So i joined a dating site, against my better judgement ( i don't have a single mom fetish) just to check it out. The thing is, I really lied a lot on my profile. I did use a real pic of my though, so is it still bad?
I read here and other places that girls don't message guys, or at least rarely do. I've only been on the site for 24 hours and I've already been messaged several times. Is it because of the bs i put in my writeup? or do you think that mainly the look at the pic of you? if its the latter, then i don't feel too bad, since almost all women i've met lie constantly lol.
Should i feel bad about hooking up with any of them, if they claim to "not be looking for fwb.etc" i assume they mostly mean "not looking for an unnattractive hookup"?
TL;DR is lying online really that bad? I used a real and current pic, and not even shopped/lighting to look better, just average day.
>>17174364
What specifically did you lie about?
>>17174364
Well it depends , if you claimed to be fortune 500 buiness owner while you're really unemployed then it's probably what you wrote instead of your picture.
If you wrote you like to go mountain climbing and kids while you really hate them it's probably the pic.
>>17174364
it depends what you lied about.
if you said
>I'm 6'0"
when really you're 5'10" its not so bad. but if you're really 5'6" you are probably going to get a lot of women confused and upset.
if you said you are looking to date and are only looking to hook up, you might make people mad after the fact or find girls that arent putting out as fast as you'd like.
it all just depends. we cant tell what a girl responded to without knowing what you wrote. its likely a combination of both, but to what degree we dont know.
>girls never message guys
this is something ugly guys or plainly average guys say. despite how humble guys think they are, they all tend to rate themselves a point higher or at least say 'IVE SEEN UGLY GUYS WITH HOT GIRLS SO THAT MUST MEAN I COULD GET ONE SIMPLY FOR EXISTING'. so they dont realize they arent attractive at all.
i get a steady stream of messages from girls. not always hot ones mind you, but i get a steady stream
I'm not a moral authority so I don't see the importance of answering that question.
Question is, do you think that if you meet some of these people, they will feel completely fooled?
If you're lies are thing like I make 100k and own a condo in Manhattan then you might be attracting people that won't be slightly interested in the real you
>>17174364
>I've only been on the site for 24 hours and I've already been messaged several times.
Bear in mind that dating scams are a very real thing, and surprisingly common. Scammers have learned that the "AM NIGERIA PRINCE SEND MONIES PL0X" doesn't cut it anymore, then tend to be a lot more convincing these days.
Hah, no i didn't claim to be super wealthy (at the moment I'm living on some savings, some work, and some passive income (small rental property) I did lie about work, since saying "i have money, and don't need to work full time" seemed like it would invite golddiggers...
I lied about being educated (i finished highschool, tradeschool, but didn't actually get my university degree)
I exaggerated a bit about my love of being really active (i'm clearly not overweight since my pics show my entire body) I don't "love hiking" or "love working out" but i didn't feel it was that bad since really, how many fat chicks on there put down gym/sports as their main hobby LOL
i don't really want kids but i put "open to having them" i have an impregnation fetish so i couldn't be honest about never wanting any lol.
Mostly I lied about work, and education, and being "ambitious" (again, some of the girls there work at walmart/MCd's and put very ambitious down) i also lied about smoking and drinking, since i am trying to quit smoking completely (i had 1 a day, a few times a week now at most) and i don't like to drink with people/party anymore (usually mix a drink or few at night when bored/lonely)
>>17174397
still depends. some of that information likely helped to seal the deal, but in many cases, the women were already hooked by your profile pic.
id recommend changing the ones like 'dont have to work' and just remove the kids option if thats possible. maybe just ommit your education no one needs to know that.
see if the messages still come in
>>17174389
Yes i did say i'm 6 foot. I think i'm 5'9 or so. I find it hilariously shallow that girls think that being 6+foot is super important, beyond even finding a guy who is non abusive. So i guess if they meet me and pull out a measuring tape, then get mad and want to leave, i actually won't care lol
As i said i've only been on a day now, and i suppose yes i would call it a "steady stream" so far no fat girls have messaged me, though many have viewed me. Only 1 single mom train-wreck-life has messaged me, and i'm pretty sure she just wants sex, though her profile says the opposite. women in general aren't great and saying exactly what they mean, in my experience.
>>17174393
Haha, no i've seen so much of that, I'd be able to smell it a mile away, i'm 99% positive every message i've gotten is a real person from my area of the world. I can just tell when something is an urgent business proposal or not.
>>17174417
I was going to try not putting in education or work, leaving it blank or vague, but every girl i've met in the past year asks both of those questions immediately (its like i tell them my name, and they want to know if i went to ___ university and what i do for work, and then some semi-vague question to find out how much money i have)
>>17174430
I will remove the part about being open to having kids :(
It doesn't seem like one particular lie or factor attracted the girls, it seems that you have put up basically a "I require certain standards of you because I have these traits to match". Of course you are going to get a lot of curious people putting out feelers. If you think this translates to any actual date, you're wrong.
>>17174472
Hmm i've already been asked out, which i sort of find rare. I've never had a girl straight up ask me out or anything. I'd by lying if i said i wasn't enjoying this dating site attention, I guess now I know what women feel like, haha.
>>17174423
Why are short guys so insecure? Saying you're 6 feet when you're 5'9" is like a 6'3" guy saying he's 6'6". Do you not think people will notice?
If you're intelligent and well versed being dishonest about education level isn't a huge deal. Being dishonest about work is not a huge deal so long as you have money to back up your claim. Ambition can change, so that's no big deal.
Lying about desire for kids can bite you in the ass if you develop a deep relationship with someone who wants them.
>>17174607
haha deep relationship... with dating site tier girls... had a giggle there
I'm not really insecure about my height, i think im fine. I just read that girls are shallow about it, so i figured why not lie about it? I mean shit, i've been browsing profiles today, and find it strange how so many women there claim to love camping, fishing, hunting, shooting, hockey, beer. I think perhaps they're stretching the truth a bit.
My main reason for lying a bit is because I think if i'm given a chance to actually talk, they could get to know me and like me. I think once they like me for who i am, the height thing will play off as a joke. I could always say "oh i must have done that accidentally". I see a lot of fat girls with pics hiding it, and body type listed as "athletic" or "average" i find that worse than lying about my height because, i mean i can't change height, they can change their fatness level. Why lie about it if you could actually change it by not eating tons of ice cream and take out?
>>17174423
How is having standards of a certain height different than having standards of a certain weight?
I almost definitely wouldn't lie about your height online, as you're more than likely exaggerating your height even at 5ft9 and it is what I would consider as being quite short for a guy. If I was expecting a date with a guy who described himself as 6ft but was clearly under, I'd already be thinking about what else he had lied about.
If you want to lie about your achievements to impress women, that's one thing (but still pretty stupid), but the second you lie about your physical appearance you're taking a huge risk.
>>17174580
Well, these women are also quite experienced in the dating site game and are more likely to be sussing you out than have a date-date where you try to find out each other's attractive points and common ground.
Arguably, she's probably already on to you on a lot of the lies that you have written down, from previous experiences of profile vs reality, and has decided that your lie is within the acceptable range.
>>17174618
I suppose it depends on the dating site and your/their goal for being there.
I agree with you about women being dishonest and more often than not using old pictures or flattering angles to hide their size. Perhaps they're not honest about their hobbies because they're looking for someone who they can or would get into those things with.
It would be hard to "playoff as a joke" that you pressed a 6 instead of a 5' "x".
My sister and her friends use to use online dating to find a real relationship, not hookups and such. The amount of times I've heard them complain that the guys were shorter than they said irritated them. They might not say anything to you but they can tell.
>>17174623
Well because height is something you can't change. To me the main difference is that your height isn't a reflection of your character, whereas slowly committing suicide by gluttonously eating junk and never exercising is a huge character flaw.
>>17174629
i can see that, i've seen a lot of women lying so far, and I've decided some of the bs i'm ok with.
>>17174641
Hmm I guess I don't really care if some girl is irritated, lol. I don't really want to date any girl that thinks being under 6ft tall is the ultimate deal breaker.
>>17174423
>Yes i did say i'm 6 foot. I think i'm 5'9 or so.
Mate, there is a MASSIVE difference between 5'9" and 6'. No way is anyone going to not notice that.
>>17174777
Haha, well i dont' care. I guess we'll find out though, going on 2 dates tonight.
>>17174780
Wear heels.
