>any food can be eaten in two or three bites
>falling asleep right when you close your eyes
>>78263301
>burning something in the oven lets smoke everywhere but no fire alarm
>Shave and a haircut-
>>78263326
I love this because I wish it was real, so I wouldn't have to spend an hour or more every night, trying to turn my brain off.
>>78263301
>After getting beaten to a pulp, all it takes is the bad guy insulting your loved ones to give you the superhuman strength to take him down.
>>78263301
But I can eat McDonalds hamburgers in 2 bites...
>don't look down, don't fall down
>>78264440
My nigga.
>>78263301
>Even if someone is only a few feet away, they can't hear anything you're saying if they're off-screen
>You can fall from as high as you want and not die so long as something catches you before you hit the ground
>>78264514
>Woah, it's ok, I landed on this massive oak branch!
>>78263301
>You can instantly stop any dog, no matter how trained, from attacking you, by throwing a steak.
>bullets don't hit
>you can breathe underwater as long as you have a snorkel
>>78263326
>>78264417
If you had a job or did anything besides being a fucking NEET, you would realize that most people are exhausted at the end of the day and can fall asleep rather quickly.
>Floating in mid air before falling.
>>78264712
>rather quickly
That's still not "as soon as you close your eyes" you faggot.
>>78264793
I've had that happen to me you cum felching queer.
>>78264712
am super agitated when I get home a night so I can't fall asleep either way
