Good evening chefs!
Your secret ingredients are Cheez Wiz, quail breast, Apple Jacks, and Cashews. You have 30 minutes to prepare your first dish
Fucking hate Chopped so much
funny because those ingredients are highly viable
>>7559276
Mix a small amount of wiz with mascarpone.
Food process the apple jacks and cashews together, resulting in a salty sweet dust.
Throw out the quail and and replaced with home-made butterscotch icecream. Top with mascarpone-wiz and salty/sweet crack dust.
My first course is desert and I'm not using your quail. Fuck you Ted Alan you fucking asshole.
>>7559276
put it all in a blender and make a smoothie
Easily the worst show on food network which is quite a fucking accomplishment.
>>7559301
the fact that you think chopped is worse than cutthroat kitchen proves that your garbage opinion can be discarded out of hand
Fried quail breast stuffed with cheeze wiz, breaded with crushed cashews, all on a bed of apple jacks.
>>7559301
Same guy, I'm triggered.
They give the contestants a basket of ingredients that should never be used together and/or are so obscure that no one outside the ethnicity of the ingredients' origin would ever know what to do with it. They get 15-20 minutes to pull something out of their ass (and it usually looks like they did). Then the judges act like they're in a 3 star restaurant paying top dollar and nitpick it to hell and back, acting especially condescending as if they would have created a masterpiece under those conditions. The judges are mainly what makes that show unwatchable, even if the dishes weren't all truth-or-dare tier garbage.
>>7559321
Replace Alton with Ted Alan and it would be.
>>7559321
Cutthroat Kitchen isn't about cooking, though. It's about Alton Brown making some plebes cook in a pool full of rubber ducks, or with baby food, or any number of other things. It's about people embarrassing themselves on national television for the price of a year-old Kia.
>>7559321
Cutthroat Kitchen is actually a pretty great show if you can get over the Amerifat reality TV bullshit aspect of it. Some of the chefs on that show have some serious talent, and there is a lot of strategy involved in how the 'game' is played.
Plus it's great to watch Alton Brown genuinely enjoy being a sadistic bastard with the sabotages.
quail and cashew tartare with an apple cheese sauce like an empanada.
Wow! What a harrowing first round! Our contestants this episode sure have their opinions! Wonder what our chefs will cook up during the entree round. Chefs, in your baskets you will find the secret ingedients of:
Cole slaw, chocolate chip cookie dough, liquid smoke, and swordfish
You have 30 minutes, GO
IT'S A HOTDOG
WRAPPED IN BACON
AND DIPPED IN KETCHUP
[spoiler]SO LONG AS I LIVE AND WHEEZE NO ONE WILL LIKE AMERICAN FOOD
>>7559456
I would do some sort of fritter for the cookie dough, maybe try to make it less sweet. Make a steak out of the swordfish and spice up the coleslaw, or make spring rolls with it and the cookie dough and add the liquid smoke to the swordfish.
I dunno, something asian?
>>7559456
Pull the chocolate chips out of the cookie dough and melt a few with some toasted sesame oil, ginger, garlic, soy sauce, thai chilies, and liquid smoke to make a glaze for the swordfish steak, which I would blacken on the grill or under the broiler.
I would add in some finely chopped cucumber, garlic, red onion, cilantro, mandarin orange, and chili flakes with the coleslaw to make an asian salad, dressed with vinegar, and light sesame oil, to have as a bed for the swordfish steak.
>>7559301
>>7559321
The fact that you guys think either of these shows are the worst and not Guy Fieri's Diners, Drive-ins, and Dicks proves that you're just pretending to be contrarians to bait people. He's the biggest douchebag on food network, eats like a fat fuck and doesn't even go to any drive-ins on his show.
>>7559276
I watched literally one fucking episode
>dessert round
>the bitch judge: "yeah but i wanted a light dessert, this is too heavy :("
>"we value creativity over actual culinary skill"
>"we give the most insipid and useless advice imaginable
>>7559276
Stuff the quail breast with a mixture of cheez whiz, sauteed onions (save some of these for later) and caramelized apples. Sear hard then finish in the oven to medium. Meanwhile, crumb the apple jacks in the food processor, then re-heat the onion pan, add butter, and the crumbed apple jacks. Make a roux, then add spiced rum, then apple cider, cayenne, and nutmeg. Reduce. Roast cashews lightly.
Plate quail, sauce, then garnish with chopped roasted cashew and a sprig of rosemary.
>>7559354
But they do make pretty good dishes with the baskets, have you not seen after hours?
