Well, I fucked up this time /adv/.
Hung out all day Tuesday with this girl who has a boyfriend. We got kind of drunk, and she really started going for it. Like undoing my belt going for it.
I told her no, because I knew her boyfriend, and it would be unfair to everyone involved, and I decision we would both completely regret the next day.
Also she was drunk and I'm not getting close to that whole rape thing.
She got pretty angry, and got a cab and went home. She told me later she got in a huge fight with bf, presumably because she was ignoring him for the majority of the day.
Well we haven't talked in 2 days. I figure I'll just wait until she feels we need to talk.
Did I fuck up or do the right thing? I could have manipulated that entire situation into sex and chose not to because of some weird white-knight complex I guess I have.
Is she mad because I turned her down? I even told her I was into her, but couldn't do anything because of her boyfriend.
tl;dr - turned down girl with boyfriend. She hasn't said a word to me in two days. Did I fuck up?
>>17238317
You did not fuck up at all. You did the right thing. Proud of you OP
>>17238317
you're a good person OP.
the slut is mad cause she offered her body to a dude and got turned down which probably doesn't happen often.
>>17238321
>>17238325
Thanks guys, I really needed the validation. Kind of makes me feel like a huge pussy for not taking the sex that I really did want in all honesty.
Just not on these terms.
>>17238317
In my opinion you may have dodged a bullet, who knows if she might have dragged you into her shit. She was drunk too so she could have claimed rape as you said because she might have had regretted it the next day. Keep going on with your life, if she wants to really fuck you she may reach you.
Also, you did know she had a boyfriend she ignored and you knew she was drunk, you are a bro in my list for not sticking your dick in her by not taking advantage of the situation.
>>17238317
Good job man, don't be a jody, you did good. Made me proud
>>17238347
It really could have gone in that direction.
I mean honestly, I'm surprised in myself for having the mental fortitude to resist the whole issue.
>>17238350
Thanks guys. And thanks /adv/, been kind of stressing about this since it happened.
I was kind of worried that I had not only burnt a ton of bridges, but nuked them from orbit.
>>17238317
COMPLETELY IGNORE ANYTHING ANYONE ELSE SAYS OR THINKS.
What do you think about it?
Would you have felt ok about it?
Would it have violated any morals or ethics you have that define you in your own eyes?
One of the most important things in life is strive to be true to the best version of you that you want to be/that you would be proud to be.
This case is a little more obvious for you, but not every call in life is black and white, there won't always be people there to tell you what's right and wrong, so ultimate, a lot of life comes down to you doing what you think is right for who you think you are/want to be.
Practice this now, so you'll be better prepared later.
>>17238385
Have you considered calling up her bf and telling him what happened? Or maybe writing out your thoughts and sending it through a fb message or something?
If my gf ever did something similar id sure as hell want to know about it.
>>17238317
You did the right thing OP. You respected her boyfriend, her even though she doesn't see it that way, and most importantly yourself.
Also, being a good person and being a white Knight are not one in the same. As far as I understand it white Knighting is standing up for a girls "honor" even though she has none and doing it under the pretenses of being a "nice guy" so you can possibly get laid. Being a good person is respecting your own morals, the people involved and the situation itself.
Personally I'd tell her boyfriend about what all went down. I highly doubt he'd want to be with her if he knew about her behaviour when he's not around.
>>17238317
Proud of you OP, aaaand she's o whore
>>17238409
>What do you think about it?
I think I wanted sex and could have gotten it, but it simply isn't in my character to ruin someone else's relationship - I can let the next guy she pulls this shit with do that.
>Would you have felt ok about it?
At first, I would have felt like a king. It wouldn't have been until the next day that I would realize the implications of what I had done.
>Would it have violated any morals or ethics you have that define you in your own eyes?
Simply put, yes.
I find that part of this issue is my fault. I should have recognized that it could have gone in this direction, and I had fooled myself into thinking that I could have a platonic relationship with a girl I was sexually attracted to.
Like literally, we went on a date, and I was too enamored by the idea of hanging out with an attractive girl to realize that it simply couldn't end well for anyone. Clearly my intentions were subversive to their relationship to begin with.
>>17238445
Honestly, I think it's too late for that.
No one has come knocking on my door asking for an explanation, so it's most likely that she's already done so - hence why she hasn't spoken to me since the issue.
She told me she got in a huge fight, and then we haven't talked since. She most likely said some stuff about me that wasn't true, but he hasn't asked me.
So until someone comes to me, I'm just going to say nothing and pretend it didn't happen (at least publicly). If/when he wants to talk to me about it, I'll be up front and tell him what really happened. I think this issue has already been detrimental enough to their relationship that clearly wasn't going very well to begin with that any input from me at this point would be redundant.
