Im 23, how bad is it for me to date someone who is 17?
We've been seeing each other for about a week now. Shes super cute, and her personality is actually surprisingly decent.
She showed her high-school clingy side tho the other day when she kept texting me asking me if I was her boyfriend or not, after that I kind of felt like I had to break up with her.
I hung out with her yesterday and we talked but I couldnt bring myself to do it.
She made the point that the age difference practically makes no difference. While I made the point that I dont want to date a high schooler (she has one more year), she has to use her parents cars and ask for permission to go out, and her parents think im 21 when im actually 23.
I dont know what to do. I actually really like her, but this whole situation reminds me too much of my last relationship, where my gf was 10 years older than me. We got along great, but I was always haunted by this feeling that things were never really gonna work out so eventually I had to break up with her and it was the worst thing I had to do in my life, I dont want that to happen again.
In fact, its why I havent had a gf since, for the past three years. Ive dated a good handfull of girls but I always self-destruct the relationship early on because I dont want to have to break up with them later.
Is it legal to date 17yo's where you live?
Half your age plus 7.
A 17-year-old is basically still mentally a child. This will be apparent the longer you get to know her. She also has no capability to be able to really commit to a relationship with you since she's still living with her parents and she's covering up your actual age with them. It isn't going to be a healthy relationship for either of you due to restrictions and the differences in maturity and sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
>>17316369
If I were her parents I'd kick your ass. Leave the high schoolers alone. Who the fuck hangs out with school girls anyway?
Are you Scott pilgrim?
>Half your age plus 7.
Yeah, maybe when the result is >20. A 17 year old is not mentally on your level.
She was in grade 10 last year. I want you to think about that.
My husband and I have been together since I was 18 (the summer after I graduated high school) and he was 25. It all depends on how equal your maturity levels are, though.
I dated a 19 year old when I was 24. They were nice and all, but they were still a kid and it became apparent the longer we were together. I broke up with them but I still wished them the best in life (I only semi regretted it because they were really good looking and the sex was pretty good)
>>17316730
How come you avoided using gender pronouns? It sounds like you were dating multiple 19 year olds.
>>17316632
>Tfw I'm 18 and fucked a 15 year old.
Is this ok?
Not really a good idea. She may be "mature for her age" but she's just not that experienced right now. I was in your position and it's just not worth it. Better to be firm and breakup now than later.
>>17316737
Was her body just as developed as an 18yr old?
If yes, then you are fine
If no, you might have a problem.
The whole stigma about fucking 14+ year old girls comes from older women knowing that they can not compete with younger women. Think about it, those girls are biologically ready for sex. Meaning they just became competition for the women already past their prime biologically wise.
No I dont condone breaking law and ruining your whole life. I just think its a bit backwards to shame men for noticing the biological markers in women that basically say "fresh and ready for sex". Also keep in mind women never mentally grow past the age of 16 for the most part.
>>17316932
Even if it wasnt "as developed as", there still isnt as much wrong with it once they begin to develop feminine curves.
>>17316737
Romeo and Juliet laws MIGHT help you. Might.
>>17316938
I've seen men with feminine curves, don't fool yourself into believing it's some sort of loophole you pedo.
>>17316932
I had my period when I was seventeen and no one I know had it below 15, you're just another child predator trying to make excuses, don't pretend like he results of a period are spontaneous and you automatically get double D breasts, that's just ignorant and pandering to your delusions.
>>17316932
Yeah she was developed. I just feel guilty a bit since it feels a little illegal
>>17316956
What do those do?
Nothing wrong with it.
The age difference ain't that big.
>>17316369
It's very bad when you're 23 and you're dating a 17 year old. You're saying that you aren't mature enough to date a woman, rather you'll date a girl because it's easy and you're automatically in the dominant position.
Yes, age is just a number. But maturity isn't. At your age, a difference of six years means a lot.
>>17316992
Pussy is pussy, and even though most women, regardless of age are retarded, this one could be mature.
And in the end if OP likes her who gives a fuck?
It's not like she is 15.
Go for it bro.
>>17316932
>The whole stigma about fucking 14+ year old girls comes from older women knowing that they can not compete with younger women.
Bullshit. We always can have men. Its the power of pussy. There's no fucking stigma, it's plain wrong because of real reasons and i hope all of you semi pedoshit have daughters of your own who you raise with lots of effort, time and love only for some semipedo to snatch them away from you and take advantage of their undeveloped minds.
>>17317021
>semi pedo
Actuallllly
The correct term is Ephebophile
*adjusts glasses*
>>17316369
Depends what you want out of it. If you just want sex you're kind of an asshole buy im sure you'd know that already. If you actually want a relationship, you have to basically accept that she is a child and you have to wait before she's able to fully understand what it means to be in a serious relationship. So I think it depends on the type of person you are. If you're the type who wants an innocent girl to take care of and sort of finish raising into a proper women it may work, but if you're not then my advice is to back off. And on a side note, you still run the risk of you basically teaching her to be an adult, only to leave you after all that effort, so be careful.
>>17317021
Typical female response. Can you list any real reasons? "undeveloped minds" Id say your mind is equally as undeveloped as those 14 year olds.
>>17316977
Anecdotal evidence, here let me give you some of that. I was in 8th grade and there was a girl named jessica. She had tits probably bigger than yours and had already gotten her period. She was 13 just in case you aren't familiar with the American education system.
Women are maturing quicker in recent times. Thanks to all of the hormones we put into food.
I know you find it hard to believe, but its okay. You are a female, we don't expect you to do too much thinking.
>>17316369
ITT: Autists try to justify having sex with underaged women
>itt: mongoloids claim that 17-year-olds are not ripe for sex
>>17316369
>my gf was 10 years older than me
me too man, only the dead know peace from this
>>17316977
Wtf not condoning OP but I got my period at 12, some of my classmates got theirs as young as 10 and 11
>>17316977
I had a friend in fourth grade (9-years-old) who started her period and had double d's by sixth grade. I got my period a couple months before I turned 13. At 15 I only knew one girl who hadn't started yet.
Don't listen to the jealous faggots and post wall whores in this thread berating you for dating a 17 year old.
I was exactly in your position, I was 23 and dated a 17 year old virgin 5 years ago.
We've been together ever since, though we have our ups and downs, she has been loving and loyal since. The sex is great and we are eachother's best friends.
>>17317021
I'm with you (cue the white knight accusations)
Break up with your fake highschool girlfriend.
>>17316369
I'm 24 and date a 17 year old, we started dating when she was 16 and me 23. Just go for it. I've had only 2 people in the entire year give me and hassle about it, and I couldn't care less what they think.
>>17318950
I was 86 when I dated a 12 year old. We've been together ever since, though we have our ups and downs, she has been loving and loyal since. The sex is great and we are eachother's best friends.
>>17319010
>pic related
Who can blame OP for not wanting some used up old roastie.
People say she is just mentally a child, but most western women have the mental age of a child
>>17316369
To me it is completely okay.
To me, any girl over 17 is fair game to any man of any age.
Nature decrees they are ready to be courted.
Sure, it's better if that man is in his 20s or less, but really it doesn't matter.
>>17316734
Or the sum of their ages was 19
I want you to think about it ;)
she will cuck you eventually.
I would say do it, but don't get too attached.
Its _illegal_, so thats how bad it is. But lets pretend for a moment it wasn't illegal. The standard creepiness ratio is: (Your_age / 2) + 7. The end result of that formula is the youngest person you can date without being perceived socially as "a creepy older guy chasing women who are too young for him". For you, the youngest age is 18.5, so nobody is going to approve of your relationship. Its creepy. But if you wait a while you can have her. Take this example: When Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie got together, Brad was 42 and Angelina was 30. That's an entire 12 year span in age difference, and twice that of you and your gal. At that time, Brad's youngest possible dating material was age 28, so Angelina fell within his ratio and nobody made any comments of age whatsoever. Another example: take Nickelback's Chad Kroeger and Avril Lavigne. When they got together in 2012, Chad was 38, and Avril was 28. Thats 10 years difference. At that time Chad's ratio number was 26. Nobody complained.
>>17319255
No one cares about some bullshit ratio made up by women who don't want to compete with younger women.
You're fine OP, just don't fuck her till shes 18
>>17316932
Fuck off. My best friend lost her virginity at 16 and it scared her for life. There's a good reason why these things aren't OK. Not everyone's equipped to deal with such responsibility at that age.
My cousin was in a relationship like this and we all think he's a pedophile. We're nice to his face but his social status has suffered a lot among his peers and we're just waiting for her to grow into an adult and see how much of a creep he is. He's an obviously socially stunted kiddy fucker.
>>17319255
Fuck off. No one actually abides by that rule.
>>17319276
Oh no, your friend had mental problems, quick OP, break up with her!
>>17319279
What are their ages?
>>17319291
She was 16 (or maybe like a month from 16) and he was 22/23. Going after literal kids is pathetic. He was posting pictures for her birthday "the love of my life turned 17 today <3" and "out celebrating my beautiful gf of 2 years' 18th :D <3" and it's so pathetic, here's this adult man who should be building a life for himself and he's out dating kids. He hangs out with her friends and I've heard them talk about how they think he's a creep, he looks so out of place in their pictures. And it's obvious he's going after her because he was really bad dating material. My cousin is a great girl and he was making her cry all the time, like it's so painfully obvious she was just a child, she had no emotional ability to deal with things or put herself first. She just turned 18 now and she's in some stockholm syndrome type state. I also have a lot of friends who dated older men as teenagers also and they all regret it deeply and felt like they lost out on their youth for some pathetic losers. Selfish.
>>17319306
I agree that it was weird when they were 16 and 23, but it's not really a problem now that they're 18 and 25. They only thing you said that was concerning to me was that he hangs out with her friends. Does he not have any of his own?
>>17319355
When you're in a relationship with someone you tend to hang out with their friends. He has his own and they think it's weird when he brings his baby gf around as well.
It's still creepy now because the brain is maturing until about 25 and so she's got about 7 years left before she's fully mature, whereas he was fully mature when he started dating her (a literal child in every sense of the world, legally and otherwise). He's groomed her. She will leave him once her brain develops past adolescence.
There's a huge difference between 18 and 25, if you don't think that's weird you'd have to be some sort of social retard or autist. 18 is a kid to pretty much everyone.
>>17320060
It's like if a 30 yr old starts dating someone who's 14, their relationship doesn't stop being creepy and gross the minute the younger party reaches the age of consent. It's built on something disgusting, and 18 and 25 is creepy as hell anyway. All the girls I know who dated with that age gap completely regret it and feel taken advantage of by the time they're mid 20s and have finally left their manchildren. And as a teenager if a girl dated with that age gap all her friends thought the relationship and guy was creepy and predatory.
>>17320065
>>17320060
Girl I went to school with dated a 40 year old when she was 17. AoC is 16 here, but it was still weird.
>>17316441
>A 17-year-old is basically still mentally a child
From my experience even a 25 year old female is mentally a child.
Plow that teenage pussy, OP, like I never did when I was 17.
Hi there OP, I apologize for the wall of text but I hope this helps you out and gives you some hope.
>be me, 18
>dropped outta high school, spent a lot of time on Diablo 3
>one day meet guy, says he's 27, we happen to hit it off great
>at first I thought "no, too big of an age gap."
>but then we stayed up every single night for an entire month and a half talking till 3 am and fell asleep on the phone.
>fast forward three months, we begin dating.
>things were a little rocky at first as I had never had a REAL relationship before him, but...
>three years later, and we're still together.
>I've lived with him for a little over 2 years now.
>I'm 21 now, he's 30.
>he's helping me realize my passions and pushing me to be the best I can be.
>we are each others rock.
>oh and we're engaged to be married :)
So, OP, it CAN work out. It definitely did for my fiancé and I :3 it's all a matter of common interests, levels of maturity and life goals. Some women aren't ready to commit so young, and some are. I have been fully committed to my fiancé for 3 years, and at first my family and his didn't think it would work because I was so young, but we are very very happy together and I love waking up next to him every morning.
It was hard to tell my family about the age gap but I wasn't afraid because I love him and I knew they'd understand.
If you're serious about being with her, you should consider asking her to be honest with her parents. It's really not that big of a deal, it's just 5 years, I'm 9 years younger than my fiancé, and my family was very accepting.
If it's worth it to you and you two are happy, I think that's all that matters. I didn't learn until I met my fiancé, but, as they all say, age really is just a number. Good luck OP!!!!!
>>17320083
Red pill autist detected
Your feelings do not trump scientific facts about the human brain, retard. Probably why you couldn't get teen pussy when it was actually appropriate. Men and women continue to develop until 25, with 18-year-olds only about halfway through the development the prefrontal cortex goes through during puberty, meaning they're prone to bad decisions they'll regret (such as your faggot ass) and more prone to manipulation and coercion. Adults have a responsibility not to abuse that, kids have a right to test the waters with people on their developmental level, not fully developed predatory adults or socially retarded failures of adults.
>>17320102
Come back in 5 years.
>>17316737
Legally probably not unless you have laws in your state that allow for it. If the law says yes, then I say fuck yes.
Unless the girl is a complete psycho or you guys had a bad time together, there'll be a point in your life years down the road when you'll look back and appreciate the experience.
And everyone screaming "pedo" should fuck off. There's not a teenaged human on the planet that knows jack shit during that period of their life. It's all hormones and instinct. Of course she doesn't know what she wants. This poor bastard probably doesn't either. But as long as they were safe and there's no unwanted kid as a result, who gives a shit.
>>17320104
Stop being jealous of OP plowing young, tight, virginal pussy. I've never met a "mature" 18-25 year old woman, this generation is one of mentally regressed retards stuck in high school and no amount of +1 to their age will fix that. The case is for both women and men but women have is worse, they have no reason to develop a competent, adult psyche since their route in life is comfortable and predetermined, much more so if they're pretty.
Plow that pussy, OP, plow it good. Have fun with a young, spunky teenager on the verge of discovering sexuality with your help. Show her that trick you know. ;)
>>17320115
>"Stop being jealous of OP plowing young, tight, virginal pussy."
>Thinks he is the pinnacle of maturity.
I'm not jealous of anyone, I have a "hot, young, tight" handsome as hell ambitious boyfriend at home. You're the developmentally retarded failure of an adult I was talking about.
This generation is no more retarded than previous generations. The brain is literally only about halfway through adolescence at 18, it's not "le meme" of this generation being dumber or more retarded than previous ones. It's actual verified science. At 18 people are still kids. It's creepy for adults to date kids.
>Show her that trick you know. ;)
The fact that only teenagers with no sexual experience will ever be "impressed" by you is showing.
>>17320112
>Of course this 11-year-old doesn't know what she wants. That poor 30-year-old doesn't either. But as long as they're safe and there's no unwanted kid as a result, who gives a shit.
Solid logic there brah. The fact that adults can be lost means it's ok to prey on lost children. Let's not even give them a chance to figure out their shit.
>>17320108
Sure anon, I'll come back when we're married!
>>17320137
If people are kids at 18, why do people call them adults?
Also at 22 I've met 17 year olds that are more physically developed than I am. Some of them look like 40 year old builders sans some wrinkles.
Just to verify, I'm not sure I'd fuck anyone under 20.
>>17320143
>dude is 18
>chick is 15
Way to blow things completely the fuck out of proportion. Also notice that my first and top point was that if it's illegal he shouldn't do it.
>what is reading comprehension
>>17320137
>The brain is literally only about halfway through adolescence at 18
And yet in most cases you grant them the ability to vote, consume alcohol, smoke tobacco if they choose to, drive a car, finish their formal education and go build a life for themselves. In fact, in most cases by then it's already permitted by law to have sex with them. So tell me, what's the difference between being 17 years old and 11 months, and being 18 years old? Is there a sudden change in biochemistry in the brain, making them capable of understanding the intricacies of sexual intercourse? No, they've been ready for years already - physically and mentally. There is nothing wrong with having sex with a 17 year old, since she's likely plateaued mentally for the next decade of her life, this is as close as it gets for her to being an adult.
Also, I never said you were jealous of OP plowing virgin pussy; maybe you're just jealous of the sudden competition from much younger, more fit and sexually attractive teenage girls?
