My greens won't ferment. They're supposed to turn yellow and sour on its own. It's been two and a half weeks on the counter. Does anyone know why?
Just like you, they have no culture.
Add in a teaspoon of yogurt or the juice from some store bought lactofermented stuff, like Bubbies pickles or kraut
>>7533035
Thanks, do I need to start a new batch? I've kept the lid covered loosely in case it expands and causes the jar to explode. I've shut it closed for now.
>>7534491
If it hasn't fermented, then there should be a chance that it could cause food-borne illness. I can't say how high the chance is, but I would recommend throwing it out, unfortunately.
>>7534491
It's not packed in water is it? How much salt? How much vinegar?
>>7534506
Shouldn't be using vinegar at all for lacto-fermentation. One tablespoon of kosher or sea salt per cup of water and it should be fine. And use bottled or filtered water, sometimes the junk they add to treated city/municipal water can cause problems with fermentation.
>>7534506
Vinegar is used to make a non-fermented pickle. Ferments need only salt and water.
OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going. Otherwise you may have to backslop, though it's not recommended to do too often.
Also if you're using water from a chlorinated tap, then dispense the water and let it sit for a while. The chlorine will evaporate out, leaving a more hospitable climate for your little microbiotes.
![vomit[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/1CIzh1D.png "vomit[1].png")
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534732
>I R R A D I A T E T H E V A G I N A
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
Toss it and start over.
That looks like pickled mustard cabbage (jruk spey). Is that what you're making? Here's how I make mine:
Cut and wash the greens and pack them in the jar/crock.
Add water to cover keeping track of how much water you've poured.
Pour the water out into a sauce pan and add 1tbsp of white rice per cup of water and kosher or other non-iodised salt enough for a 4-5% brine. The type rice shouldn't really matter too much, but I always use sticky rice for this if you want to follow exactly. Really, the rice is just there just to provide some carbs to attract yeast and good bacteria to help the fermentation along. Attracting them early keeps bad bacteria at bay.
Boil until the rice is soft then allow to cool.
Pour through a fine sieve into the jar, mashing the rice through the mesh.
Top off with fresh-drawn water to completely submerge the greens.
Allow to sit a few days until soured to your preferences.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>>7534586
> I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
crapflooding and avatarfagging is against the rules
>>7534498
I'm with this anon. It's not worth getting sick over.
you pickled them. they are preserved.
>>7533035
Isn't it some kind of special yogurt you need? I thought it was something like Greek yogurt or something.
>>7533031
Fermentation should be basically inevitable whenever you let vegetables lying around in room temperature. It should start to happen in 12-48 hours. The only reason I can think of for them not fermenting is if there's something in the mix that inhibits fermentation, like fluoride in the water (if you used added water in the first place). What's your recipe?
>>7534586
>>7535829
Any yogurt that contains live cultures. Green yogurt always will, but most should. It will say on the package.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
posting in legendary thread
>>7534732
>Trying to rationalize the practice of rubbing vaginal secretions on food
>>7536739
It's not even a new thing...
http://www.sbs.com.au/food/article/2016/04/01/company-has-allegedly-made-beer-vaginal-yeast?cid=trending
>>7536761
Do you really think you're gonna win this argument?
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7537021
Not all bacteria is the same, and you're SURELY picking up more than just lactobacillus from the microbiota rainforest that is the cooch
>>7537063
From wiki:
"The primary colonizing bacteria of a healthy individual are of the genus Lactobacillus. Since the first description of lactobacilli by Döderlein, lactobacilli have been generally considered as the gatekeepers of the vaginal ecosystem. Lactobacilli have been shown to inhibit in vitro growth of pathogenic microorganisms, e.g. Bacteroides fragilis, Escherichia coli, Gardnerella vaginalis, Mobiluncus spp., Neisseria gonorrhoeae, Peptostreptococcus anaerobius, P. bivia and Staphylococcus aureus. It is generally accepted that this is achieved mainly through the action of lactic acid."
There are plenty of airborne molds and bacteria that can contaminate a fermentation, but the vagina functions similarly to lacto-fermented pickles
>>7536761
Without reading the article Lactobacillus bacteria form part of the vaginal microbiota as well as being a wild bacteria often used in sour beers, deliberately isolated or as a wild ferment. Probably wouldn't be an unpleasant ferment for pickled veg, though I'm not familiar with what is commonly desired.
>>7537089
It's very simple. If you use vinegar, it's going to kill the cultures. It will simply be impossible to do a ferment. Fermentation encourages beneficial cultures to compete with and thus stave off harmful cultures, while vinegar pickling uses the acidity of the vinegar to stop any cultures at all from developing.
>>7534586
I'd try them if you were hot.
it is not this thread's time to die
>>7534586
>Farm to table in a nutshell
>>7534586
Someone call NASA, my sides are in orbit
>>7534586
Do your pickled veggies end up having a similar flavor to your vag? I'm honestly curious.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
Legendary thread
>>7536942
I'm not going to try to argue it, it's a "standard" and you need to explain why it isn't fine as is.
>>7539754
Seeding pickle juice with coochy germs is definitely NOT 'standard'
>>7539939
It's been done successfully at least once, what was the problem with it being done? To set a standard / procedure you don't need to be an industry standard.
>A technical standard is an established norm or requirement in regard to technical systems.
To pickle with vagina juice you have to do X, and X turned out to work.
This is how a "requirement" works., unless you want to do the new experiments.
What about the coochy germs doesn't work?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVnuFY20st0
But seriously, it works, what is our observation, what is your experiment etc.
>>7534586
>>7534519
i like to add a teaspoon of vinegar because it often improves color. sometimes i add an oak leaf to improve crunch as well
>>7534586
>>7534586
>Otherwise you may have to backslop
I think I have to backslop
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7539957
you seem to ignore or play with the fact that most of us can tolerate vaginal flora only during sex. Even though it is the primal source of human microbiota and as lactic acid bacteria are at work in pickling processes.
Reminds me the story of a guy who had a girlfriend who used to hide food in her vagina. Clever use of one's microbiota IMHO.
>>7540456
>girlfriend who used to hide food in her vagina
Some how, some way, this thread has become even more revolting than it already was.
>>7540468
Don't you eat pussy, fag?
>>7540456
I think you should go to church more often senpai.
>>7540456
>girlfriend who used to hide food in her vagina. Clever use of one's microbiota IMHO.
What kind of food? And more importantly WHY? Are they too fucking poor to afford a refrigerator?
>>7540475
The story I remember of mentions after lunch intercourse in the restroom during a highschool excursion. The guy stated she had to remove leftovers she kept there for later snack in order to have sex. According to the guy, she reported her mother told her it was something very common in the history of mankind.
The fact is that lactic bacteria in anaerobic conditions preserve food.
ITT: hygienist white Anglo Saxon Protestants affraid of MUH GERMS, EEEW.
>>7534586
thats pretty cool, after all vaginas prevent infection by harmful bacteria by having their own good bacteria out competing potentially harmful ones this is the same way fermented foods work, pussy is kind of the original fermented food
>>7540514
pussy is amazing
>>7540526
ITT cu/ck/s that don't eat pussy
>>7534586
pls be in London
>>7534586
Nearly as good as that shit floating around pol about vaginal yeast bread
>>7534586
>FUCK
>>7534586
Gee wiz
>>7534586
This whole thread has fucked me up.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going. Otherwise you may have to backslop, though it's not recommended to do too often.
C O O C H
V E G E T A B L E S
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
What would Alton Brown do?
>>7541125
ur mom
>>7534586
> I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going
>>7534586
>white people
Smh
Epic bread.
>>7534586
>>7540989
Can i be in the screencap
Vagina cultures foods is a thing, /ck/.
http://mashable.com/2016/03/31/vagina-beer/#cBnblRxLamqp
Welcome to hell.
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going
What did she mean by this?
>>7534586
>>7534586
>OP, if you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7534586
wait. wat?
>this thread
>>7534586
>This tastes like infected vulva!!!
>Chef I...
>>7534586
>>7534732
It's not just the bacteria you want, though. Your cooch isn't particularly sterile, that's why you have an immune system.
>>7534586
>I find that touching my cooch before I work with the vegetables is sufficient to get a lacto starter culture going.
>>7542193
If vaginal flora were harmful the immune system would have to get rid of them. Any organism that couldn't do that could not possibly survive. In reality they're harmless under most circumstances, and effectively part of the immune system since their presence stops other, potentially harmful, organisms from gaining a foothold in the orifice. And since a lot of them are the same microbes that live in your mouth, on your skin, and in the air, a lot of them would end up there anyway unless you're making your lacto culture under lab conditions.
Now, if it were me, I'd take some cooch swabs and some agar plates and try to isolate the lactobacillus, but that girl's way probably isn't any more dangerous than making a sourdough starter or wild fermented beer.
>>7534586
>>7534586
Anon your vagina probably shouldn't have yeast in it. That's not normal.
>>7534586
Do you make period blood pastries too?
>>7534586
What the actual fuck
>>7534732
Nice damage control vegsturbator
>>7540475
>What kind of food?
Mostly cucmbers
>>7534586
Great use for cucumber dildos I guess. Just add water.
>>7542548
>vegsturbator
>>7542522
Lactobacillus, not yeast, is how vegetables are lactofermemted.
>>7542293
Decided to fact check myself. Turns out the agar plates wouldn't really be necessary. The main species in the vaginal microbiota of virtually all healthy women are lactofermenters.
>>7534586
>>7540456
Well that's it for my yearly visit to /ck/
>>7543482
/ck/ is probably the most well behaved boards, by 4chan standards
>>7543482
I miss watching Jeb get shit on.
>>7542048
It's a simple way of making sure there are enough lactobacteria on the vegetables going into the jar. I don't put vaginal fluids into the pickles, but it's important that there are an adequate amount of bacteria, and they're often lost due to irradiation. Once in solution, the lactobacteria easily outcompete anything that would be harmful to consume.
saved :^)
ok, time to go
>>7544914
I think they were trolling. Nobody could be that bad at humor
>>7534586
why
>>7534586
That's enough 4chan for today
>>7534586
Poasting in epic thread
toasting in epic bread
>>7534586
From the smell of it, it may have started to turn a little sour. Still hasn't turned yellow.
>>7545906
Update us with a new pic?
>>7545906
Did you put cooch juice in it?
Ground zero of a new meme, truly something to tell my kids about
just posted on /k/
