HARDCORE oneitis
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
Girl is 20, I'm 22.
So I met this girl. She asked me to have sex with her. We had FWB for about a week, then things got serious. We spent a ton of time together, started dating, and then she admitted she was in love with me.
It turns into the most genuine and caring relationship I've ever had. We never argued or even came into conflict, everything was fair.
Then we got separated. She's living in another country. We had plans to move together and get married after college. We were apart for about four months.
Then I found out in the worst way possible she was sleeping around. I sent her the proof, and she started lying and twisting things. While I didn't get angry, I made it very clear how upset I was. Her apologizes felt hollow, and it sounded like she was more upset about getting caught than anything.
I broke up with her because I felt like she didn't care. She went to bed in the middle of a conversation where I was telling her how we could fix things. I was so upset that I broke up with her. She felt like a completely different person.
I asked if we could get back together two weeks afterwards. She told me things couldn't work with the distance. Later she promised she would see me again "one day".
It's been a few months. I messaged her to check in with her. Things were calm, but then I poured by heart out on her. I told her all I wanted was for her to care and love me. I got a little unpleasant by telling her that her actions "made me suffer so much" and that "she probably won't meet someone who cares like I do".
She finally told me to "please stop" with my emotional outburst.
tl/dr: I dated a girl who showered me with love, and I wanted to marry. She slept guys when we were apart, and gave up on the relationship. I didn't do anything wrong, but she just ruined it. Every time I think I've recovered from it, it comes back worse and I just end up blasting her with my feelings. Her responses are no more than a few words.
>>17181880
stop being so pathetic and drop the gutter slut, you have emotions for a whore. you'd be better off taking your money and seeing a prostitute and giving her money to have her tell you she loves you and then fucking.
>She asked me to have sex with her. We had FWB for about a week
You should've kept it FWB. It should've been blindingly obvious that she was not marriage material. WTF were you thinking?
>>17181880
>"she probably won't meet someone who cares like I do"
She doesn't want love, she wants cock, and she's drowning in it.
>>17181905
Thank you I was just about to type this, no girl worth keeping starts with FWB
>>17181905
Maybe you're right, but it's really tough for me to express how perfect she was. She was always doing things for me, always showing that she cared. I've never seen someone act so warm and comforting.
I've never met a girl like that. It's hard to explain.
>>17181880
We are in a same positions with you, OP.
She was so warm with me and i did my best with her. We ended up after two years because i found that she was sleeping around.
She said that reason is not me, it was something with her and now im trying to calm down because i believe that she just start acting like a whore... After all we had together.
At least that feel of being clean help me in a way, but thats not enough, how can im be sure that it wouldn't happen next time?
Im feel shit, OP, any thoughts you can provide about it?
>>17182146
Jesus, did we date the same girl or something?
The only thing that keeps me going is knowing that it was her fault, not mine. And that I was always fair to her. Sounds like you are in the same exact boat as me.
I don't want to blame others girls before getting to know them. But it definitely can't hurt to have a talk with the next girl about things that are clearly okay and not okay in the relationship to set clear boundaries. That is my plan.
>>17182202
Dude, my main thought is "I did it well, she doesn't". We should move forward, we should get that shit out of our life, even if it was the best times.
She is beatufil, i felt myself so comfortable with her, but now she is different and we should accept it. The fact that im a clearly honest man healing my soul, making me feel as a decent person and giving confidence of being cool.
Forget about her, OP. I know is hard, but please be strong to find a decent person just like you.
>>17182425
I feel like she's so different now. Almost like I fell in love with a different version of her who would have never violated my trust in the way she did. And who would have always looked out for my heart.
I want to find someone new, but I recognize it's not something I can force.
I'm glad to know that I'm not alone in my struggles. It gets so easy to feel like you're the only person in the world facing misfortune.
It will take time, but I think we will both be fine so long as we continue to try our best.
