How come he's able to easily shave his beard, yet his hair can withstand millions of degrees and mach 4?
Does he use a kryptonite razor or something?
you could try actually reading the comic and seeing the page where he shaves his beard
>>83914944
He lasers it off with his own heat vision and a mirror and if you actually read a comic or watched a cartoon you would know that, you filthy fucking casual.
>>83915026
Why don't they cover themselves in a reflective subtance to negate his laser vision then?
>>83915026
>>83915266
In the comic, he specifically uses a shard of his ship to reflect the laser usually.
The lenses in his Clark Kent glasses come from his ship too, which is why he has to lift them up to heat vision.
>>83915266
it's more about the specific angle of the beam and intent rather than it naturally bouncing off every reflective surface, dumbass
Ironically, the other Superman comic from this same month explains this.
>>83915266
He probably just uses a very low power laser to shave.
>>83915266
How many things in the universe can withstand a full powered superman punch? Not even reality can. So by that logic not many things would be able to reflect a full powered eye laser.
>>83915345
>not because, he doesn't want to ruin his glasses or have to explain why there's molten glass on his face
Do you guys think Superman abuses his super senses and see/hear Lois doing #1/2?
>>83915511
He probably did that to Lana once or twice and lost curiosity.
>>83915511
Yes, but you're asking in a pervy way, not like, he could always tell when people take a shit and it doesn't phase him anymore.
>>83915821
>Yes, but you're asking in a pervy way, not like, he could always tell when people take a shit and it doesn't phase him anymore.
Yeah, it's like being able to see people naked through their clothes. It might be fun the first few weeks, but at some point you would get bored and stop caring. Some things are only interesting because they are forbidden, and once the barriers are gone the thrill goes too.
I prefer the tactile telekinetic explanation.
Basiclly he subconscious turns off his invulnerability at that particular spot and shaves. This reason is also used to explain why buildings don't crumble when he lifts them.
It also gives superboy a leg up on supes since he can actually control how he uses it.
>>83915511
I don't think he can turn them off, dude probably constantly hears the sounds of millions of people all over the world shitting. Just unending poop noises that would drive a lesser hero mad.
>>83916513
Yeah it'd be the pooping that drives you mad. Not the constant death, screaming, murder and rape sounds he hears all day every day.
..and yeah, he doesn't haven an 'off switch', he's just really good at tuning them out.
>>83916513
Pretty sure that's how he beat Brainiac that one time.
>>83916505
>I prefer the tactile telekinetic explanation.
>Basiclly he subconscious turns off his invulnerability at that particular spot and shaves. This reason is also used to explain why buildings don't crumble when he lifts them.
>It also gives superboy a leg up on supes since he can actually control how he uses it.
The tactile TK thing was never used to explain how he shaved, during those comics he used heat vision as well.
>>83916576
I think most people poop more often than they rape.
>>83916576
I have no idea how he continues to even remotely function as a person. But I guess he's the same guy who determines whether to shiver based on how fast he can see air molecules moving so he's pretty beyond human comprehension anyways.
>>83916672
It depends on the part of the world they're in.
>>83916268
There's a seinfeld episode that goes along with this theory. About the nudity.
>>83916709
>subtle joke at india
Wrong board, /pol/.
>>83915345
But if his lenses are indestructible, how did he cut the glass into lenses in the first place?
>>83916782
supermans indestructibility trumps the glasses
>>83916576
CHUGA CHUGA
>>83916513
Forget hearing, imagine smelling.
>>83916268
The clothes they're wearing would make the flesh all weird and scrunchy anyway plus he has a very small window to focus on. Too much X-ray vision and he's going to see people without their skin or see internal organs.
>>83917142
I mean with super smelling he's basically got a chemical analysis machine hooked up to his face. I doubt he even perceives smells like a normal person. I'm not even sure he actually breathes except as part of his disguise.
>>83917142
>>83917391
>Ma Kent makes an apple pie
>Superman super-smelling
Found a new Superman weakness.
>>83917391
similar to his taste, he can pull smells/flavours apart and break them down to their base components.
>>83915026
Wouldn't this melt the mirror or am I stupid?
>>83915266
He would just punch them. Also piece of his ship muh angles and all that.
>>83917391
He breathes because he thinks of himself as human due to being raised by humans. He does alot of things he doesnt need to since it would feel weird not to.
>>83917669
See >>83915345
>>83917735
No wonder most Kryptonians go super evil on getting to earth. Yellow suns basically let them ignore almost all their actual biology and rapidly turns them into physics defying Lovercraftian horrors.
>>83917887
Nah. Most kryptonians were just dicks or the survivors tend to be people put into an eternal jail dimension that probably doesn't do a good job at keeping people mentally stable.
>>83915026
If laser vision can burn off his hair, doesn't that mean it can't withstand millions of degrees?
>>83918504
It's always been a question whether or not superman can do more damage than he can take. It seems to change a lot.
My answer will be a paradoxical 'both'.
>>83915026
More importantly, how does Supergirl shave? Or does she have full blown 70's bush because she doesn't wanna risk lasering her vajayjay
>>83918722
tear them all out one hair at a time at super speed?
Beard Bara porn when
>>83918722
Do Kryptonians grow pubic hair?
>>83918920
Why wouldn't they?
>>83919017
Why would they? Maybe it's just a side effect of the yellow sun. You don't know.
>>83918920
>Superman is able to grow facial hair, yet doesn't grow pubic hair
>when both of them come in during puberty
Honestly, it seems a little weird, even going by Supes's standards for weird, for him not to
>>83919052
But we know he's got body hair everywhere else, it's safe to assume he's got pubes too
>>83918920
I bet superman is uncut
>>83918920
Going by Powergirl, I'm going to assume at least the women don't.
>>83919219
I doubt there are jews on Krypton, so probably true.
Unless the Kents tried to get him done, in which case, good fucking luck with that.
>>83919272
>I doubt there are jews on Krypton
r u srs, bruv
>>83914944
>>83919384
>>83919217
Maybe Krypton hates pubes and slowly phased it out through selective breeding.
>>83919431
Yet they didn't phase out body hair knowing that it'd be a bitch to deal with when you have to wear skin tight clothing all the time? Come on man
>>83919454
their science was so stupidly advanced it was only a name away from being magic, so...magic skin tight clothing?
>>83919454
IT BUILDS CHARACTER
>>83919384
OY VEY MUH SIX SPACE MILLION
>>83915266
>>83914944
>I'm a retard and can't into common sense.
>>83919531
>SIX SPACE MILLION
>>83915026
Someone didn't get the memo that he ha heat vision not laser vision
His heat vision would just melt a hole through the mirror
>>83916782
Same way you shape diamonds. By rubbing them against other diamonds
>>83916729
India rapes and poops at a 1:1 ratio and they do both in the streets.
>>83915372
Remember when he had the electric powers and almost killed himself trying to do that?
>>83916683
He tunes most of it out, so it's more like a low-level buzz, kind of like conversation in a crowded room. There are certain things he always listens for, though. Stuff like Lois' heartbeat, or friends saying his name. There was a good comic somewhere with Ollie holding somebody who'd just been shot, so he shouted for Clark, who heard him from Metropolis and came speeding in to carry the guy to hospital. It's implied, though, that he only heard because Ollie was the one saying it and he knew the voice, if it was somebody he didn't know he might not have been paying enough attention.
It took him a lot of work to develop that degree of control, though.
>>83917887
Well, their solar absorbing stuff literally starts replacing their normal biological functions because it does everything for them, so yeah, kind of. Hell, Superman doesn't even need to sleep, he just does it because it's a habit and he likes to, especially if he's sleeping next to Lois and lets her heartbeat so the him to rest.
That's sounded creepy, now that I think about it.
>>83922665
Sounds creepy from an outside perspective, but then again, a lot of things regular couples do seem strange or creepy as well.
>>83922665
It's actually explains why red sun radiation messes Superman up so bad, it's his whole body suddenly needing his organs to work for the first time in decades.
>>83922665
how can he be sure he isn't going to suddendly move or have a nocturla spams and smash Lois?
>>83922927
super-muscle control.
Seriously, Superman is a fucking god when it comes to it. Even while sleeping.
>>83922927
He sleeps like a log, as it were.
>>83922927
>and smash Lois?
as well as the continental plate they happen to be sleeping on...
>>83922641
How far away is Star City from Metropolis? Even if Supes could still hear it when it arrives, sound only travels so fast. It would take time for it to reach Metropolis
>>83923057
>sound only travels so fast
He can hear things much faster than it would take the sound to reach him. His hearing seems to function completely differently than ours does.
Probably not even by sound at all.
>>83923057
>How far away is Star City from Metropolis?
opposite side of the united stats
>>83923088
this. his hearing is the speedforce of ear powers
>>83923088
Maybe yellow sun also gives him the ability to psychically sense vibrations from people, regardless of distance?
>>83923057
I think it's probably less he hears sounds and more feels the exact location of every molecule in the atmosphere of the planet and can deduce sounds based on their movement.
>>83923110
Yeah I've always assumed there has to be a psychic element to superman's power set, likely something he uses subconsciously.
>>83923128
That would work...but he once heard Green Lantern calling for help from across a galaxy. While asleep.
There's clearly something else there.
>>83923148
So we've established Kryptonians are actually god tier psychics. That also explains how Clark could smell brownies from space when he got high on kryptonite
>>83923148
Maybe he somehow can feel the gravitational pull of every molecule in the universe, and recognize the gravitational change that relates to the molecular movements equivalent to sound of Green Lantern calling for help propagating through air somewhere.
>>83923172
>That also explains how Clark could smell brownies from space when he got high on kryptonite
Loved that scene so much. Zatanna a cute.
>>83923174
The gravity thing has been used as an explanation for his flight, so you could see it as an extension of that, sure.
>>83923202
I mean all gravitational forces continue for infinite distances, they just get weaker the farther away from the object you get. So theoretically something could be sensitive enough to determine the location and movement of all objects in the universe based on how their gravitational force feels.
>>83919219
Conditions for Superman being uncut :
- Not jews on Krypton
- Ma and Pa Kent do not pratice circumsion
- If the Kents are for the circumsion, little Kal-El must have been invunerable since young age
>>83923223
That's a really good theory. Haven't thought about it like that.
Something else I've often wondered about that, but never bothered to look up.
Do changes in gravity occur instantly throughout the universe? Or do they propagate ala a wave at light speed?
Like, if the sun were to instantly vanish right now, we'd still receive light for ~8 mins or so. Would we still be kept in its gravitational influence for that long too?
>>83923242
>- If the Kents are for the circumsion, little Kal-El must have been invunerable since young age
Not if it's post-Crisis where he gets his powers as he grows. So if they snipped him when he was really young before it kicked in, he's cut
>>83923253
I've heard physicists talk about gravitational waves but I do not know if they are instantaneous
>>83914944
i know he can pierce his own skin with his heat vision so its reasonable to assume he can burn his own hair
although that was a difrent superman
>>83923283
turns out there is a conveniently obvious wikipedia article
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speed_of_gravity
They move at c. So that rules out gravity waves for supermans hearing.
Gonna go with either magic or speedforce on this one...
>>83919894
works for me
>>83916513
pretty much every superman story mentions learning to tune that out
>>83923282
So the question is : do the Kents are for the circumsion ?
>>83923057
it really is supprising that his hearing of all things requires the most suspension of disbelief.
i can deal with most of his hearing stuff but it bothers me when 2 characters carrry a conversation while moving so fast they are long gone before the sound crosses the distance between them
>>83923305
I got a theory, Kryptonians unconciously control relativity. Relative to Clark, an object with huge mass weigh pretty much nothing. Relative to Clark, the speed of sound, light, gravity etc is much faster allowing him to respond instantaneously
>>83923318
I'll never understand stories that have something break Superman, cause if literally spending hours hearing and recognizing the sound of every single horrible thing that happens on the entire planet before he could figure out how to tune it out didn't break him I can't see what the hell would.
>>83923389
So the laws of reality apply differently to kryptonians when empowered by sunlight?
Would do wonders to help explain Superboy Prime can fuck around with universal laws and structures so easily.
It also fits the bill when it comes to very late years Superman stories. Like Prime one million or the adventures of superman 'end of the multiverse' stuff. He gains so much control over what was originally something done unconsciously, that he can warp reality to how he sees fit.
>>83923423
Exactly, shattering reality with a punch? Relative to his fist, reality has the sturdiness of crackers
>>83923335
Doubt it. Kent and Clark are pretty old timey English surnames, so they wouldn't be of the shekel heritage
>>83923450
>shekel heritage
I keked out loud
>>83923057
>>83923088
My problem with this kind of thing is that sound is not like light: sound dissipates over distance and cannot travel forever.
There's a point where it disappears.
So that's why the whole "psychic perception" thing you're all discussing in this thread makes more sense.
>>83923450
That's because Ma and Pa Kent may be old timey that Clark might be cut. I read that 60% of americans are cut : in the time, people believed it prevents masturbation.
>>83919872
heat is just radiation of a different wavelength
he can emit different forms of radiation, he probably just adjusts the wavelength so it's reflectable
>>83916782
they were in fact conveniently in the shape of lenses
>>83919454
They used kryptonian science to make their body hair collapsible.
It's also why Clark doesn't have a beard but can grow one really quickly.
The hairs were just retracting during their lasering, they come right back up when Clark wants them to.
>>83923450
>>83923985
I don't think Ma and Pa Kent would have their son for the purposes of preventing masturbation, honestly. They don't seem the type.
>>83924109
I dunno man, think about the whole woman of tissue argument. Imagine how fast he shoots his Krpytonian seed. Now imagine all the fapping you did when puberty kicked in. Now add the two together.
Kent's HAD to stop him from masturbating so their house would still be in one piece
>>83924130
They wouldn't have known that at the time.
Also the Woman of Tissue argument is shit.
>>83923057
In Secret Identity, the protagonist who got Supermans powers wondered the same thing. He went to the conclusion that he can hear stuff on the other side of the planet or from outer space instantaneously not because he has superhearing, but because his powers are psychic and he subconsciously shapes them to be Supermans powers.
That's the explanation for the Plutonians powers in Irredeemable, too, he got these powers because he has some kind of psychic omnipotence and that shaped his powers because he needed exactly those. It's based on surroundings, he gets whatever he needs to exceed them. I think it's a pretty good explanation for a postmodern level of scrutiny.
>>83919219
Kyptonian dicks probably naturally look like a cut human dick. Not any stranger than any alien race looking exactly like humans.
>>83923282
Superman has regen. If he was cut at a young age before his powers kicked in wouldn't it just grow back?
>>83916576
This is what autism hearing feels like.
>>83924247
Or they have pincers.
>>83924297
Can Superman regen a limb ?
>>83924424
Really? That's interesting. Are there people on the spectrum who have learned some level of control over that? I imagine that would could make you quite perceptive.
>>83925965
A housemate of mine has exactly what you're talking about.
Perceptive is pretty much the opposite of what I'd call him. He (they) seem to lack the ability to focus it, especially in exceptionally loud circumstances or ones with many sources of sound, like a shopping mall for instance.
The guy I live with will freak if it gets too much.
>>83926019
Ok, that's what I thought. It wouldn't be considered a handicap so much if there were people who could control it. Would be cool though if there were actually working strategies for people on the spectrum to tune out stuff with concentration. They would still be hindered as it requires effort, but they would probably also "get" more than normal people whose perception is primed according to their ways of life.
>>83926066
On the other hand though, a regular Joe like you and me could train to actually take in more information, with much more ease than someone on the spectrum could do the opposite.
>>83926097
That's true, I guess. The only reason I got interested in the first place was because I'm into Vipassana meditation where you try to let sensual information flow in without (much) filter and get a sort of conscious flow going. It has made me more perceiptive and open for stuff, although not in a superpowered way, of course. The world becomes multi-layered when I'm idle and not too preoccupied with work and whatnot. Your control gets better, even though you just let it in methodically. I imagine this kind of training could help people on the spectrum, too (but probably there already have been studies with this or variants of it).
>>83926210
>Vipassana meditation
What got you into it? Do you find it helps you out in life? I've been looking to get into something akin to that and am wondering what your experiences are with it.
>hair, excepting the root, is fully keratinized and the cells are no longer living
His hair shouldn't have any of his super-properties and he should be balder than Lex.
>>83926260
his hair doesn't have properties after it's cut but while it's lying on his body it is protected by his bio-aura
dumbass
>>83919272
Kryptonians are basically the space jews with Superman being Jesus. Superman got kille dby Doomsday who as kryptonian dna. He is killed by his own kind just like Jesus.
>>83926241
I've always been interested in altered states of mind, but I'm not much of a drug user (occasionally weed, but that's about it). I'm also much into martial arts, so that's also a factor that got me interested in meditation, to sort of get a grasp on everything around you without pulling away the focus from your "enemy".
So over the years I got into regular buddhist and taoist ideology, mantra meditation, chaos magick and other stuff. While I love occult symbolism and paraphernalia in comics, stories and movies I find it distracts from actually experiencing altered states of mind, because the symbolism itself gets you into a sort of mood of expectation.
So a few years back I started experimenting with just sitting around, breathing. Gradually and ironically, I found the most effective way to transcend the environment and see my own inner workings is to perceive the environment as direct and unhindered as possible. Results just flow from that. There is nothing wrong with mantra meditation and stuff like that, but I just can't sit around chanting a mantra or some magic phrase like "IAO!" without getting ahead of myself in my mind and blocking the very thing I want from happening. I'm a very understated dude and need something that reflects that.
Only later did I learn that there is a buddhist meditation method for my unstructured approach called Vipassana meditation. A friend discovered this dude called Shinzen Young who teaches it and has a free book on his site. He's very good at relating abstract concepts and states of mind and most importantly, he's very undramatic and pragmatic.
>>83924045
Stop talking out of your ass
Other idiots might parrot your stupid shit
Superman's hearing works the same way Flash's speedforce does: metafictionally. The Flash Arrives On The Scene Just In Time. Superman Saves The Day and Catches People When They Fall. Every power Superman has is in service of Superman saving the day. His hearing is also in service of this so it isn't bound by 2nd or 3rd dimensional physics. Superman can hear a pin drop in Hell from the surface of Jupiter if that's what the story needs for him to Save The Day. It's the same reason Superman can beat Mxyzptlk. His story trumps the god-like powers of the 5th dimension's inhabitants.
>>83926459
but he can emit different forms of radiation.
What are you crying about?
>>83926470
The whole part about making shit up
>>83926416
interesting stuff. Thanks dude.
I'll check that guy out.
>>83926459
while i did present it in a simplified context ignoring convection and conduction heat is in fact transmitted as radiation
Comics are dumb
>>83926487
What part? he didn't make anything up.
>>83926514
My prediction is already happening
>>83926487
Didn't Superman literally become two different beings on two different wavelengths once?
>>83923088
He's smelled people baking brownies in north Dakota while he was in SPACE. His senses are more like analogues to our ones than a stronger version of the same thing.
