What is /adv/ opinion and male-female friendships. Can they work out or do the two always end up falling for each other and risking the friendship?
They can work if they keep contact to a minimum. Friendzoning girls work better over the long term than friendzoning guys.
>>17182084
It's fine. Depends on the people. I have platonic relationships with a lot of people of the opposite sex, it's not weird unless you make it weird.
cannot work out unless you are repulsed sexually by grill or sex friends.
At least that's been my experience...except the sex friends part ;_;
It's possible but only with a girl/guy you're not attracted to. If there's no physical attraction whatsoever it will work out just fine, if he/she is interesting person otherwise.
>>17182084
depends. if they are both ugly they might not feel anything.
i think its funny that you assume both will fall for each other. generally speaking only one falls for the other.
can only work if there is no proximity. Eventually one will fall for the other (usually the guy for the girl according to science) and then it becomes love or ends.
I have a few platonic female friends who are single. But they always live far away and we don't meet often. More than once, I've had one of them slip in a drunken state that if I asked to fuck, they wouldn't say no.
don't know if you guys have ever felt the same, but if I'm in a relationship, I stop really wanting or caring about female friends. For me, even in friendships that weren't sexual, a lot of the connection I've had with female friends is the unspoken "what if" that underpins the friendship.
tl;dr
they don't work out unless you fuck. and even then it'll end in tears if one of you get a bf/gf
>>17182084
Yes, but depends on the people.
I have male friends. I even think that some of them are attractive, but they'd be bad partners, we don't want the same things in a relationship/in our future, we don't have great chemistry, etc.
I'm mature enough to know what I want in a partner, and it's not them. I am against casual sex.
So there's no risk of me fucking it up.
>>17182171
How old are you?
>>17182187
I am 23.
>>17182171
OP here, the only reason I'm asking is because I think I'm gaining feelings for my friend and I don't want to just get in her pants and I don't want to ruin what we have.
>>17182235
Too late. You want to get in her pants.
>>17182238
beat me to it.
>>17182235
OP, why are you asking this question. fussing and worrying about ruining something will be worse than losing that person in the end. Man the fuck up and ask her out.
turn stuff up in IM or text;
ask what she wears to bed
tell her when you're going to take an hour so you force the image of yourself naked into her head
ask personal questions and start talking about sex positions and stuff
It'll stop her seeing you as her cool friend and turn her subconscious into thinking of you as a potential mate.
>>17182084
They can work as long as you limit your expectations and are open and honest.
>>17182246
Wouldn't suddenly acting like that be odd? I haven't acted like that to her before except the few times we spoke about sex. I have a feeling that could also ruin it if I do a complete 180 in how I behave towards her
>>17182235
Think about it a lot and try to understand if you two would be a good couple.
Your partner is not just a good friend you have sex with. You two need to have chemistry and strong attraction, that is mostly instinctual. If you want the relationship to work, you should also have similar values, you should want the same things in life and in a relationship. Take some time to think about how compatible your personalities are, if there's something about her you don't like and it would lead to fights and whatever.
If it's just an infatuation because they're attractive/you feel lonely, distance yourself and get over it.
If you think that you really want a relationship with them, ask them out and ruin what you two have. You can't be friends of someone you want to be in a relationship with anyway.
>>17182256
>wouldn't acting like that be odd?
you won't get something you want be worrying about it being odd... a devil may care approach is the best way. google some things to say in texts if you can't think of any. dude, you like her now so you're can either be a contributing member of society and make moves towards obtaining something that you want and get peace of mind that you tried, or be a faggot and get friendzoned always wondering about what could have been.
As for ruining it, I think the answer you want to hear is "nooo don't do eet OP". If what you have is so great escalate by texting, then phone calls, then ask her out on the phone.
I want to Believe they work but every friend I know mainly guys have had a crush on some of our female friends. Then every couple I knew eventually broke up becuase one of them made a friend and started dating that friend they said not to worry about after wards. This happened to me as well my ex bf of 4 years 3 days later after our brake up is suddenly dating this female friend he recently met like 2 weeks ago. I have several guy friends who I am not attracted to at all and would love if they stayed in my life for a long time so hopefully all that I've noticed is just bad luck and next bf is not the same.
>>17182261
Honestly, I didn't find her very attractive when we first met. I actually didn't even have any interest in being her friend but the more we hung out and the more I found out about her the more she become more attractive. I don't know how to explain her physical looks, she isn't outstandingly hot but she also is.
>>17182263
I'm actually hoping people can convince me to open up to her about my feelings because I know if I don't then time will eventually run out
>>17182084
Yeah if two people can truly behave like friends I don't see why not.
I have a pretty good female friend who provides emotional support, morale boost and is fun to hang around with. She is attractive, but I don't think we would be the best as a couple. At one point it sort of seemed like she was interested in dating me but she has a boyfriend now.
But I digress. We get along extremely well and as rare as it is that's more than enough despite us being of the opposite gender.
I tried being friends with another young lady after she turned me down. She kept acting like a ride bitch to me out of nowhere. Nevermind that she didn't want to date me, she wasn't even acting like a good friend so why would I keep up with that? A lot of times women say they want to be friends but then you realize the two of you weren't truly friends, like the kind that hang out and talk because they enjoy the company and value of one another.
>>17182084
Dude with multiple female close friends. I can confirm that I would have sex with them if they seriously offered. One of them did once but I foolishly turned them down. Anyway, it's possible but you have to find the right women. Just like all relationships, each one is unique to the people involved. So while my relationships with the close women in my life might not be conventional they are real and I wouldn't trade them for anything. Even if I was to be labeled a cuck or beta it wouldn't matter to me. I will never be the right man for them but I greatly enjoy being a friend to them.
It can absolutely work, but it needs to be an actual friendship. I feel like in this day and age real male/female friendships are to out of fashion that people only start to really try to befriend someone of the opposite sex as a consolation prize when a relationship does not work out or a crush is one-sided. And that is bound to fail because you're attempting to be friends with someone you don't actually want to (just) be friends with.
Also, a good friendship between a man and a woman looks like a friendship. (As in: no gratuitous physical contact, no constant cutesy stuff, a certain level of distance and respect for the other person having their own life, sense of boundaries etc.) For whatever reason it is very often portrayed as a sort of faux relationship. Faux relationships do not work.
Personally I have some male friends. Of at least one I am quite sure that he has no active desire to fuck me, of at least one I am sure that he'd jump at the chance if I offered. I don't care, for me it is not lack of sexual desire but desire to be friends that makes a friendship. Most young guys would fuck just about any girl. Doesn't mean they'd spend one on one time for years with just any girl.
Also, in a world with no consequences I would fuck the majority of my friends, male and female, and that does not mean I do not consider them friends or am just hanging around them in the hopes of fucking. I would actually not even risk that for the sake of not damaging the friendship. I never quite understood why some people reason like sexual attraction negates an interest in someone's life and care for their well being.
One of my closest friends is a girl, she's definitely not repulsive, but I have a gf and that's all that matters. She's not repulsed by me, we are just friends that simple.
I guess it's possible but for me I don't usually give fat girls the time of day because they usually have a bunch of weird complexes and attractive girls I'd rather treat as a sexual interest first before a friend. In my experience women just aren't going to be better company than men, they come with a host of other difficulties I'd rather not deal with.
I feel like all my friends who have female friends do so only to have the option of fucking their friends or they're hanging on to some shred of hope that they will get to fuck her some day when she breaks up with her bf.
>>17182084
It depends on how loosely you define the word friend.
I have heavy feelings for my best friend who does not feel the same and IT'S NOT WORKING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
