>>17196865
how small is "too small"

It's over, haha

Is he too small or is there an echo between your thighs?

Either way, the solution is the same. You need to use fingers to help get yourself off.

>>17196882
It's about the length of my fist, it's not like I've taken a ruler to it.

>>17196894
What if I can't?

>>17196906
Then get used to faking it or sit and talk with him about foreplay.

My dick is around the same size (maybe 5.3 inches or so) and by itself I'll come way before my girlfriend does. It's not length that's the problem, it's that women on average don't climax as quickly as men. I usually get her off with my fingers or tongue first, then fuck her while she's still wet and sensitive from the first orgasm. Usually she comes a second time from my dick.

On the rare occasion we go straight to to my dick, I spend some time with my hand afterwords.

You have bigger problems anyhow OP. Your boyfriend is insecure as fuck and rather than look into solutions for it, he is focused on his own gratification and not concerned by yours.

Indicates he's either a)never cared if you achieve sexual satisfaction, b) not mature enough to rationally handle an exceedingly common problem or c) a petulant manchild.

>>17196990
He's a bigger guy, he doesn't have a problem with going on and on. The issue is that he gets annoyed at me telling him to go harder all the time, he's described it as being like trying to beat a horse to death with a banana.

So masturbating beforehand helps?

>>17196865
either just live with it and play happy to stop the 3 hour silent treatment or leave. That sounds like a little dick and nothing you or he can do about it.

>>17196906
>What if I can't?
Then the issue isn't necessarily with your husband, it's with you. If you're unable to satisfy yourself in that way, you need to spend more time exploring yourself. If it's a matter of needing more time, focus more on foreplay before penetration.

I've never in my life been able to get off on penetration alone. It just doesn't happen, even when playing with my g-spot--I just feel an irritating need to pee, but no pleasure. But I do have a sensitive clitoris that brings me waves of pleasure and I've been masturbating since I was very young. Try new things, OP.

>>17197025
Well if you keep telling him to go harder he kind of has a point
Think about how you would feel if he were deepthroating you until you gag and kept repeating "deeper"

>>17197025
Yes, immediately beforehand. Show him where your gspot is and have him get at that with his hands first. Or the Clit. Or both at the same time.

Some women just can't climax from vaginal penitration, you could be one of those too.

Either way, he's a shitty lover to ignore a perfectly good clitorus.

Break up with him and find someone with a bigger dick? Sometimes when I browse this board I wonder how dense people are. Like do you expect us to come up with a way to make his dick bigger?

>>17197034
I've met small rocks and russian cops more sensitive than my clitoris. My entire genitalia are the least sensitive parts in my body.

>>17197049
I don't have a gag reflex and he can't reach that far. I understand what you mean, though.

>>17197075
Then you need to talk to a gynecologist because you have some sort of sexual dysfunction that may be (and probably is) treatable.

How many Russian cops have you met?

Most women can't orgasm to dick anyway, so he should learn how to manually probe your G spot and you can do tantric breathwork meditation together to channel sexual kindalini chi from the sacral chakra to your third eye - way better than sex.

>>17197085
Four.

I was paired up with a complete moron on a school field trip to St. Petersburg. The police found his antics just as unfunny as I did.

What could cause this kind of thing? I have problems articulating my issues to medical professionals - I always seem to make understatements. It's nearly killed me a few times.

>>17196865
poor girl. if a guy blows on my clit I cum

>>17197075
>I've met small rocks and russian cops more sensitive than my clitoris.
That made me laugh pretty hard.

>My entire genitalia are the least sensitive parts in my body.
It sounds like you have a difficult time getting turned on (which does make you more sensitive to stimulation). I second the other anon in that you should seek help from a gyno.

Do you take medication for anything? Are you on birth control? Certain types of birth control can mess with your body and make arousal difficult.

>>17197110
Any number of causes. Diet, fitness level, stress, anxiety, could be you were just born like that. All of those can be treated.

You speak plain to your obgyn. I'm not enjoying sex, I've never enjoyed sex and I don't think it's my boyfriend. What do I do?

>>17197118
I'm not on any medications at all.

So can I just walk to a doctor and announce that I can't get off? Do they seriously consider that a real problem?

>>17197124
I eat pretty healthy, I have a fairly physical job and I've just taken up running, I have no reasonable sources of stress or anxiety in my life.

I've never been to a gyn. Can you just walk in with something like that? How do I prove that it is a genuine source of stress in my life?

>>17197141
They do consider that a problem worthy of medical treatment, and you may have sexual anxiety interfering with your ability to orgasm.

As far as walking in, I dunno, one of the many advantages of having a dick is I don't need a seperate lady parts doctor. Also the whole not undressing to pee thing. I just happen to know a lot about female anatomy and orgasms because it became clear to my from an early age my dick alone wasn't going to be enough, so I did my homework.

ProTip (literally): ladies, don't write off fat guys with great personalities too quick. Some of us know how your lady bits work and can make your toes curl.

>>17197169
My partner IS fat, and a wonderful person.

I've had normal doctors ignore or belittle actual problems I've had before, how do I convince one that it really is someting that needs treatment despite of not being lethal nor terminal?

>>17197184
If your doctor can't diagnose sexual dysfunction or isn't willing to listen to your input about your body, it's time to get a new doctor.

I know, the protip was for the other ladies.

>>17196865
He sounds like an asshole, dump him. Not your fault he doesnàt satisfy you. My bf hasn't made me come yet too but at least he doesn't act like an asshole about it, doesn't expect me to to fake it just to stroke his ego at my suffering and lets me have my orgasms with my vibrator. If he were like your bf I would dump him.. You have a shit bf, get rid of him and find someone better.

>>17197206
It's not them, it's me. Doctors always dismiss my problems, I don't know if I'm just too autistic to express them but for a good while a school nurse just flat-out refused to believe I'd actually hurt my foot and needed a real doctor, who believed her until it turned out there was a bone broken.

I don't know how to express myself in a way they will listen.

>>17197223
He's sweet, he just gets frustrated about sex. He didn't get a western upbringing and I guess he assumes that white guys just automatically know how to do it right.

>>17197243
You have real issues with self confidence, don't you?

Print this thread out and take it to a female OBGYN. Also a therapist.

>>17197243
>He's sweet, he just gets frustrated about sex
If he doesn't care about something fucking important like your satisfaction during sex and just thinks about his own gratification then soon he's going to start not caring about other things in the relationship too. Don't say you weren't warned.

>>17197255
I've had therapists and other mental health professionals evaluate my mental state and deem me to be perfectly fine.

>>17197266
Also, OP, not caring about your satisfaction during sex is enough for me to warrant a break-up. My sexual satisfaction is important to me and imo a guy that acts like your bf deserves to get ditched.

>>17197243
There is no right. Every girl is different. What makes you cum?

>>17197287
It's not that he doesn't care. He wouldn't be upset if he didn't. If he didn't care he'd just ejaculate and go to sleep. He doesn't get mad at me, he is mad at himself.

>>17197298
I don't know. It's never happened.

>>17197311
You have never came in your life?

>>17197321
No. Usually it doesn't matter, I've never liked sex with any of my previous boyfriends and usually they haven't cared, but it upsets him.

>>17196865
there's only one good solution: you both need to talk. it's not like you will bring surprising news to him about his dick. although it might be an unpleasant and difficult subject for him, he might also be relieved that someone is saying what is already known and finally start to take care of the situation. now when he sits silently in his room after sex he feels bad about his dick plus he's not sure about what you think. if he's the love of your life he can feel safe with you and there will be a solution. the most important thing is now that you both say how you feel and what you need. the rest follows

>>17197332
You should try some self-exploration. When you're home alone and you have extra time, just browse porn on your computer and play with yourself. You'll learn a lot of new things about what you enjoy. The goal isn't necessarily to orgasm (although that's certainly a good thing), but to help you understand your sexuality. Even if you go to a gyno, every woman should learn to enjoy this for themselves.

>>17197332
Ok, but then don't blame his size for it, because he may get the wrong idea and get even more self conscious. Most girls have a sensitive clit and can cum from fingers and oral easily.
Have you tried masturbating? How does that feel?

>>17197347
>>17197348
I have tried but I always get bored and give up.

>>17197368
What do you feel?

>>17197374
Bored, then frustrated about being bored, then sad about being frustrated. I have to preserve an hour for crying whenever I try.

>>17197396
Physically what do you feel?

>>17197409
[s]recoil[/s]

The vibration of a bullet vibrator against my genitals? I don't know what you want me to say.

>>17197433
As illustrated above, I can't fucking do anything right.

>>17197433
No tingling, pleasure, joy?

>>17197448
Just boredom. And a vibration. Pressure, if I push it.

My genitals have less sensitivity than the bottom of my feet.

>>17197466
Then tell this to your boyfriend. That you deeply love him, but your body is simply not built for this.

>>17197243
>didn't get a western upbringing
>white guys
azn?

>>17196865
Don't know.
I'm 8 inches, I've never had this problem.

>>17197487
How do I tell him that without just getting him more upset? If he hears that pleasing me was never an option, he'll just refuse to have sex forever indefinitely, and then we'll just both be upset.

>>17197488
Persian.

>>17197433
>>17197466
Stop with the bullet vibrator and try using your hands. You'll want to rub your thighs, your lips, etc. for a while to get blood rushing to the area. If I ever play with myself and just go straight to something as harsh as a vibrator, I'll get wet, but I'll lose sensation quickly. Use your hands, see what happens, and don't go into it expecting a lot to happen.

>>17197513
I don't thinks so. He thinks of ur add a performance thing that he didn't manage to succeed in, so he feels himself a faliure. If you tell him that the challenge was impossible to begin with, he will feel himself Lee of a failure and that will ease his frustration.

>>17197528
Thighs? Lips?

I think you lost me, I have no idea what you want me to do. How is touching my lips supposed to help?

>>17197513

Tell him, cunt.
In this case (like in 95% of stupid /adv/ cunts and faggots) COMMUNICATION is the key to success...

You know, the thing you should do in a real relationship.


[As well go see a good doctor. It is not normal that your genitals are that insensitive. Where do you live? I really hope for you not Iran anymore.]

>>17197541
Pussy lips, idiot. You stimulate the are around your genitals to get the blood flowing to the general area.

>>17197541
>How is touching my lips supposed to help?
Your vaginal lips, you moron.

>>17197595
Sweden. I'm not from Iran, and my boyfriend was born here.

>>17197541
Vaginal lips. Your labia. You'll want to rub around them, tug on them a little, etc.

>>17197600
>>17197603
>>17197609
Oh.

And that is supposed to feel good?

>>17197606

Oh, you jumped on the immigrant rape train, just without the rape ... yet.

How does it feel to be responsible for your countries downfall?

>>17197606
Jesus Christ, and in Sweden there aren't competent gynos?

>>17197606
Eh, let me see what I still remember from lusting after a swedish grill back in (german) school:

- Du har valdit fin har.
- Du har valdigt fina ögon.
- Du har valdigt vackar.
- Jag alskar dig.
- A döda e barn?

Was that somewhat right?

>>17197628
His family has lived here for 25 years and he pretty much gave up practicing his religion for me.

Not that I forced him, I just showed him that the world outside of Islam is perfectly ok and livable.

Grow up.

>>17197648
Your a decent girl, you do important work. You know what, I'll help you cum.
When was the time you felt most sensitive there?

>>17197641
"Har" is "have", not "are", so it's "du är valdigt vacker", not "har", and the letter ä is different from a, so "love" is "älskar". I have no idea what you were trying to ask about a dead child.

>>17197627
Yes?!

>>17197654
I'm not sure if you're approaching helping someone get over their prejudices from the right angle, but something something gift horse's mouth.

Define "more sensitive".

>>17197661
>"Har" is "have", not "are", so it's "du är valdigt vacker", not "har", and the letter ä is different from a, so "love" is "älskar".
Thanks.

>I have no idea what you were trying to ask about a dead child.
Just the title of a short story of stig dagerman we read in literature class in the german translation, shich is how I found out back then she was swedish.

>>17197627
If you're relaxed and comfortable, yes. It'll draw blood to your vaginal area, increase arousal, and that will increase your chance of having an orgasm when you rub your clitoris. Seriously, do that and use your hands. Stay away from vibrators until you learn to orgasm.

>>17197669
In that case I have literally never been relaxed and comfortable.

How do I get relaxed and comfortable?

I purposely GOT a vibrator because I couldn't do it by hand. I hate spending money on things, I wouldn't have gotten it if I hadn't already exhausted all other ideas.

>>17197683
What normally makes you relaxed and comfortable? When I didn't have to be anywhere, before I'd go to sleep, I'd take a hot shower or long, warm bath. Get clean. After I was dry, I'd slip into something warm and comfy, browse through porn and rub myself. It didn't immediately help me, but I did it a few times to relax. If you can do this and take your mind off wanting to orgasm, it helps. Your goal should never be to orgasm, because it will only make you anxious (and then your orgasm will NEVER happen).

>>17197704
I can't think of anything. Being drunk, maybe? I can't remember the last time I would have been relaxed and comfortable. I can work out until I'm too exhausted to move, but I wouldn't call that "relaxed" either. I'm still tense, just too tired to do anything.

>>17197712
what do you find sexy about your man? What gives you ladyboners?

if you think he will be a good father to your kids? think about that or how you two would make kids
if you think some part of his body is sexy, lay your focus on that and try to remember how it looks when he is moving or touching you or whatever.

alcohol, cannabis and XTC should be helpfull for erotics and relaxing, but dont overdo it. and tehy are not really necessary.

also learn more about dirty talk and see if that works for you.

if you want him to fuck you harder go get a big dildo and let it stretch you out.

Also if he is fat, if he loses weight, his penis will become longer aswell.

>>17197667
Yeah, you're right about that. 4chan just gets the worst out of me.
More sensitive: feeling more intense feelings than rubbing your skin elswhere.

Also, id your boyfriend has a muslim background prepare for him to be a huge manchild. Muslims are brought up valuing their pride a lot and the usually see a battle in everything that they want to win. Like making you cum, and if they lose their "battle" they blame you, then go sulking for three hours like a child. Typical insecure adolescent behavior. You need to help to man him up. Getting him away from a toxic bunch who teaches him this is a good first step, but you need to teach him to not see the battle in everything.

>>17197733
I like him fat. I've always liked larger guys and it's very becoming on him. That, and his scent, voice, the way he moves, the whole thing. He's very gentle and understanding and determined to treat me right.

I can't have children and we've both accepted that.

How would stretching me out help? That would just ruin it for both of us.

>>17197736
I know the kind of things you're talking about, and we talk about it a lot. The weird or messed-up things he blurts out once in a blue moon are so out of character for him otherwise, he doesn't realise it was anything strange before seeing my reaction, but he does immediately afterwards.

It's like FLEAS on children of narcissists. You don't think something isn't okay if it's something you grew up with, it's just normal to you.

Not that he'd go around raping and beheading people, he just gets a backwards and counterproductive attitude about things a lot. Much less these days, but it does still happen.

Sex is one. Not about honour or purity, just the idea about failing in something he ought to know and do as a man.

>>17197760
Pride and narcissism. That's his problem (and of Muslims in general). They are stuck at the adolescent boy gang development level.

So, your pussy is always insensitive, no matter what you do to it regardless of your emotional state and everywhere? Your clit your lips, even inside?

>>17197777
He is not like that. Not he, personally. The entire male half of his family, pretty much, but not him. He listens to reason, and he's learned the concept of accepting things he doesn't understand. He has no idea why my mother trusts her dog's judgement on people, and the idea of people just honestly not having a religion at all is vaguely beyond him, but he accepts that. It's progress, and he keeps making progress because he loves me and knows I won't budge.

I'm not sure what "insensitive" means in this context. It does feel touch, heat, cold and pain.

>>17197792
Not more sensitive than any other skin surface.

>>17197798
Then literally always, I guess.

>>17197800
Everywhere?

>>17197792
>he's not like that
If he weren't he wouldn't be a drama queen about sex. He could be much better than his relatives though.

>>17197802
Yes?

>>17197805
Unlearning harmful behavioral patterns doesn't happen at the snap of one's fingers.

>>17197817
Oh I know that, that's why I recognize your work and think you're valuable.

>>17197760
THAT'S the reason I didn't get a boyfriend among my people. And that I'm physically repulsed by their looks. Don't know why but only the blonde haired blue eyed did it for me, as long as I can remember.

Good luck handling one of "our" man OP.

>>17197829
It's not always just inherently harmful or dangerous things, most of the ideas and thoughts he has are just stuff he's never really thought about.

Every once in a while we have the same conversation over different things, going something like:
>why do/don't you do [something that makes no sense to me]
>why would I do that?
>because that's how it's done
>they don't do that in sweden
>we always did that at home
>that's a muslim thing. White people don't do that.
>oh.

>>17197853
Are you from Iran too?

>>17197817
Try to relax, and be completely convenient. Don't think of orgasming as a performance thing. Just be yourself once and take an hour just for yourself without any worries or annoyances.

I'd come to Sweden next time I visit Europe and give you my fat American 7.7 inch dick

>>17197902
>relax
>be yourself
Which one?

>>17197933
What frustrates you?

>>17197945
Nothing. This whole idea of letting go of your anxieties and just being relaxed just feels as foreign to me as being able to let go of the concept of gravity and start floating around completely weightless.

It's just such a foreign concept to me.

Or maybe I misunderstand words and none of them mean what I think they mean, and I'm doing something else terribly wrong.

It's 3 am and I haven't slept and I just feel exactly the same as I always do, at all times.

>>17197959
>letting go of your anxieties
So there is something that frustrates you.
Maybe it's a better way to describe it to live in the moment. Do you play an instrument? If you do, you probably know the feeling when you can play something really well and you start to put, your feelings into the play. You no longer concentrare on the notes, it's just a routine, you live in the moment.

>>17197980
I haven't played an instrument since childhood (and always hated every second of it), and no, I can't picture the thing you're talking about.

I've tried meditating but that never sticks. It also freaks my partner out and I can't focus on anything except him being freaked out by it.

>>17197989
You sound like someone who just can't relax and live way too much in her head.

It's not just instruments, it works with everything you gain a mastery of. Try to be so good at something that you don't have to concentrate on doing it right, instead you can just play with it.
Same thing with your body. It's like an instrument. Don't concentrate on doing it right, just play with it.

>>17198005
I draw, is that enough?

What's the point if I can't do it right?

All of this is just massively frustrating.

>>17198010
That's the thing, from what you told us you do it right. You just focus too much on doing right.
If you draw, can you let it go and put your feelings into your drawing?

>>17198020
No.

You can't put feelings into drawing any more than you can put water into a rock.

Honestly OP, just fake it. If you don't care about getting off then just fake it. My boyfriend of 3 years has never once made me orgasm but as far as he knows he is a sex god because I always fake it for him. It's important to him that I "cum", in fact, he can't even finish until he thinks that I have. Male egos are fragile, you have to pander to them sometimes, but if you love your man as much as you say, it's totally worth it.

>>17196865
My fiance is 7" and can't get me off. It doesn't bother us because sex doesn't define our relationship holy shit you are with a giant man baby.

Push the showerhead against your clit, or put it under a faucet. That's how I started.

>>17198028
haha I hope this is not real I'm glad I can make my ex cum in 5 minutes from no porn or anything just my mouth and you are with someone so pathetic they can't even do such a primitive objective?

This is actually a pretty common problem among women, OP, and it always has been. There's a reason the female orgasm was genuinely thought to be a myth back in the day. Part of it is probably men having no idea/not caring about pleasuring women, but it's in part because a lot of women have a hard time cumming, too.

>>17198048
I wash my cunt every day and it doesn't do anything.

>>17198060
You have a broken cunt then. Visit a gyno.

>>17198070
Why would they care? I won't die from it and we already know I can't have children.

>>17198028
You love him so much that instead of working through the issue together you lie to him and stroke his ego? Gee he sure got himself a keeper. I hope the rest of your relationship isn't based on lies too.

>>17198075
You won't die from a lot of diseases. Many are more an inconvenience yet there are treatments. You have an abnormal vagina so find a doctor that actually knows his stuff and let them have a look.

>>17198100
They'll tell me to get a shrink. A shrink will tell me to go to a gyno.

>>17198089
I don't care about sex or orgasming and have basically no libido at all, but he wants to have sex and wants to think he's pleasing me. It's not an "issue", I'm very happy with how things are and so is he. I never want to have sex, I do it because it makes him happy, and he enjoys it more if I act like I'm into it. Is there really any harm? He does things he isn't interested in to make me happy all the time. It's called compromise.

>>17198100
lol exactly what do you think they can do for her

there is no magical vagina-fixing pill. OP just lost the genetic lottery and got stuck with a defunct vajayjay. Sucks, but it happens.

>>17198118
To be perfectly honest that's what I was thinking, too.

>>17198105
Then find a good gyno and insist they try to diagnose any physical causes, it could be some kind hormonal imbalance, you literally have no libido, that's physical.

>>17198144
I have a libido, I am usually the one who initiates sex. I just can't enjoy it or get off.

>>17198108
How can you say he is happy if you lie into his face every single time you have sex? I doubt if he knew he'd be very amused. I don't understand how faking it ever is okay. Not sure how he didn't catch you by now as well. Do you even get wet if you have no libido?

>>17198186
You're taking this super personally.

>>17198319
No shit. Faking orgasms is close to cheating when it comes to me. Either be honest or break up due to sexual incompatibility. And yes I'm biased due to personal experience.

>>17198672
Then what would you have me do?

>>17198753
I dunno, maybe be honest with your potential life partner about your problems? Sure, if he gets angry he's an idiot, but building a relationship off of lies is a serious issue whether you consider them to be significant or not. He obviously has a different opinion.

Besides, it's best for you to make your boyfriend a more mature person in ALL aspects if you want this to last. If you're afraid of losing him in the case he refuses to man up, stop lying to yourself that being stuck with someone is better than being alone.

>>17198792
He's not angry at me, he's angry at himself.

And he is not a potential life partner, he IS my life partner. The only way to get rid of him would be to murder him.

>>17196865

Dump the dicklet, or consider the most intellectual fetish to get satisfied

>>17198945
Read the thread

>>17199182
Yay

>>17196865
Learn your own turn ons inside and out. When aroused, situations that may make you feel grossed out or afraid can actually turn you on hardcore.

Tell him to Dom you and choke the shit out of you and other stuff. Lack of oxygen actually releases incredible waves of pleasure, and I strongly believe everyone deep down has some kind of domination fetish. If you cant dictate to him what makes you cum then just keep exploring.

>>17199226
Nothing gets me bone dry and crying faster than someone trying to dominate me. One of the very reasons why I love him is because he is not like that at all. He lets me lead.