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>>17277143
How do i find a furry gf that likes pegging

Engi back here. Guy having a Hell of a time figuring out what is up with the people I associate with. Also weird things about a girl, but that's less important.

>>17277129 #
>>17277136 #
I didn't mean for it to come across as wishful thinking. The intent was to say that shit's just strange these days. Everyone is being weird with me: people invite me for dinner, share their stock of drinks, welcome me into their homes, have me help them move. Nothing is making sense. Is this just what real friends are like?

>>17277173
>Is this just what real friends are like?
Yes, you retard

Guy to Guy question here -- How many dates should you have under your belt until you're not a complete fucking retard?

New to dating. After 26years old and being a dateless, kissless virgin. I'm now just a kissless virgin. Been on five dates the past three weeks from Okcupid chicks and frankly, I feel like I'm fucking them all up.


Guy to Girl -- Conversation. What do you like discuss when brought up? What opinions do you like to share? What do you hate to share?

>>17277173
Those are what real friends are. People thought and still think I'm dating my closest friend because of how relaxed and helpful we are of each other.

I classify these friends as 'best friends' since there are many different levels and types of friendship.

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>>17277173
>Everyone is being weird with me: people invite me for dinner, share their stock of drinks, welcome me into their homes, have me help them move.
I've never had this in my life

>Close friend roommate is bipolar, stopped taking their meds
>Said roommate has generally become lazy, disgusting, and whines if anyone calls her out
>Friend is trying to move out
>I'm trying to find a new place, she suggests we be roommates

Anyone been in a similar position? On its face it seems pretty tempting, we get along pretty well. But for the most part I've lived alone, and I'm not sure how being roommates could affect our friendship, mainly adversely.

I'm terrible at explaining things; how else can I explain what a lost cause I am to friends?

>out of highschool
>kissless virgin, the whole nine yards
>never been in a relationship
>the worst luck (past five years, three girls, around nine dates cancelled by them at the last minute)

Every time I try to explain that people don't go for someone with absolutely no experience, and why (lack of experience = shitty, most likely clingy, red flag in general, etc. from what I've been told) I get the typical friend response of: "That's not true! Nobody cares about that" when obviously that's fucking wrong, and then I get some tailor-made advice that would work for them - someone that has never had this issue. Part of it is the fact that I'm also not very attractive, interesting, etc. but I hate trying to explain that to people since 1. I feel like I'm just fishing for compliments when I'm not because 2. They're my friends so of course they're going to say otherwise

This shit comes up so much. Every time it's always: "T, we're gonna get you a girl man!" or "How come you don't have anyone yet man?" So how can I get this across a lot easier?

>>17277229
>Guy to Guy question here -- How many dates should you have under your belt until you're not a complete fucking retard?

Enough until you realize, dates ain't no big thing and stop acting like a fucking 'tard who thinks they are.

Act like a normal person, having a normal conversation, in a normal situation.

And good conversation topics for talking with girls on a first date, are basically the same conversation topics you have with a total stranger you know nothing about.

If you need guidelines, aspirations, interests, and whimsical hypothetical are a good place to go--basically anything involving the future or present. The past is fine too, as long as you stay away from weird shit like ex's, and other such landmines.

>>17277286
>I'm terrible at explaining things; how else can I explain what a lost cause I am to friends?
>I get some tailor-made advice that would work for them - someone that has never had this issue.

First kiss at 23
First date at 24
First time Sex at 24
first time relationship at 26

With all that in mind: part of this is you're being--to use 4chan terminology--a bit of an edgelord.

There is such a thing as a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you treat it like a big deal, that's what it becomes.

Anyway, relax, stop treating it like such a big deal, and stop reacting and they'll leave it alone.

What the fuck is this thread doing on this board?

>>17277143
If a guy says lol in a message what do you think?

>>17277373
Just "lol"? I think "he's either terrible at texting, or can't be fucked talking to me. Either way, I'm not going to reply".

If there's more to the message, I think nothing of it.

How can you tell a girl is whoring for attention, rather than actually being interested in you?

I usually don't have a problem with detecting this, but this one girl is so skilled at having conversations that I just can't seem to decide what's going on between us.

>>17277402
Forgot to mention, I just discovered she is MASSIVELY infamous for being an attention whore.

>>17277402
Ask her out. If she rejects you and keeps flirting with you, she is attention whoring.

Am I doing wrong being the one who always texts first, even if the girl responds quite nicely although she never takes the initiative to text first?

How would you girls feel if a guy in your class, who's mostly just an acquaintance, starts messaging/flirting with you on Facebook/something similar even though he's never had an actual conversation with you or show any signs of interest? Would it be weird or would it be totally normal?

>>17277229
>Been on five dates the past three weeks from Okcupid chicks and frankly, I feel like I'm fucking them all up.

Well I don't know what you're doing on the dates, but you're doing the learning process right, so good on you. Keep on trucking, plough through as many low-stakes bad dates as you need to while you figure it out.

>>17277229
I like to talk about my hobbies. Generally, you shouldn't probe into very personal detail too soon (as in, before the third date).

>>17277286
Your problem isn't your lack of experience, it's that you're hung up on it - and your friends are too.

>>17277603
Having a conversation on FB is ok if we haven't spoken, but flirting is just pathetic. At least have the fucking balls to talk to me first.

>>17277286

Your lack of experience will be seen as a red flag, true, but it's not an automatic fail unless you make it one.

Fuck trying to get a relationship, just go to some random bar you'll never go to again and hit on random women you'll never see again. Hit on women you don't even want. Just hit on something and get familiar with how that feels - if you're lucky you might make out with some random skank and cross 'kissless' off your list (maybe more) with no stress over "ermagad I hope she likes me."

Don't go around telling people about your lack of experience. Don't tell random skanks because it doesn't matter, and if you're obviously lying who fucking cares you'll never see them again anyway, you have to rip muscle apart to make it grow back stronger so just keep fucking going. When you graduate to women you actually care about, you probably won't even need to tell them since you'll have practiced on random skanks, but if you do, just withhold it until she gives enough of a shit about you as a person to simply ask "oh, why is that?" and have a conversation about it, rather than just noting it down on the "reasons to run" list in her head while as far as she's concerned YOU'RE still just some random skank.

>>17277409

Why would you crave the interest of a massive attention whore?

>>17277229
>Guy to Girl -- Conversation. What do you like discuss when brought up? What opinions do you like to share? What do you hate to share?
General stuff like school, life, hobbies, anecdotes, etc always works.
I like talking about politics, religion or philosophy.
I don't like talking about personal stuff at the beginning (family issues, health issues, shit like that).

In general, if I'm comfortable with someone, there's nothing I wouldn't talk about.
I hate pity and people who expect me to pity them. That's the only thing that pisses me off.

>>17277478
>Am I doing wrong being the one who always texts first, even if the girl responds quite nicely although she never takes the initiative to text first?
Depends - if she always replies and keeps conversation going, no, nothing wrong with it.
But it's pretty immature to be scared of texting first.

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Girls:

Please forgive my shitty novella formatting here but I've been up for hours and the format is making it easier for me to write this out.

Earlier today I was with my girlfriend in my bed. We have not had sex yet. We started to discuss her past sex life and her exes and she brought up one of them who she knew I was a little bit jealous of.

She then said "Don't worry, he had a tiny dick."

"Well that doesn't matter much does it?"

She smiled at me and laughed a little bit. "Well it does to a certain extent"

"How big was he?"

She then proceeded to hold her fingers about 5 inches apart.

So my problem is that my penis is below average in size, roughly the size that she showed with her fingers. What can I do? Am I completely fucked?

>>17277880

Is this girl a fucking idiot? You don't laugh about someone else's dick size with a guy whose dick you haven't even seen, what the fuck is wrong with her?

I keep on thinking about how shitty the ending of my last relationship was. He handled it so badly but it doesn't matter right? In the end I pretty much forced him to talk it out with me so I feel good about that but the last time we saw each other he was all fidgety and laughing but I know he has trouble showing emotions but it still felt bad cause for me it was a sad moment.

But anyway, with things like these it's best just to think "it's in the past, it doesn't matter anymore", right?

>>17277885
>You don't laugh about someone else's dick size with a guy whose dick you haven't even seen, what the fuck is wrong with her?
Hell it would even make me a touch uncomfortable even if a woman was aware of my dick size, because it implicitly implies that someone bigger would be even better than I.

It just seems like a really dumb topic to bring up.

Do the aesthetics of a vagina matter? What makes a vagina undesirable or ugly? (Not specific to lips)

>>17277880
It ain't the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean. It's tricky with exes because usually there is so much hate and resentment that things are said that aren't true or relevant. Or maybe he was that size, but didn't know what to do with it, so that's why it became an issue.

>>17277402
Can you ask her for a normal, friendly favor? Can you have good and long conversations that are not sexual/romantic in topic and don't just concern her life? Does she show spontaneous interest in your life without an extreme focus on your love life? Does she give you steady signals instead of being hot and cold?
These are all signs of real interest. Anything like fawning over (real life or hypothetical) other guys aorund you, fishing for compliments or for you to tell her how much you value her, showing off your friendship a lot and so on are red flags. Also consider >>17277815 and realize that even if she sincerely likes you, she's not magically going to stop wanting attention from more people than you.

>>17277478
Is this just texting or are you always more active? It could be that she likes you, just not text conversations. If you always initiate everything that's a sign that she likes you fine, but not the same or not as much as you like her.

>>17277603
I don't see the point. Start in real life. A flirty line without a face and without body language isn't the same thing at all. You want her to be able to picture you saying those things, that gives you a better shot. If you stay on the look out there must be a way to connect with her, even if it's just an assembly of small remarks/questions that give you more presence to her.

>>17277880
>roughly the size that she showed
There's your answer, she can't estimate for shit. Most women can't. She would never tell you this if she thought of your dick as small, or well, never, she'd have to be a complete sadist.
I have personally encountered this as well (size confusion). I know it sounds weird to not know how big a guy's dick is after having seen him naked a lot of times, but you're not in an objective mindset and you don't have a real frame of reference. Think of how shit most guys are at judging bra size, and then add to that that you only ever see the dicks of a sexual partner.

>>17278000
Oh shit, read the first comment and realized that you probably meant she'd never seen your dick. I just thought you said you hadn't had sex yet in the sense of, I don't know if she's going to be satisfied with the penetration now.

Still I would vouch that she has no idea what she's talking about. Size queens exist but are a vocal minority and 5" is perfectly normal, not small. I don't think below average is that significant here given how many men are around your dick size, not like it's 4". She probably hugely overestimates the size of an average dick like most women do, that doesn't mean she doesn't like them in real life and finds them hot. Plus, the thickness also matters for how big it looks (and, well, is), and matters more for feeling full during penetration.

And last but not least, I don't know how experienced she is but she's obviously young and probably still sexually immature like most young people. If the guy sucked chances are she attributed more of that to his dick than appropriate.

How do you guys deal with getting erections when a woman friend of yours gives you a hug or whatever? I'm always afraid I'll end up making things weird if they notice it or I accidentally poke them mid hug. I can't tell if I'm just over thinking things or not.

Girls, it is possible that you could fall in love with your 5 years friend, or any long term friend in that matter?

>>17278021
For me personally, I don't rule it out but I don't see it happening either. I'm a pretty reflexive person and have long considered and updated the potential with friends, concluding serious points of incompatibility. As I said I don't want to rule out 100% that I'm going to be overwhelmed by sudden feelings anyway, but I'm never going to wake up and go "wow, how could I never realize that this guy was perfect for me all along?"

Some women do, though. It is possible but if I were you I would grant yourself more than to sit around and hope for that possibility.

When is the right time to make move? Im going on a first date with a girl on thursday. Was thinking about inviting her over on date 3 or 4. Maybe try to kiss her date 2? Idk. She really likes me and weve been talking a lot the past week.

Girls:
Is it creepy or weird if a guy asks you to casually hang out and he makes a move or tries to turn it more into a date while you are at it?

Don't give the "if you think it's weird it's weird" answer.

I read that you should never actually suck on dick when giving a blowjob but I've always done it and the two guys I've done it to seemed to like it and moan more when I suck. So, yes or no to sucking a sick?

>>17278158
DICK

Girls:
Have any of you not given a blowjob? or is it something every woman does at least once in her lifetime? Is it an absolute standard for having sex to give a blow job?

>>17278131
No universal rule, it depends on your chemistry and how much signs she gives you. If she's leaning into you hanging at your every word, constantly smiling, touching your arm, being playful, it's obvious that you should go in for at least a steamy make out session at the end.

If you're exchanging pleasantries and conversation just won't start flowing by itself, some awkward silence here and there, you can't really tell what she thinks of you, don't bother attempting to go for it.

>>17278139
For one thing, this happens all the time. So it is absolutely not weird in that regard. Whether the girl in question perceives it as normal or obnoxious is personal and depends on what she's used to and how she herself is with dating. I've had a guy do this to me and did not think much of it other than, well yeah, how surprising that he wants to fuck. I told my somewhat more sheltered friend and she said he sounded like a rapey douche (not just because he tried to make a move but because of fairly normal things that come along with that like being eager about me drinking alcohol and touching spots like my thigh). It's all about her frame of reference.

>>17278165
I love oral sex but I know girls who don't give them anymore because they tried it once/twice and hated it. I am fairly sure that women who have never given them exist but are rare. It is one thing to find the idea unappealing and another to find it so unappealing that you won't try it regardless of it being seen as a completely normal thing and guys loving it.

>Is it an absolute standard
Kind of. Few guys would be okay with never getting a blowjob in a long term relationship.

>>17278158
Creating suction is good, literally sucking on it like you're sucking through a straw (with a lot of force) is not. Also make sure he's lubed.

>>17278177
Okay, well I always make the dick really sloppy with spit, I just got afraid it's been wrong how I've done it and both guys have been just too scared to tell me ;__;

Guys:
I've been trying to get my boyfriend to lose weight for months and it keeps being a case of "I'll start next week", "I'll start next week", "I'll start next week". Next week is literally the most perfect time there's been so far for him to start. If he doesn't start there, I'm considering upping my game.

I want to be abrasive, but not cutting and not leaving any lasting damage of hurt feelings. This is pretty much where I'm at right now:

>I masturbate to the thought of him being fit.
>Looking at fit men has made me hornier than it ever has in the past. I do shit like fantasise about licking a flat or toned stomach.
>Looking at him shirtless makes me frown.
>He's getting bigger boobs than me.

All of this is quite depressing and horrible, I'm not sure how far into honest territory I should be going without making him hate me or hate myself.

>>17278183
That's great, for the record, I didn't mean store lube or anything, just lubrication. Spit works fine. Nah, you have to rely on your ability to tell whether your partner's enjoying himself based on his responses and/or body signs. If you're going to second guess yourself there's no end to that, you can doubt everything.

If you want to be completely sure, ask him to "rate" you or give you tips afterwards. Do this in a playful-naughty fashion ("so how did I do professor? is there room for improvement to please you better?" if you like student-teacher roleplay for example) to keep the mood light and to allow him to give you constructive feedback in a pleasant way.

>>17278210
>hate me or hate myself

Oops, that should be 'hate me or hate himself'.

>>17278165
>Have any of you not given a blowjob? or is it something every woman does at least once in her lifetime?
It's not like you lose the title of woman if you don't suck cocks.

>Is it an absolute standard for having sex to give a blow job?
Most guys do want to get oral sex, some would be fine with never getting any.

>>17278210
Was he fat from the beginning or just gained weight while being with you?

>>17278221
He's always been a little chubby and I don't mind chubby, but this is proper man gut with boobs now.

>>17278219
>losing the title of woman if you don't suck cocks
I thought more like the opposite when I asked...

Will dating be more difficult for me if I hate modern hairstyles, won't drink alcohol, treated for depression, have dyslexia and dysfasia, is a highly sensitive person emotionally and physically, doesn't have a job due to sickleave (Depression reasons), has very little hobbies, doesn't like hanging out with dudes?

Wait, is this self-labeling?

If is, didn't intend.

>>17278294
Sounds like you have some problems of your own to work on before getting into the dating scene buddy.

>>17278294
The answer is so obvious that this must be bait

>>17278305
>The answer is so obvious that this must be bait

Is there such a thing as reverse bait?

>>17278309
yes
see
>>17278309

>>17278230
She was poking fun at the idea that sucking dick is an inherent part of femininity.

Having said that, would you like to get your dick sucked or not? What's your issue with it?

>>17278294
>won't drink alcohol

This is the least of your worries, to the point where it isn't a worry at all

Drinking alcohol more than every so often or outside of parties would probably be a detriment to a relationship

Difference between Fuck buddy and FWB?

>>17278366
One of them is a buddy you fuck and other is a friend you fuck.

>>17278366
Fuckbuddy is someone you only associate with for sex. You might not even like them.
FWB usually means you used to be friends then added sex to the mix.

This gets fucked up because people use FWB to seem coy when they mean fuckbuddy.

To women,

If you had a boyfriend of 3 years who wants you to move in, but won't accept your dog as part of his household.. Would you be fine waiting until the dog had died before moving in, or would you be thinking about ending the relationship?

I'd estimate the dog has about 5-7 years left in it, and I've offered to help re-home the dog on multiple occasions.

I already got a cat to try and get her to get rid of the dog, I'm just not a dog guy, but no problem with cats.

>>17278366
>>17278380
>>17278382
How does one go official with a FWB then?

When your emotional feelings become legitimately chemical with them or do you actually ask or some shit?

I am now a 24 year old guy and I never had a crush on anybody or anything?

Is that normal?
Would women feel strange about this?
If, how would they consider this at determining if to date me?

So I absolutely love having sex with my boyfriend, things are great, it happens regularly, no issues there.

Occasionally, depending on the position we're doing, it causes noises. Specifically noises from my vagina. All part of the fun apparently but it's a complete turn off for me and I just feel disgusting.

He is really quite big down there, I am actually quite tight so I'm not sure what the issue is. Is there anything I can do to avoid this happening?

Guys, is this a massive turn off for you during sex?

If you ask a girl out and she says "I'll call you to confirm if I can, later" should you take it as a no?

Also, unrelated, do you girls think of the idea of "alpha" and "beta" males? Or is it a guy thing? Maybe you anons do because it's a 4chan thing though.

If a girl plays hard to get and the guy stops trying is he beta for giving up or alpha for not wasting more effort in it?

>>17278383
You don't have to be a woman to know the problem of situation.
You give no fucks about what she considers important and only care about your side.
It's never gonna work out.

Possible to get GF by doing nothing BUT being myself and absolutely fucking nothing else?

This means no searching or desperation or anything like that, just minding and doing my business, trying not to die from anything while living as a human being.

>>17278410
Are you possibly asexual

>>17277986
The cute, small, pink ones only blonde white chicks have are considered cute. Pretty much every vagina other than that is not very attractive.

>>17278498
I do not think so, I'd like to make friends...
get a gf and lose my virginity

I am not very romantic though

>>17278510
I've never had a crush on anyone, and I'm in a relationship, not my first. For me a women being hot has never been enough for me to get sappy and invested. I have to get to know them, and find them interesting or understand how they think better before I get those feelings, and by then we've typically been dating.

>>17278383
It's a completely individual matter. Some women like the independence of living by yourself, and the excitement of going over to a partner's place knowing it's all their stuff and you're going to fuck and what not. Others feel the desire to move in much sooner. You should ask your girlfriend about this if you don't know it already, if you do you should weigh her desire to move in together and not ask other women, it's too subjective.

Having said that the rehoming thing would absolutely piss me off to no end. I don't know if this is rare but to me, a pet is a lifelong commitment, barring extreme cases like bearing a child who's severely allergic. Possibly if I was deeply in love with someone with an out of control phobia. I would never get rid of a dog because a guy was "just not a dog guy".

>>17278385
Usually procedure is that there's tension, you drunkenly hook up, and afterwards you mutually establish a lack of interest in a romantic relationship. Then you either agree to keep it casual, or don't agree on anything other than not getting together but hook up again later.

>>17278410
Not "normal" but not unheard of. It can still happen. Have you known a lot of girls in your life? This makes a huge difference, crushing on people you know somewhat is much more common, see also https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mere-exposure_effect People grow on you.

>>17278412
This is just air getting trapped in your vagina because of the thrusting. It happens to everyone with a pussy occasionally. How often it happens depends on the position (as you noticed), and on how much he withdraws. Make him not take it all the way out if you want to avoid it, shorter thrusts (so few inches in, few inches out, not from almost completely pulled out to balls deep) will stop this from turning you into a human whoopie cushion.

>>17278417
Personally I think that she said she'd call you (as opposed to texting) is a pretty good sign actually.

It's not a guy thing but women don't label it like that (not with fixed categories in general, but also more like losers - normal guys - outstanding guys than alpha/beta) and have somewhat different criteria. They absolutely don't divide men into innately superior/inferior ones.
And yeah, normalfag guys also don't do alpha/beta.

It is normal and a matter of self respect to not pay attention to anyone at all who's purposely fucking with them.

>>17278449
This is the best way to get a girlfriend, with one single catch: you do have to lead an active life. And with that I mean - making sure that you don't lose sight of your hobbies/interests, and that you regularly come in situations where you could potentially meet someone. Even if that's just hanging out with friends (friends have friends, and sisters, and sisters of girlfriends and so on) and once in a blue moon going to a bar. You cannot expect to meet someone special when you never meet anyone at all (or no women at all), but other than that, not arranging your life towards a hypothetical female will only benefit you. You always do better investing in what you personally enjoy and find important than catering to a perceived ideal, you have a natural advantage for the things that suit you.

I guess the way to say it is that you should keep growing/developing yourself as a person, but in the ways that appeal to you and not in the ways that you think would attract a woman. So it is both yes and no I guess.

Would you rather have a hot bf or one with a big dick?

>>17278557

Oh my goodness thank you. It's like I lay there waiting for it to happen and almost pulling back to try and avoid it happening. He doesn't even react but the entire time I'm just laying there wanting the bed to swallow me whole. I think because of his size he probably withdraws quite a lot. I'll try mentioning it to him. Thanks anon.

I'm 22 and up until now I'd never tried to get laid. I haven't been on many dates either. The sexual aspect of life always seemed to be a secondary desire that I should ignore until I got the rest of my life on the track I wanted.

Now I'm seeing a girl and sex is a possibility but I have no idea how or when to deal with my virginity. I'm sure you get people on similar situations in these threads all the time so any advice is extra appreciated.

>>17277143
She's emotionally unavailable and maybe a little bit unstable. We ended it a few days ago but she's been indirectly communicating with me through her status updates. She seems conflicted but she let me walk away. Do I just continue to ignore her or articulate my frustration and then walk away

>>17278571
Don't make it a big deal. Just tell her you don't sleep with many women because it's something important to you.

>>17278567
Don't let it bother you, I assure you he's encountered this before if he's been with more women. It's just a(n occasional) part of sex and honestly I think the "dirty" parts like the whacky noises make it hotter and more primal in a way. Be glad that you have a man who can manage to not act like a child over this, some (especially inexperienced) guys are thrown off by it when technially it's their fault even. It's just a physical process. It's called queefing, by the way, if you want to look up more and get more reassurance that this is a very normal thing.

I do encourage you to tell him, though. Chances are he's going to laugh at how much this bothered you and it'll be a weight off your chest. Things can seem really big in your head when it's just you muling them over. No problem at all!

How do I tell my boyfriend that I want to try more things in bed? I know he's going to ask me what I want to try and to be honest, I'm not sure.

I like the idea of him choking me and generally being more rough, maybe a bit of BDSM. Nothing too out of the ordinary at this stage but I just want to try something different. I want to really extend our physical relationship and push it more than we are doing at the moment, without making it feel forced.

>>17278592
just tell him to choke you and be rough with you when youre doing it

>>17278602

Yeah I know that but I'm not sure when to bring it up. I'd like us to work together to find something that turns us both on, discuss any fetishes we have, etc. I'm just not sure how to bring this up.

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Girls:

So after making out with my girlfriend for an extensive period of time I realized just how horrible I am at making out. This is essentially due to me not knowing the proper timing or even when to be in sync with her. I've got a few very silly questions to ask.

1. When am I supposed to open my mouth? When she does? Do we just return to the same spot after doing so?

2. How much am I supposed to move my lips between question 1? Do I just sit there and then wait for the next time to open them?

>>17278633
First of all, kissing is extremely personal and everyone does it more or less differently. So there is no "right" way. The only right way is realizing what your partner likes or does not like and matching to that (so not giving lots of tongue when they barely throw it in themselves).

But other than that, it doesn't matter, she can initiate or you. The important thing is to have your lips pressed on hers so that she can take the cue and move in tune with you. If you're doing it right you do this virtually simultaneously, because your lips are so sensitive you can immediately tell.

2 Depends on how you're kissing. You can give one peck after another, then you withdraw a bit (you can use this time to throw her a lustful glance, smirk, loving gaze, playful smile) and go in again. If you're doing more slow, romantic closed mouth kisses you keep your lips relaxed for optimal softness, and prolong the kiss by sucking ever so slightly. You can practice this on your finger, if you suck very slightly you'll notice there's a pleasant warm softness latched on your finger. You want that "latch" feeling.

>>17277953
>I keep on thinking about how shitty the ending of my last relationship was.
>it's best just to think "it's in the past, it doesn't matter anymore", right?

Pretty much. There are two scenarios
1.) He needs space and time to figure things out anyway
2.) He's not over you, and you doing anything to try and address that will only backfire and make him less able to let go and create needless drama.

When things are messy, a clean cut is the best. If you go back and keep picking at it, all that's going to happen is you're going to leave uglier scars, that have a potential to fester. (This is EXACTLY what is happening with my friend right now. She had to drop him, he took it hard, she keeps being an idiot and checking, so he keeps being a 'tard who won't get his shit together. I love them both, but sometimes I want to slap them)

>>17277986
>Do the aesthetics of a vagina matter?
No.

>What makes a vagina undesirable or ugly?
Improper hygiene

>>17278015
>How do you guys deal with getting erections when a woman friend of yours gives you a hug

I'm not thrusting my hips in to them, nor do I have a 10 inch cock and wear stretchy, baggy PJ's out in the world so it's not like they're going to notice.

>>17278131
>Im going on a first date with a girl on thursday.
>Was thinking about inviting her over on date 3 or 4.

How about you stop getting ahead of yourself and just go do your first date. The more you overthink shit and try to plan out events that involve other peoples emotions, the more you're going to ignore any signs, misread situations, and just fuck yourself over.

>>17278158
>Sucking a sick?

Apply the same logic to a guy sucking on your clit (or maybe your nipples).

Does it feel good? Sure.
Does it feel good if that's the only thing that they do/if they do it too hard? You get desensitized and it starts to get painful after a while.

>>17278654
This actually is pretty useful, thank you
my only last question is what exactly is "in sync"? opening mouths at the same time? I seriously suck at this shit so explain it like I'm 6

>>17278210
Bumping this.

I've done a little bit of introspection on this. He's the only person I've ever dated and I genuinely consider him to be the person I'll spend the rest of my life with. He's had a lot of girls. Girls with big boobs, girls with little boobs. Girls with big asses, girls with small asses. I just feel a bit deflated that he's had the entire spectrum of attractive women and I don't think I'll ever know what it feels like to touch a fit, slim body. Sorry if that sounds horrible, it's just why I think I find this such a big deal.

>>17278691
You're welcome! Yeah, that's what I mean. Think of it like a hug. One person initiates, but the other one seems where you're going so the end result is that you lightly press into each other more or less at the same time. Or a handshake, same thing, you give pressure at the same time. When you're kissing (as in, your lips are on hers and you're clearly not withdrawing any second) put light pressure on her lips to part them, she'll follow suit. Like, sort of nuzzle your lips in between hers, she'll catch on so you don't actually pry open her mouth with your lips but she starts doing her part, like a dance. Is that clear or am I making it sound more complicated still now?

How do you deal with people that ghost you but keep you on social media. Is it petty of me to unfollow/friend them?

>>17278654
That's a really cool explanation. I'm not the other anon but I have a question: How do one person's lips match the other person's? I mean in what position, tilted sideways in opposite directions a bit? interlocking (your upper lip, then ther other person's upper lip, then your lower lip, then the other person's)?
I agree it's a personal thing, I remember watching that Carmen Electra show on MTV and she kissed super weird to me. And I've only kissed one person once ever. I always wondered why no one (except finally you) was ever able to actually put "how to kiss" into words. Everyone else just gives stupid "let go, feel the moment" kind of advice. You rule!

>>17278697
I'm not a guy but I do not think those things would motivate anyone. I don't necessarily think that he'll hate himself (that depends on his self esteem), but I do think it's more likely short term that he loses confidence with you (eg does not want to have sex anymore, doesn't want to undress around you) than that he's going to amp up his efforts to lose weight.

The way I see it all you can say is what you said in your bump, really. I would not bring his women into it, that's just likely to make him defensive. But you can absolutely tell him that you both want to be with just him for the rest of your life, but you also want to be with a fit man and know what that's like.

If that doesn't work I'm afraid that you're going to have to choose between the two anyway. It is a big commitment to lose weight, especially if he needs to lose a lot. It is one thing to work out, but to really lose significant weight you need to alter your diet and that is a commitment that is not just daily, but pops up in many forms throughout every single day. That's not something that you can easily do as a favor, and by far most people who manage do so because of a complete and thorough conviction that this is what they need to do, they are sick of being overweight, it's time to make a change in their life etc. It does not sound like he's there yet by a long shot. Just my thoughts, sorry that they're kind of depressing.

>>17278724
Pety? No.
This may make them butthurt but i don't think it matters.

>>17278210

You're not going to want to hear this but:

You can't make anyone do anything they don't want to do.

The most you can do, is try and make him want to do it.

The way to do that, it entirely depends on his personality.
Maybe some positive reinforcement like mentioning a hint of your fantasies and the things you'd do to him
Maybe being sympathetic and offering/suggesting how fun if it would be if you went together
Maybe negative reinforcement and trying to shame him in to it (This is ALWAYS the most likely to backfire btw).

Who knows, every one is different and values different things. Point is, this needs to be something he finds appealing.

If he doesn't though, he just doesn't, and there's nothing you can do.

>>17278412
>Depending on the position we're doing, it causes noises from my vagina
This is commonly referred to as a "queef", and it happens basically because his cock is large enough and your vagina is tight enough it creates a seal. When he pulls back/out he's letting air in, when he thrusts he's pushing that air in to you until eventually that compressed air wants to escape, which results in it trying to rush out under pressure, creating noise.

Nothing you can do about it except maybe try to get him to be more aware with his positions.

However,

>Guys, is this a massive turn off for you during sex?

No fucks given. If you think about it, it's more like an ego boost for most guys if they actually know what it is and why it's happening.

>>17278417
> "alpha" and "beta" males?

Not a girl but funnily enough, I don't at all believe in this shit, but my girlfriend does.

According to her, she thought i was actually "beta" at first, until our third date where apparently I did something that made me 180'in her eyes and she was just like "wtf?" with how "alpha" I was.

^
And that is exactly why I think it's all bullshit.

P.S. On our first date she'd basically already fallen for me. "alpha", "beta" bs had nothing to do with anything.

>>17278727
From my experience what usually happens is that one person (typically the one who initiates the kiss) tilts their head and the other person keeps it more upright, if they tilt it a bit as well it is indeed in opposite directions. This allows the person who (really) tilts their head to have more control over the depth of the kiss and take a more active role. (Even if "active" just means that they set the tone/pace for the kind of kiss.) Now that I'm thinking about it I think that if both people were to really tilt their head, it would feel like your faces are oddly turned away from one another a bit, whereas if you don't tilt noses and front teeth make things awkward. It is also common to take breaks where you switch positions or tilt your head the other way, to catch your breath and so that you can go at it again with renewed enthusiasm and a slightly different starting point. (Eg, the other person starting and initiating a more frantic making out.)

Personally I always go for under and from the one time I saw this asked online that was the consensus as well. This is nowhere near a hard rule but to me the upper lip just kind of seems more like their mouth (as opposed to just a lip), also because most people have a plumper bottom lip. Also less close to the nose which can matter depending on their proportions and the size of their face.

Yeah it's pretty much freestyle, especially what you do with your tongues. You can just go round and round or go crazy and try all sorts of things including playful stuff just to fuck with them (tickling the rooth of their mouth with your tongue for example). It's just a way to relish in each other's closeness whichever way you like. Thank you! Hah, that is definitely true and used to make me so nervous...

>send racy/silly pic (me, nude, with a fake beard covering my boobs)
>guy reacts with "hahaha are you naked??"
>goes silent after that

He isn't interested, and I can just stop talking to him, right? I'm sorry, this is the first time I ever liked a guy and I am sad and confused by his reaction.

>>17278761
>upper lip just kind of seems more like their mouth
Way to make things confusing, *bottom lip of course.

>>17278766
The image of him confused trying to figure it out if you are naked or not made me giggle.
This is confusing but it sounds like he is a retard.

>>17278761
Thanks!

>>17278571
>how or when to deal with my virginity.
This is one of those things where 95% of the time, the fucks given by them is proportional to the fucks given by you.

Pretty much you're IDGAF and chill about it, so will they be.

>>17278592
>How do I tell my boyfriend that I want to try more things in bed? I know he's going to ask me what I want to try and to be honest, I'm not sure.

>Are making out/whatever leading up to sex
"Hey, do you want to try something new?"
*provocative/shy/coy/whatever smile*
"I think it'd be really hot if you did <x>"

And if he's asking, just tell him.

>>17278703
It's a bit confusing but I think I'm keeping up. I suppose I just really need more practice. Thanks for the help anon!!

>>17278773
>This is confusing but it sounds like he is a retard.
Thank you, thank you, I don't know if it's true but if made me feel better to read that.

>>17278817
Practice is always the best teacher. No problem and good luck!

>>17278766
Did you reply to his question, or was that the last message sent between you two?

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One of my housemates have started to develop quite a close friendship that is heavily laced with flirting and tension of a sexual nature. We get along really well and when we're not chatting we're usually tagging each other in stuff on Facebook.

I'm moving out in a month. Would it hurt to give it a go? She at the very least attracted to me and would not be the least bit offended if I went for it.

I'm not sure why I'm asking this to be honest. I know I'm going to do it anyway because the pain caused from regret is much worse than the pain of rejection.

>>17278887
I said "maybe!" and then he went silent.

Girls, i need an honest response here.

What are your views in introverts, if one of them approach you an start talking (with silence gaps here and there), would you be uninterested?

Also, can good looks (hairstyle, proper trimmed beard and dressing) interest you if he lacks muscle (and was a little bit overweight)

>>17278899
That's strange, but it's not necessarily game over yet. I'd try flirting with him again, and if he doesn't respond again I'd drop it.

>>17278914
>What are your views in introverts
They're half the population. I'm not interested in people who make being an introvert their entire personality

>if one of them approach you an start talking (with silence gaps here and there), would you be uninterested?
I don't mind if anyone approaches me, as long as I'm not busy, they have a reason to talk to me beyond hitting on me (unless in a situation where that's normal and expected), and he can hold a proper conversation. If there are silences, then I'm probably going to make an excuse to get away. Being an introvert doesn't mean you can't hold a conversation, so it's not like that's an excuse

>Also, can good looks (hairstyle, proper trimmed beard and dressing) interest you if he lacks muscle (and was a little bit overweight)
Maybe, but it depends on what his face looks like, and what 'a little bit' overweight means

>>17278620
Take MojoUpgrade together. It will be fun and show you what kinks you have in common.

Ladies,

I'm taking this girl out on a date thursday. I want to get her flowers. We've dated a couple times in the past, but I was an idiot and blew it. A year has passed and she still wants to see me. I want to see her too. Her birthday was last friday so I sent her flowers at her work (which she loved). Am I being too much of a hopeless romantic by bringing her flowers again on our date? I'm probably over-thinking things, but I want a ladies opinion.

>>17278914
>What are your views in introverts?
I am introverted myself and dating extroverted people is almost painful for me.
I like the feeling of having someone I can be alone with.

>with silence gaps here and there
Being introverted doesn't mean being socially inept. I expect my partner to be able to keep a conversation, if you can't I won't consider you as a partner.

>Also, can good looks (hairstyle, proper trimmed beard and dressing) interest you if he lacks muscle (and was a little bit overweight)?
I don't care about muscles, but I care about healthy weight and nice style and a overall cute face.

>>17278914
>What are your views in introverts

Male anon but,

You're aware "introvert" means socially reticent, not socially inept or awkward right?

From: A social introvert.

Just get out there, get socially adjusted, and keep going.

Social skill is trained, not a set trait you're born with, so the more you do it, the more exposure you give yourself, the better you get.

Girls : are you interested in plurality sex ? (threesomes, gangbangs, swinging etc) if you've never done it, would you like to try at least once ? if you like that, would you be comfortable to do some with your bf ou you only do it when you're single ? if you're against it but your bf like it, that would be a dealbreaker ?

>>17279008
>are you interested in plurality sex ?
I find the fantasy sexy.

>if you've never done it, would you like to try at least once ? if you like that, would you be comfortable to do some with your bf ou you only do it when you're single ?
Problem is - I wouldn't do it with my boyfriend, but I wouldn't fuck a stranger. So I wouldn't do it IRL, no.

> if you're against it but your bf like it, that would be a dealbreaker ?
No, but I wouldn't do it.

>>17279008
>Girls : are you interested in plurality sex ? (threesomes, gangbangs, swinging etc) if you've never done it, would you like to try at least once ?
Nope

>if you're against it but your bf like it, that would be a dealbreaker ?
Yes. Monogamy is very important to me.

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On a scale of 1-10, how okay is it for me to go out with multiple hickeys on my neck?

The gf does it to embarrass me and I'm always too in the moment to stop her (it's cute anyway)

>>17279019
>>17279025
thanks ladies ! i thought it was more common for girls to dream about multiple guys only for them, guess i'm wrong so far !

>>17279031
why are you embarrassed ? it's just cute, a bit childish but cute, i wouldnt care at all or i'll probably find it amusing.

i'm a guy btw.

>>17279036
I just don't want weird or dirty looks from people. Like will I ever get asked to leave from somewhere? I never see people with hickeys on them so I have no idea how people would react to it.

I've never had a gf who was this into hickeys so I just don't know how to deal with it.

>>17279031
For once, eh, I'd be amused to notice it. If I studied with you or worked with you and noticed you had them all the time, that's not great.

>>17279036
The thing is that hickeys are very easy to avoid even with lingering neck kisses, so if you show up with them all the time it's a bit obnoxious. There is no reason to have them in a visible place. If she wants to give hickeys, she can give them on another bodypart. If she wants to kiss his neck, she can go all out without leaving hickeys, barring nothing but sucking hard.

It does not help that the only cases I know of wearing hickeys (more than an occasional slip up) is teenagers who think they are cool because it shows off to everyone that they had ~sex. That's not really an association that you want. They are also seen as unprofessional.

>>17279044
>Like will I ever get asked to leave from somewhere?
hahaha no dude wtf ? of course not !
And just be yourself stop caring about what other people will think about you if you have hickeys or an haircut they don't like, of if they find your tee-shirt weird, of if they don't like your shoes whatever bro, fuck them, live your life, be happy and be comfortable with yourself and PDA.

>>17278139

I'd find it creepy. It's spineless, I don't like it when people aren't honest with me, and I don't like people who take advantage of the trust I give them as a friend and then try to blindside me into giving them romantic affection. Like I'm a wild boar they're trying to wrangle, "come at her slowly from the side, or you'll spook her!". Just fucking ask me out if you want that.

That said, if it's a situation where it's just like "Hey, you wanna 'hang out' or like you know whatever," and it's obviously pretty much a date, that's fine.

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>>17278210
You should tell him to do 2 miles a day and do sit-ups and push-ups daily to get rid of that flab. I personally do this almost everyday. I am starting my senior year in highschool (already 18 don't worry) and since the end of my junior year I've been doing 50 sit ups and a minimum of 30 push-ups nonstop followed by a relaxing 18 minute 2 mile. And desu in all seriousness I AM A Lazyass. Not going to lie, I hate running sometimes and I hate the fact of working out, but I do it for my health and body regardless. So I think you just need to tell him straight up to do some simple exercises everyday and he'll be good in no time.

>>17278383
>If you had a boyfriend of 3 years who wants you to move in, but won't accept your dog as part of his household..

Bye bye, boyfriend, it was nice knowing you, don't let the door hit your ass on the way out.

>>17278383
>and I've offered to help re-home the dog on multiple occasions.
>I already got a cat to try and get her to get rid of the dog,

Dude, go FUCK yourself.
If she doesn't want to do it she doesn't want to do it. Leave it alone.

And why the hell would getting a cat make her give up her dog anyway?

>>17279112
>Hey babe, forget about your aunt, my cousin will leave with us.

>>17279121
Live*

Should I tell girl I'm friends with that what I'm inviting her for is date on the phone or after we already saw each other in person?

>>17277986
I've seen very few vaginas that I wouldn't put my dick in. 95% of vagina is absolutely beautiful.

>>17278944

Would the birthday ones be kind of wilted by now? If so, seems like perfect timing to bring a fresh bunch to 'replace them'.
If the previous flowers were still totally fresh, then it might feel like a bit much, but if the timings right it sounds really cute.

>>17278750
man I do not think I would've continued dating a girl if she categorized ppl in such a black and white way

>>17278766
>>17278899
Is he socially handicapped?
If he is, what exactly were you expecting? Something smooth?

>>17278952
When people say "introvert", they usually mean strongly introverted, ie enough to make it a part of their basic description (eg if everyone describes a guy as "the tall guy", he's probably very tall, not just kind of tall).

>>17277143
I broke off contact with all of my friends 2 years ago, how do I approach them again? One of the girls of our group has always been pretty neutral towards me and I honestly think it would be best to contact her.
Do I start with an apology for being so dumb and rude 2 years ago or just a simple "hey what's up, it's Anon from 2 years ago".
I'm really sick of being alone all the time.

>>17279189
Just to chime in but his response is a pretty typical reply to deflect a blatant come on if he's not interested. I don't know what the norm is but the guys I know my age won't just go for any girl. Not because they're fucking a new girl every month, but there can be reasons. Thinking she has a crush on you that you don't reciprocate, not finding her attractive, being in the early phases of dating someone else...

On a scale of 1-10 how bad is it for a 22 year old guy to not have a car, ladies

>>17279201
Yeah, apologize. If you didn't sincerely hurt someone's feelings you at least offended someone and owning up to that is no more than taking responsibility and showing that you grew up since then.

Don't expect them to welcome you back with open arms. Especially if you were obnoxious about being done with them.

>>17279208
I'll give you the bump/visibility but where I live no one around my age owns a car. Small European country with good public transit. So I don't think I can really weigh in there.

>>17279210
I just feel like it would come across as silly 2 years after the fact out of the blue. Should I just try to take up normal contact again and if it comes up own it and agree that my behaviour was stupid? I've had this conversation a million times in my head already, I think I've grown up quite a bit since then and I'd just like to leave that behind me and talk to them normally.

>>17279217
Thanks. And I live in America, urban environment with fantastic public transportation but y'know, "status symbol"

>>17279208
Depends.
I live in a place where you can't do shit without a car - I'd have to pick you up before and after dates. That'd be off putting.
If you live in a place where you can move around without it, I wouldn't care.

>>17279220
No, that's obnoxious. That it's two years ago doesn't matter much because you didn't interact with them in the meantime, so it's the freshest memory they have of you personally and that's all that's relevant.

It just shows respect and a sense of self reflection to not put the onus on them to point out that you were rude and somehow make it into their deal to initiate that conversation if they wish to. If you are too proud to say sorry for doing something cuntish then good luck with not being alone in life. I don't even mean that in a snarky way but in a sincere way. Not being alone means not just accounting for your own feelings and showing some flexibility and willingness towards others' expectations of you. Friendships are also relationships. You walked away, it's been two years, you want back in, come back with a story. Acknowledge that you backed out.

>>17279221
Huh. I don't know what the economy there's like if a car seems like a remotely reasonable possession for a twenty two year old, status symbol or not... honestly, if someone my age had a car I would assume it was a gift from daddy and just think it was sweet for him and nothing more.

How do I get my girlfriend (20) to become active and tone her body? We are in a long distance relationship and I'm also slim but still working out and making am effort to beef up. She is aware she has gained weight by trying on clothes from a few years ago and says she needs to lose a few but it seems like she doesn't make an effort. I think I'm becoming more attracted to fit girls because I like the idea of me being physically bigger than her and am afraid it will become a problem. How do I get her to become active without myself being there with her?

>>17279241
Also I should include that my responses are assuming that these guys were actually friends with you, and/or that you made some sort of statement cutting contact.

If you are talking about a group of people you used to hang out with, none of them knowing you well personally, no one on one contact, and you ghosted them without anyone really caring, obviously you can return and see if they want to hang out without anyone caring.

>>17279252
You can mention that you'd like it if she did it, something like "oh cool, I'm doing this new work out thing, we could long distance-do it together and compare results to keep each other motivated" ("results" as in, telling the other one whether you managed to go through with your plans for that day).

And that's your only option. Nagging does not motivate anyone, obviously at the end of the day she doesn't care enough to feel that motivation by herself, and you can't even hide behind "I want you to be healthy". So you can do the above and if that fails, break up with her and find someone who is more athletically inclined. Or let it go. Dating someone while trying to make them into a 2.0 version does not ever work out.

>>17279189

And by preference I spend the vast majority of my free time at home reading books, playing video games, whatever, and choose not to go to parties, clubs, whatever because some times it just feels like it'd be a pain in the ass to go out.

Still, doesn't mean I can't socialize easily and openly, be charming enough to make new friends with total strangers at a bar/party/wherever, or go out an enjoy myself in general. It also doesn't mean I don't love being with my girlfriend and enjoy spending time with her.

All introverted means is that I have a tendency towards solitary or more intimate/private functions and need tons of "me" time to recharge after doing something super social because--regardless of if I enjoy it or not--it's mentally taxing.

An example of the opposite:
I have a friend who absolutely NEEDS to be with someone at all times. He can't at all live alone and always has to have roommates/friend over/not be at home alone because he just starts to go stir crazy and will instantly start calling everyone to see if they're doing anything the second he's alone. It's the opposite for him, and being alone is mentally draining.

None of that has anything to do with social competence. Just because you're introverted, it doesn't mean you have to be awkward.

>>17279220
>I just feel like it would come across as silly 2 years after the fact out of the blue. Should I just try to take up normal contact again and if it comes up own it and agree that my behaviour was stupid?
Not that anon but, it depends on what you did.

If it was something that was bad, apologize. At the worst it'll probably sound some what sincere if it's coming out of nowhere and you truly mean it.

Because if someone fucked up big to the point I didn't want to talk them anymore, and then the next time we talked they tried to play it cool with me as if nothing ever happened and they never fucked up... I'd just pretty much just be like yeah.. No. Fuck off.

>>17279241
>>17279253
>>17279264
Basically, I got fed up with them and told them that I'm breaking up contact with them back then. The girl I'm talking about even said stuff like "just take your time and calm down and in a few weeks we'll be sitting together at the bar again". It just took a bit longer than a few weeks....

>>17279283
I still feel the same way. I will readily admit that friendship is serious business to me, but if a friend (also a not that great friend) took the time to tell me he was done with me, then got back to me after two years to go "hey, sup" I would frankly be offended that they even thought I'd roll with that.
I also don't see why it's such a big deal to admit by yourself that you don't look back on it the same way.

>>17279291
I have no problem admitting that, at all. I just think it could come across really needy or weird bringing it up out of the blue like that. Lukey talking about it would be totally fine, but literally starting the conversation with that after 2 years of silence seems odd. Also, what if she just forgot? What if it wasn't such a big deal for them as it was for me?

>>17279298
I doubt that they forgot that you were not around for two years. What did you tell them exactly? Only that you broke contact or more than that?

It would not really be out of the blue though, it would explain why you are coming back to them after all. Sure there's the thing that it took you two years, but you can blow that off with time and maturing and gaining distance and new perspective. It is weirder to me to not have any introduction, like no time passed at all.

>>17279309
Well, we were all drunk and it ended more like "fuck off I'll never talk to you again", but they obviously knew what was up, hence her response IMO.
Sure, I wasn't around, but they have other friends. And I don't. For me it was an incredibly important decision and for them it probably wasn't. It wouldn't surprise me if they forgot or just didn't think much about it anymore.

>>17279317
Hmmm. For me there's two sides to this. The first is that the situation is not that bad. Drunk fights happen, not like you made a big shows out of spontaneously telling everyone that you were done with their shit. That's manageable.

The other part though, is that I think you kind of fall prey to an error in thinking people with low self esteem and/or unhappiness in life often do. It's like you think you're being realistic or on the humble side or whatever to make yourself small in other people's lives - I was probably not important to them because who am I? They had and have lots of friends, why should they care for me?
When really you are not just minimizing your importance but also their feelings. You don't get to say that because they had other friends they couldn't have been sincerely upset about losing you. That is presumptuous and all around not your place. It might still be true, but it is not up to you to decide that beforehand. You have to make room for their side of the story and see whether they care or not.

New advice adjusted to extra information. I would start cautiously, don't go in with a grave sincere apology but do bring it up yourself. Like a "hey, did anyone miss me?" that they can take playfully (if they did not really) or as an opening to talking about wtf happened (if they did). Works best in person though so tweak it if you have a better idea, it's more about the level of nonchalance versus seriousness.

Also, just wanted to say before heading to bed that it sounds like a good plan. Not to be rude but it sounds like you've had too much time to be locked up in your own head.

>>17279378
I would never start the message that way, but I'll think about what you said. Thanks.

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>Starting messaging girl on dating website
>It's going well
>Suddenly she stops messaging back, but has been online

I don't get it. What the shit could I possibly have done?

>>17278210
Weight loss is a significant thing. If he does it just to appease you, the moment your relationship hits a bad spot his enthusiasm for those major changes he would have to make would collapse. You have to make it so it's something he wants to do, rather than something to make you happy.

One thing that redoubled my focus was my grandfather. The man was always obese, but it's become a lot worse in his old age. He can barely walk, he's constantly in pain, and you could write a novel on all of his health issues.

>>17278750
>According to her, she thought i was actually "beta" at first, until our third date where apparently I did something that made me 180'in her eyes and she was just like "wtf?" with how "alpha" I was.
Doesn't that feel a touch insulting? Like she's not really looking at you for you but some stereotype about what she thinks alpha and beta is.

>>17279247
It's often not reasonable at all, but it's seen as a milestone. I've seen a lot of women who are neets expect a guy to have his own place/ride, which always made me laugh a bit.

>>17279521

It's online dating.

My average record over 2 years was probably something like:
Browse 1,000 profiles
Message 400 women
Get responses back from 200
Have an actual conversation with 50
Go on dates with 20
Get 1 girlfriend.

>>17279544
>Doesn't that feel a touch insulting? Like she's not really looking at you for you but some stereotype about what she thinks alpha and beta is.

Not really, I don't own her and don't require her to think the way I think. She's my partner, not my clone or my toy (and like I said in the first place, it was pretty clear we were in to each other on our first date, before the alpha beta switch thing).

To be honest, any time she brings it up I just think it's kind of silly and roll my eyes, but I also think the same thing about her being so into astrology, and she probably thinks the same thing any time I talk about personal privacy/anonymity, theory-crafting, and whatever else esoteric things I subscribe to.

I respect her ability to have her own mind and don't look down on her for it; she thinks what she thinks, and I do too. If anything, it's kind of the opposite where I get more annoyed when she caves and just gives up on what she believes because she doesn't have confidence in it.

She's her own person the same way I am, and what's what makes her awesome and us awesome together.

>>17277986
At the point someone sees your vagina the aesthetics don't really matter as long as it's cleaned up down there.

Ok, I know this is probably going to sound stupid but here it goes:

There's this girl I know from highschool, we recently started texting again (yesterday), after about a year. Just talking about stupid shit, (how have you been, how's school etc.) She seemed pretty excited but I don't know if she was just being friendly.

Back in highschool she seemed to be interested in me but I was and still am a complete autist so I don't know. Her friends would always ask me if I was into her etc.

What does these things mean and what should I do. I really like her and don't want to fuck things up.

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Kissless virgin here. Tried probably a bit too hard to get laid or basically get any sort of "action" this past year and I'm still a kissless virgin. My standards have gotten so low to the point of no return. I'm beginning to think that girls say that they want guys that care, but the majority of them are usually busy crying/stressing over guys that don't care.

How do I stop caring about having my first kiss/losing my virginity? I'm tired of going through the same cycle of failure every time I think a girl is into me and things will change this time.

How do I tell my girlfriend that one of the reasons I find her attractive is her low intelligence?

Girls, how would you want your boyfriend to break this to you, assuming you already believe that about yourself and admit it?

Guys, how would you do it?

>>17279685
Is that really one of those things you should tell her. I don't see any way of that going down well unless she's so fucking stupid she doesn't understand the words you're saying.

Anyone who uses/has used POF can answer this, but I'm mainly looking for answers from heterosexual males.

Have you ever upgraded your account? If you have, did it make any objective difference at all? Doesn't have to be a direct improvement to your dating life; even minor changes and detrimental changes, anything you can think of.

>>17279685
Tell her that you like her for her intelligence.

Do note that you're saying you like *her* intelligence. You're still getting the point across.

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Male here (22) having trouble with a female co-worker here (18) and I don't know how to handle the situation., need any input:

>new female co-worker, she's not in my team and we don't work on the same projects
>we hang out at lunch from time to time
>I like her enough to ask her out for the weekend
>she agrees, then gives me a bullshit excuse some hours before our date
>I obviously get butthurt

>next week, I try to start ignoring her but she keeps starting conversation with me
>SHE mentions that she owes me a date, then basically tells me she wants to go to the movies
>we schedule a date again
>weekend comes, same shit happens
>I get even more butthurt

>this week I seriously start ignoring her, deleted her from my contacts and shit
>she keeps starting conversation with me
>she points out that we stopped going to lunch together
>I make bullshit excuses like "I'm too busy"

Don't know what to do, the problem is we used to hang out with other people at lunch and now the other people might start to realize I'm butthurt for some reason.

I won't like to you, I had some interest in this girl and I'd definitely go out with her if I could but I basically got rejected twice and I'd rather forget about it.

Apparently this grill is dating another 18 year old dude but why would she accept my dates in the first place, why are grills so mean.

>>17279659
Start being an asshole, plain and simple.

>>17279733
Congratulations. You've finally figured out that most teenaged girls are dumb and flighty.

Your biggest mistake is playing along with her. You shouldn't have planned that second date, and you shouldn't have made excuses about your own absence during lunch.

You should've told her that you don't want to talk to her during lunch because she's dumb and can't keep promises.

>>17279698
It kind of seems inevitable. I mean I'm not going to lie to her, so if she asks and I'm unable to deflect then there it is. But should I even deflect? Or is it better to be upfront?

>>17279731
That might work. Hmmm. Very clever.

>>17279685
The next time she says something stupid, say to her "You're so dumb" or "You're so silly" in a cutesy tone, then follow it up with "But that's why I love you"

>>17279653
Just go for it.

If you never go for it, or if you take too long, it'll never happen.

Yes, there is a chance that if you go for it, she'll turn you down harsh. That is a possibility, and I assume that is exactly what you're worried about.

So we see a "damned if you, damned if you don't" scenario.

All the more reason to go for it. If you're already assuming that there is a 0% chance of success, then you've got nothing more to lose.

Do you think I go to the casino and chicken out as soon as I sit down in a game? No, and I actually stand to lose something from that scenario. You have nothing to lose.

Your gamble is a safer gamble than an actual gamble.

>>17279742
>You should've told her that you don't want to talk to her during lunch because she's dumb and can't keep promises
I can't tell her to go fuck herself either, I work in a corporate office where communication and relationships are important.

Luckily I don't eat lunch everyday at work because I have to visit clients and shit.

>>17279756
>Teehee, Anon, how come I never see you during lunch?
>How come I never saw you on our last two dates?

>>17279753
That's an excellent point. I'm gonna do it, thanks.

>>17279735
I mean wouldn't it be weird to just change up like that so quickly?

>>17279768
Not particularly. In fact, it'll actually help you "stop caring about having [your] first kiss/losing [your] virginity."

You didn't get any action this past year and every year before that. This probably happened because you're not a particularly remarkable guy. You're a nice guy, and you're not very picky about women, but there are thousands of guys just like you.

You're like a plain cheese pizza. You're palatable, inoffensive, and you don't particularly set off any triggers. You lack any controversy, but you haven't really done anything to make yourself desirable.

No one noticed you. Changing abruptly won't weird anyone out, because they never gave a shit about you before. They sure as hell will give a shit about you once you change.

>>17279788
I mean i've always been known as that funny guy and girls always tell me that girls like funny guys but obviously it isn't true. How do I use this to my advantage? Hasn't been working too well so far desu lol.

>>17279685

What exactly is it about her low intelligence that's attractive to you? Does it make you laugh, is it low maintenance, does it make you feel better about your own intelligence, does it make her more open minded and fun to explain things to/learn things with, etc?
Don't just tell her that she's dumb, explain why it's a positive for you.

>>17277229
just try to have fun, ask questions that can't be answered in a single sentence or yes/no type of answers
>>17278015
are you 12? i don't think i've ever gotten an erection from a hug
>>17278210
people that don't workout are hard to get working out (source: i'm a lazy chub). he has to be self-motivated, doing it to please you is only going to go so far
>>17278412
sound comes with the territory of sex
>>17278592
>"I want to try more things in bed"
>>17279728
nothing PoF offers is worth money
>>17279733
don't get bent up over one flakey girl, many more will also flake on you in the future

I'm a math student and I met a genomic science student on saturday during a class.
I've heard of her before and I saw her once before on a party but I was way too drunk to speak to her, the point is that we spoke a bit and boi she got me, I've been thinking of her ever since.
But I have a problem: She is wayyy to smart (Went to IMO and EGMO) and she only dated other smart people and I have no clue how to speak to date her and also she is two years older.
help im desperate

>>17279733

There's not a huge need to be butthurt now. The first time, yeah, because it looks like a rejection which sucks. But the second time proves she's just a flake.
Still annoying, and you're well within reason to not want to mix with her, but there's not really a need to take it personally, she most likely does it to everybody.

Ladies,
Am I a man child for living with my mother and father? If I told you this, would it be a turn off?

should I bother asking a girl out if she is gonna go study abroad for a semester this fall? I feel like she'd give me a chance if she wasn't already going to leave in 2 months.

>girl A knows im dating girl B
>tired of relationship with girl B, want to ask out girl A (have been dating girl B for ~6 months)

so if i break up with girl B how long do i wait before asking out girl A to make it seem like i didn't do it just to ask her out? feels like that would make her feel weird

>>17280053
depends what you're doing. if you're unemployed and living with your parents, ya it's kind of offputting. if you're working and saving money to move out, then it's fine. if you're going to college locally and commute then it also fine

if youre still living with your parents you arent ready for a "real" relationship though. you're ready for a kid relationship, which is fine if you're still in that age bracket (18 is the max you can be and this be ok). wait until you move out before seeking relationships

>>17280053

I'm 25 and 90% of the people my age that I know are still living with their parents, housing is expensive yo.

I just went out on a date with a girl and she really likes me and I really like her and we kissed and it was great. But shes going to a college that is 7 hours away this fall. Should I cut ties with her? This fucking sucks man. Literally all my friends are moving away to far away colleges and now I finally meet someone I like and connect with and she's doing the same. Shit sucks, ive only got like a couple of friends left after everyone moving on with life and I hate all my coworkers.

>>17280057
That's tricky, because honestly I would feel a bit weird if a guy essentially broke up with his current girlfriend just to take a chance on me. It makes me feel like he could do the same to me in the future, which would be shitty. But I guess if he explained how the relationship had come to an end prior to meeting me, and that he didn't see it going in the direction he thought/hoped or he just realized over time they weren't right for each other or whatever, that would be logical and probably acceptable. Basically what I'm saying is don't ever say (out loud) that you broke up with someone for someone else: instead say that you and original girlfriend broke up for reasons unrelated to the existence of other girls.

>>17280065
But my heart yearns for loving.
Also muh dick... but seriously. I'm lonely and this guy said it. >>17280097
I take care of them I provide for them.
I just want to be a normal person :/

>>17280173 Cont.
I don't think I'd be able to have anything normal seeing as how I have no one when I can't leave my senpai. I'm afraid of the gold diggers when I do get the chance. If I was alone while I had nothing, why would I share the fruits of my hard work with someone when I get my $,$$$,$$$?

>>17279942
>are you 12? i don't think i've ever gotten an erection from a hug
Nope, 24. Yes I know its awkward, I'm just easily excited.

>>17279940
>>17279747
>>17279743
"I like you just the way you are."

>>17277143
Do introverted gamer guys ever text first?

>>17280199
Girl asking guys that by the way

>>17280199
Yes, but only if we're very familiar with the person, and even then pretty rarely.

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>>17280199
Sure, especially if she takes the initiative to contact me first now and then. But if a woman is ignoring my texts, or has made it a habit of only responding some hours if not days later my interest in chatting her up is going to be pretty low.

I have friends that respect my time, I don't need that kind of shit.

I need some general advice on understanding how people date, /adv/. I'm flat out inexperienced.

I don't really understand the concept of casual dating multiple people at the same time, because I don't want to be one of the people "competing" with another person. I think that a guy who has 2 girls in his life should instead try to make 1 relationship work instead of testing the waters with multiple girls. Making people compete with each other means you end up comparing people for shallow reasons, like "x is smarter but y is prettier, but x is low maintenance and y requires more effort", doesn't it? He could give both girls the same present as a test to see how either would both react. When you have more than 1 girl, all the things you do to be thoughtful to her are less meaningful, because you are still thinking about doing things for the other girl sometimes. Does any of this make sense, or am I being paranoid?

I genuinely want to know if my way of thinking is dumb or unrealistic. I have very limited dating experience, so all this shit is pretty much new to me and I'd really appreciate any things you guys could teach me.

>>17280239
The story is that when this guy and I met (we're both late 20s), he was seeing someone at the time, but that was fine because we got to know each other pretty well by just being friends. He was apparently dating her sporadically, saying something about work being so busy for him which didn't give him much time to date her more often, which seemed like an excuse on his end, and that coupled with some other things he said she had done for him (getting into his interests/hobbies to particpate with him) made it seem that she was more into him than he was into her. I'm not saying that's a good thing, since I don't want him to be leading someone if when he's not really into her. But my point is that it's to say they were "casually dating". Anyway, despite him saying work was too busy for him to date her more often, he always made time for me and other friends in our group, and a couple weeks ago started to really treat me differently, like asking me to lunch twice within a few days, started hanging out very frequently one on one, would bring me small things like little presents or vidya/movies to borrow without prompting. So that happened all in the last two weeks, and I couldn't tell at first if he was just becoming more comfortable as friends, but now I see that what has been going on between us seems pretty clearly romantic in intent. But I feel like I fucked up by not asking him if he was still seeing the original woman. My friend says it's likely he stopped seeing her and that's the reasoning behind his newfound enthusiasm for being with me so often, but I can't shake my doubts since I don't have an explicit answer.
(1/2)

>>17280239
>>17280240
(2/2)
Should I just straight up ask him the next time I see him if he's still seeing her? If he is, I don't want to give him an ultimatum about how I'm not going to keep seeing him if he's seeing her, because I don't want him to choose between us. I'd rather he give her a real chance, since she came first and I just feel like everyone deserves a good effort. I don't want her to just be thrown aside because he thinks he might be more into me. But, I also don't want to see him if he's still seeing her. I'm just not secure enough to deal with that, I guess. It doesn't help that he's a postdoc in mathematics and everyone he has dated (including her, he told me) holds a STEM graduate degree. I only have a bachelors and am not nearly as accomplished as he is professionally. I don't know if I want to go back to school, but that's besides the point.
What do you think I should do, /adv/? Do I ask him about her? Do I suck it up and keep seeing him without asking about her? Is is emotional cheating if he's hanging out with both of us at the same time? I don't know what I'm doing.

End textwall. Thanks for reading.

>>17280202
Yes, I do.

Are women generally far less horny as men, or are they generally far more picky than men?

>>17280242
>Should I just straight up ask him the next time I see him if he's still seeing her?

yes.

>Is is emotional cheating if he's hanging out with both of us at the same time?

not if you haven't established boundaries i.e had the exclusivity talk.

>>17280239
>I don't really understand the concept of casual dating multiple people at the same time, because I don't want to be one of the people "competing" with another person. I think that a guy who has 2 girls in his life should instead try to make 1 relationship work instead of testing the waters with multiple girls.
The point of dating is to get to know each other, it isn't a relationship. Even if you're dating one girl, you shouldn't really get into anything serious until have a good idea of what she's like.

That's the whole point of the exclusive talk, when you've gone over things and want to give it your full attention. You're asking if you should ask him if he's still seeing that other girl, but having the exclusive talk would include that imo.

>>17280257
>>17280256
Thank you both for replying. So in that case, should I have the exclusivity talk with him when I see him next? Which is actually tomorrow...
How can I tell if it's too early to have that talk? Or should I just have it regardless of whether it's too early, because I don't want to be interfering with his possibly-still-going-on relationship with her?

>>17280267
>So in that case, should I have the exclusivity talk with him when I see him next?
I probably would, in a similar situation. I don't do well with ambiguity when I know what I want.

I wouldn't really base your decisions on whatever is going on with that other girl. A month and a half, two months is generally when I know I want to be official with someone, but others mileage may very.

>>17277150
Fetlife

>>17280199
>Do introverted gamer guys ever text first?

Yeah.

>Yes, but only if we're very familiar with the person, and even then pretty rarely.
Speak for yourself.

>>17280239
>I need some general advice on understanding how people date, /adv/. I'm flat out inexperienced.
>Does any of this make sense, or am I being paranoid?

Honestly I don't do the multiple dating thing at all (i just can't. literally start confusing names and events), but you're over thinking this to an extreme degree.

People don't go in comparing each and every aspect of person X to person Y. They just go out on dates until they get to know them enough and figure out, hey, this person and I really get along, things feel right and I think I want to be in a relationship with them.

The exclusivity talk happens as early and or as late you need it to happen, but in general it's between 3 to 8 dates.

That being said, I remember I had that same convo with my gf the first date (I think she literally just said, Just so you know, "I'm not planning on seeing anyone else, but it's cool if you want to" and I just responded with "me either").

Do what feels right for you.

>>17280276
>I don't do well with ambiguity when I know what I want.
I'm definitely the same.
>I wouldn't really base your decisions on whatever is going on with that other girl.
I think this is the hardest part for me, and I'm not sure why. This might be completely unrelated, but I grew up with really strict parents in a very sheltered family, as an only child, and they always compared my personal accomplishments with that of family friends' kids or my other classmates. And it was bad enough being judged academically on that, so I guess I just don't want to get myself into a situation where I'm judging my personal worth in comparison with someone who honestly sounds like I could be friends with, based on the little he's told me about her. She actually sounds kind of awesome, so it makes me feel kind of shitty that he might be balancing both of us. I don't know. I'm sorry for unloading my mental bullshit, but thank you so much for the advice. I really do appreciate it.

>>17280285
>I think I want to be in a relationship with them.

I'm going to amend that, the exclusivity thing isn't necessarily I want to be in a relationship with them, it's more I want to pay more attention and see if there's potential for relationship.

GUYS
My bf has been busy at work lately, so he hasn't had time to come over. As you can imagine I have my needs and bought a dildo+vibrator. A month or so later he came over, and things got hot and heavy so we went to my bedroom and started getting ready. He went to my dresser to get a condom and saw the dildo next to it (what can I say, I'm organized), then told me he wasn't in the mood and left. After texting him for a while he replied that he felt insecure since my dildo was larger than him, which it is. I told him to nut up or shut up and that he shouldn't have a problem since he jacks off anyways, which is bothered me anyways but we had talked it over before. Am I over reacting too badly? I mean I know I was a bit harsh, but was I too mean to him? What should I do?

>>17280293
>I think this is the hardest part for me, and I'm not sure why
I'm guessing you think he's just stringing this girl along so it seems a bit fucky to you. But the fact is you're missing a whole lot of context, so its hard to say. For all we know they're just casually dating for funsies and she likes the attention for instance. If it is something that concerns you, bring it up during said exclusive talk.

You're also free to back off if you find his answer insufficient. I've immediately dropped women when they joked about stringing guys along for a free meal. You're never obligated to date someone you're uncomfortable with.

>>17280305
>I've immediately dropped women when they joked about stringing guys along for a free meal.
Look out everyone, the MRA have arrived

>>17280302
>Am I over reacting too badly?
You told him to shut up when he was feeling insecure. Of course he's going to be uncomfortable with you. If you had just talked to him as you know, a fucking partner all of this could have been avoided.

>>17280310
Your bait is weak m8

>>17280302
He's being a bit of a baby, but you shouldn't have yelled at him. Apologize for yelling at him and explain your point of view calmly and clearly.

>>17280312
>You told him to shut up when he was feeling insecure. Of course he's going to be uncomfortable with you. If you had just talked to him as you know, a fucking partner all of this could have been avoided.
I mean I tried to, but he can jack off all day but I'm not allowed to now.

>>17280317
From what you said he wasn't mad because you were masturbating, he was mad because you were using a toy bigger than him and that made him feel inadequate to fulfill your needs.

>>17280317
You're missing the forest for the trees. The issue isnt that you arent allowed to masturbate, but that you chose to masturbate with something bigger than him. He presumably interpreted this as you wishing he was bigger. I'm pretty sure you'd feel bummed out if he made a comment you interpreted as him implying your tits are saggy or whatever.

Instead of trying to empathize with why he was insecure, you tried to make him feel like a bad person. You can keep kicking your heels in the ground or mellow out and talk to him about this.

>>17280327
No I get that, but I'm buying a dildo that makes me feel good, I'm not going to buy a smaller one to wave in his face like "look you're so much bigger, have a cookie"

Girls: do you prefer if a guy texts you back immediately or waits?
I've heard people say you should wait so you don't seem so desperate but I don't know. Whichever you say can you explain why?

>>17280294
Oh wait, so the exclusivity talk isn't necessarily a straight up relationship commitment? That sounds better, less scary. In the last few minutes I've been googling "exclusivity talk" and trying to figure out the differences between exclusivity and the boyfriend/girlfriend label, but what you said sounds like the key difference: it's basically declaring you want to try it out with this person and this person only for the time being, not necessarily "yep we're an official thing now, oldschool style", which sounds more serious and farther along in a relationship.

>>17280305
>so it seems a bit fucky to you
Exactly. And you're right, I don't have the context of their relationship at all, which is probably another reason I'm speculating the worst possible scenario. It won't be too intrusive if I ask him about it? Because in a way, I feel like I'm missing out on learning about an important aspect of his character, similar to what you said about when girls joke about stringing guys along, I would be uncomfortable if he said something like she was just a placeholder or that he knew she'd stick around despite his disinterest.

>>17280331
>but that you chose to masturbate with something bigger than him
Wow I guess it's my fault I want to feel good
>He presumably interpreted this as you wishing he was bigger.
I'd like if he was, but I'm not going to torture him with something he can't change

>>17280302

You were indeed kind of harsh, but he's being an oversensitive, and probably hypocritical, baby.

Still he's the boyfriend that you choose, and it's not good form to call him on it when he's already hurt.

It's up to you if you want to deal with his hypocritically childish drama or not.

>>17280334
As soon as you can reply. Why would I text you if I wanted to wait ages for a reply?

>>17280339
>and it's not good form to call him on it when he's already hurt.
It's not my fault he's mad over some plastic

>>17280336
>Oh wait, so the exclusivity talk isn't necessarily a straight up relationship commitment?
It depends on the person, but it generally just means "lets agree to stop dating other people".

>It won't be too intrusive if I ask him about it?
You're talking about entering a relationship, I think having full context about what he's doing is pretty key. This isn't even a matter of his past, but something he is actively doing.

>>17280338
>Wow I guess it's my fault I want to feel good
Christ blow off with the pity me act. The issue wasnt that you wanted to masturbate, otherwise he'd have made a stink of the vibrator too ya dingus. He was insecure and you insulted him instead of explaining why those insecurities are moot and that sex you have is good. Insulting him was about the dumbest thing you could have done.

You can keep up this act or talk to him like an actual partner, it's your decision.

>>17280334
I prefer when someone texts me back the same day, or even better, within a few hours. The best to me is an immediate response.
I don't ever make any assumptions about desperation if someone responds back immediately. I always respond back to people immediately, given that I'm not driving or otherwise involved in something. Unless they asked you for some kind of information that you'd have to look up, ex. spend time on, everything is just more efficient when handled immediately.
Come to think of it, I wouldn't ever give a guy my number if I thought he seemed like the desperate sort, so that whole problem is usually avoided by most girls in the first place. She liked you enough to want to talk to you and give you her number, so I assume she's hoping you'll be into her too, which you can show by not being a slowpoke at responding. Also, if you make a habit out of waiting a day or days to respond, she's going to think you aren't interested. I knew a guy who always seemed really into me in person, but messaging that guy was the fucking worst. He would literally take like 3 days to say something as pointless as "haha, cool". I had no idea what was going on with that, so I cut off contact. Just seemed like a waste of time that I couldn't tell if he was actually into me or not, so I moved on.

it's fine to be best friends with the opposite sex and have many friends of the opposite sex, right? Femmanon here btw.

>>17280355
>I think having full context about what he's doing is pretty key. This isn't even a matter of his past, but something he is actively doing.
Thanks, that makes sense and I feel like I have a better understanding now of this whole situation. Talking this out with all of you on /adv/ has been incredibly helpful. I really appreciate you guys spending the time to help.

>>17280362
Yes, but it's a huge red flag if you have no friends of your same sex, regardless if you're a man or woman. Not being able to get along with a particular group of any kind shows there's something wrong. If you don't have any female friends, anon, I wouldn't trust you.

>>17280350
>It's not my fault he's mad over some plastic

Yeaah... you're sounding like a bit of an asshole here to be honest...

I'm on your side that he's being a whiny bitch about it, but that changes neither that it was bad form to call him out on it, nor that this is the boyfriend you've chosen.

If you don't want to deal with this shit, dump him.

Don't be a cunt just because you have the upper ground, that's how you end up building bad habits that will haunt and sabotage you in any future situations and relationships where you don't.

>>17280336
>Oh wait, so the exclusivity talk isn't necessarily a straight up relationship commitment?

Pretty much.

>>17280362
>it's fine to be best friends with the opposite sex and have many friends of the opposite sex, right? Femmanon here btw.

Male anon with a female best friend.

It's fine.... except... if the majority/all of your friends are male... that's kind of a potential red flag that you just can't play with other females nicely and are after something more than just friendship.

And yes, I know how bitchy girls can be, but seriously, if you just can't get along with any other women, there's probably a reason behind it.

I met a girl on Tinder and we had our first "date" yesterday
It was pretty cool, most of what I like about her was confirmed and I'm pretty sure she like me
But there is a little problem : she is chubbier than I expected
She is still cute but she could be much more after losing weight. The thing is that she can't for now, because of health reasons (her medication make her gain weight and she can't do sport)
She was thin before her problems but I don't know if she want to go back

I don't have a problem with her being that chubby but I can't see myself with her because of that (I'm really thon)
What should I do ?

>>17280361
That's a good point. I normally respond to her within the day unless it's late and she's likely to be asleep, in which case I'll text her in the morning. I really like her and always want to respond immediately but I felt like it might seem a little over eager. Thanks for the advice.

>>17280398
I'm really thin*

>>17280398
If it's a problem don't date her. If you can get over it date her. It's simple as that.

>>17280398
>I don't have a problem with her being that chubby but I can't see myself with her because of that (I'm really thon)

If you can't see being with her, you can't see being with her.

Does that make you shallow? Maybe, but don't guilt yourself in to doing something you don't want to do.

It is what it is.

>>17280398
Well the worst possible thing you could do is tell her to lose weight.
Say for instance you are working out, for starters let's say a jog. Invite her, at least when she's comfortable enough with you.

>>17280401
This might be bad advice, but as someone who puts their ringer on silent at night time, I don't think you should worry about texting her too late at night when she might be asleep. There have been times where I didn't expect a text back from someone because it was late, but receiving a response led to a "what on earth are you doing at this hour" conversation, which can be fun and lead to a longer exchange. That's actually how I developed the relationship I have with my best friend. We would both text each other random shit at night time and it was just a fun thing to do. Also, since you like her, it's not the worst thing to have you be the last person she talks to before she goes to sleep. And she'd probably feel the same.

>>17280377
>>17280391
I have both but people think I fuck every guy I'm friends with. I though that was just their problem, but I thought I'd ask here I'm in the wrong. Do you think it's wrong if they sleep over? I really have no sexual relations with any of them, and I wouldn't lie on the internet about that.

>>17280398
If it's a dealbreaker it's a dealbreaker. Unless she has stated she plans to lose weight, you should 100% assume she'll be like that as long as she's taking her medication, if not longer.

I'm saying this as a fat guy who's trying to lose weight. Some bigger women have called been assblasted because I didnt want to be with an another chubster unless they too were trying to improve their weight problem.

>>17280426
If I see a woman with male friends, I don't assume they're fucking. I would suspect they're fucking if she's doing shit like sitting on his lap. The fact everyone seems to think you are makes me thing you have rather poor boundaries about touching and personal space.

>>17280426
What this guy said: >>17280438
If you get handsy with all your guy friends, I as a fellow female are going to assume you're flirting with all of them as a way of trying to like tell other people they're "yours", or you just really want to be the center of attention, neither of which are particularly good.
>I thought that was just their problem
That right there makes me "ehhhh"
I don't think it's wrong to have your friends sleep over, nah. Not unless they are literally in the same bed as you.

>>17280438
>>17280451
Well it's not too many people who think that to be honest. Comments mainly come from my mom or dad who are both unhealthy with relationships in general, but they bug so much it really gets to me. I think sometimes I don't have personal space when it comes to my best friend, but I do that with my girl friends and it's fine. I guess I can see your point though.

File: Christ,_by_Heinrich_Hofmann.jpg (277 KB, 1096x1612) Image search: [Google]

277 KB, 1096x1612

>>17277143
Would you girls date a guy who looks like our lord and saviour? I took this picture of myself earlier.

>>17280481
Christfags will be all about that dick. Me personally? No, not into bearded men. You do have options though.

Women: How hairy do you like your men? Facial hair, body hair, pubes etc.

>>17280433
>you should 100% assume she'll be like that as long as she's taking her medication, if not longer.
She will take this medication forever

>>17280502
Well, I don't normal mind hair or lower "happy trails", but I don't like armpit hair or massive foot hair. I don't like any facial hair, but many women like stubble. I've only though a beard was cut once, and that's because I really, really liked that individual.

>>17280507
Then that answers that. I mean if you're not attracted to her, it is what it is. Just don't throw yourself into a relationship with her because you feel obligated though, that would just waste everyone's time and cause unneeded pain.

>>17280525
*mind normal hair
i.e. leg hair, back hair, arm hair ect. But if you don't have that, I really don't mind either.

Ummm. Rate my profile and leave suggestions? I'm just curious, and bored with life in general lol.

https://www.okcupid.com/profile/kini9

>>17280589
I'm a guy so take what I say with a grain of salt but I couldn't get farther than a paragraph into that bio

it's some quality cringe that's for sure, 8/10

>>17280334

Do whatever feels natural to you, and you'll attract someone who's in sync.

>>17280615
>and you'll attract someone who's in sync.
Unless you're a sperg in which case you'll attract no-one.

>>17280589
Here's my thought process
>hmm, no profile picture? Oh well, let's keep looking
>that first sentence - what the fuck? What sort of weirdo writes that in their bio?
>let's keep reading anyway
>oh, I get it, he's trying to be edgy
>hiding low self esteem behind humour = unattractive
>I can't read anymore
>if this guy messaged me, I'd ignore him, I have no patience for freaks like this

>>17280628

Then all is as it should be.