Have a friend who I used to talk to all the time. We'd message

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Anonymous
2016-07-12 17:10:29 Post No. 17350155
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:10:29 Post No. 17350155 [Report]

Have a friend who I used to talk to all the time. We'd message daily. She'd always initiate and she considers us close friends. If we didn't talk for a few hours she'd message again.

Recently she's stopped messaging and if we don't talk for a few days she'd bring it up and say I need to make more effort. Ok so I do that, but I feel the chat has just gone dead and like she isn't bothered anymore and saying I need to make more effort is kind of shifting the blame because I honestly believe she just doesn't want to talk anymore. She doesn't message later in the day to keep contact either.

Lately she's been having a rough time, feeling burned out from social interaction, so she said she was going offline for a week. Came back, cool but the chat was still dead. Saw her IRL recently and she seemed fine, smiling, hugging, chatty etc.

I had to leave without saying bye (was in a group so didn't say bye to anyone) and understandably she was annoyed. I apologised and explained why and she said she was over it since I explained.

Next day she posted that she was going offline for a week again. We chatted a little bit for a minute here and there and I left it as "let me know when you are back" This was a little over a week ago. I also sent her a get well card but she didn't message to say she got it, despite having been online since.

She's been online recently but hasn't messaged. I don't know if she's really that low that she doesn't feel like talking or if she's just one of these people who go from person to person and is now bored of me and chatting to other people, or maybe she wants to see if I miss her and will message her? I feel like she's messaging someone because the last active timer keeps resetting to 1m.

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:29:16 Post No.17350196
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:29:16 Post No.17350196 [Report]

SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU ANYMORE

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:31:14 Post No.17350200
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:31:14 Post No.17350200 [Report]

Let her know that things have been off and that it concerns you, that your there for her if she needs to say something or needs a shoulder to lean on. Also let her know you understand people need their space sometimes but also to not forget that your there for her. thats all you need to say for now.

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:37:40 Post No.17350210
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:37:40 Post No.17350210 [Report]

>>17350196
Yeah it certainly looks like it doesn't it?

>>17350200
Done this before. She wanted to call me last week to talk about something but I couldn't take the call since I had to sleep for work, and was going to speak to her in the morning instead. She said she didn't want to speak about it then though.

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:40:47 Post No.17350221
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:40:47 Post No.17350221 [Report]

>>17350210
sounds like you been a bad friend in her mind with all these 'inconveniences' . Sure you can say you have this excuse, but she is going to think you dont give a fuck.

Ya blew it OP.

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:49:54 Post No.17350236
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 17:49:54 Post No.17350236 [Report]

So what next? Do I message her? Do I hope she messages me? How do I react when she does message me? I'm pretty upset and annoyed that she considers me a close friend and would just air me like that. Am I supposed to act like nothing happened?

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 18:52:34 Post No.17350375
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 18:52:34 Post No.17350375 [Report]

>>17350236
you did the same shit u described to her (once again, even if you had legit excuses), she needed you at a point which happened to be at night, but you cared about work more than her so now shes taking it out on you. nothing much you can do but wait it out till she opens up.

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Anonymous 2016-07-12 20:45:39 Post No.17350738
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Anonymous 2016-07-12 20:45:39 Post No.17350738 [Report]

>>17350375
That was kind of her fault. She knows I work nights and I only has 3 hours before work to sleep. She said she wanted to talk but wasn't ready. She didn't say what it was about so I thought it was just general chit chat. It turned out to be important but she didn't want to speak about it after the fact. Had she said it was important believe me I'd have gone without sleep to help her.

I'm really worried that she will never message again,but I don't think it's a good idea to contact her right now