By taking upon oneself the powers of Death,
by becoming everything which it destroys, overwhelms and shatters,
one passes beyond fear and limitation.
edition
>send a girl a text at 12 last night
>it's 7:30pm and she still hasn't responded
at a fucking loss lads
good edition
having a look
>a fucking leaf
@52543452 (You) (Cross-thread)
You
saving my money
Little white cocks
First day of Christmas hols today and got up at 8am. Feels good lads.
>>52543443
you have to kill her now. so sorry.
>>52543443
she probably strummed herself off so much over your text that her fanny juice fried her phone's circuits
But whole Canada is a part of the french world and don't have a relevance to /brit/
>>52543510
mine doesnt start until 8pm tonight and even then might have to do tomorrow morning
fucking just
What happened with the Aussie who said he raped someone? Did it turn out to be a ruse?
tfw no christmas gf
>>52543538
>have been off since 18th
>back in in 29th
Have wasted every second of it
What should i wank to?
>>52543541
>Australians
>Serious posts
Pick one
>>52543557
interracial gangbang donkey dick prolapse porn
>>52543561
I believe it
>>52543557
American porn
Or as we call it, interracial gay MILF porn
going to talk to My Mother
>>52543557
slags
>>52543557
scat cuckolding
>>52543557
http://www.youporn.com/watch/11131505/horny-teen-mandy-muse-getting-fisted-and-hardcore-anal-fucked/?from=embed&utm_source=gif-src.com&utm_medium=embed&utm_campaign=embed&t=86
What's a nice place in southern England that one can resettle in, nothing big, just a comfy village of something
>>52543538
We usually always finish on the 23rd but since it falls on a Wednesday this year we finished a day earlier. They gave us the 24th as a free paid holiday which was nice.
>>52543555
Good lad, it is Christmas so you might aswell lie around watching bad tv and posting on /int
Open your eyes on Saviour's Day
Don't look back or turn away
Life can be yours if you'll only stay
He is calling you, calling you
On the Saviour's Day
>>52543581
will you be with her over Christmas?
>>52543652
cornwall
>>52543674
of course
i live with her :) x
>14 degrees on Christmas Day
>>52543661
Cliff Richard also sang Millennium Prayer. Please don't remind me
>>52543652
Hownslow
>>52543661
Thanks Cliff
watching videos of larp battles on youtube
on the one hand it does look like a lot of fun prancing about in forests n that banging away at virgins with foam swords but its just such a bent pastime and i bet they take all the fun out of it with rules
>>52543691
How can I trust that you are being serious
>>52543718
Look at the Russian ones where they actually deck out in full armour with metal weapons and knock the shit out of each other. They have ambulances on standby and everything
just set fire to a toilet paper roll and then put the fire out with my wee
>>52543747
very good lad
>>52543730
I'm British, we're inherenly trustworthy.
How about Swindon?
Okappa is very attractive by I prefer Makimaki
>>52543681
oh i thought you lived in your own place. Wish here a good morning lad.
>>52543718
LARP is fun as long as everyone takes it seriously. It's like paintball crossed with dungeons & dragons, and if you like that idea then you'll have a great time.
http://strawpoll.me/6344493
http://strawpoll.me/6344493
http://strawpoll.me/6344493
i hope this poll gets plenty of votes
if it doesn't then i'll probably post it again later so be forewarned if you see it crop up again
Fucking hell they're still fighting with the Taliban for control of Helmand, in 2015. Why are JFs so incompetent? Just get in there and sort it out you mugs.
Cold out.
>>52543770
Swindon is a completely soulless town, but it is cheap.
>>52543770
That looks better than that crap you just tried to show me.
I mean a borough of London that looks like it has a lot of brown people? Why would you do this to me?
What can you tell me about Swindon or is this just another gimmick
lads if she doesnt respond to me today ill need to text her tomorrow morning asking her if shes still on for sunday
ffs just respond to me i am a perfect person in every single way and there is no reason any woman shouldnt throw herself to my feet
>>52543811
>No
???????
>>52543830
>What can you tell me about Swindon
It's where the British version of NASA is based.
>>52543811
where is the no gf option
>>52543814
CURRENT YEAR
U
R
R
E
N
T
Y
E
A
R
really dislike my sister lads
Got the windows open to let in some fresh air. Cold now but i can hear the birds singing.
>>52543871
Better than wanting to shag your sister
>>52543851
it's hypothetical if you had a gf
btw, sneaky silent farts you think she won't notice would go under the "no" option
>>52543888
I don't answer hypothetical strawpolls
>>52543903
The strawpoll itself isn't hypothetical
>>52543915
By my gf is
>>52543844
Alright
I am looking for a comfy place where there is not much to do. All of my basic necessities met and maybe some restaurants but other than that just a quiet area. Is this possible in Swindon or anywhere else in southern england
>>52543903
but it clearly states "would you" and not "do you"
Alright, which one of you said Umaru is good? I read a few pages and it was fucking terrible. I'm glad I didn't waste my time by starting to watch the animated series.
>>52543871
Same, mines a horrible person with no morals
>>52543878
speaking from experience la?
>>52543809
despite everything it does seem fun
might have to drag my bf (best friend) into it one day
>>52543927
Look I'm not answering it okay?
>>52543923
Swindon would seem to fit the bill. You can go full countryside and live in Bracknell Forest
>>52543816
>being northern
>>52543951
answer it or i'll have a wank while thinking about your mum tonight
>>52543960
northern weather
>>52543966
You're pushing all the wrong buttons mate. Watch yourself. I'm not in the mood.
>>52543923
How rich are you? Southwest will cost a fuckload. If it were me i'd go lake district for that LotR feel. Grasmere, Ambleside, Coniston, Keswick are all great.
>>52543652
The Cotswolds aee the most peaceful part of England, except for maybe Cornwall and Devon, but the facilities in those places aren't up to scratch (bad phone signal and internet speed).
is there a difference between a girl having a crush on you and wanting to have your penis in her vagina among other things?
*scratches your itchy arsehole*
>>52543929
Anime of the year
the more i think about it the more fun it seems
/brit/ larp meetup in the brecon beacons when
im proper good with a bow not even joking id carry the lot of you
>>52544000
If she has a crush she's already flicked her bean to you a whole bunch of times.
>im proper good with a bow
thinking about buying a pair of sunglasses because i want to be the kind of person who wears sunglasses
>>52543955
Well thanks I will search those up on Google Earth and whatnot
>>52543994
Not very. If it's costly I would look somewhere else, but I will come into a lot of money in the future
>>52544010
It's gathering momentum again in the irc and insta, could be pretty soon
>>52544027
>flicked her bean
please don't use this expression it disgusts me
>>52544027
>implying women masturbate
Lads I've been shagging my housemate but she's becoming really clingy and she wants to start going out on dates. She's mental, what do?
*steps into christmas*
>>52544075
That sounds an awful lot like you're problem, not ours
>>52544027
do women masturbate to thoughts of people they know/like? i mean i've only ever masturbated to porn and occasionally womens weekly magazines during hard times. never had a wank to someone i know
>>52544027
>whole bunch
fuck off yank
>>52544054
You'd rather she jam her clam, punt her cunt or shammy her fanny?
>>52544075
wow i really feel for you and your normie problems mate fucking hell i hope you make it through this dark time peace be with you
fuck me lads
http://i.4cdn.org/f/Banned%20Simpsond%20opening.swf
gonna have to lie down after this one
>>52543998
I have heard of the cotswolds it looks very nice there, but i hear housing is expensive
>>52544075
hmm, have you tried fucking off normie twat?
>>52544075
ur fucked m8. don't shit where you eat
>>52544075
FONT
>>52544124
I can fap to this
>>52544075
kill her
>>52544075
Its going to be hard no matter what you do. Go and stay with your family a few days over Christmas to get away from her.
>>52544116
>>52544099
>>52544145
Cheers lads
>>52544131
Yeah very expensive, but there's hardly any crime there and no pakis or blacks
>>52544178
it proper fucked me up
when homer reached for the phone and had his hand chopped up it really fucked with me. I've seen loads of gore videos and stuff, I think the only reason it effected me so much was because simpsons is something I've watched since I was young.
>>52544059
>>52544107
Of course they do, women are people. Anyone that says they don't give it a tug from time to time is lying.
Have you welcomed the love of the Lord Harold Kane into your life?
Scarlet Johanssen was a bad choice for the voice of the robot gf in Her
Link me a story where the mc swaps bodies with/is transformed into a Polish whore lads
>women are people
anyone got the wojack with the crying eyes and snot coming out?
>>52544233
>women are people
uh-huh
>>52544212
Is that a ruse to keep the pakis and blacks out?
>>52544276
nah mate sorry
oh no wait here it is haha
>>52544232
Yeah it's very effectively done desu, it's what you've said plus the fact that the characters are all silent, so your mind fills in the blanks. The gore is very graphic too. It actually made me laugh when Lisa got shot at the end though.
>>52544301
ahahaha not quite the one cause it doesnt have the snot but she'll have to do
>>52544305
ah right, you meant this one
>>52544235
Yes actually. But I'm tempted by Vardyology.
>>52544301
>>52544317
do you know what snot is
>last message she sent was at 12:23am
>i send message at 12:27am
>it is now 8:12pm
>she has yet to respond
FUYCK9NG HELL JUST RESPOND YOU FUCKING HARPY REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>52544249
lads pls
>>52544305
>>52544317
welp, looks like wojak found a box of tissues! hahahaha!
>>52544285
Probably
>>52544107
yes
I've even had an angry masturbation session over somebody I hated that was hot. Fantasized about choking him, calling him names and spitting in his face while being on top.
please respond so i dont have to go to sleep like this ffs lass dont make me text you tomorrow with a double message treat me like a HUMAN
>>52544304
im never watching it again
>>52544324
yeah i just looked at the thumbnail and thought it was the one but apparently not
just hush up man i'm trying to play it cool here
corbyn desu
>>52544367
>just hush up man
Excuse me? Are you talking to me? Show some fucking respect.
>>52544353
be my bf
>>52544353
>him
lads i asked her if she wanted to go out sunday last time we went on a date and she said she fucking did does she expect me to message her tomorrow asking her if its s till on becauise i will
>>52544365
*tucks you in then kisses you on the forehead*
>>52544187
Yeah that's what I'm doing
>Excuse me? Are you talking to me? Show some fucking respect.
doing a drive
only so much sad music i can listen to boys
>>52544320
They are both aspects of the same divine being
>>52544472
>>52544472
heck
>>52544472
>>52544472
>Ozzie banter
>>52544472
lmao you should have cut her throat and left her to bleed XD
On my way home from Dublin now
>>52544472
Australia at it again
in hospital lads :(
>>52544472
that's pretty hot ngl
I like the humiliation aspect of it.
>>52544544
>tumblr
>>52544472
that's not falco
>>52544472
quality banter
having my wank for the day early
>>52544472
Did she take it seriously, or did you explain it was just banter?
>christmas music
pennjiletteputtingrubbishinthebin.gif
can someone explain to me why i should bother helping others
was phoning the van men and I woke them all up hehehehe-
>>52544472
is my gf high or low test?
>>52544656
Because Jesus taught that through good works you can earn salvation in the kingdom of Heaven
got 11 (You)s (and counting) on a single post today lads
I'll definitely enter that in my diary
>>52544666
How are they still alive?
>>52544666
Checked m8
>>52544675
sounds good but i don't really believe that kind of stuff
>Order some shit online Friday
>Next day delivery
>It's now wednesday
>>52544688
link me so i can give u another you
>>52544688
G'day cunt that's not all, stay where you are. We'll come to you.
>>52544698
PIn your hopes on tomorrow.
>>52544698
The customs confiscated your fleshlights.
>>52544423
Don't be clingy lad
Go to bed then text her when she texts back
>>52544698
i ordered some shit from brisbane today and i live in brisbane so hopefully it'll be here tomorrow but probably not let's face it and then not friday because it's christmas and all the normies have to go eat ham with their filthy normie families and then not on saturday or sunday because there's no post on the weekend so i probably won't have it until monday
why does life have to be so hard right
>>52544741
what if she never texts back
>>52544675
So quid pro quo work then? God's just a blackmailer desu
>Tfw you will never live in a log cabin in the Alaskan wilderness
Im going to kill myself
Just got paid lads.
>>52544782
Doubt it would be that great once you get there desu
>>52544790
shout your mates a line of coke and a prozzy each
>>52544751
She will if you made plans
If she doesn't text you by tomorrow night then text her with some bs (how was ur day, etc.)
>>52544751
i'd say go for it, she might be one of those people that says "we should get together soon" but doesn't instigate anything
>>52544790
fuck off billionare
>>52544790
>mfw payday
>>52544790
Which one am I supposed to look at?
>>52544803
Yes it would
>>52544721
it was the one about raping a girl and then cutting off her hair which didn't actually happen and is actually just tonight's wank fantasy but i don't have to worry about that because we're not living in an orwellian police state where you can be arrested just for making up stories on the internet
holy crap we posted at the exact same time
gonna turn the computer off now lads, see you at 6ish have a good day :-) x
>>52544848
you forgot your 'haha' at the end lad
you did mean to put one there right haha
do u reckon the santas at shopping centers are paedos that get a stiffy every time a kid sits on their lap?
teeny white willy
>Number plate just arrived
>Still waiting for the bracket to mount it on the car
>Hasn't arrived yet despite getting next day delivery and ordering Friday
>Need to go Christmas shopping
>Can't drive car
>>52544782
I could import you here but we'd have to pretend to be a couple
>>52544933
No dont be lewd
>>52544887
have a good day gaylord
yeah alright so battle plan lads if she doesn't text tonight i'll text her tomorrow inquiring about sunday and if she doesn't respond to that, well then:
1. rude
2. utterly crushed
>>52544941
double sided tape 2bh it'll leave a sticky mess on your bumper when you get the bracket but the bracket will cover it
double sided tape will hold it on i've seen plenty do it
brendan fraser
FUUUUUCKING CUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
KUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
KAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNT
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK OFFFFFFFFFFF YAAAAAAAAAAAA KAAAAAAAAAAARNTTTTTTTTTTTT
>>52544950
Fuck off faggot im getting there by my own means
>>52544910
no i didn't, this is no laughing matter
did you not hear about that yank kid who went to prison for 8 years for "threatening to shoot up a school" in a very obviously joking way
anyway gonna stop now before they try and charge me with dissent and conspiracy
Spending Christmas with my Polish gf and her family lads.
Ask me anything.
>>52545000
fantastic
>>52545035
Why couldn't you find love among your own people?
>>52544967
Tomorrow night*
Also if you regularly text small-talk with her just do more of that instead of inquiring
>>52545058
Brit girls are slags lad, the question is why would you want to?
>>52545003
there is a person behind the post, be kind to people.
>>52545072
>Also if you regularly text small-talk with her just do more of that instead of inquiring
what would the reason behind that be?
>>52545021
haha
>>52544075
1. Don't shit where you eat
2. Don't put your knob in crazy
2 cardinal rules lad, you broke both
>>52545058
I couldn't stand the extreme fatness of British slags.
>>52545095
Don't want to look clingy, Sunday's a long way off
>>52545058
Poles are qts, might try my luck with one that I knew back in hs while I'm back for the holidays 2bh
>>52545124
why aren't you spending christmas with your own family?
>>52545133
but going from small talk to small talk cant be too good, right? also tomorrow's thursday for me btw
Hey Mr Churchill
Comes over here
To say we're doing splendidly
But it's very cold
Out here in the snow
Marching to and from the enemy
Oh I say it's tough
I have had enough
Can you stop the cavalry?
I have had to fight
Almost every night
Down throughout these centuries
That is when I say
Oh yes, yet again
Can you stop the cavalry?
>>52545035
report back on what carp tastes like love
>>52545156
>going from small talk to small talk
What?
>tomorrow's thursday
Still too far off, just wish her a Merry Christmas tomorrow night.
The copper said I had 2 weeks to get my number plate fixed before he's flagging the car to be pulled over.
So I assume he means I can drive it on the road with no front plate for those 2 weeks and it will be fine?
If that wasn't fine he wouldn't have given me an ultimatum, he would have told me not to drive it until it's fixed. And if it was parked on my drive way it wouldn't need to be road legal so an ultimatum to make it road legal wouldn't make sense.
>>52545135
Because I was invited here and wanted to try something new. Also I'm considering proposing to my gf at some point so meeting her family is good.
Would recommend so far, although the big day is tomorrow.
>>52545200
>What?
we weren't exactly engaging in a biting battle of the minds last time we talked
>>52545218
Wouldn't rely on the beneficence of some random bobby. Fix your fucking car
>>52544941
So just stick it on the dashboard/rear window
Van drivers so it all the time
>>52545228
Then just continue the small talk but hold off until she texts you back first or tomorrow night ffs what's so hard to understand lad?
>>52545250
The bracket needs to come in the post like now.
I need to drive 40 miles to my families house for Christmas tomorrow.
>>52545272
>ffs what's so hard to understand lad?
why the FUCK she hasn't responded to me today
>>52545283
You do so at your own risk, if he hasn't flagged your car as safe then any copper is going to take your car
Might be able to move away from Brum soon lads
>This melt and his fucking bracket
>>52545290
She probably went to bed you knob
>>52545345
what? for the entire day?
>>52545363
Maybe she has depression
>>52545366
nah she had to buy christmas presents today
*banterhands*
>>52545363
>>52545391
Well then she was busy
Maybe she forgot to text back
Maybe the carriers fucked up and she didn't get your message
Just ask her how her present shopping went
>>52545290
i've already given you an explanation lad stop having a sook
>>52543522
>>52545462
what? tomorrow night? a full day after she went present shopping? mate you are a renegade if you think that'll go down smooth
>>52545035
My Polish gf went back to Poland for a month ;_;
Just done a wank in the toilet at work
AMA
>>52545494
did you summon the wanky shit demon?
>>52545488
Fine, ring her and angrily scream down the phone demanding an explanation for why she felt it was acceptable to ignore you, and then threaten her family if she ever does it again.
what do you want from us?
>>52545345
Vocaroo when
"""work"""
lmao what will the normies think of next?
>>52545492
she's going to get her klunge stretched out by several bullet headed Polish men
>this melt and his fucking texts
Lads what do I get me mam for christmas? Going shopping now. I dunno what girls like.
Usually go to the body shop and get one of their gift sets but I want to spend at least £100. So I could get her a £50 gift set and something else, but dunno what.
>>52545488
I meant tonight
Just text her rn ffs
>>52545594
are you serious lad? reckon i should? fuck alright
>>52545586
Get her an hour with a black male escort. Costs 100 quid and she'll be so much more grateful
>>52545586
what are her hobbies? what does she do with her free time?
>>52545541
Only in your dirty mind, cuckforbrains
How do I trick a girl into thinking I'm a nice guy lads?
having a survive
>>52545586
kindle?
>>52545634
GOOD POST
>>52545519
what
>>52545586
get her a nice handbag or pair of shoes
some cute heels with a matching dress would work too
>>52545608
JUST
do it
>>52545638
>women
>hobbies
>>52545634
great post lad
>>52545705
i literally did but not if i ask if she wants go out sunday that'll be a 3 message streak! i've never done that before! fucking hell what could she be doing
>>52545705
I know you're a girl, I just want confirmation
>this melt and his gimmick
having a smoke
plot twist: i'm not a smoker
>>52545519
can you sing
willies willies, I like willies
