>go to the gym
>stretch
>ready to bang out bench
>leave
GOTTA CONFUSE THE BODY GOD DAMNIT! How do you confuse the body to leave humanity behind?
>>36291879
>get up early on sunday
>eat big breakfast
>ready for sunday work out
>stay at home playing video games and eating junk food
Body never saw it coming
>be born
>time to conquer the world, achieve my dreams, marry a beautiful woman and father strong sons
>become a 26 years old kissless and jobless virgin who lives with mom
I'm expecting insane confusion gains in the future
I got my body into a 20-year routine of being a sack of shit by eating terribly and not doing any exercise, and then one day I started doing some, but the kicker is that I CONTINUED DOING IT, and started eating better.
Sometimes after a difficult session I still don't think it realises what's happening, based on how I feel.
>be straight
>only masturbate to gay porn
No homo, just after those confusion sex gains
>>36291879
I never plan a workout, I just have a big tub full of little notes with a different exercise on each one. I just pull a note out and do that workout, body has no fucking idea what's going on
>>36291879
>watch thousands of form videos for squat, bench, deadlift
>zip starting strength into my gym bag next to my belt and oly shoes
>drink coffee, eat a quick 2000 calories of pasta for my preworkout
>deep knee bends before I put on the wraps
>pay the foam roll toll
>ask around the cross training area/squat racks how many more sets we lookin at
>put 405 on the bar
>dart over to row machine, 10,000 meters
Life is a river and I'm paddlin' upstream, boys
>>36291966
kekerekooo
>>36292031
Did you lift anything besides putting weights on the bars?
>>36291879
>wake up early
>take preworkout mix of cardarine, ephedrine, caffeine, modafinil
>go to gym
>closed for holiday
>head home
>never taken preworkout mix without working out immediately after
>literally high as shit
>crank rave music
>play call of duty
>scream as loud as i can whenever i kill someone
>neighbors think im nuts
>constantly strut around the house flexing and looking in mirror
>havent been to the gym in weeks now
>still using preworkout daily
>>36291879
>grow out my hair
>dress in girl clothes
>wear makeup
>take female hormones
>suck dick
My body is going to fucking gush out testosterone after this confusion cycle.
>>36294022
>call of duty
>on a noobstick
cs masterrace
>>36291879
>Body is used to eating 4 scoops 3 times a day
>decide to change things up
>do 3 scoops 4 times a day for hypertrophy
They said it couldnt be done
>buy ingredients for healthy meals all weekend
>end up drinking and eating pizza everyday
All my lifts doubled, dick grew 3 inches.
>go to the gym
>don't warm up
>load up my max bench
>lift it without arching, shoulders not retracted, and let it fall down on my neck
>press it, grinding out the rep for minutes
>leave
WHATEVER IT TAKES
Whenever I do regular pushups I visualize I'm benching 4pl8,suddenly it becomes extra hard to do even 5. Continue pushing despite the phsyical hardness. When I finish I look at my chest and it's swole as fuck,cuz I benched 4 pl8. Miring mentalifting gainz
>wake up after a 200 year hybernation
>stretch every single finger individually for 10 hours
>stretch every toe for 11 hours
>stretch my neck and limbs for 450 combined hours
>spin my hips for 50 hours
>step outside of my hybernation chamber
>gaze at the horizon, witness the beautiful world after 200 years of advancement
>start fapping
>cum
>go back to sleep
My body never saw it coming
>massive steroid cycle
>2000 kcal/day deficit
Oh mama if my bicep was confused
>wake up
>go to the gym
>straight to the power rack
>load up max, no warm up, no safeties
>begin to squat
>drop the bar onto the ground and start deadlifting
>third rep, didn't even finish set
>clean and push press the rest of the reps
>hire team of homeless people to try to rob me whenever they see me
>whenever they try to rob me, my muscles get confused as furk
>start doing pushups and situps while being robbed
>wallet was stolen off of me 5 times already
WHATEVER IT TAKES
>back day
>just before i reach the gym apply the handbrake and swerve the car through 2 lanes of oncoming traffic
>crash into a field
>climb up an electricity pylon
>start with wide grip, close grip, towel pullups, all the variations
>reach the top
>eat talcum powder instead of drinking my shake
>attach my cock to the cable electrocute my balls and die
gotta shock the body right babe
>>36291879
What the fuck is this guy's name again?
>>36291879
that guy's tats are gonna look hella bad when he loses muscle
>>36297864
>Implying he's not going to die before that happens
>>36297363
middle class viola?
>>36292016
>body sees you write the notes
>has some idea of what's coming
>all gains stop
Terrible idea.
>>36292016
>not rolling a 10 sided dice on the gym floor to decide which muscle to work out
>>36297864
>Rich Piana
>Massive heart attack from steroid abuse
>Living on Borrowed Time
Pick Two
>>36298302
>body sees you write the notes
>has some idea of what's coming
That's actually true, muscle-based feedforward system
>>36297363
Opulent Harpsichord
>>36297363
the yep man
