My girlfriend just texted me and said she had plans to hang out with someone she works with - as far as I know, that means getting coffee or something along those lines. If I remember correctly, the person she's hanging out with is a guy from her work that has asked her to hang out a few times before. He knows she has a boyfriend, and I told her once before that I'm not totally comfortable with it. She asked if I was okay with it, but I'm not really sure what to say. These kinds of things worry me, because in the past they've never turned out well.
>>17190671
Tell her you're not comfortable with it, which is the truth. She can either respect that or ignore it. Her decision will show you how important she considers your relationship.
>>17190671
>She asked if I was okay with it
That's her way of avoiding guilt should something happen. B-but you said it was okay. It's not my fault. I wove you. And if you say no then you look insecure. It's a lose lose.
>>17190688
>It's a lose lose
Yeah this is mainly what I'm thinking. And it's a triple lose because I already told her a while back that I didn't feel comfortable with her hanging out with this dude.
>>17190671
Why aren't you comfortable with her hanging out with this guy?
>>17190705
Why not?
>>17190688
>it's a lose lose
So fucking true. If you say no, you're an insecure jerk. If you agree, you're cucked to the next century.
Guys don't hang out with girls one-on-one just to hang out and be friends. Doesn't fucking happen.
The only way this would have been won is if she respected your feelings enough to just say no to the dude.
Think about it, if she was dating top-tier chad she would do everything in her power to maintain the relationship and not piss you off.
>>17190897
>>17190912
This.
Before I offer some advice, I want to know the reason.
>>17190965
First reply to this post.
Because, males and females just don't hang out one on one. It is foolish to believe there is nothing fishy with that.
Talk about insecurities all of you want, but this doesn't change the fact that this girl is doing things her boyfriend already stated he is no comfortable with.
>>17190924
>>17191007
Female in a seven-year, fully loyal relationship who hangs out one-on-one with male friend(s) here.
It does and can happen, though to my understanding, it's not all that common.
But OP, if you're not comfortable with that, you definitely need to be honest with her. Nothing good can come of you telling her "Yeah, that's fine," and then getting upset about it later, because at that point, you're either going to have to fester on it and get angrier because you can't say anything, or tell her it upset you and get the "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" speech.
Explain to her what makes you uncomfortable about it, and maybe you guys can come to a solution that benefits both of you.
And when you say "in the past they've never turned out well," do you mean with other girlfriends, with her, or with like....your friends' girlfriends or something? Because if SHE'S done this before, you definitely have every right to sound the alarms, but if it's happened with other girlfriends of yours/your friends, you have to consider that she's NOT them, though your apprehension is understandable.
I have to admit though, beings that you've already told her once that this bothers you, it seems kind of rude of her to keep pressing it.
Prep them side hoes up OP, they about to come in handy.
If you hang out with your side bitches, see if your girlfriend cares. If she does then you still got a chance.
If your girlfriend doesn't then good for you! You got a side hoe to make into your girlfriend now!
>>17190671
Tell her that it does indeed make you uncomfortable. It's not beta to do that, because you're simply trying to protect your relationship. What is truly beta is letting yourself get cheated on, especially if you suspect it beforehand.
Tell her you feel uncomfortable about her seeing other people alone. This is a given for most people when they're in relationships. If a person is taken they shouldn't go running around, paired off with people of the opposing sex, because it's extremely likely that the guy or at least one person in the situation is aiming for something other than just hanging out. And even if it's not deliberate, it still puts your girlfriend at risk of cheating on you because it serves her that temptation on a silver platter.
If you want to turn this into a comedic situation, invite yourself over with her to hang out with the guy. Bonus: The more awkward it is, the higher the likelihood that the guy is attempting something, or they've already attempted/done it. This seems too out-of-a-sitcom, though, and wouldn't necessarily recommend it as a first-resort. Still would be funny, though.
>>17190671
youre cucked anon - if you say noyoure controlling and she will go anyways if you say yes she will end up kissing him at some point. get a girlfriend that doesnt get tired of you.
>>17191109
Do this and post results.
