Hey guys, not really sure where to turn to for help, so I figured since I've been a "4channer" for a fair few years I'd try this advice forum.
tldr: I'm sad because I have no RL friends.
So, pretty much I live in a small township with about 4000 population, and used to drink every weekend or so with friends and have a great time enjoying their company and generally just being around them. We'd look out for eachother, make eachother feel better when we were down etc, pretty much everything good friends would do for eachother. But now that I've gotten into a relationship with someone that doesn't like drinking or alcohol as much as I do, I've cut down on the drinking pretty much 99% except for special occasions and such. Now I don't really see any of them, I don't hear from any of them, and they've pretty much progressively stopped inviting me to anything. I try to keep in touch with them but pretty much everyone just doesn't reply to texts or calls anymore.
Like, I've tried my hardest to keep friendships going without using alcohol as a means to visit eachother, but it just seems like no one wants to know me anymore.
When I say no one wants to know me, I mean pretty much aside from family, my girlfriend, and two friends that I can hardly see or talk with due to conflicting work schedules, I have no one that wants anything to do with me. I've been getting more and more down about this, and not really sure what to do about it. I used to be somewhat of a social butterfly but now that I'm in this relationship (we've been together for two years almost) its starting to really hit home that I have no one to just "hang out" with or joke around with on weekends.
I can't exactly move to another town or city because I've recently bought a house here and I have family and a well paying job here aswell.
Don't get me wrong, I love my family and my girlfriend is great 90%of the time, I just wish there was something I could do to get that social interaction back in my life.
Should also put as a sidenote here, that I'm not in any danger of commiting suicide or anything like that - I've tried that sort of shit in the past when I was younger and I know that its not worth it. Nobodys mother should be put through anything like that.
Start a neighborhood beautification committee or something
I don't think that would work very well - the last person that tried that here about 5 months ago failed pretty miserably.
shameless self bump
Let me see if i've got this straight
>has cut down massively in alcobooze consumption
>is in a stable relationship
>is surrounded by family
>has a house
>has a good job
So what's the issue in a nutshell? Lack of friends?
Yeah. Severe lack of friends. I guess it probably sounds a bit stupid, but yeah. I miss it.
>>17194704
Sounds like where I grew up.
Try to re dig other old couples from highschool or local highschools.
You are pretty much fucked, IMO. The booze brought you together.
Once I left my small town, there is one guy who i stilll keep in touch with who lives there and one girl. The rest I'd love to see again but, I'm in no rush to head back.
Oh heres another kicker.. I wasn't exactly a popular kid at school either haha. I have tried talking to old "schoolmates" when i see them up the street but I still get the whole smug attitude like they know they're above me (if that makes sense?)
I do kinda feel a bit fucked. >_<
>>17195844
Yeah I know what you mean.
You either need to go back to the boys, or find a new girl. but I know how hard it is to find any sort of quality girl in a small town. Fuck, I'm only 23 but I haven't seen so many people since graduation, (I'm not home that often myself) but it seems like people are home for a few days over xmas and then fuck off back to the city.
I'd look for an exit strategy. You can always sell your house..
When i brought my ex down to meet my friends both sides hated each other because she didn't drink. I broke up with my ex a year later for that and other reasons.
I'll be honest, I don't really feel like my "friends" deserve to be my friends if it means I have to choose them over someone who has done literally nothing wrong in my life. Exit strategy sounds like a solid idea, i just know that I'd miss my family too much and my job.. its pretty much the cruisiest job I'll be able to find, especially with the pay that it gives.
I'm sorry if I'm being difficult guys - I just don't really feel like I should have to change anything to be happy
>>17195902
Find out what makes you happy,. and go for it
I see my family like once a year, but I'm happy
Yeah, easier said than done. Am I asking for too much? I don't think I am but ofcourse it's pretty biased.
