For reasons I'd prefer not to say, I need to eat a Trinidad Chocolate Scorpion pepper in a few days from now.
I have literally almost zero experience with spicy food and no experience with peppers.
What advice can you give me to reduce pain and heat.
The peppers are in my possession. I can't do any marinating to them or anything, but I do want to best prepare for the moment when I eat them.
coat your mouth in wax and just swallow it whole
>>7597781
This
>>7597776
Buy those numbing pills that are for sore throats??
You might as well chop off a finger if you feel the need to do something pointlessly painful.
Don't chew.
Put your toilet paper in the freezer. You're doing to need it.
>>7597776
If you can, swallow without chewing. If you cannot, have milk and bread on hand. Drink some milk before you eat it.
In general- just hold on for the ride because you're gonna burn.
>>7597776
>For reasons I'd prefer not to say
So you lost a bet and you will have a burning asshole by either insertion or eating this pepper?
Don't do it. Your shit will be rekt for probably 2 days
>>7597776
You're fucked. You can do a some of the things other Anons mention but you're going to be fucked.
The best choice is just to not eat it. That's pretty simple and the only reason to actually eat it is if the life of someone you love depends upon you eating the pepper.
If you lost a bet, so what. Renege and stop being a faggot who makes stupid bets with his idiot friends because they think they're funny but they're actually just retards.
Make a fake one out of sugar, learn sleight of hand, bada bing bada boom you beta peer pressurized nincompoop.
>>7597776
sugar eliviates the pain even better then milk. You can also coat your mouth with sunflower oil that will also greatly reduce then pain.
>>7597776
Use a sharp knife to make a slit in one of the peppers and then use it to carefully remove the core and the seeds. Do this in advance.
Then when it's time to make good on your bet grab that pepper and eat it before your friends have a chance to notice that it's been doctored.
It won't remove all the heat but it will certainly help.
>>7597776
Prepare to feel like you want to die. It seems like common sense until you actually feel what it does to your entire body.
Starts off stupid hot so you swallow it thinking thats the end... no no my friend thats just the start. Your esophagus is on fire for a few minutes and stays that way, then your abdomen wants to explode, then your belly is just a shitstorm until it reaches your innocent bunghole. You might as well have a loaf of bread and a bowl of milk to dip it in and then dab your ass for a few hours. Would not recommend.
drink milk before and after, don't chew, and give yourself a milk enema. I know you think I'm trolling but i'm serious about the enema.
coat your mouth with oil before you eat it and take a couple ibuprofen so your guts dont commit suicide
>>7597781
what about psychedelic trip about finding your soul mate/johnny cash as a fox?
>>7597856
Speaking of Johnny Cash, if you eat that pepper be prepared for a burning Ring of Fire
>>7597847
You'll skip a shit ton of assbleeding. Just make sure you do a water enema first, it'll make the milk enema less gross at the end.
I'm thinking of trying a really hot pepper myself.
Would I be ok if I just tried a really small piece of it? Like a quarter of it?
I'm guessing it wouldn't be nearly as bad as eating the whole thing, along with the other suggestions like bananas and shit
>>7598028
Sure, just cut off a small piece.
And by the way, even one-quarter of one of these peppers might turbofuck you. Start with a tiny little piece--the size of an aspirin tablet.
>>7597844
fuckin lold
People are saying don't chew it, but chew it a lot! Your mouth may burn but your stomach will thank me.
>>7598061
This.
The hours of seemingly endless hell you're going to suffer, curled up in the fetal position for hours, are going to happen after it gets to your stomach and starts moving through your system. It will take longer if you swallow it whole.
>>7598078
Now, I haven't eaten whole hot peppers like this so I have no personal experience here. But I would think that swallowing it would work better. Reason being that some of the capsacin would remain inside the undigested parts of the pepper. OTOH if you chew it then you've broken down the pepper completely and released all of the capsaicin into your body. Wouldn't you rather pass it undigested, like corn in your stool? That way at least some of the capsaicin never touches your body?
>>7597776
If you have them in your possession then at least post a pic of your own peppers instead of something you found on the internet
>>7598118
Why?
Literally what difference does it make?
>>7597776
Eat a lot before. I ate a reaper on an empty stomach, and the mouth burn essay fun, but many hours later the stomach pain was unbearable
>>7598128
Well the "literal" difference that it makes is that it would be a different picture, that should be easy enough for your pee brain to figure out without having to ask.
It would also make the thread slightly more interesting.
>>7597776
The seeds contain fiber that absorbs the hot oil from the rest of the fruit. Chew the seeds well as soon as you start eating it.
>>7598078
>having this weak of a stomach
I eat ghost peppers all the time. Yes it's uncomfortable and can hurt like hell in the mouth but if you have a tough stomach and are not a pussy it'll just be some light tingling in the butthole and maybe a slight burn later.
>>7598134
They changed the definition of the word "literally" you dumb shit.
Are you literally autistic for such a small thing to bother you? Why even leave a comment over something like that?
The point of the thread isn't even the fucking picture so I don't see why you should care at all.
>>7597776
Eat something before eating the pepper and drink only a glass or two of milk after
>>7598145
A non-literal definition of the word literal. What kind of faggot would use the term in such a way?
What are you getting so butt mad for? Are you even OP?
If so just post some pics you LITERAL KEK
>>7598145
>They changed the definition of the word "literally" you dumb shit.
You still sound like a twit.
>Reasons I'd prefer not to say
oh fuck off, it's an anonymous website. you lost a fucking bet just say it
Hit yourself in the head with a hammer until you pass out. You will sleep through the spiciness and it will be a complete afterthought
You're probably going to die
>>7597776
he actually ate it the absolute madman
>>7598432
nigga dead
>>7597776
you should handle it a lot and then put your contacts in
>>7598464
Sound advice.
OP should fuck off back to le leddit then kill himself
Brush your teeth, gums, and especially tongue really well. Really scrub your tongue, it gets stuff off that will hold the capsaicin there longer and will dull your taste buds.
>>7598505
r u trying to trick OP?
prepare your anus
>>7597776
Coat your mouth with marmalade, swallow the pepper whole and then prepare your anus with petroleum jelly. don't miss any spots, get in there nice and deep like.
He could just swallow it whole, then make up an excuse to go to the toiled and vomit it so he doesn't have to bear the stomach and ass pain
>>7598740
why did you delete your message?
>>7598894
he`s obviously a reditor. He`ll probably stick it up his ass then suck his friends off and make a post on reddit about how no one likes him
>>7597844
>innocent bunghole
3rd time i've ever laughed browsing this site, nice.
>>7597831
This. Have something sugary on hand.
Ice cream sandwich maybe.
>>7597964
KEK
>>7597776
I like spicy foods quite a bit & I had a sous Chef who was growing these in his garden. He cut a piece of one for the whole kitchen to try. About an 1/8th inch
It burned for 45min straight in my mouth, my stomach & my lips. I was sweating & couldn't stop eating buttered bread.
All these people in this thread telling you how bad it's going to be & trying to prepare you for it aren't doing this pepper justice. You may even be hospitalized from eating this thing op. You don't know what pain is until you've eaten this pepper
>>7597776
when it comes time to eat, chop it up and lungsniff it (breath it in very quickly like you are doing cocaine but with your mouth). peppers do not affect the lungs. simple as that.
Dip it in Sour Cream. Guaranteed no spiciness on entry. Get butt lotion for your next bowel movement though.
>>7597964
great post
>>7597793
Cepacol. It haz benzocaine. I'm not sure if that works with spiciness, but, that's not a bad idea.
>>7597776
I ate a stupidly hot chili on a dare once and hallucinated.
Good luck.
>>7597831
I was going to say just plain old vanilla ice cream works great.
But ghost chill is are scorpions are kind of retarded to eat in the first place.
Eating is meant to be pleasurable- Scorpians are the equivalent of a two foot long black strap on which ironically will probably hurt your arse less.
>>7599744
>plain old vanilla ice cream
>plain old flavored-with-the-pod-of-a-tropical-orchid-that-was-hand-pollinated ice cream
>>7599750
Yes that's the one. Don't forget that it's chilled animals not animal titty milk either
>>7597776
I've got 10 bucks OP is doing some sort of dorm or frat initiation, or an equivalent for a group likely related to a college.
>>7599737
pls elaborate
>>7597776
if you can find one small enough to not choke you, swallow that sucker whole, it'll help minimize the heat
>>7599744
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QwyQoLtqB0s
>>7599766
>I hope that was a fart
Stay VERY well hydrated. You want to put your digestive system into Ludicrous speed for this bad boy. That means drinking at LEAST half your body weight in ounces of water EACH day before this happens.
WITH THAT BEING SAID
I also highly advise you DO NOT drink ANY water an hour before you do this. And DO NOT drink ANY more than the MINIMUM ammount water (this INCLUDES milk, and whatever other liquid someone tells you will helps) for the next 2 hours.
I KNOW that will suck, but any amount of water going into your stomach will reduce it's acidity, which will reduce its ability to destroy the pain casing chemicals.
Other than that eat very healthy, get some good fiber going with the water to make your intestines nice and fast, and TURMERIC and BLACK pepper with some healthy fats like oilve oil and chicken thighs with skin on, as these will up your bile production to help lube and coat your guts and keep them nice and protected.
And no seriously, this is why Indians (dot not feather) handle heat so easily. Their diet is turmeric+lots of oil. Obviously a certain tolerance is built up over time as well, but this is the trick.
>>7599802
Because when you fart it out it looks like you were the star of Ass Bukkake 17: Revenge of the Anal Cream Dream Team Ream
>>7598092
>thinking it won't break down in your stomach
>thinking if it didn't break down in your stomach it wouldn't just tear up your asshole
>>7597776
I ate a chocolate bhutlah once. Once.
Well, some peppers do heat and some do pain. The bhutlah was pain. Like Gom Jabbar kind of pain.
So if it's anything like the bhutlah it's going to hurt. A lot.
And you should not be looking for answers here. You uh... Should pretty much know these things. Please tell me you have actually EATEN other peppers before and you're not just diving into this.
Peppers like the bhutlah are not what you wanna pop your cherry on.
>>7600594
Truth be told though I do not like bhutlas. I do not like them, Sam I Am. I can handle eating them fine. But OH GOD WHAT MAGNIFICENT SUFFERING LATER.
Carolina reapers? I can pass those fine. They don't fuck up my insides. Normal poops. Something about those god damned ghost chilis just ruins me. I've gotten to the point where I could take one, eat it and maybe a little hiccups here and there but I take it like a boss. But later on the throne I cry like a bitch. I wish I could train my fucking asshole to be as resilient as my mouth.
>>7597776
In how many days?
If it's more than 3 days go buy a pepperspray if you don't already have one. Ask a friend to spray you or do it yourself.
Now you have a means of defense, you know what it does. You will feel normal in 2-3 days and your tolerance to pain and spicy stuff has been upgraded for life.
It's a bit like your pain resistance going up after a big wound exept it won't leave marks on you and you'll be fine days after.
>>7597776
When youre done induce vomiting.
It'll hurt coming back up, but not as bad as letting it come out naturally.
>>7597781
Underrated
https://youtu.be/e3MFCHlbgUc?t=162
>>7597776
>Scorpion pepper
>reduce pain
LOL nothing
You're going to have 2 religious experiences. The first is when you eat the pepper and the second more-profound experience will be when you use the bathroom later.
When your face goes numb, everything is gonna be alright.
Heroween should help relieve the pain but it'll fuck you up proper
>>7597776
I was once given a piece of caramel candy with some flakes of Carolina Reaper in it. Started chewing it, almost immediately it starts burning. I spit it out, burning gets worse.
At a certain point it sent the signal to my brain that makes it pump out the amount of adrenaline normally reserved for when your life is in danger. I shit you not, everyone who was with me can vouch for this, I was running like a fucking Kenyan to find some milk within minutes. I'm fairly sure I would've passed out had I not gotten it shortly after.
And that was after biting into a piece of caramel with tiny little flakes of the pepper, not even consuming it.
Enjoy the next couple of days, because that's all you have left before your life changes forever.
Self-hypnosis.
Scientologists use it to give birth silently and without drugs.
>What advice can you give me to reduce pain and heat.
buy a gun or have a noose ready
Just a story about hot thing
>be in Indianapolis for pokemon national championships
>have hot sauce drinking contest
>consume many caps of hottest sauce
>stomach starts to hurt, play it off for like 3 minute
>pain reaches like that of never before, i shattered bones and this made those feel like an ant bite
>run out of room to ice machine start swallowing ice cubes
>friends think its a joke, then see im serious
>start screaming in the hotel, running down the isles punching and kicking doors, literally lost my mind.
>throw up on carpet, it turned whtie
>start to see only darkness, figured i died.
about 10 minutes later im outside, and the amberlamps was called. On the way out my friend and some poor guy working there had to carry me out, I went lifeless and they thought I died. The paramdecis came and said "so uhhh hear there is a little hot sauce incident" and laughed and i said was good and they drove away.
When I got home I went to wingstop and ordered the really hot wings, when i took the first sniff I nearly blacked out and had to go home, was some weird hot sauce induced PTSD. Took a good while to get over it but now I can eat my spicy peppers no problem.
>>7602261
>pokemon national championship
I didn't even know autism could get so organised to make national championship.
How does that work? Is there a crowd of screaming children watching people throw cards at each other? Or is it via Gameboy? What's the price? Are there afterparties with coke and hookers for the winners? I want to know
>>7602464
Not samefagging, you can check.
I really want to know too.
It actually sounds really fun? Do they give you ranks? What is the equivalent of being a chess Grand Master?
>>7597964
10/10
>>7597776
I grow these things... it's not that bad. Get a carbonated drink, maybe Diet Coke, to go with it. Citrus also helps.
>>7597776
well you buck up, fucko
Maybe you lucked out though. You can see how fucked you are on the eating end (it'll still mess with your stomach onwards) by eating similar things beforehand.
Why might you be less fucked? Genes-- my grandma could eat a ghost pepper like it was an apple and my sister is about the same. I mean my grandma was crazy as a basket of assholes and drunk half the time and my sister is developmentally disabled but who can decipher these things?
Maybe get drunk and/or crazy first if you insist on being a pussy. Maybe by eating hot things beforehand you can get used to the pain so it's not such a shock.
>>7597776
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNaxL_O4PIU
>>7598938
Damn yo you're cool af teach me to be like you
>>7602784
>>7602464
not that guy but the way nationals and most pokemon events works is there's three age divisions, junior, senior and masters. Junior is I forget but like little kids, juniors is under 15, masters is 15+. there is a rating for your season based on how you perform at events like the ELO rating for chess but no one really gives a fuck about it and pokemon.com stopped even listing ELOs of players on their website, although you can check your own rating by going to your Play! profile. The big thing most people are worried about is how much CP you have (championship points) get enough and you qualify for worlds, the bar for day 1 worlds is like 325 or something. worlds is a lot easier to qualify for now than in the past but day 1 is pretty much the old last chance qualifier, getting a day 1 invite doesn't mean a lot. most good players are shooting for day 2 invites which means you are automatically seeded into day 2 and don't have to play day 1, drastically increasing your odds of top cutting. anyway, you just get regarded as a good player by the community after top cutting enough events, maybe winning a reg or getting top 8 at nats. the crowd for VG is mostly adults. idk about TCG I don't watch that shit. its 'via gameboy' in the sense that you play with your DS at the event but its IRL not online. the entry fee is not that much if there is one I don't think they've announced it. it is a fascinating and fun subculture and I can answer more questions about it
>>7597964
That was good
>>7603013
Hay OP? See Elmer J. Fudd there?
The crossbreed you are going to be eating is going to be about twice the heat what that ghost chili in the video is rocking.
I sure hope the frat that's making you do this lets you in.
>>7603147
Fucking loser
>>7597776
wont really matter because you're going to puke it up within 15 minutes
>>7599756
too many endorphins make your brain go funny
>>7597776
I ate a carolina reaper, and it's not the heat, it's the pain.
The stomach prep stuff in this thread sounds right, but here's some life prep.
Do it early in the day. Expect hours of radiating stomach pain, and if that's being compounded with natural fatigue it's going to be all the worse. You're not sleeping through this.
>>7597776
Fresh Tasmanian mountain pepper berries are even hotter
does this shit really cause stomach pain? a friend at school ordered a vial of capsaicin extract and was putting it on everything we ate as a prank. the pain was hell in your mouth, but I never noticed anything beyond that.
you will die
also your asshole
post aftermath or an hero
>>7598028
I've eaten a whole habanero before, chewed it up and everything. I didn't realize that they were one of the spiciest peppers on earth before they started this whole spice war, and that once you're at really spicy peppers, the spice can vary significantly from pepper to pepper, so you can't be sure how it will be.
It was one of the most miserable experiences of my life and I regularly seek out the spiciest foods I can find.
>>7603655
In my experience, I do not really get stomach pain and the booty pain isn't really as bad as they're all pretending.
