this is a discussion to have with your parents. they need to kick is ass out. it's not your job to fix his life, that is called CODEPENDENCY. take care of yourself, be there for him but don't enable him. You aren't wrong to be upset with him but you are wasting your energy.

>>17285554
The problem is that my parents like having him around and he doesn't cross the line, which is why they've kicked people out before.

I know they're business is between each other, but it just irks me that he's comfortable with this.

Hell, I had to talk him out of buying a new car. It's like he's on vacation or something.

Im in the same boat OP but i moved out. Just let your parents deal with that shit and dont let manboys drag you down.
Do not let him move in with you, its going to be the same thing

>>17285682
Oh that's definitely not happening. He's a great friend, but he's the type to pop in your room andbjust sit around and complain that "we should do something fun" for the whole day.

Not to mention other problems I have with that.

I'm just confused because I feel like as his friend I should tell him (tough love), but he's the type to get butthurt and hang it over your head forever.

>>17285716
Dude tell him and let him get mad. Once he moves or gets kicked out hes going to realise that hes the one whos being a baby and you've just been trying to help him. If he gets mad at you for trying to help you, he isn't your friend.
I know exactly what kind of person he is but you can't let these people drag you down. Some people just take a little longer to grow up, but if you decide to not tell him, give it a month or two after you've moved out and he's gonna get bored

these things are a part of growing up. stay in touch with him but find some new adult friends. Lead by example… you can't make him do anything. show him through yourself how great life can be.

>>17285542

nah man. the problem is that just being in the right doesnt fix a situation. people are who they are, and telling him he needs to either go full time or take extra classes might lead to an implosion of friendship.

do what you must though

>>17285741
Once things get finalized with my lease I'll talk with him. My mental health went to shit over the years and so I've been going to counseling and I feel like things have cleared up. But in that time I got to be pretty passive and apathetic towards people. So now, the precedent is set where he thinks this is okay, which bothers me because he's smart and has to see this as well.

But yeah, I guess I'll have to give him a talk once I get my shit settled.

Anyone have advice for being assertive with really sensitive people?

>>17285760
Yeah but isnt that for his own good? Like if you love someone you gotta let them go?

>>17285771

thats why i said 'do what you have to'. im not saying you should cater to him just because hes selfish or lazy. but im also not saying its as easy as just dropping a best friend, cuz thats tough.

do what you have to.

>>17285760
>>17285777
See that's my problem. I'm his closest friend, though at times I wonder why that is. We have a lot of differences and I just attribute it to the fact that, without being snowflake, we understand each other better than most people do.

But on top of that he's hugely self sabotaging, which is why he has unstable relationships with women and people in general.

>>17285819

>without being snowflake

people seem to think that they just happened to be born in the right place to find the right people, but the truth is you'd find your 'true love' in whatever town you live in and would find that guy where you just 'understand each other better than most people do' too.

all that nonsense aside, yeah he sounds like doesnt give a bit hoot about life and as long as hes comfortable hes happy. gotta light that fire under his ass. sucks to be come a friends parent, but one way or another it gets rid of him

>>17285824
I said without being a snowflake because (here goes) we're both gifted individuals as determined by the school system. Don't focus on that though, it just means our emotions are different.

But I totally agree that you can make it anywhere and find the love of your life anywhere. Relationships are just work and if you're willing to put in the effort (mutual) then you'll get something beautiful out of it.

>sucks to be come a friends parent
See that's what bothers me. When I've tried stuff like this in the past he likes to flip it into either
A) you don't understand
B) don't be a douchebag

Then it hangs over my head. I know I'm party to blame for letting it go on this long, but I shouldn't have to baby him. It doesn't help that it's my parents' house so I don't have the authority to tell him this without him having an easy route to path B.

>>17285542

What's the problem with chilling for 2 months? If it's just for the summer and if you're parents are fine with it then it doesn't matter how you feel.

>>17285857

>see thats the problem i tried this but he didnt respond well.

we've been parroting this back and for th to each other the entire thread mate. i doubt he will respond well. but that doesnt mean you just let him mooch off your family forever.

>i shouldnt have to baby him

babying him is letting him mooch,. talk to your parents explain that the issue isnt that hes living thereb ut that hes not reaching and get them to side with you. if he wants to stay he at least has to go full time or take the extra classes. and he should have a moving out plan. a real one not a vague one.

he will get mad and blow up, but thats life.

>>17285867

on top of the year hes already been there?

>>17285876
>we've been parroting this back and for th to each other the entire thread mate.
>he will get mad and blow up, but thats life.
You're right I'm just trying to find the easy way out.

Alright I'll talk to him when I get my lease settled for the apartment. Here's hoping I don't lose a friend.