Who else is hyped for this beautiful trainwreck?
>>81337404
No hat = no sale
>>81337478
Reportedly he still uses the hat from times to times.But he quit hamburgers and became caffeine-addicted as a result.
As a lifelong Archie fan, I'm fucking dreading it.
I don't know why I need this so bad. It sounds so aggressively terrible that it needs 10 seasons and 2 spinoffs.
Seriously, I can't understand who the target demographic is. People who watched OC and Gossip Girl? Is this sounding more risque than either of those?
>>81337708
It feels like those old CW shows like Dawson's Creek, except cranked to 15 and with Archie for some fucking reason.
It reminds me of those ideas people always throw around of making superheroes into teenage high schoolers. It's gonna be stupid and you should probably just make your own characters if you want a teen drama so bad.
>>81337708
It's satire. It's basically poking fun at the wholesomeness of Archie AND the edgy teenage TV shows we have nowadays.
>>81337384
Can someone post those character bios and cw pasta pls
I am fucking ready for some MILFs. I have a soft spot for them
>>81337944
I hope it is. I really hope this is the case and the staff is just taking the piss because if they're serious, this is ridiculously awful
>>81337991
I got you, senpai.
ARCHIE ANDREWS (K.J. Apa)
>Archie is an intense, conflicted teen, a high school sophomore who is still boyishly handsome but got pumped after working construction for his dad during the summer. He is grappling with heavy issues and juggling the unexpected interest of several girls while discovering his passion for writing and performing music against his father and his football coach’s better wishes. He harbors more than one dark, terrible secret.
BETTY COOPER (Lili Reinhart)
>Betty is a blonde and pretty sophomore some self-esteem issues and affinity for Adderall. Eager-to-please, wholesome and studious, Betty has a super-crush on her longtime best bud, Archie. But tired of being the "perfect" everything, she turns to her new friend, Veronica, for life advice. Betty hails from a dysfunctional family and has a coveted spot on the cheerleading squad — though with certain conditions...
VERONICA LODGE (Camilla Mendes)
>A silver-tongued stunner, Veronica has just returned to Riverdale from New York with her divorcee mother, following a scandal which resulted in her father going to prison. Extremely intelligent, self-confident and immediately popular, Veronica is eager to reinvent herself — from Mean Girl to caring friend. In the process, she sets her sights on Archie to become her new boy toy, but soon uncovers deeper feelings bubbling beneath the surface.
>>81337708
I eagerly await the Sabrina spin off
JUGHEAD JONES (Cole Sprouse)
>Jughead is a sullen heartthrob with a philosophical bent. The lanky lad is Archie’s former best friend, seeing as the two still are smarting from a rift that took place between them. Angry, Jughead refuses to take the olive branch being proffered by Archie, the hurt goes that deep.
JOSIE McCOY (Ashleigh Murray)
>Josie is a gorgeous, snooty and ambitious sophomore, and the lead singer for popular band Josie and the Pussycats. She has zero interest in recording any songs written by fellow teen Archie, but that won't stop him from trying.
>>81337944
I don't think you know what satire is.
>>81338070
>Archie is an intense, conflicted teen, a high school sophomore who is still boyishly handsome but got pumped after working construction for his dad during the summer
This can't be real
>>81338115
There will never be another live-action Sabrina show. They know it will never gain the level of iconic of the old show
KEVIN KELLER (Casey Cott)
>Betty's cheerful, openly homosexual, quick-witted best friend, Kevin struggles to mend fences with his conservative father, who refuses to accept his son's lifestyle, and is seeking for love in all the wrong places, only to find a kindred spirit in the most unexpected place.
REGGIE MANTLE (Ross Butler)
>A wealthy and sarcastic sophomore who fashions himself as the big man on campus, Reggie feels threatened when Archie arrives to steal his spotlight, and makes it his mission to destroy his new rival.
MOOSE MASON (Cody Kearsley)
>The star quarterback of Riverdale High's football team, Moose becomes fast friends with Archie when he decides to join the team. What he lacks in brains he makes up for in brawl, and has a particular soft spot for milfs.
>>81337944
>It's satire.
Bullshit, they are playing all this ridiculous high school melodrama with a straight face and the CW's target demo will eat it the fuck up.
>>81338179
But it IS anon-kun! Highs cool girls need a ship too set sail on or else they will drown in mental blood from their bleeding feminist hearts.
DILTON DOILEY (Daniel Yang)
>Dilton is a brilliant student at Riverdale High, whose introverted demeanor makes him an easy target of the local bullies.
>>81338112
>Veronica has just returned to Riverdale from New York with her divorcee mother, following a scandal which resulted in her father going to prison
>resulted in her father going to prison
FUCK
what did they do to Mr. Lodge?
>>81338216
Melissa Joan Hart was going to a meeting recently about some Clarissa and Sabrina returns. But it was only a meeting, nothing concrete.
I doubt most people here would want to see Sabrina the WILF though.
This is such a marvelously obvious yet bad idea that I can't wait.
CHERYL BLOSSOM (Madelaine Petsch)
>This fiery redhead is rich, entitled and never accountable. A manipulative mean girl who kills with kindness, she recently lost her twin brother Jason Blossom in a mysterious accident, one that might involve Archie.
>>81338160
The fuck? Why not Valerie or Nancy? Why does Josie have to be the nigger?
>>81338434
This would only be redeemed if this accident ended up causing an Afterlife with Archie plot in season 2.
MELODY VALENTINE (Asha Bromfield)
>A cheerful and naive member of the popular band Josie and the Pussycats.
VALERIE BROWN (Irie Hayleau )
>An ambitious and career-obsessed member of the popular band Josie & The Pussycats.
>>81338529
>cheerful and naive
Raped by episode 3.
>>81338138
>One of the twins from Suite Life as Jughead
Now I'm curious.
>>81338160
>Josie is black
>when there's already a black member of Josie & the Pussycats.
fuck this.
Forgot pic.
VALERIE BROWN (Irie Hayleau )
>An ambitious and career-obsessed member of the popular band Josie & The Pussycats.
>>81338582
Josie has the more recognizable name and they need a black person.
Also all the Pussycats are black in this.
Not a fuckin racist or anything, but making the whole Josie band black just seems really fucking retarded. THANKS DIVERSITY.
JASON BLOSSOM (Trevor Stines)
>Cheryl's twin brother, with whom she shared a very intimate and passionate relationship, Jason has died in a mysterious accident over the summer, whose details haunt the teenagers of Riverdale.
FRED ANDREWS (Luke Perry)
>Archie's father is a generally easygoing owner of the family construction company, who hopes Archie will take over the family business one day. However, Fred is not without skeletons in his closet...
>>81338447
Yeah I don't get it either. Her character profile fits Valerie more too
>>81338671
Oh god, I can see the saucy incest angle already.
HERMIONE LODGE (Marisol Nichols)
>Veronica's seductive, equally silver-tongued mother, who returns to Riverdale in search of new and better prospects after he husband's scandalous and murky imprisonment.
So some ginger fuck is trying reach stardom through a black girl band.
How is this making any sense?
HAL COOPER (Lochlyn Munro)
>Betty's father, Hal is a succesful pharmacist and supportive of his daughter's endeavors, but disapproves of her blossoming relationship with Archie and knows more about the secrets of Riverdale that it appears.
>>81338447
>>81338529
the entire band is niggers dont worry
>>81338721
That being Fred is giving cock to Kevin Keller.
>>81338721
Age has not been kind to Luke Perry...
ALICE COOPER (Madchen Amick)
>Betty's distant, emotionally brittle mother, Alice has a tempestuous relationship with her daughters and is the root of several of Betty's issues.
>>81338810
Hal going to join forces with Hiram Lodge when he comes to town?
>>81337404
Veronica's cute at least.
CLIFF BLOSSOM (Barclay Hope)
>Cliff is the wealthiest and most respected man in Riverdale, whose influence is felt in all aspects of town, and the father of Cheryl and Jason.
>>81338314
>Milf Hunter as his characterization.
I'll roll with it.
PENELOPE BLOSSOM (Nathalie Boltt)
>The domineering, ruthless matriarch of the Blossom family, Penelope is hellbent on finding out what truly happened to her son. And hell hath no fury should she not like what she learns.
>>81338179
Its from based Rob Rob
>>81338314
>milfs
POP TATE (Alvin Sanders)
>The soulful and humorous owner of the local hangout place that attracts the teens of Riverdale.
>>81338216
Paul Feig cannot let people remember what he once was.
>>81338943
Should have been Asian.
>>81338331
CW is mostly capeshit and fantasy scifi though
>>81338943
>token magical negro cook
its gonna be terrible
FLOYD CLAYTON (Colin Lawrence)
>The stern coach of Riverdale High's football team, Floyd views Archie as a diamond in the rough, and is willing to go the extra mile to ensure that Archie's musical endeavors won't get in the way of the needs of the team.
>>81337588
>But he quit hamburgers
WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?
>>81339055
I like that his quitting of hamburgers created another addiction
>>81339044
Wow someone that looks and acts the part.
GERALDINE GRUNDY (Sarah Habel)
>A dedicated but lonely music teacher at Riverdale High, Ms. Grundy soon finds herself caught in a compromising situation regarding Archie, one that both soon find themselves exploiting to their own gain.
>>81339010
The heart of WB Network has always been these aginst filled teen dramas. Another one was bound to show up.
>>81338092
>has a coveted spot on the cheerleading squad — though with certain conditions...
W-what conditions...?
>>81339138
dat upgrade.
>>81339010
Currently yes, don't pretend ridiculous melodrama doesn't plague so many of their shows.
>>81339138
Okay these have got to be April Fools castings now... Right?
>>81339181
>>81339165
This is co, we live on that shit
>>81339220
All real, bud.
>>81339166
She's "mowing some lawns" or "cleaning carpets" she's a very industrious worker.
>>81339138
>Archie fucks hot Grundy
BRAVO ROB
>>81339286
Moose gonna be jelly
>>81338943
>>81338529
>>81338160
>>81339313
Let's be real, none of that compares to trading Jughead's hamburgers for caffeine. Not even fucking close.
>>81338943
>Soulful
>Black
DAS RACIS'
Daily Reminder that Archie Comics Geoff Johns is the creator of this show.
>>81339309
Nah she looks to young for his tastes. Also when is Midge the Transgender MtF going to be introduced. She was a childhood crush of Kevin's before transition and now he openly resents her as a woman.
>>81339378
What the fuck does that even mean?
>>81339313
Its Destiny's Child
>>81338815
the classic costumes had leopard spots, I know they probaly won't have them in the show but part of me kinda wishes they would just out of morbid curiosity for how many people online would call it racist for them to have black people dress as "jungle cats"
>>81339407
It means its gonna be awesome
This due writes Archie Horror
>>81338671
>Archie drunkenly ran him over and had to bury the body in the woods a la I Know What You Did Last Summer
At what point does this stop being Archie?
>>81339458
No, I got that. I mean what the fuck does can't fob the rob rob mean. Most of those are gibberish, but this is completely incomprehensible.
>>81339470
Literally never. Archie, like Scooby Doo or Lupin III, is about character archetypes more than anything. That's what makes it so good.
>>81339336
>Implying that's not leading up to a dramatic season finale where Jughead breaks under the pressure of covering up Jason's murder, forces his way into Pop's shop and eats all of his hamburgers.
>>81339409
Or Cheetah Girls. Maybe they can get Raven as their overworked manager having to deal with Archie's bullshit trying to pass them songs.
>>81339487
To fob someone is to dismiss them, his name is Robert.
Thus cant Fob the Rob Rob
>>81339538
And then he fucks her?
Or no... VALERIE fucks her.
>>81339538
>Cheetah Girls
Now there's a blast from the past.
What happened?
>>81339532
I really just want Jughead to be the one character who never changes. He's just a clever asshole who likes food. His complete nonchalance in Archie v. Predator was amazing.
>>81339532
>Jughead burger withdrawl treated with extreme gravitas through the whole season
>epic finale with him crying into a pile of burgers played totally straight
yes
>>81339575
Wouldn't "Can't fob the Rob" roll off the tongue better?
>>81338340
hes going to ended up shooting up the school or bring a gun to school for DRAMA
>>81339589
>Archie V Predator
>Life with Archie
>Afterlife with Archie
>Chilling Adventures of Sabrina
Why is Archie so based?
>>81339618
I was inspired by CANT FLIM FLAM THE ZIM ZAM
>>81338112
>which resulted in her father going to prison.
NO!
>>81339641
Only white people shoot up schools
>>81338603
>>81338160
so they switched Josie and Valerie's characters?
>>81338581
Doesn't Jughead have an evil twin or something?
>>81339575
Yea she'd definitely be in a hidden relationship with one of the girls. She'd then use that as blackmail leverage to keep them tied to her when they reach the big time. To which Archie would be privy to and use that as leverage to get his songs to them.
We need Hiram Lodge warrior of truth to come into this seething rats nest that is Riverdale. Shine a light on their villainy.
I know they wont because this is basically gonna be a bad Beverly Hills 90210 but imagine if they went full surrealism with everyone acting like they are living in the 60's and episode plots being stuff like pic related.
>>81337384
Is this shit real or is OP fucking around? Betty as an adderall addict who fucked her way on the cheer squad? Grundy as some young woman instead of wise old lady? Mr Lodge as an underground kingpin? Archie's dad as a shady construction manager with mob ties? Jughead not being bros with Archie, who is implied to have killed Cheryl's brother?
This will be a train wreck
>>81339669
Hiram Lodge will be the show's Eobard Thawne. Come in later to fuck shit up.
>>81338112
No Mr. Lodge? WHO IS GOING TO DEMEAN ARCHIE AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY.
>>81339703
deepest lore!
>>81339686
its mostly white people but Asians do it to
>>81339669
Hiram will be back to save us all, don't worry. Smithers will pick him up outside of prison at the end of the season.
>>81338297
Is Reggie Asian?
>>81339716
I will watch every episode
>>81338112
>No Mr. Lodge
>No one to shower his baby girl with gifts.
>No loving millionare mogul Dad.
>>81338671
Huh, I didn't know they had Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch in Riverdale..
>>81339773
Blasian? Didn't he play the boyfriend on K. C. Undercover?
>>81338160
theres already a black pussy cat tho
>>81339708
Dilton would probably actually be the guy unraveling the curse of Riverdale given he was doing that in Life with Archie
>>81339834
How is that show?
>>81339838
Are black people on the limited list now or something? Curse you Konami
>>81339686
>what is Virginia Tech
>>81338767
Haha, they even photoshopped away the natural lines around her mouth and nose. Terrible.
>>81339873
all I'm saying is why race bend a character when you already have ome with the race you want?
>>81339949
Because its not like you need a certain number of blacks or whites or asians or whatever.
Black people arent Raigekis, you can have more than one
>>81339873
Overall okay for Disney fare. She's far less a bitch as it goes on and aside from the bratty kid sister trope it's not bad for what it is. Interested to see what her role will be in Spider-Man. I'm thinking White Tiger.
HUBERT SMITHERS (Tom McBeath)
>The Lodge family's dutiful lawyer who accompanies Veronica and Hermione to Riverdale, and has an agenda of his own.
>>81339990
White Tiger is my 5 and 7 year old little brother and sisters favorite superhero
GINGER LOPEZ (Caitlin Mitchell-Markovitch)
>A quirky, endearing student at Riverdale High.
>>81339949
Gotta meet the quota
At least they are not major characters. Though I would be pretty upset if they make the rock band into some Destiny Child's rip off
For e
TINA PATEL (Olivia Ryan Stern)
>A popular student at Riverdale High and friends with Veronica.
>>81337384
Is this the first ginger guy in a comic adaptation in the last... what, decade?
>>81339978
there's literally already a black pussy cat. If you're making all the pussycats black fine I guess but if you're going to race quota go the path of least resistance.
while you're at it hire some ugly actors. Sick of everyone on tv being no less than an 8/10 and slightly overweight people being fat. if you're going for 'realism' with races do it in other respects.
>>81340049
They are pretty much a Destinys Child pastiche with Josie as Jessie
>>81340087
Why does it have to be a quota, why cant just just have the pussy cats be black? Fucking Spider-man gets a mole. Invisible Woman is mexican and Bolivar Trask is a midget but we cant have black pussy cats?
>>81340087
I agree, but this is aimed at teens and they just want girls they can fantasize about and sparkly dreamboats.
>>81337384
No matter how many fucking times I see him, he always looks like Drake Bell.
>>81340145
Actually cw is focused on the 18-35 demo now adays
Think we'll actually see Fred getting a BJ or fucking Kevin in the alley.
Come in on the Aftermath Kevin wiping off a gob.
>>81340138
If this isn't a quota what is? you ever been to whitebread america? thete's parts of this country that are 90% white with the odd minority immigrant that's what riverdale has always been a small wholesome american midwest town full of white people. Minorities need not aplly, don't like it go read about newyork or chicago.
no race quotas. either adapt the work faithfully or make something new and then do whatever you want in regards to casting.
>>81338529
>Melody
>face like a horse
>>81338347
Do you want legit spoilers?Archie accidentally killed a boy (see >>81338434 ) and covered up the murder at the construction site he was working on. Veronica's dad got blamed for the murder instead after the body was found and so her mom got a divorce and he was sent to prison. Archie is guilty as fuck over it and that's why he's conflicted when around veronica.
>>81340278
Riverdale has tons of non white people. Do you even read comics?
Tidbits from the pilot
>Riverdale has homeless people, vacant lots filled with drug addicts and sleezy strip joints
>Kevin is trolling Grindr for random hookups, has sex with a guy in a gas station bathroom and watches gay porn on Betty's computer.
>Archie is blackmailing Ms. Grundy to advance his music career since they had sex over the summer. Also, he's nicknamed "Justin Gingerlake" by Josie.
>Veronica decides to keep Archie as a boytoy because "she's never had ginger before".
>Reggie asks Archie if he "tapped any MILF ass this summer".
>There's a rainbow party mentioned.
>Ends on a surprising gay kiss between Kevin and someone else.
>Betty and Veronica also have lesbian flirtation.
>Cheryl and Jason were not-so-subtly incestuous.
>>81340278
>Not casting colorblind
Do you even quality?
>>81340337
ROB ROB DOES IT AGAIN
>>81340362
that worked so well for Fantastic 4%
>>81338552
>Val is the lightest of the three
>>81340337
I love everything about this
>>81340337
>Also, he's nicknamed "Justin Gingerlake" by Josie.
So this was written a decade ago?
>>81340337
This is either going to turn out to be amazingly good or amazingly shitty.
>>81340470
Hard to get more impending Dumpster Fire than this.
>>81340473
He had a top 10 song two years ago.
>>81340337
I love this
>>81340328
Oh those wacky Riverdale kids and their antics.
The fuck.
>>81339589
>His complete nonchalance in Archie v. Predator was amazing
I read it more as shock.
>>81340337
Well it's a make-or-break depending on the execution.
>>81340547
Which is why we need the warrior of justice.
Did you think you see an Archie show with Hiram Lodge as the hero. I didn't.
>>81340594
Either way, eating food with exploded body parts on it is amusing.
>>81340328
How can Mr. Lodge have been blamed if he was living in New York City?
>>81340397
How was the movie sucking Michael's fault?
>>81340628
It was his site I'd wager and he was visiting the project I'd say. Maybe Archie took his car for a joyride.
Daily reminder the guy doing this wrote Gay archie fanfic, got int turned into a play, got SUED by Archie Comics until he changed the names and then got hired by and now runs Archie Comics.
Bravo
>>81340606
The script has been praised.
I feel this could be the next GLEE, back when GLEE was good.
>>81340681
The dream.
>>81340628Archies dad has ties with the mob. And while he lives in new york, he's bound to have visited riverdale at some point to check on the progress of his mansion. Archie's dad uses his mob connections to point the evidence at him instead of archie.
>>81340695
literally Archie Johns
>>81340684
So back when it was about Glee Club. So very early on.
Kevin will be the show's Felicity, except he'll hijack the story from episode 1.
>>81340681
Worked for Rebecca Sugar, cept she didn't have to change anything of her Ed Edd n Eddy porn.
>>81340337
kevin spinoff when. have it be gay veronica mars.
>>81340744
And whenever he's not around someone will ask "Where is Kevin? "
>>81340629
he certainly didn't help make it good. but I can't really think of a single good performance in that film.
>>81340738
GLEE became as a parody of high school dramas and then become one.
But it still had delightfully stupid moments as it went on, like the middle-aged teacher leading the student body throuhin a sexually explicit dance march to a vaguely rapey song. Marvel upon it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPzyYTz89SY
>>81340681
what i want to see that
>>81337944
Let's just hope that they don't go the Glee route and turn into the very thing that they're parodying.
>>81340744
so kevin will fuck archie and betty and veronica die. sounds like a win win.
>>81340855
Is that Supergirl?
>>81337384
I just want Netflix and CW to start talking about the inevitable Archie vs Punisher crossover
It's not in the Arrowverse and it's not iZombie so who cares.
>>81340857
>On April 4, 2003, Dad's Garage Theatre Company in Atlanta was scheduled to debut Aguirre-Sacasa's new play, Archie's Weird Fantasy, which depicted Riverdale's most famous resident coming out of the closet and moving to New York. The day before the play was scheduled to open, Archie Comics issued a cease and desist order, threatening litigation if the play proceeded as written. Dad's Garage artistic director Sean Daniels said, "The play was to depict Archie and his pals from Riverdale growing up, coming out and facing censorship. Archie Comics thought if Archie was portrayed as being gay, that would dilute and tarnish his image."[8] It opened a few days later as "Weird Comic Book Fantasy" with the character names changed.[9]
>>81341084
Knowing Cw it might be
How was the Waid and Dunhan runs ?
>>81340924
Yes. And we'll never see her team up with the Flash for a karaoke contest.
Duhhh stay out of Riverdale
So...
Reggie -> Asian
Dilton -> Asian
Josie -> Black
Melody -> Black
Pop Tate -> Black
Veronica -> Latino
Mrs Grundy -> Latino
Am I missing any?
>>81341779
That's what they yelled at the woman and her child when she showed offence towards to Kevin kissing his boyfriend.
Will this show have zombies?
>>81342528
>Mrs Grundy -> Latino
Wait, who's playing Mrs Grundy
>>81339091
Jesus?
>>81337384
Meh
