Um... whoever...?

>Back in high school this girl had a crush on me
>Kind of liked her (big tits), but preferred other girls
>She developed an eating disorder post-rejection
>She moved away, far away
>Years later guy with the same last name added me on facebook
>Thought nothing of it
>Year or so later it dawns on me
>Browse facebook photos
>Breast removal scars in pics
>Browse more stuff
>Holy shit, this guy is the girl who used to have a crush on me, but recently went through a sex change

I don't know what kind of responsibility I should or should not feel for the current state of events.

>>17352025
What do you have to do with this?

>>17352040

My rejection complicated a body image disorder (bulimia). I don't know that gender dysmorphia is a thing, but I also don't know that it isn't or what would cause it if it were.

>>17352048
Tone down your ego a bit, kiddo. The chance that you 'caused' her sex change is nil.

Seeing anime makes me more beta?

So.. I have a bad relationship with my family.
I mean I just can't talk with anyone.
When they try, I don't say anything.
When I try, they seem to be uncomfortable. It's like when you pretend laughing about something not even funny.
So, where can I start?

To girls:

if I tell a women which is interested in me that I'm a virgin at 20 years, how would the average one react?

I don't have anyone hitting on me or that I'm flirting with, but I really think that they will get really turned off if I'm sincere and say that I'm a virgin.

Better worded: How do women perceive virginity in men?

>>17352122
Read. The. O. P.
Your question is literally the first question under the FAQ, no matter how much you try to dress it up to make it sound like it's not. We're not stupid, we can see an insecurity-about-virginity question when we see it.

>>17352122
You will die as a virgin if you haven't lost your viriginity before your 20's

>>17352122
Disgust and anger

Should I get annoyed when the other person complains about their significant other? That's a normal reaction right?

For example, they talked about how their significant other hasn't done anything lately that has really annoyed them. Then on my hour long ride home (because they work as a vet tech and my animal died so it was free), they were complaining about how their significant other was whining about not spending time that day. This is fine to get annoyed at, right?

>>17352189
Depends on why you're getting annoyed. If you're just bitter that they're in a relationship, you're a fuckwit

>>17352122
>How do women perceive virginity in men?
It makes you look pathetic.

>>17352122
I'm male, but I made that experience (lost it at 22).

As the other anon said, depends.

But if you find a girl worth being with, she won't care. Whenever the topic happened to come up, most girls I know didn't/don't think it's too weird as long as you're younger than 30.

>you will never convince your husband to become a stay at home dad
>and then divorce him because you don't like it
>and then block him from access to his children
>and then force him to pay maintenence despite not working during the marriage
>http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-467390/Househusband-backlash-high-flying-wives-ditch-men-em-em-wanted-stay-home.html

Do women appreciate how easy life is for them and how they're supported every step of their life?

>>17352204
Nope. Because men have handed the world to us on a place.

>>17352208
*plate

>>17352197
I don't think that's it. I think I might have been moody because the non-releasable I was taking care of had passed away. I guess I just wasn't in the mood to listen to complaints when I had woken up to my little guy passed away next to me.

>>17352204
Nope. In fact they go through the entire thing being fed stories of how they're oppressed and discriminated against and demand they be given even more free stuff.

>>17352214
Well if you're in a bad mood, that's for you to manage. You're not right to be annoyed at her for having a conversation she'd normally have with you.

>>17352204
It's really crazy to see just what awful, awful people women are deep down.

>>17352218
I figured. Thankfully I just kept my mouth shut most of it. Or otherwise agreed with her. I just don't know what right and what's not as far as grieving goes. So I just wanted a secondary opinion in case this happens again in the future.

Thanks.

Guys do you just randomly stare at girls? Or is there something about me that I'm not aware of?

>>17352302
Only if they're very hot or very ugly.

>>17352302
I zone out and stare at people on occasion, and if an attracive woman catches my eye, i don't stare i take little peeks here and there

>>17352083
No, the fact that you're enough of a faggot to ask this of strangers online makes you beta.

>>17352302
Sometimes we stare into space. Have you considered that it might be your narcissism affecting your perception?

>>17352314
y u so mad tho

>>17352302
Sometimes we space out thinking about stuff. Sometimes we're checking you out.

An easy way to tell is if they avert eye contact when you catch them.

>>17352083
Yes, eventually you'll start running like Naruto. Seek help before it comes to this.

>>17352302
>Guys do you just randomly stare at girls? Or is there something about me that I'm not aware of?


This anon has it right
>>17352302 >Sometimes we space out thinking about stuff. Sometimes we're checking you out.
>An easy way to tell is if they avert eye contact when you catch them.


If we're just staring off in to space though, our reaction will either be to just not at all notice, and if we do notice, we'll instead shift our gaze to look right at you and smile or look away (depending on the individual/mood. Sometimes I do the first, sometimes the second).

>>17352302
We space out and stare at people unintentionally, but if you've got something going on, we won't mind helping ourselves..

File: before trump after trump.jpg (141 KB, 1279x769) Image search: [Google]

141 KB, 1279x769

Ladies, how do you feel about your man being a huge Trump supporter?

>>17352302
if there's a very good looking woman, yes I'll look. But I won't stare like a dog.

>>17352470

retarded for trusting a politician but that's humans for you

>Woman has had more than one sexual partner
>slut
>man has had more than one sexual partner
>not a slut

Explain.

I become insecure and anxious the second time I meet a girl, while I'm always great in breaking the Ice
Why? how do I resolve this?

A female friend is having a really shit life atm. LOTS of things just keep shitting on her.

What is the best way to approach this? I've been trying to distract her by keeping her mind off of everything when we hang out but she's becoming more and more reclusive or at least talking to me personally less and less though so far she hasn't blown me off whenever i ask to hang out.

Male here

Am I morally allowed to beat up a richfag who tries to steal my GF WITH money, and NOT without?

Also, any good lawyers that aren't bribed by 1% fags?

>>17352602

Not a chick, but I understand women enough and have enough female friends to say that you're approaching this as if she was a guy, but most guys and girls tend to deal with troubling things very differently.

For us guys it's about keeping your mind off of it and sorting it out in your own head.

We essentially do one of two things:

1.) We deal with it instantaneously without thinking. Instinctively act, then think later.

2.)We seek distract ourselves to prevent ourselves from feeling too overwhelmed in the moment. We basically defer dealing with it for as long as possible, then come at it as logically and cold as we can.

In both cases, essentially we minimize/avoid dealing with emotionally, and try to do it on our own.


For women: it's kind of the exact opposite.
We try to deal with things internally, alone, and minimize emotion.

They deal with things externally, communally, and almost ragging out emotion.

They cry, they get sad, they linger in it, they talk it out, they get upset, they get over it.


That's why a lot of times when guys help each other it's about keeping each other distracted or in some cases, being logical, showing tough love, and calling each other on our shit

and that's why a lot of times when girls help each other it tends to be more about being there to listen, to be sympathetic, to just makes noises and be on their side (even when they're not).

As a guy with female friends who've gone through serious shit (including my best friend, my girlfriend, and one I think of like a little sister), my role always ends up halfway being to make sympathetic noises and to try and raise their spirits by flirting/flattering/whatever, but also knowing when to call them on their shit and serving as a kind of soft-reality check--telling them I have faith, belief, and expectations that they have the power to get their shit together and deal.

Maybe this isn't necessarily true for you, but you may want to at least reconsider your approach.

>>17352684

This a good and yet unexpected answer since I thought the thread had died.

She hasn't really done any of the usual feminine things yet, maybe a bit more shouty but we haven't been friends for too long so she's probably doing that alone or to someone else.

I have given her affirmations every now and again about how she is a rational person and she has definitely overcome harder challenges in her life but I'm not sure at this point that a full blown reality check would help the situation.

I became friends with a guy who might like me and he wants to hang out later. How can I tactfully ask to invite his other housemates(I'm also friends with)? Because I'm not sure if I want to date him yet or even date anyone really. and I really don't want to be hanging out with a guy one on one, if I'm not sure

>>17353118
If it is backpedalling you can say
>i don't feel confortable hanging out with a guy one on one
It'll sound weird, but you might as well use it as a.filter.

>>17352610
No. If your girlfriend doesn't love you enough to not fuck someone else, is not this dude's fault. If she loves you and won't cheat, who cares.

My girlfriend has been acting very weird the past few days and was distant. I told her about it, how she made me feel bad. She tells me she's feeling weird.

She has problems of depression and self-harm. Told me she's always like this, that she'll hurt me. That the rest of our relationship (4 months) wasn't a lie, but that now she feelsl ike she needs to fake being happy for me to be happy.

She says she still wants to be with me, but she told me that I she'll let me decide wether to break up or not. She'll respect my decision.

Idfk what to do, I just want her to be like she was before. How can I help her? I asked her a million times if she wanted me to do something or change something about me, but she says there isnt anything I can do.

She says she wants to change, but doesnt seem like she believes she's able to.

What the fuck do I do? I don't want to break up with her, although it's true that I can find a relationship with less trouble, I don't want to just abandon her, I really really like her, and before all this it was very special

>>17353118
Bring somebody along, your friend or something
;^)

>>17353146
You can't help her if she doesn't want to help herself. It is not your role (she's responsible for her own mental health and you're not her therapist) and it will not benefit the relationship.
It's ultimately her own choice to be feeling like shit or to get better.

Support her and, if she has problems of depression and self harm, make her get professional help.

>>17353148
I would but I actually don't have friends right now that I could. they have graduated or I've outgrown them :/.actually there is 1 person I could ask to come along

>>17353130
I'll do this, just don't want to hurt his feelings but I guess it's the only option

To the females:

A. Can you really go from loving someone unconditionally to only loving them as a great friend overnight? (after a long term relationship)

B. If romantic feelings are actually lost after a long term relationship is there a sort of mental wall that goes up that makes it harder for those feelings to return?

>>17352591
Realize they're just humans too, nbd. They're criticizing themselves more than they're criticizing you.

>>17352122
It was part of the FAQ but I can say as a guy that all it takes is one positive sexual experience to turn things around, don't count yourself out and just be as quality and as charming of a person you can be to women in the first place, the rest will come

>>17353155
Will try to support her, it's just so hard when I've no idea how I can help her, and she doesn't know either.

>>17352575
https://youtu.be/7FawuGVLFQ0

Premature ejaculation.

A topic very common.

So, you can't continue after that?

You do have fingers and mouths you can put to good use as well you know. Or use the semen as lubricant or some shit.

Or try something new and exciting!

>Inb4 social laws

Dude here, how do I make myself look single?

Besides not having a ring in the heart vein fingers.

>>17352302
Not usually no.

>>17352575
>Explain.
You got the wrong door. /r9k/ is two blocks down.

Barring sex, what is the biggest difference between an incredibly close friendship and a relationship? Like what is that main factor that bridges the threshold?

>>17353559

That's a really difficult question to answer but having gone from a really close friendship into a relationship very recently, it seems so obvious.

I think it's your general body language around each other. You also go from wanting the best for them as an individual and hoping they're happy, to wanting the best for you both together and wanting to make them happy.

>>17353562
Also went from a close friendship to a relationship lately, I agree completely with this anon.

Bringing a smile to her face/making her happy became one of the most joyful things in my life. When we have sex, I'm most excited because it's an opportunity to make her feel good and loved. Getting off is nice, but it's a peripheral reward to being able to be so intimate and happy together.

>>17352122
Was in the same situation as you not too long ago.

Girl I was friends with and interested in suddenly kissed me at a party one night, and we started making out right then and there. Told her I still had my V card and hadn't ever done anything like this before then went right back to making out.

We fugged like a week later, she didn't care about me being a virgin at all and neither did I. I'd say the biggest thing is that you're not hung up on it. If you care a lot about it, your negative energy will seep over to her.

>>17353562
>>17353583
My situation is the opposite. She dumped me claiming to have lost romantic interest but we remain close partly due to some really tough stuff we went through together. She claims to not want a relationship at all with anyone but still spends a ton of time with me. Due to the circumstances I mentioned sex/sexual attraction is more than likely off the table for quite a while. What's bugging me is why she wanted it over but to have things be so close to how they were. I want to know what to fix/change about myself to fix us.

>>17353559
It's a totally different feeling, to be honest.
Don't get me wrong - my boyfriend is my best friend. We have a lot of fun together. We hang out together a lot. He's the first person I talk to whenever I need advice. He's the person I trust most.
But the intimacy we share, the way everything is about US and not about me or him, how I feel completely vulnerable but also amazingly strong when he's with me, or even just the joy that the thought of waking up next to him tomorrow morning brings to me is something that you could never experience in a friendship.
It is really us against the world, and as long as he's with me I am not scared of anything.

Why should I have one of those modern stereotypical and cliche haircuts?

Or does it matter more if I take CARE of it instead?

>>17353633

This is more what I was getting at

>>17353617

I know the difference, I just want to know how to reopen that connection when it ended for seemingly the wrong reason

>girlfriend constantly criticizes me and points out my flaws
>half the time it's just a jab for a poor reason
>we're walking and I'm slightly ahead of her carrying a bag that had food in it, she 'trips' and loses her balance but gets it back within a quarter of a second, gets slightly upset I didn't catch her in that 1/4th of a second and says I can't protect her
>I hear someone knocking on my door and my window being open from the outside, my heart races and I jump a bit but it's just her dropping by unannounced. Because I was startled by her unexpected knocking and opening my window she told me she doesn't think I can protect her and that I'd set a bad example for our children
>in a completely unrelated conversation I'll say something like "disappointed we didn't get to walk in the park together like we planned" and she responds with something like "yeah it's not a mess like your apartment"
>if I do anything to improve on anything she doesn't see it and continues to jab me
>if I get upset at anything she says she tells me I'm too sensitive and she feels like she needs to watch what she says around me
>if I ask her to tone down the near constant (10+ times a day) criticisms and insults she goes "oh so I can't speak my mind" or "oh who should I complain about you to then"

It feels like I'm CONSTANTLY under the microscope. If I don't catch her in .2 seconds when she isn't even in danger, she goes on about how I can't protect her. I have to eat to her healthy standards or else "I'll die in 20 years" or be called selfish despite her living a far worse lifestyle than I do. If I don't want to try a new food she won't stop calling me spoiled. If I get startled by something or if I'm anxious and don't want to talk to someone who doesn't speak English (and I don't speak their language) then she calls me a coward. It feels like every action I make is analyzed and used against me.

>>17353644
It takes two people to have that connection - you can't decide to reopen it if she doesn't want to. It doesn't seem like she wants to.
In my opinion she likes the reassurance of the friendship but isn't interested in you romantically anymore.

I think that having that kind of connection requires both luck and work.
You just click with some people, they give you that transcendental, mind-blowing feeling and that's just it. Mental, physical and emotional attraction. You either have it or you don't.
On the other hand, tho, even if you have that sort of connection it, it requires constant work and attention to keep it.
I try to communicate a lot, to be very open and upfront, to improve myself for him and with him and be a person he can be proud of. I also try to keep thing sexy - even if I already "have" him, I always try to flirt with him, be sexy for him, I keep myself in shape for him. Then I try to make him feel loved and do things to make his life easier.
It's something that goes both way, tho. He puts equal amount of effort and work into us. It is tiring, but always worth it.
If she didn't dump you, then I'd tell you to talk to her and work on your relationship, but to me it seems like she already choose it's not worth it.

>>17353701
Fucking harsh. We did both put in that effort. All the way up until they last day. For two fucking years. I can't let go. It tears me apart daily and it's been 3 fucking months. She was my fucking first I can't. I can't do this

>>17353659
she sounds like a bitch.

>>17353723
Then why did she break up with you?
If things were good, you would still be together. If someone wants to be with you, they don't let you go that easily.

Your best option is cutting contact and move on. It will hurt like crazy, but at the end you'll benefit from it.

I am sorry if I sound harsh.

>>17353659
Being in a relationship with someone who you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around sucks, anon :\ You can never 100% relax and be yourself around the other person. And if you can't be your genuine self in front of a person who you might end up making sweet sweet babies and growing old together with - then what's the point really? Yeah there are good times too, but does the good really outweigh the bad?

Both Genders

I won't ask where to meet people... but I'm impatient and an idiot. I've moved to a new town, I have zero contacts, and my coworkers are way too vanilla.

Is there a more graceful way to meet people than just spamming online interest groups with: "Need friends plz."? It's bad enough leaving the house to mingle with people, knowing the sole reason I'm doing it is to 'find a fucking friend'.

"Thanks for coming out! So you're interested in <this meetup group> huh?"

No. I just thought there might be someone interesting to talk to and chill with. I'm looking to emotionally and socially kidnap 3 or 4 people.

Ugh.

>>17353659
Why are you in a relationship with this person? We'll never hear her side but if that's how you feel you're only hurting yourself by not communicating your feelings about what she's doing. It's not insecure to express your boundaries. Being in a shitty situation and doing nothing about it is fucking stupid.

>>17353758
Do you have any hobbies?

>>17353737
That's the thing like literally all the way up until the last day everything was smooth we had found a perfect balance of both of us having enough space and not being too far apart. She called me to hang out and I snapped at her because I was pissed off at something that had just happened. I called her back and apologized because I felt horrible and then she did the whole it's fine but I don't want to hang now thing and then I went to bed. She called and woke me up to apologize and I didn't accept. She tried to do one of our little couple things where she'd say I'm cute and I'd say no and I didn't play along. I just asked if she actually needed something and she said no. The next day she ended it I regret that night so much I actually don't want to go on living without her at this point. We were great together we complimented each other's insecurities perfectly she made me feel important oh my God I don't want to live

Girls:

What is it about a guy that would make you cheat on your partner with him? Could you ever leave your partner for a guy you cheated with?

>>17353767

Boardgaming recently, which evolved into boardgame development. But it's been hell trying to get accepted and friendly with the local boardgamers. Conversation seems to get in the way with obsessing over pwning everyone, no matter how old they are.

Crazy weirdo spiritual shit and religious research. But people either hate your guts for entertaining such stuff, or they themselves are total psychopaths who love you on day 1, and then try to stab you over going to Walmart.

I've thought about just grabbing some normy hobbies. Rock climbing, yoga, meditation. But... truth be told, until conversation gets weird, people put me to sleep. I usually slowly turn up jokes to get people to open up... but...

Most of the promising scenarios I've had are just going to take a ton of investment. I hate spending 30 days, 6 months, a whole year trying to melt the ice with people. I feel like it would be easier just to ask random people if they want to fuck.

Friendship is a whole different monster. Most people who want to fuck, do NOT want to be friends.

>>17353773
Are you seriously considering suicide just because a girl broke up with you?
Get your shit together.
You sound very immature. If it was your first relationship, it is normal it didn't work. You will learn how to deal with your next one.

>>17353795
I already was before I met her and continued to throughout our relationship.

>>17353800
Are you doing something about it? Getting therapy or something?

>>17353807
I see a therapist but he told me I should try waiting for her for a while. I can't live without knowing what could've been - what should have been

>>17353773
Damn you messed up, bro. Not that anon that's been giving you advice, just lurking your posts, but - you snapped at her out of the blue, then brushed her off when she attempted to reach out to you. She didn't even have any reason to apologize in that situation, but she swallowed her pride and did it anyways just to try and smooth things over with you. If she's still trying to be all close to you, it's because she still loves you - because feelings that strong don't just die immediately. Maybe you should work on yourself and your hang ups before you try locking any girl down.

>>17353825
It wasn't like I verbally attacked her I was just really snippy in my tone. She did that too like I don't know anyone who doesnt have one of those days.

>>17353777

If your feelings/infatuation are stronger for the other person than your partner, your existing relationship is particularly fucked and you don't have the guts to end it.

It's a terrible thing to do and there is no excusing it, but it happens.

I met a girl about 3 months ago and we hit it off really quick. We liked playing the same sport, same team, same goals yada yada. Our downfall was how compatible we were. It all happened too quick for her and she realized she wasn't ready for a relationship. She decided to tell me all of this the night after we kissed for the first time. We spent the next three months borderline ignoring each other. Casual hi and bye when we saw each other.

Fast forward to now I see her hinting on social media that she's looking now and I almost caved in. Ended up running into her that day and she asked how I've been and I made her laugh with a joke. She ended up messaging me later that night and we ended up talking for like 3 hours. All the feelings rushed back like crazy. She admitted she thought I hated her and that's why we haven't spoke. I felt so silly. I asked her what she wanted right here and now. She says a relationship BUT she feels we moved so fast there's just no way it would have worked; and wants to begin hanging out again to build some structure and "see where it goes".

Part of me thinks its messed up she can just go be single and then admittedly tell me that she realized none of these random guys are shit compared to me; but then make me work for something we know is already deeply there..

Or is that me overreacting and I should be happy as hell? I mean this girl is a catch and I mean it in every way.

>>17353828
Right, but you weren't just snippy, because even when she tried reaching out to you and apologizing for no reason - you blew her off. So what if she was snippy sometimes, too? She wasn't snippy in that situation. You did that - are you trying to slide off some of the blame here? Like I don't get it.

>>17353945
No I just didn't want to believe it was my fault.. I understand now. I'll talk to her later tonight and make it clear that I understand and break off our friendship for a while. I feel literal infinite regret rn.

>>17353945
Oh, c'mon, that's not reason to break up if it was an isolated case...

Guys,
how would you like your gf/special someone to display affection? I don't mean sex, that's not the issue, but I'm otherwise a physically and verbally awkward person and I don't know how to subtly display to my bf that I do love him. Any tips would be much appreciated.

girls, have you ever started feeling things for a friend of yours who never interested you before? I read the FAQ and all but I can't stop hoping that one day she might develop feelings for me. It even ocurred to me once (a girl which I liked only as a friend who I wouldn't bang became my gf), but I don't know any other case

>>17353964
smile at him, hug him, kiss him. say you love him(maybe not every 5 minutes) or the easiest thing, be yourself. I think he loves you for exactly that.

Girls,
How can I improve my reputation with women? I'm afraid girls see me as a manwhore. I actually don't do one night stands and have only slept with a handful of girls, but girls like taking pictures with me and posting it all over social media, and some pics have girls licking me, grabbing me. A friend told me untagging myself looks sketchy or something. What do?

>>17353971
Can't say that I have

>>17353960
C'mon, there's no way this was an isolated case. He claims that everything was smooth until the last day. But he was allegedly 'snippy in tone' with her and she with him sometimes as he admits. There's no such thing as a perfect relationship with everyone being happy all the time. Either he's not giving the full story; or he really believed everything was fine in the sense that they swallowed their feelings whenever they hurt each other and pretended things were fine. Long term relationships don't end over nothing, anon.

I know this seems like a lot of assumptions here, but because he is not giving more backstory to any incidents prior to the events right before the break up itself, there is no choice but to guess at what ACTUALLY led up to the break up itself.

Could have been too many little arguments, could have just been a string of little incidents like this, could have been distance involved, could've just been the little things; those are normally the 'cleanest' things that make an LTR end.

>>17353990
thanks. if you dont mind answering once more, to you it's like either you like him at first sight or never more? I mean in a romantic way of course

>>17353971
There are at least 3 girls itt that did.

>>17353999
You are jumping into assumptions and judging him with them.
Don't do that, online or in real life.

Girls:

You've been dating the man of your dreams: he is loyal, handsome, charming, intelligent, kind, thoughtful, driven, and has his shit together. However, it's obvious he doesn't love you. How long do you stick around?

>>17354017

Depends on how obvious it is and how much I love him. If there's absolutely no affection or even friendship, then not for long. If there's enough "scraps" to go by, then probably for quite a while.

>>17353971
No. I know in the first few days if I want a guy or if I want him as a friend. I know that's sort of slow - other girls claim they know in the first few minutes of talking with a guy

Are girls more promiscuous than men???

I've been lifting since I was 14, I look like the type of guy who would be banging Stacy whenever I'm lean.

But I haven't. I'm a virgin and will remain so until I find my princess.

But do women hold the same value to virginity? Seems like a lot of women I speak to have had over 20 sexual partners

I wouldn't know because I'm a virgin

>>17354017
I did it once, I stayed around 6 months.
Wouldn't do it again, now.

>>17354011
If he comes out with the rest of the story including her side, then sure. As it stands, have to fill in the blanks myself. That's what happens when you get half assed stories. Both online and in real life. Do you see the rest of /adv/ giving advice only to fully detailed stories, with no bias or judgments included?

>>17354051
Some people are promiscuous.
I had one partner, most of my female friends had less than 4 partners. Then there's one who had over 15. The same happens with guys.

>>17354002
No, I probably shouldn't have answered really, I haven't had many crushes. The few I have, both male and female, weren't friends but I just someone I knew and I started to have feelings for them as soon as I knew them fairly well. Basically if I know someone well enough to be their friend I'd know them well enough to know if I was attracted romantically

>>17353917
Ladiesssss I need your perspective

>>17354033
Great friendship and small amount of affection. He treats you well and likes you well, but he just doesn't love you at all. Let's say you love him, though.

>>17354053
Under what circumstances would you try it again?

>>17354072
I see. thanks again

>>17354081
>Under what circumstances would you try it again?
None. Ever.
The guy I dated was perfect, but it hurts when you love someone insanely and they don't love you back at all. You can literally feel it. It made me feel pathetic, weak and unworthy of love.
I am grateful I moved on.

>>17354081
>He treats you well and likes you well

Under the right circumstances, a lifetime with a guy like that wouldn't be too bad. Not all love is Eros.

>>17354094
Any tips for faking it convincingly?

So I'm with my first gf for a month and its her birthday soon, any tips as to what gift I could get her at that stage of the relationship?

>>17354058
You can give advice all you want but don't fill the blanks and judge people with it, that just makes you a cunt.

>>17354117
Anything she's mentioned in your time together.
For example if walking through the city she saw a hat or shirt or accessory she liked.
A book by an author she mentioned she liked.
Something from an inside joke that is actually useful beyond the joke.
Shit like that, to build the connection between you two.

>>17353168

A. No

B. Yes

Girls, is it true that you will chase guys that you like. For instance, by making it clear that you are available, finding excuses to talk to him, etc. I've always thought that men were supposed to do the majority of the action in the relationship. But in my (limited) personal experience, that is not always the case.

>>17354224
To make it more clear, do all girls do this, or just some?

Nerdy homebody girls,
How do I be more attractive to you? I attract a lot of girls, problem is they're all basic bitches.

Is there hope for a relationship after you've been fighting nonstop?

Last fall my boyfriend and I were fighting almost constantly. We made up and decided to work on things. We're back to the constant fights over petty shit again, it's become a routine these last few weeks.

We're on the same wavelength on a lot of things (more than anyone I've met) but we have these petty fights constantly. Something in our personalities clashes. When we have them I'm completely over our relationship though obviously it's bigger than that. I don't know what to do.

>>17354239
There are 3.5 billion guys, you can probably find some dude that's on your wavelength, or moreso, and doesn't pick fights with you. What else is it about your be that you're so attached to? Some fights are healthy, but only if they help to communicate your needs and accept theirs.

>>17354267
I guess I've been listening to a lot of things about how it's normal to be unhappy in a relationship, because people have unrealistic expectations when thinking of relationships.

Girls: have you ever let a guy know that you think he is attractive even though you are uninterested in sex with him?

>>17354296
I usually don't bother bringing anything up because typically people think saying someone is attractive = you want to have sex with them. I would love telling my guy friends that they're looking great that evening or whatever but don't want to potentially give off "I want to bang you" vibes.

>>17354296
I'm a guy but girls tell me this all the time and have no interest in me sexually. Feels terrible man.

>>17354296
Yes. Like guys who are 5+ years older or women, they can have handsome beautiful features but I'd be completely uninterested in sex with them. Sexiness and beauty are different things, saying someone is attractive can simply mean that they're beautiful. But don't take this to mean she isn't interested, could be flirting, you're not going to get definitive answers here.

Girls, odd question: I'm white, my girlfriend is black. How should I go about introducing her? My parents are fine with people that don't act like hoodrats but dating would probably upset them, and the rest of my family are racist.

Anyone who has had a partner of another race pls respond.

>>17353917
What? Sounds like going too fast scared her off, and you're asking why she doesn't jump right back in to going fast.

Going fast makes her anxious. So she's going slow this time. It's not about "making you work for something." It's about not rushing into it so she doesn't freak out again.

>>17354231
Some. There really isn't a hivemind on dating.

Because
>I've always thought that men were supposed to do the majority of the action in the relationship
Some women think that too. It is a THOUGHT that you act on rather than a rule of how genders act. Men don't ALWAYS chase girls they like either.

>>17352302
sometimes
>>17353118
just cancel if you don't want to one-on-one it
>>17353404
some just fall out of the mood after cumming
>>17353758
start doing hobby shit, go to a wine tasting event, if you're a churchfag try doing their fellowship events
>>17353964
hugs and kisses
>anal

Girls: Cancelling a date on the last minute. I was having a good conversation with a girl. Got her number, we exchanged fun, flirty texts for about week for about a week. But on the day of the date, she cancelled on me like an hour before. Thing is, this is the second time this has happened. Different girl too. Is this some sort of test, or am simply reading more interest than there is?

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Is this a thing or am I kind of crazy? I'm a dude btw.

So basically, every 'fling' I've had with a girl has gone like this.
Meet girl, hang out, go out with, usually seems to be me making the effort. I'm the one who texts, makes dates, makes time to see her and stuff and I think about maybe dating her for real or a relationship. As soon as the girl becomes interested in me back I start to get anxious and lose interest in the idea of a relationship and with her.
I think I just like the chase. Is this psychopath tier?

This just happened with me and a long time fwb. I kind of developed feelings for her and I made this known to her in the winter. She was kind of taken aback by it so I said you know what forget it, let's just keep going the way things are.
This past weekend she stayed over at my place almost the whole time, and we had a bunch of sex and stuff, and she was cuddling with me (never used to do this), wanting to hold my hand and stuff, hugged me good bye (it was never like this, more like platonic relationship except sex)
Now I feel really awkward about it, and I haven't been texting or called her this week, and when she starts a texting convo I usually cut it short.

>>17354656
curious about this too.

i've talked to three girls in the past five years, about eight or nine planned dates in total, every one cancelled at the last minute.

safe to say i've given up

>>17354802
>talks to 3 girls
>gets 8 dates
That's impressive, unless 5 were men.

>>17354810
the dates never happened though, so who gives a shit?

they all cancelled at the last minute/postponed the shit until a later time, only to be cancelled by the last minute again and/or rain-checked.

three different girls
about eight dates cancelled

that's not impressive, that's terrible fucking luck.

>>17354820
Ooooooooooh
You were suposed to be on a date 8 times, with 3 different girls but they canceled?
I read it as you went on a date with 3 girls and 8 other girls cancelled on you so i made that joke.

>>17354825
>date 8 times, with 3 different girls but they canceled?
i can't tell if you're making another joke now

girl 1
>first date cancelled
>next date cancelled again
few years later
girl 2
>family emergency, date cancelled
>babysitting bullshit, date cancelled
>ANOTHER family emergency, date cancelled
one year later
girl 3
>don't even remember what, but date cancelled
>some work shit, date cancelled
>don't remember, date cancelled

>>17354836
That's what i was talking about.
I feel your pain, anon.

Why thosnt she text back

Am I in the wrong here or is my girlfriend just spoiled?

>Girlfriend is starving
>I ask if she wants to order some food
>No
>I offer to buy and bring her some food (she lives in another apartment)
>suggest some bananas, peppers, bread, but they're only suggestions
>can't buy meat at the only store open
>she says no saying she wants a full meal (with meat, which I can't buy)
>I call her spoiled in a jokingish way
>she gets mad at me, says I'm 'humiliating' and mocking her for offering the food I did
>calls me cruel and shameful
>all because I offered to buy her some fruits and vegetables

>>17354953
Is she fat

>>17354953
she sounds fat
>>17354991

>>17353559
I kind of think of it like a partnership, versus mutually beneficial agreements. In a friendship I hang out with the person because I like their company but they have no reasonable expectation to demand anything out of me. I may go out of my way for them, but that's purely out of my own good will. If I want to go on a vacation in Hong Kong for a month I have no real obligation towards them unless we made other prior arrangements.

In a relationship you should talk to them before you do anything like that, because they instead can expect certain things from you. Once the relationship becomes serious, you guys are talking about building a life together. You become accountable to that person unlike in a normal friendship.

>>17353960
It's completely unreasonable to assume it was an isolated cause. If their relationship was so strong being grumpy on one day would have been nothing. The man has already admitted he was mentally ill long before the relationship began and the relationship didn't exactly strike me as healthy.

>>17353964
My love language is touch. Others are different. To echo a common sentiment, talk to your individual partner about it.

>>17352575
Your example is rather exaggerated. Past that, the simple fact is casual sex is easy for a woman to get but difficult for a man. This often reduces the stigma for men because of the assumption they're desirable, but hints that the woman has extremely low standards. Low standards often accompany low self esteem and self worth.

Double standards are a thing. Men and women both benefit and are penalized with certain ones. Ignore them or work around them, it's up to you. Whining about it is just annoying.

if you are a guy who likes a girl and that girl have a friend who secret love this guy, how this guy should approuch that girl that he like without hurts the another girl?

>>17354836
That's what I'm talking about. Though from your examples, it seems they simply lost interest. The second girl, I eventually managed to get dates with both of them, though both ended up going no where. That's what makes me think it's a test. Did you come across as needy/resentful when getting those other dates?

>>17355045
was a couple years ago, but IIRC not really. they wouldn't just plain cancel but they'd suggest "some other time" or something similar. i'd act understanding and shit with whatever excuse they gave me.

ultimately i just stopped talking to them. one, because of the constant cancellations. two, i just hate fucking texting/messaging people. even with friends i'll put off a conversation until we're together, in-person. messaging is just so fucking dead-pan and boring, where an actual in-person conversation is much more lively and easier

which sucks, because that's all this fucking generation is about. social media for quick hookups and fucking, and texting/messaging behind some fucking screen 24/7. neither things i want.

>>17354991
>>17354993
No, she's skinny.

>>17355075
Idk brah are there any girls left in this thread, I would love to hear their input on this.

So there's a girl that works at my campuses bookstore as a cashier. She's very cute and every time I go there I always end up with her as my cashier. She always remembers me and smiles a lot, and today she did something kinda cute, where she didn't notice me, then was like "oh hehe" and giggled and rang me up.

Now, I'm not saying she likes me or anything like that, for all I know she's just being a nice friendly cashier. but how should I go about introducing myself or whatever to a cashier? I don't like bugging people at their work, but a lot of times it's only me and her so it wouldn't be too weird or awkward putting her on the spot, since no one else would be around.

Anyone have advice on what course of action I should take with a cashier?

>>17355185
Go to the bookstore, get a book, any book. Make small talk, and during the course of ask her if she would like to get together sometime. It's not fucking rocket science. The worst she can is say no. Also read the OP.

Directed to the women. I have a beard to hide my fat chin. I shave the side burns off and shave the neck beard. I also have a mustache. My problem is that it still looks trashy, thin and unkempt, even when I comb it. I have only been growing it for 2 weeks now. Would it be worth waiting a while for it to grow in or should I just shave it? Also do you like bearded guys?

>>17355222
I promise you, your beard doesn't do as good of a job at hiding your fat chin as you think it does. Also weedy moustaches are the worst, shave it if you don't think it'll get better.

>Also do you like bearded guys?
Don't care, but I definitely don't like fat guys.

>>17355230
Thanks for your help.

How do I get over my first?

She was my first for everything and she just decided to end it for an immature reason.

Please help me.

>>17355351
You seem to be lost. This is an Ask The Opposite Gender Anything thread.

There's a girl that lives in my dorm whom I like and am thinking of asking out. I think she likes me too. Thing is, I'm a shy guy and still a virgin, while she seems pretty experienced. I think she has had several casual hookups, and talks about having multiple "boyfriends". I'm not sure how to proceed, or even if it could work.

I have a friend who is attracted to people who are "abusive" and she hates herself for it. She seems to specifically gun for the type - the kind you can tell is bad news from the get-go. The first few times I and our friends helped her see she was in a poisonous relationship, but we don't really know what to do if she's specifically attracted to that kind of person.

I'm not audible in bed, meaning I don't like making much vocal noises. Is this commonly a turn off?

>>17355500
It would help if you stated your gender. That really matters.

I'm female, and I hate how quiet my boyfriend is in bed. My ex was really vocal, and it turned me on like crazy. It bothers the hell out of me that my current guy only makes breathing noises. I've confronted him about it numerous times, but he always says it makes him feel stupid and embarrassed to make sounds. So whatever. I just gotta deal with it.

>>17355504
Oh, sorry about that. Male anon.

Also, thank you for your input.

>>17352575
Do people really think like this? It's obvious that the double standard exists because women are the sex that chooses who to sleep with. Any woman can fuck dozens of guys but a man who can do fuck many women is clearly exceptional.

To females.

Provided you're in a rs with someone you like:

- he tells you he wants an FFM and can set it up. Do you do it?
- he tells you he wants to fuck other woman/women. Do you permit it?
- he tells you he's going to be to busy for sex for the next couple of months. Do you fuck someone else during this time?

>>17355645
>he tells you he wants an FFM and can set it up. Do you do it?
No.
>he tells you he wants to fuck other woman/women. Do you permit it?
Yes. Because I dump him.
> he tells you he's going to be to busy for sex for the next couple of months. Do you fuck someone else during this time?
No.

This question isn't specifically for girls.
So my girl best friend is dating this black guy and she talks about him all the time, it's literally killing me.
I don't like the girl or anything but i guess im jealous.
I told her to stop talking about this guy
She said "this is going to suck you're my best friend" and shit like that.
I told her that she should forget i said anything.
It's been going on for a week and i think that i will completely end my friendship with her because i just can't handle it anymore

>>17355653
What if he wants MMF or for you to fuck other men?

Is five inches a good sized dong

>>17355688
Depends on your income. Probably would have to fuck on the side desu

>>17355682
You sound jealous instead of being happy for your friend.

But what exactly bothers you? If she is your friend just listen or just joke with her about how obsessed she is about her bf.

>>17355688
Why so insecure about your dick? Let me guess, are you an Amerifat?

>>17355682
What's your problem? Is it the fact that the guy is black?

>>17355685
>What if he wants MMF or for you to fuck other men?
No and no.I don't want to fuck someone other than my SO or to be with someone who fucks someone else.

>>17355751
>>17355730
Honestly i dont know what the problem is.
I think it's making feel inferior.
The guy is 6'2 im 5'7, he is funny and im not, he is romantic and im not.
Im jealous and im insecure i know this.
I wish i could just tell her that im offered a job in kenya or something and just disappear for a few months

Have you ever been raped? Did you secretly enjoy it?

>>17355764
>Honestly i dont know what the problem is.
You simply cannot compete with the BBC.

>>17352575

What was the classic saying?

A lock that can be opened by any key is a shitty lock, but the key that can open any lock is a master key

>>17355775
A sharpener that can sharpen many pencils is a good sharpener. A pencil that's sharpened too much is useless.

>>17352591

Same here. I can talk to a girl, make her laugh, go into the smart types of talking, tell her about my life.

But then comes the romantic part, the touching and all. I suck at that. I just try to catch her hand, but I never manage to touch it. Fucked me up

>>17355781
A woman that's slept with many men is a slut. A man that's slept with many women is a stud.

>>17355774
Dude im not interested im fucking this girl.
She's just a friend I've known for a long while

>>17355788
sure thing white boi

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>tfw my name is brandon

well fuck me guess im out

>>17355766
I openly enjoy it, with my girlfriends and cuck friends. If the latter even dare to say something about it I humiliate them on fb, make a blog post which our lecturers read and they are pretty much done. Of course, I still go for sympathy points.

>>17355818
>with my girlfriends and cuck friends. If the latter even dare to say something about it I humiliate them on fb, make a blog post which our lecturers read and they are pretty much done.
What?

>>17354011
>>17354058
>>17354119
>>17355004

You are right. I was blind to what ended us. I didn't neglect her, I neglected the relationship.
Is there any way for me to fix this? Should I bring it up to her?

I understand that romantic feelings are built in the beginning of a relationship while two people get to know each other. So is there any way after two years, and then her losing romantic attraction due to me neglecting the relationship for me to demonstrate that I can hold up my end? This seems nearly impossible outside of the context of a relationship.

>>17356028
I don't remember much of your situation but it's hard to want to go back with someone after passion is gone.

>>17356195
The thing I've come to realize is that I was the one that initially lost the passion. As soon as she dumped me it all came back. We effectively switched places. I talked to her once about us getting back together but I did it very objectively.
I told her how great we are together and some other stuff but I never told her how I feel. I'm going to talk to her one more time and explain that I feel the passion. It can't hurt. There's a sliver of a chance that it fixes things but if it doesn't it's not like she can dump me again.

For the femanons

I'm 21, I'll be losing my hair over then next week cause cancer, and I'm wondering if you look at hairless individuals differently.

Moreover, is it even morally right to involve myself with more girls when I have a possibly terminal illness??

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How do I hit on a girl? And how do I see if she's interested in me?

>be an assistant examiner on a language exam
>some qt girls are taking it
>a few days later receive a message on fb from a girl who says she took that exam and thought she'd like to get to know me, and asked if I want to grab something to eat with her
>agree and go to a café together
>didn't remember her but she's actually super cute
>we get along just fine, initially planned to stay with her for only an hour, maybe 1,5, but go after 2,5h and only because I was already half an hour late to the next appointment
>set a date to hang out again right away
>she's always only free pretty late, 8 pm or so, but she changes one of her appointments to be able to meet me earlier because it's inconvenient to me
She seems really nice, and she's way out of my league. I'm spaghetting hard but I don't want to end up like I usually do, when girl either assumes I just want to be friends (which is true sometimes), or quickly considers me friend-only material herself. Seriously, the only times I had sex or anything close to it was when the girls hit on me themselves really quick and in really obvious ways (like, well, kissing me).
Do you think I can assume she's interested in me romantically/sexually? How do I show I'm interested too? I'm kinda shy when it comes to this kind of stuff, I don't make "moves" per se, I only confessed super awkwardly twice to close female friends and got rejected so I'm always afraid I'm just misreading.
Also wondering where should we go next time. Café again would be boring.

>>17356210
I don't know
If you really want to do it don't do it asking her back.
I'm still waking up, can't think much right now.

Well, this is going to be a long story.
A couple of months back I met a guy and he helped me through tough times. I fell in love with him. He had a gf.
He broke up with her and wanted to date another friend of his, but she couldnt meet him for months. In the meantime we fucked a couple of times. I ended up saying I want something more than casual relationship. Things got messy, but we somehow stayed friends.
After that I wanted to move on. I started dating, mentioned on the group chat Im on the date with a guy and after that he started flirting with me again. I had a couple of stuff at his place and he came over once. We talked until 1 pm and he said he missed me, he cares about me etc, eventually telling me he didnt felt like going back home. So we fucked.
After that he asked me on something that sounded like a date. Dinner, massage etc. If I wasn't so tense around him it would be best time I had with him, even if he didnt tried to hide the fact he dated other women.
I tried to set boundaries at that point but conversation gone nowhere with him sounding somewhat pissy and I got distracted by other problems.
By this pointyou guys are probably considering me an idiot for still sticking around - reminder that I loved him and owed him my life.
Anyway he finally met the girl he wanted to date. They are dating now. Problem is, she didn't knew about us, we were hanging out on a chat. She wanted to be friends with me and meet me, she in a town a long while away.
1/2

>>17356545
So when she came over we scheduled a dinner. I told her I want to avoid him for a while, he explained it away as some "mistaken feelings". Somehow he thought I moved on already by the time he started fucking again or at least thats the version he presented, because when I told him he's right and that's why I didnt want to see them together - he was either surprised or made a good show at pretending he is. I bailed on her when I found out they are together but she kept asking to meet me.
Anyway, I asked him to tell her, because it's making things awkward. He first accused me of blackmail, than got really pissed off and told me I'm a threat to his happiness because he can't trust me not to fuck things up for him. He said he regretted ever helping me.
He then requested me not to talk to him or his new gf again. I did that. I don't mean him any harm. Cried about it to mutual friend.
She know tells me he's pissed off at me for "making him feel guilty" and apparently complains a lot about me, shes about to tell me more today. I cut all the contact with him, left the groups we were on, and told his gf we can't talk.
What is happening? I told the guy I loved him, and that's why I can't hang out with him and he gets paranoid and pissed at me, even though I never did anything to him to warrant this.
I'm not sure if he tried to fuck me and play with my emotions or this is just what ended up happening - but then why does he hate me?

>>17356551
I don't think he hates you. He just really wants to date this girl and he's scared that if you tell her about the situation between you and him, that she'll leave him.
I think the best thing you could do now is just to break the contact for a while and move on. He seems like the guy who does play with your emotions and you seem like the girl who's accepting that.
Just leave him and move on, it's probably for the best.

>>17356551
I kissed a girl for the first time in my life a couple of days ago. We met on tinder.
She's cute and all and I think I like her but I'm still freaking out a bit on how to go about the second date and what do I want from this. I don't wanna hit and quit and relationships freak me out. How should I go about this?

>>17356598
Keep it casual until you figure it out and tell her not to expect anything serious until you'll be ready, And keep calm, you don't have to rush into anything.

>>17356598
>>17356609
+ but above all be honest and open, please

>>17356224
We all have a terminal illness homie. We all gonna die.

Question for girls.

Been dating chick for a little over a month, hung out a handful of times, some for 10+ hours at a time.

She tells me she's scared of having a relationship since her ex, but she doesn't want to fear it, because she doesn't want to miss out on being with a guy like me.

Tells me she respects me, she wants to get to know me more, she's really "into" my personality. Occasionally makes dirty jokes.

Invited me over to her apartment this weekend because she wants to talk to me about where we're going from here. She basically said she wants to talk everything out and decide whether we should become a couple after that. But followed it by saying she's not sure if she just wants to be friends or be in a relationship right now. Bitch got me hella confused.

I get the distinct feeling she's going to reject me, even though we're supposed to be hanging out the day after that too.

I don't really mind either way, although I really like her so I would prefer to be with her. It won't be the end of the world if she's not into it.

What I want to know is, what do you think is the most likely outcome here? What should I expect? Is there anything I can do to raise my chances?

>>17356778
>implying i'm not gonna ascend and become one
>tfw we are all one but separate ourselves

>>17356794
It's impossible to know. She's clearly not over whatever happened. and she probably doesn't want to hurt anyone. Agree to play it by ear and give her time, but that doesn't guarantee you anything so take that under consideration(you gonna bang tho).

girls would you ever participate in a reverse gangbang (where theres one guy and a bunch of girls)? under what circumstances?

>>17356843
>under what circumstances
That I get to eat a lot of pussy as well

>>17356848
so basically youre saying that if some girl you didnt know approached you and said "look bitch me and girls are going to fuck this guy, if you come help you'll get to eat a bunch of pussy, want to come?" youd say yes? like with complete indifference do the guy you'll be fucking?

>>17356853
Realistically, no. In my fantasies, sure. You go by girls you know would go for it or known slags if you want a gangbang, mate.

>Be 3 years ago high school senior
>Hispanic girl in Spanish class starts talking to me for no apparent reason
>She gets very flirty with me, but don't think much of it
>Starts asking me about how marriage would work within my culture and asks me if I would date her (I am brown)
>Uhhh... idk...
>Find out she has a boyfriend, which is a fact that I sort of ignore
>She's still super flirty with me and I enjoy the attention
>Other people jokingly mention they will "tell Carlos" everytime she's flirting or talking with me
>Deduce that Carlos=Boyfriend
>Someone brings him up again and I ask "Who is Carlos?"
>"Don't worry about it."
>Commence I must be better than Carlos, but why is she dating him, hiding about it to me, but still flirting with me?
>Confuso as fuck, but went with it until graduation
>Fast forward 1 year after graduation
>She gets pregnant
>Gains weight and doesn't look as pretty as she did in high school
>Carlos is no longer in picture

Why do girls like to give off mixed signals?

>>17356794

If she wanted to be with you, she would do. When I met my current partner I had only recently gone through a break up from an eight year relationship. I'd had time to deal with it and I ended everything but it was still a huge life change.

I met someone shortly after and knew immediately they were the person I wanted to be with as it just felt right. I was happy being single but happier beings with them.

Of course everybody is different, all relationships take different courses so I'm not saying my way of thinking is the only way.

However, no amount of talking to you will make her over her ex, she's either there or she's not. It sounds like she's playing a bit of a game really.

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For the femanons

I'm 21, I'll be losing my hair over then next week cause cancer, and I'm wondering if you look at hairless individuals differently.

Moreover, is it even morally right to involve myself with more girls when I have a possibly terminal illness??

Why does my little sister get an attitude when girls or women tell her im hot in front of her? Im a male. For example my doctor is a woman and she will always tell me mom and sister how good looking she thinks i am and my sister hates it. I get my hair cut at the same place my mom and sister do, so the day after i went my mom and sister did and one of the ladies who worked there told them how attractive i was. Of course some of my sisters friends found me attractive too.

why does she not like this?

>>17356932
have fun! you have to search for a serious relationship anywaysl, and that takes a little bit of time. for u, im sure u wont have trouble with that.

honestly, no matter what situation, u shudnt care what others think

>>17356974
She is protecting you from them bitches.
But i bet you are humblebragging and already knows it.

>>17356932
It doesn't matter and yes. It would be immoral not to tell her though.

>>17356932
you know that by posting that picture you become a gigantic faggot, right? that's a dude
>no its not
yes it is
>muh lgbtq oppression
it's still a dude

>>17357001
no im like borderline aspergers lol im not bragging, I just wanted to know why she gets like that. my mom just laughs.

Girls
My female friends are overly critical IMO of the girls I date or pursue.They're nice to them in person but will say shit later like
>why do you like her
>you could do better
>you could be dating X she's so much prettier

I mostly brush it off but feel like it gets to me on some level. They're awesome friends otherwise and they're just looking out for me but how do I get them to back off a bit?

>>17357036
Wait - that's really a dude? Not that anon, but I didn't know looking at it.. Where's your source to verify

>>17357137
Okay so I'm not 100% sure but some forum posts after a google search claim it's a dude. I guess you can never be sure these days, can you?

Girls and guys

Just because you Can doesn't mean you Should right?

I'm on vacation right now on a island staying by myself in a nice resort. The girl at the front desk stares at me, not like a friendly smile as a employee, but she actually like fixated on me when I walk through the lobby. The funny thing is although I'm not ugly, I'm not a lady's man. And I'm actually pretty lousy with girls. Although in this case, I'm pretty sure I could bang her. I don't think I'm going to tho. That's ok right? I shouldn't right?

Men:

I'm 25 and going after guys in the 19-22 range. Do men find this weird/intimidating?

>>17357227

I wouldn't. I think girls a few years (not much, but just a few years) older than me are more attractive than younger girls.

when I was 21/22 I liked 26 year old girls. You all are more mature mentally and honestly, I think better looking.

>>17357227
I can only guess age by decades so i wouldn't even know.

>>17355222

Lose weight you stupid fatass. Fat men are the worst. You can literally eat twice as much as I can and not get fat...what is your fucking excuse?

>>17355351

deal with it? Fuck someone else? Stop being a bitch? Realize there are 3.5 Billion women on Earth?

>>17355645

I'm fine with threesomes, and I'm fine with open relationships as long as he wears condoms always, but he's not gonna fuck other women unless I can fuck other men.

>too busy for sex
>for months

Unless he's just been nominated POTUS I would have an issue with that. I would fuck like ten guys just to spite him, sorry.

>>17355688

Small/average but acceptable. Get good with fingers and tongue.

>>17355766

I've been sexually assaulted and date(almost)raped, and I kind of enjoyed them, but if they had put the ponos in I would not have. That crosses a line.

>>17356224

I really don't like bald guys but if you say you have cancer you'll get a ton of pity sex.

>>17357094
Honestly this is a scarlet flag that they either have feelings for you, or are "friends" with you more to get male attention than because they care about you. It is absolutely not done to criticize someone's partner choice without a proper reason (her not being pretty enough is not a proper reason). Honestly, even if I felt like a friend of mine was dating an extremely controlling/borderline abusive girl (and I have...) I'd tread extremely carefully while trying to make him see that the relationship's not healthy. Because you are meddling in a part of their life that frankly has nothing to do with you, and because it's most people's natural response to just grow defensive and stop sharing if you criticize the person they love. Even if it is for good reasons, they typically can't see that yet.

Also, realize that if you do not actively shut them down, you are not being a great boyfriend. How would you feel if your girlfriend hung out with a good male friend who was talking shit about you, and she went "ah well whatever"? You need to tell them straight up, in a calm voice: "That's mean." "Why would you say something like that?" "Do you question my judgment?" Any of these or a variation. If they are decent girls they'll get flustered and realize they're acting like petty high school bitches. If they don't back down, tell them that you cannot be friends with someone who disrespects the person you love for superficial reasons, and they are endangering the friendship with you to go there, and let them chew on that for a while.

>>17357094
Tell them to stop being jealous cunts. Why do you have so many friend girls anyways?

>>17357254
>Lose weight you stupid fatass
Oh I'm sorry I thought I was supposed to gain more weight, it's obvious that women love fat slabs of meat. I'm a fool for trying to exercise this weight off. I guess I'll just stop doing cardio and lifting weights to try and lose weight. I'll go back to sitting on my ass all day. Thanks, you're a real help.

>>17356974
Protectiveness. It is normal for opposite sex siblings to feel -some- discomfort around others who acknowledge them as attractive. Your sister is probably a young girl who has never had to share you, she's always been the most important female peer in your life. Women complimenting your looks are a reminder that one day a woman will come into your life who will become more important to you than she is and will be close to you in ways that she cannot compete with.

This is completely normal and will pass when she grows older, gets her own experiences, meets girlfriends and so on. Also, chances are that she does not consciously realize herself why it bothers her and just becomes annoyed.

>>17357272

You're asking how to hide your fat and like nigga you ain't hiding it. Beards NEVER hide a fat face, we can fucking tell. If anything it just highlights it like a fat girl wearing a fupa-kini. If you're gonna be a fat piece of shit at least accept it. You ain't fooling anyone and fat guy beards just look a travesty. No damn point getting mad at me. Go run a few laps you lardass.

>>17357258
I don't think they have feelings for me since they're all in serious relationships. They usually become friends and stop being so critical (at least to me) with girls I date seriously, but when I'm in the early hook up gray area stage with a girl they get like that. I do tell them "hey come on be nice" but I guess that's not very firm. They're great friends and maybe I rely on them too much when I break up they causes them to be that way.

>>17357268
Not sure, our circle is pretty chill so girls that date some of us stick around, or their friends do. They're kind of like sisters to me and even my blood sisters say the same kind of things about girls I date so I kind of felt like it was a female thing.

>>17357309
They could still get jealous over being trumped by a woman you like but also fuck. Some people are like that, there is no cure.

I would just be a level firmer and straight up say that it's a mean thing to say, or they're not acting like a good friend by tearing down a girl special to you.

>live-in gf is an anal goddess
>a few weeks ago she says that she doesn't want to do anal anymore
>"I'm sore the next day and people can tell I that I walk funny"
>tell her okay
>she gets drunk one night and we get hot and heavy
>do anal on her with her consent
>next day she's mad at me
>repeat a few times per week, basically any time she drinks
>she seems legitimately mad at me now

How much of this is her drinking to have an excuse to do it then blaming me, and how much of this is me being an asshole to her asshole?

>>17357227
Not by itself. Perhaps a little weird if I knew you were conscious about it.

>>17357309

They're worried about your girlfriend being more liked than they are, so instantly start trying to make your doubt her.

My boyfriend has some female friends and one of them in particular felt the need to pass comment on something nice I decided to do for him. It was absolutely none of her business, he was telling her (I presume) because he was really impressed and she took the opportunity to make a negative comment. She has no interest in him and is in a long term relationship, but it's an attempt to remain in a certain position with him.

It's really not healthy and may cause issues with your current girlfriend. I think it's really important to accept your partners friends regardless of whether you get on with them, but shit like this puts a barrier up before you've even started (which is what their intention often is by exhibiting this behaviour).

Next time they do it, try asking them why they're saying it and that it's very mean. They will feel awkward because they've been called out on their bitchy behaviour and hopefully, it will stop.

Girls, who like to spend a lot of time at home:
Where can I meet you and ask you out if things go well?

>>17357333
You're absolutely being an asshole. She's horny for it when drunk, but soberly explains that she doesn't want it and why. I fully understand caving once or twice because you're human and she's receptive, but the scenario described sounds like you jump at the chance to go against what you KNOW to ultimately be her wishes about her body because you value the anal fucking more. You are supposed to care about the things that she cares about, she expressed to you what her hesitation is and you should respect that as well because you know of it. You're not a kid acting out as soon as the mom looks away, you're supposed to be a team and you should look out for her interests as well.

Although frankly, it sounds like she has an issue with alcohol if she both gets drunk a couple of times a week and in doing so fails to uphold her own boundaries the way she actually wants to (if you take alcohol out of the equation).

And last but not least it sounds like you're doing anal wrong if it hurts her like that. Most people know to use lots of lube and keep adding lube during the act, but there's also
>don't thrust it in, keep still and let her push herself down on your dick
>always start with slow thrusts
>if she's extra sensitive, she should thrust on you and never the other way around, or you should do only slow thrusts and she can bounce up and down fast
People watch too much porn and see professionals who have been fucked anally for god knows how long take it like a pro. The ass is not designed for fucking and there's a significant group of women who can have painfree and pleasant anal sex, but not as wild and male dominated as they can enjoy vaginal sex. So don't give up right away on the possibility of painfree anal if your girlfriend is interested, if you haven't already tried all this it's worth experimenting with.

>>17357333
Just don't do anal with her anymore, you asshole. Don't ask her to. Don't make her do things you know she'll regret.

>>17357354
>>17357322
Thanks, I'll be more firm and clear. I'm really chill and laid back so "be nice" isn't really taken seriously, almost like a challenge to be more catty.

>>17356591
I did, anon. My friend told me he's ranting I'm immature, crazy and untrustworthy and the worst person on the planet yada yada yada and he seems to be under impression I'm under obligation to keep silent about what happened between us and make polite excuses when his gf wants to meet me. He apparently didn't told me not to talk to her or him(I asked him if he wanted to, and said a bunch of other stuff but he replied with Yes and that other stuff didn't warrant a comment - either way, telling his gf he doesn't want us to talk is correct).
He wants me to protect his arse whilst offering nothing but spit in my face in other words.
Well, this will only help me move on.

Boyfriend has an extremely large penis. Before I met him, I was extremely tight as I hadn't had a lot of sex and hadn't had anything inside me for about six months.

When we first met, it was extremely difficult for him to go inside and we had to take it slowly with a lot of lube. Now, after several months of regular sex, it isn't as difficult when he initially enters me.

I do kegals every night and I can still feel grip when I put fingers in but I'm really worried that I'm not going to keep that tightness and he will be disappointed.

Am I being paranoid about this? Will it still feel as good for him as it did in the beginning?

>>17357404
Your vaginal wall is muscle, it's not exactly dead tissue that he's stretching out. Chances are the main reason it's become easier for you is because you had more positive experience so you can relax more fully when he goes to insert, whereas you cramped up a bit in the early stage.

Some women have loose vaginas but if they haven't given birth (which CAN absolutely do damage, although even that can typically be restored with training the vaginal muscles) sadly for them it has more to do with genetics and bad luck than with anything they inserted.

>>17357418

Thanks for this. I can tense up my muscles and I know he feels it because he reacts every time. I have full control over them and that's why I know my kegals are having an effect.

It's really hard to judge how it feels to him. It still feels uncomfortable at times (especially as he's always really close to my cervix at certain angles) but I just don't feel as tight. Maybe you're right and it's just because I'm way more relaxed and aroused than I allowed myself to be in the beginning.

>>17357404

You have more than one whole

>>17355766
I uh don't know.
I've been homeless, a guy helped me to be less homeless. First time I jumped him(stress and I was a virgin, don't wanna die like that). But all the other times he just took it without asking and I put up with it because I was nervous he'll throw me out. Then once I got a place he invited me for a party, I got drunk and he fucked me, and I woke up barely remembering it past taking my clothes off, bleeding because I think roughness. Anyway I was very dry during the whole... week, made it hurt pretty badly.
BUT I did enjoy it.
As for what it did to me, I'm a bit nervous about a guy I would get close to trying to fuck me out of nowhere because I'm not sure I would fight back or just take it no matter if I wanted it or not. As if my body was a thing and someone could get the idea he's entitled to it and I'll just accept it.
I've been sexually abused before that but it was more psychological thing. A sort of grooming and expectation to fulfill romantic needs and molestation.

>>17357438

Yeah and if he destroyed my vag, imagine what he'd do to my ass. I dread to think how painful the entire experience would be.

I would try it if he wanted to but so far he hasn't shown any interest in it.

>>17357433
I can understand the worries but really your vagina is designed to get fucked, if you can take it (even with some warming up period) it's not going to wreck you. And if you got much looser, the sensations would lessen for you as well because he wouldn't fill you up as much.

It's good to do kegels, good for your self esteem and sense of control, but you are really overthinking this. People make a big deal out of the whole sloppy loose pussy insult/joke, but at the end of the day it's not the tighter the better. When you were unaccostumed to him fucking you, it wasn't a more enjoyable experience for him. If the vagina is really much too tight it will push out the penis in a painful way, or in extreme cases with little fluid can even tear his frenulum. There is a sweet spot where it feels firm but still accommodating and soft, and it sounds like you have that together. Give yourself/your pussy a break.

>>17357454

Thank you for this :) I feel much better about the entire thing now.

Anybody:

How do you show interest? Just about all of my encounters have been generally by accident. I dont really know how to start anything with anyone, usually when I try I come off wrong.

It's really frustrating when I meet or see someone attractive and I want to get to know them, but not knowing where to go from there.

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>>17351991
Question for both since I didn't want to clog up the catalog:

>person A listens to person B in regards to all of their problems, trivial and serious ones
>person B does not wish to listen to person A's serious problems
>person B finds listening to said problems "distressing," especially when it comes to money problems
>person A says that person B should listen to them, or else person A will not want to put up with their "baggage" if the other person does not even try to do the same, as they deem this an "unfair relationship"
>person B calls person A a "cruel" person for this

Who is right in this scenario? Would you want to listen to another person's baggage without having that same responsibility given to them when it comes to your problems? Would you think it's cruel for someone to give the ultimatium-- which is essentially "listen to my serious problems or else I will stop listening to yours."

>>17352083
Only if you bring it up regularly in conversation, or have to ask if it does on a Mongolian horse jockeying board.

>>17357457
No problem at all!

>>17357333

>in which anon rapes his girlfriend up the ass repeatedly and wonders why she is mad

>not sure if anon has heard of lube and stretching
>not sure if being trolled

>>17357355

I go to the grocery store, and to the coffee shop when I need to get work done. Sometimes I just go for a walk. I may also go to the park to read. Otherwise tinder or other internet site.

>>17357465

Smile. Eye contact. Talk to them.

>>17357404
>Boyfriend has an extremely large penis.

>tfw no big-dicked bf to ruin my fuckholes and make me addicted to his cock

>>17357472
B is right. It's not an equal friendship - most aren't 100% equal, but it works for the people involved. This is a dramatic discrepancy and obviously B is not alright with it. Person A invests in deflecting the criticism, making excuses, but not owning up.
Let's be real, no one gets really happy listening to the problems of a friend, but if you are sincerely involved you want to and deal with it anyway, even if it is a bit depressing. Finding it too "distressing" sounds like bullshit to me to cover up that person A is a user who is too comfortable with the relationship evolving around their needs.

A true friend would at the very least take the time to acknowledge that it is unfair and that they are falling behind as a friend by not providing support and/or a listening ear. Person A couldn't even do that and in fact went into attackmode. Cut them out of your life.

>>17357404
tfw no bf with a large schlong

>>17352575
Humans are monogamous once they have children, Women get preggo so hypergamy in women isn't natural, Men by nature if they're more alpha are more able to fuck given they have more offspring. it's a matter of biology.

>>17357486
I was a little confused because you got A and B mixed up (my fault for not adding made-up names to the post-- I understand that's easier than single letters).

Okay, glad I'm not seeing this as person B is viewing it as. I got called "cruel" for giving the ultimatium, and now.. well, I feel godawful. They are my only friend that I know and I'm not sure how I could handle being alone again if I cut them out. They are adamant that they (person B) are in the right on this one, so adamant that I needed some time and space to think about what had just happened.

I rarely bring up my serious problems since I'm the type to bottle them up inside, and to hear "I don't want to listen to this, I get too stressed" as I finally vent some of those thoughts.. it wasn't good.

>>17357500
This is way too simplified. Men have an investment in protecting offspring as well. In theory if you look at stone age time or whatever, both men and women would be better off fucking around secretly and pretending to be monogamous. The man to spread his seed and the women to engage and bond with back up males in case the primary partner dies or runs off with someone.

Also, usually people do not just take the prehistoric situation for granted. Technically the most natural thing for a woman to do would be to openly let men fight one another to determine the superior one to have sex with. Yet in present day society both women and men tend to guilt trip/convince women into giving guys she's not into a shot, and most people would think a woman who happily lets men fight over her an entitled cunt.

>>17357515
Shit yeah, I sloppy post checking there, I just read it then went to my reply without making sure.

Honestly your judgment is clouded because you are involved with this person (I'll just call them Shitbag) for longer, you are afraid of being alone and they hurled a serious accusation your way that would make most people stop in their tracks for a moment. But from an outside perspective, Shitbag is just entirely selfish, in fact so selfish that they might sincerely not realize how one sided this dynamic is.

Shitbag will also later in life realize that no self respecting person will put up with this shit, and if they are too late catching up they will wind up with no one.

It is daunting to cut out a friend but it does not sound like you'd suffer a real loss to me. This is a person who has just shown that they have no real regard for how you are doing. Invest more in finding new friends, new hobbies, new networks that can potentially make you befriend people... and don't look back.

Obviously I understand wanting to think about it and what not, but that is my pressing advice.

>>17357560
Boy, again, I am so glad I am not the only one viewing it this way. I don't feel quite as filled with angst and worries anymore, now I feel a little more relaxed.

>Shitbag will also later in life realize that no self respecting person will put up with this shit, and if they are too late catching up they will wind up with no one.
Some people have to learn the hard way. I'll likely be doing his future relationships a favour if I cut him out to show that this is not how someone should be treated.

I've known this person for over 2 years.. we lived together, even. It's going to be hard, but I need to also learn to have self respect for myself and what kind of company I choose to keep.

Thank you, anon. I needed to hear this (or read this, if we're being anal about it). Since there's no real way to show my appreciation, I suppose a "have a great day" will do. Thanks again.

>>17357574
>doing his future relationships a favour
Absolutely. If you want to maximize this, phrase your goodbye message accordingly. I think part of the "cruel" came from Shitbag (not expecting any personal needs from you to begin with) being unpleasantly surprised with the ultimatum. I'd say that you understand he responded negatively to that, it was a spur of the moment thing because you were frustrated and felt uncertain in how to address your concerns with the friendship. But this event has caused you to think things over and you reached the conclusion that you don't want to be in touch anymore because you feel that your dynamic is unequal and he does not return the level of involvement you express for his life and issues.
Obviously it does not come down to this phrasing. Then you block him. Chances are 9/10 that he will throw a private hissy fit and think you're the worst thing since Hitler, and then after he's heard the same thing from others (or they just left his life without a verbal warning and he was too self involved to see the signs) he might think of it again and it might actually hit him, with more distance, what you meant and what stance he took in personal relationships.

But that's me, and if you just want to leave it at this or find another way that's fair as well of course.

It is hard but you are completely right, it is a matter of self respect. Ultimately it will be way easier to find people who are genuinely good to you and pleasant to be around when you show yourself to be someone who respects themselves and their desires in relationships with others, even if that feels counter-intuitive sometimes. Taking the role of the doormat bores the right people and is extremely attractive to people like Shitbag who prefer another person to make themselves small and insignificant in interaction.