-911 paid to my absurdly expensive private school and my BAH.
The Armed Forces, despite what /k/ will tell you about welfare queens, is NOT a bad gig for 4 years out of high-school. Stay out of combat arms and have a cohesive plan for what you're going to do when you get out.
>>29609230
>i was pregnant for extra long! thats why the baby i just had is so big!
>>29608849
>we have a slot for security forces shipping in 20 days, if you don't take it, you will wait a year or more to get any of the jobs you picked, if you go SF, you can just retrain and get the job you really want!
And so I proved that asvab scores are not an indicator of how smart you are.
>it's easy to go from enlisted to officer i just didnt feel like doing it
>>29609337
>mowing grass
Guessing army? I was talking about the air force. If you weren't good at your job, they just stick you in the tool crib or debrief.
>>29609388
Dont remind me,
>97
>infantry
>>29609060
>say nothing at meps bro haha
Isnt that what you're supposed to do?
>>29609412
I always had a different respect for mustangs, going green to gold was always neat for me to see for some odd reason.
>Listen, [redacted[, with your demeanor, test score and background you should probably look at OCS
>Alright, outside of OCS you should at least look at something hard to get, something that requires critical thinking, strong communication and can be transferred back to the private sector
>Man intelligence would probably suit you well, at least look review these MOS', come back and talk to me
>Brother, I'm telling you, I did a decade in the Airborne and playing football is the only way I got out of infantry life. You don't want that brother, Infantry, Airborne, Ranger, SF, any of that shit. Even if you make the cut I'm telling you, it will change you for the worse. Sleep on it brother.
I was the one dude who ever had a 100% truthful recruiter and I didn't listen to a fucking word he said. Won't say I regret it, some people have to learn shit the hard way.
>You will have more fun and have less college to pay for if you enlist straight out instead of doing ROTC.
>You can go from enlisted to flight school really easily after two years
Luckily, I'm not a fucking idiot.
>>29608849
If you ever smoked weed in your life you need to tell me. "I did seven years ago".
>thanks you fucking asshole
>>29609462
I meant I believed him about the other thing. Meps is just trying to scare you obviously, but I could see some retard getting fucked up by the mind games the recruiter and meps tell them.
>>29608849
So am I the only one that actually did research on my own before joining? Because apperantly everyone else is fucking retarded and gullible as fuck
>>29609326
Bullshit
Me: What's a Ranger? What's Special Forces Weapons Sergeant?
Him: You know what I always thought was cool? *Leans in.* Chemical..
Me: That's like, frontline shit? (This was March 2003, during Iraq war invasion.)
"NBC is frontline shit, if you are with the infantry."
Me: Well, I don't know.
Him: There's chicks.
>Signed.
>>29609103
>no convictions
>decent asvab score
Man those standards are practically unachievable I dont know how anyone could meet those requirements.
Sounds like your recruiter needed his cock sucked constantly and you were the most dutiful faggot around.
>>29609548
>failed out
>mad
>>29609590
No, I'm in the Army. I just don't believe you
>>29609571
You'd be surprised at the quality of people looking to join the chair force anon.
>wuzza feh-low-knee i donts know nigga where da guns at i wanna be a air-puh-lane pilot
>>29609571
This
>>29609598
>No, I'm in the Army.
I don't see anything refuting the post you quoted anon..
>>29609388
> I proved that asvab scores are not an indicator of how smart you are.
Says the crossdresser
>>29609610
Can't into reading comprehension huh?
>>>29609590
>Failed out
As in PJ Indoc
As in airforce
As in suck my balls
>>29609636
>Can't into reading comprehension huh?
Well the army is for people too stupid to get into a branch worth anything so no I think I understood well enough.
>>29609655
Whatever you say, chuckles. I'm gonna go back to lurking between shooting giggle switch weapons and blowing crap up.
Aussie recruiters dont tell us shit Tbh
nothing to hype anyway, just "why'd you pick rifleman? every MOS is technically a Combat MOS. you'll totally get an apprenticeship straight out of the Navy, even though you just sat around in the barracks doing fuckall for 4 years"
>>29609631
I'm not a crossdresser
>>29609744
So you're just a run of the mill Chair force fag then?
>>29609744
are you the tripfag that keeps some tranny's nuts in a jar?
>we can't get you an airborne slot, but don't worry, they'll offer you one once you get to benning.
>>29609798
Im still waiting for the airborne slot to open and i retired 6 years ago.
>>29609756
Basically
>>29609778
I am also trans, and I don't keep anyones nuts in a jar those don't belong to me and I don't touch them. She keeps her own testicles in 2 separate jars.
>cav scout is just like being a ranger but no ranger school
thankfully I didn't fall for that one but it made me chuckle once I found out how much of a lying faggot he was.
or
>this opportunity isn't available long, make a decision
>>29609817
Mentally ill 'people' please go.
Well I got a 98 on my asvab, I'd like to go into nuke if that would be possible
>oh hah you don't want that man go be an AZ and sit behind a computer
it's nice? I don't mind working with computers
>oh it's great man, its great i love my job
oh well yeah that sounds cool i guess
Fuck you AZ1 Bolden. Fuck you in half with a rake.
>>29609535
Money and benefits brah
>dude GI bill dude
Only applied to community colleges and trade schools.
Oh well at least I can into codemonkey and some CAD shit
>>29609598
>>29609636
Wow, army fags sure are butthurt. Next time you need help calling an airstrike or someone to haul ass to you for 40 miles with no air support in enemy territory, you won't be so bitter.
"You want to be a corpsman? Lets go talk to the Marine recruiter next door so you know what you're getting into"
Still did it anyways. Not a bad recruiter
>>29609571
I did RAP for him. 9/10 people that I interviewed didn't make it to him.
Don't be mad you couldn't join the Air Force. Must have been one of the ones I sent to the Marines.
>>29608849
>you'll get to go to Afghanistan bro
kill me
>>29609846
mmk now youre lying.
or youre dumb as fuck and listen to the joe network.
fuck you joe.
>>29609817
Fucking mutants
>>29609168
Well, they were half right.
>>29609817
>im jus liek everyone else, except im spesuhl
eat your Beretta
>>29609168
My autism has been triggered.
We walked on the moon in 1969
>>29608849
ITT: faggots who complain a lot.
I know you guys. You're the sandbaggers, the shitbags, and the malingerers.
fuck off lol
Not sure if this is om topic, nut fuck it there are air force people here.
My younger brother is in RoTC for the air force at a university in the midwest
How likely is he to be stuck at Wright Patt forever? He said he doesn't want to work there.
>>29609959
That's what (((they))) want you to believe goy.
>>29610018
60 days vacation on any USAF base if PJ or TACP, dude.
>>29610024
I'm not sure if you're a legitimate "muh moonlanding is fake" person, or if you're making fun of it.
fuck poe's law, it's now /pol/'s law
>>29610044
Damn. Why doesnt he want to work there, then?
>>29610057
We actually landed on the moon in 1968 but they faked a moonlanding in 1969 to cover it up.
>>29609516
Actually that is true. The part he left out though is that no one knows how to do it and no one will help you do it. So you have to figure it out for yourself. If your ASVAB is high enough you can go to warrant straight out of basic and on into flight.
ITT people who thought the military would just hand you everything. You recruiters didnt lie to you, YOU failed to take full advantage of the military. Every thing in the military is earned and your ability to get what you want has a tangible ammount of effort needed to get it.
Want airborne? DA 4187 yourself to an Airborne unit.
Wanna be SF, RANGER or Delta? Apply toSF or RANGER, get in and stand out as a fucking awesome Soldier.
Wanna fly? Do the fuck ton of paperwork and submit your packet...but you gotta be able to get that letter of recommendation from your CO so suck dick or kick ass, the choice is yours.
Wanna get paid well? Get promotted. Get on special details like CID, EOD, PSD ect
>Hurr i didnt get all the super cooll guy stuff because I half ass everything.
>>29609847
It's not even him being butthurt, it's just a fucking lie. Yeah cool dude, you're going to be a J, but you can look up reup bonuses, and PJ's aren't getting 350k
>>29609817
Does a tranny in the army look as horrible as I imagine?
>>29610018
>How likely is he to be stuck at Wright Patt forever?
>forever
not likely, if he does get stationed there he could be there for a few years, but there are many other bases, better and worse than Wright Patt. Also probably depends on his job where he can go.
Take that with a grain of salt though, as I was enlisted, not an officer.
>>29610214
>If your ASVAB is high enough you can go to warrant straight out of basic and on into flight.
shit is that true?
>>29610236
Much much worse than you can ever imagine.
All of the downsides of a woman and a man but none of the benefits of either.
A true freak.
>>29610310
I bet tumbler and reddit would be happy though and call you a shit lord
>>29609234
>18y/o M, college is 'spensive, enlist as medic in ANG
>survive BMT, have a blast in tech school, come back with greatly improved social skills
>get college paid for while drilling with an awesome med group
>go to med school
>oh no! state tuition reimbursement budget ran dry!
>go on active duty scholarship
>graduate med school, currently finishing intern year in FM residency
>pay date includes my 6yr enlisted == $$$
10/10 would enlist in ANG again
>>29609126
>>29609289
I'm an ammo troop. I just hang out with a few loaders and crew chiefs and can't help but feel bad for them. Especially being in AZ, poor crispy mother fuckers.
>>29609838
>>29609923
Fun fact, about 20% of all transgender individuals are veterans
Source: Grant, J., Mottet, L., Tanis, J., Harrison, j., keisling, M. (2012). National transgender discrimination survey. National center for transgender equality.
>Nuke MM recruiter
>"Wanna see some cool shit?"
>Show's pay
>Sign me up
I'm in A school hating my life on 25-4s
Never lied to me though, he said the school sucked cocks.
I refuse to join the military because there are some unstable fucks with mental issues on self control angers that will slice your Achilles tendons in your sleep if you so dare make bully the guy
>>29609843
Ha, what's it like to be a flying yeoman?
>>29610612
Beat them to it then.
>>29610549
>veterans are susceptible to mental illness
WHO
WOULDA
GUESSED
>>29610310
Fuck off you have no idea what I am like.
There are a lot of us spread throughout the military, and the ones I have met are some of the most dedicated individuals you will meet, in spite of the tremendous pressure of having to suffer under the standards of the wrong gender, and in most cases, not even being able to stop the irreversable damage done daily to their bodies by the unwanted testosterone.
>>29610666
Dem 6's you are truly /k/ Antichrist.
Post dem boobs.
>>29610612
>Achilles tendon cutter
I remember that post
Holy shit that guy was fucked up
>>29610666
If you where station in the military with antman how long would you realistically survive?
>>29610666
Actually it's the estrogen and the fucking CUT OFF BALLS damaging their bodies not testosterone.
You are men and nothing you do or say can ever change that. You can mutilate your bodies until you are unrecognizable lumps of flesh but you will be men until the day you die.
>>29610718
A very long time. A crazy fuck like that wouldn't last long.
>>29610737
The testosterone was awful and I am glad it is gone. I just wish I was allowed to grow my hair ;-;
>>29610773
Well realistically explain how would you survive antman's psychotic crazy rage and his army of weaponized ants
>>29609058
Heard this exact same thing when I told them I had a bad heart desu :(
>dude don't worry about it if you can run a mile you're good bro
Whatever. At least I'll die "serving" my country :(
>>29610773
>The testosterone was awful and I am glad it is gone
wew
>military
>"I'm glad I have no testosterone"
This is why woman and mutants shouldn't be allowed in the military.
>>29610309
Yes. But not as easy as it sounds. You will have to find a flight MOS warrant officer who will give you a LOR, pass the SIFT test, pass an interview and have an investigator asking your teachers what kind of person you are....and a fuck ton of paperwork with a deadline. But yes, you absolutely can go to warrant officer training for aviation right out of basic.
>>29610612
Found the post
>TRANNY FUCKING SHITS
>>29610880
And here is this to go with it
>>29610773
You know I'm not anti-gay, but Trans people are actually mentally sick. I'd fuck Bailey Jay all day every day, but honestly it's all in the mind. If people with severe schizophrenia can hallucinate as extremely as they do it wouldn't be a stretch to say Trans don't feel like the gender they are due to a mental illness although not as severe as say a schizo.
but whatever it's America do what you want just don't push that stupid bathroom shit down our throats.
>>29609050
>>29608849
72k yearly is good enough for me
>>29610666
Seek help my man. There is a drug that can halt your feelings of dysphoria.
You don't have to hate yourself any more
>>29608849
>bro dude lets discuss it over red lobster my treat
>bro dude you get to travel wherever
>bro dude you probably won't even have to kill anyone
Had to pay my tab,, only went to Afghanistan, and I killed.
>>29610959
What kind of idiot joins the infantry not knowing full well that the odds of you shooting someone at some point are high?
Your job description is literally to shoot people, march, and dig holes.
>>29610890
I have a soft heart and I'm just fine. Also, you think someone like me HASN'T been picked on at first? There is no excuse to hurt people like that. (Defending yourself and actual combat doesn't count obviously)
>>29610941
Yeah its hormones. Already on them
>>29610973
The biggest problem with trannies is that they make that their ENTIRE identity. Everything is second to their obsession with ruining their body and bending the people around them to their will.
The mental gymnastics you do to consider yourself normal is worthy of medal. Maybe Vanity Fair could help you with that.
Did anyone else have a recruiter try to lowball the shit out of them?
>few years back
>Mathematics degree 3.7 GPA, magna cum laude, good shape, extracurriculars up the ass
>go to recruiters office and ask about OCS
>"Ehhhhhh, I dunno bro, everyone's trying to be a navy officer nowadays. I MIGHT be able to get you somewhere in supply, but that's not a guarantee...."
>my fucking face
>>29610930
I'm beginning to think mental illness is actually a cover up for something else.
I mean, read the myths and legends and listen to the stories.
Golems, giants, things we would call "the universe doing what it does" end up being controlled by gods, simulation theory, etc.
All these are in widely accepted religions. Even in Christianity Jesus keeps trying to prove that anything is possible. I think that time travel is implied by the story of Lazarus and the rich man, I like to think they are the same person.
Zeitgeist says that the Christ is a recurring figure and he may well be, the world's greatest actors and performers often end up doing the same show over and over.
Do you ever dream? Have you ever dreamed things where it's obvious that there's a psychic connection between you and something else? Deja vu? Etc etc?
Maybe mental illness is just a fried circuit or defect in the system.
Shit, even spontaneous combustion is accepted as reality.
The majority of the world believes in the old testament, and the old testament outright says in the beginning life didn't originate from earth.
>>29610699
Not heard of this, care to explain?
>>29609103
trying to join the airforce, got a 92 on ASVAB but have a minor in possession of alcohol charge on my record and tattoo on my right leg practically up near my dick so out of sight. The recruiter I first went to essentially told me to fuck off, it would be sooooooo difficult to get me in. So I drove an hour away to a complete nig nog neighborhood where I kept overhearing people get their practice asvab scores back, most of them in the 30s-50s, people asking about pot charges, theft, and other various crimes, asking about how much tattoo can show while in uniform.. Sit down and this recruiter is essentially sucking my dick, telling me my charges will be no problem, says no one gives a fuck about my tattoo, then he asked me what I what, told him secuirty forces. His eyes looked like I got him the best gift ever, someone who qualifies and he doesn't have to trick into the security forces
>>29610973
Fuck off tranny.
You dont deserve to be in the military.
This is why the military is turning into a giant pussy fest, people with ADHD or Depression aren't allowed in but the second you say you're a dick mutilator, you get waivers.
>>29608849
>with those scores, you can have any job in the Army. How'd you like to be a white hat MP in Germany?
MFW when my tour in Germany is as a tower rat at a nuke site.
>>29609535
>look at me mommy told me I'm a special snowflake the post
>have a 4.0 gpa
>want to spend the rest of my life driving trains
>fail medical exam due to glasses + asthma
I just wanted to be an 88u working in buttfuck nowhere moving trains. I make more money in my current job (assistant operations supervisor at a battery factory) but I just wanted something simple. It would also give me an excuse to build a train set in my garage.
>>29611059
You WANT to be security forces?
Are you already in?
>>29611113
Fuck off attention whore.
>>29611130
What the hell? I was just trying to talk to another cop, who may possibly actually end up at my base if they are unlucky enough. (Unlucky Because of the area, not because of me)
>>29608849
Mine didn't give me shit, probably because it was Air guard and I told him what I wanted and that was that.
>have you ever smoked pot? no. weed? no. ganja? no. marijuana? no.. whacky tabaccy? no.. hash?... no... are we done? yup.
>allergies?
Years ago so on.. >good don't say anything and don't eat w/e
>Asthma?
Yeah I was cleared few years back >good enough we're not going through the paperwork again.
They don't bs you if you have some clue of what you want to do, besides trying to push you towards intel, fuck that 1 year wait for school dates.
>>29611158
Cancer
>>29611158
>tranny
>SF/MP
at last it all makes sense now
>nobody will jack off in your towel dude i promise bro.
https://clyp.it/l0pro1r2
>>29610828
Actually had a kid with a bad heart in basic with me. He died week 3 during PT. So keep that shit in mind
>>29608849
>dude, you hot 97 on your ASVAB, you could totally choose PJ's or a pilot
>you wanna join Ravens? What's ravens? Ohhh, yea, totaly get I to those
>actually, you'd probably just get into security forces, totally.
I didn't join because I read my papers. I was going to be a mechanic on a C130. I'm not doing that shit. That guy was the worst.
>>29608849
>Don't even put 1a9 on your listen I doubt you get it
Turns out this was a half lie, there are only 250ish of us in the air force. 26 training slots per year
"Nah man, they'll never check for CHILDHOOD asthma. When was the last time you wheezed?"
>>29609888
Lol yeah please keep huffing and puffing about how much of a special snowflake you are, im sure you're impressing everyone.
>>29610959
i remember watching my friends go through this shit, one would come by the high school and talk to all the guys who seemed to be somewhat interested and anyone who was in JROTC; he also brought them food, and took them out to eat and see movies.
I remember one time i was walking with my friend through the parking lot and the recruiter came by. He started chatting up my friend and gave him a bunch of ARMY branded shit. I went to shake the mans hand and he left me hanging. I told the recruiter and my buddy i had to go and told them to have a good day, buddy responded with "you too" and the recruiter wouldn't even acknowledge me. There were a few other instances like that. thought it was just that recruiter but a few other gave the me cold shoulder as well.
I really miss my friends.
>>29611044
Interesting post, anon. I don't get what you are getting at in regards to transfaggots, though.
So this thread is telling me recruiters are like car salesman who waste a portion of your life, unless you get lucky and find the guy who doesn't bullshit somehow.
>>29608849
My recruiter actually didn't bullshit me
>>29611972
Mine was honest too. He spent most of the time we were together telling me about what to expect in basic, and how to avoid being "that one guy the TI always assrapes". He was a good man.
I guess AF recruiters are different than the other branches?
>>29609548
Of course
>>29609843
Fuck that's surprising, as soon as I got a 99 on my asvab my recruiter pushed nuke nonstop
>>29612026
ANG recruiter tried to BS me a little but never tried to pull anything, was actually truthful but tried to sell me a job I wouldn't want for more than a year, since they really didnt have much to offer.
an air force guy I know doesnt bullshit either, he just sucks cock. told me like a week beforehand to study for the AFOQT and the night before I have to drive 3 hours to go take the test, says to be at the hotel at 10am.
he just wanted me to sign some medical paperwork he falsified so he wouldnt have to fill out another set of forms
raped the entire test anyway.
>>29610309
Yes but highly unlikely
>>29612026
Mine was actually for the navy. He and all the guys at the office are real chill dudes and don't sugar coat anything.
>>29611905
One anon believes trannys are mentally ill and my post was to explain that mental illness might not be what you think.
For example the old testament documents god driving a king mad, causing him to think he was a cow or something and for a few years he ate grass and lived outside until god fixed him.
>>29610541
>roll up to jet with a 226 full of 82s or BDU-50s
>Chock and brake trailer
>untie bombs
>sit in bobtail with AC blasting while I watch loaders toil over a hot jammer through my side mirror
Fucking flighline, never ever.
>>29610236
Doesnt matter they kick them out anyway
"Army 2011 ft jackson"
>>29608849
My recruiter seemed fairly genuine, he never really dressed anything up for me. The dumbest thing he ever told me was "The Army is the only branch of the service where you actually pick your MOS". Didn't try to sell me on one job or another, just let me ask questions about all the different ones and he'd answer. Never dressed anything up or got all gung ho.
I didn't get in, they found a heart murmur at MEPS which I ended up having surgery for a while later, but my recruiter was a cool guy. Even after I was disqualified for service I'd still stop into his office every now and then when I was out and about and we'd just shoot the shit for a while if he wasn't busy. Half the time he was surfing craigslist when I stopped in.
>>29608849
>>29609175
this one hits far too close to home..
>dude if you cant find the job you want active side, go reserve and then toss up a 4187 and go active after you report XD
>take 25C for 10k bonus and 40k loan repayment
some of the best and worst 3 years of my career.. however, reported and immediately got deployed, made E5, then rolled over active and kept my damn stripes after a serious uphill fight with Humongous Retard Command.
Still in the recruiting process but
>If you can run 1km and 20 pushups you'll do fine in basic!
>>29611226
>>29611352
>implying there is anything wrong with being a mechanic on a C-130
>aircraft maintenance is cool
>avionics is totally awesome
>computers and shit on aircraft
>>29612541
He's not exactly lying. The whole point of basic is to get your ass in shape
>>29611158
post a picture of yourself. I need to know how gay to feel after fapping.
>>29611226
God dammit, that was fucking amazing.
>>29609464
they have a better understanding of enlisted men seeing as they were boots once themselves. they're just not nearly as common as most officers who got commissioned out of ollege
>>29611158
Personally I couldn't give a shit about whenever somebody is a tranny or not, and I have no idea who you are in the first place honestly. Somebody mind explaining how come everybody hates the uh.. should I call Sarge a "guy" or a 'girl'? Never got the naming right.
>>29609571
Succinctly and completely annihilated, good job.
>>29610666
>Fuck off you have no idea what I am like.
As said by boring, predictable, fucking plain people since the dawn of man. Eat shit my man.
>go to marine recruiter
>guy says I look physically fit
>asks me 900 times if I have kids. No
>tell him I'm 23
>say I want to join infantry
>get 95 on avsab
>asks me of I want to "Fuck up Isis"
>say I don't see why not
Then he found out I don't have a diploma. He wasn't even mad.
Dropping out of high school to get a job was dumb. I should have just graduated, then joined at 18
>National Guard recruiter messaging my friend on FB
>friend asks him if they teach you how to quick scope
>recruiter doesn't get it
>friends asks if he'll get to 360 noscope Arab kids
>recruiter must have googled it
>end of messages
>>29611854
>what are social skills
mfw i used to be a recruiter 2012-2015
>>29613714
got any interesting stories?
>>29613724
all kinds but I have class in the morning so ill check this thread and maybe post at school
>if you join as something we need now you can get in quick than put in a corps transfer and be what you really want!
Wasted 3 years in ordnance before finally being approved to change to 343.
Fucking recruiters
My af recruiter said he couldn't guarantee me any mos and i would have to be open to other things than atc. I was going to just look at the ones with the highest requirements and pick from what i think could be useful when i get out. Is that a decent way to go? Any recomendations? I got a 77 on my practice test and he said that was good but 77 to me seems pretty average.
>>29609326
That's bullshit 300k makes you legally eleigable to separate or have the respective branch separate you (citation needed)
>>29613932
Definitely get something that's gonna teach you skills that are transferable to a civilian career.
>>29608849
> we'll have you shipped off to basic in two weeks tops!
Does the mind crippling depression from working a job you hate for 12 hours and the asshole people that work the same job with you and loss of all sense of self identity that he didn't tell you about count for this thread?
>>29613932
Stay out of any form of maintenence it carries over nicely but you will be constantly getting fucked over almost daily
>>29610941
Yup
>>29613954
They never made promises regarding this, but I had no idea I'd be waiting till this October
>>29610637
pretty comfy desu, because the entire job is protocol based and program troubleshooting, you get the opportunity to tell A LOT of higher ups to fuck off.
downside is a lot of people hate it, find it soul sucking and numbing. I personally don't mind it because i get out of the office as much as i can, as I have a few proteges. The only thing that got me to reenlist is just that I get to lead and develop people into achieving their potential.
>>29613940
what do you mean by separate?
>>29609959
I loved that show, that episode was amazing
>>29609418
They have us pull weeds and remove cobwebs if we have DVs coming through. That's not too often however and we are backshop, so there's a nice break room awaiting us.
>>29613714
have you ever seen a dependency waiver get denied by battalion commander?
Never served but I remember when I got my first job out of college and was at the grocery store as a manager a recruiter was following me around. For like three weeks. I guess he thought I was just a stocky or something.
> hey man you ever think about going in the military? They can pay for college!
> nah I'm good, I have a four year degree from a really good college in business administration
> hey man, you can make way more money in the military than here!
> this place started me at $58k, pretty sure low rank enlisted and even officers make jack shit
> but the benefits! Come on by and see me at the recruiters office!
Eventually I just called and complained to the local recruiting office because he was hanging around my store and jumping pretty much any 17 to 25 year old male to walk in, and hassling the same employees several times a week.
I get he's just doing his job, but fuck that guy was irritating.
>>29615504
ive never seen one get approved
>>29615648
You're the recruiter mentioned earlier?
>>29615648
my recruiter said they never saw one get denied
>>29615717
>You must now decide who is more trustworthy
>/k/ or an army recruiter
I do not envy you this decision
>>29615615
>$58k as a grocery store manager
shut the fuck up you retarded, lying piece of shit.
you're just a pussy and that's why you didn't join. suck it up and admit it.
>>29615772
>every /meg/ thread
>>29615792
http://corporate.publix.com/careers/stores
Not sure what is so weird about that. I was the grocery manager for a Publix and stayed there for about 2 years.
>>29615792
>he hasn't heard of aldis
managers make like $23/hour
>>29609958
gets me EVERYTIME!
>>29608849
>REMEMBER SOLDIERS
>N.O. = NUMEROUS OPPORTUNITIES
>Y.E.S. = YOUR ENLISTMENT ENDS
>>29609105
Jap here, top lel
>>29610959
>don't want to kill people
>enlist in the military
Truly one of the greatest minds of our time.
>>29614209
If you have too much money the military doesn't want you.
Most of their motivation comes from threatening your paycheck
If you don't need a paycheck they can't control you
>>29616669
If you win the lotto the'll kick you out
>>29616479
Your Enlistment Stops
>Be in HS
> School has a policy where every male takes the ASVAB in sophomore year
>basic shit
>two weeks later, having family dinner at home when the doorbell rings
>"Good evening, Mr./Mrs. Anon, can I talk to you about your son"
>Scored high enough on the ASVAB to have a recruiter come directly to my house
>"We can send him to an OCS, or join the Navy nuclear program, or apply for candidacy as an 18X"
>Parents be so proud, "You should enlist son!"
>mfw, when years later, no officer rank, no nuclear program, no special forces, just your average 45B/91F weapons armorer.
>>29616726
Have some more porn, courtesy of Uncle Sam.
>>29615792
did you have to go full retard?
Not a recruiter, but the conscription papers I got after the initial screening for service said I was chosen and that I was among the "cream of Norwegian youth"
I actually chuckled irl when I read that, I was just a skinny teenager playing video games most of the time and had enough self awareness to know I wasn't exactly the cream of the crop. But I guess I scored pretty good on the mental test and the physical test was a joke. All the doctor did was to make sure my spine was straight, he listened to my lungs in case there was something wrong with them and asked me about me health history. That was all. 10/10 physical specimen :DDD
Fucker told me I would get free haircuts.
>>29616711
My recruiter said "ends"
I started to realize what I was getting into at that moment.
>>29608849
>sorry dude, we have literally nothing else open but nuke
>if you sign away 10 years of your life you'll get a nice fat bonus, man
>when you get out you'll get a cushy six figure salary by working at a plant
NICE TRY FUCKERS, BUT YOU CAN"T FUCK ME.
ONLY I CAN FUCK ME!
I crushed my ASVAB with a 99 had an overall 143 GT score. The recruiter was trying to push me towards intel but I told him I was joining the Army to be a medic. They told me about the huge bonus if I took the 35W slot (60k on completing language school and training at the time) but I told him I was really only interested in being a medic. Only got a 2k bonus which both my S1 and finance fucked up when I tried to collect and I never even saw it. Oh well. Did my time, deployed twice and I got out as a Sergeant. The Army is soft as shit these days and full of bullshit but I still loved my time in. If you think the recruiter is a salesman wait till youre on your way out and in your mandatory meeting with the Guard recruiter. My guy was heartbroken when I told him I was just doing IRR and basically has me convinced that I will get recalled but thats a risk I was willing to take.
>>29617050
>NICE TRY FUCKERS, BUT YOU CAN"T FUCK ME.
>ONLY I CAN FUCK ME!
I don't know why but I laughed HARD at this
took my special forces vet dad to the recruiter with me today, because i was tired of them beating around the bush and trying to feed me bullshit. its pretty funny to see the difference when they're talking to a dumb kid that doesn't know shit, and a legit army guy who served 25 years.
i've been trying to get my asvab/physical scheduled for a month but i need to do x, have to fill out y first, let me check on z.
dad walked in, "i want to speak to NCOIC" we went in his office, he started the same bullshit my recruiter did, dad cuts him off, tells him to stfu and stop playing dumb. 5 minutes later i'm scheduling my asvab/meps for next week
>>29616726
That's more your own fault and your parents fault for not doing some research.
air force recruiter fag here to interpret the truths your brain fucked up as lies
>>29613692
what do you mean
>>29617485
Thanks for trying to serve but bringing in your dad is NOT the way to do things. Hes a good resource for you to get info but dont let him fight your battles for you anymore. Honestly, they probably had just already made their goal for the month and were trying to delay you so that they had a sure recruit when they need it next.
Signed Army Reserve, 91B, got out of AIT in Feb. It was okay. The job is meh but my platoon is chill as fuck, compared to other in the company. I got lucky.
Pic related is nice, just got it.
>>29617485
they're gonna fuck you over so hard it's not even funny.
>>29617613
Also this is my ASVAB.
Getting US citizenship was the main reason why I joined and at the time Army was the only one offering non-green card holders enlistment.
If I could I would have done Airforce or any other job in the Army but because I wasn't a citizen at the time of enlistment any clearance MOSes were unavailable. My UA looked at my line scores when I inprocessed and asked me why am I there, I said "I know right".
It's okay tho, they are sending me to some schools this summer. Reclass is possible.
>>29617485
Taking a parent can be ok, and is required if you're 17. However in your case they're probably gonna give you shit jobs meps.
>>29617602
yeah this was the one and only time, but i get it
>>29617627
how so?
>>29609377
>I missed you so much baby. Oh that guy on my facebook? He's just my friend from the gym. I wanted to get fit and sexy for you and he was helping me with....yoga....
>>29609050
The same guy from pol frequenting everey thread. Fuck off already.
>>29617640
do recruiters and meps people talk like that?
>hey this kid is a pain in my ass, make sure to only offer him chute rigger
>>29608849
Mine doesn't really tell me anything beyond where I need to show up and when. We small talk and he's a pretty cool dude, but he doesn't shove anything down my throat or try to force me in any particular direction. He was an 11b, served in OIF and OEF.
Im talking to Marine Recruiter in less than a half hour
wat do?
>inb4 "don't join the marines
>EOD? Hell no man, those guys are losers, they just basically throw things away, it's "disposal" for a reason
then I find out I should have gone EOD since they make amazing money outside and I would have had 99999% more fun
>flight school? well I guess you scored high enough, but if you sign up as enlisted you'll KNOW the helicopter first!
scored in the top 1% of all applicants, and the second part is bullshit
fuck all recruiters,but I'm out now so fuck everything I guess.
>>29617735
Ask him his MOS casually, if he was Infantry or MP he's probably going to lie less.
>>29609827
This one. Oh god this one. Or
>Air Cav? Oh holy shit yeah dude. It's just like it was in Nam. Closest thing we haven't drop ship deployment in this day and age. Plus the rotor wash gives you a couple minutes concealment in the desert so you can see them but they can't see you.
Oh my fucking god you lying mother fucking asshole!
>>29617753
I do believe he was infantry
He also won't stop calling me his "bro"
>>29617735
Just don't sperg out and listen to whats being told to you. You aren't a marine yet and are under no obligation until the day you set off to basic. Remember you don't get your exact mos only the field so dont believe if he says he can get you exactly what you want. Also don't join the marines.
>>29608849
>recruiters
ha, US is a funny place.
>>29617787 Coast guard it is
>>29617648
well, walking in with your dad is one thing. Walking in with your dad who thinks he knows how recruiting works is another. Showing up and flexing nuts like that never ends well. Plus, it's the army, they fuck over everyone.
>>29610485
And that gentlemen is how the system works. Sweat your ass off for years. Work yourself till your dog tired. Remember what forms to fill out. A dash of luck, good timing, be on the ball, and boom, a dirty skanky stack of sweet hot stinky cash and skills that translate into a well paying career afterward.
Even if you're infantry, look around for classes and workshops you can take in your down time. Pick up extra skill specialties. Not only will it give you a greater range of jobs to chase but it also keeps you from getting the GI blues and running off with your squad mates to do something stupid or wasting all your cash on beer and strippers.
>>29611158
faggot
>>29617767
I wonder if Air Cav will even be a thing now that Kiowas are retiring? They say AH-64s will take over the scout role along with their attack function but the Kiowas were bad ass. I always loved hearing when one of the pilots would get a confirmed kill with their M4.
>>29617037
Fuck man...this. At least this, c'mon!!!
>>29617780
Recruiters just do that
>>29617037
Wait you're telling me haircuts aren't free?
how many waivers can i get? i need 2, is that too many?
>>29618242
Depends what service and what youre trying to do. Some things are not waiverable others are.
>>29618358
i asked here >>29618412 too
>>29617581
I wanna be TACP, what do? Got a 94 on ASVAB and am in good shape.
>>29618093
nope, they even took money out of your pay for the haircuts you got in boot camp. idk about you guys but on parris island those nigger barbers got paid 14 bucks an hour to literally scalp white boys while talking all kinds of shit to them
>>29619146
you arent going to be a TACP, if you dont believe and enlist anyway I dont blame you since your naive but please just know you want become a TACP
>>29609469
Just... wow.
>>29619189
why not?
>>29619170
Well shit I guess it's time to learn to clip my own hair
>>29610015
Joining the military is dumb people than want to make big explosion, dumb people that can get a real job, and fags that like to be anally pounded raw dog by their whole unit.
You spend your best years sitting on a base somewhere, or in a sandbox being mortared by hajjis. The pay is fucking table scraps, and the benefits are trash these days.
And keep in mind all you accomplish is protecting corporate america's right to bear burgers in 3rd world countries.
>>29611226
holy shit my sides
>>29609469
Is officer life really that much better?
Why don't people just get a degree?
>>29619280
a whole bunch of factors, but to boil them down your battalion will screw you over + the military isnt what you expected and its very political + you will lose motivation + even if you went to the school whose to say your going to make it.
having goals is nice but just focus on enlisting first, then worry about special schools like that after you actually know what the gay ass military life entails.
>>29619358
Conscript vatnik get back to work
>>29608849
>Intel is cool man you get to do like spy shit
So fucking boring kill me now I've done cool shit like 3 times in my career
>>29619170
>those nigger barbers got paid 14 bucks an hour to literally scalp white boys while talking all kinds of shit to them
that's a sweet gig, right there
