>>17336562
how 2 get gf?

i've missed you

bumping for any potential lurkable convos

>>17336610

Start by asking yourself what you would want in a gf.

>>17336613
a girl
not fat

>>17336624

Be more specific. Non-fat girls is still a huge % of the population.

There's a girl that's all over me and I gotta hang out with her tomorrow. No choice. And she's hot and I'm afraid she's going to want to get frisky. Doesn't sound bad. But I'm in a relationship And I don't know what to do. Also she's a coworker. So I can't really tell her to Fuck off.

>>17336635

There's nothing in this life you HAVE TO do except die...

So! What is the real problem here? Do you want to cheat on your girlfriend and not get caught, or not ruin the work relationship by saying no? How do you feel about your current relationship?

>>17336643
You have to breathe

>>17336643
It would be nice but I'm not going to cheat cause I do love my girlfriend. I know were in a lil rut bit that's not a reason to go out and bang someone. I just don't know how to tell her no while still being professional.

>>17336662

I had a feeling you'd be in a rut, otherwise you wouldn't be so easily tempted by another woman.

You don't have to give me any full details, but how do you and your coworker rank against each other? Does she have any power over you in any way like being your manager, are you guys equals, or are you actually above her in the hierarchy of your workplace?

>>17336562
>Take girlfriend out to dinners
>When we get home she'll comment that it was really uncomfortable because of me, hinting towards conversation and that I don't talk as much.
>Cant figure this shit out

I go into formal mode when I'm in a restaurant but I still engage in good conversation. I look back at the last time I took her out and I made her laugh, I was happy, I had appropriate table manners (which is normal because it's how I was raised).
Not once did she appear uncomfortable. I was shocked when we got home and she said it again.

Wtf is this shit ?
Should I just stop taking her out ?

>>17336673

No, you shouldn't stop taking her out. You should talk to her about why she's uncomfortable. Ask her to be specific as to what you may be doing wrong OR if it's just something that belongs solely to her.

Maybe you are doing nothing wrong, and she's just misinterpreting things, or just has a knack for feeling uncomfortable. Or maybe you're too formal and gets boring?

You say that she says you don't talk much. What does that mean exactly? Do you just ask question after question and get her to talk at you or what?

Can the no-contact rule still work if you tell your ex-significant other that you're going to do it/your reasons for doing it?

>girlfriend breaks up with me
>she's been berated her entire life by bad boyfriends, I'm the only one that wasn't bad
>says she still loves me but doesn't deserve me or to be loved, that she deserves to be alone for hurting people in the past, thinks she'll hurt me in the long run
>can't convince her to forgive herself, realize she'll have to find her own motivation to do it
>tell her that as much as I'd like to be friends right away, I'd have feelings for her
>want to give her time to think, establish no contact rule, but tell her my reason for doing it is because I want to one day get back together and that when I'm done with the period of taking a break for myself we can be friends, potentially, but it'll hurt, and I'll still have returning to our relationship in mind
>she says she'll wait for me

Did I fuck up or could this potentially work if I give her time?

A friend has been distant and rude recently, little but important things like getting a ride with me to somewhere, then leaving with another friend without saying anything, just giving me a wave when we made eye contact as she was leaving.

Now I've found out this might be because she is mad at my close friend and housemate. Should I message her about it at all? On one hand she has been rude to me, but on the other hand that seems a bit petty. It doesn't seem like she cares about me much but I don't know if that means I should reciprocate that kind of behaviour.

>>17336701

I think you're just being honest, and if she can't handle that, then she really is stuck in a rut where she can't forgive herself. If she's honest about waiting for you, the no contact rule would be best because it is really easy to get back into old habits with each other whenever you hang out, unless you hang out with other people at the same time.

But even then you can end up getting jealous if other guys start trying to flirt with her and she plays into it.

I don't think you fucked up in any way here. Go no contact, bear with the pain, let her out of your system, and once you've relaxed from all this, if you still hold feelings for her--check to see how she's doing and if she's ready to get back together.

Being just friends after something like this would be a difficulty that may not be worth putting up with.

>>17336715
Well if you want any resolution from this, you need to refrain from accusing her of certain things. You don't know if it's conscious or unconscious of her to be acting rude towards you.

Tell me: how do you feel about this friend when you're with them? How do you feel when they act rude? What does acting rude look like?

A girl struck up conversation with me at a bar. Did she want to marry me?

My girlfriend (currently it's been a LDR for a few months, but she's coming here in a few weeks) has severe self-esteem issues, and often gets sad because she has problems with self image and so on, although I tell her she's beautiful 24/7 (and she reacts badly to that, like she feels like I'm lying to her).

The thing that gets me, is that yesterday she got sad because randomly remembered some girl I talked her about that I said has a nice ass. And I told her about this 1 month ago and for she has a better body but oh well, I've learnt to not talk to her about any other girl's body. She told me it's not my fault, she'd latch into anything at all and be sad anyway.

What can I do to help her cope? I've drawn her a silly picture to try to make her laugh, and I told her a million times that I'm here for her, and I'll support her although I know it's a hard battle for her, and she said she has already surrendered in this battle but oh well. Also just sent her a long cute text to tell her good morning.

Is there anything else I can do? I don't have her address to send her anything, I feel rather powerless.

>>17336743

Not, Dr. Love, but if you want to send her something you could probably ASK her for her address m8. Not saying that would help though...

>found a gf.
>said she's been to third base before.
>starts fucking around with her.
>starts fingering
>blood all over my bed.
>wondering if her ex has skeleton fingers
>does he has small fingers?

>>17336755
Nah no way, she doesn't want me to spend any dime. I also had to convince her to let me pay half of the hotel we'll be staying on when she visits me in a few weeks.

I'm scared she'll do what >>17336701 is describing, leave me to not hurt me or whatever. I don't like feeling that I can't really help her, I tell her she's beautiful every single day and she even answers annoyed when I compliment her.

And she isnt' ugly at all. She's fucking hot and got paid for posing as a model last week, and it wasn't her first time. For fucks sake.

>>17336740

I don't know, how did the interaction go?

>>17336743
What >>17336755 said or you can also take a snapshot and e-mail it to her.

On to the bigger thing though, when it comes to her self image. It's nice that you want to tell her that she's beautiful, but she probably feels unheard when you do. Next time it comes up, ask her why she feels that way, what her childhood was like, and why it's such a big deal to her.

Stop complimenting her. She's either fishing for them or is truly insecure and just needs someone to listen to her speak about why she feels that way.

>>17336758
You, sir, just popped her cherry :D

>>17336729

No contact guy again. Wanted to get your take on the concept of 'no contact'. Normally, the no contact rule is a month longer, maybe two. But usually, it's also a manipulation tactic to make the person want you, and it's usually used after breakups where the person has no feelings for you (or says they don't), and it's used to have them realize how much they need you, so they'll message first.

In my case, I'm establishing that I'm using it, my reasons for it, and she still has full feelings for me, and forever will. Putting aside the obvious answer of 'do it until you feel comfortable with yourself and the situation', would it be wise to break it early? Usually, you do it until they message first, or the month has passed. I have a feeling she won't message because she trusts me and knows my feelings.

If I went for, say, two weeks, would that be enough time to potentially make her want to think over her own feelings and decide whether her self-imposed punishment, or me, is worth more? Or should I stick with the full month even though a lot of the 'purposes' of the no contact rule have been achieved by default?

A little convoluted, I know.

>>17336778

We talked for 10 or 15 minutes about scuba diving and politics and stuff. Then she went off for a minute and I got to talking with this guy sitting to the other side of me (he also started it, funny enough), and after she came back he was still talking to me and I didn't want to be impolite and was still sort of interested, so we kept talking. She seemed to wait around for a while before leaving though...

I think it was all just coincidences.

how 2 tinder.


also, how 2 tinder with a match i kno irl.

>>17336801
Two weeks is nothing if your relationship has been either long and/or strong. If used as a manipulation tactic to make the other person crawl back to you, then that's bullshit, but I will trust that your unique reasons are genuine. Don't give it a number. Do it for as long as you feel you need to.

I don't obviously know her, but you both need time and space to think shit through away from each other.

>>17336802
Do you have her number?

>>17336804
You don't.

>>17336814

>Do you have her number?
Nah, like I said, I don't think there was anything to it.

>>17336562
What do when fall for person you know will never feel the same way, spend a lot of time together and get real close. Then realize it's not healthy and cut myself off for 2 months to get over them. End up thinking about them even more and it just makes things worse. Go back to hanging out with this person. How do I get over this?

>>17336837

>friendship, spending a lot of time together
>two month gap
>back to friendship, spending a lot of time together
kek, they know what's up. Just tell the person how you feel; say that you can't maintain the friendship anymore because of that.

Revealing your feelings will help you feel better. You haven't done so only because you're afraid of the person "finding out". Take heart, they already know.

>>17336837
Basically what >>17336853 said.

Let your feelings out or you'll just live in a perpetual null zone of never knowing for sure if they feel the same way.

If you tell them how you feel and they reciprocate, you can end up together and have a loving relationship.

If you tell them how you feel and they don't feel the same way, well at least you know and at least your courage grows exponentially for doing something vulnerable and difficult.

Oh boy, is this thread where i get to vent?
If that's it,then get ready for a really long blog.

So, there's girl that is one of my best friends (i'm a dude btw), she's been part of my group of friends since i've meet this group, back then she was dating one of the guys but they broke up a long time ago right now and they both carried on with their lives.
That was a long time ago, and since she was my friend's gf i never cared to look at her as a woman, and after their break up, she was already too good of a friend and i couldn't look at her from a romantic viewpoint.
Fastforward to the present, lately we've been spending a lot of time together,like too much, its been 2 weeks that i see her everyday, yesterday being the exception because she was busy.
During the first week everyting was really normal, we hang out like we always do, but it was weird that we were seeing eachother every day.
Then, when the second week comes, i'm starting to really think that i may be starting to like her after all these years, and try and be a little distant without being an asshole.
Everyday i'm starting to struggle between me thinking that i'm confused because she's realy caring and i like hanging out with her, and thinking that there might be more to it.
This brings us to a conversation we had tonigt.
She told me she deleted Tinder because every guy she meets in there wants to fuck, and she's looking to meet people to have a relationship.
After i told her ''i told you Tinder is for fucking!'', we started talking and she starts rambling about how she misses having a bf, doing the things you do when you are in a relationship ( i feel the exact same way, people think i miss my ex gf but what i miss is the relationship).
So she starts listing the things she misses and oh boy, its the exact same things we have been doing these past few weeks
So my question is:
Is she doing this on purpose? does she realize we've been doing those things she wants a bf for?
this is long so sorry.

>>17336910
She was totallly dropping bait for you, dude. I don't know if she's doing it on purpose, but she is definitely dropping bait for you or teasing you. Only one way to find out: tell her everything you told us all just now.

THAT'S ALL FOR ME FOR TONIGHT FOLKS!!!

This has been fun and it's nice to be back. To everyone who has asked a question, please respond and let me know how I did.

Have I helped you? Hindered you? Let me know what you think and feel free to keep me posted about your situation the next time I open another thread! (or even right now as I may check this thread again in the morning)

>>17336910
Not to burst your bubble, but it sounds like you are 100% friend zoned, anon.

If she says she misses those things and you have been doing them together, it means she misses doing those things with someone she is attracted to.

You can always say "hey, so I know we've been friends for a while, and you mentioned you miss doing the things we have been doing. Can you tell me with 100% honesty if you are telling me this because we are friends or because you want to be more?"

Don't put yourself in a bad position by making the first move, ask her what her intentions are before you make the move.

>>17336920
>>17336922
Okay,i was going to add the reason i'm fucking confused but that last post was over the character limit.
Apart from all those things, she's been getting (uncomfortably) close physically to me.
She started to always sitting down besides me when we hang out with the rest of the gang, when we take the bus shes always sitting with me, she started doing this thing where whenever we are eating something she feeds me(you know,like how a couple would), at first i accepted that because she's my friend but now i stop her when she tries to do it.
Then there's the little details.
Sunday we went with our friends to watch a movie, and we were going to be sitting in pairs because the teather was full, i was supossed to be sitting with one of my male friends, and she exchanged seats with this dude resulting in her sitting besides me.
Then the wtf factor comes when i saw her playing sims and the family she mad consisted on me and her (wich creeped me out, you don't do that shit and let other people see it).

And then she acts as if she wouldn't touch with a 3 foot stick

>>17336943
Stop hesitating and start touching back. She's giving you a shit test and you're failing. You will soon be friendzoned if you don't make a move.

Now I am officially out for the night!

>>17336947
>>17336947
Thanks for the advise, i do reciprocate what she does, but right now i'm thinking on not doing it for my own sake, i really don't want to fall for her, but she makes it really difficult, especially when she sits on my bed and impregnates my bed with her smell, that makes it hard to think straight when you're alone in your bed taking to yourself trying to sort things out.

but anyways, I'll try to talk to her about it, it really helped me vent out because this isn't something i can talk about to anybody.

I want to buy my gf a nice little present, what do you think would be good? I pretty much exhausted jewlery at this point.

Also not too expensive, not much more than 100bucks

>>17336957
What does she like?

>>17336961
Well, she is a highschool teacher, loves animals an anything history related. I thought of getting her some lillies, but something more lasting would be nice.

>>17336957
How about you make her a gift yourself? you now like, buy one of those books with plain blank pages, get pictures of her,you and her friends, family,pet,etc, and paste them on the frst pages, also grab magazines and cut things that reminds you of her and paste them too, then tell her to fill the rest of the pages, like a diary, write her some nice things on some pages.
Its a nice gesture and she will love the creativity

>>17336970
Im not a handy guy, and honestly, that seems like too much work.

>>17336966
Why don't you get something related to her interests?
A nice book about history, or maybe some antique book - my best friend got me a old anatomy book when I got into med school, wonderful gift.
Some more generic gifts could be: purse, lingerie, something for the house, something fancy to eat (a friend of mine got me some fancy teabags and chocolate for Christmas and I loved it).

>>17336981
>lingerie
Genius idea. Ill go with that.

>>17336982

>loves animals an anything history related
>great, I'll get her lingerie!
m8...

>>17337002
She also loves fancy underwear.

I am in a long term relationship and everything is really good but I have developed a crush on someone else. I really love my boyfriend and I don't want this crush, but I can't stop thinking about the other guy. How do I get rid of a crush?

>>17337006
Nothing wrong with having a crush. Just leave things to themselves and see what works out.

Ive been with my gf for 8 years now, and ive had many crushes over the years. The thing is, that i lose interest in those crushes so quickly. Things tend to sort themselves out.

Can I get a reality check?

>Dating a guy for 6 months
>He's 9 older than me (24, 33), divorced few months before we started dating, no kids
>We are amazing together - have tons of fun, share interests, on the same wave length, best conversations I've ever had, never get bored of him.
>Spend almost every day together
>He introduces me as his girlfriend to family and friends, always talks about me.
>We didn't fuck right away, waited for 3 months after we got exclusive.
>He seems crazy for me, I'm crazy for him.
>His best friend told me he has never been as happy as he is with me.

My friends keep saying my relationship is doomed and he's using me just for sex.
They all say I'm just a "pretty, young girl" and he'll get bored of me soon.

>>17337034
Your age difference isnt bad at all, and if you are happy then disregard your dumb friends. I mean, sure he might not be over his wife and use you as a way to blow off steam, but then again he could truly love you.

Just go along with it as long as it feels right.

>>17337041
His relationship with his wife was over years before they divorced (mutually), he still cares about her and sometimes he's sad that the relationship ended, but he seems to be over his wife.

Thank you, by the way.

I need to quit caring but it doesnt come naturally. What do?

I skipped the whole dating thing, my parents split last year...

How do them kids handle relationships with not having a place of their own?

Currently living with one parent to help them afford their mortgage...

How do I handle this subject when it comes up

>>17337817
If you are helping a parent pay the bills, you have rights as a paying tenant of that household. Which means you can have romantic partners over without being harassed. You explain to your mom/dad that you're dating and will be bringing people over. If they start to bitch, tell them that you are paying to live there and helping them remain in the home as well. As such, you get to enjoy the freedoms associated with being a paying tenant. That means you pay for a space, that space is yours to do as you please.

If they still throw a fit, you move out. Simple as that.

>>17337826
>money means I'm the boss of my parents now
Spoiled brat.

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>>17337034
>tfw this board gets more normalfag everyday

HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.

>>17337840
Okay?

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>>17337840
Oh man, the dude whose always upset is upset. Someone do something quick!

>>17337835
>B8ing this hard

I've been dating my girlfriend for 2 years now, and trust her completely. She has several male friends who she to talks with regularly and I can't help myself from feeling jealous.

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>>17337886
>trust her completely

First girlfriend? kek

>>17337826
What about judgement from who you're dating

Wall of text coming.

I'm a kissless virgin. I've met this girl from college since I started the career, 2 years ago. I liked her since I the beggining but I didn't try anything with her, just stayed friends with her.

For the last 2 months we've been getting closer (going for lunch together and alone, going to study, etc.), and it has really hit me. You know, I think I've fell in love with her.

Thing is, we still haven't hang out for anything not related to college, and I'm afraid to do so, because I think she finds me boring in conversations. She sometimes checks her phone, paying no attention to me, a situation in which I don't know what to do (I remain silent till she stops checking it). I've tried to find ways to be a better conversationalist, because it's true that I don't know how to carry a conversation if I'm not the listener, and it's something that troubles me and certainly produces me anxiety in context.

For the last week we haven't talked at all, because the semester is over and there are no classes in the entire summer. Yesterday I asked her over messages to hang out on monday, something to she has somehow agreed to, but I'm somehow scared about the situation.

My questions are:

How do I make the conversation flow with her?
Where do I take her to hang out?
When do I tell her my feelings?

>>17337977
Some bitches will czech their phone no matter who they're with


Now is when you tell her, and say you want to take things further, by asking her on a date

Pick something you know she'll enjoy

>>17336562
Is it possible to go for a real knock out if your looks are very, very average? My crush is like a 9/10 and i'm between a 5 and a 6, 7 at the very best.

How do i know if she's worth the effort? Currently we're not together but there's the chance to start again

Sometimes I'm feeling the spark, sometimes I'm not (especially when I think about him while not being with him) does this mean I'm just overthinking?
Also there are some things that he disagrees about that hints he might be kind of a fedora-wearing nice guy. Should I be worried if I know he won't treat me like I'm a retarded inferior woman, despite his sometimes cringey opinions?

>>17337059

Yeah me too

>>17336910 Here.
Any of the guys who replied to me are in here?

>>17336729
Thanks, you're right, I need to not be accusatory. I'll meditate on this for a bit, but I think I'll just talk to her when I see her again on Monday with the intention of mediating the argument.

>>17339489
I guess I should add that her being 'rude' to me is just her distant behaviour, not really acknowledging me when we have class together, not really talking to me.

Its selfish and petty but I felt slighted after she was friendly in the weeks before this started. I thought we were closer than this but I guess not. I hope I can put these feelings aside for now to see if I can help resolve their spat.

Gf of 2 years broke up with me fo the second time, the first being a year ago. Basically she suffers from anxiety and depression, and when we hot a rocky patch in the relationship it just gets worse. Ive got my own shit too but im stuck in a bit of a rut.

I want to get back together with her again, can anyone offer advice?

Recently told a girl I'd be putting some distance between us to try and maintain some sort of friendship down the road. I've been losing sleep over telling her so today I just went ahead and did it. I don't think I could ever be friends with her, because it's so easy to fall for her.

Question is, now the feelings are out and I'm 100% sure she isn't interested in anything more than friendship, when does the pain start to go away?

>>17336562 theres a girl in school i see few times a week, she is always nice and supporting in a distanted way and sometimes take a glimpse at me and giving signs of interesst in me, i never talked to her, even though i know her for few years. i just want to know her better and become friends or more. i have the feeling that she could help me becoming a better person. she is confident, always seems to be happy and a good studend, im literally the opposite. she as an aura that makes me feeling happy in my inside and i want to be close to her.
i dont have friends or someone i can talk to. there are many people who are open and want talk to me, but i dont know how to answere them or what topic we should talk about.
so how do i start a conversation or spend more time with her.

>>17336562
Everything was great we had been talking for 2 months , shit seemed legit. She loved me and I loved her , one week into the relationship and she acts distant as fuck , as if it goes it goes , which has me feeling the same way , like why care if she doesn't care. Which is only going in a downward spiral. Wtf could of happened ?