>tfw my run is ruined every time because I always stop to stroke cats in the street
>>36486329
wtf don't they run away from you (no offense)
>cats always shy away from me
>>36486344
>no offense
aw :3
>>36486344
>>36486353
How do animals choose who to run away from and who to approach?
Mine get cut short because 10-15minutes in I always have to take a giant shit. I should probably start doing jumping jacks before running until my bowels are empty.
>>36486429
pajeet
>>36486427
probably smell or posture or dick size
>>36486518
Do animals like big dicks
>>36486576
Your mom does if that counts.
>tfw pussy actively runs away at the sight of me
>>36486329
Closests to pussy you will ever get.
running will not make you healthy. All you're doing is making yourself hungry so you'll eat more later. eating a low fat, low sugar diet, and walking every day, is the key to health.
>run is interrupted when I talk to a group of horses at the half whey point
I know that feel, anon.
>>36486616
Some people don't run to lose weight
>>36486329
You know the hardest part about liking cats? Telling your parents that you're gay.
>>36486631
I like all animals
I'm OP and I have 2 Great Danes
>>36486604
REKT
E
K
T
>>36486640
What's the best animal?
>>36486616
>so you'll eat more later
well, you weak willed faggot, trick is to not eat more later.
>>36486651
frogs and mice
>>36486616
>le cardio is bad maymay
enjoy not living past 60 and having a bpm higher than 50.
>>36486445
Kek
![rhodesian-ridgeback5[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/HQ1TP7I.jpg "rhodesian-ridgeback5[1].jpg")
>>36486651
Rhodesian Ridgeback
>>36486686
When I was a boy I was obsessed with frogs. I thought they were the ultimate animal. I have a ton of statues of them in my loft.
>the overwhelming majesty and beauty known as a sunset captivated me as as the heavens looked like cotton candy was exploding in the sky
Has anything truly beautiful ever interrupted your workout brehs?
I saw a deer giving birth when I was running once.
i used to be beta and have my grandma drive me around
now im alpha as fuck and when i drive her to bridge, all of her friends compliment me on how i have filled out and become very handsome
often i will go to the beach or the zoo and once when i was looking at the zebras there was a nice lady who asked me if i was from that area and if i came to the zoo often i think that she was interested in me but i told her i had to go to the bathroom. i didnt go to the bathroom i went to the kiosk and bought a frozen coke and then went to the monkey enclosure because that is my favourite
i think my brother harold is the most beta person i know often he will talk to the homeless man at the bus shelter just so that he has someone to talk to i think that he needs to make some more friends. often i invite him to come drive gran to bridge with me so that he can meet my grandmas older bridge lady friends but he is afraid of being the passenger in cars because he doesnt like how the seat feels on the back of his knees i think that he needs to listen to my mother who tells him that he should wear a thicker pair of pants when he rides in the car but he wont listen. he is the most beta
>>36486706
nigga are you me?
>>36486713
I think I saw a girl being raped once
>>36486616
Cardio does make you healthy.
Op stopping to pet cats is better than a dog playfully taking a bit into your thigh
>>36486591
fucking rekt
>>36486726
Is this a pasta?
>>36486726
>>36486726
>>36486713
sunsets are the only reason why i smoke desu, also listen to some shiro sagisu bachs while smoking and watching the sun set for maximum melancholy
>>36486329
>tfw everytime I cycle through the school grounds I have to stop and molest at least one of them
Fucking sexy kids, stop being so sexy
>>36486710
so was i desu. frogs are the shit.
i always thought they had a hard time in nature though, something's always picking on them
>>36486329
this thread makes me want pets in my gym
>>36486710
>>36486886
I used to catch frogs in my garden with my hands
Always let them go though
>tfw can't even kill mosquito's because I'll feel guilty
>>36486910
the worst thing happened to me last night - i was out walking barefoot in my garden in the dark, and 3 steps before my back door i felt my foot slidder over the back of a frog. poor thing exploded.
>>36486427
You probably seem stressed anon, with dogs at least you just have to be chill
>>36486706
>>36486733
MY FUCKING NIGGAS
>>36486957
Jesus Christ
My night's ruined if I accidentally step on a snail
>>36486957
RIP
>>36486329
That's the face I made when I didn't see the word "cats" the first read through.
>tfw shitty hours
>get home at 5pm everyday
>no time for pets
>don't know whether to choose guns or a cute puppy, preferably a blue-heeler
>i'm going with the funs, adult life takes away from having a friend
>tfw usually run at about 11PM
>occasionally get people who start running away as I run up behind them thinking I'm about to fuck them up
>>36486329
>>36487022
Nigga I would freak
I've considered getting a expandable baton or some shit when running at night
>>36487005
haha.
im a cat/dog loving person
im not sure how to greentext
>>36486329
Who the fuck refers to petting animals as "stroking the cats"
>>36486726
this reads like a passage from the beginning/end of flowers for algernon
>>36487088
Everyone?
Who says 'petting'
>>36486726
pls be pasta
>>36487088
what is context?
>>36487142
Exactly, you pet animals, you don't stroke them.
But it's fine to stroke a cat
>>36486726
brilliant
>>36487168
I stroke animals, stroke their fur
Isn't petting lightly tapping them
>>36487088
Who the fuck refers to choking the chicken as "petting animals"
>>36487178
That might also be true, I guess you pet a dog and stroke a cat
>>36487193
No I stroke my dogs
>>36487200
Are they long haired?
>>36486726
this has to be pasta
>>36487253
It is
>>36486726
All this time and I had no idea the feels guy was a real person.
>work out at home
>get on floor for pushups
>dogs think it's time to play
>lock them out
>they spend the rest of the day needing reassurance that I don't hate them
>>36487310
My cat runs under me every time I'm pushing up. He makes sure I feel the burn and never half rep.
>>36486429
drink a cup of coffee before hand.
if you use sugar or flavored creamers use sugar free sweeteners or you'll get a bad sugar rush on your run.
>>36486651
your mom
>>36487216
Buzzcut
>>36487372
fugg :DD
>>36487189
>>36487428
>your dog has a buzzcut
what?
this thread made me the happiest ive been in so long
im crying laughing
>>36487067
>aoisnto mm
>asotnapst
just type > and enter between sentences
>>36486616
I REALLY LIKE THIS MEME
>>36489370
please stop
this thread
the laughter wont stop
>>36486726
>>36486710
>obsessed with frogs
>>36486726
>>36486710
>ultimate animal
i'm losing my shit over here
don't change
what the fuck is going on in this thread
>>36487178
Patting is lightly tapping them, petti g is running your hand across them.
>>36489541
>>36489458
>>36489434
There's literally nothing unusual about this thread
>>36486713
THE WORLD IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL FAMPIE
Sunrises and sunsets just splash the world with color, they're truly beautiful senpai. I like to look at the few stars still visible in the city before hitting the gym at night, really nice feels.
![[Shintani]_Hidamari_Sketch_-_06_[B99A1145].avi_snapshot_10.33_[2015.04.17_16.37.46].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/LsoXc6Q.jpg "[Shintani]_Hidamari_Sketch_-_06_[B99A1145].avi_snapshot_10.33_[2015.04.17_16.37.46].jpg")
>>36486710
>I have a ton of statues of them in my loft
Fucking kek
>>36489560
sometimes when u get in a certain good mood u can find things funny that other people wont, its a mindset
u might be dull
>>36489599
I'm OP you bastard
![tumblr_nwag879hr81uw71lqo2_500[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/SybE4Gg.png "tumblr_nwag879hr81uw71lqo2_500[1].png")
>>36486710
Well you've come to the right place
>>36489607
i was only one of those guys replied to, but i was laughing about the frog shit and the granda alpha guy
>>36486713
I used to lift in my room while listening to euphoric trance on my 80w amp, sometimes I would have rest periods of like 5 minutes because I would get distracted by beautiful songs. But I loved to time it so that an intense drop would come in the middle or at best, near the end of my squat set. Motivation to pump out more reps. Hehe, and I would squat under some random steel beam i found in my dad's garage, supporting my stack of those concrete weight plates, resting on two kitchen stools with cushions on 'em in plastic bags. :'D
My run is sometimes interrupted when I see this qt sun bathing like 1-2 times out of the month. I know it's creepy and all but I run the hill right behind her house and she doesn't seem to know there is a trail there. It's wooded though so I've got more than enough cover
>>36486427
Cats are weird. They approach people who don't like cats to stay away from faggots who want to endlessly stroke them. Some cats are just fiends for petting though and won't leave anyone alone. Dogs can smell your fear and anxiety and adrenaline and diabetes.
Basically, you're a loser.
>>36489836
But I'm the token fat guy when I go over to friends houses. I've literally never met a dog/cat that hasn't instantly fallen in love with me. Which generally means parents end up loving me too.
>tfw I'm losing weight because of tons of people worried about my health. My friend even offered to pay for my gym membership because he said he loves me. I'm paying for it myself though.
I love you guys.
>>36486706
>>36486733
>>36486979
>Here's the story of Rhodesia starts playing
>>36486910
handling frogs with bare hands can kill them.
sorry breh
>>36486591
Oh shit
>>36486616
>low fat
enjoy your fucked up hormones
>>36486427
Just like girls, animals are not interested in men who dont do 1/2/3/4 4x10
>>36486427
if they smell you, you have cancer
>be me
>want to start running but scared of embarrassment
>decide to go at like 3am so nobody will see me
>leave house
>walk for a few minutes to get warmed up
>ready to start jogging
>start jogging
>all of the sudden a startled fox runs out in front of me
>i nearly have a heart attack
>be me
>>36486353
I can't even pet the family cats...
>>36486427
I don't know, but I did experience the weirdest thing when I was a mailman for a while. Dogs hated me, but cats fucking loved me. They would jump down from their perch and cross streets just to be petted by me. Some would follow me their entire street and call out to me. If I was on the job it'd return to normal.
I guess mailmen are pussy magnets.
>>36486726
I HAVE
THE SAME
FUCKING NIPPLE
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT
>>36491368
I mean if I was off the job. Then the cats would return to their 'normal' behaviour.
>>36486427
I honestly think it's if you are chilled. They can read that shit.
>>36491272
>normal
Yesterday I met a deer while out running
>>36486329
>>36486726
>>36491470
Can I save this?
>this fucking thread
It's 1am and I'm losing my shit over here
>>36486726
i can't stop laughing
>>36486631
HILARIOUS AND ORIGINAL XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
>this fucking thread
>>36486706
>>36486979
......I'll have 82
>>36491470
>tfw I'll never give AssSR the penis
>>36492648
No.
>>36489887
you sound like a decent person but you're fat so I hate you
>>36486329
>>36486369
who is this sperm worm?
>>36493005
Annasophia robb
>>36487310
My boxer's start swatting at me. I swear they're also saying "keep going fagit."
My dogs are mean.
>>36493031
god she is in some shit films. Thanks anon
>>36491446
>met a deer
So not "saw a deer." The two of you were stopped at an intersection and struck up a conversation.
Or are you that retard I saw talking to my neighbor's lawn ornaments?
This may possibly be the comfiest theard on all of 4chan
>>36493058
>met a deer
He's dating the deer
>>36493035
My boxers get antsy then get in my way on pushups.
Then if I challenge the one in any way he starts barking at me and jumping around only to get attacked by the alpha... female. The other boxer is just a downer
>>36491380
>I HAVE
>THE SAME
>FUCKING NIPPLE
It's galled "gyno," bruh.
>>36493085
Same here. If my male starts shit, the female will bite at him, but she has no reservations trying to swat at me whenever. I spent a lot of puppy years boxing with mine, so that's all they think of when anyone's near the ground.
>>36486726
> not wearing ryan goslin car pants
>petting random cats in the street
Bro you're gonna get rabies
>>36487022
Yell it's just a prank bro
>>36493126
The big one is usually kept in line by her, but once I built my homegym he fucking loses it when he goes in the garage. He's like a giant puppy that tries to playfight with everything. He bounces around spinning and comes at me and both dogs for no reason. She usually ruins all his fun but she can't do anything in the garage. He's like a good 20 pounds heavier.
Pretty funny.
The female is in charge everywhere else though. If her and the other male fight she plows him to the ground everytime. She keeps all the cats in line as well. And then she comes over expecting a reward and love when she's mean to animals. I think she thinks she's protecting me when she attacks the big male because she'll get in between me and him and keep attacking him whenever he gets close.
>>36486640
I love them to pieces but they die too young :(
>>36493057
Any time breh. Yeah, 13/10 ass though. Yowza!
>>36486616
>cardio only makes you hungry
Then eat a protein bar or a banana or something before you do cardio, it's that simple
>>36493058
We ran past each other. Nothing unusual. Cool guy.
>>36493058
Lawn flamingos are great conversationalists when you're on acid breh.
>>36486651
Coon hound cause their specialty is hunting those dirty nigs
>>36486329
>having the urge to drop everything just to pet the fucking cats
enjoy your toxoplasmosis
>>36486591
FLAWLESS VICTORY
>>36486726
u look like wojack
