>Going to the gym and working out has become the only thing I look forward to. The only thing that makes me happy now. Probably the only reason why I haven't killed myself yet, I'd probably have been dead by now if I hadn't started working out.
I'm 19, started working out at 15 years old when I was a chubby piece of shit with no muscles. Now I'm just a piece of shit with muscles and much less fat. I got addicted to the gym. The feeling of being sore after an amazing workout got me hooked. It made the pain go away.
The last 4 years have basically been:
>stressed out at school? Go to the gym.
>dealing with bullshit from friends/teachers/family members/coworkers? Go to the gym.
>feel lonely because I haven't had a girlfriend yet? Go to the gym.
>feeling sad about something? Anything? Go to the gym.
>Bored? Go to the gym.
Its fucked up because when I'm not at the gym all I can think of is going back, training more, getting better because I'm still very insecure with my body, I still have the same mentality as my 14 year old out of shape self. When I'm not working out all I feel is...empty.
Does nobody feel this feel?
>>37223370
well what did you do before?
>play mmos
>play games
at least you are doing something positive now, no?
it's a very good "addiction" to have anon.
>be 30
>virgin
>never had gf
>mental issues for days
>working out is one of the few things that helps me stop thinking about death
>is hopeless
>will continue to lift until death
>>37223741
Yeah, I would basically just spend hours on Xbox Live playing single player and multiplayer games. But back then I was much happier overall. I may be in better shape now but there's not a lot I care about.
>>37223370
>>37223728
>>37223762
We're all gonna make it anons
>>37223837
the more fit you get, the more you will like yourself
keep training
>>37223762
Its ironic, the reason I started working out was because I knew I was fat, and I wanted a girlfriend. I thought getting fit = getting a girlfriend. About a year and a half later I realized lifting for girls wasn't my motivation and it wouldn't fix my loneliness. It did help with loneliness though, but I've accepted that I won't get a girlfriend, I'm too much of a piece of shit to be in a relationship with. Lifting the pain away helps.
>>37223837
It's because you're on step 5 or 6 of 100 of improving yourself and you see the road ahead and how far you've fallen. When you're at the bottom it's easy to forget about the climb back up and you can delude yourself about how far down you are.
>>37223370
Jump on some local meetups, make some friends, and work your way upvto some online dating. It'll make for a happier life in the long run I swear.
You are Michelangelo. Everyday your chisel strikes the marble, a bit of limestone falls, and you blow the sand away to made due for another day. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, you are building your mark into of the very vessel that propels you to do so.
Perhaps that little chisel is all you've got, Anon. Maybe your life is shitty and you don't have anyone. Maybe the only thing that plants your feet down in the morning is knowing that after all the bullshit, you sand your hands, hammer in your hand, and give one perfect thrust of ignition into the marble.
Nobody gave two shits about that rock Anon. It was a pathetic and weak collection of atoms with no purpose. You can make it beautiful. You can make something ugly beautiful. If you don't think thats worth living for Anon, you're right. Kill yourself.
But if you agree, then build it. Build David. Make art for arts sake. And when you die, when the sands have eroded your sculpture, when your masterpiece is ready to return to the earth that birthed it, you will die knowing that you made the world more perfect.
