Good evening owls of /co/,
Ellisbolts and one-shots, go!
>>78163220
oh, Karla
>>78163225
>strategic leaves
>>78163220
Hello Storyteller.
>this cover
Maybe this is the yuri-fag in me talking, but Melissa and Karla should just fuck already. Their constant struggle for the position of alpha female is starting to look like flirting.
>>78163240
Pastebin: http://pastebin.com/0jKyyDvj
it's cold and rainy here ;__;
AMERICAN EAGLE
/
\ / /
\\\' , / //
\\\//, _/ //,
\_-//' / //<,
\ /// > \\\`__/_
/,)-^>> _\` \\\
(/ \\ //\\
// _//\\\\
((` ((
>>78163294
The problem is that you'd have to let down your guard at least a little bit to fuck Karla, and god that's a bad idea
All of a sudden that Oglaf strip comes to mind, you know, with the sexy thief and the squid ink?
>>78163304
it's been raining here nonstop since last night
fortunately I had nowhere to be today so I got a shitload of chores done
>>78163316
MURIKA FUCK YEAH
>>78163336
Tween girls love Songbird, this is canon DO SOMETHING WITH IT, MARVEL
and that is a straight ref to that infamous Mary Jane statue, lol
>>78163324
>All of a sudden that Oglaf strip comes to mind, you know, with the sexy thief and the squid ink?
I wouldn't put trapping her vagina past Karla
>>78163356
Exactly!
>>78163374
Poll: /co/ characters who would trap their junk, GO
>>78163240
This is one of those runs that revels in showing off obscure D-listers, and it's pretty glorious for it.
>>78163324
I think Parker era and beyond Karla would be relatively safe. She'd refrain from hurting Melissa too much. As long as they establish a safe word.
>>78163394
I bet sometimes Big Barda does just to see if she can catch Scott off guard
>>78163294
Why don't you just put a trip on it?
>>78163417
I want this as like cute and charming /34/ now
also the Santa thread just lost it at >1T37ON0S4F9A2
they are not getting what they want
>>78163354
Maybe New Avengers will start a toy line.
>>78163294
I feel like Karla may be the actual straightest woman in Marvel canon, although she'd probably eat pussy if she got some advantage out of it.
And really the whole Moonstone/Songbird alpha bickering is laughable here. Karla is clearly the alpha bitch of the two, Songbird's only in contention because they have rules to play by.
>>78163478
>>78163512
Karla is one of those women who really doesn't like other women.
>>78163336
>MURIKA FUCK YEAH
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbduDRH2m2M
>>78163354
As amusing as this is, the idea of capes having in-universe action figures based on them reminds me of that NBC Wonder Woman pilot. Ugh.
>>78163478
>also the Santa thread just lost it at >1T37ON0S4F9A2
those aren't /co/ related!
>>78163354
It's not even farfetched, I woulda been all over Songbird for her hair alone at that age. She's got that fairy princess thing going on, except she also does good work.
I was looking around for more interviews about Speedball from Quesada, and found this:
>NRAMA: That said, do you want to go back on your claim about Speedball being a “bad” character?
JQ: How about this - I want to kill Speedball. Dead is dead baby, I’ll kill Speedball and throw the ashes to the wind [evil maniacal laughter]
Did I mention that we’re killing off Speedball?
NRAMA: Wait, let’s check… uh, yeah…
JQ: I just wonder if a movie can ever be made with the character while still keeping that name. Can you imagine kids telling their mom’s that they want to go see “Speedball”, they need the Speedball toy, or want a Speedball for Christmas? Might as well give him a sidekick called One-Hitter. “Marvel Team-up featuring Speedball and One Hitter”, there ya go!
https://archive.is/hX5rQ
>>78163549
Aren't though?
>>78163512
Sure bro.
>>78163304
Suuure.
>>78163567
That hair, and WINGS?
Oh my god, I would have been too.
>>78163569
What did poor Speedball ever do to him?
>>78163569
fuck Joey Q
>>78163460
Pardon?
>>78163512
Karla may be the alpha bitch, but Melissa has the nice girl thing going on, making people more receptive to her ideas.
>>78163616Hot glue
>>78163569
Marvel staff were really petty during that era. I mean, Craig and Yost were very giddy to kill off so many X-Menand at the same time stress how awesome X-23 is. I mean, could you imagine how made the internet would be if the Wallflower sentinel thing happened now a days? (Yes, I know the last point was Ellis)
>>78163599
He's not A-List and was too damn happy.
>>78163586
I'm sort of sad Ellis cracking a joke was the closest thing to realizing Songbird's marketable, but she kinda totally is.
It's maybe better that they didn't, I guess, but she'd be mandatory merch bait in a theoretical T-Bolts movie that will never happen.
>>78163394
Batman.
>>78163599
The same thing Spider-Man's marriage did. Exist.
>>78163699
IIRC Gunn really really wants to do Thunderbolts
>>78163699
>but she'd be mandatory merch bait in a theoretical T-Bolts movie that will never happen.
3 Marvel movies a year.
It could totally happen.
>>78163720
DAMMIT KARLA
>>78163740
he is sweet on her, y/y
>>78163720
That would be really good. I've got total confidence in him to do that.
>>78163567
>>78163586
Hell, I'm a guy, and even I would've loved Melissa at that age.
>>78163569
>Quesada shitting on characters he personally dislikes
This blatant lack of artistic integrity is sickening.
>>78163637
It's also that Melissa's idea have this tendency to work out, Moonstone was running the show when Mac ate Steel SpiderMan's arm.
Moonstone's works best as the teams PR, and therapist not as a field commander.
>>78163616
>JQ: Let me clarify this if I can. When people say that there are no bad characters only bad writers or bad execution, I think that’s a ridiculous thing to say. I could sit here and dream up some insignificant character with no real proper construction and throw it into a book. Guess what, it’ll always be a bad character.
I concur.
>>78163761
I think the "villains who discover they like and are good at being heroes" plot would really mix up the MCU in a good way
and GOTG proved they can sell D-listers
>>78163720
poor Melissa ;_;
>>78163740
oh Karla
>>78163767
>This blatant lack of artistic integrity is sickening.
Marvel proudly wears this attitude on its sleeve.
Except now they have to tone it down unless they face the wrath of Tumblr.
>>78163720
After that Dragoncon, it sounds less likely.
>>78163800
>tfw they get Ooga Chaka'd
Do you really want that OP?
>>78163800
Problem is where do you pull the villains from? They keep killing them off.
>>78163720
Says father of the year Norman....
>>78163787
>>JQ: Let me clarify this if I can. When people say that there are no bad characters only bad writers or bad execution, I think that’s a ridiculous thing to say. I could sit here and dream up some insignificant character with no real proper construction and throw it into a book. Guess what, it’ll always be a bad character.
Bullshit, the fact that Squirrel Girl is popular now proves him wrong.
>>78163818
ON THE OTHER HAND, no, keep them safe from that
Fuck, GOTG the movie has ruined Marvel Cosmic for years, now
>>78163818
>>78163837
>still pretending to hate the GotG movie
>>78163699
>implying
Nah, Marvel is undoubtedly waiting to see how Suicide Squad does. And they actually are making a Civil War movie. If that does well, the T-Bolts movie shouldn't be far behind.
Marvel actually has a semi-competent marketing department, so there's a lot less never ever than with DC.
>>78163837
>>78163818
I still say it'd be more fair to blame the writers that felt they had to dive head first into being exactly like the movie instead of continuing doing their own thing or waiting for the movies to catch up.
>>78163868
It's an alright movie...but it has the same influence as the 80's Flash gordon movie.
>>78163755
I get the feeling Chen might be a legitimately thoughtful and decent guy, but we have several issues left to prove me wrongI really don't think he's going to turn heel, tho
>>78163837
>mfw I am having a discussion about how many panties $5000 buys in another thread
>>78163880
Let's be honest, Bendis and Humphries probably got too confused during DnA Guardians that they dumbed it down. In fact, all of Bendis' stories read like video game levels.
>>78163880
That's fair. I mean, I 1000% blame Bendis. He's very blameable.
I love that Songbird ain't dumb.
>>78163837
Not the movie's fault. If we DID get a legit, proper carbon copy of the movie in comics, we'd have someone doing DnA lite.
It's Bendis and Friends' fault for creating a product that resembles neither; the movie people were trying to be faithful to DnA.
>>78163936
ALRIGHT back to our story in progress, with telepaths in the mountain, and Robbie and Len hanging out
>>78163936
I think you may have gravely underestimated her Karla.
>>78163821
Movies don't really lend themselves well to superhero concepts like rogues galleries.
>>78163971
solicits when?
>>78163800
It'd require them to stop killing villains off.
And for them to set them up as bad guys. They also have to make sure the Trailers don't give up the fact that they're Ex-super villains a few weeks before the premiere.
>>78163991
>>78164001
I don't think you could possibly pull off the big twist as a twist with a movie
>>78164029
here we go
>>78164039
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH
>>78164001
You don't have to read ANY villain runs to jump into the concept of Tbolts, though. I'd like to think that most people can run with just being told "these guys are supervillains" at the appropriate time.
Because, I think, pretending they're not villains is still the right thing to do.
>>78163907
..... Which thread is this?
>>78163922
>>78163936
The back and forth between these two is easily may favorite part of this run so far.
>>78164045
we heading to crazy town faster than Slade
>>78164056
the santa thread
UGH that fucking Times Square Shuttle, worst train
>>78164058
Except symbiotes are easier to take serious than drugs made out of dead orphans.
>>78164018
The only way would be if they do some intensive marketing on not being clear how the movie will go, and not being clear on who would show up in the movie.
>>78163907
We talking fancy lingerie or cheap Hanes packs?
>>78164092
There are two more one-shots folded in, but..fuck it, we're on this ride, we're gonna take it straight
>>78164075
Well, I don't want to be a downer, but $5000 could probably get you 5000 panties if you don't care about quality. One for every day of the year...for thirteen years.
>>78164018
Same issue with the Ender's Game movie. You need to decide if you can pull off the twist, or just be up front with it. Especially when the twist is common knowledge.
I'm not really sure how you can pull off the Thunderbolts twist in a 2 hour block.
>>78164101
It's not clear, so I suggested the efficient thing to do would be to steal La Perla
>>78163354
Would you buy it /co/?
>>78164118
>One for every day
I was assuming they were buying panties so they could have a huge pile they could swim in like Scrooge McDuck.
>>78164134
I had to double-check, but apparently Kotobukiya hasn't made one yet.
Has Songbird ever teamed up with Dazzler?
>>78164150
oh fuck
>>78164092
>talking back to the crazy supervillain wearing his sister's skin for kicks
The Marvel public is so smart.
>>78164161
Hmm, that requires some math, but there should be enough cloth in there for it. Definitely enough to fill a hot tub or something with it.
>>78163354
Been while since I've been reminded of that statue
>>78164165
So,is he actually wearing the mask,is this just a sign he's completely flipped out?
>>78164092
>Mister Nazi Pervert-Suit Guy
Is Swordsman's suit that pervy? I thought Penance had the most perverse outfit.
>>78164092
The constant banter between guards is one of the best things about Ellis' run.
>>78164220
D: D: D:
>>78164215
you'll see :D
hold on to your asses, three issues of insane after this
>>78164235
>hold on to your asses, three issues of insane after this
Hell yeah
>>78164198
Saving this for whenever someone bitches about muh realism.
>>78164150
>With sound?
Dude, you'd be surprised at the sheer amount of magic wand bullshit you can pull of with sound waves.
>>78164235
>>78164232
There is no way guards don't banter. It's almost as good as the filthy women's wing of the Raft
>>78164193
>supervillain wearing his sister's skin for kicks
He's not really much of a supervillain, he's not wearing it, and he does need it for his powers to work. He's still crazy and creepy, but he's not Ed Gein-tier.
>>78164198
>>78164198
This reminds me of that old old Iron Man Story where he paints his Box of Scraps armor Gold to make himself more heroic looking
>>78164266
Still, I'm not going to snark at someone like that.
>>78164266
and if you have to go with a Germanic would-be übermensch, Zemo is just, well, Born Better
>>78164318
oh look
>>78164173
This page always pissed me off because it's such a cynical, British attitude to take. If they played American football like rugby the players would literally kill each other: American football players are larger, faster, stronger, more powerful as a whole. Their burst athletics are way above what you see in a Rugby game, which is way more focused on endurance.
>>78164330
also I wonder if there are any lies in here
>>78164338
>cynical, British attitude to take
Warren Ellis, you mean?
>>78164352
Oh, Firestar. Weren't you brutally murdered recently or something?
>>78164357
zing!
But it's true, I pulled up the stats to show someone once who didn't believe how much bigger a defensive lineman is than an average rugby player
>>78164305
So...why does he have to shave his head?
>>78164357
Yeah, of course. But like No Hero Warren Ellis and not Planetary Warren Ellis. It's one of these little things that makes me think he's probably a right cunt in real life.
>>78164386
which means of course now the relevant question is would you a J. J. Watt
>>78164388
he's fucking crazy
>>78164357
It's weird for a non-Brit to take though. Unless Doc Samson is one of those guys who studied abroad for a semester then never shuts up about it.
>>78164411
Don't ruin Doc Samson for me man ;_:
>>78164418
he's a gross Nazi, Songbird
>>78164397
>It's one of these little things that makes me think he's probably a right cunt in real life.
If you read his forums/blog thing, he's more of an attention whore like the guy who plays in an Tool-inspired garage band to pick up girls. And leaves Aleister Crowley and Richard Dawkins on his bed side table to show how deep he is.
>>78164433
delicious Karla
>>78164444
heeey, quads!
>>78164388
Because he's trying to evoke the "character development haircut" trope. He thinks it'll signify how he's a total badass who isn't playing around anymore.
He's mistaken of course, as he is just a poor man's Zemo and always will be.
>>78164433
>Poland
I did Nazi that one coming.
>>78163354
>Action Figures of Female Superheros actually existing
IMMERSION DESTROYED. THANKS MAHVEL
>>78163220
hey thread
Ellisbolts is crazy short in hindsight considering all it did
>>78164388
Neo-Nazi. Or he's going for some Natural Born Killers bit.
>>78164504
That's not an action figure. That's a vagina repellant figures that dorks with too much money buy.
>>78164521
Ellis is good at that.
>>78164274
>I'm in charge!
>>78164544
>orders are for giving, not taking
What?
>>78164553
An Alexander Haig joke? In MY /co/?
>>78164544
I'm glad this is good comics, considering the people it attracts.
>>78164271
I thought of exactly the same thing.
>>78163736
4, one a quarter
CAN'T STOP THE FIEGE
>>78164553for you
>>78164504
Are we gonna go full /toy/ now and have a good bitch about how toy companies are stupid when it comes to figures of female characters?
>>78164524
Neo-Nazis are kind of pathetic. Which is why they make for good punchable villains.
>>78164433
His Nazi affiliation is more ambiguous than Baron Zemo's, and Songbird didn't seem grossed out by him.
>>78164619
DOC SAMSON RAPEFACE
>>78164619
Oh god, this part.most satisfying curbstomp ever
>>78164634
yes, we can totally bitch about that
>>78164634
Except Crossbones, he's just disgusting.
>>78164646
Everything from here on out is just GET OUT YOUR LIGHTER
>>78164575
>this page
Pfft, Nothin' personnel, kid.
All he needs now is to teleport behind someone.
>>78164687
So in again not too many issues, Ellis has taken Penance at MAXIMUM EDGELORD and given Robbie a surprisingly nuanced and sympathetic arc. I really appreciate that.
OG Swordsman has a crazy life story. Feels bad a punk nazi kid took the name
>>78164709
it's like that one 4chan banner
>>78164738
The Hawkeye thing?
Is that even still canon now that he's a super secret agent for SHIELD XD?
>>78164659
Pretty sure we have before, but it's still and utterly baffling practice.
>>78164671
Crossbones was so bad even the Thunderbolts who hadn't turned face hated his guts.
>>78164738
Didn't a magic tree already steal his face?
>>78164764
??
I meant being a villain, joining the Avengers for redemption, all the shit with Mantis, then marring her as a ghost.
>>78164709
Totally. Good use of Doc, who's really unique and useful, and considering Penance was a huge breaking of the proverbial toys, Ellis is giving him something back that other writers can use.
>>78164805
Blunderbolts is going to be...frustrating? But maybe less so because you know we come out of it into Parker.
>>78164831
I really am heartbroken that Yost never got to Aracely and Robbie really having a heart to heart, though.
>>78164799
Wasn't he Hawkeye's ex-mentor from the circus? And then Hawkeye turned him in?
I wasn't aware of the later stuff.
>>78164831
It's going to be a story time of pain isn't it? I'm still recovering from Slade.
>>78164857
Oh yeah. He taught him and Barney both I think
>>78164903
HOLD ON TO YOUR ASSES, HERE WE GO!!!!
>>78164899
I will spoil nothing!
>>78164952
NORMIE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING
>>78164779
>>78164831
Was Swordsman just pretending to be retarded? Because until now he's been such a punk bitch. Now he's taking out Venom and going full on Coldsteel the Hedgeg on everyone? Someone's balls spontaneously dropped between issues.
>>78164952
This right here, this is what Bendis tried to recreate in Dark Reign Avengers.
Sure, we got "Bob, throw this man into sun", out of it, but anything this good? Pffft.
>>78164952
>that monologue
Jesus fuck, Norman!
>>78165018
I can't add anything to this page. Savor it.
I don't think anyone has ever written a better Norman than Ellis.
>>78164952
fucking sins past
>>78164952
I can't help but read these lines in Willem Dafoe's voice.
>THE HEART, OSBORN.
>>78165043
I swear to god this whole scene probably comes from the same place where Ellis got Dirk Anger from.
>>78165084
You mean, New Jersey?
>>78165043
And a bigger pay off than we ever got from Bendis!Osborn's shit
>>78165084
Yeah!
Also, the guards here.
>>78165043
>I'm so glad I never washed this particular costume
Nigga that's gross
>>78165043
This is like hearing Donald Trumps internal monologue.
>>78165124
This is possibly the best single page of the run.
>>78164260
>This guy is just a misunderstood Space Knight hero
THANKS BENDIS
>>78164785
What the fuck.
>>78165142
>he just fucking zooms off on his hoverboard
My sides are destroyed
>>78165043
>It smells like death, blondes, and victory!
>>78165155
I thought the retcon was Venom was a crazy member of a normal alien race
>>78165142
I think this entire run is one long, crazy advert for psychotherapy.
>>78165157
I think that's what happened. I'm still not that clear on what the hell happened in Celestial Madonna.
>>78165142
This is so batshit insane,and I'm enjoying every minute of it!
>>78165142
Finally, a clue is gotten
>>78165155
Making the symbiots into misunderstoood souls is possibly the most retarded thing ever, especially since it's explicitly a political view of Bendis being awkwardly inserted into space racoon books.
>>78165197
The original story was that the symbiote was the only sane member of a crazy race.
>>78165215
>still not that clear on what the hell happened in Celestial Madonna
I don't think anyone ever will be
>>78165209
If only Doc Samson were real ;__;
>>78165215
No, really, what. A magic tree? I don't know anything about this.
>>78165260
HAHAHAHAHAHA
FUCKING BENDIS
>>78165283
We're about to witness the most glorious fucking curbstomp in the entire series.
>>78165043
I subvocalize Goblin and Norman as having slightly different voices.
Always makes reading this page a bit of a trip.
>>78165283
Norman must have great legs to keep a pose like that on that board
Why hasn't Marvel gotten the Carnage-Man and Hobgoblin teams to write more? Both those minis were great
>>78165239
Political?
>>78165124
>dat RAPEFACE
>>78165142
>arm-eating retard
Why is this sequence so amazing?
>>78165328
Because Ellis has been slowly building to this the entire run, and the art works with it, and it's just so gratifying to see it all cut loose
there's another fight coming up, too
>>78165142
This should be handy.
you guys are making me wanna storytime Celestial Madonna. too bad it's long as shit. Avengers kinda has that LOSH problem in it's hard to find one short great arc.
All I remember really is that all the ladies were after that Vision dick.
>>78165366
>YOU DIDN'T HAVE A MOTHER!
>A PIG COUGHED AND YOU FELL OUT!
Holy mother of god this is incredible.
>>78165402
I promised Comrade I'd run some Busiek/Perez Avengers some time
>>78165431
The really dark coloring all through this run is a great look on Deodato's art.
>>78165431
Perez makes every time he draws Avengers great. It's like magic. He'd come fill in and the issue would be a stand out
>>78165283
>Please?
Please? Nigga, you just dropped the soap.
>>78165366
>Mommy.
>You don't have a mother. A pig coughed and you fell out!
I can't breathe!
>>78165460
and this time it seems intentional instead of a lazy shortcut to hide all his mistakes!
>>78165324
>NOT ALL THINGS YOU THINK ARE EVIL ARE BAD!
>THEY'RE JUST MISUNDERSTOOD!
>>78165480
Speaking of Perez...
There wasn't a note in it, but HOLY SHIT THANK YOU ANON I will hold it and cuddle it and maybe loan it out to make some converts
>>78165513
Ahhh, got it. Ugh. Boring. No nuance to it either, like "actually does crazy shit", I bet.
>>78165295
An alien plant that took the form of Swordsman so Mantis would be ok with fucking it.
http://marvel.com/universe/Cotati
At least I think that's what happened.
>>78165546
OH SHIT NOT JOKING
>>78165561
The more I read of that past clusterfuck, the more I enjoy how Giffen just shrugged and mostly ignored it and ran with her.
>>78165577
What the fuck is happening in this comic
>>78165577
That is the smartest fucking guard in history
>>78165561
>Upon the priests exile, they took the Cotati with them to inhabit every living world they would encounter, among them Earth and the planet Tamal, what would become the new home for the plant-species. The greatest impact they had on Earth was the fulfillment of a prophecy. A prophecy that foresaw the union of the perfect human with the perfect plant, the result of that being the perfect child, the Celestial Messiah. The perfect human was the Celestial Madonna named Mantis, while the perfect plant was the Elder Cotati, who inhabited the dead body of Swordsman. They held a double-marriage together with Vision and the Scarlet Witch, which was officiated by Immortus. The child (Sequioa or Quoi) was first raised on Earth and later on went to Tamal with his father.
Wow, this is some truly batshit material.
>>78165577
So Norman is singing some folk classic balladry here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCZLK0nqP7Y
>>78165577
This guard is a smart man
>>78165546
>first panel
Melissa, pls. You've been hanging out with Karla too much.
>last panel
Chen, pls.
Has Warren Ellis ever done a comedy series? This shit has me rolling.
>>78165577
I need a trade paperback of this book soooooo much.
>>78165577
PROMOTE THIS MAN.
>>78165629
NEXTWAVE, man.
>>78165629
You never heard of Nextwave?
>>78165561
>An alien plant that took the form of Swordsman so Mantis would be ok with fucking it.
They smoked too much weed in Marvel in the 1970's.
>>78165639
No, you need one guard who is just scared and incompetent enough to live forever.
>>78165629
>Has Warren Ellis ever done a comedy series? This shit has me rolling.
Nextwave
>>78165629
Nextwave.
>>78165629
>Has Warren Ellis ever done a comedy series
NEXTWAVE NEXTWAVE
also nice Jesus impression
>>78165673
dat freakish Songbird anatomy
>>78165673
Norman, you're such a drama queen.
>>78165673
Hoooo boy.
>a bunch of barely-functioning criminals with varying levels of psychopathy being ordered around by a man even more insane than all of them
Shit this basically IS Nextwave right now.
>>78165657
>>78165660
>>78165667
>>78165672
>>78165673
..... Okay then. Guess I should read Nextwave sometime.
THREAD NEEDS AN IMMEDIATE DOSE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xuosmf1_mKs
>>78165707
that guard banter
"the concentration camp I built him in the backyard"
>>78165663
You shut your mouth
>>78165561
Mantis' sexuality is amazing.
also she used to be moral ambiguous as fuck/kinda evil
>>78165695
>freakish
Foreshortened, you mean.
>>78165739
I wasn't talking about the foreshortening
>>78165402
It also has Kang and Frankenstein and there's a pirate too, I think.
>>78165714
I can run Nextwave some time soonish
shit, that'd be great for a holiday storytime, like Christmas evening when I am hopefully drunk and everyone is gone home
>>78165738
we read THE CROSSING
>>78165766
LAST ISSUE
then the one-shots we skipped
>>78165761
It's a Kang v Immortus v Rama-Tut story. I fucking love it. I think they got plucked outta time to defend, OG Zemo's there too
