What are the worst table manners you've personally ever seen?
A parent who lets their hellspawn child run around the restaurant.
>>7718175
Was at a buffet, saw some guy blowing his nose at the table then got up to get a plate and food without washing his hands. He contaminated the entire buffet.
>>7718188
>He contaminated the entire buffet.
How? Did he put his hands in the food?
salting food before taste
>>7718190
He got spit and mucus all over the utensils that go into the food, on other plates, condiment containers... Are you being pedantic?
>>7718209
How is that different than just about everyone else at the buffet: You walk in there having touched the door handle, the tables, condiments, the menu, etc. Then you go and touch the serving utensils. They're already contaminated.
>>Are you being pedantic?
No, just wondering exactly why someone would freak out over this but somehow thinks nothing of touching the table (or whatever) and then the same serving utensils.
>saying grace
Dumb bait.
>>7718209
You need to man up and realize germs don't spread the way television commercials show, with scary green ever growing pools of disease.
>>7718218
This.
If your immune system can't handle this you're in big trouble
My biggest pet peeve is people using their smartphones at the table. It's probably the rudest thing you can possibly do other than sit there and insult the host/hostess. Then again, I consider using your phone at the table to be an insult to the host, so I guess it's the same offense.
>>7718230
I'm sorry you don't have friends or family and never get invited anywhere.
>>7718230
damnit anon now's not the time to get euphoric
>>7718175
>eating at the table
Where do you find the time? I haven't sat down at the dinner table in about 8 months now.
I witnessed some pretty fucking bad table manners from an adult a few weeks ago.
To make a long story short, the people we were dining with insisted on ordering a particular food, and when it was served, one of the men (who is way too old to act like this) took one huge bite, literally made gagging noises, FLUNG his plate on the table so hard it made a ringing noise, and said loudly "I can't eat THAT. THAT'S DISGUSTING. FUCKING NASTY"
I had no words. I just tried to get out of there as quickly as possible without people noticing I had been sitting with them.
>>7718280
It's funny because I am currently typing this on my smartphone while eating lunch in a restaurant. But I'm eating alone, so, I guess that's different, right?
>>7718292
Jesus, did any of the people you were with say anything?
>>7718292
And what did he order?
>>7718231
That's exactly how germs spread though.
>>7718288
it helps if you're not alone
>>7718292
Your story is probably made up, but then again I have a real story that's at about the same level, so who knows?
Several years back I went out to a Cambodian restaurant with a group of friends, and one of them (I don't know whose friend he was, but I had never hung out with him) started going down the menu making ching-chong noises and saying he didn't think he could eat anything here. He ended up ordering chicken nuggets and french fries off of the children's menu. The rest of us tried to encourage him to order something Cambodian, as we're sitting in a Cambodian restaurants, and we suggested relatively inoffensive dishes without thinks like prahok or kroeung, like kuy tiev, mee katang, or hell, they even had pad thai. Everybody likes pad thai. NOPE. This guy threw a fucking fit, slammed his fists down on the table and shouted, "I DON'T LIKE ORIENTAL FOOD!" The waiter was standing right the fuck next to us. We never invited that dude out again. I hope he's committed suicide by now.
>>7718310
When you're eating alone, do whatever the fuck you want. I eat alone at restaurants with some frequency, and I usually bring along a book or a crossword puzzle. It's relaxing, and I can do some people-watching while I'm at it.
>>7718317
No, everyone just pretended like it didn't happen. I think everyone was just shocked.
>>7718322
We were at a Burmese restaurant, so we had ordered several dishes for everyone to share, I think he took a bite of the Mi Gorang (which is fucking delicious).
>>7718327
I only wish it was made up, unfortunately, it's all true.
And your story IS remarkable similar, even the type of food.
People who eat with their mouths open should be reeducated forcefully. Eating with your mouth open is horribly offensive. It makes you look like some mouth breathing tard who lost sight of his wrangler. I don't care if I go over to your place and you invite me over, I will tell you to eat with your mouth closed or I'll simply leave until you're finished eating because frankly I want nothing to do with your pig like manners and sloppy noises. Disgusting. Even worse if you can actually see the food in their mouth. If you came over to my place and did that I simply would ask you to stop doing so, or I would just stop serving you food entirely.
I remember reading a story on Reddit (gasp) a few years ago where some dude went out to eat with a couple he knew. He said they pulled out their Nintendo DSes and started to play co-op while he sat there.
>>7718327
>Everybody likes pad thai.
Only time I had authentic pad thai, not some pre-packaged stuff, my bowels made had to make an extremely painful emergency evacuation. I am hesitant to try again.
Anyways, he's probably a picky eater who was getting pissed off at you guys insisting he try something when he didn't feel like it, and then it just became annoying.
Not defending what he did, though. He handled the situation like a fucking child.
>>7718338
Dude you don't know enough Asian fobs
Those fuckers will talk with their mouths full, which is some of the rudest shit i've ever seen. And yes, food flies out of their filthy mouths
>>7718338
Jesus, bro, chill. That's some serious anger. I hope those emotions stay confined to anonymous image boards.
>>7718338
>dad eats with his mouth open all the time
>ask him politely to please stop
>he starts exaggerating it and spitting food on the plate
And they wonder why I was so eager to move out.
>>7718356
Not even him but shut the fuck you rude cunt, i bet your room's a mess, i bet your toilet is full of p00 stains, i bet your kitchen is covered in n*gger grease just shut the f u c k up
>>7718351
So why go to a Cambodian restaurant if you know you won't enjoy it? He didn't have to tag along. There will always be the next time when we grab Wendy's or something.
>>7718218
I usually wash my hands before eating, but there's a difference between touching something and then touching something immediately after getting your hands covered in saliva and mucus. I think you're just trying to act like I'm OCD about germs or something, so you act like you can't tell the difference.
>>7718209
I hope you never handle money, or touch doorknobs or go out of your sanitized isolation bubble to be honest
>>7718365
Probably because his friend invited him and talked him into it. By the time he got there, he started to NOPE the fuck out and it was too late to back out.
>>7718351
I dunno what it is about that authentic stuff, i think it might be the extreme spiciness that gives you the runs
>>7718356
I'm not angry I just won't stand for that. If you did that at my home I would simply take the food I prepared for you away. I made it, if you brought your own food over thrn I'd just ask you to leave, ot stop eating until you do so, or you just stop doing it. I don't care if your culture, like the anon mentioned asians, say it's OK. I live in the west, and when you're around me or my home you will respect the cultural manners of the west or I simply won't associate myself with you.
>>7718383
I can typically handle spicy just fine. I don't know what it was that time.
I'd be up to try it again sometime, but I am in no hurry.
>>7718390
Based detective
Not
Hella ppl in this thread have manners. U dont.
>>7718345
>co-op
He felt left out because the other two socialized in the best way they knew
>>7718413
>the best way they knew
That's the spergautist way of justifying rude behavior if you ask me
Chininese people spitting out skin of apples/tomatoes.
>>7718413
That's what I find sad. I know a couple who is exactly like this, and while I love them to death, they depress the hell out of me. I mean, I've spent long periods of time in NEET life in the past, but even I know how to pay attention to the people sitting across the table from you.
>>7718394
>Hella ppl in this thread have manners. U dont.
>ppl
>u
>mfw not even enough manners to use semicolon
>mfw I have no face
>>7718434
Those are the kinds of friends you just can't do everything with. Like, you have your good dinner companions, and then your good movie night friends.
I used to be NEET too, i think that actually helps me in social situations because interacting with people was so mechanical at times that i noticed literally everything. A lot of normies have blind spots that never get fixed.
>>7718448
LOL ur just dumb dude
>>7718376
You would handle money or touch a doorknob that someone just directly sneezed on? If so, you have issues to be honest.
>>7718479
Whether someone did just sneeze on it or not doesn't matter: it's been touched by hundreds of people anyway. It's already covered in all sorts of stuff you don't want to know about.
Back in high school biology we did a project in which every student was given several sterile petri dishes. We then had to go around the school and swab the dishes, incubate them, and then try and identify the various types of bacteria we cultured. Of course we all went straight for what we thought would grow the nastiest shit: the toilet/bathroom. As it turned out, the toilet swabs didn't grow much. On the other hand, the door handles were bacteria central. So were light switches. I shudder to think at what you could culture from a restaurant menu or saltshaker.
My aunt managed to secure a table for the family on Thanksgiving in a very luxurious restaurant that you have to be in a club in order to access. Since the evening was sort of an event the meal was served buffet-style with a mock-up of a traditional family's Thanksgiving spread on one large table (but instead of one turkey there were several, as well as multiples of one dish), and not only that, but they had Asian and Japanese dishes as well, complete with a sushi bar.
Anyway, my own mother, who absolutely loves causing scenes at family events because her dumb female mind for some reason likes to cause fake memories that are to be "cherished and laughed at" scooped up a big wad of wasabi from the sushi bar and added it to her Thanksgiving plate. After several minutes of us all eating she suddenly starts sputtering and spitting and soon pukes all over her plate in front of everyone.
She then looks up and says that she mistook the Wasabi for guacamole and ate a big dollop of it. Nobody fucking believed her and nobody found it amusing. And with a big pile of vomit on the table everyone had lost their appetite. We all quickly got up and left with my aunt profusely apologizing to the hosts of the restaurant. Our family was banned from that club after that.
![1322615842122[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/txAdouB.jpg "1322615842122[1].jpg")
>>7718500
>Whether someone did just sneeze on it or not doesn't matter
>This saltshaker is already dirty, it can't be any worse even if I shove it up my ass
>>7718503
Your mom is like that dude who tries waaay too hard to epic
Which is actually funny because it's your mom
>>7718345
This happens to me literally every weekend. Myself and a group of 5 friends go out to eat, and inevitably I wind up sitting there while the rest of them play their DSes and refuse to make eye contact.
My brother (27 years old) is autistic. Whenever we go to eat as a family he does the same set of things
>Brings his own plates, knives and forks and refuses to eat unless he is allowed to use them
>Role plays as a 'gas thief' (for some reason he is obsessed with the idea of stealing gas from cars) and kneels down next to the table during the meal whilst saying 'sshhh, I am stealing their gas!' to passers by and occasionally standing and pinching food from his plate
>Only eats fish
>Only drinks half lemonade, 1/3 coke, and 1/3 bathroom tapwater that he gets himself
>puts his elbows on the table
>makes a point to read the menu in a spanish accent
>makes everyone on the table rattle their pockets in unison whenever the waitress comes with the bill
>calls his food dirt
fucking can't stand it but we always notify the restaurant beforehand
>>7718544
Sometimes you just gotta nut up and make some new friends. It took me a long time to realize that, but i don't wanna spend the rest of my life playing Settlers or Wii U or watching epically bad movies and shit.
I can't speak for you but i felt pretty trapped hanging out with my old socially retarded friends. I made new ones and i've never been happier.
>>7718547
I don't believe any of this
But if true, this would be irrefutable proof that autism is learned behavior
Do Americans actually "say grace"?
>>7718547
What does he do when he's unable to do one of these things, or someone doesn't play along?
>>7718515
That is not a fair analogy by any means. Now you're just grasping at straws to seem a bit less stupid.
You don't know if someone scratched their butthole before handling your money/saltshaker/doorknob/whatever. You're just easily impressed by a graphic depiction of an everyday event.
Like being disgusted by a cow getting murdered by a hydraulic action l hammer and later being concerned about eating beef.
>>7718547
Yeah see, contrary to what 4chan has taught you, "autism" isn't the same as "insane".
>>7718587
He starts flinging dog poo he's been gathering all week in a ziploc bag while yelling "jet fuel can't melt steel beems"
>>7718584
My family does, but only during holiday dinners, or special occasions, like when the entire extended family gets together. Not on a daily basis. It never hurts to be thankful for what you have, even if you aren't thanking God/Gods/Spaghetti Monster/Insert whatever here.
>>7718589
>That is not a fair analogy by any means. Now you're just grasping at straws to seem a bit less stupid.
Saying that sneezing on things doesn't matter because people don't have clean hands anyway was pretty stupid, I was just trying to fit in :(
>>7718602
Time to grow out of the /b/ humor, son.
>>7718606
So it's just a tradition, they don't actually mean it.
>>7718616
No, they mean it. My parents go to church on a regular basis. I don't, I'm not religious, but I don't mind giving thanks for having a nice meal and having everyone together safe and sound.
>>7718622
If you're not religious, then who are you thanking?
I lout out a loud belch at a mid-tier restaurant once. The couple behind us got quiet, and I started laughing and trying to apologize profusely in the same breath.
>>7718627
Everyone. I'm thanking my family for the awesome food, I'm thanking my sister for not being a huge bitch for once, I'm thanking the universe and the earth for existing because it's fucking beautiful.
Religious people need to believe in the Bible (or whatever religious text) to explain all the shit that happens in life, or you can believe in (literary pun intended) Life, the Universe, and Everything.
>>7718638
That's nice, I guess.
>>7718627
Not him, but my family does the same thing, and I'm basically an atheist; I just wasn't raised with religion. But whenever my extended family gets together, since they're a bit more religious, they end up praying. There's nothing wrong with praying, like anon said, they're just saying that they're thankful. I don't believe in God so for me, it's basically just taking a moment before we eat to aknowledge how great it is that we're all able to get together and have such a great meal.
>>7718613
I'm 27 years old and I'm never growing up faggot
>>7718327
>He ended up ordering chicken nuggets
>>7718668
I'm sorry for your parents
>>7718183
Why hasn't anyone else commented on this? By far one of the worst fucking transgressions you can do at a restaurant.
>>7718656
Good on you anon, that's the same way I feel. It's nice to be able to gather with family for special occasions, even though I'm not religious either I don't mind taking a minute so my relatives can be thankful before we eat.
>>7718689
Thanks but they don't need pitying from an judgemental holier than thou anonymous faggot. Get a life son.
I absolutely can't stand the sound of people eating, it sends shivers down my spine and makes me autistically rage.
I usually end up saying something but if I can't I just grimace and tense every muscle in my body whilst it happens. There is literally nothing worse than this noise. People who do it should be put in a muzzle and made to sit in the corner.
My mother is the fucking worst at dinner. She'll literally fart and burp without covering her mouth. Holy fuck it's awful. Makes me lose my appetite.
>>7718175
dad
>chewing with mouth open
>inhaling food
>inhaling in spurts with food in mouth
brother
>scooping mash of food to side of plate to slide into his mouth
other brother
>tiny chipmunk bites
>1 after another
>not just one bite and chew and swallow
>chewing with their mouth open
>slurping/inhaling their food
I can't sit with my family anymore, I go cross eyed with rage, I can't handle it
Yes I have autism but fuck you anyway
>>7718752
holy fuck my dad, sister, and mom all belch/fart without any kind of warning or embarrassment
I absolutely can never fart in front of people, and if I burp it's always subtle and away from anyone
>inb4 lol its family tho XD
NO, it's disgusting
>>7718709
Because this isn't reddit and the quality of a post is determined by it's content. Replies are not upvotes. Sage is not downvote.
>>7718849
I don't care what people do on their own time, just don't burp/fart while I'm trying to eat. Burping the way you said is fine and entirely understandable, but my mom will literally just laugh and let out a loud burp or fart. It's fucking nasty.
>>7718754
>scooping mash of food to side of plate to slide into his mouth
I do this when I'm eating alone to easily portion my bites equally because muh autism
>>7718806
>Implying
>>7718280
This.
>>7718280
Im guessing youre old because literally everyone i know uses their smartphone in some way at the table. Maybe theyre not playing angry birds or some shit but they'll check their phone or send out a few texts periodically. Then again i dont go to fancy places to eat with waiters and shit. Even at a restaurant with a waiter people check their phones once in a while, not a big deal to me...
>>7718503
I'm certain you've posted about your mum on /ck/ before
>>7718947
There's a big gulf between checking your phone now and then and just sitting there with it on the table and basically ignoring the other people you're with though.
To me it comes across as though you're telling whoever you're with that they aren't interesting enough to be worth your attention, which I find very rude.
A friend of my grandfathers who only closed his mouth while chewing to smack his lips. It's like he was raised by orangutans or something.
>>7718430
The fuck.....why?
>>7718584
I was at a friends house in high school and they did it. I played a long because I didn't want to offend them. That's the only time I've ever been witness to it. It used to be much more common maybe thirty or forty years ago. Or at least that's what I've been told.
>>7718175
Probably not that interesting, but lately I've realized that my gf's 20 year old little sister talks with her mouth full all the time. Like, not half a bite and she at least covers her mouth when she speaks, but a full fucking mouthful and she's saying whole sentences, "Mmf, momph mrrph murrph." I fucking want to strangle her every time. The worst part is her parents don't say a fucking word about it. Took me a couple years of bitching to make my gf stop chewing with her mouth open and smacking her lips, so I guess I shouldn't be that surprised. I guess as I'm getting older I'm becoming more like my dad and getting pissed off at the same shit he gets pissed off at.
>>7718231
>You need to MAN UP and be as fucking retarded as I am!
Kill yourself before you kill others.
>>7718394
>hella
>>7718325
what anon is saying is that everything is not super clean and free of germs
so when some dude blows his nose at a buffets its not like the germs are some kind of unholy corruption that spread like wild fire bringing terminal illness to everyone that comes in contact
so unless the buffet is a sterile environment and you have to wear a special suit and get a chemical wash down to enter its not germ free
>>7719116
>so when some dude blows his nose at a buffets its not like the germs are some kind of unholy corruption that spread like wild fire bringing terminal illness to everyone that comes in contact
Touching your nose or mouth and then touching other things that other people will come into contact with is how a lot of common illnesses spread. So yeah actually it is, minus the terminal part.
>>7719148
but its not like there entire restaurant was germ free before this dude blew his nose
plus your hands are recovered in germs withing seconds of washing them. now I'm not saying that you shouldn't wash your hands but saying that guy over there who just blew his nose and didn't wash him hands is gonna contaminate the entire store is retarded
>>7719169
Your nose and mouth produce more bacteria, especially since they're warm and moist environments, and are usually more likely to spread an illness than something like bacteria on your arm.
This is basic hygiene, especially for a restaurant.
>>7719186
so that dude who blew his nose should have been removed from the restaurant and his booth be purged with holy fire to prevent his vile plague from infecting everyone?
all I am saying is if you think that one guy who blew his nose and didn't was his hands ABSOLUTELY will get all his germs in all the food on all the plates and get EVERYONE sick is dumb and incorrect unless he was infecting with black plague lice
>>7718292
Literally every episode of kitchen nightmares.
People who politely refuse to eat food because they don't like it and apologize afterwards. Not because they are full, but just because they don;t like it.
My 44 year old aunt at Christmas dinner did this, she was like
>I'm sorry, I just don't like carrots. The rest of the meal is delicious though
What a big fucking baby, there's about 5 carrots max. Even if she didn't like them all she had to do was fucking grimace and stuff them in her whore mouth.
>>7719222
are you autistic
When people put food in a bowl and stick it in the middle of the fucking table which leads to a fucking free for all from uncultured retards. 3rd worlders primarily do this.
Plate it up in the kitchen and bring it out you fucking uncivilized baboons.
>>7718806
I understand that, anon. I was simply stating my disbelief. I can into the chons, no worries.
>>7718331
I don't understand people that go to sit down restaurants alone. I go to a local bar with pretty good food and sit at the bar and order wings or a sandwich and a couple beers every now and again by myself for lunch, that seems less strange to me plus if they're slow I get to talk to the bartender
>>7718335
>>7718292
>telling lies on the internet
Why would a Burmese restaurant serve Indonesian food?
The closest Burmese dish to mi goreng (with an E, not an A) is kyawkatkyikaik di, literally 'things cut with scissors and fried' IE "fried noodles." There aren't really any native Burmese fried noodle dishes besides this one.
>>7718231
the H.I.V. has progressed for you?
>>7718338
>I don't care if I go over to your place and you invite me over, I will tell you to eat with your mouth closed or I'll simply leave until you're finished eating
No you won't.
My first girlfriend's younger brother's favourite food was pouring salad cream onto a plate, making a stack of toast, slapping the toast down in the salad cream and flipping it over to coat both sides, followed by eating it with his mouth wide open and smacking his lips because he was a disgusting mouthbreather with a permanently blocked nose.
I would have been sad about breaking up with her if not for the fact it meant I'd never have to share a table with him again.
>>7718175
It's pretty easy to distinguish between people who eat with lust and people who eat for nutrients.
It's mindless crab intake most of the time for me, but at the table I make an effort to make sure I eat with meaning.
>>7718503
>women with soulful "hey aren't we all having a good time" affectations
>make food for others
>not satisfied with results
>MMMMMMMMMMMM ANON THIS IS SO GOOD BEST I'VE EVER HAD MMMMMMMMMMMMMM
STOP FUCKING PATRONIZING ME REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>7719607
>salad cream
>>7719607
>britain
>>7719624
cook good then nigga
>>7718570
>make some new friends
how?
>>7719651
>It's basically vinegared mayonnaise, and yes it's as awful as it sounds.
So, I assume you don't like Bearnaise sauce, either.
>>7718584
I say a private prayer before I eat too. My grandpa says grace too, but him and I are the only ones in the family that do it.
>>7719661
It's not remotely the same. That'd be like assuming someone doesn't like marinara because they don't like ketchup.
>>7719677
Bull-fucking-shit.
One is served cold, one is served hot, but both are made with eggs, oil, vinegar, and spices. You're a fucking dumbass.
>>7719710
Chill out, guy. It's just sauce. Don't have a coronary over it.
>>7719205
>so that dude who blew his nose should have been removed from the restaurant and his booth be purged with holy fire to prevent his vile plague from infecting everyone?
He should've washed his hands you ignoramus
>>7719710
>if you heat up salad cream you get bearnaise sauce
that's some sketti shit right there
>>7718607
Jesus christ you're faggy. I don't even disagree with your point entirely but holy shit you're a faggot. You get emotional and uppity, and when someone says you don't have a rational reason to feel that way you just respond by saying eeewww and using false analogies. You could have gone for india, where shitty hygiene is the norm, but that doesn't make it acceptable, but you decide to compare sneezing to shoving a saltshaker up your ass. Your imagery and arguments appeal to disgust rather than reason. The point still stands that you'll encounter the germs from sneezing in the air, door handles, light switches etc. that you touch every day, and you always will unless people wash every time they sneeze.
>>7718752
>I never cover my mouth when I fart
>>7719624
yourebeing a whiny baby but i know that feel
>>7718947
If I am on a date or hanging out with you as a "friend" and you are using your phone for more than a few seconds, you are cut off. End of story.
>>7718547
>Role plays as a 'gas thief' (for some reason he is obsessed with the idea of stealing gas from cars) and kneels down next to the table during the meal whilst saying 'sshhh, I am stealing their gas!' to passers by and occasionally standing and pinching food from his plate
Reminds me of a kid I used to know in high school. He'd run up and down the hallways pretending to drive a bus, moving an invisible gear shift and making loud sputtering vroom-vroom noises. I haven't seen him in years but I hope he's still driving that bus.
>>7718745
The sound of people eating really gets to me, too, for whatever reason. When it's a big gathering or we're at a restaurant, I usually can't hear it. But when I'm alone with someone and it's quiet and I can hear them chewing... Jesus Christ, it drives me nuts. Even if their mouths are closed, if I can hear them chewing it bugs the shit out of me. And I can't really say anything because technically they aren't doing anything wrong; I'm just super sensitive to those sounds.
BUT. There was a guy at my old job who would chew with his mouth open. The worst part was that whenever someone brought in snacks, he'd keep going back for more until they were gone. Augh, it makes me shudder just to remember it.
>>7718175
Loud chewing.
I can't eat with my brother in law because his chewing is so wet and disgusting.
When I've got a bag of chips or a pack of cookies or something and anyone present just helps themselves.
Like, come on, if you asked I'd almost certainly say yes, but at least have the courtesy to ask if it's okay to eat something someone else bought for themselves unless they've explicitly offered it.
>>7719222
Wow, you're an asshole.
It may be hard for you to believe, but not everyone likes the things you like. People are allowed to not like certain foods. This happens all the time at my family dinners and no one gives a shit.
>Oh, I'm sorry, I don't like carrots.
>Okay, I'll eat them for you!
>>7719950
I'm the same way. I had a roommate last summer that constantly chewed crunchy vegetables with her mouth open and I probably would have been able to hear it through a solid brick wall.
I wanted to punch her in the head so badly. The sound made me want to die.
>>7718198
god damn this. I currently work at a sushi restaurant and god damn the amount of retards (usually blacks and younger whites) that just pour soy sauce on to anything that is presented to them before smelling or tasting the food. First of all, why the fuck do you put soy on teriyaki chicken?
Some of you guys sound more annoying than the people you make fun of. Making a scene over someone having their mouth open? Bitching about phones (its 2016)?
>>7718745
>>7719950
I too have this. It started in my early twenties and it has a tendency to induce tears and shaking if it's particularly bad. It was worse in the past, when it seriously impacted my life.
>eating alone
>cancelling dates
>not showing up to family dinners
>not hanging out with friends
>being irrationally angry at my friends and housemates
It fucking sucked. I have learned ways to deal with it. Going out tends to be okay, because it's somewhat context specific. My housemates and family don't mind if we put on some music or dumb TV while we eat.
I've learned breathing and mindfulness exercises and pretty much just try to get over myself. Sometimes, still I have to abruptly leave a room.
>>7720172
HOW?
>>7718326
;_; fuck
>>7718584
Americans aren't one big homogeneous group, y'know.
>>7720251
They are though.
My mother eats and talks and then coughs. I'm shocked she hasn't choked yet. She spits food while she speaks because she tries to hold the mouthfuls in her cheeks. FUCKING ANNOYING. I literally cannot stand it and I'm fearing her sitting down to dinner and meeting my boyfriends parents one day.
>>7718198
mfw someone does this to the dinner I've cooked.
ITT: germaphobes
Can't think of any really.
What really bothers me is people unwilling to try something new, barring allergies. You have a right to not like it, and I won't grill you about it like your opinion isn't valid, but you don't have the right to not like it until you've tried it.
>>7720379
And misophonia.
>>7720379
This is one I really don't understand
like yeah, okay, don't go rolling around in literal shit
but
drinking from the same glass as someone else isn't going to kill you
eating that cookie you dropped on the floor isn't going to kill you
why do you think we even have immune systems?
>>7720381
You don't need to taste something to know that you will hate it
>>7718326
>mfw
I once saw someone in a restaurant order nothing but water for his drink. Not even mineral water or anything. Just the free tap water. I wasn't with him, thankfully.
>>7720408
Shut the fuck up yes you absolutely do
>>7720379
the human hand is generally the most bacteria ridden thing in a kitchen (usually due to people washing their hands too much)
>>7720440
that episode of catfish was fucking ridiculous
>>7718584
am dutch, am christian, so i do. it's more that there's thoughts on why praying is good/useful/nice and it's a nice time to do it, i guess. some structure. just like reading in bed with your wife or something, it's not that it needs to happen there, it's just nice to do something like that together. idk. i'm tipsy so analogy might be shit.
>>7720488
Whats wrong with water? Is it not better than a shitty fountain drink if one chooses to abstain from alcohol?
I've been to China and the men literally shovel food as fast as possible into their mouths, burp, slurp and spit cartilage and throw bones on the table and floor.
>>7720997
Me and my family do this, we just clean up afterwards.
We're there to eat, not to spend time together, chat, or have an 'experience;. It's food. We eat and then spend time together/chat somewhere more comfortable.
I don't understand people who spend fucking 3 hours around a table.
parents who let their child run up to the buffet, reach into the food with his hand, take a bite out of the food and put the rest back contaminating the whole goddamn tray.
>>7721039
Why bother eating together then?
>>7718547
Lol. U got any more stories?
>>7718175
>letting kids scream and run around restaurant
>eating before everyone has gotten their food
>reaching over plates to grab something
>looking at phone/reading/playing vidya while at table
>immediately seasoning food without trying it first
>being a dick to the wait staff
>staring at menu for the entire first part of the meal without trying to have conversation
>drinking alcohol in front of guests or friends without offering anything
>eating off the same plate
Those are all things that have happened on dates or with friends that immediately turn me off. I'm not the best at table manners myself, but there are just some things that get to me
Also, I think the #1 peeve of mine is when somebody spills something and they don't offer to help clean it up. I remember a friend accidentally dropping red wine all over the table and a few laps, and then he just threw a napkin over the spill on the table and walked away. It ruined my gf's shirt and he couldn't give a fuck.
>>7721092
I read that laughing to myself, and then I saw the lines:
>puts his elbows on the table
>makes a point to read the menu in a spanish accent
..am..am I autistic 4chan?
>>7720826
What kind of autist believes this?
I can't fucking stand raw onions, I gag when I bite into them and even the smell makes me want to leave the room. If someone offers me something with raw onions in it, I will fucking hate it. Over 26 years of occasionally giving in "oh just try it, you might like it" situations with uncomfortable to humiliating results has taught me to trust that my taste experience is actually worth something.
It's not that difficult a concept that people can tell that they won't like a thing for a specific reason.
>>7718209
he's being electively obtuse
>>7721107
Shoot, the elbow thing is acceptable enough depending on your company and how nice the place you're eating at is.
But if you actually read your menu aloud in an accent, the yes, you may have a touch of the auts.
>>7718351
>Anyways, he's probably a picky eater who was getting pissed off at you guys insisting he try something when he didn't feel like it, and then it just became annoying.
had friend with a gf who would treat us like that, pretend she was worldy and sophisticated, push us into going to some restaurant we didn't want to go, that was complete shit.
when we'd tell her we didn't want to go to some piece of shit hole in the wall, she go on the attack ...
"oh, i'm just trying to broaden your horizons anon. you have to stop being a baby. you should be more like me, etc. etc."
now she's in her 40s, still single, and tramps after anime conventions trying to pretend she's in her 20s. she gloms onto neckbeards who will pretend she's hip just to be around a warm pussy, even one that's worn out.
>>7718547
fucking lol m8
>>7718331
i bring my nintendo 3ds :)
>>7718982
i think they use harsher pesticides in china and it's generally not advisable to eat the skins of fruits
>>7718591
i think autism means "coddled asshole"
>>7718752
why would she cover her mouth to fart?
>>7718175
Some woman sat with her child in a restaurant next to us. Child was a toddler, and the mom said "Do you want the salt?" while waiting on their food, and handed it to the child, who then started nuckling on the salt shaker.
Never touched a salt shaker in a restaurant again.
>>7721239
the idea of a grown adult spending virtually all their leisure time posting nonsense on an ephemeral image board is literally fucking ridiculous.
>>7721104
>eating before everyone has gotten their food
So you're actually just supposed to sit there with a nice plate of steaming hot food just smiling and waiting for everyone to have their plates delivered?
Worst table manners or worst execution of table manners? visited a friend where we weren't allowed to speak during dinner unless adressed by a man.
>>7721256
Are you from an Islamic country by any chance?
>>7721259
no but she was
>>7721239
You'd think everyone whose parents made them eat everything they were served whether or not they liked it would grow up and say "whew, glad that's over", but this dude carries that shit, comes online and spits on people for not also forcing that unpleasantness on themselves for the rest of their lives.
Anon, you must either force yourself to eat a lot of gross shit or be blessed with an omni-tolerant palate.
>>7721310
no, the idea of guests refusing to eat the food you bought and prepared for them is rude. your parents didn't teach you very well if you refuse to eat someone's food, especially if it's common veggies and side dishes. my partner is the same way and it drives me a little nuts. don't be a manchild when you're a guest!
>>7719899
>I haven't seen him in years but I hope he's still driving that bus.
Anon that's fucking deep, hope he still drives it
>>7720997
>>7721039
man it's awkward when you're invited to dinner, are prepared for some light dinner conversation and as soon as the food gets there the hosts dig in like a pack of wild animals. just nothing but gulping and gnawing noises. then they're done eating in five minutes before you've even really started your salad, and now they're ready to leave the restaurant. i swear, this one family we know sounds like that alligator on that stupid alligator arm commercial eating the crispy duck.
then they start taking turns going to the bathroom and being really impatient waiting on you to eat.
>>7721256
how is this a bad thing?
>>7718175
When I was pretty young I went out to eat with my family. I brought my PSP with with a God of War game. While waiting for my food to come out I was fighting one of the bosses, which just so happened to be a topless female. Just as I came upon the ending quick time event where Kratos wrecks the boss, the waitress came out with the food. She came up behind me and leaned over to put my plate on the table as Kratos pulled the boss back by her hair, tits in full view, and stabbed her through the back. I'm sure the waitress saw it all.
>>7721427
Not all of us are socially inadequate.
I was at a Japanese restaurant recently and one of my co workers told us that he calls wasabi "wakasabi" because it kicks you in the head the way they say WAKAAA in kung fu movies. Needless to say the one Japanese woman at the lunch was pretty offended
>>7721437
Yes but it would only cover women.
Great grandpa. It wasn't necessarily bad table manners, but he would take his teeth out and mash together all of the food on the plate no matter what it was and eat it in a paste
Disgusting yet amusing as a child. Plus he let me look at his glass eyeball
>>7721470
>Great grandpa. It wasn't necessarily bad table manners, but he would take his teeth out and mash together all of the food on the plate no matter what it was and eat it in a paste
grandparents pulling out their false teeth and sucking the food out of them
>>7721347
I'll eat everything but the things I know I won't like, sheesh. If a host thinks I'm a manchild for disliking a particular vegetable, I'll let them.
>>7721150
Just want to point out
>when I bite into them
Meaning after you've tried them, meaning you didn't refute shit.
And on another note, tastes change, I used to be the same way about mushrooms, now I get them whenever I can.
>>7721509
...what the hell are you even saying, I'm saying that if someone offers me potato salad, I ask if it contains onions and if they say "yes" I will say "I'm sorry, I can't eat onions". Yes, I have tried them AT SOME POINT BEFORE IN MY LIFE and I hated them. So I won't eat them in in a new scenario!
>>7720381
I hate this shit. Half of my co-workers won't even try a softshell crab sandwich even though it's their fucking job as servers to know what the food tastes like to sell it to a table. I have to fucking describe that shit to them.
>>7721104
>reaching over plates to grab something
Unless you're somewhere formal there's nothing wrong with this
>staring at menu for the entire first part of the meal without trying to have conversation
Better this than that one retard who pulls an UUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHH, WHY DON'T YOU COME BACK, I STILL HAVEN'T DECIDED because they didn't bother to look at the menu and everybody gets their food 30 minutes later than necessary
I once had with a black friend of my wife and he started fingering my butt during dinner. beyond rude.
>>7721560
>this shit
I fucking hate that, I'm sorry anon.
>>7721551
That's fucking pathetic. I'm mad
>>7721448
>getting offended over a dumb joke
Most Japanese I know would think that's funny
>>7721256
so it was a pleasant and civilized meal?
>>7721592
I assume it's normal where he comes from but no, that's considered a faux pax, despite how nice my butt might be, or how skillful his fingers.
>>7718584
Oh wow, how dare people want to act a little respectful, right?
>>7721613
how is that respectful? I mean, maybe if they're saying grace for the chef.
>>7721615
When my family says grace, we thank the chef for giving us good food, then we thank God, then we just act appreciative that we're not starving in a third world country.
That's the key of it all. Whether you believe in god of not, the point is that you want to show your appreciation in some way. Kids these days don't understand or appreciate what they have, and it's turning them into selfish brats.
>>7721638
I could get behind grace, if you removed the god element.
>>7721643
Then just ignore it. the god element is the equivalent of that vegetable that you don't like eating. You don't throw away the entire dish because someone put it on your plate, you just put it to the side and enjoy the rest of it.
Does the mere presence of that vegetable sully the rest of the meal?
>>7721638
I just say thank you and tell the chef that the food was good
>>7721651
Does blatantly lying ruin a nice sentiment? yeah, kinda. I don't believe in god, and no one I know sincerely does, it seems like saying grace would be the last thing we could do to seem respectful. An appreciative thanks and compliments to the chef seem perfectly sufficient. To say grace seems like it's just disrespectful in other ways, don't enforce your own sentiments on the entire table, they can decide whether they'll be decent on their own. It makes sense with kids though.
>>7721666
I agree with satan
>>7721673
He never said he was jewish
Without reading the thread, I'm going to guess that at least 75 percent of the posts are autists complaining about shit that doesn't affect them.
>>7721448
>wakasabi
>young rust
>>7721448
>Getting offended over a fucking joke
I'm getting real sick of this shit.
>>7721150
>my experience of disliking something i have tried proves that you don't need to try something to hate it
????
>>7721776
That applies to all of 4chan
>>7719884
No, not really
>>7718744
>son
>"I'm 27 and never growing up!"
Good one
>>7720340
I'm re reading this thread and I take it back. I sound super autistic.
>>7718503
Is she ill in the head when would she do that what would make any one think it would be a good idea
(On a side note I told my brother if he ate a huge spoon full of wasabi I'd give him 20 dollars he never had it before and threw up all over )
>>7718745
Kill your self austic shit
>>7718175
>grandfather died 2 years ago
>holidays come around
>Meal time
>My family likes to torture itself by saying "As pap said, a father that prays together stays together"
>Commence long prayer
>People crying the entire time the prayer is being said
>Completely ruins the mood
>Happy Thanksgiving/Easter/Christmas Everyone!
>>7721992
????
Yes.
>>7722177
>My family likes to torture itself by saying "As pap said, a family* that prays together stays together"
>>7718175
i saw a person that would chew every single bite religiously 50+ times until it was just total paste before swallowing it
seriously would take him 40 minutes to eat a burger
>>7722177
Damn they still crying about it 2 years later?
>>7718209
*shakes head*
>>7722170
don't be so mean.
>Cook meal for a friend
>as soon as i give them the plate, before even tasting or smelling it, they squirt half a bottle of ketchup/sriracha/whatever on top
We dont hang out anymore
>>7722312
Oh and of course
>doesnt say thank you
>>7718589
>You're just easily impressed by a graphic depiction of an everyday event.
This is such a good turn of phrase and I'm not even sure why
>>7718547
>half lemonade, 1/3 coke, and 1/3 bathroom tapwater
3 sixths two sixths and two sixths.
You have set off my autism
>>7721104
I don't think those people are friends
>>7721997
Litearal translation is "I humbly receive"
>>7721239
The idea of a grown adult being unable to accept that other people have different tastes is literally fucking ridiculous.
>>7720094
I can feel my arteries clogging just imagining how much fucking salt that is.
>>7718547
>Role plays as a 'gas thief' (for some reason he is obsessed with the idea of stealing gas from cars) and kneels down next to the table during the meal whilst saying 'sshhh, I am stealing their gas!' to passers by and occasionally standing and pinching food from his plate
I don't believe you.
>puts his elbows on the table
That's not even weird. Most people do that.
>>7721150
It's endearing how consistently stupid you are anon, both in this post and in your struggle to comprehend why people replying to you are confused by the thoughts you put forth in this post
>>7718338
my dad does this. i asked him to stop and he got all indignant over it.
I absolutely hate it when people eat with their mouth open.
I know it sounds like ocd but that extends to potato chips. people who make that echoing crunch with every chip annoy the fuck out of me.
>>7718175
Took my wife out to some fancy raw food restaurant for her birthday. Not a huge place (20 tables) but fairly upscale. Bit of a wait, every table is full of people, except for one black dude eating by himself. Black dude is eating with his hands, which is fine it was like a roll type food. Finishes his plate, picks it up and begins to lick and moan the plate. Everyone in the place just stops and stares
>does this for every plate
>>7721239
maybe she was super allergic to them but didnt want to talk about it?
I cant eat wheat and i hate how every meal its like OH ANON YOU CANT EAT THAT? WHY NOT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU?
just shut the fuck up honestly.
>>7718175
>whenever I eat with someone for the first time I stop them beforehand
>let's say grace
>grace
>Now let's eat
>laugh at my own joke like a retard everytime
it's always funny
>>7722351
>3 sixths two sixths and two sixths.
ur betr then that m80
>>7722414
My girlfriend's the same way. Sometimes I feel bad about eating pizza around her.
>>7721104
you sound like such a douche
I have this Jewish-American-Princess aunt whom I see maybe twice a year if I'm unlucky, once in the summer and once around Hanukkah/Christmas.
This fucking lady doesn't work or have any hobbies and is overweight, and is always trying fad diets to lose but disguises them as a new "allergy" she just found out about so that she can inconvenience all of us. And I say inconvenience someone''s dietary needs should never stress out their hosts. I've been vegetarian since since hgh school (22 now) and have always just either cooked for myself or eaten around meat served to me. Never made a big deal out of it because someone is fucking inviting me into their home and being hospitable and nice.
Anyway, the last two times I've seen this cunt:
In the summer she claims to be gluten-free.
>acts completely offended if she is served anything with wheat in it, lectures my family about being courteous to her ""illness" constantly
>does shit like scrape cheese and sauce off pizza and slurps it off her plate, dumps the fillings out of sandwiches
Next time we see her in the winter we were ordering takeout, search internet for most gluten-free place and find a nice bbq
>Bitch comes over and tells us she eats gluten now but not meat
>we go to an Italian lace and she gets fucking shrimp and pasta
>>7718280
This shit right here.
People can't even go about eating their lunch for 10 minutes without having to look on their shitty phones all the time.
>>7722665
This happens a lot with overweight people, it's kind of sad. They want to keep stuffing themselves because it makes them feel good, and they think as long as they cut out a certain food group they'll lose weight. It's basically an addiction.
It's like how people think eating rice cakes, drinking low-fat milk or diet sodas make you lose weight. They think it's just one food making them overweight and not too much calories in general. They either believe it out of ignorance or want to believe it so they can keep stuffing themselves.
