I don't know what to shlick to anymore. I'm so tired of my usual stuff and of seeing and hearing about sex in general. The problem is I absolutely need to do it to relax and to fall asleep. I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong. What should I do? It's getting increasingly hard and stressful for me. Falling asleep in itself is also getting increasingly hard. It's so depressing.
>I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong.
No it's not
> I refuse to try getting into disgusting things because it's just wrong.
Is masturbating and sex really not disgusting enough already that you have to look down at even the implication of a fetish? You need to get over yourself.
Go get a vibrator or dildo or some other toy. Maybe a Hitachi wand. That or try some sleep aids, like melatonin. Oh, and maybe talk to your doctor about the stress and trouble sleeping.
Sounds like you need to take a break. Wait until the weekend (or whenever you can afford to lose some sleep) and then just quit cold turkey for a few weeks at least.
You'll probably find that your usual stuff (or even nothing but your imagination) will get you off just fine after that. Maybe don't it it so hard from there on out...
