Hey /fit/, newfag over here. Lemme introduce myself.
I am one of those /b/tards that occasionally visit 4chan to search for webm porn. I'll be honest, I never really liked /fit/ in the first place, but now that I think about it there are quite some respectable individuals here.
I'll get straight to the point, I'm tired of fapping myself to sleep when there are so many cute girls out there I could be fucking, and I want to do them. So my question to /fit/ is, how many of you had actually started working out toward the goal to fuck girls eventually? What kept/keeps you going? How feasible do you think this whole silly thing is, as in do you think that stupid motivation would be enough to keep me going? (I've attempted a workout regimen several times over the course of 5-7 years, each lasted several months, all to some goal like "better my health overall", "to live healthily" but could be stick to it perhaps because the goal was too general and did not carry enough motivation, so this time I'm being perfectly honest and very specific and hoping it would be different.)
I'm a 23yo straight male and still a virgin, by the way. This sounds delusional AF but I really want to try and change myself for real this time.
>pic related, it was me but I've stopped being so edgy
Any and all advices/tips are appreciated. Even calling me a fucktard faggot is okay so long as you can wake me up if I'm being too delusional of a faggot. Thank you kindly.
>>36816543
lifting weights doesn't fix autism frendo
>>36816551
I'm aware of my autism, thanks anon. What can I do about it though, so I've decided to do this instead.
>>36816543
>>"Even calling me a fucktard faggot"
Lost cause.
>>36816543
Eat healthy, be social and get friends. Exercise doesn't fix autismo
>>36816578
You're giving up on my too soon, anon. Even I cringe real hard reading what I wrote but not like I can help it, and if you're referring to the language it's not my native language.
>do you think that stupid motivation would be enough to keep me going?
It might, it's an individual thing - I would say working out will become an end in itself once you start it (endorphins, seeing your strength increasing) then I read you said you tried that already. Maybe you were approaching it with too light weight or not enough volume. It should be rewarding of itself, and then you stick with it long enough to see the added muscle and it's even more rewarding, then you see the social reaction and even more etc.
>>36816567
Honestly only use /fit/ for fitness advice, and even take that with a grain of salt.
Do not come here expecting anything good in terms of life or relationship advice.
Even the fitness advice is shoddy, you really should only take the sticky, /plg/. /owg/, /rtg/, and /qtddtot/ seriously
>>36816597
I'm doing all that, feeling pressured enough but I'm trying. One thing I'm particularly proud of is I've at least been sticking to cycling to work the past few months instead of driving my motorbike (cars are not really a thing over here), and I currently work in a sort-of-retails environment and have been for one year and a half so the social aspect has been better than who I was, say, 3-4 years ago, though that's not saying anything of how sociable I actually am, just enough that I'm not completely socially retarded.
>>36816612
Thank you anon, first one to address the real question here. I want to hear a bit more of your personal experience on this though, granted if you actually have had something similar in the past.
>>36816638
Yes of course, I came here with that in mind. It's the first question I asked and that's what I really want to know and maybe learn a bit about people's personal stories if they have them. Perhaps I've said a little too much but I just wanted to provide some context is all.
I won't lie, I started lifting for grills. Then I got a gf and stopped lifting. Then I dumped her and realized how shitty I looked and felt, and started lifting for myself.
The thing is OP, you can have whatever fucking reason you want for getting /fit/, as long as you realize that eventually your motivation must come from within yourself. This might sound unrealistic to you now, but more than likely, if you start exercising to try and get grills, you'll likely learn over a few months that there are a million other reasons to keep exercising.
What I'm getting at is this: use whatever you can as motivation to get off your ass now, and after awhile, assuming you've found something you halfway enjoy doing, you'll begin to realize that you want to be /fit/ for so many other reasons than trying to get laid. It comes naturally, again assuming you've found a training regimen that you can have fun doing.
We're all gonna make it breh, I believe in you OP, it's time to get off your ass and become a sick kunt.
>>36816543
Lifting will improve your life a lot, but it is not a magic cure-it-all. First, you need to change your life and mindset. Pic related.
>>36816703
Thank you so much – finally some real insights over here.
>>36816703
>>36816721
>motivation
>mindset
I actually am aware of that, but my motivation and mindset were never built upon real life experience but some vage simple idealistic ideas, so they could never help me. Hopefully eventually I can evolve them to something like the both of you have mentioned, but right now I just feel like I need some specific goal, no matter how stupid to get the momentum going.
By the way
>>36816703
I'm really interested in that part about how you started lifting for grulls. Would you mind telling me more about that? And what changed and how?
>>36816721
Pic saved
>>36816543
READ THE STICKY
1st CUT completely the shitty food (soda, candys)
2nd change your food intake to a healthy (or mostly healthy) one
3rd find a lifting/cardio routine that fits your schedule and commit to it (be minimalist at first. goal is to stick to it in the long term)
4th get proper rest
the name of the game is to build positive good habits that can be mantained in the long run, boosting confidence and self pride over time.
That's what fitness can do to help you. The rest must be seeked somewhere else, but it's a great start.
>>36816543
Where do you live OP?
I also started lifting for the grills. However I'm still not attractive to the ladies. HOWEVER, my confidence has been heightened dramatically and I can talk to some girls now.
Confidence= pussay
I used to be shy when talking to girl, but after i went to the millitary i met a lot of girls and just started taliking to them they're people too man. Just dont talk about autist things. a lot of my friends say they want a girl to hang out and play video games. To you want a friend or a gf? Decide man.
>>36816847
Thank you so much.
I hope you don't mind me asking the specifics, since you've already gone through the trouble to help:
- I've cut back on sugar in my diet, never liked sweets and now I have stopped drinking soda/sugared water of any kind.
- On the diet part, my cooking is shit so I don't cook much but I'll try to eat as much homecooking as I can from now.
Here's the questions though:
- Regarding "minimalistic schedule", how minimalist are we talking? Does 30 min of cycling every day count? Add lifting 2-3 days a week on top of that and do you think that should be enough?
- How much rest is proper rest? I've had this habit of losing track and just completely stop working out when I took several short breaks and just sort of lose the motivation to work out (which was why I could never stick to it for more than a few months, as mentioned in OP), so I don't want to rest too much here. How much rest is just enough?
>>36816543
this really you? kek
>>36816884
>where I live
I've kinda left out that part because I felt I wouldn't gather much empathy if people knew I wasn't some white man. But now that you asked, I'll be honest: I am from Asia, and what you folks on here would normally call a Chinaman, yes, small penis and all.
It's interesting that you also started lifting for pussays. Would you mind sharing more? How long has it been since you started working out based purely on this goal? How fit are you and how confident are we talking? I hope you don't mind me asking.
>>36816946
'Course not, but that's what I would picture my mental self a few years back. Yes I was a giant faggot... I still am but hey, at least not as much of an autistic faggot as before.
>>36816888
Yo, nice trips.
I actually have some female friends (being the beta faggot that I am it's only natural) but none I'd wanna fuck, just hang out with. What I want now is simply to get laid, simple as that. A gf would be nice, though.
>>36816543
Weightlifting is something that helps you get into a routine, doing something that you don't necessarily like at first.
At first it sucks, then you push through the first wall, and keep lifting. Eventually, you learn to like lifting and you get fitter/bigger. Same with girls in some respects. You put yourself out there. You fail, you're autistic, it sucks. But you push through. Keep trying to talk to girls, at the bar, at work, wherever, it's all practice. Eventually, you'll get through and start talking smoothly and getting dates. Then you fuck, and so on.
You're failing at the first wall every time, probably because you've got a shitty goal. My first successful goal was "Cut down to 155lbs". Specific, measurable, and attainable within 3 months. Do something like a goal of benching 1 plate, or squatting 2 plates, or losing 10 lbs. Something that's possible in 2-3 months, and go from there.
With respect to girls, do something similar. Try to do an activity with friends once a week. Whatever it is, as long as it's not video games, that's fine. Eventually, try to go to bars/other hangouts once a week. And so on. Set a goal of, say, 10 attempts at talking to a girl (that you don't know) in a month. And take it from there.
Hope that helps.
>>36816926
no soda and sugary things is good start, keep cooking and eventually you'll learn what works together and what doesn't. keep eating clean, lot of greens and lean meats.
start lifting 3 days a week, starting strength with added accessories is optimal for beginners, 45-60 minutes of cardio on days you don't lift
and don't lift for grills, lift and better yourself for yourself, go out and meet people to get them social gains as well, that's more important than good looks mate.
>>36816926
>- I've cut back on sugar in my diet, never liked sweets and now I have stopped drinking soda/sugared water of any kind.
that's great.
next step is to cut alcohol if you drink heavy daily (a lot of empty calories) and fast carbs (like bread and stuff)
>my cooking is shit so I don't cook much but I'll try to eat as much homecooking as I can from now.
tuna cans, scrambled/boiled eggs, chicken on a pan with oil and lemon juice, non cooked green veggies, nuts,,,
and smoothies: fruit, milk, oats. If you ain't got time just get a blender and drink that stuff.
>"minimalistic schedule
lift 3 times a week.
Or 2 times a week and have 2 high intensity cardio days too.
What I'm talking about is not to jump on long as fuark routines that takes you 2 hours to end. Find something short and straightforward like SS, SL or GSLP and commit to it.
The most important thing is to build up the habit. And you won't do it on an endless workout. Step out of the gym wanting to do more and looking forward to the next session.
>How much rest is proper rest?
I was talking about recovery. Having a good night sleep so you have energy through the day.
But since you bring up the rest during the workout, my shot on the matter is to catch your breath up and restart as soon as you feel you can do the next set.
>>36816543
Follow the starting strength routine and drink a gallon of milk a day.
>>36817151
if you're a cunt and you know it, clap your hands
>yes, you're a cunt
>>36817044
Hey, thank you. You definitely helped.
>failing at the first wall
Yes of course, how could I not see this. I thought I was being specific with my goals but turns out it's not like that, you've just opened my eyes. Your example was a good one, specific and down to the details. I'll definitely keep this in mind and learn from this.
>something similar with girls
I don't know how girls work at all, but this sounds legit. If I go by what you said, it's "practice makes perfect" again, which makes sense but I've really put it into practice because I never had clear examples. You have me some insight and some nice motivation there, props to you. I'll try doing this right after I've accomplished my first specific gym goal, because heck why not it doesn't hurt to try and I got to hear it from someone with first-hand experience. Thank you again anon.
>>36817100
Thank you anon, you've been really helpful.
>>36817063
Thanks a lot, kind anon!
>>36816789
Well when I started lifting, I did it because I was tired of being lonely all the fucking time. I've never been bad with women, but I've had some long stretches of being single that would get me feeling pretty down on myself. So I decided if I wanted to get girls I'd have to lose some weight. A big part of it was being rejected by my oneitis, and knowing that it was mostly because I was a fatfuck and she is into athletic guys.
So I started lifting, got over my old oneitis and found a new one. She rejected me once, for the same reason, and that was the last straw. At that point I got really serious about my diet and weight started falling off. Then I began looking in the mirror and feeling less and less disgusted by myself. After a few months I realized that if I got the girl by getting fit, that would be cool, but if I didn't get the girl I had to continue for myself. Now I'm getting the girl, and that's great, but looking back on pics of myself before I started lifting, I've realized that I NEVER want to look like that again. And not because I know it hurts my chances with grills, but because I hate looking in the mirror and feeling grossed out by my fat lumpy body.
It's hard to explain accurately, and the motivation change isn't something that happens over night, it's one of those things that you just have to learn through experience.
It will come to you if you put in the work, but it might be a long bumpy road.
>>36816964
On the left I'm 19 and 136lbs. I started lifting when I turned 20. On the right I'm 21 and 165lbs. That's one year of hitting the gym consistently.
You don't need to hurt yourself. Just work hard and you have to really want it. I sacrificed painting and drawing and guitar all so I could go to the gym 5-6 days a week. It's hard but it pays off
Clearly I'm still a skinnyfag but I'm 2x more confident speaking to girls
>>36817151
Don't do this
>>36817519
Thank you anon for sharing, I really appreciate that. And this is definitely what I needed to hear. We're all in this together anon, and while I can't quite picture it because as you said it's something I'll just have to learn through experience, you've given me a general idea that I think is definitely gonna be very helpful.
>>36817530
Nice tattoos you fuckin idiot
>>36817530
That's quite the change there. You're a lot similar to me in that we both belong in the lean/skinny body type (well at least you did belong in that category) so this was really reassuring to know.
Okay fuck, I just noticed that we both have small tattoos. We're so similar I could call you a bro, except you did what I couldn't: stick to training and get fit. Funny how I'm older but I'm aspiring to be like you mate.
>>36817565
Haha, I won't.
>>36817660
Hey don't be so harsh, I've got stupid tattoos, too.
>>36817720
It's a long hard road. The first 6 months is all learning and developing form, after that, the gains will come. Oh, they will come.
>>36817780
I believe you. Thanks, based anon.
>>36816638
this is some quality advice right here
>>36816543
tl;dr
read the sticky
no one cares about helping some faggot from /b/
no one cares about your life story.
>>36817831
Definitely. Everything on here was a nice learning experience.
>>36817855
Say what you want but I definitely got a ton of help from others on here, and I truly appreciate that.
Again, thank you all kind anons who contributed in the thread. (Sappy af I know but I've not felt this grateful in a long while). I've gotta go now, y'all have a nice day!
>>36817908
I just get the impression you have the wrong attitude
>Tried to lift before and failed
>Blames not having a good motivator instead of himself.
>Doesn't realise getting fit in itself should be all the motivation you need
>Wants to get fit with the minimal amount of effort
>Thinks girls will be good motivation to lift
I want you to prove me wrong
>>36817620
Well I'm glad I could help. You're taking the right steps so far, and we all have a lot of potential. I have no doubt that you'll find some strong intrinsic motivation, whether that happens soon or years down the road doesn't matter. Fake it til you make it anon, and never give up. Progress might be slow, but a baby step in the right direction is miles compared to heading an inch in the wrong direction.
Good luck anon, I hope things go as well for you as they have for me.
>>36816543
nice blog post nigger
>I am one of those /b/tards that occasionally visit 4chan to search for webm porn
yeah it shows
read the sticky, realize you're not going to make it and then kill yourself
