>yesterday night, gf gets home from work
>is talking to me normally, saying she loves me, how we're gonna spend all weekend together, etc
>suddenly takes hours to reply and starts replying with one messages
>I leave it alone and go to sleep
>wake up tomorrow
>same thing still happening
>I say, "You're weird, you're talking to me normally and all of a sudden I get the single messages"
>Says she's tired
>I ask what's up, she gives me vague answers
>"Oh its just mental"
>>"Whats on your mind?"
>"Nothing, its nothing"
>Keeps being rude to me and treating me like shit
>kills the conversation
EVERY WEEK she does this. EVERY FUCKING WEEK, for three months now, at least once, she gets mad at "nothing" and then is rude to me for no reason. Holy fucking shit, this is tiring. How the fuck do I respond to this behaviour?
And to all the people who will tell me to break up, don't even post. Not every problem is grounds for ending a relationship.
>>17362485
Don't try to keep up a convo if the other person isn't interested. It's like getting a kid to play with a toy they don't like. Don't. Just let her be when she isn't keeping her side of the convo up.
Talk to her when she's normal. Tell her firmly that while you're concerned with her well-being and want to be with her through her troubles, she's being utterly selfish, unproductive and even hurtful by completely closing up when something's up. Let her know in no uncertain terms that that shit won't fly.
Seriously, just look her straight in the eye and say "I'd like to see a change." You'd be surprised, everything can be fixed in an instant.
>>17362502
That is great advice, and the word "selfish" hit me pretty hard because I feel this is a trait she has.
Our biggest fight ever happened when she cancelled a date of ours (which had been set days before) a few hours earlier to go to a party with her friends, being that they had called her that same morning. And this monday she was supposed to come sleep here, but cancelled 20 fucking minutes before the agreed time because, again, she wasn't mentally well.
I have a real anger problem and the amount of self control I have exercised in this relationship is beyond all human capabilities.
>>17362485
Man I know exactly how you feel, I've been going through the same shit for three years, but there's more to it than that. She's very pushy and demanding of me. I can't take it anymore and have decided to break up with her (tonight actually). It's going to kill me, but dealing with her belittling me, demanding me to do things I don't want too, and her constant mood swings has finally pushed me to far. It doesn't help I work 6 days a week and work 16 hour shifts for five of those days.
But back on the matter of you, I don't know man, no not every problem is grounds for breaking up and I'm a firm believer than you should always talk to your significant other and explain to them how you feel, it's not like taking care of a pet where you have to read body language, you can actually talk to a person. But I don't know, three months is a long time...do you see it getting any better?
At any rate, best of luck papi churro
>>17362485
>for three months now, at least once, she gets mad at "nothing"
Welcome to the wonderful world of women.
>>17362485
Honestly dude, you're being way needy. All this because of her texting habits? Really?
Some people don't like texting all night, every night.
Have you thought about BPD? Is she super needy and clingy then in a blink of an eye start hating you or just wanting to be alone?
>>17363491
Her texting habits do not constitute BPD unless he provides a lot more shocking examples. For example, if she texts you one minute "WHERE ARE U LOVE I MISS U?" and you response "RIGHT HERE" then she doesn't respond for 36 hours and tells you "I HATE U LEAVE ME ALONE" ... yes, possible BPD.
Falling asleep =/= BPD. OP overreacting.
>>17362516
Watch out for self-righteousness.
>>17362485
Go into anger management.
>>17362485
She's a freak
Leave
You were her hero, and now you're holding her back.
IOW: she's become interested in other dudes.
She won't dump you until she's certain she has
a sure thing to move to.
>>17363498
Falling asleep every week during 3 months? Saying that you live him then giving half assed answers?
Anyway OP, even if this isn't BPD, there seems to be a problem between both of you, if she can't open up herself to you then you need to work this out. Maybe because it's still a new relationship. Maybe not tho.
>>17362485
Don't expect people to change just because you want them to.
Realistically you have two options: suck it up and deal with it or break up with her.
Maybe she's fucking tired every week after working the whole week. Maybe you're the one with the problem here, not her.
>>17363724
It's fucking text messaging... do people need to text each other "good night I love you" ever single night before they fall asleep?
If my partner go a couple days with no message, I don't assume it's a diss. I don't ask them what's up, and I don't get half-assesd answers to my stupid question about a complete non-issue.
Solution: just text her less
The real problem: cancelling a date to see her friends short notice? Unless she only gets to see them once in a blue moon (aka foreign friend briefly in the country) this behaviour is a massive fucking red flag
Tbh if a girl I was seeing short notice ditched me for her friends I'd tell her if she pulls that again she can fuck off. Plans are plans, and it's rude to bail
>>17363786
OP is not willing to break up with his gf. Nothing is so unacceptable for him that this becomes an option.
>>17363480
this. my bf used to have this problem when we started dating. told him i'm not into having full blown conversations over text. its childish to expect someone to entertain you via text msg. grow the fuck up.
