Who /deconstruct/ here?
>Cafes are starting to sell deconstructed coffee. Yes, you heard that correctly. It is served on a paddle (of course), in three separate cups — one with espresso, one with milk and one with water. So far the reaction to the new trend has been far from positive.
>Coffee lover Jamila Rizvi posted a picture of the concoction on Facebook, sharing her disappointment. “Sorry Melbourne but no. No no no no no,” she said. “Hipsterism has gone too far when your coffee comes deconstructed. I just waited almost 20 minutes for an actual cup before realising it would not be forthcoming. I wanted a coffee. Not a science experiment. I prefer to drink my beverages out of crockery and not beakers."
http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/food/drink/melburnians-are-not-happy-with-the-latest-hipster-trend/news-story/e728d84299576174af3cc9085800b0d3
I hate this. The last time I went to a diner they served the coffee in a mug with the milk in a separate little pitcher, and they even made me extract the sugar from some kind of (edible?) paper packet. Disgraceful.
>>7734788
Are you implying you don't already /Korean bbq/?
>>7734776
Is this really any different from adding creamer and sugar packets yourself?
What a fucking non issue.
>>7734788
>>7734788
Noma does this. they let you cook a duck egg. They heat up a skillet to a precise temp then time it so the egg cooks perfectly as the steel cools. Its kindof cool.
its much more in depth than the coffee tho. The ingredients are very delicate, and the cost is only a small part of the larger tasting course.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqDaZsgR5zg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqDaZsgR5zg
>classic image.jpg
I ordered a macchiato downtown and got the same thing: coffee, foamed milk and water. I was embarrassed that I didn't know how to drink it so I googled it. No help. I figure the water is a palate cleanser.
>>7735053
Why didn't you just ask the barista...
>>7734776
Aussies are such idiots. What did you expect?
>>7735057
Because it was a fancy place downtown and I didn't want to look like some little prick from the suburbs trying to front like I know coffee
Vancouver BC btw
>>7735066
So you opted to look like a dumbass scrambling with his phone desperately trying to find out how to drink coffee while the ingredients got colder by the second? You should've just asked.
>>7735066
>Vancouver
kek. How are your chinese landlords treating you?
>>7735094
Nah I made the right call. Thanks for your input though
>>7735053
>>7735066
>>7735205
>it was a fancy place downtown
>trying to front like I know coffee
Is coffee really some fancy exotic art to you?
>I was embarrassed that I didn't know how to drink it so I googled it. No help. I figure the water is a palate cleanser.
>didn't want to look like some little prick from the suburbs
Well, congrats on achieving just what you were trying to avoid, looking like a retard pretending to understand things they don't.
>nah I totally made the right move and looked cool trying to google how to drink coffee and using the water as a palate cleanser
LOL
O
L
>>7734776
That's not a deconstruction, that's optional add ins so you can make your espresso-based drink how you like it, be it late, macchiato, cappuccino, americano, etc. If it were a deconstruction then drinking the hot water would be part of the intent
It's stupid though you should be able to tell the barista what you want and have them make it right. This drink could be a colossal waste of steamed milk
>>7734849
im not opposed to a cook my own meal restaurant as long as they manage to come up with a fast meal with exotic ingridients i wouldnt be able to obtain and have a chef supervising
But a fucking fried egg?
>>7735063
What the FUCK m8.
DELETE THIS
>>7736293
>>7734776
>Melbourne
>>7734776
Nah, I prefer my coffee pre-processed. The trick is that you order it a few hours in advance, and the barista drinks it for you. Then you show up at your appointment time, and you drink it from the barista. It's cooled to body temperature, and there's none of those pesky calories in it.
>>7736416
Do you drink it straight from the tap?
>ask for french fries
>get a spud and some white cloth
>>7736430
Is there any other way to do it?
I mean, I saw one guy ask for a glass, and got a bunch of crushed glass. 'Pre-processed' apparently means pre-recycled.
>>7736298
what does this mean
>>7736273
This, that's why they're in glasses with a pour spout.
I guess it makes sense, people can be picky about how they like their coffee. Seems like you'll end up wasting a lot of milk though. It's kind of gimmicky.
>>7738633
looks like an image from a danish /pol/esmoker
The real problem is that they offer adding milk or water at all
>>7734776
Is this like that faggot shit where you go to a "restaurant" and pay more money to cook your own food for a "novelty time?"
Jesus fucking Christ I am glad I decided to just cook my own food all the time.
>>7734785
Kek
I don't get all this hipster hate. If you don't like it, think it's overpriced, or the concept is stupid, then just don't go there.
>>7734818
At least it guarantees it's your hands squeezing it than some pimply acne ridden teenager working part time who doesn't wash his hands after using the loo and his grimy, sweaty hands get covered in the juice and pulp as they squeeze it down...
>>7739832
Wait, wait
Those things actually exist?
That defies the entire fucking point of going to a restaurant
>>7735066
"There aren't dumb questions
Only dumbs who don't ask"
Didn't teach it that phrase at school nigga?
>>7740384
>is the sun hot?
Dumb question
>is water wet?
Dumb question
>>7738645
>being picky about drinking a simple coffee
You can make it at home if you don't like buying it from locals
Even yet, we have vacuum flask for that
>>7740206
This comment pretty much sums up the whole thread.
>>7740394
>oh they serve me 3 glases with milk, coffee and water each one, what im suppouse to do, I never experience something like this in my entire life
>oh I know instead of asking what should I do to waitress because I actually paid for a hot beverage
>Im sure they will not have any problem doing it as a lot of people have been on the same situation and is also my right as a customer
>nah let's better be quiet like an autist and try to do it the hard way
might as well make it yourself at that point
>>7740394
If you actually bothered to figure out the answers you would realize that those aren't dumb questions
>>7736298
why doesn't the Danish backpack have a Koran and maybe IED parts?
If I was served this I'd burst into laughter and ask if they were serious. We really need to start public beatings again.
What's the water for
>>7743480
It's for fighting off hipsters who can't afford the coffee.
>>7743480
watering down the coffee if you want regular black instead of espresso
>>7734849
what do we do chef?
i don't know. how about we give them some raw ingredients, put it on a bed of hay and charge them too much?
>>7741665
Because you're confusing us with Sweden.
>>7740384
They only tell you that so they can flush out the stupid people.
Ask questions and you'll be considered too stupid to be anything more than a grunt worker your whole life. Keep your mouth shut and act like you understand, and you can work your way up to senior management.
>one with espresso, one with milk
What's the milk for?
>and one with water
Sparkling water before espresso is traditional, nothing new here.
>>7745067
It's not sparkling. Hot water, milk and espresso are the components of the main espresso-based coffees (espresso, latte and americano). The diner is obviously expected to do the mixing for herself based on her own preferences.
>>7745067
The milk is so you can make your own drink.
Maybe someone wants to have a Cortado, or just a latte. Doing it this way lets the customer customize their drink to their liking, and the only one to blame for their fuckup is them.
>>7734776
>lelbourne
