I want to be "effortlessly cool".
How do I achieve it?
>>17333985
Stop trying to be.
>>17333985
If you have to ask other people then you're never going to be
You have to master the fact of not giving a fuck, thats the main trait of coolness.
Careful with the edge tho.
>>17333985
The people in that picture look like twats btw.
>>17334003
Now lets see a picture of you.
...
Yeah.
>>17333985
i think people are just naturally cool. they dont exactly try to be it, its just the way they are lol.
people who try often make it look obvious and its cringy.
>>17334007
But they look like edgy idiots.
>>17333985
Those people clearly put effort into being cool
>Are these fingerless gloves too cringy? Nah, it doesn't matter, I'm cool I shouldn't care about what other people think. But what if I see someone else with the same gloves? What if his are newer? Or what if they're vintage? Will people think I'm weird for wearing sunglasses indoors? Wait, that could be a cool ironic thing, I think I'll do it. But is it too ironic?
After a few hours of preparing his outfit, he goes out looking effortlessly cool
Ok, let's get some actual discussion started here.
I don't think it's edgy, teenagerish or vapid to want to be "cool". If you think about it, what does "cool" mean? It's about being happy with your life and if anyone asks you "how are things?" you can actually genuinely smile back and say "it's going pretty great". And not because you're feeling mediocre and want him to think more highly of you, but because that's truly how you feel, making it the natural response to that question.
Of course, we're talking about the positive inner state that causes you to naturally project that "cool" aura, and frankly, it's who you are and how good your life is that matters, not some random coworker's opinion on how cool he thinks you are, right? To be seen as cool is merely a symptom of how good your life is, not an end in itself, because that would be a hollow victory, and it will not sustain itself.
Probably, a large part of it has to do with reducing stress. If you've ever suffered analysis paralysis, or the minor version of just "overthinking things", you'll know it makes you feel like your brain is hijacking itself, it's incredibly difficult to do anything. I think it's more about conditioning yourself to be calm in everyday situations as much as in adversity, because when has the fear and panic ever helped anyone? It could help to, in a heated situation kinda look at yourself from a third-person perspective and go "so, these are the emotions I'm feeling, perhaps I'm letting myself give in to the fear too much, where there isn't a reason to do so", just to grant yourself some control over your emotions, rather than letting them run you, so to speak.
>>17334014
You see, cool people dont mind criticism. They are just living their lives, man.
>>17333987
/thread
>>17334060
>>17333987
OP here. That doesn't make you cool. It only makes you effortless.
See pic as an example. He isn't trying, but he isn't achieving either.
>>17334003
They're vampires
>>17334015
The gloves and sunglasses is because they're vampires
>>17334101
Then be skinny have nice skin and nice hair and wear expensive high quality clothes and accessories
Done
Have a sense of fashion and stop giving a fuck.
>>17334003
>>17334014
That's Tilda Swinton and that guy who plays Loki
>>17334111
What about this guy? He is a hobo with bad everything and yet effortlessly cool.
>>17334114
>Fashion
>a prevailing custom or style of dress, etiquette, socializing, etc.:
>conventional usage in dress, manners, etc., especially of polite society, or conformity to it:
Can't be more conventional and prevailing than >>17334101. He doesn't look cool. Someone like Prince is highly unconventional (doesn't follow fashion), yet cool.
I don't think that's it.
>>17334139
That hobo is skinny, has nice skin, nice hair, his clothes look tattered yes but are oddly stylish-ish. Plus he's handsome.
>>17334139
Prince did absolutely follow fashion
Fashion is about knowing how to dress and have style not about looking conventional
>>17334139
He just looks dirty.
Is being dirty what passes for cool these days?
>>17334152
In some circles it is actually
OP, I think there are many layers to what you are wanting. Effortlessly cool people are often insecure on a deep level and work hard to project an image in order to compensate their self esteem. They build up facades in these areas:
>physical aesthetics
The look that they have must make them look good from an artistic standpoint and appeals to a certain subculture so they can enter its social hierarchy.
>undeveloped idealism
They must appear that they "don't care" this is where they attempt to look effortless. Smoking, a contrived lack of hygiene, and rudeness are all examples of personality traits they may use to bolster their image.
>self contained social hierarchy
They make friends with like-minded individuals and together they create their own little club to project a made up sense of exclusivity. This gives them validation and secures their ego so that they'll never have to take a good and deep look at themselves.
You could just try living in a way that makes you happy. Treating others with well developed internal principles and dressing in a way that makes you feel good about yourself.
There are lots of different ways to be cool. It's cool to make a lot of money. It's cool to make a difference in the world. It's cool to really enjoy what you do, be comfortable in your own skin, and be well adapted to your environment. It's cool to have hobbies that you enjoy and serve some benefit in your personal life. It's cool to make art that means something to you and it's cool to appreciate the art of others.
I know this is cliche and I know the stuff that I just described isn't going to necessarily resonate with you but you should try to know yourself/be yourself before going down the road of "effortlessly cool".
>>17333985
So very rarely is pic this related.
I'm laid back as fuck, and I'm truly anti social. I just say "Hey, what's up, how's it going, how we doing today?" and every body loves me. I have a radio voice, and face to match. I say "all right, all right, all right" and sound just like Matthew Mcstudlysixpack. Everyone thinks I'm cool as shit, but I just go home and play video games. I get a lot of party invites, though.
Usually they hit me up to hang out a few times, and then they stop coming by after I never show up.
>>17334139
Holding a cigarette the way he does is cruise control for cool
>>17334152
>just looks dirty.
No. I guess if we took a picture of you in those same clothes and equally as dirty you wouldn't look half as good.
>>17333985
Step 1) Don't try to be cool
Step 2) Become cynical as shit and let it bleed into all your choices
>step one: be attractive
>step two: gave a good eye for aesthetics (color, shape, patterns, and shit), think of yourself as an art project, a living sculpture to be clothed and posed
>step three: don't be afraid to take calculated risks
literally a matter of how attractive you are.
i'm a chick who is socially autistic but i'm skinny and take care of my appearance enough to look attractive. instead of people assuming i'm awkward, they thought i was snobby or stuck up. when i'm not paying attention because i'm stuck in my head trying not to look awkward, i'm "aloof" or seemingly "careless." if i didn't know an anime title or something (probs some moe shit), my nerdy friends would sheepishly apologize for being geeky. (even though i'm the biggest fucking anime nerd i know)
tfw too uncomfortable to express myself as the silly nerd i really am.
my current boyfriend is a prime example: good looking, big, football-loving guy with tattoos all over. looks a little shady and aggressive... when he's really just high. you would never guess he's a bookworm that loves sharing the little trivia he finds online. he is also very anal about being environmentally friendly. his older brother looks even scarier and thuggish, but he loves anime and played all the final fantasy games.
the one "uncool" boyfriend i had was unattractive, but did all the "cool guy" things because he really cared about looking cool, and ended up looking cringe-y as fuck. i remember he used to try and correct me on how to appear more normie and more "cool" because he felt embarrassed about how awkward i really was.
in reality, strangers (male and female) would literally come up to me and tell me how i can do better. some guys would even hit on me right infront of him. people gave him the stink eye for smoking too. there was this one guy who told him straight up "good luck hanging on to that one" and a cashier lady who semi-joked "you know, if she's the one paying, it means she's about to dump you". had he been better looking, they probably would've left him alone.
