![between_a_rock_and_a_hard_placev2[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/nKwG00P.jpg "between_a_rock_and_a_hard_placev2[1].jpg")
Hi /adv/.
My problem is that I'm not sure whether I should return some paintings I recently bought.
The reason why I consider returning them is that I got mad at my mother for painting my window borders while I wasn't there (yes I get mad about something like that for some reason - I'm not sure why).
Anyway, she painted the window borders because I asked her whether she still had some white paint left since I am planning to freshly paint my walls before I hang the paintings there. She did have more than enough paint left and so she decided to "do me a favor" by also painting the old window borders with some of it.
Now I clearly hurt her feelings (again). This, in turn, makes me feel bad about myself (especially since I'm a failure as a son). I usually get rid of things that remind me of bad experiences in my life. I hate being reminded of bad things that happened in the past. I would probably think of this bad experience each time I look at the paintings because they are the reason why I asked my mother for paint in the first place. However, I really like those paintings. More importantly, my mother knows that I wanted hang the paintings on that wall. If I return them and she asks me about it, I either have to lie about it and pretend that I didn't like them (which is a pretty obvious lie because I said multiple times how much I liked all of them), or I tell her the truth and probably make her feel even worse ("my son now cannot enjoy his paintings because of me").
What do you suggest I do?
>>17177512
Find a job
>>17177516
I hate my job. That's why I value my free time at home a lot and want to keep anything that makes me feel bad out of that sacred relaxation space.
>>17177524
you sound super autistic, I'm sorry I don't understand how your mind works well enough to offer you any correct advice
to me, I wouldn't have gotten mad about the window being painted, and I wouldn't feel any resentment from viewing the paintings. Basically you miss me on every level because I can't relate to any of this.
>>17177543
>you sound super autistic
I often suspect that I've got some kind of mental disability that isn't as noticable as other disabilities and that's why it hasn't been discovered yet.
> I'm sorry I don't understand how your mind works well enough to offer you any correct advice
Perhaps think about a situation that is similar but involves things that would upset you?
You bought an object. As a consquence, you ended up hurting the feelings of somebody you care about. The object now reminds you of that bad experience. However, getting rid of the object has a high likelihood of further hurting that person's feelings.
>>17177554
Basically I mean that the object wouldn't torment me just by it's existence, it wouldn't be ruined because I associate it with the memory, it would be a very 'meh' feeling
I think that you should just keep if if you actually are worried about your mothers feelings, but if it gets too much to bear then just explaining yourself and emotions will net you in a sitiation where nobody's feelings are hurt because in my opinion, it's weird enough for these paintings to effect you that much for her to understand it being a weird personality thing rather than you actually wanting to hurt her feelings, basically wanting to throw those paintings away is bizarre enough where I think that you're okay that if you do as long as you explain why.
I don't know if that helps at all.
>>17177622
Thank you very much for your advice.
Obviously the money is lost if I throw them away later but I don't really care about the money that much. It's more important that I don't feel bad (making myself happy was the point of getting them in the first place).
Perhaps I should keep them for a while and get rid of them after my mother forgot about it. Then she might still wonder why the paintings are gone but won't associate it with this incident. However, that means that I will not only lose the money but also burn them more into my memory.
