Being a new parent
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
I feel like shit for not being too good in taking care of my newborn ( I"m the dad).
This is my first child and I have zero experience with children as I am the only child in my family and I only have a few relatives who live quite far.
Is this ok though? I am always quite stiff when carrying my daughter and she is not too comfortable and I am struggling at getting the right angle when feeding her from the bottle. Wife is not too happy with this although she completely understands why.
All I am good at is prepping her items and bottles to ensure that wife is not too burdened.
Pic related, baby's head.
Every new parent feels this way, man and woman. All you can do is continue at it and eventually you'll get the hang of it, ignore your wife on that.
Congrats
make sure she's breast fed and keeps her mouth closed. You want her face to grow attractive.
>>17094942
You'll get the hang of it, she's just a newborn. You've got years left of this anon, don't worry just keep practicing
It's very normal!
I hope your wife isn't nagging you too much. A lot of girls do because they think there is only one right way to do stuff.
If she is able to tell you something in a friendly way, you can try to do it that way.
Otherwise, the most important thing to do when looking after a baby is being emphatic. Try to imagine being in your babies "shoes", see things from her perspective to find out what she needs or what would make her more comfortable. But some things just need to be learnt. For example the "right bottle angle". It's about making sure she's not swallowing any air, to avoid belly aches. Maybe get one of those "daddy how to-books"? There are a lot of those things you just CAN'T know inside.
Good luck and congrats! Also, try to not stress it so much. She will be a big girl soon.
Enjoy her being a baby as much as possible.
>>17094942
Don't forget that newborn are made sturdy enough to withstand new parents!!! Just keep trying, you'll get the hang of it. There is a book called Be Prepared: A field guide for new Dads, which is really fun and helpful. Don't let your wife give you too much trouble. You have to get used to baby just like baby has to get used to you. You obviously care, that's what's important.
Thank you so far for the supports!
The books mentioned in one of the post sounds great. I'll give it a go.
Anyone has other daddy how to books recommendation?
A few hours after posting this thread I tried a lot of things even though my arms were stiff as fuck. Thankfully dear daugther seem to understood that daddy is struggling.
Any fathers here care to share how you cope with your firstborn son or daugther?
>>17096220
I felt ashamed that i didn't bond with my firstborn to begin with. But i learned later that this is normal. I now have 3 sons, and i bonded with them easily. In the beginning, let the mother take care of all the closeness, and you assist in any way you can. Your time comes in a few months.
It's as if nature intended for you to focus on gathering what you need in the beginning, and you're only supposed to get emotionally involved once the kid is old enough to come with you.
>>17095356
OP here. Just bought that book, hilarious but very informative. I had already bought a book called What to Expect on the First Year, but it is kinda harder to digest. This one is very practical and less touchy feely.
Have a pic of her eyes as my gratitude.
>>17096311
bruh why is your kid asian
>>17096317
I am asian bruh.
>>17096311
Kill it.
>>17096311
Awwww
Also, look into pic related
>>17096324
Who would have thunk
>>17094942
Ask at the hospital where the baby was born if they know of any classes or support groups for new parents. Or just chat with every mother and father of a baby you see on the street. You'll make friends, pick up some ideas, and discover that EVERY new parent feels like you.
Photo of baby shoe on baby head pls.
Also you'll be fine. The first kid is a steep learning curve. Just remember to always keep your calm and if the sleep deprivation hits and you just can't go on any more, place the baby somewhere safe and warm and go out of the room for a minute.
It comes naturally to some people, but not to everyone, and that's okay. You'll get the hang of it. I held my newborn like a faberge egg for the first month or so.
My biggest oops was I occasionally fell asleep with the baby in my arms due to sleep deprivation and how relaxing breastfeeding was. Luckily my partner was around to wake me whenever it happened. That stopped happening after the first few weeks.
At the very least, being able to prepare bottles/equipment and make things easier on your wife is very valuable. She should appreciate the help.
Pic related
>>17098099
OP here, was thinking of doing the kiwi thing tho.
>>17098075
That's what I do for now. When she's feeding, or changing the diapers, or bathing (before I go to work) I go OPERATOR as fuck with the equipment
Also, the bottle sterilizer and warmer is my area of expertise.
I'm just trying to help making things happen as of now while learning how not to snap her neck when carrying.
>>17096444
Seems to be a good book.
I am thinking of doing my wife a favor one day by letting her go shopping or something while I take care of the little girl. Hence I need to make myself skillful and useful.
Might help with her post partum mood swings.
You're doing good work OP. Keep it up!
>>17097806
The sleep deprivation is my biggest challenge as typically it makes me very irritable especially on work related shit.
Thankfully I have been able to keep my cool even when my wife cannot. I was once told that the mood in the room also affects the baby, so I guess only 1 person is allowed to be irritated and that is one person too many as well.
Apparently swinging the baby while sleepy makes her sleepy as well. Either it's my heart going zombie mode or I did a good job.
Tried putting a sock on head for fun but she grabbed it from my hand and threw it like a motherfucker. This girl is kryptonian or she doesn't like to be fucked with.
>>17096311
What a cute little Asian baby
>>17094942
lol your baby is bald
