Bath/Shower Defence
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You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
How many of you here keep a weapon with you when you are taking a bath/Shower? Seems like a place where you could be vulnerable, me, I keep an old Glock 17 in my bathroom permanently.
>>27913857
rubber duck will protect me
You can never have too much firepower while you poop.
I've got a challenge for you all. I've hidden a gun somewhere in this picture. See if you can find it.
![titan-stainless-bg[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/XjxnRxt.png "titan-stainless-bg[1].png")
Everyone should have a bum gun installed in their bathroom. Not like many US houses have toilets and showers detached like other countries
>>27914019
dam nigga clean your toilet, nobody wanna see that shit
And if it isnt the SKS, i think its around the trashcan
>>27914037
I have one and I love it
Beretta 92 hidden under a kleenex box inside a tissue box cover.
No, it doesn't rust, my bathroom doesn't get that humid.
>>27914019
Why do you have SpongeBob toothpaste?
>>27914019
I think its that FAMAS behind the listerine.
>>27914006
just a little, though, right? right??
>>27914076
Why do you not have spongebob toothpaste?
>>27914106
I've used it and it tastes like garbage.
![toto3[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/SNivDVm.jpg "toto3[1].jpg")
>>27914094
>>27914071
I really want a japanese style ass blaster. The ones I want cost more than most of my guns though.
Really, why don't we, Americans, like clean assholes? More people need to buy them so they get cheaper.
>>27914121
Fair enough. I can't stand the shitty mint they throw into most toothpaste and Spongebob is one of the few I've found that doesn't taste like shit to me.
>tfw mint and peppermint are forced into all dental products
Life is suffering.
>>27914094
>pilonidal cysts
I know that feel and it is a terrible terrible feel.
>>27914138
Westerner are weird. Wiping yer ass with tissues instead of washing it with water and proper hygiene product.
>>27914019
Either clean the toilet or post pics of you licking the dirty part while talking dirty about your famas
>>27914138
related I guess
>>27914164
I think it's mostly just americans, canadians, and australians that don't like water up their ass.
>>27913857
I don't have any guns in the bathroom. I'll just throw toilet bowl cleaner at them if need be.
I keep a SCUBA knife hanging from the shower rod.
Don't want to vacuum seal a gun.
>>27914149
Pretty sure Crest makes cinnamon flavored toothpaste.
>>27914352
Oh yeah I forgot to mention I hate that too. It's the worst when I go to the dentist and they floss you. The only options they have are
>Mint
>Peppermint
>Cinnamon
It's like the epitome of a first world problem and it's literally the worst thing ever.
>>27914368
I would rather have all those combined than dentist bubblegum.
>>27914076
Probably his kids, there's a normal tube next to it
>>27914410
Nah the normal tube's my roommate's. You think someone responsible enough to have kids would have a bathroom that disgusting?
>>27914138
I bought a reasonably cheap bidet off Amazon after a trip to Japan a few years back.
I will never not have one in my house now.
>>27914388
Holy shit, you are so right.
That pasty crap is the nasty.
What firearm?
>>27914668
>That TP holder
Whoever designed your bathroom should be shot.
>>27914668
>>27914748
holy shit why
>>27914531
how do they feel?
>>27914762
Not him but the cold water, if you don't buy a heated model, can take some getting used to but clean butts are very nice, cut my toilet paper consumption to almost one roll a month because I only need a couple sheets to wipe off the water.
10/10 would recommend
![Install%20Chart%20for%20MB2000[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/5Lcl6kM.jpg "Install%20Chart%20for%20MB2000[1].jpg")
>>27914798
cheap models that take a hot water line (instead of having a heated reservoir or instant heating) are decently priced. Takes a while to purge the line of cold water, so doesn't really work well unless the model you get has a "cleaning" function to purge the cold water first.
I really miss the high end ones though
>Heated seat
>Heated water
>Active deodorization
>Water massage
>Heated drying
>Music to cover up the noise
>Push button flushing
A fucking spa for your asshole.
>>27914748
>>27914760
My bathroom.... I know the TP holder is in the most autistic place ever. Why roll is on new holder or on top of toilet.
>>27914138
Jeez, some of these are expensive. Not sure if it's worth the hassle in an apartment that I'll eventually move from
>>27914668
>Be drunk, tried, sick, or any other condition that impairs ability to balance
>Take dump
>Try to get toilet paper
>Lean over
>Fall off throne
Who the fuck decided on that placement?
Not in the bathroom but it certainly could be. It's not textured for non slip but the finger ring and wide 'blade' base make good stops
>>27915128
Just take it with you.
I am being 100% serious I've kept mine from 3 moves and will continue using it until it breaks.
I've been on the fence before for awhile, but this thread has me convinced. I'm buying a bidet.
You never know when an enemy frogman, or shark, will infiltrate your bubble bath.
>>27915277
kek
>>27914149
You should try some of the Toms from Maine stuff.
>>27915286
The fuck is going on with that mag?
>>27914019
Shit nigga how much do you poop to have a trash can full of spent rolls? Clean yo shit up.
this, and maybe eventually a glock 17 with maritime cups
>>27915364
gotta have room for the long-ass projectile
>>27914910
>Toilet plays Slayer while it cleans your asshole with a jet of warm water and deodorant.
Truly, this is the future.
>>27914762
Dude. You can get 'em for like $40 on Amazon, and the feeling of just using enough TP to tactically dry your ass off is fantastic.
Get one. Worst case, you hate it and you're out $40, boo hoo.
I grew up in a house with both an outdoor and indoor shower. We usually kept 20 gauge shotguns in the outdoor shower for snakes and stuff. Now I just have a gun in the bathroom so I can play with it while taking a shit.
>>27914910
No shit, er, figuratively. Some shit, literally.
The ones I had at mid-range Tokyo hotels generally had the heated seat, fart fan, variable temp water and an iPod dock. Truly they are light-years ahead of the USA in terms of ass technology.
ITT : Fucking amateurs
>>27915128
The fully electronic ones start at 250 from what I've found. Costco has a sale on one of the lower-mid end ones at 350 before tax. Even that is a bit to rich for my blood. Will probably just use the cold water bidet attachment for 20 bucks when on sale on amazon instead. Hopefully the hot water version of the attachment will go on sale during BF/CM.
>>27915470
While I don't condone doing it, you can "rent" at costco or homedepot. I've read people returning them and neither give a shit, as long as it's clean and looks new. Amazon constantly has returns for sale as a discount. They claim "installed, but not used". Not that it matters much, it wouldn't be any more disgusting than using a public toilet.
>>27915463
>period time for girlfriend
>smart toilet detects it
>plays Raining blood
>>27915277
You will not regret it.
>Anyone want to start a company focused on bidets with hidden weapons? TacToilet LLC? /k/rapper Inc?
>>27914138
Those fancy ones are only about a couple hundred dollars or so. I bought this one for... $20 off of Amazon a few weeks ago. I'm moving to a new place on Saturday, so I'm installing it there.
Bidets are awesome, I wish everyone had one.
>>27915515
That's... kinda gross, but whatever I guess.
Otherwise it's hard to try before you buy, really.
>>27915505
cant quick draw that shit nigga i shower with
my k-bar in my mouth and my glock between my thighs
I bought a SXP Ultimate marine defender specifically for shower defense
>>27913857
Congratulations OP.
In this thread we have,
>reasonably cheap bidet
>toothpaste flavors
>a Beretta
>famas
>rubber duck
>trash can full of expended shit ticket magazines
Literally NO ONE notices the gay porn pic in the original post!
Goddamnit, OP was actually a fag and no one noticed!!!
What the actual fuck?!?!
>>27916018
Oh, we noticed. We didn't care.
>>27915364
The spring goes in the extended bit. The whole mag doesn't need to be that big
>>27916018
nothing wrong with 'mirin a beautiful man
>>27914019
This is a perfect portrait of the life of a slavshit owner.
>>27916018
How is that a gay image? Do you not know how to appreciate the human body without becoming aroused?
>>27916018
>gay porn pic
It's a dude in a bathtub. Not sure how you can call that gay, much less porn. If it made your man bits tingle, that would be on you boss.
>>27913857
I demand sauce on this pic op.
>>27914426
>"You think someone responsible enough to have kids would have a bathroom that disgusting?"
All the proof we need than this anon has no kids.
>>27916913
Pretty much. Having kids means you cope with way more filthy shit than you normally would.
>>27916018
It's a hairy fucknut in a bathtub. If you think it's arousing... well... I hate to say it, but, perhaps you should evaluate yourself and recognize that you might have... predilections...
>>27916018
>gay porn
It's just OP asking where he should store his weapons, dumbass.
>>27917036
>Not finding that beautiful hunk of man arousing
I bet you kiss girls you faggot.
Figured I'd ask here since only phone at moment.
Sister's ex and her had a spat, he attacked her one night, couldn't prove enough in court but got restraining order. Threatened retribution vs sister and family.
Big issue is hes black, former military (don't know details, shes falling apart already), and unregistered handgun. Plus actual PTSD and currently a journalist.
What's some security stuff we can pick up that might be decent, including systems, gadgets, non lethal, or whatever. Gun not a option due to her shaking type, but definitely open up to alot of things. Will probably head out tomorrow to help her look at things. Any help is appreciated.
>>27917036
It's a professionally done photograph of a fit adult man in a bubble bath.
How absolutely astoundingly stupid are you to not guess the intent of this image's creators?
>>27917384
There's a man threatening your sister and you haven't put him in several dumpsters around town yet?
>>27917411
I could do several things at the moment but was asked not to.
>>27914225
holy literal shit.. that was good
>>27917384
Foam or gel pepper spray can be used indoor. A big flashlight. Motion light outside. Door frame reinforcement if you can install it / get it installed soon.
>>27915197
>chiclet keycaps
how do you live
>>27917448
K on suggestions. I'll give her one of my mags or get one with strobe as well. Everything else will look at, just wasn't up to date on this sort of thing when guns wasn't an option.
>>27917497
By touch typing and not being a scrub. I've got a Sculpt keyboard at work too, because it's slim, curved, and has short keypresses. Helps mitigate RSI / carpal tunnel.
>>27917504
Unfortunately multi-shot taser still barely exist or only have like 2 or 3 shots. Not much has changed in the non lethal department for a while.
>>27917401
Even if I accept your weird decree that the image is sexual or pornographic, what makes it gay? Wouldn't that depend on the target audience for the image? If the picture were meant to arouse a woman, a "pornographic" image of a lone male would be perfectly heterosexual.
As a heterosexual male I experience no sexual impulses while viewing this image.
The only way this could be gay porn would be if it were to cause the sexual arousal of a gay man.
tldr; no john u r the faggots
and then the homophobe sucked dicks
>>27917384
>black
>former military
>restraining order
>"guns are not an option"
Jesus christ it's like you want "Town of Castle Rock v. Gonzales" 2.0. A restraining order won't stop anybody, and the police can't always protect you. If you want your sister to be safe, buy her pic related, take her to the local range, and teach her how to use it well. My 13 year old brother can shoot one just like it with no problems.
>>27917613
why is that picture called sbr.jpg? Thats obviously a pistol anon. Fix yourself.
>>27913857
Guys with big, muscular thighs holy fucking shit I don't know why this is a thing for me but it is
Also, I keep a cheap Hi-Point C9 with a spare mag up in the cabinet above the toilet next to the shower. It's an after thought, I'm not going to spend too much money on something I'll (hopefully) never use
>>27917555
Its sexual, but you are correct that the hetero or homo nature of it depends on the viewer.
I'd guess it was originally gay because Im convinced that since he isnt holding several thousand dollars and the keys to a porsche thats not enough to get the average woman going.
>>27917555
Not him, but if I understand it correctly, women don't tend to look up lewd images of men. Usually when men are photographed like this, it's intended for other men. Hence the pose: If it were intended for women, the pose would probably be more dominant and masculine, less "Come over here big boy and clean me up good"
t. bisexual scum
>>27917520
>slim, curved, and short keypresses
Sounds like my ex
>>27915522
underrated
>>27917627
>>27917628
It's a dude taking a bath, still not seeing anything sexual here.
>>27914225
>tfw I could almost hear the glee in his voice as he says "Let's put it on Turbo!"
I miss Hickok... Rest in peace, Greg ;-;7
[spoiler]just kidding he's not dead haha[/spoiler]
>>27917649
I don't pose like that when I'm taking a bath
Also, in certain situations (i.e. photography with sexy people) bubble baths are inherently sexual, because you can get them naked and cover the naughty bits with the bubbles.
I usually take a harpoon with me into the bath.
Sometimes even whales on Friday nights.
>>27917674
ayyyyyyyyyy
>>27917667
that's like saying pants are inherently sexual because they cover up vaginas. You people are full of nonsense.
It's okay to be gay, guys.
Just don't, by virtue of your own gayness, ascribe other peoples' activities into the same sphere.
>>27917619
O shot nogger you're right
>>27917649
It's a buff guy intentionally sticking his ass out of the water. He's rotated so that he can show off his chest, arm, and ass. Nobody takes a bath like that. It's definitely sexual
My bathroom door locks (and is a good quality solid core door with the same locks as my exterior doors) and I have a Glock 17 in a sealed vac-bag taped under the lid of my toilet tank.
If someone's fucking around trying to get at me during suds-and-showtunes time, they'll get more than they bargained for.
>>27917710
That's assuming a lot, dude could have been looking for soap or a washcloth that had fallen into the water and then been surprised by someone taking his picture. I'm not seeing how you can insist his position couldn't have resulted from any number of contortions to either get comfortable or thoroughly clean beyond the posssibility of being surprised by someine with a camera.
I must admit I prefer showers and will only rarely soak in a tub and am therefore far from an expert though.
>>27914138
Italy master race reporting in
>>27917727
I don't quite get the logistics of starfish scrubbing with the downward pouring faucet at that height.
Do you have to get a hand involved and cup and splash water up on your turdcutter or am I missing something?
>>27917727
Eww. That's seriously like one step above Pajeet using his designated poo scraping hand in the street.
Anything less than a fully automated ass blaster means you're getting your hands way too close to a shitty asshole.
>>27917727
Euro "drinking fountain" bidets are ass. Be ashamed. Bidets should mean less work, not more.
>>27917734
you american dont clean properly your asshole under the shower? that's gross
>>27917750
"We American" have proper hands-free automatic bidets.
Have fun picking the shit out from under your fingernails after fingering yourself in your drinking fountain.
>>27914164
>not doing both
>>27917730
Ive sketched a few possibilities, 1,2 or 3?
>>27917778
forgot mspaint.
>>27917780
Go with 3
Then you can get some pushups in while you're cleaning off
>>27915286
Indeed.
>>27914138
fucking washlets, when will they learn?
>>27917765
Americans in general just swab at it with some shit tickets. Don't lie to foreigners to try to look fancy. We're fucking America, we're a bit behind in anal hygiene maybe, but fuckin moon landing, dubya dubya 2, etc.
/k/ - Toiletry & Anal Hygiene
>>27913857
I'm as hairy as him. Just wish I was as built as him
>>27913857
>I keep a 17 year old in my bathroom permanently
mooooods
>>27918203
You dont?
>>27916018
Lost it at
>reasonably cheap bidet
Both times.
Never change /k/
>>27917710
>It's a buff guy
4U
>>27917765
The vast majority of Americans are fucking terrified of bidets. People see it as either disgusting (they think the water is from the bowel or that you leave your ass wet) or think it's pussy to use water.
>>27919912
>bowel
I meant bowl.
I keep my AK in the bathroom (in the master bedroom). Mostly because if my house were to get invaded, it is our designated spot since it's the furthest back from the outside door.
Bamp for bidet.
>>27913857
I have a rusty crowbar in my bathroom.
>>27920350
Dual purpose... very nice!
>>27913857
my only defense would be my penis
most people faint when they see it for the first time
>>27918105
Start lifting bruh
