How do you let go of the idea of romantic love?
>>17355847
Why would you let go of it?
You just need to find someone else with the same desire
My ex and I had romantic love... Unfortunately I had to move away and she couldn't uproot
>>17355853
Because there is nobody tolerable in my village with a desire for a cripplingly insecure, clinically depressed LGBT alphabet soup and I can't uproot either.
Get crushed enough times.
>>17355861
See someone for the depression
Improving your insecurities should help after that
LGBT is far less of a social issue than it has been in the past - don't blow it up too much. It's like worrying because you're black
And sure you can uproot. When I said my ex couldn't uproot, I meant she had a well established career pathway, and I didn't outweigh that (in the same way she didn't outweigh mine). It's all about weighing things up
So what's weighing you down in your village?
>>17355870
I can't get help for the depression because of the LGBT issue. According to my country's legal guidelines, one can't be allowed to transition if they have ANY mental issues at all, so I have to fake sane and could not risk letting them know the extent of my issues. Besides, I am autistic and my psychiatrist is estonian, so the language barrier is rougly the size of a lesser ocean.
Sure, these laws insult my human rights and people are campaigning against them, but it's not like those green-haired tumblr fucks are going to get anything done. Queer are second-class citizens and will always be unless euthanising us becomes an option again.
I can't uproot because the only job (and car and home) I can realistically hold without an education is here, and so is the only school I have a shot to get into. I'll be hearing whether I'm getting into school next month.
I'm not staying because I have all the world's opportunities over here. I'm staying because I have none elsewhere.
>>17355878
I suppose I'm talking as someone from the UK. Queers certainly aren't second class citizens here, in my opinion
As a medfag, I have to say that these guidelines are commonplace and there for a reason. I'd strongly recommend getting treatment for any mental health issues before transition
Anyway, back to the issue at hand - try an online dating website
>>17355895
I'm from Finland. The rest of Europe does teach english as a second language, and if these laws are reasonable, Amnesty is being wrong and unreasonable with me.
I have. 90% of the folks there are tumblrites, 60% of them are female (OkCupid automatically registers genderqueer/genderfluid/etc as both genders, and there is no "block made-up sexualities"-button), and the few rare sane gay men are only looking for hookups, are out of my league, or too far away. Or all of the above.
Embrace nihilism
>>17355906
you mean locking yourself in a basement all day playing video games repeating to yourself 'its ok, ill die anyway'
>>17355908
My sister's already doing that, mom's basement can't take two.
>>17355899
Consider not being such a rude, bitter cunt.
Some antidepressants take your sex drive 100%.
>>17355980
It's not about sex.
>>17355847
You don't have to let go. You just need to get your priorities straightened out. You are not ready for romance; that will come as you get your life in order, but that needs to happen first. Keep this in mind, and although it cannot work miracles, it will make things easier.
>>17356162
I'm workinf on it, but I keep daydreaming about having emotional support to help getting my life together. It's overtaken my daily life.
>>17356183
What does your social circle look like? It sounds like the kind of emotional support you need is more than just one person can give (which is true of most people; you're far from alone here). This is where friends are supposed to come in. How are yours?
>>17355867
this.
>>17355847
Realise that it is an impossible illusion.
The only reason why anyone would like anyone else is because they want something from them. Friendships, relationships, they are all based on needs. They are all based on fulfillment. There is no such thing as romantic love. It's label you attach to define a temporary bond with an individual. That individual in question doesn't necessarily have to feel it, nor do you. One of you if not both will be aware of the lie, of the non existence of this romantic love.
People show you every day how romantic love is non existent. When I see two love birds grasping at each other clinging onto one another as if their lives depend on each other, I see nothing but neediness. When I see people corralling with each other, I just see selfishness.
Love is fictitious. Love is used to define selfishness. Love is a mask we use every single day.
>>17356280
My friends are lovely but several of them are at the brink of collapse (one of them is on disability because of mental reasons) and they don't have resources for my bullshit.
>>17356326
How do I believe that without becoming a predatory abuser in the process?
>>17355878
>According to my country's legal guidelines, one can't be allowed to transition if they have ANY mental issues at all
Anyone else seeing the oxymoron here
>>17356382
It's an endlessly hilarious catch 22.
If you don't experiece anxiety over being trans, you are not genuinely trans and don't need to transition. But if you DO experience anxiety, you are too mentally ill to be allowed to transition.
>>17356394
Yeah you can't be an adult desiring to change his sexual appearance and not have mental issues.
>>17356419
Gender identity disorder gives me and thousands of others constant distress. The only way to cure the distress that has been found is transitioning.
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
If you've found another cure, why are you not making millions out of it?
>>17356432
Calm your tits. I didn't say anything against making whatever cosmetic change you desire.. Ain't got any alternative cures for furries or any other extreme kink/lifestyle either, doesn't mean they don't have issues.
>>17356432
>The only way to cure the distress that has been found is transitioning
Wrong. Not only is this "gender identity disorder" of yours often just a developmental phase, not only does transitioning often not do shit for the person's psychological wellbeing, but there was a drug years ago that seemed promising in curing this disorder. The only problem was, NOBODY wanted to test it out because of the "transsexual identity" meme.
>>17356548
>drug cure
Sounds like bullshit, can you show me some data on that?
Besides, when I first got turned down from transitioning, I was 17 and had been trying for three years. I gave up and tried to dress as a girl for the next four years, being fucking miserable and hating myself the whole way. Eventually I gave up and started wearing men's clothes again and seeking into treatments on adult side, and the biggest, most suicidal chunk of my anxiety FUCKING DISAPPEARED.
If you have another cure, do fucking share.
>>17356683
http://sci-hub.cc/10.3109/00048679609065010
>>17356692
>>17356692
>http://sci-hub.cc/10.3109/00048679609065010
k how do I buy that?
>>17355847
by focusing on self love and every other type of love.
>>17355861
let me guess, you are trans, MtF, and you believe that having a boyfriend would make you genuinely happy. but no one will love you, and you are going to insist that you cant ever move and are stuck this way for life.
i can tell by the way you type by your second fucking post that you're the same fucking tranny who comes here asking for advice, then insists all of our advice sucks cuz the only way to be happy is to have a boyfriend cuz that would make the rest of your life not suck.
>>17356704
What the fucking fuck does self-love even MEAN?
If I am not loved, is it not self-evident that I am not worth loving?
>>17356709
I'm ftm, and all the keys to a worthwhile life would be in my hands if only the clinic would get over their fetish of wasting my time and give me a greenlight to transitioning.
All I'm asking for is a little bit of love and emotional support. Nothing that I couldn't and wouldn't readily give back.
>>17356719
then love and support yourself.
>BUT IM NOT WORTH LOVING
then make yourself into someone worth loving.
hint: your genitalia does not define if you are loveable or not.
im gonna leave this thread. its the second time you made it and you dont listen to any advice and simply insist having a boyfriend will make you happy.
so good luck with that.
>>17356727
I'm not saying it's being trans that'd make me unlovable.
I genuinely do not know what makes someone lovable. If I did, I would have obtained it by now.
>>17356692
>I have proof
>some retarded hon 20 years ago
>>17356719
>I'm ftm, and all the keys to a worthwhile life would be in my hands if only the clinic would get over their fetish of wasting my time and give me a greenlight to transitioning.
What makes you think so? Many who transition find that it is not so simple. Many of these do, in turn, go on to become reasonably well-adjusted, but a very common hurdle is the realization that life's problems were not, in fact, all solved by a surgical procedure.
>>17356730
>i dont know instantaneously so why bother exploring it
boo fucking hoo. learn to love yourself. i didnt say magically become loveable. human development is a long journey.
maybe you should focus less on what your genitals look like and more about what your mind looks like, cuz in every thread I've seen to you, you're just a whiny cunt.
>>17356735
>some retarded hon 20 years ago
What part of "NOBODY wanted to test it out because of the "transsexual identity" meme" do you not understand?
>>17356747
I don't know if none of y'all actually read my posts or whether I'm being autistic again, but as far as I'm aware I'm typing this in english.
I don't depend on transitioning for 100% of my emotional happiness. I merely know that having it in my life would remove the stress of fighting the mental health care system in order to obtain it.
I don't depend on a relationship for 100% of my emotional happiness. I merely know that having it in my life would remove the stress of trying to find one.
I don't depend on having ANY of my problems removed for 100% of my emotional happiness. I merely know that having it in my life would remove the stress of having them.
I'm not putting all my eggs in one basket. Even if we go by the words you put into my mouth, logically speaking I'd be putting them in two.
>>17356765
have you considered letting go of romance? you say seeking it is stressful. why do you need one? its stressful enough that you whine about it, consider just not 'seeking' it.
as for transitioning, consider it as well, though i realize that is a much bigger step to take.
>>17356771
I've been needing to transition for like eight years now, but the clinic isn't sure if I'm ready to transition.
I try to let go of wanting a relationship, but it feels like trying to let go of food and sleep. It hurts like shit and I've forgotten how to even cry anymore. All I want is to feel someone's arms around me and have someone to kiss and care for. How this is an unreasobale request feels like senseless cruelty, as if some kind of a conscious entity was denying it from me out of spite.
I'd settle from buying faked affection from straight men in exchange for sex, but I can't stomach wearing women's clothes and simply appear too off-putting for any of them to bother.
>>17356789
Honey if you're too ugly for guys while wearing pants, you're too ugly anyway.
DONT
>>17356835
I did get random guys talking to me in girl clothes. Not guys that I'd like, but I do generally dislike guys that I know are trying to fuck me.
Most guys aren't into women with shaved heads and cargo pants.
>>17356876
>tries to get laid
>doesn't want to get laid
Maybe you're just a stupid slut.
