I sometimes get an old metal cane and pretend I'm 75. I also during this time EAT like I'm 75. What do old people eat?
aspic
someone posted youtube vid of an old guy burning a grilled cheese and putting flour on it about a week ago. go try to find his other videos.
>>7167707
My parents are that old. Dad has the 'beeuts and high blood pressure, so they consume little white starch, and don't salt their food very heavily. They seem to live off lean proteins (beef, pork, chicken, fish) and vegetables mostly.
They eat a lot of soup. Old people really seem to like soup.
>>7167721
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yq7_s8Y6uG8
hey don't dis the willet
>>7167777
WITNESSED
Also, eat your Necco wafers
Liverwurst, maybe thats just in Wisconsin, I'm not sure, but old people fucking love liverwurst here
>>7167707
Old people love buffets like Souplantation and go at 5pm.
All you can eat soup salad bakery and more and senior discount.
>>7167707
Tapioca pudding
Applesauce
Sugar free jello
Boiled chicken
Sugar free wafers
tapioca pudding
>>7167801
I drink lots of vodka. That cleans out my system, and even cleans my teeth (I haven’t brushed in years, and haven’t had a cavity since).
I also eat a liverwurst sandwich pretty much every day – to counterbalance the effects the vodka has on my liver. I make my sandwiches on seeded rye (because it’s the healthiest bread), with mayo (because eggs are the best protein; I use kewpie, because the msg makes it taste better), coarse mustard (good for the white blood cells), zucchini pickles (because they taste good), and a bunch of baby spinach (just for filler; it could honestly be left out).
I also eat a lot of canned fish (mostly sardines, but also the occasional fancy smoked oysters) on saltines. They give you all your essential amino acids, and provide a nice opportunity to try out various hot sauces, which are generally very low in calories, while high in flavor and immensely prodigious to healthiness.
Aside from that, I drink large amounts of water (anywhere between ice-cold to slightly chilled) every day, always through a straw, and sometimes with a lemon wedge.
To each their own, I say, but I’m just shy of 30 and am doing better than most of you.
tapioca pudding is pretty good
>>7167777
>Dad has the 'beeuts and high blood pressure
>They eat a lot of soup
Unless it's homemade there is so much sodium in soup it's not even funny. That shit is horrible and not helping your father's conditions.
tapioca
prunes
yogurt
metamucil
orange juice
beets
hard candy
tea
high fiber
soft foods
>>7167928
I love tapioca pudding. There used to be some brand that made really good tapioca pudding that I would buy at the supermarket but they either stopped making it or the store stopped carrying it. I was probably one of the only people that ever bought it. I even asked one of the kids stocking the shelves in the dairy section once what happened to it and why they didn't have it anymore and he just kind of gave me a confused look and shrugged which is about the response I expected.
>>7167707
>What do old people eat?
golden coral because home town buffet isnt up to par
>>7167707
Senior coffee from McDonald's. All day, every day. 86 cents for unlimited coffee (for dine-in, at least) is pretty hard to pass up tbqh
>>7167707
Hey you stupid sack of shit, if you were of the age where who had to live through and fight trough WW II then you'd be pretty much happy with anything if still alive you stupid sack of shit.
Just remember that you and you family isn't speaking german or japanese right now, now force. They would have lost overall.
>>7167781
He seems like a nice guy.
These people were around when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor. Show some respect.
>>7168028
>you will never live in the world where the Germans won
bread and butter pudding
>>7167707
These are folk that went through WW II, maybe further and as far as I can tell they can eat whatever they want. They deserve it. It's not for me to say what they eat.
>>7168483
Good, and I'll never be a faggit frog poster either.
A Soakie.
Acquire three pieces of white bread. Place in bowl one at a time, liberally squirting chocolate syrup (Hershey's if you aren't a heretic) between them. Cover to halfway up the second slice in milk - whole milk, mind you.
Congratulations, you made a Soakie. I lived with my grandparents until I was ten and they gave me one of these whenever I couldn't sleep. Let me assure you, the Soakie's soporific qualities are not to be underestimated. Still my favorite nighttime snack.
>>7168544
sounds like a great way to get a stomach ache at 2 in the morning
>>7168573
>even getting stomach aches in the first place
weak genes desu
Rice pudding is the dankest shit ever.
>>7168028
Please come back when you can understand English properly.
>>7167781
why do old people always save microwave dinner trays
If it was up to Omaba, he'd WW II would still be going on. He makes excuses for islamics every chance he gets, and he'd be making excuses for anyone that gives him CAIR money.
>>7168578
I didn't write that one, but what anon wrote was true. Perhaps you should come back when you can learn to follow a thread?
>>7167926
i genuinely love this pasta.
>>7168574
Sorry my body doesn't appreciate me eating processed white bread, whole milk, and sugar immediately before laying down for the night, anon. I'm sure it's my weak genes to blame.
Marie Callender's, Werthers Original, lots of soup and other stuff that comes out of a can
>>7167926
I just got gout from reading that.
old mickey mantle cards
>>7167707
Puréed coleslaw.
>>7168593
What the fuck are you talking about? I was criticizing the shit-tier language skills; I don't care who wrote it or who it was meant to reply to.
>>7167707
Old people homes usually smell like vegetables boiled to a mush and piss so I assume that's what they get.
>>7169086
>>7169130
I used to watch Barney Miller every night when I was a kid.
>>7169075
Get over yourself, you accused me of writing something that I didn't write. Deal with your mistake if you're capable.
>>7169139
I loved that show. One thing I never got was how that other guy was in inspector and the captain had to deal with his shit. I've never gotten of how NYC ranks work. Detective Captain, Detective Inspector, how does that work?
The best I can determine is that an Inspector is a captain but without a command?
>>7169130
I heard he finally died the other day. Rest in peace, gentle soul
>>7167936
>unless its homemade
what da fuck? what else would it be? fucking america I swear
>>7169159
Aye if true, he was a cool m8 and good actor.
>>7169181
I get them from histrory on USN on facebook, they post a lot of interesting things, it's official too.
>>7169181
This is the one... http://www.history.navy.mil/
>>7167707
Denny's.
>>7169202
Sambo's
>>7167936
Most definitely mom makes the soup. She's not the world's greatest cook, but she sure as fuck knows how to make soup.
>>7167926
One of the best /ck/ pastas
>>7167707
>I'm transelderly
Why are people even responding to this thread....?
oatmeal
>>7167707
I don't know if it's an old people thing or what but I've never seen anyone under 60 with fig newtons in their house.
The funny thing about official history is that obama really hates them, he can't use them to make exuses for islamic savagery.
http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/
>>7167707
>grandma lived right next door
>would go to her house cause spoiled by her
>watch whatever tv, eat whatever I wanted
>we both loved cottage cheese mixed with canned pineapple
But really my grandma was a pretty great cook. Sucks in her older age that she has no appetite or taste or really much teeth plus a restricted diet means she just lives off of oatmeal and ensure.
>>7169176
He is talking about soup rivers.
>>7169823
Cheers from /ck, mine all died off years ago. I suggest getting recipies while you still can.
>>7167936
Why would old people not cook their food themselves? Where I live, every grandma cooks her own food all the time
>>7167707
Vienna sausages and potted meat....My husbands grandparents would also batter bacon and fry it up. They ate a lot of hotdogs split open with cheese, SOS (shit on a shingle), booze and sweets. Also chicken livers and liver and onions.
cracklin oat bran, marie callenders, campbells chunky soup, anything that comes in a can, creamed corn, chicken and dumplings, liver, corn beef hash, pudding skins, warm milk, pickled eggs
Bland food with no seasoning at all. Liverwurst and roast beef. Cream of wheat. Iceburg lettuce slice on sandwiches. Canned vegetables. Candy corn. Corn of all types all the time. Boiled potatoes and boiled cabbage. Ham. Old folk fucking love ham.
>>7169086
Yes, they boil any fresh veg down to mush.
>>7167936
>Unless it's homemade
Fucking really? On /ck/ of all boards.
>stuck up cunt aunt+uncle who are "religious" and both their daughters turned out to be coalburning little skanks
>they're always jackasses to my mom because she's poor
>they leech money and bum off my other aunt who is rich but super nice
>obviously I hate their guts but it's a family function
>they're asking me what I eat because I don't have a meal plan
>say I cook my own food mostly, a lot of soup
>"like, from a can?"
>just stare at them
>heating canned soup is their idea of cooking
>they know I cook well, too, because I've always been too poor for gifts so I just cook stuff for my family
>laugh in their faces because I hate those arrogant pricks anyway, explain that I mean cooking from scratch
>check news on phone
>see an article that says the city they live in has the most cockroaches in the nation
>say it out loud for everyone (not unusual because we often discuss the news and politics.)
>they get asspained, "what, did you just look that up or something?"
>nah it was on the news
>sounds like they have cockroaches from the defensiveness
>act smug rest of night
Some people are just shit down to every facet. They also can't cook worth a shit, but act like they can. You know the wifey material threads? Like that. They offered to "cook" for my grandfather because he was ill and they happened to be staying with him so they wouldn't need a hotel...they actually heated up a can of sloppy joe mix and were raving like they were 5 star chefs. Posted on facebook and everything. They added a can of tomatoes and chiles to the can of sloppy joe and called it "sloppy jose."
>>7169954
It doesn't take much to send you off on a tangent, does it anon?
>>7167707
My Grandpa's favorite meals
As many manhattans as he can suck down while waiting for the rest of the meal to finish cooking. Garnish each one with a cherry, but don't eat it and give it to one of your grandkids. Cherries are for faggots.
Roast beef with "wine gravy"
Mashed potatoes
Brussels sprouts (slightly overcooked)
1 chocolate chip cookie, but always the biggest one on the plate
Raucous laughter at an Austin Powers movie
Chopped livah like we used to get from the kike deli on the corner
toasted baguette (we're rich now, rich people eat french food)
Chicken soup
Flan
West Lake beef soup
Shrimp fried rice
Scallion pancakes
"Real quick" gulps from his flask
Using the word "chinks" and "slant eyes" loud enough for the rest of the people in the restaurant to hear
Thin shavings of ice cold butter on saltines
6 pack of Mickey's
liver and ongyons
Meatloaf
Pot Roast
Butter Pecan Ice Cream
Pecan Sandies
Bread Pudding
Rice Pudding
Fucking banana pudding
Layer sliced bananas and vanilla wafers in a large bowl
Add sweetened whole milk flavored with vanilla extract
Let it soak up that milky sweet nectar in the fridge
Paw Paw loved the stuff
Lefse, hold the lutefisk.
Retirement old?
Coffee and all day breakfast from the local diner/cafe.
Everytime you get a burger joint you only can get pickle onion and mustard, or a variation of two or 1 of these options
People on this board are convinced Royal Dank is old people food.
I don't know why people think this is old person candy, it is amazing.
based Grandma still has these.
>>7169841
She had a stroke and couldn't remember what an egg was for a while so she doesn't remember much recipes.
>cooking a lot for thankgivings
>grandma just sitting there watching me
>just smiling
>awe
>tells me it made her year seeing me cook like that
>damn tears in my eyes
>>7171162
You are now imagining that moment when you hit a bubble on it and it slices your tongue open.
I'm old and we had standing rib roast and king crab last night. Also cottage potatoes and steamed peas. Blueberry pie for desert. Pinot noir during and vodka martinis before.
>>7171169
WHY ARE YOU REMINDING ME OF THIS EVIL?!
There are three cuts that are the worst
Paper Cuts
Grass Cuts
Strawberry Hard Candy Cuts
Op, you have way to much time on your hands to make this shit up. But I will congratulate you on a seriously cool thread.
>>7169719
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20KpRp9XnJA
They're PIG Newton's!
>>7167707
my grandparents have been eating the same kroger brand peaches and cream oatmeal for fucking ever
>>7168588
it is depression logic where throwing out a tray would be shameful and wasteful
>>7169878
eventually they get infirm and have to stick to microwaveable shit
>>7171165
At least she was smiling, it could be worse, she could be chasing you with a broomstick.
>>7169841
>always love gram grams Spanish rice tasted way better than restaurant stuff
>go off to college and never get her recipe
>she fractures her hip and cant move or cook anymore
>i never got that recipe
Where I live old guys are obsessed with eating eggs
>>7167710
Underrated post
>>7169130
>>7169139
I still occasionally watch re-runs of it, it's actually aged fairly well I think compared to a lot of shows from that time.
Also random factoid: Abe Vigoda was actually in really good physical shape when he played that part and was pretty much a health nut.
>topic at hand
My grandparents are still alive and eat relatively normally. Only thing I really associate with them is they buy the no-name brand of pretty much everything and the cheapest cuts of meat and only if it's on sale. They both grew up dirt poor, and even though they've now got a respectable amount of money (they both have military pensions plus they ran an antique business and a used book store) they're still frugal as fuck. I'm getting a chunk of that money when they die, but I legitimately wish they'd spend it on themselves.
>>7169954
You seem like an asshole.
>>7167781
>now I'm going to be straight with you, because I think you deserve it, audience. I like vegetable oil.
>I'd bath in it if my old bones could bend the necessary angles to get in a tub filled with that golden elixir.
>I like it so much, when the fine folks at Wesson offered me the chance to strangle and bury my mail-order Malaysian wife in exchange for a life-time supply of their fine product, I jumped at the chance like a Chinaman leaps at the sound of a car horn.
>I took that plunge like Hitler took France.
Old people love Steak n' Shake
>>7169954
Some publishing company should pay you to write. Seriously.
>>7168544
surely inducing diabetic shock in a child to deliberately knock it unconscious has to count as child abuse.
>>7168574
>being THIS MUCH of a sucker for shitty processed food.
Why not just direct-deposit your paychecks to some conglomerate's bank account so your organs can be spared the trouble of pretending all the nasty processed shit that the baby boomers invented is actually food?
>>7171537
#include <stdio.h>
int main(int argc, char *argv[])
{
printf("Hello!!\n");
return 0;
}
>>7171537
Why don't you fuck off? Are you one of those idiots that "occupy?" You know that we'll kick the shit out of you.
>>7171145
because the last human being to ever be named Werther was born in the 1800s.
>>7169206
you must be ancient if you remember that place
>>7171334
my mexican gram gram made awesome spanish rice too, but she got Alzheimer's Disease before I cared about cooking.
>>7169969
Your grandpa sounds like a class-A badass.
>>7171648
Niggers are stupid and funny, so I remember.
>>7167707
i work at McDonald, old people come in a lot and they fucking LOVE the filet o fish. also when they're done eating they will come up to the counter for a "sunduh"
The three Ss'.
Soups, stews, & salads.
Or you could go social security old maid tier.
Cat food & tea.
Gram always makes herself a vodka tonic and a hotdog with mayo, ketchup, mustard and relish.
Grandpa yells at gram and questions his marriage to her because "KETCHUP ON A HAMBURGER, MUSTARD ON A HOTDOG" while sucking down a Tecate.
Prunes. Old people obsess over their bm's
Mustard and pickle sandies
>>7167781
I died.
>>7167781
He seems like a nice fellow. Why does he live in squalor? Where are his children? They should move him into their home so they can take care of him. Poor old man living alone like that.
>>7175202
You been watching too many family sitcoms bro. Most old people live in misery. Either they never had kids or their kids long abandoned them.
hamburger gravy on rice
>>7171169
Never happened to me. Lick the edge twice sideways and it's too dull to do anything.
Cookies with dates and Metamucil.
>>7167926
i know its pasta but i do everything but the kewpie
Generally old people in the West eat more traditional Western food, the stuff they eat is far less spicy than what young people eat.
Some old staples:
> Beef stew.
> Turkey.
> Cold plate.
> Cottage pie.
> etc.
>>7175979
So people turn into bongs when they get old?
