SCENARIO TIME
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You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
>BOOM BOOM CRASH
scenario 1: man armed with a blunt object has broken into your house while you're in bed what do you do?
>>29473649
I would dream of unleashing a 30 round mag of .45 acp from my kriss vector. But I am a poorfag. So I would just grab my tactical knife and have brawl.
>>29473649
Grab KSG lob slugs till dead
>>29473649
15 rds of 7.62 real Fuckin Slavic center mass then reload, call popo and wait.
>>29473649
Slip on my hockey mask, and grab my machete or whatever long sharp horrifying tool I can get my hands on and impale him.
I keep my sig rifle next to me on the bed when I sleep, concealed by a pile of clothes.
>>29473649
Grab desk lamp and beat the shit out of him. Hope that while ripping it out of the wall sparks fly and some shock and awe is struck
Stop making this thread.
Grab mosin
Load Red Army Specials
Fix bayonet
Tell him to get out of here
Scream PAPALI PAPALI CYKA as I fire into him while simultaneously giving me eternal EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
roll out of bed naked, put on my vibram five fingers, then rush him while crying
>>29473745
No gun detected enjoy being bludgeoned
grab flintlock, measure out powder for tray and to pour down muzzle. grab the wad and ball, pack it down nice. wait for dindu to round corner and hope he doesn't rush me in the delay between the primer and main charge. miss at 25 feet because non rifled, but at least I die with the glorious smell of black powder in my nostrils
Is magdumping into an intruder a bad idea or is that what you are supposed to do?
>go into garage
>start up Tank
>load HE round
>blow up house with dindu inside
Prolly put many 9x19 Hornaday rubber tipped bullet thingys in his organs
>BOOM BOOM CRASH
Buddy you're a boy make a big noise
Playing in the street gonna be a big man some day
You got mud on your face
You big disgrace
Tactical roll out of bed, no clothes on so my weapon will not be on my person. I'll use my mossberg 590a1 to shoot whatever is moving. Then I'll turn on the lights. Puke at the carnage. Shove it out of the apartment and ask the neighbors what pranksters left their compost on the doorstep.
>>29474071
It is after all, the song of my people
>>29473873
In the US, it kind of depends on the state. Some states you can shoot someone just for trespassing, others you get an inquest and, possible jail time if they were unarmed.
>>29473649
Grab flamethrower and torch my entire house in the process of defense
>>29474104
>>29474102
If he comes through my door, after wiping his little feet on my unwelcome mat, I'll add some extra holes and then we can worry about those silly laws.
>>29473649
>>29474102
I'll take my chances after I fill his dead body with many 19mm rubber tipped jhps
I have a ball bat under my bed I guess
>>29473649
grab my gun, bust out of the room and draw down on the fucker demanding that he get on the ground and yield his weapon.
>>29474420
Probably this DESU
I don't really have a fantasy of shooting someone just because I can, I'd really prefer they did something personally threatening to me first.
>>29473649
The South African home invasion video posted on /k/ earlier got me paranoid so I have a my springfield XD-9 and my old 12ga at my desk. I think i'd be good if I didn't poop myself too hard.
>>29473649
I sleep with an M&P .40 compact loaded with gold dot hollow points under my pillow so.. I guess I rack one, roll off the far side of the bed and aim at the doorway
>>29473649
Charge at him with my shotgun, one slug in his leg and then turn on the lights.
>>29473649
Grab the shotgun from the cabinet next to my bed and try and pretend I don't have a raging boner.
>>29473684
This
>>29474743
>XD-9 and Shotgun on desk
Are you me?
>>29474887
Aw twinzies! But really whenever I see someone else on /k/ has an XD-9 I feel all included.
Grab my Ruger P89 and get into a firefight, run out of ammo and chuck the gun at his head cracking his skull open because my Ruger is heavy as fuck.
>>29473649
Gun in one hand, sword in the other, engage and eliminate the threat.
>>29474929
It rotates. sometimes the shotgun is my wasr or that one time I had my M-H with its 3 point spike bayonet jammed into a cardboard box that pushed me over the edge. But the XD always has a spot on my desk above and to the right my mouses' wire.
I like my XD plenty too. I dunno why it gets all the hate. Who gives a shit if its a glock clone, i like it go fuck yourself nigga
also more porco rosso
>>29474939
Forgot pic sorry
Use the cz52 under my pillow.
>>29473649
Wait behind corner with blunt object while wife calls the popo and hope I can take him cause my 30.06 would fo through him the wall and potentially the neighbor so hand to hand it is.
>>29474957
No way! I switch between the shotgun and my WASR, not even joking. The WASR generally migrates to my desk when playing stalker. My XD has never jammed. I have never owned a glock but I can't imagine it being much better, they certainly seem to be of similar quality.
>>29473748
>FUCKING STALKER GET OUT EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>29473649
>blunt object
He just made my decade.
>hear him rummaging around.
>stifle giggle
>hide boner
>grab my custom built, 20lb, pike topped, rear spiked warhammer
>remove it from Sterno bath bucket
>chuckle bubbles up from deep within
>light that mother on fire
>kick open bedroom door
>buck ass nude
What? I like sleeping naked.
>letting out deep batshit crazy bellowing laughter
>swing my flaming 20lb doomhammer
>if I hit....cool... If not...well momma didn't raise a quitter
You guys have no idea how long I have been waiting for that day to come.
Call the police while fleeing my home, because this is Canada and I have a duty to retreat.
>>29475003
You really keep it ready in sterno?
>grab HD weapon
>teleport behind him
>"let's not turn this rape into a murder"
>>29475071
It's all metal. Except for the grip. But yeah.
>>29473748
ANUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU CHEEKI BREEKI
>>29473745
You stop making this thread on 4chan.
A feeling of relief and freedom washes over you.
Followed by a feeling of bat.
>>29473649
>drop my underwear
>tape my nuts to my asshole
>drop into a half squat so my nutless cock is dangling in the wind
>grab Marlin 30-30
>crabwalk out into my front room and start gyrating as I shoot him
>>29473748
Or you could throw mosin
>>29473649
Field test my creation.
Giggle a little.
Glock 30 with an extra mag and light right next to the bed.
AR and shotty within a few feet in the closet.
I'm gonna be ok.
Lets see I'm Australian so:
>no guns
>fuck it use hand to hand combat on the cunt
>accidentally kill him
>get charged with murder
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-03-29/man-charged-alleged-intruder-murder-remains-custody/7280312
>>29476001
>All of that.
...Fucking really?
>>29476023
Yeah that's real here in straya, fucking criminals have no issues getting guns yet responsible law abiding adults can't.
Not only that you get charged if you use "disproportionate force" on a house invader.
There was a case a while back where some junkie murdered a baby while robbing a place, yet the mother would have been charged as well had she hurt the sack of shit.
I know retards in your country want gun control and use us as an example, its completely fucked us and made the general populace vulnerable to criminals.
http://www.news.com.au/national/crime/mother-of-baby-zayden-randomly-murdered-by-ice-addict-opens-up/news-story/fbae7a10d49b3440b2eb0ef76fe84ee6
>>29476055
Jesus man, that's horrible, can't even defend yourselves...
Your government would shit their pants in the average American home.
>>29476055
Just out of cutiosity if you are kind of out of the way from other people you could just burry them in your backyard or something and they would never find out. What is the guy gonna do tell everyone "hey guys im gonna go rob that house at this address call the cops if im not back in an hour"
>grab new tokarev
>shove in magazine like how i'll shove my dick into the intruder's anus
>empty pistol into intruder
>jizz wildly
>Stick bayonet on AR.
>Later arrested for stabbing a man to death with a gun.
>>29476089
Yeah its fucked, "disproportionate force" doesn't take into account the unknown intentions of the criminal - he may be there to steal or he may be there to rape and murder you, how the fuck can you know.
In the batterham case the home invader was a convicted sex offender in his daughter's room, how the fuck do you expect any father to react?
>>29476091
M8 that would look like murder, but yeah again its this retarded idea of "disproportionate force" which doesn't apply in home invasions.
>>29476132
Only way to make it fair is to invade the home invaders home!
>>29476141
Gun control is fucking stupid because CRIMINALS DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT BREAKING THE LAW.
Seriously don't ever let go of the second amendment, and disregard anyone who uses us an example
>>29476146
>Gun control is fucking stupid because CRIMINALS DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT BREAKING THE LAW.
Ho. Le. Shit.
Guys, the Australians figured it out!
THEY FIGURED IT OUT!
>>29476154
Gun rights is politically dead, neither major political party will bring it back and the majority of the population supports it
same in France, I have to use proportionate force.
I will call the popo and tell them that someone is here to steal my guns, normally they'll show in some minutes, in the same time, I have absolutely no idea what I can do to prevent the undesirable to enter. If he has a blunt object I can only go for the same (no knifes), I have a blunt sword, I can medieval his ass maybe but I am not a hand to hand combat person.
>>29476165
Yeah, you guys are fucked as a country, but I have a optimistic hope that America will not go full retard.
Optimism!
>>29476180
Can I come over and enjoy your glorious freedom?
>>29476175
>but I am not a hand to hand combat person.
No shit, you're French.
>>29476185
Hell yeah you can, that's what makes this place great.
And in a few years you can become a full fledged citizen and shoot Mexicans!
>>29476186
Please…
>>29476195
Even the leotards are surrender colored.
>>29473748
god could you imagine firing a mosin indoors with no ear pro™
>reach slightly to the left and pick up flashlight, 1911 and mag
>insert mag and tactical rack and roll out of bed
>put flashlight on stun
>insert rounds into moving objects
>>29473649
I sleep with my SKS under my bed. If by some odd chance I've forgotten to load it the night before, I'll just skewer him with the bayonet.
>>29473649
I have a crossbow in my bedroom so id but a bolt in his leg
>shoot mosin inside
>EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>29473649
Shoot him
Go back to sleep
>>29473649
Nothing. That was my decoy house.
Britfag, so I'd just glass the fucker with an old wine bottle I keep in my room
Same situation as Ausfags in regards to home defense in the UK, but luckily in all my years living around the country and in London I have yet to hear of a neighbour/local who gets into US-style home defense situation
>Lay in bed
>Hear door get kicked open
>Lay in bed
>Hear footsteps coming up to my bed room door
>Hear the door knob rattle
>Burglar comes into room
>I lay seductively on my bed
>"Come to plunder my house...or me~?"
>Burglar is confused
>Activate my trap card.
Alternatively
>Get the burglar on the bed
>Bash his head up against the headboard
>Shotgun slams into his face.
Call the police.
Listen if he starts fucking with my stuff. If he does try to confront him, if not wait. The cop station is fairly close and there's no reason to make this a bigger mess than it needs to be.
>>29476165
So much for representative democracy.
>wake up to some homie dindu in my house
>can tell strictly from the scent
>feelitintheair.mp4
>grab obrez already cocked and loaded
>crouch/roll towards dindu's approximation
>stand up saying in the deepest voice I can muster "DROPIT NIGGER"
>don't even give him a chance to drop anything by blowing him away
>his body lays in the next room over, burning a ring around the basketball sized exit hole
>make a pot of coffee while working on cleaning up
Go back to sleep, the traps will get him.
>One man
>Blunt object
Wrastle him for keepsies on any item in the house
>>29474076
Underrated post
>>29473649
>man armed with a blunt object
Never bring a blunt object to a pointy object fight.
>>29473649
Fix the bayonet on my nugget and go ham. Fuck shooting him I only have steel core.
>>29473649
laugh hysterically as my ridgeback eats his face
I have 8 bear traps in total.
I leave 4 covered by brand new cheap 1 dolllar clothes in front of the back and front door.
I know it's illegal but i'm a cop so my bros got my back
